Cheese & Crackers In Bed With Lala Kent

Summary

Detox Retox with Tom Schwartz Episode: Cheese & Crackers In Bed With Lala Kent
Release Date: July 1, 2025

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1. Exploring Sobriety and Social Identity

The episode delves into the complexities of sobriety and the challenges individuals face when redefining their social identities without alcohol or other substances. Tom Schwartz opens the conversation by addressing common fears associated with sobriety, such as concerns about becoming boring or losing charm.

Tom Schwartz [01:05]: "What if I'm bored? What if I'm boring? What if I'm less charming. What if I'm less me?"

He highlights the cultural shift towards reduced alcohol consumption, citing statistics that show a significant increase in Americans striving to drink less, particularly among Gen Z.

Tom Schwartz [05:15]: "Recent surveys found 49% of Americans are actively trying to drink less in 2025, a 44% increase from 2023."

2. Introducing Lala Kent and Their Relationship

Lala Kent joins Tom on the podcast, bringing a personal touch to the discussion. Their interaction unveils an unexpected romantic relationship, which becomes a humorous and heartfelt subplot throughout the episode.

Lala Kent [08:04]: "I hope you get sponsored by Lovesack after that intro."

The revelation of their relationship adds depth to the conversation, blending personal anecdotes with broader themes of sobriety and self-improvement.

3. Alternatives to Substance Use: Introducing Yadam Inhalers

A significant portion of the episode focuses on exploring alternatives to alcohol and drugs for achieving mental clarity and emotional balance. Tom introduces Yadam, a Thai herbal inhaler, as an example of aromatherapy that can boost mood and alleviate symptoms like nausea and dizziness.

Tom Schwartz [07:50]: "It's essentially just aromatherapy. It's got a little menthol in there, camphor, and Borneo, which is a fragrant substance known for its mild pain-relieving and cooling effects."

Lala shares her positive experience with Yadam, emphasizing its calming properties without the adverse effects associated with substances like alcohol.

Lala Kent [33:02]: "Can I tell you what it reminds me of? Like, if Vic's vapor rub were, like, organic."

4. Personal Reflections and Sobriety Journey

Lala Kent opens up about her journey to sobriety, discussing the struggles and triumphs she has experienced over the past seven years. She candidly shares her reluctance to attend sobriety meetings, preferring social interactions like playdates over formal settings.

Lala Kent [22:26]: "I just want to go to a play date with some mom friends and just like, gossip about shit."

Tom complements her honesty, reinforcing the idea that sobriety can lead to a fulfilling and adventurous life without reliance on substances.

Tom Schwartz [22:44]: "You seem like you have almost complete harmony, at least right now in this moment. You really do."

5. The Love Portal and Astrology Discussion

The conversation takes a whimsical turn as Tom introduces the concept of a "love portal" based on astrological events. They humorously speculate whether this celestial alignment has influenced their budding romance.

Tom Schwartz [10:02]: "Hard launch. It's official. Lala I."

While not deeply rooted in astrology, this segment adds a playful dimension to their interaction, showcasing their chemistry and camaraderie.

6. Motherhood and Personal Growth

Lala shares heartfelt insights into her life as a single mother, emphasizing the joy and fulfillment she derives from her children. She discusses the balance between personal happiness and the responsibilities of parenthood, illustrating how sobriety has enabled her to be present and engaged with her family.

Lala Kent [18:08]: "What makes you happy to your very core. Makes me happy to be at every pickup, every drop off, every dance recital."

Tom echoes her sentiments, highlighting the beauty of living a life rich with meaningful experiences sans substances.

Tom Schwartz [18:38]: "I love that you. That you're okay. You're at peace with being single, but you're open to love."

7. Revisiting Past Experiences: A Walk Down Memory Lane

Through a nostalgic Q&A session reminiscent of James Lipton's Inside the Actor's Studio, Tom and Lala reminisce about their past, revealing personal stories from high school, early careers, and their time on reality television.

Tom Schwartz [45:11]: "What is your favorite way to relax? To detox?"

This segment provides listeners with a deeper understanding of Lala's background, her challenges, and her growth over the years.

8. Special Segment: Reflecting on Recovery with Bert

Towards the episode's end, Tom introduces Bert, a mutual friend recovering from addiction. Their heartfelt conversation underscores the themes of resilience and the transformative power of sobriety.

Bert [53:06]: "Never give up on anything in life and never stop."

Tom expresses profound pride and admiration for Bert's journey, reinforcing the supportive community essential for recovery.

Tom Schwartz [54:49]: "I love you, bro. We're going to wrap it up and probably head to West Hollywood, get a little."

9. Conclusion and Final Thoughts

The episode wraps up with reflections on the discussions held, emphasizing the importance of finding joy and fulfillment in life without relying on substances. Tom thanks his guests and listeners, leaving them with a message of hope and encouragement.

Tom Schwartz [59:43]: "You guys didn't hear that? Okay, I gotta go. What sound or noise relaxes you?"

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Notable Quotes

• Tom Schwartz [01:05]: "What if I'm bored? What if I'm boring? What if I'm less charming. What if I'm less me?"

• Lala Kent [08:04]: "I hope you get sponsored by Lovesack after that intro."

• Tom Schwartz [07:50]: "It's essentially just aromatherapy. It's got a little menthol in there, camphor, and Borneo, which is a fragrant substance known for its mild pain-relieving and cooling effects."

• Lala Kent [22:26]: "I just want to go to a play date with some mom friends and just like, gossip about shit."

• Bert [53:06]: "Never give up on anything in life and never stop."

• Tom Schwartz [54:49]: "I love you, bro. We're going to wrap it up and probably head to West Hollywood, get a little."

Key Takeaways

• Sobriety as a Path to Personal Growth: The episode emphasizes that sobriety can lead to a richer, more fulfilling life without the negative repercussions of substance use.

• Community and Support: Both Lala and Bert highlight the importance of a strong support system in maintaining sobriety and personal well-being.

• Exploring Alternatives: Innovative solutions like Yadam inhalers offer alternative methods for achieving mental and emotional balance.

• Honest Conversations: Open and honest discussions about personal struggles and triumphs provide listeners with relatable insights into the journey of sobriety.

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This episode of Detox Retox successfully intertwines personal anecdotes with broader discussions on sobriety, offering listeners both inspiration and practical alternatives to substance use. Through the engaging dialogue between Tom Schwartz and Lala Kent, complemented by Bert's heartfelt story, the episode serves as a testament to the transformative power of choosing a mindful, substance-free lifestyle.

Transcript

[Lala Kent]

There's some incredible TV coming out of the UK right now. Brits just do it differently. The accents, the wit, the scenery, the devastating one liners disguised as compliments. It's all streaming on Britbox. They have the best mysteries, dramas, comedies and seriously addicting originals like Outrageous, based on the true story of the Mitford sisters. They were kind of like the Kardashians of the 1930s. Wealthy, audacious, chaotic, wildly opinionated and always making headlines. And chances are you've never heard their story. It's stunning, it's jaw dropping, it's very British. So check out Outrageous. It could be your next favorite. Don't miss Outrageous. Streaming now, only on Britbox. It's now time for your weekly detox with Tom Schwartz.

[Tom Schwartz]

What if I'm bored? What if I'm boring? What if I'm less charming? What if I'm lonely? Oh my God, what if I'm less me? Will ever I want to go out again? These are some questions I've heard echoed from my recently sober friend. Sober, curious. And maybe they're not so much worried about losing alcohol, but losing their social identity. I know it's a little extreme, but it's legitimate concern. Just ask any of my sober friends, by the way, and they'll regale you with all the benefits and the upsides of getting high in your own supply of endorphins. I mean, but yeah, drinking culture, the times are changing and you guys know I love my margaritas, maybe a baby shot. And no, despite what you may have seen on Benipam Rules, I can self regulate. I'm blessed to not have to worry about becoming an addict. But for many, it's a slippery slope. One drink too much, 20 drinks, not enough. And just. Yeah, having seen what drinking did to my brother, I've seen firsthand the havoc it can wreak on your mind, body, soul. Man, I've witnessed it guys. Once it gets a hold of you, it's got you and it owns you. Yeah, the times are a change. And I mean drinking all calls not going anywhere, let's face it. But just looking at some stats around the web, recent survey found 49 of Americans are actively trying to drink less in 2025. That's a 44 increase from 2023. Also, this has been low key, championed by Gen Z and kind of a generational shift or something. I mean, look at this. Among Gen Z, 21% abstain entirely and 39% drink only occasionally. These are big numbers. They consume approximately 20% less alcohol per capita than millennials or boomers. That said, with love, boomers. But yeah, nearly half of us adults are embracing the sober, curious movement of reducing alcohol consumption. And it's a good thing. Again, you guys know I love a nice, healthy retox. I'm an advocate for drinking in moderation. But again, for many that's just. It's not an option. It's not an option. But yeah, this episode, it's not really about addiction or sobriety per se. It's more just about how, how people who are sober like to let loose, you know. And by the way, there's no implication there that life without these vices is not fun, obviously. On the contrary, for a lot of people it's a redefining moment, kind of an eye opening revelation. Yes, life can still be rich and fun and adventurous and weird and awesome without drugs or alcohol or whatever vice you're vicing. But yeah, I'd like to have some reoccurring episodes where we kind of dive into specific ways that sober and sober curious still stimulate their minds. Because like one of my, not my favorite, one thing I love about having a drink or maybe smoking a J, you know, besides the obvious, is how it shifts my perspective. It kind of loosens the grip a little, you know, helps me be a little more reflective, maybe, maybe even get a little more honest with myself. And yeah, sometimes too honest. Like I'm talking mini shame spiral anxiety. Talking to you. 20 milligram chocolate edibles. Sons of bitches. No, thank you. No, thank you very much. But yeah, lately I, I just, I've been curious. What are some other ways that people get a mental reset? The introspection, the, the insight without the, the, the hangover or anxiety. Existential dread. Yeah, of course, all the, you know, all the. You guys, again, we know this. Running, reading, travel, cold plunges, maybe your California sober meditation, maybe you're a foodie, you like to feast, travel. But yeah, yeah, this is a fun one. This is a fun one. Today we're giving LA la. I already did the interview. But yeah, we tried something that I learned about when I was in Thailand from Thai culture. I was in Bangkok. I didn't actually try it, but it's called Yadam, which is like, that's Y A D O M. It's like a little herbal inhaler that boosts your mood or calm you down, bring you a little Zen, a little peace. It also can help with nausea, dizziness, maybe helping clear like a mental block. I mean, yeah, we do it, we try it together. And yeah, it's essentially just aromatherapy. It's got a little menthol in there. Camphor, which Camphors like the crystalline substance with a kind of a crisp, cooling scent that's supposed to help you alleviate or can help you alleviate dizziness. And Borneo, which is like a look in here. It's like a fragrant substance known for its mild pain, relieving, and cooling effects. Borneo. I know camphor comes from a tree, but yeah, I mean, you can get this, you guys, by smelling a rose. More or less. Aromatherapy, Maybe some lavender, some eucalyptus. But, yeah, this was a fun one. I had a really good time. Lala made me laugh a lot. And, yeah, I'm just happy to see her happy. All right, guys, let's get into it. You guys, I am here live. I on the couch. The Love Sack with the lovely miss Lala Kent. Mamacita.

[Lala Kent]

I hope you get sponsored by Lovesack after that intro.

[Tom Schwartz]

Been there, done that.

[Lala Kent]

Really?

[Tom Schwartz]

Yeah. I have a Love sack, too. Oh, I love my Love Sack.

[Lala Kent]

A couch?

[Tom Schwartz]

Yeah, it's a couch.

[Lala Kent]

Yeah. Dude, they're killing it. Would you have the whole system set up where, like, you put the.

[Tom Schwartz]

Just the couch.

[Lala Kent]

That's what I did, too. I didn't put, like, the subwoofers in.

[Tom Schwartz]

Yeah, no, I love it.

[Lala Kent]

Sheena did all the bells and whistles.

[Tom Schwartz]

She went the whole nine yards.

[Lala Kent]

Yeah, dude, her whole couch was, like, 25, 000. Not really, but it was a lot.

[Tom Schwartz]

I love your crib, by the way. This is my first time upstairs.

[Lala Kent]

Really?

[Tom Schwartz]

I'm 10 out of 10 cozy right now.

[Lala Kent]

It's a cozy spot.

[Tom Schwartz]

We're laying on the couch. We're in the. Do you call it Casa Kent?

[Lala Kent]

I just call it my house.

[Tom Schwartz]

Your house. Your crib, by the way. You guys, hold on a sec. We have breaking news.

[Lala Kent]

Okay. What is it?

[Tom Schwartz]

Okay, I didn't want.

[Lala Kent]

Lala. Yeah.

[Tom Schwartz]

Do you want to read it or should I read it?

[Lala Kent]

I think you should read it.

[Tom Schwartz]

I'm gonna hand it to you. You read it. Okay.

[Lala Kent]

I think it's better read it aloud.

[Tom Schwartz]

Yeah. Here we go, guys.

[Lala Kent]

Wait, what is this? After months of whispers and behind the scenes, Buzz Vanderpump rules star. I always hate when they put that. Lalika and Tom Schwartz have officially gone public with their unexpected romance. Sources say the two reality veterans have not only been quietly dating, but are already living together in Los Angeles. So it can't just be Casa de Cant or whatever.

[Tom Schwartz]

If it's on the Internet, it's true, right?

[Lala Kent]

Hyphenated.

[Tom Schwartz]

Is this a hard launch.

[Lala Kent]

10 shorts.

[Tom Schwartz]

This is a hard launch.

[Lala Kent]

Hold on. I haven't seen this. What even is this? Okay, where am I? Okay. We share a home in Los Angeles. Insiders claim the relationship began as a casual connection during late night filming, but quickly evolved into something more serious. While fans are stunned given their rocky history and tangled bravo dynamics, Lala and Schwartz appear unbothered by the drama. They're not hiding anymore. Stories close to production revealed this isn't a fling. With the cameras rolling again and emotions high, this shocking new couple is already shaking up the pump rules universe. What the is going on?

[Tom Schwartz]

Hard launch. It's official. Lala I.

[Lala Kent]

And they chose a photo of me pregnant. So it looks like I'm also carrying your baby. And Kyle Chan's very happy about it.

[Tom Schwartz]

You guys will post this. I know it's audio only, but is this. Is it official?

[Lala Kent]

I'm sweating, by the way.

[Tom Schwartz]

So I woke up today, the first thing I see from my good, dear friend Jesus, who you've met.

[Lala Kent]

Yeah.

[Tom Schwartz]

A text. He's like, hit me up. He's like, what's up with you and Lala? And then he sent me a screenshot of this. And then I got another text from somebody else, another article. Rumors abound today that we're dating.

[Lala Kent]

Well, I guess we should talk about it here.

[Tom Schwartz]

You know what, though? It's funny because apparently I wrote this down. Yesterday there was a love portal, a once in a 250 year love portal that opened up. I guess it's like it was the ideal, the ripest time in 250 years to put a love spell on someone. Oh, did you put a love spell on me?

[Lala Kent]

I won't even lie, Schwartz. I've had. Since the podcast that you did. My podcast?

[Tom Schwartz]

Yeah.

[Lala Kent]

I've had some dreams and I wake up a little. I'm like, what the fuck?

[Tom Schwartz]

No.

[Lala Kent]

What's happening here?

[Tom Schwartz]

Listen, allow that. I think. I'm not. I'm no astrologist, guys, so bear with me. But it says, it said yesterday we had Jupiter, Kazimi and a new moon happening in the sign of cancer.

[Lala Kent]

I don't know what that means. We need Ally Luber.

[Tom Schwartz]

Ally, we need you. And apparently today, I don't know if the portal. I guess the portal's closed now. But if you could have put a love spell on someone, who would it be? Who would it have been? You don't have to say names. Is there someone?

[Lala Kent]

I don't even know? I don't think I haven't thought about men in a romantic way. In Like, a very long time.

[Tom Schwartz]

And I love that about you.

[Lala Kent]

Is that sad?

[Tom Schwartz]

No, it's. It's empowering. It's inspiring for all the people out there who feel, I don't know, some sort of existential dread about not having found their twin flame or soul mate. And they have angst about you guys. Be like, lala.

[Lala Kent]

Yeah, it'll, like. I feel like it'll come one day when it's supposed to. I'm just not. And a lot of people think that it's weird. Like, a lot of people ask me, like, are you dating? And when I say no, they go, oh, you'll be able to put yourself out there someday. I'm like, what?

[Tom Schwartz]

I don't need your pity.

[Lala Kent]

Like, this is not. And when I tell people, I'm like, I may not. Like, I could be fine by myself, they're like, oh, no, it's okay. Like, you're gonna find someone. I'm like, I'm not asking. This is like, just me being open to, like, whatever the universe places me in. We're gonna know that. Like, that's where we're supposed to be.

[Tom Schwartz]

Exactly. I love that. Okay, it. Hypothetically, if you did. If you could have put a love spell, would you have maybe put a love spell on Kaden?

[Lala Kent]

Who's.

[Tom Schwartz]

I got you. You guys. Sorry.

[Lala Kent]

Wait, like, Kaden, my first.

[Tom Schwartz]

Yeah, your first crush. I talked to your mom.

[Lala Kent]

That makes so much sense. She goes, lauren, remind me of that boy. You, like, really had a crush on him. He lived near us. No, he's like, full Mormon.

[Tom Schwartz]

Okay.

[Lala Kent]

And like, looking back. Yeah, but it's like, very skinny and tall and weird and Mormon.

[Tom Schwartz]

But at the time, he was your first crush.

[Lala Kent]

Yeah, but at the time Kaden slapped Kayden.

[Tom Schwartz]

Yeah.

[Lala Kent]

Kaden was a panty dropper.

[Tom Schwartz]

Do you think I. Kaden. If you're listening, shout out to Kaden.

[Lala Kent]

Yeah, dude. And he came from, like, a family of eight kids. Wow.

[Tom Schwartz]

Yeah, I come from a family of eight kids.

[Lala Kent]

What?

[Tom Schwartz]

Yeah, I got me my three brothers.

[Lala Kent]

Yeah.

[Tom Schwartz]

My sister. And then I. Yeah. My mom, my dad. And then I have three. I have three half siblings. Sarah, Laura and Jeff, My dad's previous marriage.

[Lala Kent]

I was going to ask you if you're a Mormon, but they would be full siblings because I have the credentials. No divorce. Oh, not a good look.

[Tom Schwartz]

That's a deal breaker.

[Lala Kent]

Well, they don't. They prefer you not get divorced. And if you do, you have to go, like, do the whole temple divorce thing. I won't bore you with that.

[Tom Schwartz]

No, this is Good stuff.

[Lala Kent]

I would put with the portal. Probably Odell Beckham.

[Tom Schwartz]

Odell's a stud.

[Lala Kent]

Yeah.

[Tom Schwartz]

And he's got flair.

[Lala Kent]

Yeah. But he'd have to eat Gouda cheese in the bed with me.

[Tom Schwartz]

Wait, is that like. Is that a fetish? Not a fetish, but no. I love that.

[Lala Kent]

I want to get in the bed.

[Tom Schwartz]

Yeah.

[Lala Kent]

I'm filthy as fuck, it sounds like. Right. I'm clean as it gets. I have a towel, nothing in the bed. Right?

[Tom Schwartz]

Yeah.

[Lala Kent]

And I eat the Gouda cheese with my Ritz crackers while watching Sex and the City right now.

[Tom Schwartz]

Now you're talking. Yeah, Keep going, Keep going. Just kidding.

[Lala Kent]

No Perrier.

[Tom Schwartz]

Oh, my God. Not Mountain Springs.

[Lala Kent]

The Perrier. No.

[Tom Schwartz]

Well, we missed the love portal. But apparently today, by the way, I'm not big into astrology, but I'm at a point where I'm like, why not? I'm okay with the woo woo lately. But apparently Today is the 26th, right? The biggest day. It's a new moon. The biggest day for manifestation for the next 12 years. So if you want to manifest something, you know what we're supposed to do?

[Lala Kent]

What?

[Tom Schwartz]

We're supposed to write our. Our whatever we're manifesting down.

[Lala Kent]

Okay.

[Tom Schwartz]

On a piece of paper.

[Lala Kent]

Okay.

[Tom Schwartz]

And then at night, we're supposed to put a glass of water on top of it.

[Lala Kent]

Okay.

[Tom Schwartz]

And then tomorrow when we wake up, we're supposed to drink it. That way we're literally indulging inhaling.

[Lala Kent]

Yeah.

[Tom Schwartz]

Our manifestations.

[Lala Kent]

I'm doing that tonight.

[Tom Schwartz]

Should we do it?

[Lala Kent]

Yeah.

[Tom Schwartz]

Let's just see what happens.

[Lala Kent]

I think everything I want will come true.

[Tom Schwartz]

What's the worst that could happen?

[Lala Kent]

It doesn't. And big fucking deal. So I am where I am right now. Whatever.

[Tom Schwartz]

That's what I'm saying. I went on like, a little, like, rant about this. Like, what's. What's the downside to believing that a crystal is going to make your life better?

[Lala Kent]

There is no downside. And I believe that when you start believing in something, right, that's like a way of letting the universe know that you're open to it.

[Tom Schwartz]

Yes.

[Lala Kent]

And every single thing, Tom Schwartz, that I have ever manifested in my life, I have gotten.

[Tom Schwartz]

That's beautiful.

[Lala Kent]

I swear to God, you guys listen.

[Tom Schwartz]

To the quantum healing episode. And this is. It's all about the interconnectedness of the mind and body. And like this Lala. I love that. By the way. I've never told anyone this. Back when I was in college, a psychic pretty much has told me in the vaguest form everything that I ever wanted to happen or what she said was going to happen has happened for me, too.

[Lala Kent]

Really?

[Tom Schwartz]

Yeah.

[Lala Kent]

She knew you were going to be on tv.

[Tom Schwartz]

Kind of.

[Lala Kent]

I know. The good ones, they always give. They don't give you, like, the exact thing, right?

[Tom Schwartz]

Yeah.

[Lala Kent]

You like Chris Medina? Have you met with Chris Medina?

[Tom Schwartz]

I haven't met with Chris.

[Lala Kent]

He's so freaking good.

[Tom Schwartz]

Yeah.

[Lala Kent]

I don't like the ones that are like, you're going to have hardships come. It's like, no.

[Tom Schwartz]

There'll be good days and bad days.

[Lala Kent]

Yeah. Thank you.

[Tom Schwartz]

That's a cookie fortune.

[Lala Kent]

It's called life.

[Tom Schwartz]

That's a cookie fortune.

[Lala Kent]

Right.

[Tom Schwartz]

Lala Mama. How's it been with the babies?

[Lala Kent]

I'm in bliss.

[Tom Schwartz]

I know you are. I can see it on your face. You got a glow going right now.

[Lala Kent]

I do.

[Tom Schwartz]

Usually you don't have this glow unless you're preggers. You got the glow.

[Lala Kent]

No, I'm not preggers.

[Tom Schwartz]

You know, how's it been lately?

[Lala Kent]

I'm just so happy.

[Tom Schwartz]

I walked in here and it felt so cozy.

[Lala Kent]

Yeah.

[Tom Schwartz]

It felt so homey.

[Lala Kent]

Like, this is just my life. And I had. I went to that reveal of the Cotrini with Janet and Sheena at the billboard, and there was this girl there who. Who has a podcast, and she was like. She was very blunt, which I always love. But she asked me, like, how are you really doing? And I was like, like, what do you mean? Like right now? She was like, just like, you're not on tv. Like, is it weird? And I was like, I've never been happier.

[Tom Schwartz]

Yeah.

[Lala Kent]

Like, I'm so at peace. And I remember when I turned, it was like eight months on the dot, pregnant. And I told my team when I hit nine months, I want to not be working. Like, I just want to take the rest of the time in this pregnancy to, you know, enjoy her inside of my ba. Inside of my body.

[Tom Schwartz]

Yeah.

[Lala Kent]

And then when she was born, I told them, I don't want to work. I just want to be a mom right now.

[Tom Schwartz]

You manifested this.

[Lala Kent]

Yeah.

[Tom Schwartz]

You really did.

[Lala Kent]

So when I call them and I'm like, hi, what are we doing? They're like, my love, you wanted this. And I was like, oh, yeah, that's right. It's. Anytime I get on social media and I start having anxiety of like, you're not doing enough, bitch.

[Tom Schwartz]

Totally.

[Lala Kent]

And then I start tweaking and I have to check myself and be like, what do you want? What makes you happy? Not. Not. How does the outside world view? You what makes you happy to your very core. Makes me happy to be at every pickup, every drop off, every dance recital. Makes me happy to put my kids to bed and be up with them every morning. And I've gotten to do that.

[Tom Schwartz]

That is so beautiful.

[Lala Kent]

Yeah.

[Tom Schwartz]

We take a moment and just let that marinate.

[Lala Kent]

Yeah.

[Tom Schwartz]

In the universe. That's such a beautiful thing.

[Lala Kent]

It is, really.

[Tom Schwartz]

And by the way, do you ever miss being pregnant?

[Lala Kent]

Oh, yeah. I want to be pregnant. I'd like to get pregnant next year.

[Tom Schwartz]

I hope that wasn't too gauche of a question, but I'm like, no, you.

[Lala Kent]

And I are close. You can ask me whatever the fuck you want.

[Tom Schwartz]

You miss aspects of it.

[Lala Kent]

I love being pregnant, but the bod is a little different now.

[Tom Schwartz]

The bot is looking. I say this respectfully. We are. We are dating now, so I can say this, but the bod is looking insane.

[Lala Kent]

You're very nice. I think after a third, I'm gonna need a mommy makeover where they just, like, nip and tuck. It's all good.

[Tom Schwartz]

Are you. Are you starting. We talked about this a little bit before, but. We did. Are you starting to see some of your idiosyncrasies characteristics in your babies? A little bit.

[Lala Kent]

I see. I see a lot. Oh, Sosa's still very young.

[Tom Schwartz]

Yeah.

[Lala Kent]

But yes. With Ocean. Yes. 100.

[Tom Schwartz]

That's so cute.

[Lala Kent]

She's a little gangster, man.

[Tom Schwartz]

She really is. Yeah, she has. She has, like, a hood spa, like a moxie, you know, she just looks like a little star.

[Lala Kent]

She is a little.

[Tom Schwartz]

She seems very confident.

[Lala Kent]

She's very confident. And I know you're not into astrology. I'm not really, like. I don't know what it means like the full moon or like the love portal, but she's double Pisces. So what that means is you have a sun, you have your moon, and you have your rising. Sun is what you came into the world as. Your moon is how you handle emotions, and your rising is what you strive to be, what you project to the world. Right. She came into the world as a Pisces, and her rising is a Pisces. So you can't tell this bitch nothing. She's like, I know exactly who I am. I was born the exact way I want to project to the world. So she's just, like, already at 4, unapologetically herself. As much as I hate when people say they're unapologetically themselves, she totally is.

[Tom Schwartz]

It is a little cringe, but I think you're right. I see it. I Mean, obviously I don't spend that much time with you and your babies, but like, I see it.

[Lala Kent]

Yeah. But she's a presence, man.

[Tom Schwartz]

She does.

[Lala Kent]

She does have a presence.

[Tom Schwartz]

When I walked in, she looked me dead in the eye. But it was. It was. It was very welcoming, gracious and kind of.

[Lala Kent]

Yeah.

[Tom Schwartz]

She's confident, not cocky.

[Lala Kent]

If that makes 100.

[Tom Schwartz]

That's what I see and feel.

[Lala Kent]

Yeah.

[Tom Schwartz]

What is this? But anyways, that's beautiful. Lala.

[Lala Kent]

I think it's.

[Tom Schwartz]

You're such a good mom.

[Lala Kent]

I'm trying.

[Tom Schwartz]

And going back to what we just said before. I love that you. That you're okay. You're at peace with being single, but you're open to love. We talked about it a little bit.

[Lala Kent]

Yeah, I'm very open to love. Just.

[Tom Schwartz]

Yeah.

[Lala Kent]

I think about where my kids are at right now.

[Tom Schwartz]

Yeah.

[Lala Kent]

And I don't want anybody to take me away from being present in the moment with my kids. And that doesn't just mean physically take me away. When you take me away mentally where I can be with my kids. And maybe I've texted you and you don't text me back and my heart is starting to get involved. Cuz I'm a woman. You have mentally taken me away from my kids. And that I will not stand for. I don't like that.

[Tom Schwartz]

I like. I got to give you props. You're a boss.

[Lala Kent]

Thanks, babe.

[Tom Schwartz]

I think you're kind of an inspiration.

[Lala Kent]

You know, I really do.

[Tom Schwartz]

For.

[Lala Kent]

I hope so.

[Tom Schwartz]

For all the single mothers out there.

[Lala Kent]

And just people who haven't maybe found their person.

[Tom Schwartz]

Exactly. Yeah, Exactly.

[Lala Kent]

It's okay. Like, I think it. However, it is easy to be alone when you know you're not alone, if that makes sense.

[Tom Schwartz]

You have a great support system, 100 good friends. Your mom, Easton. You like everybody. You have a great. A lot of beautiful friends.

[Lala Kent]

Yeah.

[Tom Schwartz]

A lot of people who love you.

[Lala Kent]

So any dude that comes in is gonna have to be a missing puzzle. Like, I'm not trying to figure out how to fit him in. You better come in and fit flawlessly.

[Tom Schwartz]

That was beautifully said.

[Lala Kent]

We're done here, buddy.

[Tom Schwartz]

Downright poetic. I love that. That's. Well, yeah. Can we talk a little bit about sobriety?

[Lala Kent]

Always.

[Tom Schwartz]

Not for the cold transition.

[Lala Kent]

I love a cold transition into being sober.

[Tom Schwartz]

Well, it's kind of like a little bit of the theme of this episode. By the way. How's it going? Is it something. Is it something you ever even think about? Is it second nature? Do you ever. Is it something you still feel like you have to work on. I feel like you've sort of mastered it.

[Lala Kent]

You know, that's actually a really good question because I brought on a new sponsor. I hadn't had a sponsor in a really long time. And I felt very strong in my sobriety. And we planned every Thursday we're going to go to this meeting. Well, cut to. I've been to one meeting with her and bailed on the rest. And she texts me yesterday and says, are we planning on the meeting tomorrow morning? And I wanted so badly to come up with an excuse because I felt like a dead. A degenerate. And I was like, no, you know what the positive about being sober is? I can be brutally honest. And I was like, honestly, every time I plan on going to this meeting, something comes up. And then I wrote, like, example for today. My daughter has a play date, and the moms get together and drink coffee and talk while the kids play. And that just sounds way more fun to me than going to a meeting. So, no, I'm not going.

[Tom Schwartz]

I love that.

[Lala Kent]

Well, I know that I probably should be going to the meeting because that's what the program tells you. Stay close to the program. Yeah, but I'm like, yes, but I'm pretty solid. And I know I only have I will be seven years in October, but I'm like, I feel pretty fucking strong. And if I don't, then, like, I'll pick up the phone, I'll get to a meeting. But, like, I just want to go to a play date with some mom friends and just like, gossip about shit.

[Tom Schwartz]

You seem like you have almost complete harmony, at least right now in this moment. You really do.

[Lala Kent]

Yeah. I think the plus harmonize about my sobriety is that I didn't have any other addictions. I wasn't addicted to weed. I had never done, like, hardcore drugs. I just wasn't like, drinking was my issue.

[Tom Schwartz]

Yeah.

[Lala Kent]

So that is like, a lot of people who are in the meetings, like, you'll hear them talk about, like, the hardcore shit that they went through where I can't relate to any of that. And they can't relate to me being like, I haven't been to a meeting in three months. They'd be like, oh, no, that's like you're off the wagon.

[Tom Schwartz]

Really?

[Lala Kent]

Yeah. I'm admitting something I haven't admitted probably ever.

[Tom Schwartz]

If we go back, like, when you. So I have a friend who's just getting on the sober train. And just like, I've heard this echoed so many times before on the Internet and forums. They're just kind of worried that life's going to become boring or dull.

[Lala Kent]

Yeah.

[Tom Schwartz]

And it's just like. It's like, as we all know, it's so embedded into our culture. Holidays, events, sporting outings, good days, bad days.

[Lala Kent]

Yeah.

[Tom Schwartz]

Everything. Right. Have a drink. Let's celebrate. Pop some champagne. So, yeah, just transitioning from. From, you know, being a part of that to going sober. It's kind of hard. And I think, well, this person was expressing to me that they have some anxiety about their life becoming dull or boring.

[Lala Kent]

Yeah.

[Tom Schwartz]

Or them being boring. I don't know if you wanted to add anything to that. If they're listening to this, I want. I don't want to say that I.

[Lala Kent]

Was very worried going into filming season. I think it was eight of Vanderpump Rules.

[Tom Schwartz]

Yeah.

[Lala Kent]

I was like, I might not be as fun and uninhibited as I once was, but again, I think that's why the program says one day at a time. Because when you look at all of those moments, of course you're going to be like, oh, my God, I can't do this. You just have to kind of start and treat it like a hurdle race. My mom always says you look up and look at all the hurdles like you're going to eat shit. If you just keep your head down and do one at a time, you always finish. Right.

[Tom Schwartz]

I like that. Progress, not perfection.

[Lala Kent]

Yeah, exactly.

[Tom Schwartz]

I like that.

[Lala Kent]

But I mean, I always look at it like, of course, Christmas Day is way more fun. Waking up and having, like, a cocktail in the morning, like, I'm not gonna lie, that was so fun. Super Bowl Sunday is way more fun. But you want to know what's not fun? Is waking up the next day being like, I could drive off of a cliff right now. I felt that that's what, like, the feeling of having a drink on Christmas Day is not worth the feeling that I have the next day.

[Tom Schwartz]

I saw this interview with Josh Brolin, you know, Josh Bowen, the actor, and he's like, I I. He's like, I I. My job as. As a sober person is to make sobriety more fun than my greatest day with, like, boozing. Our romance, or my. My greatest romance with alcohol was. Does that make sense?

[Lala Kent]

That makes sense.

[Tom Schwartz]

Yeah.

[Lala Kent]

I like that resonates with me.

[Tom Schwartz]

I like that. It's like, yeah.

[Lala Kent]

So I don't know, but I feel like a lot of young people are going, like, I guess not sober, but dry, just strictly for, like, the health benefits. Like, they're so obsessed with, like, the way Their skin looks and all of these things. And so they're like. The non alcoholic industry is thriving.

[Tom Schwartz]

It is thriving. And also other ways for people to feel something. Not catch a buzz or get high.

[Lala Kent]

Right.

[Tom Schwartz]

Which can be triggering if you are suffering from addiction. But you know, you know, but if you want to kind of feel something. Your neurotropics, adaptogens, which we talked about in the last episode. Yeah, it's non toxic plants that just kind of make you feel good, help you sort of readapt to homeostasis, feel less stressed, mildly euphoric.

[Lala Kent]

Love this.

[Tom Schwartz]

I love a good adaptogen.

[Lala Kent]

Am I a detox today or detoxing? Oh, great. Okay.

[Tom Schwartz]

By the way, by the way, I brought something. Okay. I brought something for us. By the way. In my experience, I wanted to add this. Like I, you know, I like to tie one off. I like to have a drink. Yeah, I've tried pretty much every drug known to man, but like in my meth. No, okay, not meth, but listen, heroin, the day is young. It is a detox episode.

[Lala Kent]

He leaves the sober girl's house, his sober girlfriend's house, and goes and does. Yes, crystal meth. Lovely.

[Tom Schwartz]

Listen, the day's young, but I want to try something if you're cool with it.

[Lala Kent]

Yeah, yeah.

[Tom Schwartz]

Is that okay?

[Lala Kent]

Yeah, I'm cool.

[Tom Schwartz]

Okay. I brought something, you guys. I brought something. It's cool. By the way, it's on Amazon. It's not crazy. It's not something that would ever compromise your sobriety.

[Lala Kent]

Well, you sent me the link and I approved.

[Tom Schwartz]

I sent you the link.

[Lala Kent]

Which I appreciate.

[Tom Schwartz]

Yeah, so I thought. And by the way, you guys, recovery, it's about mastering emotional regulation without relying on substances and everything.

[Lala Kent]

Love this.

[Tom Schwartz]

This is just. Yeah, this is something that. It's not addictive at all. It's herbal. But it could be habit, for it could be a liability if you're, if you're in the throes of addiction, you don't want anything. Not this, but I'm saying anything. This is a public service announcement.

[Lala Kent]

Well, yes, this is some, some sponsors, by the way, in AA that I've talked to. They're like, oh, I. I don't subscribe to like nicotine or caffeine either because those are also. I'm like, oh, no, that don't, that don't work. I love me a Diet Coke.

[Tom Schwartz]

See, that's. So how, how do you sort of. How do you let. How do you activate the reward systems in your brain? How do you sort of treat yourself? That's what I'm curious about. What's your favorite way to sort of. Yeah. Just not overindulge or do something to excess, but just kind of, you know, treat yourself.

[Lala Kent]

I love a Diet Coke, but also there's like these AF cocktails. It's like alcohol free, which is also a slippery slope for some sober people. I'm fine. But we have these AF cocktails. Palomas. And sometimes when it's been a rough day, I'm like, yo, let's crack an af. I need to get fucked up.

[Tom Schwartz]

I love that. But yeah, I just. Yeah, I guess one of the overarching themes of the episode is just fun little ways to let loose when you are sober.

[Lala Kent]

Yeah, I live the dream.

[Tom Schwartz]

Yeah.

[Lala Kent]

So I, I thoroughly enjoy being sober.

[Tom Schwartz]

No, I think my brother said it best. I was talking to him earlier and he's like, man, I almost died from. I'm high on life.

[Lala Kent]

Yeah.

[Tom Schwartz]

And I felt that, like, I felt that like going, yeah, for me, I never finished my statement before. But like I said, I've done every drug but like the best high is being high on life. Getting seven, eight hours of sleep, waking up early, ambitious, excited about the day. You have plans, you have a vision, you feel good.

[Lala Kent]

Yeah.

[Tom Schwartz]

Talk to your loved ones. Like that's for me. You go to bed early, you have no social obligations. That's all you're going to do is get takeout, watch your favorite show, be in bed by night. Anyways, that's.

[Lala Kent]

You just like said what my life entails. Just so you know, I've again, I've.

[Tom Schwartz]

Traveled the world, I've done every drug. That for me, that's the best feeling.

[Lala Kent]

It's great in the world. I know. What's great is when you feel like shit.

[Tom Schwartz]

Yeah.

[Lala Kent]

You know that you genuinely feel like shit and it's not because you drank too much.

[Tom Schwartz]

Exactly.

[Lala Kent]

I like that too.

[Tom Schwartz]

I love that.

[Lala Kent]

Alright, so I'm gonna sniff this.

[Tom Schwartz]

Okay. By the way, you guys, I'm gonna say it again. I don't want to get flack for us.

[Lala Kent]

Okay?

[Tom Schwartz]

We're not trying to catch a buzz here. This is an herbal. Okay, I'm gonna tell you what this is right now. This is a Thai herbal inhaler, also known as yadam.

[Lala Kent]

Okay.

[Tom Schwartz]

You ever heard of yadam?

[Lala Kent]

No.

[Tom Schwartz]

It was $9.28 on Amazon.

[Lala Kent]

Okay.

[Tom Schwartz]

I sent Lala the link for her approval.

[Lala Kent]

Yeah.

[Tom Schwartz]

And okay, you guys. Refreshing and revitalizing. So it kind of like perks you up a little bit.

[Lala Kent]

Okay.

[Tom Schwartz]

And so like, if you're feeling Drowsy or just low energy. It's like a nice little. It puts a little pep in your side. It's kind of like a. It's kind of like inhaling a coffee.

[Lala Kent]

Oh, fun.

[Tom Schwartz]

You know what I mean? Or just like, smelling a really strong tea.

[Lala Kent]

Well, they have those oils, too, that are, like, revitalizing.

[Tom Schwartz]

Yes.

[Lala Kent]

I love all of that shit.

[Tom Schwartz]

These are like soft core smelling salts.

[Lala Kent]

Great.

[Tom Schwartz]

You know. You know, smelling salts are not to.

[Lala Kent]

Be confused with bath salts. After that guy ate that person's face in Miami. Yes.

[Tom Schwartz]

Did that actually happen?

[Lala Kent]

It certainly did.

[Tom Schwartz]

We need to do a myth buster mythbusters episode on Love a myth.

[Lala Kent]

But.

[Tom Schwartz]

I just got roasted, by the way. I discovered these when I was in Thailand, and I was telling Lala earlier, I was, like, kind of drowsy. And I'm not going to lie. I'll confess. A little hungover in Bangkok. And he's like, you got to try this. And he pulled out one of these, and he's like, just take a little. Take a little sniff, and it'll pep you up, make you feel better. And I was too scared to do it. I was. I was in a foreign land, and I didn't want to sniff a mysterious substance.

[Lala Kent]

But you also need to say that it's not. It doesn't go up your nose. No smell.

[Tom Schwartz]

It's a scent, you guys. It's an aromatic.

[Lala Kent]

Yes. Had Tom Schwartz said, you sniff it up your nose, I was just. Yeah, I would have said, nah.

[Tom Schwartz]

No, no, no, you guys. It's a soothing aroma. You breathe it in. Should we try it?

[Lala Kent]

Yeah, I want to try it.

[Tom Schwartz]

Okay. Oh, okay. You want to go first?

[Lala Kent]

I'm kind of nervous.

[Tom Schwartz]

Oh, it's so fragrant.

[Lala Kent]

Yo, I like this.

[Tom Schwartz]

Likey. Yeah, la la likey.

[Lala Kent]

Can I tell you what it reminds me of? Like, if Vic's vapor rub were, like, organic.

[Tom Schwartz]

That's exactly what it's supposed to be. That's exactly what I surmised when I was reading the description, because I love Vicks vapor rub.

[Lala Kent]

So do I.

[Tom Schwartz]

Back when I used to do some bad things, I really liked Vicks.

[Lala Kent]

What do you mean? Sexually? What do you mean?

[Tom Schwartz]

No, it's really fun. If you're rolling on ecstasy. People, like, will sometimes put it under their nose because it kind of, like, enhances your high.

[Lala Kent]

Wow.

[Tom Schwartz]

You never did that?

[Lala Kent]

I put it under my nose, like, pretty much every night.

[Tom Schwartz]

So wait, so you essentially do your dom every night, unknowing? Because it's the same thing.

[Lala Kent]

This is herbal. I've never rolled Before.

[Tom Schwartz]

Oh, it's.

[Lala Kent]

I've never done drugs.

[Tom Schwartz]

Oh, wow. Yeah, I experimented a lot when I was younger, but, yeah, the.

[Lala Kent]

The highest point of drug use for me was some mushrooms.

[Tom Schwartz]

And that's a great place to. To plateau.

[Lala Kent]

To start and end.

[Tom Schwartz]

Yes. Wait, I'm gonna try this.

[Lala Kent]

Okay.

[Tom Schwartz]

Oh, yeah, that's lovely.

[Lala Kent]

It's lovely.

[Tom Schwartz]

That is really nice. Yeah. You guys, by the way, if you ever. If you ever get motion sickness or, like, drowsiness or, you know, you feel kind of sick on a plane, it's also.

[Lala Kent]

Yeah, dude, this is. This is good.

[Tom Schwartz]

It's very calming.

[Lala Kent]

And it's almost like it's a tea bag. Yeah, right. These are like leaves.

[Tom Schwartz]

I would tell you exactly what's in there right now. Okay, let me see.

[Lala Kent]

Highly recommend.

[Tom Schwartz]

What is in there Here, do you.

[Lala Kent]

Want another sniff or should I lit it up?

[Tom Schwartz]

I think we're good. Let's lit it up. It's got all kinds of good stuff in there, you guys. I'll post it in the intro.

[Lala Kent]

You should post it because it's very nice.

[Tom Schwartz]

I feel nice.

[Lala Kent]

And you're not gonna know what's in it because it's all in it.

[Tom Schwartz]

Clear.

[Lala Kent]

It's that tag.

[Tom Schwartz]

I think it's got some eucalyptus in there.

[Lala Kent]

It's very, like, camper spot.

[Tom Schwartz]

Yeah. I feel like we're in the spa right now. Wait, this is. This is actually a nice segment.

[Lala Kent]

Wow, really? Thank you for bringing this. That was very nice.

[Tom Schwartz]

You can keep it. Lala. I brought you this too, but thanks.

[Lala Kent]

It's probably better for me than the Vicks.

[Tom Schwartz]

That's so funny. Now that we're nice and zenned out, can we. Can we zoom in? Can we go back in time for a second?

[Lala Kent]

Yeah, always.

[Tom Schwartz]

Can we go back in time like maybe. Maybe like eight years? Little vintage vpr.

[Lala Kent]

Okay, yeah.

[Tom Schwartz]

Memory lane, that at math.

[Lala Kent]

Where would that put us?

[Tom Schwartz]

Right when you got on the show?

[Lala Kent]

Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah, that would be okay.

[Tom Schwartz]

I don't think I've ever asked you this. I was wondering what you were like and what you were doing right before you got on Vanderpump Rules. Were you auditioning? Were you acting? Were you. Were you just chilling? What were you up to?

[Lala Kent]

Hmm. I like to think that I was out here busting my ass, but truly, like, for money, I would just fit model. I would drive to downtown LA and very hungover most of the time and, like, change between 75 and 100 times a day. And they only had the fit models work for four hours. And I was like, no, Like, I can do an eight hour day. And they were like, are you sure it's grueling. I was like, yes. I. When I first started Tom, they were paying me $40. By the time I was done, it was 150 an hour.

[Tom Schwartz]

Yeah, fit modeling usually pays between 100 and 200 an hour. It's a great gig, but it's a grind. And you sweat.

[Lala Kent]

Oh, I hated it.

[Tom Schwartz]

Lala. How much do you sweat?

[Lala Kent]

It's a lot of sweating. I mean, like, just not. It was great. It was a great gig. It made it so that I didn't have to go and like get another job. I could pay my bills, have so much fun every single night.

[Tom Schwartz]

Yeah.

[Lala Kent]

I was like, what was I doing? I was like having the time of my life.

[Tom Schwartz]

You were just live, laugh, love and letting it rip. You were kind of YOLO mode.

[Lala Kent]

Yolo. I was like, I was down to fuck. Like I would go to clubs and like take home the fucking door guy. I was 23, living in LA, the first time ever being without my family and my parents, with my best friend who I'd known since childhood. So I was so comfortable. Yeah, it was like just drinking from the time we woke up till the time we went to bed. Like Wednesdays, we always went to Warwick.

[Tom Schwartz]

I. We probably rubbed shoulders there.

[Lala Kent]

Yeah. I'd never said no to anything. It was so cool.

[Tom Schwartz]

Yeah. I mean, is it easy to romanticize that or you're like, thank God I never have to deal with that again.

[Lala Kent]

No, I think my version of heaven when we die is you get to go back to all of your funnest times.

[Tom Schwartz]

I love that.

[Lala Kent]

Yeah. And because you're dead, right? And you get to go back and relive them like nothing. No, none of the stress exists. Like you're just in that moment. Right. That's my version of heaven.

[Tom Schwartz]

So you're kind of just living out your highlight reel.

[Lala Kent]

Exactly. That's what I think we do.

[Tom Schwartz]

That is kind of. That's romantic notion. Yeah, it really. Wait, wait. Actually, can we go back a little bit further?

[Lala Kent]

Always.

[Tom Schwartz]

Just real quick. Okay, one minute. What were you like in high school? Were you. Were you. Did you have sass and spunk? Were you giving them Lala or were you more chill and like introverted?

[Lala Kent]

No, I wasn't introverted.

[Tom Schwartz]

No, I don't see that. I was just curious.

[Lala Kent]

Like, I was very opinionated. Yeah, I was very. I very much the same person. They called me Lala B in high school and I loved that nickname and just, I. I just like Was I had my. My boyfriend and I was 17, so he was like the person that I'd kick it with the most. I was just a badass, you know? Like, now I think I talk too much. I think I have too. I'm too aware of things. I'm like, just lose yourself a bit.

[Tom Schwartz]

I was just gonna say we've all become too self aware because of the constant feedback loop of being online. Yeah, it's nice to check out once in a while.

[Lala Kent]

Yeah. It was like, I had the best time in high school.

[Tom Schwartz]

I love that.

[Lala Kent]

Plus, my boyfriend was hot.

[Tom Schwartz]

Wait, can I get a picture?

[Lala Kent]

Yeah, I'm gonna find one for you.

[Tom Schwartz]

All right.

[Lala Kent]

No, he was very hot.

[Tom Schwartz]

I believe it.

[Lala Kent]

Yeah.

[Tom Schwartz]

What was going through your head, like, right when Vanderpump Rules started? Did you have a game plan?

[Lala Kent]

Like season four?

[Tom Schwartz]

Like, right when you came on board, were you like, okay, I'm gonna run this? Did you have a game plan, an objective, or you just came in, said, yes?

[Lala Kent]

No, I didn't know what I was getting myself into.

[Tom Schwartz]

Same.

[Lala Kent]

I just, like, appeared and it was strange and I was like, I. I was very insecure. And I think that's why I liked drinking so much, is because it kind of made it so that I could become the person that I wanted to be.

[Tom Schwartz]

Totally lowers your inhibitions, brings out that inner rock star, whatever. At least for the short term.

[Lala Kent]

Right. And I was doing all the things that I would do, like, with my friends, and I thought, like, you guys would think I was funny and endearing and you were like my friends from back home, because I would talk the same way to them, but I think I. Maybe it was like, they don't know you. You're coming. Like, they don't think your ass picture is hot or funny. They think you're a skank. So it was just a lot.

[Tom Schwartz]

You came in hot and fiery and. Yeah, man.

[Lala Kent]

Yeah. And then you made an impact. Well, and then instead of when I would kind of push myself onto you. Not you, just the group in general. The moment that I felt like I was not being accepted, it was like, you're mad I took my top off under the waterfall. I'm wearing my ass out tomorrow. Like, I really liked throwing stuff salt into the wound.

[Tom Schwartz]

We were in Rome. When in Rome, you take your top off.

[Lala Kent]

You just do, Right?

[Tom Schwartz]

But c' est la vie.

[Lala Kent]

In hindsight, like, if I had my man, I'd be like, who's this taking her top off?

[Tom Schwartz]

I got so much for that. And I didn't even see your Boobs.

[Lala Kent]

What a waste. Like, I wasn't my. I wasn't the only person with my top off there, but I was the only person that got.

[Tom Schwartz]

I know.

[Lala Kent]

It's fine. It's all good.

[Tom Schwartz]

Well, you. I mean, you had a. You had a decent little run with acting. Do you have any desires, passions left in you to. To act?

[Lala Kent]

You know, Tom, I've had to, like, really admit a lot of shit to myself in the past few years.

[Tom Schwartz]

Oh, man.

[Lala Kent]

Where it's like, did you ever really want to act? And it was like, no. You wanted to be famous. Okay.

[Tom Schwartz]

Love the honesty.

[Lala Kent]

Let's just be honest.

[Tom Schwartz]

Well, I can appreciate the raw honesty in real time here, but I feel like you're selling yourself a little short. I saw your movies. You have some natural talent.

[Lala Kent]

That's very important.

[Tom Schwartz]

And you put work into it. Right. You took some acting classes, didn't you?

[Lala Kent]

Actually, I took a lot of acting classes in Utah.

[Tom Schwartz]

Yeah.

[Lala Kent]

Here's the thing about the acting, and I love doing it, but the way that, like, auditioning works, where there's like 50 auditions just to get you into, like, we're gonna have you meet with the director or the producer and then it's a screen test. It's like by the time it's done, it's like, I never want to do this again.

[Tom Schwartz]

You just said it so perfectly. That is Lala. You encapsulated it. It's like right now. And that's what's so beautiful at this day and age. You're like, I'm gonna do it myself. I'm gonna go buy a camera and I'm gonna. I'm gonna create my movie. I'm gonna produce it, write it, direct it. Kind of like I did with the podcast. Because of course I wanted to turn this. I wanted to turn this into a show someday.

[Lala Kent]

Yeah.

[Tom Schwartz]

And I was like, I'm not going to wait for that day. I'm just going to start.

[Lala Kent]

It just started.

[Tom Schwartz]

Yeah.

[Lala Kent]

And now we live, like, now everybody is a somebody. Right? They're a TikTok star, they're a YouTube star. They're. And it's. It's just different. Like back when I was young and wanting things, like you were either in music or you were into like television and movies. Like, reality TV was not really a thing thing. And if you were on reality tv, like, you were dead in the water, you guys.

[Tom Schwartz]

It was stigmatized. We've talked about this on podcast, off podcast. But back in the day, yes, it could be potentially career ruining. Yes, it was stigmatized. Back in the day.

[Lala Kent]

And now you got Sylvester Stallone, who has a reality show with his family. Alec Baldwin has a reality show with his family. Ashanti and Nelly just launched their reality show.

[Tom Schwartz]

Like I'm saying.

[Lala Kent]

Yeah. It's wild. Right?

[Tom Schwartz]

Well, listen, I. I think there's still.

[Lala Kent]

Hope for you in the acting world.

[Tom Schwartz]

The us, I mean, that is a couple. But as. As a. As actors, actresses.

[Lala Kent]

Okay. And, you know, are you into the acting?

[Tom Schwartz]

Listen, I haven't acted it for a long time. I think I could. The. I. I don't think I would have range. I could play a variation of myself.

[Lala Kent]

Yeah.

[Tom Schwartz]

In almost like a Ryan. I'm not saying I could be as funny as Ryan Reynolds or who I know is not super favorite on the Internet.

[Lala Kent]

He's not even funny.

[Tom Schwartz]

Well, I'm just saying. But he's good at playing a version. A heightened version of himself. I could play some variation. Extension of myself, I think.

[Lala Kent]

No, I think you would be much funnier. Like every time he tries to be funny, and I'm talking about in movies, he comes off as a dick.

[Tom Schwartz]

He's like, snarky.

[Lala Kent]

Yeah. It's like that. You're not being. Did you ever see the Proposal?

[Tom Schwartz]

Yeah. Yeah.

[Lala Kent]

Who was the woman in it again? Oh, I love blinking. She's so hot.

[Tom Schwartz]

She's so good in everything.

[Lala Kent]

She was in the blind side. Miss Congenial Seniality. And I'm totally speed.

[Tom Schwartz]

Sandra Bullock.

[Lala Kent]

There we go.

[Tom Schwartz]

Speed did it for me, dude.

[Lala Kent]

He was not cute or endearing in that he was a dick.

[Tom Schwartz]

Yeah, I know. I know.

[Lala Kent]

But anyways, I like the other Ryan better.

[Tom Schwartz]

One of my favorite shows. Before I moved to la, I used to watch old episodes on Bravo of Inside the Actor Studio. Those are my favorite. I like those. Honestly. Inspired me to make the leap out to la. I loved it. It's a. It's so. So James Lipton. Have you ever watched it?

[Lala Kent]

Yes, of course.

[Tom Schwartz]

He would bring on different actors. And then at the end, there was this questionnaire by Bernard Pavo and he did with every actor.

[Lala Kent]

Yeah.

[Tom Schwartz]

And there was always iconic people on stage with him. I think you're iconic. By the way, let's say a nice shout out to the late, great James Lipton. He passed away. I don't know if you know this.

[Lala Kent]

I didn't know that.

[Tom Schwartz]

But I love the questionnaire he did. And I kind of put a little remix on it.

[Lala Kent]

Okay.

[Tom Schwartz]

And I do think you're iconic. So if you're okay with it, can we do it?

[Lala Kent]

Yeah.

[Tom Schwartz]

Oh, hell yeah.

[Lala Kent]

This Is your pot. I'm just down for the cause.

[Tom Schwartz]

Okay, ready? Okay, here we go. What is your favorite way to relax? To detox?

[Lala Kent]

Oh, a shower, a bath.

[Tom Schwartz]

Yes, I'm right there with you. Okay, so you're sober now.

[Lala Kent]

Yes.

[Tom Schwartz]

But if you could only pick one vice the rest of your life, what would it be? It could be diet.

[Lala Kent]

In this universe, am I not sober?

[Tom Schwartz]

It's whatever you want. Yeah. Yes. In this. In this universe.

[Lala Kent]

In this universe, I have. I'm a normie. I have no drinking problem.

[Tom Schwartz]

Yes.

[Lala Kent]

I would do vodka sodas and a vape. Yeah.

[Tom Schwartz]

Okay. First job.

[Lala Kent]

First job.

[Tom Schwartz]

First job ever.

[Lala Kent]

My first real job. I basically worked in a cubicle and would call old folks homes and ask their patients or their clients or whatever how the experience was. That's what I. That was my first real job.

[Tom Schwartz]

With, like, a wellness check, too.

[Lala Kent]

No, it would be like, hi, this is blah, blah, blah. I won't say the name of. Because I was not great at my job. And I would say, like, go through a questionnaire, like, was nurse so and so nice. And they would rate this place.

[Tom Schwartz]

Okay.

[Lala Kent]

And then, like, it would. These things would go to the old folks home and it would be like, hey, this company gave your old folks home a 4.7 out of 5. Like, oh. So people look at that and they send their old granny there. It was the most horrendous job I've ever had in my life.

[Tom Schwartz]

Well, that's the next question. What was your worst job?

[Lala Kent]

That job right there. I was like, I'm going back to la.

[Tom Schwartz]

Okay. Who was your first kiss?

[Lala Kent]

Oh, my first kiss.

[Tom Schwartz]

Or when? If you're not comfortable saying their name.

[Lala Kent]

I. I won't say their name because I won't out him like this. But he was much older than me. I don't know how this happened.

[Tom Schwartz]

You don't have to say his name.

[Lala Kent]

He was 18 and I was only 15, and I don't know where he is now, but knowing that I'm a grown woman with children now, I would have that man's head on a platter.

[Tom Schwartz]

Yeah, that's trouble.

[Lala Kent]

I didn't tell my mom. That's obvious.

[Tom Schwartz]

Problematic.

[Lala Kent]

Very problematic.

[Tom Schwartz]

Okay, all right, all right. Let's. Let's. Let's go a little more positive here. What turns you on creatively, spiritually, or emotionally?

[Lala Kent]

What turns me on creatively? I love doing my podcast. I really love doing the podcast. I love creating, like, thinking about show ideas that, like, really turns me on. And once you get the train moving, it's like, oh, we're up now. What was the other one? Spiritually.

[Tom Schwartz]

Yeah. Or emotionally? It can. It doesn't have to.

[Lala Kent]

My kids. My kids turn me on. Is that. Can I say that? Is that weird?

[Tom Schwartz]

It has no sexual.

[Lala Kent]

Okay. Looking at my kids. Because I feel. I feel hope and innocence and protection, and it's the one. Not the one time. But when I question everything, like, what is this life? What is this all for? Where I go, you know what? There's someone upstairs. Like, whatever that person or man or whatever it is, looks like these kids are letting me know like, someone exists.

[Tom Schwartz]

Okay, what. What turns you off?

[Lala Kent]

What turns me off? Plans. I hate plans. What turns me on is canceling plans.

[Tom Schwartz]

All right, what's your favorite curse word? So good.

[Lala Kent]

So good.

[Tom Schwartz]

Let's just both say it.

[Lala Kent]

I also love see you next Tuesday, but I don't use it as often in public because people get very offended.

[Tom Schwartz]

I know. Overseas, like, if you're in, like, let's just say, Australia, they use it very liberally.

[Lala Kent]

I know. And I feel right at home.

[Tom Schwartz]

Come have a babe with me. You can't. I don't know if you can say that. Can we say that? I don't know.

[Lala Kent]

See, it's your podcast. You do you.

[Tom Schwartz]

You guys didn't hear that? Okay, I gotta go. What sound or noise relaxes you?

[Lala Kent]

The sound of Jerry Seinfeld's voice. My favorite.

[Tom Schwartz]

What's the deal with Ovaltane? The mug's around, the jewel is around. Why don't they call it rounding?

[Lala Kent]

Oh, no, wait. That's not even his joke.

[Tom Schwartz]

I know.

[Lala Kent]

That's Banya.

[Tom Schwartz]

I know.

[Lala Kent]

He can't stand Banya.

[Tom Schwartz]

It's gold, Jerry. That's gold. All right, what sound or noise do you hate?

[Lala Kent]

Oh, my God. I hate the noise of, like, a yapping dog over and over again. Love dogs. Can't say I love that noise.

[Tom Schwartz]

No, but everyone.

[Lala Kent]

Anything that's repetitive, I lose my.

[Tom Schwartz]

No. Yeah, it's. It's torture.

[Lala Kent]

I come into. I become a rare, rare version of Lala.

[Tom Schwartz]

I would take bullets. I'm not just one. Multiple bullets for my dogs. They are my soul mates. But when they're barking for, like, may, let's say, 15 minutes straight, I will lose my mind. But this isn't about me. This is not about me. Okay, well, what line from Bravo VPR do people most remember you by?

[Lala Kent]

Oh, people love the Bambi Eyed Bitch, and they also love the bigger the hoops, the better the blow job, which. Both of those are pretty great.

[Tom Schwartz]

So iconic. Okay, what profession other than Your own. Would you like to attempt?

[Lala Kent]

Oh, I would love to attempt being like. Like a singer or a drummer. Just some, like, musically talented rock star. A rock star, Lala B. I just want one day as Rihanna.

[Tom Schwartz]

Okay. What profession would you not like to ever attempt?

[Lala Kent]

I don't think I could clean a sewer. Like, when I say plumbers do God's work, I am obsessed with them.

[Tom Schwartz]

Yeah. Shout out to all the plumbers out there.

[Lala Kent]

Yeah.

[Tom Schwartz]

Yeah.

[Lala Kent]

Gangsters.

[Tom Schwartz]

Everybody with trades and skills. Real life app. Yeah, Real life skills.

[Lala Kent]

Real life. They save my life daily. I'm forever grateful. That's also how I know God is real.

[Tom Schwartz]

That's beautiful, Lala. And finally, if heaven exists, we hope it does, what would you like to see is your first meal and drink waiting for you at the Pearly Gates? Doesn't have. I don't doesn't mean alcoholic, but just first meal, first beverage.

[Lala Kent]

Oh, first meal, first beverage, the first meal. I. I love Greek food. So I would want a fat fucking euro and obviously a vodka soda. Duh. Like I'm sober on this planet. Once we exit here, we're off to the fucking races.

[Tom Schwartz]

Like you said, in heaven, we're just living our highlight reel with no consequences.

[Lala Kent]

There's no such thing as alcoholism in heaven.

[Tom Schwartz]

Yeah.

[Lala Kent]

Or hangovers.

[Tom Schwartz]

Lala, wait. This has been so fun. Any parting words you want to leave with our audience? My audience?

[Lala Kent]

No, I'm just so happy that you had me on your podcast.

[Tom Schwartz]

This is nice.

[Lala Kent]

It's great.

[Tom Schwartz]

Wait, this is kind of short now. I want to keep talking, but no, let's end it there. I want to end right there. This is perfect time.

[Lala Kent]

A perfect podcast. Congratulations. Love the name of the pod. Love that you have a great voice.

[Tom Schwartz]

Lala, I love you.

[Lala Kent]

I love you too.

[Tom Schwartz]

You're one of my. Even though we don't see each other that much, I love you. And you're a dear friend.

[Lala Kent]

You're a dear friend of mine too.

[Tom Schwartz]

All right, let's tap out.

[Lala Kent]

All right, we're tapping.

[Tom Schwartz]

Bye. So we touched on sobriety. And you know how you can still activate your reward system in your brain, still let loose, have fun without the need drugs or alcohol. Bert. How you doing, brother? We're sitting on my rooftop. I gotta be honest, I was thinking about it two years ago, you were in the deepest pits of despair.

[Bert]

T, how are you, brother?

[Tom Schwartz]

The family wasn't sure. I'm good, thanks, bro. But yeah, just like not long ago, we weren't sure whether or not you were gonna live or survive. Yeah, you were in the Pit of despair, wrestling with addiction. But now look at you, man. You're sitting on my rooftop in Los Angeles. You made the leap of faith.

[Bert]

Yeah, it's.

[Tom Schwartz]

You did the damn thing.

[Bert]

It's really awesome. It's a great, amazing feeling. And number one is I'm glad to be healthy. Health is always first. And I'm very grateful and humbled to be sitting on this rooftop on this beautiful evening with my brother and. And Butters and Gordo.

[Tom Schwartz]

Shout out to Gordo, Butters. And we're on the rooftop. He wanted to sit up here because it's utterly gorgeous. It's magic hour. And. And it's magic that you're sitting in front of me just thinking about reflecting on what you went through. It's a miracle.

[Bert]

God bless.

[Tom Schwartz]

Yeah, God bless that you're sitting here with me. And it's like. I remember down in the kitchen earlier, I was getting ready for my interview with Lala. I just got back. It was amazing. Love, Lala. Shout out to Lala.

[Bert]

Yeah, Lala is great.

[Tom Schwartz]

But I was like, bert, Bert. So, you know, even though you're sober now, you still have a great zest and gratitude for life, maybe even more than when you were drinking. And I was like, so what do you do to let loose and treat yourself? And I liked what you said in the kitchen. You're like, hey, brother, I'm high on life.

[Bert]

Yeah, exactly. I don't know. I am. I'm very grateful. I like getting up early and actually just coming up and looking at the sun. I do prayers every day, morning, midday and night. And it's. It's been a journey. I like saying that. It's been a coming September. September. I'll be at two years sober.

[Tom Schwartz]

I know.

[Bert]

And post surgery, so it's a. It's a great feat.

[Tom Schwartz]

And Bird, it's a beautiful thing. And you're more vibrant than ever.

[Bert]

I am.

[Tom Schwartz]

And it's like, I think the other day and I. Well, first of all, I love that you still come. You're so sociable, you love going out, you're always down for the cause, but you have zero temptation to drink or to relapse. Zero temptation. I just wanted to say I'm proud of you. You.

[Bert]

Yeah. Thank you, Tom. I. I appreciate that a lot. Thank you.

[Tom Schwartz]

I can trust you. I don't need to babysit you. I know. I just, I. I have nothing but faith and conviction. Cuz I've seen you. You come out with. You come with me to the bars, to. Tom. Tom.

[Bert]

Oh, yes.

[Tom Schwartz]

Just where it's insane. These people are trying to buy you drinks, and I. Your. Your resolve is so strong. You have zero temptation. How do you do that?

[Bert]

For me, it's very, very easy. I have great faith, and I. I'm way past that. I can go anywhere. I don't even think about alcohol. I just like meeting new people, having a great time, and enjoying life. It's. It's simple if you think of it. I don't need alcohol to have a good time. As you said, I'm high on life.

[Tom Schwartz]

You're zesty and. Yeah, zesty, you guys.

[Bert]

Yeah.

[Tom Schwartz]

And. And so what? How do you like to treat yourself? You know, you like to. You like to eat good. You like to wake up early? You like to hike? I know you love a good hike. Get those endorphins flowing. I feel like, you know, you. You just love. You're just. You're having gone through what you've went through. Not to put words in your mouth. Just seems like you're just savoring every second of life.

[Bert]

I do. I. I really do like you saying. I like to also push myself. Like, the hikes, I try to go on at least a walk or two a day and go further sometimes, and it's nice to see what I can do. When you are near death, you see it a lot differently and appreciate it a lot more.

[Tom Schwartz]

Yeah. He was knocking on your door, and. Yeah, man. Now it's just. You wake up and you just are like, let's go. What are we doing today? And I love that about you. It's like, for the longest time, you know, you were just barely surviving, and it's really nice to see you thriving, brother.

[Bert]

Yes, T. I appreciate that. And you know me, I'm a people person. I. I was healing for a while, but now that I'm out meeting people and seeing what I'm capable of, it's exciting.

[Tom Schwartz]

It's like a metamorphosis.

[Bert]

Yeah, it is. There's nothing holding me back, so I can do anything I put my mind to. It's a great feeling.

[Tom Schwartz]

Anything is possible, Bart.

[Bert]

It is.

[Tom Schwartz]

Anything and everything is possible. The world is your oyster now.

[Bert]

Exactly. And I've had doctors even say, robert, you're a miracle. So I. Yes, I believe in miracles. And as I strongly always say, I can't stress it enough. Have great faith. And I'm very. There's a lot I want to say, but looking at my brother is, you know, I'm very beyond words. Grateful and humble.

[Tom Schwartz]

Yeah, man.

[Bert]

I love you, bro.

[Tom Schwartz]

I love you, too. I never gave up on you. I never lost conviction or the faith. I just somehow knew or at least hoped. I never lost hope that you were going to make it. And the fact that you're just sitting here with me, looking out at the. The name of these mountains again, the Vertigo Mountains.

[Bert]

Beautiful.

[Tom Schwartz]

Utterly gorgeous. Just enveloped by nature. It's 67 degrees and we might hit TomTom tonight. And I'm just so happy you're here with.

[Bert]

And also to relate to what you said. Tom.

[Tom Schwartz]

Yeah.

[Bert]

Never give up on anything in life and never stop.

[Tom Schwartz]

Never stopping.

[Bert]

Never stop. And there's so much more ahead. And, you know, I'm just grateful to be out here in la and it's a journey, it's a. That keeps going on and I'm better day by day. I'm meeting new people, new experiences and growing. It's just great experience. So the journey is going to continue and I'm very glad to be doing this podcast with my brother.

[Tom Schwartz]

Yeah. This is just the beginning of your new chapter, man.

[Bert]

It is. It's only.

[Tom Schwartz]

Oh, here comes the plane.

[Bert]

This is only chapter one, Burden.

[Tom Schwartz]

Here comes the plane.

[Bert]

Burdens.

[Tom Schwartz]

Bird insisted on doing it outside.

[Bert]

I did, but this one I go by fast. Don't worry.

[Tom Schwartz]

No, it's okay. But I just wanted to check in with you and say that I love you and I'm proud of you and I'm so happy that you're sitting here with me and I'm just really excited for this chapter. Rob Schwab.

[Bert]

Thank you, brother. I appreciate you.

[Tom Schwartz]

What's your Instagram?

[Bert]

RJ Schwa? RJSchwa.

[Tom Schwartz]

Is it cool if anyone who's struggling with addiction or over consumption reaches out to you? Is that cool on your DMs?

[Bert]

Oh, yes, I would love that. I've actually been helping multiple people with going through the same surgery I went through and people that are struggling with drinking and whatnot. So I would welcome that.

[Tom Schwartz]

All right.

[Bert]

I've been helping, so thank you.

[Tom Schwartz]

Well, I love you. We're gonna. We're gonna wrap it up and probably head to West Hollywood, get a little. Tom. Tom. And you guys, thanks for joining us.

[Bert]

Sounds great.

[Tom Schwartz]

Brother of Detox Retox. Heavy on the Detox today, Bert. I love you.

[Bert]

Love you, brother. Love you, Tom.

[Tom Schwartz]

Let's go.

[Bert]

Let's go, bro.

[Tom Schwartz]

Thank you for tuning in to another episode of Detox Retox with your host, me, Tom Schwartz. You guys, my heart is full. I really enjoyed that episode. I loved sitting down with Lala, trying something new. Yadam, by the way, if you ever get a chance to go to Thailand, it is utterly gorgeous. The best food I've ever had in my life. Also wanted to give a little shout out to my brother Robert. I'm so happy you're still here with us. Love you, brother Lala. You made me laugh a lot. Lala. You know what she reminds me of? The theme song for Reba. You remember that? How's it go? Who am I is who I want to be. A single mom who works too hard, who loves her kids and never stops with gentle hands and a heart of a fighter. She's a survivor. All right. Anyways, you guys, this has been fun. Thanks for all the love and positive feedback. I see you guys. I appreciate you. So we're just getting started. All right. I'm tuning out. Until next time. Love you guys.

[Lala Kent]

Detoxification complete.

[Tom Schwartz]

What is dedication? The thing that drives me every day.

[Bert]

As a dad is Dariana.

[Tom Schwartz]

We call him Day Date for short. Every day he's hungry for something, whether it's attention, affection, knowledge. And there's this huge responsibility in making sure that when he no longer under my wing that he's a good person. I want him to be able to.

[Bert]

Sit back one day and go, we worked together.

[Tom Schwartz]

We did a good job. That's dedication. Find out [e-mail] brought to you by the U.S. department of Health and Human Services and the Ad Council.