From Kitchen Worker to Sold-Out Shows: An Immigrant's Rise | Jiaoying Summers DSH #898

Summary

Summary of "Digital Social Hour" Episode #898: From Kitchen Worker to Sold-Out Shows: An Immigrant's Rise | Jiaoying Summers

In this compelling episode of the Digital Social Hour podcast, host Sean Kelly engages in a vibrant and candid conversation with Jiaoying Summers, the world’s only Chinese comedian. Jiaoying shares her remarkable journey from working in a kitchen as an immigrant to achieving sold-out shows and establishing a thriving career in comedy. The episode offers deep insights into her personal struggles, cultural challenges, entrepreneurial spirit, and the strategies that propelled her to success.

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1. Overcoming Cultural and Familial Pressures

Jiaoying opens up about the intense pressures of being an Asian immigrant in the United States, emphasizing the high expectations placed upon her by her family. She describes the anxiety and stress stemming from the pursuit of academic excellence and prestigious careers.

Jiaoying Summers [00:51]: “Ivy League or bust. You are not Ivy League, you should die.”

This quote underscores the extreme familial pressure to achieve traditional markers of success. Jiaoying discusses her tumultuous relationship with her mother, highlighting how she often had to use money as a means to mitigate conflicts.

Jiaoying Summers [02:06]: “I just give her money. Just give her money. She counts the cash, meanwhile, she’s okay, and I leave before she punches me.”

Her candid portrayal of familial dynamics provides a raw and honest look into the challenges faced by many immigrant families.

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2. The Leap into Comedy

Jiaoying’s transition from a kitchen worker to a comedian was not straightforward. She credits director John Singleton for encouraging her to pursue stand-up comedy, recognizing her potential despite her initial struggles.

Jiaoying Summers [15:17]: “He said, you should try to stand up. You’re gonna be a star.”

Her first open mic performance was a daunting experience where she felt she failed miserably.

Jiaoying Summers [17:07]: “I was doing 10 hours a day because I know I suck. I got better, obviously, but I don’t want to be like, oh, it was great. No, I was not. It was disgusting.”

Despite the setbacks, Jiaoying’s relentless work ethic and perseverance fueled her improvement and eventual success in the comedy scene.

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3. Navigating the Comedy Industry

As a female comedian in a male-dominated industry, Jiaoying faced significant challenges. She discusses the competitive nature of comedy and the difficulties of maintaining authenticity while appealing to a diverse audience.

Jiaoying Summers [27:25]: “When you don't speak English, you really have an advantage.”

Her decision to invest in her own comedy club was a strategic move that allowed her to perform daily, refine her craft, and build a loyal audience base.

Jiaoying Summers [42:04]: “I bought myself a club. I love comedy so much I bought myself a club.”

This entrepreneurial spirit not only provided her with a platform to perform but also with a space to mentor and support other comedians.

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4. Personal Life and Relationships

Jiaoying shares intimate details about her personal life, particularly her experiences with dating and relationships in Los Angeles. Her assertive personality and cultural expectations often complicate her romantic endeavors.

Jiaoying Summers [05:37]: “I don’t have the position to pick and choose.”

She candidly discusses the challenges of dating as a single mother and a comedian, highlighting the balance she strives to maintain between her personal and professional life.

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5. Cultural Insights and Perspectives

Throughout the conversation, Jiaoying provides valuable insights into the cultural differences between China and the United States. She touches on topics such as beauty standards, family expectations, and societal norms, offering a nuanced perspective on navigating life as an immigrant.

Jiaoying Summers [37:15]: “Money is important when you don't talk about money, it just sounds weird to me. I don’t understand.”

Her observations highlight the clash between traditional values and modern American cultural practices, illuminating the complexities of assimilation and identity.

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6. Business Ventures and Achievements

Jiaoying’s entrepreneurial endeavors extend beyond comedy. She discusses her investment in her comedy club and her ongoing negotiations for larger projects, including a one-hour special.

Jiaoying Summers [42:07]: “I have the 30 minutes on Peacock. We are doing my one hour right now with a few networks. I'm just debating which one I should go with.”

Her proactive approach and strategic investments demonstrate her commitment to sustaining and expanding her career in entertainment.

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7. Future Plans and Legacy

Looking ahead, Jiaoying expresses her ambition to become the "queen of comedy," emphasizing her dedication and unwavering work ethic. She plans to expand her reach internationally, with a massive tour scheduled to take her across America and beyond.

Jiaoying Summers [27:16]: “One day I will become the queen of comedy because I'm a Chinese woman.”

Her vision reflects her determination to leave a lasting impact on the comedy landscape, inspiring future generations of comedians, especially those from underrepresented backgrounds.

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Notable Quotes with Timestamps

• Jiaoying Summers [00:51]: “Ivy League or bust. You are not Ivy League, you should die.”
• Jiaoying Summers [02:06]: “I just give her money. Just give her money. She counts the cash, meanwhile, she’s okay, and I leave before she punches me.”
• Jiaoying Summers [15:17]: “He said, you should try to stand up. You’re gonna be a star.”
• Jiaoying Summers [17:07]: “I was doing 10 hours a day because I know I suck. I got better, obviously.”
• Jiaoying Summers [27:25]: “When you don't speak English, you really have an advantage.”
• Jiaoying Summers [42:07]: “I have the 30 minutes on Peacock. We are doing my one hour right now with a few networks.”

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Conclusion

Jiaoying Summers’ story is a testament to resilience, cultural navigation, and entrepreneurial spirit. From overcoming familial pressures and cultural barriers to establishing herself as a successful comedian and business owner, she embodies the immigrant’s drive to succeed against the odds. Her insights offer valuable lessons for aspiring entrepreneurs and professionals seeking to thrive in today’s fast-paced, ever-evolving digital world. This episode of the Digital Social Hour not only highlights Jiaoying’s personal and professional journey but also provides inspiration and actionable strategies for listeners aiming to achieve their own goals.

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Listeners who haven’t tuned in can gain a comprehensive understanding of Jiaoying Summers’ inspiring rise, her unique perspective on cultural challenges, and her unwavering dedication to her craft. The episode is a blend of humor, honesty, and motivational insights, making it a valuable resource for anyone looking to navigate the complexities of personal growth and professional success in the digital age.

Transcript

[A]

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[B]

It's tough being an Asian going to school.

[A]

It's very hard.

[B]

A lot of anxiety.

[A]

Yeah. It's very. It's hard to be Asian.

[B]

Ivy League or bust.

[A]

Yeah. You are not every big. You should die.

[B]

Yeah. Doctor, lawyer.

[A]

Yeah. Or die.

[B]

Yeah. So were you fighting with your mom a lot?

[A]

I just give her money. Just give her money.

[B]

Just paid her off.

[A]

She. She count the cash. Meanwhile, she's counting, she's okay, and I leave before she punch me.

[B]

All right, guys, Jing Summers, first Chinese comedian on the show and only Chinese comedian in the world, right?

[A]

Yeah. I'm so excited. I killed all of them. So I'm the only one.

[B]

Yeah, you're the only funny one. Thank God Chinese people got to step it up.

[A]

I know. That's true.

[B]

Come on, now.

[A]

I'm very happy to be here. I came here for you.

[B]

Wow. I'm honored. Yeah, it means a lot. And you brought your mom.

[A]

Well, yeah, I just. She was driving for me.

[B]

Okay. Yeah. You shoved her in the back. I don't know where she went.

[A]

I don't know. Hopefully she's not here anymore. I don't want her to be here.

[B]

You get your humor from her?

[A]

No, my father. But she beating me really helps.

[B]

Damn.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Yeah. My mom used to slap me, too. On the face.

[A]

It's important.

[B]

Yeah. Piano, Right? Piano. And bad grades.

[A]

Yeah. I. I get a minus. She beat me.

[B]

Yeah. It's tough being an Asian going to school.

[A]

It's very hard.

[B]

A lot of anxiety.

[A]

Yeah. It's. It's very. It's. It's hard to be Asian.

[B]

Ivy League or bust.

[A]

Yeah. You're not Ivy League. You should die.

[B]

Yeah. Doctor, lawyer.

[A]

Yeah. Or die.

[B]

Yeah. So were you fighting with your mom a lot?

[A]

I just give her money. Just give her money.

[B]

Just paid her off.

[A]

She. She count the cash. Meanwhile, she's counting. She's okay. Then I leave before she punched me.

[B]

So you paid her off?

[A]

Yeah, I paid her off. Money, money, money. Money is important.

[B]

Little hush money.

[A]

Yeah. It's important that, like, the Asian moms hate you when you are not a doctor, lawyer, but when you can start making money, they don't care. You can be. You can be a stripper. They don't really care that I got my daughter, you know?

[B]

Yeah. Amazing Asian parents like to compare their kids with each other.

[A]

No. All day my mom's like, keep telling me, why are not mixed.

[B]

Mixed.

[A]

Mixed like the mixed. Yeah, mixed kids are cute, right? They are so pretty, so tall. Why you're not mixed? I'm like, you, the Chinese. My mom, that's not really my fault.

[B]

Does she want you to date a mixed guy?

[A]

No, she want me to date a guy who's tall and handsome and young, my age and successful. I'm like, they are gay or married. All the guys you want me to date is garrid. Like, I. I'm a female comedian. I'm a single mom. Like, I am the least desirable woman on the market. Nobody want a woman who's opinionated, who cannot keep our hormones shut. You know, like, I'm not in demand. I should take anything that's gonna take me, you know, I. I don't have the position to pick and choose.

[B]

Plus, you're in la, right?

[A]

Oh, I'm a four in la. It's not easy. It's hard. Everybody's hot there, dude.

[B]

Yeah. They are known for being attractive there.

[A]

Yeah. It's not okay. Yeah, it's. It's been. Dating has been hard for me and I. I don't know what to do.

[B]

Sorry to hear that.

[A]

It's okay. It's okay. I am just focusing on my work.

[B]

Okay.

[A]

I'm distracted. This is nice.

[B]

Nice, right? It's a pyramid to connect us spiritually.

[A]

It's beautiful.

[B]

Yeah, it's nice. Damn. You use the apps or you use matchmakers?

[A]

Apps sucks. All the guys I met on the app, first of all, I invite them to my show. I'm like, I'm crazy. I want you to know it. This is not gonna get better. I don't want to be, like, pretend to be a nice girl and sweet and cute. They're like, why? You're, like, different now. I'm like, this is who I am. And then they pretend to be okay. But eventually they want love bomb me.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

I can feel love bombing. It's like you don't even know me, you know, like you don't miss me. We know each other for like two days. I miss you. I don't know why, it's just like guys like in LA especially people are so vain and like one person, people are like successful like you. Those people are like fine, cool. But most of the people like, they want to be there. They are not there. So they want to feel the rush of excitement of success. See success. They want to love bomb somebody who they think is desirable and they want that person to love them back.

[B]

Right?

[A]

And they want that feeling to be validated by somebody who's desirable. The moment that you lost somebody back, they're like, bye. Because next target.

[B]

Damn. They ghost you.

[A]

Yeah. Because they don't have anything else happening in their life.

[B]

Wow.

[A]

All the joy and thrill is from getting validation from I think the upset sex that is desirable that they, they can never get. They would go for somebody that would never date them. That's why I don't want to give any sympathy anymore. Because why? It doesn't like, it's just, it's not, it's not now. It's not working. I'm just like, oh, none, I guess right now.

[B]

No sex right now.

[A]

I just met someone like a, a few months ago where we are like us just start dating. But we are taking it really slow.

[B]

Okay.

[A]

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[B]

Right?

[A]

But he doesn't want anything from. Because he's successful. He's fine. He's great comedian. H. No, no comedians you wouldn't date a comedian, I don't think it will be working because if you are funnier than them, they hate you. If you're not, they make fun of you. Isn't there also being a female comedian, it's very hard to date. It's like such a competitive thing because being funny is very alpha. If you go to a room, you make jokes, people laugh. That's alpha move. So it just make the man feel.

[B]

Feel like a simp.

[A]

Yeah, yeah. So they don't. I don't. I don't think a female male comedian can like me.

[B]

That is so true. If my girl was making everyone laugh, I'd be like, damn.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Like, what's my role here? Yeah, that should be my job.

[A]

Yeah. I think it just. It's very hard to date as a female comedian. It's very hard. And I understand women don't want us. It's okay.

[B]

Wow, the struggles. Yeah. We got to hit up Nikki Glazer. She must be struggling out here then.

[A]

Nikki has a man.

[B]

Oh, she does.

[A]

She her man. I think they getting engaged. She trapped the dick. Some tricks. Those long giraffe legs.

[B]

She is tall with the legs.

[A]

She has. She is legs all day. Like, she has legs. Legs for days. She got legs. She's hot.

[B]

Yeah, Some.

[A]

I love her. She's. She's wonderful. And I found out, like, all of the goats loves me. All shitty little hate me. Like, all the great comedians who's, like, they love me, they value me, they empower me and they bring me on their platforms. But, like, for all those people who are, like, not making it or like, kind of having a bite, they talk about me.

[B]

Wow.

[A]

And because I guess I. Because I move so fast.

[B]

Yeah. You came out of nowhere, Right.

[A]

You hate me. But I bought my own club. I invested I myself to the top. Like, I me, I bought a club for myself. People don't get it. It's like, oh, where you come from? I'm like, I invest in myself.

[B]

Right.

[A]

I paid my dues every day. I work harder than anyone I know. Mainly because I don't speak English.

[B]

You do, though, Kind of.

[A]

What kind of species are you?

[B]

I'm half Chinese.

[A]

Holy.

[B]

Yeah. Half Irish, half Chinese.

[A]

That's Mexican as hell.

[B]

Mexican, really?

[A]

Because if I have Chinese, half white. You don't age and you are suspicious.

[B]

Right?

[A]

Very handsome.

[B]

I am suspicious.

[A]

Very handsome.

[B]

Aquarius.

[A]

People really don't know, like, if you can't even, like, do any racial story in front of you because you don't know which one's going to Trigger you. So you are visually suspicious.

[B]

Wow.

[A]

Is racist approved. Because people can't really say. They can't say chink. They can't say anything.

[B]

Well, I look hella Asian, so people called me chink growing up.

[A]

You look like the boy in crazy rich Asians. Asian one look like you are like Asians after surgery. You are like the K pop boy.

[B]

Okay.

[A]

They all look white with smaller face, big eyes and tall nose. Yeah, that's what Asian one look like. So you look like the hot Asians. I was ugly in China.

[B]

Really?

[A]

You know, I have dark skin that's not desirable. But in America, your skin's not dark if you don't have a tan. You are a broke ho who cannot afford a vacation.

[B]

Right.

[A]

You are shitty. So his beauty standards just really.

[B]

Yeah, it changes. When I went to China, I was 10 years old. All the girls were hitting on me.

[A]

I know.

[B]

I'm talking like 18, 21 year old girls. I know, it was weird.

[A]

They won't breastfeed you?

[B]

No. I was the tallest one there already in fourth grade.

[A]

Being tall, being white and have tall nose and like a double edit surgery is.

[B]

It was nuts. They were asking me for photos.

[A]

Yeah. In fourth grade.

[B]

Dude, it was crazy.

[A]

Everybody's.

[B]

I got no girls out here.

[A]

Are you kidding me? I mean definitely. You got no.

[B]

I left high school a virgin.

[A]

Oh.

[B]

I left college a virgin. Oh, wait. Yeah, my girl's watching this. Yeah, I left college. No, I'm just kidding. I left college a virgin.

[A]

I left the high school version too. For sure. Because you can't really date in China. In high school, it's all about study, study, study. The boys and girls can't even sit together. It's very strict. Yeah.

[B]

So you sat with girls.

[A]

Yeah. And I'm not gay.

[B]

Wow.

[A]

I just. I'm dick serious. I've never been curious. I don't believe in. I mean, I do is powerful. It produces babies and. But like I don't want to be with a woman. I just. Women are too smart. I can't manipulate them. Like, I cannot. There's no way you can't lie to a woman. They figured out they know men. They kind of suspicious. Like when you give a good bj, they forget everything they use. Like what? You know, they don't remember. Men are so easy to manipulate women. They remember two years ago. Like, you can't.

[B]

You can't lie.

[A]

I don't have time for it. I don't. I can't play with a woman.

[B]

You can't lie to them. They'll figure it out.

[A]

They will figure it out every time.

[B]

I've ever tried it.

[A]

I'm a feminist. I don't want to be abusing woman.

[B]

Oh, you're a feminist.

[A]

I had a daughter and I kept her. I mean, okay, that's a lot as a Chinese lady.

[B]

Yeah. One child policy. Damn.

[A]

My dad works in B2B marketing. He came by my school for career Day and said he was a big roas man. Then he told everyone how much he loved calculating his return on ad spend. My friends still laugh at me to this day. Not everyone gets B2B, but with LinkedIn, you'll be able to reach people who do. Get $100 credit on your next ad campaign. Go to LinkedIn.com campaign to claim your credit. That's LinkedIn.com campaign. Terms and conditions apply. LinkedIn, the place to be. To be. Wow. Which one is a Chinese? Which one is Irish?

[B]

My mom's Chinese and my dad's Irish.

[A]

She was a white man. She's Irish. Irish. He's Irish from Ireland or he's.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

So she's. She's. She went to. She went to Europe.

[B]

No, they met here. They met through the newspaper out here.

[A]

Newspaper.

[B]

Yeah. That's how you dated in the 80s or 70s. Whenever they met. I don't know, 90s, maybe 80s.

[A]

90S. Yeah. You are brutal. Yeah. Your mom's like, I'm 35.

[B]

Yeah, she got him. Man.

[A]

That's amazing.

[B]

Yeah. Asian. I was never into Asian girls growing up.

[A]

Were you into them or no? No, because your mommy's maybe.

[B]

My mom always wanted me to date Asian, but also, they. They don't peak till kind of late. So, like, in high school, they're not. Yeah, they're not that attractive in high school, but they get.

[A]

If you are Woody Allen, you would be very attracted to them, right? Let's go.

[B]

Could be. Yeah. I don't know. Dating's a weird thing. I've been in the same relationship for seven years now, though.

[A]

Wow. Congrats. Seven years is a long time.

[B]

I know.

[A]

We're in Vegas.

[B]

Three and a half.

[A]

How. How big is the ring?

[B]

Two carats. Nothing too crazy.

[A]

Nice.

[B]

How big's yours?

[A]

This is. I don't have a ring anymore. I sold it after my divorce because I got no money.

[B]

Damn.

[A]

But this is real diamond. And it's okay. It's not the engagement. Nobody is gonna put a ring on this.

[B]

You don't want to get married again?

[A]

I do, but nobody wants to marry me. And it's okay.

[B]

I understand what's the minimum carrot size they would need.

[A]

Depends. If you have big dick, you have a smaller ring. If you're dick small, honey, you better.

[B]

Like what's considered small for you some more, deck.

[A]

Four inches.

[B]

Okay. That's reasonable.

[A]

We like. I'm like, I can do better.

[B]

Some girls have crazy standards.

[A]

Yeah. Too big is not like. No, I don't need too big.

[B]

Okay.

[A]

Too big is like. It's not. Okay.

[B]

What's too big? Like nine. Yeah, nine's too big. So the sweet spot's like six. Seven. Boyfriend dick, they call it.

[A]

Yeah, that's cute. What is like eight?

[B]

Eight? Eight's pretty big. Damn. So you want that?

[A]

I mean, I wouldn't cry. If it's eight, I will cry. But.

[B]

Tear of joy, have you ever met an Asian that had an eight?

[A]

My ex had a seven.

[B]

Okay.

[A]

He's Chinese.

[B]

Wow.

[A]

It's the biggest Chinese dick. I'm pretty sure.

[B]

Yes.

[A]

And I got it. It just like he. Everything's perfect. That he just like. It wasn't right for each other. Yeah, it was nice. It was nice. I hung my towel on his dick.

[B]

Okay. You still talk to him?

[A]

No, we talk through our lawyer, and whenever he picked the children, he goes through my maid.

[B]

One of those.

[A]

It's okay. I didn't get any money from him. I don't. I don't care. I just wish. I just don't want to. Peace. Peace of mind. Healthy boundary. And I just. I really don't complain, but I just also don't want any drama.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Yeah. If you are not giving me money, don't scream at me. Right? Like, that's the least I can ask for. If I'm not getting money from you, don't scream at me.

[B]

Fair enough. Did you meet him in China?

[A]

Yes. I was hosting this Shanghai film festival, and then how we met. Yeah, that's. We met. It was romantic.

[B]

So before comedy?

[A]

Before. Yeah, before comedy.

[B]

Wow.

[A]

2017, before I was doing my first open mic.

[B]

So what caused you to jump into comedy?

[A]

John Singleton. Oh, he just. He's a director. Did the Boys in the Hood.

[B]

Yeah, I saw that one.

[A]

Black. He's black.

[B]

Okay.

[A]

And I auditioned for his TV show. Rebel is a police drama about a black girl who's a. Who's a police. Who's a cop. And her best friend is a Chinese girl who knows kung fu. It happened in Oakland, and they want me to have an Oakland accent. And I didn't have it. It's. Yeah, it's like, black girl, black girl, Chinese girl, kung fu, police. Drama is like rush hour on a budget. I was pretty close. John really liked me, like, my performance, but he was not happy with my accent. But he said, you should try to stand up. You're gonna be a star. I'm gonna do another job now. He goes, hell, no. Leave. So try my first open mic. After that, I sucked. It was bad. It was shitty. I look at this, and that's why I feel like being a Chinese lady. Having abusive mom is like. It's very useful because you don't like. You don't sugarcoat. It's bad. It's bad. And it's important to know when you're bad, when you know you are bad. You don't get depressed when people tell you, you're ugly. Look, you're ugly, or like, hey, you're fat, it's okay. But I just feel like being. Having a Chinese mom help us be like, that sucks. I suck. And it's okay, I'll do better. So I went on stage. I don't remember what I said, and I feel like I was getting hit by a car. Like a. During highlight. And I remember people were like, somebody should not be doing comedy. That's disgusting. Like, learning English first, you know? And I got off stage, I knew it was bad, and I went to the bar. I had vodka shots. You know, I'm like, okay, let's do something about this. So I bought my club next month.

[B]

Wow. The next month.

[A]

So first open mic three weeks later, about my club. So I was doing 10 hours a day because I know I suck. I got better, obviously, but I don't want to be like, oh, it was great. No, I was not. It was disgusting. Like, getting over the fear of speaking public. Trying to tell a joke is already a thing. Like, getting over that is a lot of work, right? Going to be funny at the moment is the next level. Like, it's something like, people don't understand that they are so fragile. I mean, in American culture, you can. You can be tough. You have to give them, like, give them soft. And I don't believe in that. I think that's why people are pussies now. And they. They take all the drugs and the. The PC culture, you can't say. You can't say somebody, hey, you're fat, but you can tell. Like, hey, you have a drinking problem. Why? It's the same thing. You cannot control your love of a substance. You love food too much, and you love alcohol too much. It's the same thing. There's nothing shameful or like, it's it's bad when you tell a short guy you are a short king. That's abusive. Because when you are a fat, you can lose weight. When you're short, there's nothing you can do about it. It's like a 10, a girl. Hey, you're fat. You're a Dairy Queen. No, right? That would be wrong. You're facing me. How about short shaming fat? You are lazy. You can't control yourself. You are weak but short. He is born that way.

[B]

Right.

[A]

You know, I just feel like people are just like, there's nothing wrong being fat. Like in China in the Tang Dynasty, being fat is the beauty standard. When you are fat means you are rich, you have food. So being like a. Being fat and it's just like sexy and beautiful. So it's really like an. I just don't think a fat is ugly. It's not. It's just like right now, let's just be honest. The most guy like skanky, skinny. And that's what they do. They like skinny with big titty, big titties. And that's what they do. And it's fine. There's guys like fat girls. It's all fine. But if it's to a point, that is a health concern. I just don't think it would be like a taboo to say, hey, maybe you should, you know, drink less. Maybe you should eat less. Yes, it's unhealthy. But that's like, oh, you are fashioning. I think it's so weak.

[B]

It's weak. Yeah. Right? My Asian mom was super honest with me growing up.

[A]

Yeah. She'll tell your friends they are fat, right?

[B]

Oh, yeah. Yeah.

[A]

Like, it just. I don't think it's bullying. It's just that we have tiny eyes, but we can see and whatever we are seeing is what we're seeing.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Like last night, my mom was like, don't have dinner. I'm like, what? She goes, you're getting fat. Don't have dinner. You know, you are single. You don't. You can't afford to be fat because likelihood is like, you're gonna get a man if you lose more weight.

[B]

Yeah. She would determine my girlfriends for me.

[A]

She will tell you which one is ugly, right?

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Tell me, like, what is the first girlfriend? She. We bring a girlfriend home.

[B]

Yeah, I brought her home. She was like, what the. She didn't like her. She was on drugs and stuff too. So that makes sense.

[A]

The girlfriend's on drugs.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Mom can tell.

[B]

Yeah, she's a she's. Sharp.

[A]

Yeah, she's sharp.

[B]

So, yeah, she would. She would have a say in my friends and my dating life.

[A]

Well, it turned out she's doing a good job. Because you are so successful now.

[B]

Yeah, I'm super selective with my friends, and it worked out, but at the time, I hated it. You know, I couldn't bring home certain people. Did your mom do that too?

[A]

Oh, yeah. Yeah. She would just tell my friend that you look like a cheap hooker. Get out of my house.

[B]

Damn. She was that honest.

[A]

Yeah. And one time I forgot my key. I was knocking my door with my friend. We're gonna come home and do my homework. I'm gonna slap me on my face.

[B]

Wow.

[A]

Why did you look? Lose your key? My friend cried and ran away.

[B]

Holy crap.

[A]

Mom's like. I'm like, mom, she's weak. I'm like, that's right. You can't be friends with her. I'm like, I never talk to her anymore. I'm like, why would you run away? Like, if my mom beat me or my friend, you should be there with me running away. Like, a little.

[B]

Yeah. You need to stand up. What about your dad? Was he rough?

[A]

No, he's drunk all the time. I don't remember him. Really rough. He's always drunk.

[B]

Your dad was an alcoholic?

[A]

Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah.

[B]

I didn't know that was an Asian thing. I've never heard of an Asian being an alcoholic.

[A]

I. Me either.

[B]

What was it, Soccer?

[A]

No, baijiu. What is that, like a white liquor? Like a bow tie.

[B]

Okay.

[A]

Yeah, he's always drunk. He's very handsome, though.

[B]

Okay.

[A]

Yeah. My father is gorgeous.

[B]

He's dealing with some stuff, huh?

[A]

Yeah, I love. Yeah, I love. I mean, he is very well read. He read books. He is very knowledgeable, but he's just drunk. Damn drunk his whole life.

[B]

Sounds like my dad.

[A]

He's getting better now.

[B]

My dad used to read a book a day and drink a 30 pack of beer a day.

[A]

Oh, his beer. Beer guy. Mine is like a hot liquor.

[B]

Oh, yeah, those are rough.

[A]

Is that bad?

[B]

Damn. You drink soju?

[A]

It's kind of like a soju. It's a Chinese version of it.

[B]

I like soju.

[A]

So is good.

[B]

Sneaks up on you, though.

[A]

I like warm ones.

[B]

Oh, you like warm. I like the cold soju.

[A]

Oh, nice.

[B]

Yeah, it sneaks up on you.

[A]

We should have a Korean Bible.

[B]

Yeah, Korean barbecue is fun.

[A]

Yeah, we have the meat and the soju. Like, what kind of species?

[B]

Your girlfriend, she's Bolivian and Paraguayan. Latina.

[A]

Oh, I'M seeing a Latino man.

[B]

Oh, yeah? Yeah. Kids are going to be interesting. Same with you. If you have more kids.

[A]

I want more kids.

[B]

You want more?

[A]

Yeah, why not? They're like french fries. Yeah.

[B]

How many you want? Three?

[A]

No, I want to make sure my vagina is still very tight. Two is maximum, but I will do one, I think one because I already have two.

[B]

Did you recover your vagina from the.

[A]

A snap back like this. If I knew it, I would leave my husband right away.

[B]

Oh, wow.

[A]

Cuz we were not in a good shape and I'm like by now my vagina is loose. I just put.

[B]

Damn. It didn't recover it.

[A]

My vagina came back.

[B]

Oh, it did come back.

[A]

It recovered. It's so tight right now. And that's why I trapped this new.

[B]

Nice. Yeah. I heard you could get stem cells now too. If it stays loose for too long, you can tighten it up with stem cells.

[A]

Oh, should it be tighter? I don't know. I think.

[B]

Yeah. Asians already tight.

[A]

I heard very tight. Yeah, I'm very. That's not the department I worry about. It's me, it's their mouth. It's talk.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

That's how I lose, man. My vagina. Snatch them, catch them. My. My mouth opens up and they leave. If I just don't talk. If I just learned to not talk, I'll be married.

[B]

Wow.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

So you got to. You got to study under the monks or something and learn how to meditate maybe.

[A]

Yeah. If I don't talk, I'd be having the best man.

[B]

Wow. You'd be a billionaire probably.

[A]

Oh, yeah. Oh, for sure. She's like, I cannot keep my hormones shot. And that's damn problem. Yeah. Wow.

[B]

So your mouth has gotten you into some situations.

[A]

Yeah, my mouth is the reason why men leave. My is why they stay.

[B]

Wow. Wow. But would you rather have it that way or the other way around?

[A]

I think, I think I. It's hard for me to change because I make a living talking and I really cannot be consistent. I. I'm a piece of on stage and off stage it should be consistent. So I'm waiting for a man who can probably. Who can't really hear, having hearing problems to study me. You know, some. Somehow some man is gonna. I don't know. I have crazy friends, like very, very aggressive, overbearing woman. Really powerful woman. Aggressive. And they still have a nice man like a Judge Judy.

[B]

Some guys don't like to be the alpha.

[A]

Judge Judy's husband and her are very much in love.

[B]

Really? Wow. Yeah. Judge Judy's an alpha.

[A]

Yeah, she's definitely an Alpha. And Jerry is very much in love with her. And when I talked to them and she told me how. How they met, she goes, I spot him at the bar. I walked him. I touched his chin. I'm like, ew, what's your number? He goes, don't touch me. She goes, oh, yeah, I'm touching you. And that's.

[B]

She pursued him.

[A]

Happily married. Married forever.

[B]

Damn.

[A]

Yeah. I want that man. I want my j.

[B]

Are you the pursuer grabbing the dick?

[A]

I'm like, you're mine. I'm. As a Chinese woman, I'm not like, I. I'm kind of very, very, very, very weird combination. I'm very aggressive, very ambitious, very hardworking, very independent. I don't spend men's money. I mean, if you want to buy me shit, I'll just take it, but I'm not. I don't.

[B]

So gifts are not your love language.

[A]

It is, but I buy things for men.

[B]

Okay?

[A]

Like, if you buy it for me, I like it. But if you don't buy it for me, if you are spending time with me, I'm happy. But I'll be buying you. And I don't expect you return your favorite sugar mama. Oh, yeah. Yeah. If you have a good dick, you're gonna get showered with zero legs.

[B]

Wow.

[A]

Like, I don't. Yeah, I just. I just. I love. I love buying men nice things, and that's why I cannot be love bomb, you know? Like, I don't know the difference. And then they waste my time. So I'm very alpha, but sometime I'm very traditional, and I don't want to pursue men. I feel like I try to, like, stop myself when I'm trying. Like, oh, my God. He's okay. Oh, my God. Sure.

[B]

Is there an age limit for you?

[A]

Yeah, 55 is kind of, like, too much.

[B]

Okay, what about the other way?

[A]

I can't do 25. Like, I feel like a pervert. I just feel like I'm breastfeeding them.

[B]

Yeah, 25 is young.

[A]

I can't do 20. 80 is still young for me, but I'll.

[B]

So I'm off the table, then.

[A]

How old are you?

[B]

27.

[A]

You are over 25? Yeah. You'll be fine.

[B]

All right. What do the tattoos mean on your arm?

[A]

It's the Chinese thing. Is. Is that the way of the heaven moves a gentleman? That's sexist. Confucius. Whatever. Gentle woman should work hard. Like, the way the heaven moves and the way that the earth moves a gentleman Or a gentle woman should always have great moral to carry on his success. Her success as well.

[B]

Wow.

[A]

That's trying to be trying not be like. It's about hard working and be a great person. If you are hardworking, you can achieve success. But if you are a shithole piece of shit asshole, you cannot maintain your success. You are going to lose.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

In a long run if you are not a good person.

[B]

Agreed.

[A]

Yes. I try to live by.

[B]

I love that.

[A]

Iing.

[B]

Yeah. Chinese people work damn hard, man.

[A]

Yeah, we do. We do.

[B]

Queen of comedy.

[A]

Yeah. Yeah. Is you manifest? You know, I mean it's aggressive but.

[B]

You'Re chasing the crown.

[A]

Yeah. I mean I will live forever. One day I will become the queen of comedy because I'm a Chinese woman. When they all die, I'll still be on stage in my 90s telling dick jokes about how my is so dry, you know, like maybe I will be the queen of comedy that day.

[B]

Asian people don't age. So you can.

[A]

I can still look.

[B]

Have a long career and look good.

[A]

Yeah, I mean I. I will. I will.

[B]

Yeah, we got that on our side. You got no gray hairs yet?

[A]

Not yet.

[B]

Good.

[A]

Not yet. Because I don't give a. You can't give a. If you do you have gray hair.

[B]

Yep. I agree. And what's the one on your hand? On the right hand.

[A]

So that's the name of the female. The only woman emperor of China in Pang dynasty. She. She was the emperor of Tang dynasty when China was at his best the most prosperous dynasty. She's a woman. She ruled China for over 50 years.

[B]

Okay.

[A]

And she's not a queen. Nobody rules out of her. She's an emperor. And she had a concubines, male concubines.

[B]

What's up?

[A]

That's men concubine. She has like 20 boys like her.

[B]

Oh, like assistant or what?

[A]

Lovers.

[B]

Oh like a damn.

[A]

Like a male. Like you know concubine is when a king has 3,000 concubine. The woman who serve him. She has male concubines who serving. Yeah. Eat her. I mean what.

[B]

That's a full time job?

[A]

Like. Yeah. Cuz the king in china they have 3,000 wives. Right.

[B]

Holy crap.

[A]

She had like a 20 at East Man. Beautiful man who's great with everything.

[B]

What a life.

[A]

I mean nobody is like her. Nobody before, nobody after.

[B]

Damn.

[A]

It's just.

[B]

I mean you're next.

[A]

I want to. This is the name. I don't want that much dick. I'm very conservative when it comes to. I believe in love, which is Disgusting, but I kind of do. So that's the name she gave herself, is pronounced as Zhao. I mean, is the character is. You know, Right. The sun, the moon. Kong is the sky. So she invented character for herself. Is that my power is above the moon and the sun and the sky. It means ultimate power, ambition. So I want to. Whenever something awful happens in my life, I feel powerless. I want this character and her spirit to pump into my blood and give me power and energy. So I don't. This is very hard. I mean, doing this in my second language, as a woman of color and the immigrant all by myself, it's just. It's hard. People hate me. They really do. And I just need to give myself the power, energy to carry on, to just keep doing what I'm doing.

[B]

That's deep.

[A]

I love how much get on the digital social hour. You're here and I'm here.

[B]

I mean, you were with LeBron last week, so.

[A]

Yes.

[B]

I don't think I'm topping that one.

[A]

Yeah, LeBron and LeBron.

[B]

LeBron and Shaw. I'll take it being mentioned.

[A]

How many percentage are you? Are you. Are you black? Like, how many percent?

[B]

I don't. It didn't say. I took a DNA test. It didn't even pop up, so it's super small.

[A]

Okay. Maybe like 2%.

[B]

Yeah, probably like that.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

I'll take it, though.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

You know, being black is cool.

[A]

Oh, yeah. Yeah. Being invited to cookout is fun.

[B]

Yeah. Yeah, absolutely. I can hang. I can eat a lot. I got to see you at the Korean barbecue spot. See if you can keep up with.

[A]

Oh, I eat like a pig.

[B]

Yeah, I just had.

[A]

I just was at Macy Gray's house. She was on my podcast last night, was teaching me how to sing.

[B]

How to sing?

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Nice. You good or no?

[A]

No, I'm. I suck. But she tried to make me like, I. I'm good. She's very sweet.

[B]

Yeah. Singing and dancing. If you. If you have that in your bag, I mean, you're the life of the party, you know?

[A]

I can't sing, but I can drink.

[B]

If you could drink. That's a good party skill.

[A]

Yeah, I drive everybody home after you drunk drive. But I am the soberest of all of them.

[B]

Okay. You could turn a switch, right?

[A]

Yeah, I can turn a switch. Like, I have. My girlfriend's throwing up, passing out. I'm just like, let me drive you home, because I don't want you guys.

[B]

You could hang. That's the Asian in you kicking in.

[A]

Yeah, I just like, okay. I'm like, okay, it's for us to drive. I'm like, okay, that's just like who's going home first? So I was driving already home.

[B]

Right.

[A]

I'm the mom. I don't. I think I have very strong, strong will that really helps me to maintain myself. I guess. Like if I am traveling non stop now, sleep for 24 hours. I had to do a show to a thousand people. I'll be like, okay, we need to reserve energy to come out and just like to do it. So amazingly after that we can pass out. I can do, I can go there and be like, I just woke up from a long sleep. And then after I'm done, I'm done.

[B]

I'm like checked out.

[A]

Checked out. So whenever I need to do something, I behave. I. I perform whenever there's something like a. I got so excited for some big stuff. I'm like, let's sleep. We had to sleep. So I'm like, listen, we had to sleep for three hours and that's all we got. We're going to sleep. I'm going to sleep. I, I don't like lose my sleep. I don't really need any drugs to like calm down. I mean, I'm kind of too crazy to calm down. Too intense. Cuz I don't think I can ever do cocaine because I'm already like on coke.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

I can't picture that actually like me as a person. I'm like, yeah, you're already really energized.

[B]

Is that coffee?

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Okay. So yeah, you're already, you know, really energized.

[A]

Yeah, I don't. I think I can do coke. I tried a mushroom one time.

[B]

Oh, how'd that go?

[A]

It was actually in Vegas at Suji's house. I just, I want to throw up.

[B]

Yeah, I threw up when I did it.

[A]

Yeah, I want to throw up asleep.

[B]

Well, you know why, right? It grows on cow.

[A]

What?

[B]

Mushrooms grow on cow.

[A]

Ew.

[B]

Yeah. So you want to throw up because of that?

[A]

Oh, gross. Is that Asian thing? We just don't know. It's mushroom.

[B]

I just. Now I microdose. I don't do the full doses.

[A]

How much is micro dosing?

[B]

0.25.

[A]

Can I have some?

[B]

I don't have any.

[A]

No, I don't think you do.

[B]

But I got you.

[A]

You are underage. You don't.

[B]

No, I do it. It helps. I'd be curious if you performed on, on some mushrooms. Little microdose.

[A]

I haven't. I should try.

[B]

Yeah, it might work.

[A]

I haven't. I haven't because I just had some at her house and I threw up, so I never tried again.

[B]

How much did you eat?

[A]

I don't know.

[B]

Damn.

[A]

Not much.

[B]

What? A friend right there.

[A]

I don't remember. She. She showed me and I snatched. I just ate it. She goes, stop it. It's just like, you can't do the whole thing. I'm like, I don't feel anything when I start crying and screwing up.

[B]

Okay, so you don't like uppers, you don't like psychedelics. What about downers?

[A]

What's donors?

[B]

Xanax. Anti pain, anti inflammation.

[A]

You mean macadam?

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

I just got my dental work and the doctor gave me one bottle and I had like a half. I'm like, I like to feel the pain. Pain make me feel excited.

[B]

Wow.

[A]

Like. Like, if you don't choke me.

[B]

Oh, sure. You're kinky in bed.

[A]

Oh, yeah.

[B]

Okay.

[A]

I mean, I'm crazy.

[B]

You got a whip?

[A]

No, not that far yet. But it probably. I had to go there one day. But like, I. I like rough sex.

[B]

Damn.

[A]

And romantic sex. If I like a guy, I like everything. If I don't like them, I'm like, come on the wall.

[B]

Leave.

[A]

You know, I'm very romantic.

[B]

Same.

[A]

Yeah, I just like, very romantic. I believe in romance. And that's why it's very hard for me to survive in la. Because, like, if you have like, open relationship.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

They. They like, they had like one night stand or friends with benefits. I can't do that. I'm like, how can I?

[B]

Yeah, there's very little love in la.

[A]

Yeah. Friends with benefits.

[B]

You've never done it?

[A]

No. Yeah, I can't do it.

[B]

I've never done it.

[A]

I just. I don't. It doesn't make me happy. I don't. I don't get turned on. I can't even do a tourism wow. Because somebody's gonna die. Like, I would be like, agree to a threesome. And then like, my boyfriend gonna stop that girl. I'll be like, you are a. I'm gonna, like, beat them up or something.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

I just. I'm so insecure. I can't do it. I'm so, like, romantic. I've been running him. Loves poetry.

[B]

Wow.

[A]

I don't. I can't. I just can't do it. And it's la. Everybody's, like, into three. Yeah.

[B]

I'm surprised you live there.

[A]

I don't know why I live in Arcadia.

[B]

Yeah. Your energy doesn't give me LA vibes. Oh, does it give Manhattan.

[A]

I think so, right. East Coast, Very New York.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

I mean, I'm bicoastal. I stay in New York every month.

[B]

You like the guys over there better?

[A]

No, they don't like me, though. I do like them, but they don't like me. Yeah. I don't. I have this comedian guy who's flirting with me for like two years. I never him because I'm like, he has to earn my. And then when he told me, I love you, next day I found out he's married.

[B]

Whoa.

[A]

I'm like, you gotta be kidding me.

[B]

Damn.

[A]

But I. I mean, I'm not invested because we never had sex. I just. Yeah. I mean, they suck too.

[B]

Wow. Yeah.

[A]

I feel like even men who's attractive and successful, they would always choose to be with a nice, beautiful woman who don't talk.

[B]

Yeah. So here's the thing. A woman's a representation of the man.

[A]

Yeah. Like I would. If a man don't really love me, they would think I'm embarrassing.

[B]

That's what I mean. Yeah. If you say the wrong joke, it doesn't hit with the person.

[A]

Yeah. I was invited to perform for Robert F. Kennedy for his fundraiser early in Beverly Hills. They're like, just be you. We love the way you are. So they want to see my jokes I sent over. They're like, no, you can't. Nah, you can come and eat, but I'm not going on stage. I'm like. So, like, sometimes I regret for me to not tone down a little bit sometimes, like, you know what? I'm a piece of. I have to be consistent.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

You'll find that balance.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Yeah. One more kid. So how are.

[A]

You want the kids?

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

How many?

[B]

Three.

[A]

Cute.

[B]

Yeah. Three kids.

[A]

Are you. Do you have a younger brother and sister?

[B]

Only child.

[A]

Oh, yeah. You won't carry the policy to America.

[B]

Nah, because I was lonely as growing up, like.

[A]

Yeah, it was kind of traumatized because they pray together.

[B]

Exactly. Yeah. I want at least two they could be together because only child. That could go really bad. Like, I could have been a different person. Drug addict or whatever.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

So lonely. You know how it was. You were only child too, right?

[A]

No, I had a younger brother to abuse.

[B]

Oh, wow. So you were mean to them.

[A]

No, they were stupid. It's not really my fault. My sister is, like a little slow, so I beat her when she's not good at math. My brother, you know, hot head, he has a penis. He's a boy, so they like him.

[B]

You couldn't beat him up?

[A]

I don't think he's smart. No, I can beat him, but I don't beat boys.

[B]

Yeah, Asians don't measure. Yeah, it's all about intelligence with Asians.

[A]

Yeah, he's not really smart. It's okay.

[B]

You like China or us better?

[A]

It's different, you know? Like the friendship in China is very different. When you have a real friend, it's like a ride or die. It's like a family. Like, you can talk about money, but in America talking about money is like the taboo.

[B]

Taboo. Yeah.

[A]

And I don't like it because I feel like a. Money is a factor to determine friendships and relationships.

[B]

For sure.

[A]

Love, family. Like I, I support my home family, my grandparents, my grandma, maybe my grandma, grandpa, my father, my mom, my children, even my dog, you know, I mean, I had to feed him cuz you can't starve them because they're feding in la. They're like so important enough. I, I just, I feel like money is important. When you don't talk about money, it just, it sounds weird to me. I don't, I don't understand. And like, you can't borrow money from your friends. You can't lend money to your friends. It's. It's weird in America and there's sharing the bills in, in dating that disgust me. My dries so fast. Like, I'll pay for dinner. I'm. I'm happy to pay for dinner. I can't share the bill. Like, I cannot do it.

[B]

What if it's the first date?

[A]

The man should pay.

[B]

Okay.

[A]

Or like it's a harder one should pay. I should not pay. If, if I am taking Tim out, right? I'll be like, I'm giving you dinner. You are giving me herpes. You know, like.

[B]

Yeah, that makes sense.

[A]

The harder one don't pay. That's what I'm saying. Like, the hotter one should not pay.

[B]

Yeah, I heard girls don't like when you split the bill the first date.

[A]

No, that's like hell no. Yeah, it's like my third date, I paid and I want to, I want to treat him. I took him out to a nice restaurant and I, I pay for it. I'm. I don't want him to pay. So I called ahead to pay it to put my credit card down before he can have a chance. I like, I'm not cheap. I just. As a Chinese woman, I don't want people to be like, we're gonna later, but now we're gonna share the bill. That's disgusting. That is gross. Yeah, my pussy is so dry. Just thinking about it. I'm just, like, so pissed off.

[B]

Damn.

[A]

I don't think you would ever share a bill. The first date.

[B]

I don't think I ever have.

[A]

No, no, you wouldn't do that. The Chinese thing is gonna choke you.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

The Chinese ancestors are gonna kill you.

[B]

They would come for me.

[A]

They will make your dick soft. You'll be like, you can share the bill with the girls, but you won't. You won't be tonight.

[B]

Yeah, they'll be mine.

[A]

You bring shame to us.

[B]

Damn. You're not on Raya.

[A]

They. They let me show you.

[B]

They banned you.

[A]

Let me show you.

[B]

You spoke up to you, didn't you?

[A]

They put me on a waiting list since many, many years ago.

[B]

What?

[A]

They don't want comedians.

[B]

Really?

[A]

Yeah. You have to refer me.

[B]

Yeah, I'll get you on there.

[A]

Can you talk to them?

[B]

Yeah, I know someone there.

[A]

I. Can you believe it?

[B]

Well, if it's been years, that means they are intentionally not letting you on. Yeah. If it's been. Wow, seven referrals. Yeah.

[A]

Can you talk to them?

[B]

I'll try texting you.

[A]

I mean, I. I really don't need to be on it, but, like, why not?

[B]

Yeah, that one I heard is decent.

[A]

Yeah. Are you.

[B]

No.

[A]

You are dating?

[B]

Yeah, I'm in a relationship.

[A]

Yeah. I don't. I don't. I'm not gonna go there and date, but I'm gonna go there and peek and just, like, write about it.

[B]

Yeah, I would use it to network. Yeah. Why not?

[A]

Yeah. Joke about it.

[B]

You could get some good jokes off there. Probably good stories, because.

[A]

Yeah, my jokes are everybody.

[B]

Yeah. What. What audience do you have? Is it Asians mainly?

[A]

Not really. It's very, very diverse. I would say 20 Asian comedians.

[B]

Oh, that's it.

[A]

Audience. Yeah.

[B]

Okay.

[A]

But Asians love me, obviously. Like, we sell out fast in San Francisco, Seattle, but we can sell out in places like Texas, like, anywhere. Raleigh, North Carolina. Like, my audience are Asian, black, white, Latino, gay and lesbian, and LGBTQ community.

[B]

Damn.

[A]

Yeah, they love me. I don't know why, because I talk about everybody. But they do love me. They like a diva. I think they just do.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

So my audience are just the United States of America. And we're just pretty lucky because I can play anywhere. I don't have to be like, I'm the Asian comedian.

[B]

Right.

[A]

The Asians don't claim me.

[B]

Absolutely.

[A]

I mean, they love me. I love. The Asians love me. They do.

[B]

You got a special out yet?

[A]

I have the 30 minutes on Peacock. We are doing my one hour right now with a few network. I'm just debating which one I should go with. So it's going to be major.

[B]

That's a big move.

[A]

It's big. I was, when I was a few years in, I was like, I want to be famous. And I'm like, I'm good. I want the best. I want to get the best to my people. Not in a hurry, but it's going to come out soon. So we are negotiating contracts.

[B]

Hell yeah.

[A]

Contracts. Right now with my lawyer.

[B]

Stay tuned guys. Stay tuned.

[A]

Yes.

[B]

That's a big deal. Not a lot of comedians get to that level. So you're already doing better than 99%.

[A]

I try. I try. You know, when you don't speak English, you really have a advantage.

[B]

Plus when you buy a club, I mean, I've never heard of someone taking that route.

[A]

That's how much I love it. I love comedy so much I bought myself of a club.

[B]

Right. Cuz I know people that work in clubs for 10 years and then get famous but never buying it.

[A]

Yeah, we work. You have to look at people and wait for them to give you a chance. You will own it. You can go on stage and bomb daily. Nobody can say anything.

[B]

So you were just losing money but you were getting better?

[A]

Oh yeah. Yeah, for sure.

[B]

I love it.

[A]

Yeah, I, I mean I knew how bad I am and I need to be on stage every day for 10 hours per day until I stop bombing.

[B]

Damn.

[A]

I need nobody in public. Cuz I, when I came out I'm like, no. Yeah, I did it in private.

[B]

I love it. And now you're sold out. You got a tour right now, right?

[A]

Yeah, it's selling out just like my husband's.

[B]

Wow. You only had one husband, I thought, oh, honey, two. Damn.

[A]

My first one is my college sweetheart. He's the one that's got away. He's Russian. Russian from Kentucky. He's a communist. It's a connection.

[B]

Well, China's communist.

[A]

You don't see him coming one day getting my. I'm like, okay.

[B]

Was that one of your shows?

[A]

No, he never came to my show. He, we. We broke up before I started comedy. But he's a sweetheart. He's a nice one. I wish him the best.

[B]

Shout out to him.

[A]

He's not taking me back, obviously. Oh, but he's engaged it.

[B]

Oh, he's engaged the one that got away. But third time's the charm, they say.

[A]

I know, I'm.

[B]

I think you got this next.

[A]

My Latino couldn't work. It's my First Latino man.

[B]

Yeah, Latino, Asian could be a cool mix.

[A]

I. I hope so. I hope he's not gonna find out. I mean, he's eventually gonna find out. What about me? That's irritating. But either he's gonna like it or not, you know, it depends. I'm too old to change, so I'm waiting for the right guy or no one.

[B]

I feel that you've been watching the Olympics.

[A]

Oh yeah.

[B]

China's doing pretty good. China and us.

[A]

Yeah, they do well, China, us, I mean, is big country. We have to choose the best to represent us.

[B]

Surprising, because Chinese people aren't athletic, but.

[A]

They'Re doing the ones who are in the team. They have a lot of resource to train every day, right?

[B]

Work ethic.

[A]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's a work asset. But most people are not really into sports. But if they are in the team, they have to bring honor and glory back to, to the motherland.

[B]

Right. They put them in a sweatshop.

[A]

Yeah, yeah.

[B]

Work 18 hours a day.

[A]

They have to work hard.

[B]

That's what I noticed about me because I wasn't athletic, but I could work hard.

[A]

Yeah. It's your friend's mom.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

It's your ancestors for sure. It's just that you're is in your blood.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

If your girl wants you go all night, you'll do it.

[B]

If my girl wanted it. Yeah.

[A]

You do it.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

If you just have to do it, you do it.

[B]

Yeah, I've done it. Yeah.

[A]

How long? How many times?

[B]

Most I've done in a day is six.

[A]

That's pretty good.

[B]

Not bad, right?

[A]

Not bad.

[B]

It's been a while, but.

[A]

Do you think it's from the Chinese or from the Irish?

[B]

Chinese. I'd say Irish is more drunk, you know.

[A]

What's your go to drink?

[B]

My go to drink when I used to drink was tequila sunrise. I was pretty basic.

[A]

It's good for you.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Tequila doesn't give you hangover.

[B]

Yeah, I would never get them is good.

[A]

My friend Suji has amazing tequila at her place. I'm gonna go back and taste a few of the different tequilas.

[B]

Yeah, it's hard to be tequila. I've only gotten a hangover twice in my life.

[A]

That's good. It's Irish and Chinese in you.

[B]

Yeah. I could drink non stop.

[A]

And you don't drink anymore?

[B]

No.

[A]

How long you been not drinking?

[B]

Five years. Yeah.

[A]

Nice. That's great.

[B]

I went through a whole phase in college, but yeah, I'm out of it.

[A]

Yeah, I used to drink and I'm. I wouldn't say sober, but I just don't really drink anymore.

[B]

Yeah, I'm at that spot. Like, I'm going on a cruise next week. I'll have a drink, but I'm not going to.

[A]

Yeah, yeah, get drunk. It's just like, it's so. I. I was. Monday, I went to this hot yoga. It was so intense. I felt so high and I got so high after stage. I was like, I'm feeling great. You know, I don't want to, like, don't know what I'm doing. Don't feel it. I want to feel 100.

[B]

Yeah. Hot yoga. I like.

[A]

Sober sex is the best.

[B]

It is. Drunk sex is. Doesn't feel as good.

[A]

Yeah, just like you don't remember as much. It feels good and no, you don't remember it.

[B]

Sometimes you don't remember it at all.

[A]

Yeah, it's not good.

[B]

Yeah, Yoga is a good spot to meet girls.

[A]

Oh, yeah.

[B]

I tell all my single guy friends, go to hot yoga at Lifetime. You're the only guy there. 20 girls.

[A]

Yeah. And they all care about their body.

[B]

Yeah, they're all pretty physically attractive. So if you're watching this, guys go to hot yoga.

[A]

High yoga is where you go, I.

[B]

Strained my neck last time.

[A]

You make me look so old. Because you are so young.

[B]

You're young.

[A]

I look old next to you.

[B]

Really? Asians are hard to tell. You know, I've gotten 20. I've gotten 40.

[A]

No, you look 20.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Oh, oh, okay. I mean, I look good for whatever.

[B]

I don't know how old you are.

[A]

But I look good for a comedian.

[B]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. A lot of comedians.

[A]

It's rough. I mean, it's not. It's. It's not hard. It's harder competition.

[B]

Yeah, they're getting older now. All the good ones. Yeah, there's not really. There's some upand comers. Matt R. And Schultz is young, I guess, beautiful. Yeah. Matt R. Is pretty beautiful. Yeah, he's gotten a lot of girls.

[A]

Yeah, he's a whisper.

[B]

Yeah. Have you.

[A]

Wait, I know.

[B]

Collaborated with him.

[A]

Yeah, he. We work a lot at the Love Factory and I booked him on the first show for I met comedy club. Oh, you booked him for only fans comedy show.

[B]

Oh, nice.

[A]

Yeah, I produced it at my comedy club. My ref and I were. We were the first comedy show for them I produced.

[B]

Wow.

[A]

I know him.

[B]

So you knew him before he blew up or.

[A]

Yeah, I know him before he blew up.

[B]

Hell yeah.

[A]

Right before. I mean, a few years before. But when we did that show, it was probably three or four months before.

[B]

Okay.

[A]

He just remember he was in the green room like literally upset cuz he had like 190,000 followers on Instagram and his Instagram is banned.

[B]

What?

[A]

Yeah, it's just like something you post, you know, people hate. So it's banned and he's like really upset. And then three months later.

[B]

Did you see him blowing up like that?

[A]

Can I see it from far away? Yeah, I, I can see it because he's, he's a comedy nerd. He start when he's like 17, so he's only like in late 20s, but he's been doing it for over 10 years.

[B]

10 years? Yeah.

[A]

And he truly just love it. And he's a pretty boy, but he just truly love comedy and people hate him. But it's just the not fair because I can't imagine me doing Colin. I'm 17, I wasn't even know what I'm gonna do. So he just, he's quoting called Colin George Colin when he's 17 on his Instagram. Like he, that's what he wanted his whole life.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

And he worked for it and over 10 years for somebody who's talented and really handsome, it can happen and it happens.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

And Tick Tock picked up. You know, it just, Haters just need to chill the out.

[B]

Yeah, he used to get a lot. Yeah. Speaking of Tick Tock, you got banned off Tick Tock, right? What'd you do?

[A]

I just bitched about it.

[B]

What do you mean?

[A]

I, I, I, I, My lawyer wrote a letter and then they kind of Jewish lawyers are the best. Hashtag Jewish lawyers. So now everything's better because I, I felt whenever I got defeated as an Asian in me wanted to be like, oh what should we do? And let's just be children don't cause problems. But like as a crazy boss bitch, you may be like now. No, I know, I know. I'm not. No, I'm not. Okay, I'm not. Okay. I'm going to, I'm going to be talking, I'm going to fix this. I just feel like not subtle is one of the advice I can give young artists or entrepreneurs. Because I'm also an entrepreneur. I just don't settle. Yes. There's always a way. When there's a will, there's a way you can figure it out. If I can do this without speaking English, you can do it way better than I can do it.

[B]

Yeah, way better. Props to you.

[A]

Yeah, way better. I, I just feel like nothing I do is special. But in special bomb is like I Just don't give up.

[B]

Yeah, my mom, same thing. Came here from China, didn't speak English. 20 bucks in her pocket. Used to scrub the floors.

[A]

Honey, Granny, her bank.

[B]

Now she's a millionaire. Yeah, yeah. 20 in her pocket. Scrubbed the kitchen floors, did the dishes, didn't speak English.

[A]

Yeah, well, when I worked in the kitchen, too. Restaurant. When you don't speak English, you have to clean the bathroom, too. Your waiter, clean bathroom, cashier. You do everything because they bully you.

[B]

Right?

[A]

Because you don't have a group.

[B]

You don't know better. Right.

[A]

You don't have a green card.

[B]

Right.

[A]

You are working illegally, so you have to be doing everything. I did all of it.

[B]

Damn.

[A]

That's why I don't. When I was in college, I want to learn finance. I'm like, I. One thing I don't want to be is being poor. I don't want to be poor. I'll be rich. And before I'm an artist, I'd be having money. I don't believe in starving artists. I just don't believe in it.

[B]

You're too stressed to perform at your best.

[A]

Exactly. And. And whenever you're performing, auditioning, doing anything, you have an agenda. You want to get paid.

[B]

Right.

[A]

And that's not going to work.

[B]

It doesn't align.

[A]

No. You are gonna go to audition and be like, please help me and perform your. No, no. I don't believe in it. I just don't. I just don't believe it. I. I don't struggle. I never struggle as an artist because I. I just don't believe in being starving and create.

[B]

I agree. You got that safety net you could fall back on.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Yeah. I'm the same way. That's the problem with a lot of podcasters, actually. They rely on it to make money.

[A]

No, you have to have fun. Visit.

[B]

You have to.

[A]

And all the top shows.

[B]

Have fun.

[A]

Yeah. You have to do the best thing and have fun.

[B]

Yep, it's been cool. Where. Where's your next performances and where can people find you?

[A]

Oh, my God. Friday, I'm going to Kirkland, to Washington. Costco, Mica of Asian church. We go to church on Sunday, which is Costco.

[B]

You go to church.

[A]

That's Asian church. Costco.

[B]

Wow.

[A]

I go to Costco on Sundays. Nice to buy dicks. In bulk. I'm kidding. Anything in bulk. And then we have Chicago, we have Vancouver, Portland, Oregon. I mean, everywhere. I'm coming all over America. Summerscombdy.com we have a massive tour. We'll go international. So I'll be all over.

[B]

We'll link below. Thanks for coming on.

[A]

Thank you for having me.

[B]

Yep. Thanks for watching, guys, as always. See you next time.