Ilana Glazer: The Truth About 'Broad City,' Female Friendships & Building a Creative Life

Summary

DisGRACEful with Grace O’Malley

Episode: Ilana Glazer – The Truth About 'Broad City,' Female Friendships & Building a Creative Life

Date: December 4, 2025
Host: Grace O’Malley
Guest: Ilana Glazer

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Episode Overview

In this deeply candid and often hilarious episode, comedian and writer Ilana Glazer joins Grace O’Malley to unpack the creation of ‘Broad City’, the reality of female friendships, navigating creative ambition, modern digital life, and making space for vulnerability in comedy. The conversation moves through personal stories, industry insights, and takes on the current socio-political climate, all with honesty and humor.

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Starting Out & Nerves (01:12–02:15)

• Ilana Glazer admits to being “nervous 70% of the time” (01:31), immediately bonding with Grace over mutual anxiety. Both express gratitude for honesty and authenticity in conversation.

  • Quote: “I’m nervous pretty much all the time. 70% of the time I have a nervous tummy.” – Ilana (01:31)

• The pair joke about recording in September for a December episode, referencing how unpredictable life is: “We don’t know what could happen from then.” – Grace (02:29)

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2. The State of the World & Finding Grounding (03:01–06:09)

• Both reflect on the week's unsettling events and how social and political chaos can destabilize personal wellbeing. Ilana describes “unraveling and losing my sense of self,” but finding it again by connecting with friends—sometimes with humor, sometimes with raw honesty (05:29).

• Joking as a Coping Mechanism: “Jokes aren’t really funny without stakes. So to me, grounding in reality makes the jokes funnier.” – Ilana (06:20)

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3. Catholic vs. Jewish Guilt, Religion, and American Foundations (06:59–10:12)

• Spirited dialogue on Catholic vs. Jewish guilt:
  • “Catholic guilt is in your fucking mind. You’re supposed to feel guilty for your thoughts and feelings. It’s impossible.” – Ilana (07:13)
• The conversation transitions to how American founding ideals blur church and state, with Ilana explaining Erica Chidi’s insight about Calvinism fusing capitalism and piety:
  • “The more money you have, the more likely you’re to get into heaven or something.” (09:20)
• Both express disillusionment with the persistent influence of religion on politics and culture:
  • “What happened to church and state?” – Grace (07:45)

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4. Performing Under Pressure & Escaping Through Creativity (11:43–13:11)

• Ilana describes the ongoing pressure inherent in the entertainment industry, calling it a sort of crucible that makes performance possible (12:19).
• Grace reveals she tries not to dwell on politics in her podcast but sometimes “dying to get it out.” (12:32)
• They agree that honest conversation with the right people is profoundly grounding.

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5. Family, Upbringing & Humor Roots (13:13–16:36)

• Childhood performance dynamics: Ilana was her brother’s “marionette puppet.”

• A legacy of comedy runs in the family with her grandfather’s “KrapeTV” sketches, dubbing herself a “nepo baby in name only”:

  • “He gave us the brand. Zero dollars.” – Ilana (17:48)

• Grace shares a bittersweet story about being unknowingly placed in a special needs theater camp, underlining family obliviousness but also the tenacious child performer inside her (15:21).

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6. Mental Health, Mania, & Choosing Rest (19:22–20:12)

• Both relate to family patterns of mania and depression.
• Ilana on depression: “Sometimes depression feels good because you’re like, alright, kind of the grounded reality we’re talking about.” (19:42)
• Choosing rest (versus crashing) is identified as a sign of growing up.

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7. Sobriety, Online Personas & The New Podcast (20:02–22:19)

• Grace opens up about taking a break from drinking, noting the difference between sharing personal growth online versus with friends.
• Ilana’s new podcast, It’s Open With Ilana Glazer, will mix sociopolitical honesty with lighter, everyday joys (“My best friend sent me a picture of pickles he made. I want to talk about pickles.” – Ilana (21:21))

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8. Social Media & Digital Culture (22:16–25:28)

• Discussion of Twitter, Blue Sky, Tumblr, porn on platforms, and generational shifts in how sexuality and humor are navigated online.
• “Tumblr was more queer, more actually hot and less violent than Twitter.” – Ilana (23:49)
• Grace confesses to Catholic guilt while exploring sexuality on Tumblr (24:21).

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9. Comedy Careers & Parental Support (25:28–28:13)

• Both discuss hiding ambitions from parents at first. Ilana attended NYU intent on comedy, “allocating their money as a day job for me to pursue comedy at night.” (25:29)
• Parents were hesitant (“They didn’t know that there’s a business behind the art…” – Ilana (25:47))

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10. Analog vs. Digital in Creative Careers (32:39–34:47)

• Ilana describes having more “analog” years, performing standup before smartphones:
  • “I got to do stand up for a few years without smartphones recording everything.” (33:23)
• The fragmentation and pressure of existing as a public persona in a digital hellscape vs. a more private, analog world.

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11. Human Rights, Political Divides, and Everyday Values (36:12–41:15)

• Deep dive into the so-called “utopia” of progressive cities like NYC, examining the harsh realities people still face.
• Ilana deconstructs the false equivalence of baseline human rights as a “political side”:
  • “Believing that everybody… should be a global standard for basic human rights is not a side of a game you believe in. That is a baseline fucking human common sense.” (36:58)
• Lamenting the manipulation of rights as “radical,” and the absurdity of Fox News labeling simple ethics as extreme.

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12. Wealth, Privilege & Encountering “Too Much Money” (46:04–51:26)

• Grace relates her discomfort during a Hamptons visit: “I saw it and it made me sick… There is too much.” (46:46)
• Ilana recalls NYU exposing her to extreme wealth, which “felt violent.”
• Both contrast new money and mafia money, drawing lines between grit and systemic privilege.

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13. Hollywood Encounters & Broad City’s Origins (52:09–61:36)

• Discussing selling the first script at age 24, reflecting on “being too nice” or “overly friendly,” and the way young women are trained to please.
  • “Young women are always overly friendly because we’re trained to feel unworthy.” – Ilana (52:53)
• No regrets: “I don’t regret anything, I’ve done so much therapy… It’s all part of a process of getting here.” (53:38)
• The detailed, bootstrapped creation of Broad City: from making 35 web shorts to learning TV production by necessity.
• Amy Poehler’s pivotal role (“She really, like, mothered that whole experience.” – Ilana (55:47))

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14. Processing Success & Looking Back at ‘Broad City’ (61:29–62:52)

• Ilana is not tired of talking about ‘Broad City’:
  • “I’m riding high, not sick of it at all. I love it.” (61:41)
• She’s able to talk about it with fondness having processed the experience and moved forward as a creator, performer, and new parent.

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15. Transitioning to New Projects: ‘Babes’ & Autobiographical Art (63:05–66:43)

• A heartfelt look at Babes, inspired in part by losing their close mutual friend Kevin Barnett:
  • “Kevin Barnett was a genius, a beautiful genius... I can communicate my personal loss but… the loss of our comedy community… I can’t even communicate it.” (64:13)
• The importance of women’s friendships, rituals of support, and confronting the awe (and terror) of impending parenthood.

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16. Female Friendships & Emotional Depth (71:38–73:14)

• Ilana: “The hoping that your friend will be your partner in life is something I relate to… The importance of friendships and how hard we rely on them.” (71:50)
• Grace praises Ilana’s work for capturing the real pain and intimacy of friendship:
  • “You do such a great job nailing female friendships.” (72:51)

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17. The “Disgraceful Receipts” Segment – Laughing at Embarrassing Photos (77:46–88:38)

• Grace presents Ilana with old photos; Ilana reacts with joyful self-mockery and nostalgia, riffing on her own stylings (“It’s giving Genie from Aladdin." – 78:27) and candidly describing early-career TV appearances with no idea what a stylist was.
• Both enjoy roasting their past selves:
  • “Dressed like this, it’s almost like… your dress rehearsal. I picked up the baton and got to do the performance.” (80:54)

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18. Fan Voicemails: Work Disasters (91:06–106:13)

• Listeners share cringe and harrowing workplace tales: spilled beer on a guest, discovering a dead rat at work, being punched by a student, and a wild story involving being caught in bed by an affair partner’s wife (“She pulled a knife on me…” – 105:12). Each story met with empathy, humor, and advice.
• Ilana: “A boss is not supposed to… even if you’re the most Parisian bitch you’ve ever seen…” (99:06)
• Grace: “I’ve always been like an older 21. You’re a silly goose. I just kind of walked away.” (98:12)

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Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• On Resilience and Advice:
  • “Do exactly what you’re doing. You won’t always trust you, but trust me, you are correct.” – Ilana to Grace (54:01)
• On Processing Professional Success:
  • “Am I looking at it or am I in it? And I’ve made enough work now… that I can look back… with such fondness.” (62:09)
• On Human Rights & Basic Values:
  • “This isn’t even political. This is just basic human rights.” – Ilana (40:10)
• On Friendship Breakups:
  • “I was going through a long-term friendship breakup when I watched your movie…That is…to the T. Like, you do such a great job nailing female friendships.” – Grace (72:44)

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Timestamps for Key Segments

• Ilana admits to nerves, podcast preview: 01:31–02:15
• Reflections on world events, coping with humor: 03:39–06:09
• Catholic/Jewish guilt and church/state: 06:59–10:12
• Digital 'hellscape,' generational shifts: 32:39–34:47
• NYU, encountering extreme wealth: 46:04–51:26
• Selling ‘Broad City’ at 24, learning by doing: 52:09–61:07
• Amy Poehler’s mentorship: 55:47–60:13
• Ilana: not tired of ‘Broad City’ yet: 61:29–62:52
• Creating & acting in ‘Babes’: 63:05–66:43
• ‘Disgraceful Receipts’ photo segment: 77:42–88:38
• Listener stories on work disasters: 91:20–106:13

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Tone & Takeaways

This episode is both sharply funny and incisively real, moving fluidly from absurd anecdotes to profound, vulnerable admissions. Ilana and Grace model the essence of modern comedic friendship: honesty, mutual support, readiness to joke about anything, and holding grief, joy, and critique in the same breath. Fans of Broad City, female friendship stories, and unfiltered talk on creative life will find this conversation especially rewarding.

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Recommended for: Listeners seeking the real story behind 'Broad City,' insights on creative survival, open-hearted discussion about friendship, and smart, hilarious banter about modern life.

Transcript

[Grace O'Malley]

On December 19, based on the best selling novel, Amanda Seyfried and Sydney Sweeney star in the Housemaid. A wildly entertaining thriller about a live in housemaid and the wealthy Winchester family experience a twisted world where perfection is an illusion and nothing is as it seems. The shocking twists will leave you guessing until the very end. Can you keep a secret? The Housemaid Rate Rated R. Only in theaters December 19th. Get tickets now.

[Alana Glaser]

Coming at you live from a shady.

[Grace O'Malley]

Manhattan studio, it's Disgraceful. Featuring your gracious ginger host. Hey, watch yourself. Only I can say that. Okay, boss, whatever you say. You pay my bills. Give it up for Grace o'. Malley.

Hi, guys. Welcome back to another episode of Disgraceful. I am so stoked. I'm very nervous. I just said out loud and I'm just all around very pumped for this next guest. Here we go. Writer, comedian, Tony award winning Alana Glaser, everybody.

[Alana Glaser]

Hi.

[Grace O'Malley]

How we doing?

[Alana Glaser]

Good. I'm so excited to be here talking to you, Grace.

[Grace O'Malley]

So happy to have you. As I've already stated, very nervous. I think we should get right into. We're recording this in September.

[Alana Glaser]

Copy that.

[Grace O'Malley]

And it's coming out in December because you have a special project coming up.

[Alana Glaser]

Yes. First of all, I just want to say I appreciate you saying that you're nervous. I'm nervous pretty much all the time. 70% of the time I have like a nervous tummy. That's like what's happening and what is gonna happen. So I appreciate you saying that. Yeah. But if it's December now.

[Grace O'Malley]

Happy holidays.

[Alana Glaser]

But yes, I. Then I have put out a self produced video podcast called it's open with Alana Glaser.

[Grace O'Malley]

No way.

[Alana Glaser]

Yeah.

[Grace O'Malley]

I didn't even know that that was. It was sent to us in an email that it was a special project. And so I'm like, I couldn't wait to ask. That was why it's the first question.

[Alana Glaser]

Yes, yes, yes. Oh, that's so sweet. Yeah.

[Grace O'Malley]

I wonder how it's going.

[Alana Glaser]

It's. Well, we're just getting started now.

[Grace O'Malley]

Oh, you already did. Okay.

So weird, right? I know. What, like the future kind of stuff.

[Alana Glaser]

But I also. I don't know if you include that we're recording this in September. I also appreciate that honesty. You know what I mean?

[Grace O'Malley]

We don't know what could happen from then. It's. I mean, we've had quite the week just now.

[Alana Glaser]

Holy moly.

[Grace O'Malley]

Things are moving in. In not even the right direction.

[Alana Glaser]

Yeah, yeah. In like all different directions on purpose.

So that we stay in the feeling of crisis.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yes.

[Alana Glaser]

Holy moly.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yes. Yeah. God. For fucking sake. I will say that on the day that we're recording this, I don't know if maybe, like, only half of the population will see it, because it is the rapture today. Did you see this?

[Alana Glaser]

Oh, my God. It is the rapture today. May God bless us all. I'm not even sure, Like, I don't know what is supposed to happen to Jews. I don't want to know, because today's also Rosh Hashanah.

[Grace O'Malley]

I was going to say.

[Alana Glaser]

That's my focus.

[Grace O'Malley]

Happy first day of Rosh Hashanah.

[Alana Glaser]

Thank you. And last, I guess.

[Grace O'Malley]

Oh, there's only one.

[Alana Glaser]

Well, if it's the rapture.

[Grace O'Malley]

Oh, yes, of course. I don't know my Jewish holidays that well. And so that was me trying to figure it out.

[Alana Glaser]

I don't know like, what kind of, like, horrific nonsense.

[Grace O'Malley]

You hear that? It's happening.

[Alana Glaser]

Here.

[Grace O'Malley]

It is.

[Alana Glaser]

It's coming.

[Grace O'Malley]

I hope you can pick that up in audio, because that's crazy.

[Alana Glaser]

I was feeling really obviously disturbed this past week.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah, of course.

[Alana Glaser]

But there's the assassination of Charlie Kirk. There was the machine that is now operating our government, the propaganda machine that is now operating our government that was orienting itself around what to do around the assassination of Charlie Kirk. And then it was very scary, the. Whatever that spectacular was around his death this weekend at the White House.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yes. Spectacular was wild.

[Alana Glaser]

It was like a Christmas spectacular.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah.

[Alana Glaser]

Chinese New Year spectacular for.

He was assassinated. I'm, like, stuttering because I'm like. It's just so horrific and so consequential and was not treated that way.

[Grace O'Malley]

No, it was treated like a SNL special 50th anniversary.

[Alana Glaser]

It was really. It really. So much of it, like, seemed fictional. It's so painful, the reality we're supposed to be holding, and then it's fractured and then reality, and then it's numbing and then. Oh, my gosh. Yeah, if you're lucky.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah. Well, it's just. It's almost like you see these things and then you're like, well, yeah, no, I guess I expected that. Like, when I saw Trump giving a speech about fixing autism, I. I was just like. Yeah, no, I figured he'd probably say that. It's just like.

[Alana Glaser]

It gets pretty crazy. It feels so demoralizing. And then the Kimmel thing. The Kimmel. And then he's back on tonight, unfortunately, again, for the last time, because it's the rapture. Oh, my God.

[Grace O'Malley]

Well, at least we get one last hurrah. You know what Time is it supp.

[Alana Glaser]

Stop this rapture. I know. I hope it's. I hope he's, like, recording early.

[Grace O'Malley]

It's LA time.

[Alana Glaser]

Yeah, that's right. But yeah, it's. It's. It's just wild out there. And I really, like.

Like, unraveled and lost my sense of self. And then I found it in the past couple days by, like, talking to my friends.

Sometimes, like, laughing about it and not talking about it.

[Grace O'Malley]

Absolutely.

[Alana Glaser]

And then also.

And then also, like, getting for real and talking about it.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah. I've also found myself, like, weaving and flowing through which friends seem to be like, I'll have one conversation with one friend. I'll be like, I'm gonna call this other friend.

[Alana Glaser]

And let me ask, are you looking to be grounded in reality even if it is painful? That's the sense I'm getting.

[Grace O'Malley]

Absolutely. Yes.

[Alana Glaser]

Copy that.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah. 100%.

[Alana Glaser]

Yep.

[Grace O'Malley]

We're in it. We're in the depths. I mean, why wouldn't you be?

[Alana Glaser]

100%.

[Grace O'Malley]

I do like jokes, though.

[Alana Glaser]

Totally.

[Grace O'Malley]

I think keeping it not light, but keeping your morale up is through jokes.

[Alana Glaser]

And also, jokes aren't really funny without stakes. So to me, grounding in reality makes the jokes funnier.

[Grace O'Malley]

Absolutely.

[Alana Glaser]

That's why these rapture jokes are killing.

[Grace O'Malley]

Oh, my God. Well, you're going to hate me.

[Alana Glaser]

That's not real. Yeah, it's just. It's not gonna happen, dude. I'm like, don't. They keep calling. The rapture is gonna happen and then it doesn't happen. And it's like, wouldn't you think that if it happened once and that you really thought it was gonna happen and then it didn't, that would be it?

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah. No, it could be. No, because it's the. It's this Catholic thing. I talk about Catholicism every episode on this podcast because I've got Catholic guilt up the ass.

[Alana Glaser]

It's worse than Jewish guilt. They, like, parrot it. When I was growing up in the night, back in the 90s, they were pairing, like, Jewish guilt and Catholic. Catholic guilt is so much worse.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah. What is? So what would Jewish guilt, like, entail?

[Alana Glaser]

Your mother.

[Grace O'Malley]

Okay, gotcha.

[Alana Glaser]

But Catholic guilt is in your fucking mind. Yeah, you can't. You. You're supposed to feel guilty for your thoughts and feelings. It's impossible. Whereas Jews, like, we love to feel and think and whatever, but it's like, you feel bad. Whatever.

[Grace O'Malley]

I think you guys are a little more grounded, you know, I think that you're, like, more honest about what's going on.

[Alana Glaser]

And Christianity, like, well, also like what's going on with Jews in Israel? It's a different era now. But Catholicism, like what's happened with Christianity and the way it's been used is just crazy.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah.

[Alana Glaser]

It's pretty nuts. So that's why I think it's less grounded.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah. I was actually saying the other day, you ever look at even a dollar bill, it says in God we trust. What happened to church and state?

[Alana Glaser]

Yep.

[Grace O'Malley]

I thought we were church and state in it. I feel like, I feel like there's a lot of things in this country we've got to, you know, revamp. Yeah. And yeah, I was just looking at the dollar bill, I'm like, yeah, I think we do. We fucked up. And like right here at the, at the money.

[Alana Glaser]

Well, can I ask you, what do you mean? Like in God we trust, should we not have put that on the dollar bill?

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah, I thought like, like this whole country was built on like. No, everyone's religion is allowed.

[Alana Glaser]

Right.

[Grace O'Malley]

And, and, but we won't bring it into our, our structure of politics. Right.

[Alana Glaser]

But that was like our, I believe, like, you know, hopeful liberal interpretation of it. But it's always been rooted in, I mean, this is. Okay, Erica Chitty. Erica Chitty, you gotta follow her, you gotta know her. She's one of my closest friends and also a fucking genius. And I was talking to her yesterday, she was like the person that I was like, I gotta call Erica to get my feet back on the ground. And she just knows. She has such a global sense of things. And she was like telling me. And I, I kind of knew, but I forgot that our country's rooted in Calvinism. Part of what the Pilgrims. I. No, I didn't know either.

[Grace O'Malley]

So my mind immediately goes to Fahrenheit and Calvin.

[Alana Glaser]

Uh huh.

[Grace O'Malley]

What? Calvin and Hobbes is Calvin.

[Alana Glaser]

Who's Farah? Calvin.

[Grace O'Malley]

Science Calvin. Calvin, yes.

[Alana Glaser]

Okay, I'm talking Calvin, like Calvin Klein. Calvin and Hobbes. Calvinism, I think.

[Grace O'Malley]

Okay.

[Alana Glaser]

I don't know.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah, I'm learning. So am I.

[Alana Glaser]

So am I. As I say it out loud, I'm like, I knew this and I didn't know this before yesterday.

[Grace O'Malley]

Ye.

[Alana Glaser]

So Calvinism, this is part of what the pilgrims brought as they colonized our country is Calvinism, which pairs capitalism and getting into heaven. So the more money you have, the more likely you're to get into heaven or something. So our country was founded on this?

[Grace O'Malley]

Yes. Okay.

[Alana Glaser]

And like, you know, civil rights, like people, the abolitionists and the civil rights movement have been creating human rights for our country. And I guess, you know, I guess like people who have common sense and a moral compass are saying what you said, separation of church and state. This makes sense because then many religions get to celebrate this country and make it what it is. And also we know that our diversity is our biggest strength.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah.

[Alana Glaser]

You and I know that.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah.

[Alana Glaser]

But I guess in God we trust. You're right. It's on the dollar bill. So what I'm hearing when you say that is like, wait, it's been here all along?

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah, it has. Totally.

[Alana Glaser]

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[Grace O'Malley]

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[Alana Glaser]

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[Grace O'Malley]

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[Alana Glaser]

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[Grace O'Malley]

Store near you on December 19th. Based on the best selling novel, Amanda Seyfri and Sydney Sweeney star in the Housemaid. A wildly entertaining thriller about a live in housemaid and the wealthy Winchester family experience a twisted world where perfection is an illusion and nothing is as it seems. The shocking twists will leave you guessing until the very end. Can you keep a secret? The Housemaid Rate Rated R only in theaters December 19th. Get tickets now.

[Alana Glaser]

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[Grace O'Malley]

We got deep quick. This is good. I like this. This is refreshing.

[Alana Glaser]

Me too. Because you're right. Like the thing. I had a few conversations last week right after the Kimmel thing where. Right after. After Kimmel, after Disney pulled Kimmel off the air where people were like, you put a lot of pressure on yourself. And I was like what? Like the world is full of pressure. Like I'm almost just trying to hold my shape in this world. Yeah.

[Grace O'Malley]

And kind of pressure is the thing that moves you.

[Alana Glaser]

That's right.

[Grace O'Malley]

Especially I hate to say in, in this industry, but really, truly like you have to perform under pressure.

[Alana Glaser]

That's right.

[Grace O'Malley]

All the time.

[Alana Glaser]

It's never chill. And if it were, it's like not a Good performance.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah. No, it's not.

[Alana Glaser]

There's got to be sort of a container around it to contain that energy into pressure.

So getting deep quick. All that to say? I think it's positive.

[Grace O'Malley]

This is nice to have this conversation because I. And I'll be honest, right now, I. I tried to, like, like, tiptoe around politics on this. On this podcast as, like, a place for people to escape, but sometimes I'm just dying to get it out, you know?

[Alana Glaser]

Oh, yeah, yeah. And your perspective. I want to hear it. I want to feel it, too, because I feel. It's like. It helps me feel. Talking about this with you right now, you in particular, it feels like, normal. Yes. It's insane, but you can kind of talk about it and at least not feel personally insane and, like, hold hands and be like, this is insane.

[Grace O'Malley]

Wait, so you're. You're a brother's in the. In the game.

[Alana Glaser]

Yeah.

[Grace O'Malley]

Do you guys ever work together?

[Alana Glaser]

Yeah, and we. We really started together, and we.

[Grace O'Malley]

Okay, so who. Who kind of pushed who?

[Alana Glaser]

Dude, when we were, like, little kids, I was like my brother's marionette puppet. Like, willfully, gleefully. We have hours, like, in Chicago. What does that mean?

[Grace O'Malley]

Like, when. When he uses her as, like, a marionette.

[Alana Glaser]

Oh, copy that.

[Grace O'Malley]

Sorry.

[Alana Glaser]

I, like, wish I knew the reference, and I was like, the town or the show, but I don't.

I know the show, and I'm like. I'm more like, damn.

[Grace O'Malley]

Damn.

[Alana Glaser]

That's my knowledge of Chicago.

[Grace O'Malley]

Oh, Chicago's like. I feel like everybody has their one play.

[Alana Glaser]

Yeah, Chicago's mine. Yeah.

[Grace O'Malley]

Like, through and through. I was like. I was, like, five years old being like, hey, coming.

[Alana Glaser]

I once, in a musical review in high school, shared that song in Chicago. That's supposed to be whatever the main woman's character's name is.

[Grace O'Malley]

Wait, you shared it?

[Alana Glaser]

Shared it.

[Grace O'Malley]

What's that mean?

[Alana Glaser]

Like, me and another girl. Was it Nikki Marciante? And we shared that song, even though it's.

[Grace O'Malley]

Oh, say it together.

[Alana Glaser]

Yes.

[Grace O'Malley]

Oh, gotcha. Okay. I thought you meant, like, you, like, like, burned a CD and, like, shared it to everyone.

[Alana Glaser]

No, no, we, like, we shared the perform. Well, I didn't communicate it. Well. We shared the performance.

[Grace O'Malley]

Oh, hell, yeah.

[Alana Glaser]

And it was really nerdy. I wish.

[Grace O'Malley]

I wish I did.

[Alana Glaser]

You didn't.

[Grace O'Malley]

No.

[Alana Glaser]

Oh, man.

[Grace O'Malley]

I had it in my head. I had, like, a dad who wishes I was a football player, and so I just kind of had it in the back of my head that I had to try sports, and I just. I did. I also. My mom did send me. And I wonder. I wonder how you feel about this. My mom did send me to a theater camp, and she came to the dress rehearsal. I've said this many times, but she came to the dress rehearsal and she said, you're. And I was like, the best one there. I was like, this is amazing. This is so awesome. And when we left, she said, you're not going back? And I said, well, what the hell? I'm like, literally the best one. The star lead. Come to find out a few years later, it was a theater camp for special needs kids.

You practice really good. Really good containment there.

[Alana Glaser]

Well, I've got feelings and questions in every direction. Did she know it was a special needs.

[Grace O'Malley]

No, she was just dropping me off. She never came in.

[Alana Glaser]

Got it.

[Grace O'Malley]

And so when she came to the dress rehearsal, she was like, all right, copy. That's gonna do it. That's not fair.

[Alana Glaser]

Okay, so here's another thing. But I feel like I finish the fucking show. I know.

[Grace O'Malley]

I feel like I let them down.

[Alana Glaser]

I guess your mom got embarrassed in, like, many ways, and one of them was that she didn't know what was. Yeah, yeah.

[Grace O'Malley]

She would just chop me off.

[Alana Glaser]

Oh, but you should have gotten to perform.

[Grace O'Malley]

I know.

[Alana Glaser]

I love that. And you didn't know it was a special needs camp? No, I just, like, the dude's fucking lit.

[Grace O'Malley]

The one thing I noticed is that the teacher had a lisp and she wasn't even a part of it.

[Alana Glaser]

That's a special need. A lisp.

[Grace O'Malley]

It was just like. Just like a thing I noticed.

[Alana Glaser]

Oh, copy.

[Grace O'Malley]

And then everybody else, like, I was like, these are my boys.

[Alana Glaser]

Yeah. That's awesome.

My good hearted grace. It was good. It was good.

[Grace O'Malley]

But then my dreams were crushed, so I never went back.

[Alana Glaser]

That's so sad. That's really sad. Your parents should have gotten divorced.

[Grace O'Malley]

No, I don't.

[Alana Glaser]

I'm just kidding.

[Grace O'Malley]

I don't know.

It all comes back.

[Alana Glaser]

Okay, that's you and your brother.

[Grace O'Malley]

Sorry, I feel like I went on a tangent.

[Alana Glaser]

And then you never did theater again. Oh, that is so sad. I love. Theater's, like, the fucking best for a kid, too. It's just like, they all love it. All kids love to dance. RuPaul.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yes.

[Alana Glaser]

RuPaul says that all children need a dance class.

[Grace O'Malley]

You were. You were on. On Drag. Drag Race, right? Yeah. How was that?

[Alana Glaser]

It was great. Yeah, it was. It was great. And it was incredible. Like, just to watch, like, the. The production of it and.

[Grace O'Malley]

Is it all in one day when you come.

[Alana Glaser]

My part was Your part judging is. Yeah, yeah. But I think. I think they only filmed for, like, two weeks.

[Grace O'Malley]

Oh, no.

[Alana Glaser]

Two or three weeks, but I don't know. I don't know.

[Grace O'Malley]

Let's condense.

[Alana Glaser]

Yeah. But, yeah, my brother and I just made tons of comedy videos when we were kids. We were obsessed.

[Grace O'Malley]

You had a name for it?

[Alana Glaser]

Yes. We had KrapeTV.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yes.

[Alana Glaser]

Which we inherited from our grandpa Dave, my mom's dad. He. My grandpa would make sketch videos.

[Grace O'Malley]

No way.

[Alana Glaser]

Yes. And called it KrapeTV. And then, like, we were, in a way, nepo babies. In a way where he gave us the brand. $0.

[Grace O'Malley]

I got a small loan from my.

[Alana Glaser]

Grandfather.

Just in name in no monter value.

[Grace O'Malley]

It's an ip.

[Alana Glaser]

Yeah, that's right. We got IP Kraptv. It's so. It's so funny. And he used to, like, make sketch videos and play them for us.

[Grace O'Malley]

No way.

[Alana Glaser]

Yes.

[Grace O'Malley]

Wow. Funny.

[Alana Glaser]

He was such a funny, funny, creative guy.

[Grace O'Malley]

And even as a kid, did you find them funny? Like, you know how, like, there's a disconnect with older people?

[Alana Glaser]

No, no. He was hysterical. And he was also. He and my mom have a similar thing where, like, he was. There's a Yiddish phrase, kveling, where it's like, you know, like, I'm kveling.

[Grace O'Malley]

Like, oh, my God.

[Alana Glaser]

My, like, heart is just, like, pouring over. And it's like, also, like, I could plots. I could, like, die because, like, my heart is exploding.

[Grace O'Malley]

I love these Yiddish words.

[Alana Glaser]

I know.

[Grace O'Malley]

Kutzma.

[Alana Glaser]

Chutzpah.

[Grace O'Malley]

Chutzpah is like, everything happens at the right time.

[Alana Glaser]

B'. Shert. That's B'. Shert.

[Grace O'Malley]

I'm learning.

[Alana Glaser]

It's beshert. And then chutzpah is like spirit.

[Grace O'Malley]

Oh, yeah.

[Alana Glaser]

Like fire and soul.

[Grace O'Malley]

Like, I always thought it was, like, spunk.

[Alana Glaser]

It is.

[Grace O'Malley]

Okay, you got hits, but kid.

[Alana Glaser]

That's right. You do. You've got mad chutzpah.

[Grace O'Malley]

Oh, my God. Thank you.

[Alana Glaser]

I said it wrong, but my grandpa would, like, fell. He. He was like. And my mom has this too, where they get, like, kind of manic around the kids in the family because they're, like, felling so hard. No, so his, like, performance was just like. He is wacky, dude. He was like, you know, like. And he had such ups and downs. We have, like, real, like, mania and depression in my family. So he'd be like, real up, up, up. And then on the couch.

[Grace O'Malley]

When it's up, it's up. It's fun. Yeah, yeah. We've got the same thing. In my family, too.

[Alana Glaser]

But when it's down, it's almost a relief because it's like, that was a lot to uphold.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah. It's like, all right, we got. It's like a. It's like a nature's break.

[Alana Glaser]

Yeah. Yeah. And nature just sliced that serotonin right in the middle of its stream.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah. That's. That's when nature's being a little pitch.

[Alana Glaser]

Yeah.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah.

[Alana Glaser]

I'm into it.

[Grace O'Malley]

I.

[Alana Glaser]

You know, sometimes depression feels good because you're like, all right. Kind of the grounded reality we're talking about.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah.

[Alana Glaser]

You know, just being like, this is kind of depressing.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah. And you kind of need that when you go. When you go and go and go and. Yeah. You know.

[Alana Glaser]

Yeah. And if you can, like, as I've gotten older, like, to choose, rest actually gets ahead of just crashing.

[Grace O'Malley]

Oh, yeah.

[Alana Glaser]

You know.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah. I think. I think I can say it now, since this is coming out in December. I'm taking a time off from drinking right now.

[Alana Glaser]

Yeah. Dude.

[Grace O'Malley]

And it's awesome.

[Alana Glaser]

Yeah.

[Grace O'Malley]

And I'm never. I've never been the person to be like, this is awesome. Like, this is the first time where I, like, didn't say it online. I haven't told anybody. I am telling a lot of people, actually, like, in my personal life.

[Alana Glaser]

You should. In your personal life. Because I'm just like, it's different than online.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah.

[Alana Glaser]

That's good.

[Grace O'Malley]

Because online, it's like, once you go back to it. Because it is just a break. Once you go back to it, they're like, you should go to rehab.

[Alana Glaser]

You know, online. The thing is that it's a performance.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah.

[Alana Glaser]

Yeah. And we forget that. I forget that, too. But it is a type of performance. You know, when you get on stage, that's one type of performance. When you do a zoom or whatever, that's another type. But online is a type of performance and, like, sharing personal stuff. It's. It's really different to be sharing this with people personally. Yeah.

[Grace O'Malley]

I mean, so that's probably something you're pivoting with right now with starting your podcast. Right.

[Alana Glaser]

Yeah.

[Grace O'Malley]

Or what's the. What's the premise of the podcast? Are you getting personal?

[Alana Glaser]

So the podcast is a comedy and sociopolitical podcast that talks about what is going on right now and also celebrates the little things in life.

[Grace O'Malley]

Oh, lovely. Oh, my God. Hell, yeah.

[Alana Glaser]

Yeah. You know, like, my. I really do have to talk about authoritarianism or else I'll feel crazy if I don't.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah.

[Alana Glaser]

But then my friend, one of my best friends, Indy sent me this picture of pickles he made. Fermented, not brined. And, like, I want to show that picture. Yeah, I want to talk about pickles.

[Grace O'Malley]

Do we. Do we start heavy and then end light or probably start, like.

[Alana Glaser]

Probably like what we just did?

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah. Okay, gotcha.

[Alana Glaser]

Because it's just like. Can I, like, get this out of my system?

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah, because you. You start, like. Are you doing threads or Twitter?

[Alana Glaser]

Neither.

[Grace O'Malley]

Neither. Okay.

[Alana Glaser]

Because Twitter, I'm on, but I have to, like, formally delete the account. But it's like, girl, are you, like, are you on Blue sky, or is that too queer for everybody?

[Grace O'Malley]

Are you on Blue Sky? I don't know what blue sky is.

[Alana Glaser]

I think it's, like, not non violent Twitter and less violent threads. And less violent makes it less manly.

[Grace O'Malley]

Oh, okay. I guess. Yeah. Okay.

[Alana Glaser]

That's right. Because masculinity and violence has been made one.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah.

[Alana Glaser]

In our culture. So Blue sky is something I'm, like, sniffing. And I, like, have the handle threads I'm not on. I can't let Mark Zuckerberg, like, hold my mind nor my content anymore.

[Grace O'Malley]

We have my thoughts, please.

[Alana Glaser]

Yeah, no, thanks.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah, well, so I've been kind of getting weird on threads. I made the pivot.

[Alana Glaser]

Getting weird. What you mean?

[Grace O'Malley]

Well, I did. I did. I think I tweeted something along the lines of, do they have dick and balls on here too? Because on Twitter they have plenty of dick and balls.

[Alana Glaser]

I don't know what this means.

[Grace O'Malley]

Addition porn on Twitter. Oh, literal porn. Literal porn. And someone responded, they do on blue sky.

[Alana Glaser]

Oh.

[Grace O'Malley]

And I was like, is that just another word for Twitter?

[Alana Glaser]

I thought, oh, no, maybe. Maybe it's good. Dick and balls on blue sky.

[Grace O'Malley]

Okay.

[Alana Glaser]

Yeah, that would be too hopeful. I'm too hopeful.

[Grace O'Malley]

I'm signing up.

[Alana Glaser]

When I go home, I'm gonna look into it.

[Grace O'Malley]

I'm interested. That would be cool.

[Alana Glaser]

That would be cool if there was, like, a.

Positive alternative.

For that.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yes, that'd be great.

[Alana Glaser]

I can't believe I brought that up. That's hilarious. Just as, like, a phrase. Yeah. I'm always shocked and I. I, like, haven't seen it in years, but porn on Twitter is crazy.

[Grace O'Malley]

It's crazy.

[Alana Glaser]

Whereas I found on Tumblr, it was less crazy.

[Grace O'Malley]

I was hoping you'd go there. Oh, my God. That was my introduction. And it was beautiful. Yeah, it was.

[Alana Glaser]

That was your introduction?

[Grace O'Malley]

That was my introduction. I'm turning 27.

[Alana Glaser]

Copy that. I'm 38.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yes. Okay.

[Alana Glaser]

So, yeah, Tumblr was so sexual. But there was something at Least in my. Whatever I was like, viewing that was like much more queer, actually. Hot.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah.

[Alana Glaser]

And not. I don't know, the presentation was less violent in Twitter, but it is shockingly. The porn on Twitter is shocking. And I haven't like, I forgot. I literally forgot because I was like, what are you talking about?

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah, me too.

No, I've never went to Twitter for my porn. I just know this is me being honest. I've like, I know people are on there for that Tumblr. I was seeking it out.

[Alana Glaser]

Yeah.

[Grace O'Malley]

There was one girl in my high school who had like, not many people had a Tumblr, but this one girl had it. And I knew she would, like, repost some things that would lead me to another thing, but I would. In my Catholic guilt of it all, I would never just type it in. I always had to go through different usernames to track it. And I knew how to get there.

[Alana Glaser]

So sweet. Like a map. Oh my gosh. In your 20s, I'm like, remembering the, like, sorting through of your child and adolescent sexuality and how, like, haunted it is.

[Grace O'Malley]

Oh, yeah, 100A.

[Alana Glaser]

Cuz you still carry that guilt. Whereas in my later 30s, now it's like, I guess it's like cute and quaint, you know, where I'm like, of course. Of course you did. And of course you had that OCD where you're like, if I don't type it, Jesus won't see me.

[Grace O'Malley]

Jesus won't know how I feel. My mother finds out and. And. And God himself. Yeah, it is funny that way. You just said, like, because I'm in like my middle to later twenties and I'm like, just finally able to say out loud these things and you're like, this is adorable.

[Alana Glaser]

Yes.

[Grace O'Malley]

And I can't wait to get there, you know?

[Alana Glaser]

And also, like, I started comedy when I was 19. How old were you?

[Grace O'Malley]

I'm 22.

[Alana Glaser]

22, yeah. So. And I also came to. I came to college, I went to NYU from Long island knowing I wanted to do this. And it was almost like my secret because I didn't want to tell my parents that I was going to like, allocate their money as a day job for me to pursue comedy at night.

[Grace O'Malley]

Were they supportive otherwise?

[Alana Glaser]

No, they were scared. They didn't know this industry at all and didn't know that there's like a business behind the art and if you link them, then you can make a life.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah. Yeah.

[Alana Glaser]

You know, I know it's hard to.

[Grace O'Malley]

You can't explain that.

[Alana Glaser]

Yeah.

[Grace O'Malley]

You just have to tell them to trust you.

[Alana Glaser]

Yeah. And it's funny. Like, you have to just, like.

Have faith in yourself. And it's like, it's so scary. Did you have a similar situation?

[Grace O'Malley]

I. I always wanted to do stand up. So when I moved here, I started doing open mics and it was like 2020. And I know. I'm so sorry, bitch.

[Alana Glaser]

And how old were you? 22.

[Grace O'Malley]

20, 21. 22.

[Alana Glaser]

Oh, my God, Covid, you're like, through a fucking N95. You're, like doing the fucking, like putting the mic up your fucking mask. All right, guys. Yeah, yeah. So I thought, you know, it's like holding your breath. You're like, I went to the gym.

[Grace O'Malley]

I have it in my set. It's like I kind of started off with right now is the. The best joke I had is the worst joke you'll ever hear. And it was about getting bad habits during quarantine. And I thought this was funny. This was my best one. Yeah, I picked up a bad habit myself. I got addicted to chemo.

That's. Yeah, that's it.

[Alana Glaser]

Did you have cancer?

[Grace O'Malley]

No, no, no, no, not at all. I just was like, yeah. What's like something outlandish that you definitely can't get addicted to? Yeah, yeah. You know, they're not all winners.

[Alana Glaser]

No, no, it is.

[Grace O'Malley]

And that was my first one.

[Alana Glaser]

It's all good. It makes sense.

[Grace O'Malley]

It got better from there, I promise.

[Alana Glaser]

Oh, no. It was so bad for me at thing that I was going to say about.

[Grace O'Malley]

I can laugh at it now. It's. It's been five years.

[Alana Glaser]

Totally, totally. And also you're strong to be able to laugh at it. I'm like, give me 10, give me 10. Wait, you mean mine are yours, mine, mine. But I was going to say we were talking about child and adolescent sexuality and processing it later. So I was 19, and it's like I was getting up on stage and talking about sex. Like the. I was like having sex for the, you know, the first time. It was like my first year of having sex. So just like talking about it on stage. I don't know. The processing was different and you could do. There was no smartphones back then, so nobody was recording anything.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah.

[Alana Glaser]

So it was just like such a different way to process yourself and much less self aware, which is good and bad. You know, people are like, Gen Z is not having sex. And it's like, well, the sex we were having in our 20s was sometimes dangerous.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah.

[Alana Glaser]

So maybe it's a good thing also. Yeah, no, also, like, stop talking about Young people having sex.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah, it is weird.

[Alana Glaser]

It's just like, I get it and I don't.

[Grace O'Malley]

You know, I just. I put out a flyer for some of my shows and I used a baby picture, and I got multiple DMs saying, this is gross. Like, you made it gross.

[Alana Glaser]

What do you mean?

[Grace O'Malley]

Like, they're saying I shouldn't have a child. It's me as a promo for my tour. I'm like, wait, it gross?

[Alana Glaser]

In what way is this sexual?

[Grace O'Malley]

In some way, they're making it sexual.

[Alana Glaser]

This is gross. This is sexual.

[Grace O'Malley]

Like, they're. I'm like, this is a baby picture of myself.

[Alana Glaser]

You made it naked. What are they making? No, no. This is so sick.

[Grace O'Malley]

Like, that's where it gets all twisted. I'm like, it's very simple.

[Alana Glaser]

This sort of, like, you know, I. I don't even know the. The white Christian nationalism or the alt extreme ism. The way that it sexualizes everybody and then demonizes sex is so crazy. I was thinking about this last night, actually, that, like, I heard. Do you know the I've had it podcast?

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah. Yeah.

[Alana Glaser]

I'm obsessed. I'm so comforted by them. And they just mentioned something about the. I. I guess I don't even want to say, like, I don't even want the word maga. I don't even want it in my mouth. You know what I mean? So I'm just gonna say, like, the hateful propaganda machine, like, this, like, propaganda machine, like, talks about Taylor Swift submitting to her husband or whatever, that they said it on the I've had it podcast. And it's like, you're actually obsessed with Taylor Swift. You want her sexually. You know, she's a genius creatively and in business, and you actually want her and the. The turning of it around to, like, try to diminish her and try to make it hateful is just. Is so transparent. But it's the same thing with queer people, with trans people. You are sexualizing this hate machine. This hate messaging machine sexualizes all of us when we don't care what's happening in their pants, what's happening in their bedrooms. It's. It's so twisted. And, like, I find as. As you know, you know, steady as my values are and as brilliant as our community is here in New York, the comedy community, I still have to, like, remember it and say it out loud because it's like you. I see, like, you know, images of, like, Taylor Swift, and they're, like, saying stuff, and I'm like, what? And then it's like, no, you're just literally obsessed with her, and the only way you how to express it is through violence. Sexual violence.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah. No, it. It is out of control.

[Alana Glaser]

That is crazy. I'm so sorry that happened to you.

[Grace O'Malley]

No, it's okay.

[Alana Glaser]

I just, like. No, it's not okay. It's sick and twisted. And then you're holding your inner child. You know, I, like, think of us as, like, trees and tree rings. Like, your little baby is in there.

[Grace O'Malley]

Oh, that's a beautiful way of taking that little baby.

[Alana Glaser]

Grace is in there and is being sexualized, and then you're to blame for it. It's the same thing I'm talking about with Taylor Swift.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah.

[Alana Glaser]

Sexual violence toward you for your own choice. You have the choice. It is your image and it is your likeness. You have the choice to do what you want with your baby image, with your baby self inside. That is fucking crazy, dude. I'm sorry.

[Grace O'Malley]

It's just. It's just out of control. I say it's okay because I know how outlandish it is. But, like, the way of thinking is so twisted and so many people right now, like, it's just.

[Alana Glaser]

It's so harmful and it's still cutting. It's. It still hurts us, even if we know better.

[Grace O'Malley]

It does. And we. And we kind of. Like I say this, and like, I loosely say this, but we do kind of live in a utopia in the sense of we kind of all have the same idea here where, like, in New York, like, we're all kind of on the same page for the most part. Ish. And then you go out to other parts of the country. Even I go home and I'm like, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. I thought we were buddies. Like, how I. My buddies. I thought my buddies would have, you know, good. A good moral high ground here. And they're just like, no. Yeah, we do not agree on this. And it's, like, disheartening.

[Alana Glaser]

Yeah. Okay.

[Grace O'Malley]

But you can not agree with people, which is fine on. On. On some things, but I take a strong stance on. On quite a few.

[Alana Glaser]

Yeah. I want to. I want to push back on this.

[Grace O'Malley]

A little bit because I'm also a baby.

[Alana Glaser]

What do you mean?

[Grace O'Malley]

I just think years. You have a good sense of self, and I haven't quite found that yet. And you're, like, very educated on a lot topics, and so I kind of just willy nilly.

[Alana Glaser]

No.

[Grace O'Malley]

Okay.

[Alana Glaser]

No.

[Grace O'Malley]

All right, cool. No. Rock on.

[Alana Glaser]

Nope.

[Grace O'Malley]

Hell yeah.

[Alana Glaser]

No, no.

I'm just incorrected. I'm just Older than you. I also, you know, lived in a more analog life for longer. This digital hellscape that we're having to be a part of because it's linked to capitalism and making money is the way to. Is a. An organizing principle of how to move through this world. So we're, like, kind of stuck in a way, although we can free ourselves in other ways. However, AOL came out when I was nine, so the Internet invaded my home when I was nine. Yeah. But smartphones, I got to do, stand up for a few years and comedy without smartphones recording everything.

[Grace O'Malley]

Oh, that's huge.

[Alana Glaser]

So a bigger proportion of my life has been analog, and I am older than you. And, like, Broad City was like a show on that came out at a time on Wednesdays at 10:30.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah.

[Alana Glaser]

Like, I don't even. TV doesn't really. It's a totally different.

[Grace O'Malley]

The only time anyone's watching anything live anymore is sports and award shows, right? Yeah, like, when it comes out.

[Alana Glaser]

That's right.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah.

[Alana Glaser]

And I also, you know, I've had a partner for 13 years. I have a kid, so I just happen to be older than you. Okay. I'm also a baby. I unravel, I collapse. I get, you know, my spirit gets thwarted. You know, it's just ups and downs.

[Grace O'Malley]

Just being a human.

[Alana Glaser]

Just being a human. We are so dehumanized because if we, like, the more we connect with our humanity, the more likely capitalism is to stop. Right. Because it's, like, dehumanizing and.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah. It's like when you. Sorry, no, no, please, please. But it's like when you. It's like when you do shrooms and you want to put your phone away.

[Alana Glaser]

Oh, yeah.

[Grace O'Malley]

That's kind of like a. A correlation I have. Like.

[Alana Glaser]

Yes.

[Grace O'Malley]

Like, once you've. Like, once you realize that you, like, the. The money is, like, the root of all the evil and all that jazz and, like, we need to connect more as people. It's kind of the same thing as, like, that.

[Alana Glaser]

That's exactly right. I turn my phone off when it gets dark because it literally scares me, and I am scared.

And I do.

[Grace O'Malley]

That's a great idea.

[Alana Glaser]

Yes. It is. So good for your mental health. Just make sure if you're working a woman who lives alone or a person who lives alone, you know, you have some sort of communication available in case of emergency.

[Grace O'Malley]

Get a landline.

[Alana Glaser]

Yeah.

[Grace O'Malley]

Brought to you by Verizon.

[Alana Glaser]

Yeah. Or. Or like a dumb phone. I'm interested in those dumb phones.

[Grace O'Malley]

What's a dumb phone?

[Alana Glaser]

It's Like a non trackable, just not a smartphone. You have, you have maybe a gps or you can like not do a gps, but you just have a number and it's just a phone.

[Grace O'Malley]

Hell yeah.

[Alana Glaser]

And I also don't do social media on the weekends. I like, I started turning my phone off Friday to Saturday for Shabbat and then I was like, I'm doing it every night. It's like contagious. It grows and grows. Our humanity like, grows. And then I was just like, I actually, I used to be like, it's hard. I want to peek at Instagram. Now I'm like, don't make me get on until Monday morning because it is part of my work. Yeah, but I want to, like, respond to some of the things you said because I've been really.

Machinating.

[Grace O'Malley]

Sounds like a great word.

[Alana Glaser]

A word on, you know, like how we got here. And the conservatives have won the battle, the culture battle. They are in charge at the federal level, Supreme Court and like tv, even if Jimmy Kimmel's coming back tonight, like, they're, they're encroaching and rapture, pending. Rapture.

But.

You said that, that was the first thing. Okay, you said we live in a utopia here. First of all, we brave New York City, which is filled with literal garbage where people are suffering so much. Good, hard working people are suffering so much. It's not easy to walk around and see people suffering. And I'm paying taxes out of my asshole. And that's not helping these people. It's, it's infuriating. It is not easy. And also, what's our, what's our shared mentality? As though, you know, like the hate machine, the hate propaganda machine has said. Coastal elites. Coastal elites. Fox News is filmed in midtown. These people are multi millionaires. We have to live with that too. And what's the, what's the utopian.

Perspective that is so homogenous that we see human rights? That's not, that's not, that is not. Like, I like the Bills and you like the Giants. I don't know if they play the same sports. That's not the same. It's not the same thing. Believing that everybody, that there should be a global standard for basic human rights is not like a, a, a side of a game you believe in. That is a baseline fucking human common sense. That is not, you know, like what politics is supposed to be is like, should we charge smokers more money and then give that money to education or should we do it on alcohol? It's supposed to be boring. Paper pushing minutia that creates a system that makes everybody at least live.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah. At least make it a little easier.

[Alana Glaser]

Not even easier. We're all supposed like humanity. And if you really do believe in God, which I do, then you really do believe that everybody deserves good food, clean water, clean air, clothes, shelter, and to not get bombed and physically or sexually abused. Yeah, it's pretty simple.

[Grace O'Malley]

It's so simple.

[Alana Glaser]

Like, even if you may not like other kinds of people, you may be a white person who lives in a white town and love it, but you don't get to. Or I mean, you do now, unfortunately, but you shouldn't get to control the way other people live. Everybody should have a basic standard of human rights. And I think that this is like a global consciousness that ironically enough, like this like toxic social media that like, you know, they can just fine tune the dials on that algorithm and make us insane in the drop of a hat. But initially social media, and you are too young to remember this. People were sharing art.

[Grace O'Malley]

Girl.

I remember the art.

[Alana Glaser]

They were sharing paintings. Instagram. And you were around for the beginning of Instagram before it was bought by Mark Zuckerberg on Facebook. Instagram was invented algorithm.

[Grace O'Malley]

It went, it went chronological. You got to see all your buddies all the time.

[Alana Glaser]

All your buddies.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah.

[Alana Glaser]

And I do think that, you know, having that global consciousness, what naturally arose was everybody feeling like, well, you know, we should at least, everybody should at least not be bombed all the time there. I do believe, I do have faith, that that is the majority of the world. Because the majority of the world isn't billionaires who are controlling everything.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah.

[Alana Glaser]

I think the majority of the world like shares a common sense, but our reality is being systematically fractured to make us like at war with each other. But really they are at war with us. We're not even at war with them. You know what I mean?

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah, like we didn't, we didn't ask for this. We're not.

[Alana Glaser]

I'm also like, do your yachts and yeah, just, just pay the off. Yeah, just pay the taxes that come with that. Like you should pay for your carbon footprint. But what do you care? Your, your billions continue to compound because the system was just rig that drop in a bucket. But like I don't fucking care. I don't care about your wedding and the people you have. I, I don't care. But I'm non consensually having to like actually take in images of it. But yeah, what I do care about is like the majority of 8 billion people having basic Human rights. So you're not. You're trained to think you're stupid and wrong and asking for too much, but you're not. This isn't even political. This is just basic human rights.

[Grace O'Malley]

And it's so crazy because we've taken basic human rights and that, like, everything you just said, which is just, like, so plain and simple. Fox News takes that, and they're like these radical left, like. And it's just. It blows my mind.

[Alana Glaser]

I know. And it's like. It's just. They're so. It's like. There's, unfortunately, comedy in it where they're like, you're not manly enough for me. As they, like, put on their eyeliner. I'm like, who are. You're the tanner and the blush.

[Grace O'Malley]

I can see your bronzer. And you're the wrong shade. It's always been that. It's always been crazy.

[Alana Glaser]

Like, why wouldn't you hire a professional?

[Grace O'Malley]

You could go into Sephora.

[Alana Glaser]

Yep.

[Grace O'Malley]

And you could just. They have a wand. Yep. And they'll match you. It's so easy.

[Alana Glaser]

It's, like, so easy, dude.

[Grace O'Malley]

It's so.

[Alana Glaser]

I mean, it's just so twisted. But I do think that there's enough people, like you putting yourself out there, putting out a signal, and people, like, receive it as you see.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah.

[Alana Glaser]

See that? And these people who are sexualizing your baby picture off.

[Grace O'Malley]

Just off.

[Alana Glaser]

They're like. It reminds me of Ursula the sea witch and, like, the little, like, boogers at her tentacles. You know what I mean? They're just, like, boogers. They are boogers. Them.

[Grace O'Malley]

That's a good analogy. You definitely have kids.

[Alana Glaser]

Yeah, unfortunately. It's Aladdin and the Little Mermaid. Like, pre children. I am like, this is my. This is my. In my DNA, these, like, Disney movies. And I.

[Grace O'Malley]

What is your favorite?

[Alana Glaser]

Ooh, Aladdin's good. It, like, formed so much of my sexuality. Oh, Aladdin's hot. Jasmine's hot. Unfortunately, I'm attracted to Jafar as well. Like, truly. I was like, he's cool.

[Grace O'Malley]

I was more of a genie gal.

[Alana Glaser]

Yeah, that's the one. I'm not.

[Grace O'Malley]

I like him.

[Alana Glaser]

Yeah. Nice, nice, nice, nice. Oh, my gosh. And also, like, is Robin Williams, like, the talent for the ages? Just intergenerational. Can make you laugh, can make you cry. Just in his voice.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah.

[Alana Glaser]

He just gave himself.

[Grace O'Malley]

I'd say. So. Like, also, like, you see, Billy Joel had a documentary come out this summer.

[Alana Glaser]

Oh, I didn't see it. And I heard it was, like, chronologized through his wives.

[Grace O'Malley]

It was interesting in that sense. Yeah. Which actually, I didn't realize until just now.

[Alana Glaser]

My parents, they said it as though that was the hook.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah, it was kind of. Yeah, it was kind of.

Well, probably because they were in the tabloid so much, so they're intrigued. They're like, well, I've been dying to know what happened with them, you know, like.

[Alana Glaser]

And I just. I kind of love it. Like, Billy Joel, through the women he partnered with is brilliant to me. Not. Not in a diminutive way, is my sense. What'd you think?

[Grace O'Malley]

Well, I thought it was great. But the thing about Billy Joel is that he's also generational. Like, he's been going since, like, my. Like, my grandma can enjoy him, my mom can enjoy him, I can enjoy him. I'm sure the next generation can. It's, like, great. Like, there's some people where it's just.

[Alana Glaser]

I'm from Long Island. Where are you from?

[Grace O'Malley]

I'm from Boston. And nobody wants to admit that we're very similar.

[Alana Glaser]

Oh, I believe, like, we.

[Grace O'Malley]

We. We have similar traits.

[Alana Glaser]

Totally.

[Grace O'Malley]

I. I think it's just the. The accent is just, like, a little.

[Alana Glaser]

Yeah.

[Grace O'Malley]

A little flipped.

[Alana Glaser]

Yeah. And also, like, the. The crazy white people are definitely pretty much exactly the same.

[Grace O'Malley]

They're. They're all locked in. I mean, Massachusetts is a blue state, but so is New York. And there are those little sections, right? Yeah.

[Alana Glaser]

Well, outside of the city. It's over.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah.

[Alana Glaser]

Yeah. It's over, babe. The thing with Long island is that. That it's an island. So as you get closer to.

[Grace O'Malley]

It's a peninsula.

[Alana Glaser]

Well, I was just gonna say I was like, long Island's a peninsula. And I was like, it's an island that you grew up on. But, like, people say Jersey and Long island is. Are the same, but I find that Jersey being connected to the mainland as well as Boston make it more sane.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah.

[Alana Glaser]

Whereas Long Island. The further you go out to the dick tip, the crazier everybody gets. Yeah.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah.

[Alana Glaser]

Let's face it.

[Grace O'Malley]

Everyone's juggling long, busy days.

[Alana Glaser]

That's why Icebreakers gum is made for the go getters. With flavor crystals that deliver a bold cooling effect, Icebreakers keeps you refreshed and.

[Grace O'Malley]

Ready to take on whatever's next. And here's a bonus.

[Alana Glaser]

The pack fits perfectly in your car.

[Grace O'Malley]

Cup holder, or bag, so it's within.

[Alana Glaser]

Reach when you need it most. Grab icebreaker scum online or at a store near you.

[Grace O'Malley]

Hey, guys, let's chit chat about our flirty friends over at Tinder. They have this new feature that is actually rocking because it really makes your personality stand out on your profile. And I think this is going to definitely help me out for sure because, you know, I've got my best pictures and then I've got my best tags. And when you can make your picture also be funny or reveal your personality, I think it makes for a better match. So Tinder just launched its new photo prompt feature that's changing the Crush game and making it easier for you to be your authentic self next to your already stunning photos. You have the option to include a prompt like my villain origin story or pov, you just met me. Be silly. Be deep. Be the mysterious cool person who occasionally has bangs. It's your journey, Tinder. It starts with the swipe Download Tinder today. New Balance. You see them everywhere. And if you don't already own a pair, you probably wondered, do I need some? The answer is yes. And start with The New Balance 1080, the ultimate running shoe that combines comfort, performance and style. They're versatile whether you're race training or running errands. I particularly. I'm running errands. I'm not really training for any races anytime soon, but they're extremely breathable and can keep your feet cold. And they are truly so comfortable. I mean that I'm not just reading that. I truly believe that they are the most comfortable shoe around town. They're cushioned, supportive, lightweight, and secure. What more could you really ask for? I'll say shop the [e-mail].

I've have you ever, like, went out to the Hamptons?

Yeah, I like, went out. I went to. I went to Montauk. Totally different over the summer. And like, the fisherman, like, side of town of all that stuff. Love it.

[Alana Glaser]

Adoring the fisherman.

[Grace O'Malley]

It's like, it's like good guys, local guys, like all that jazz. But then I went back a second time and I saw it to the Hamptons. I saw the money. I felt I like my whole life when you're a little kid, like, when I grow up, I want to be a big. I want to be rich.

[Alana Glaser]

Yep.

[Grace O'Malley]

And I saw it and it made me sick.

[Alana Glaser]

Yes.

[Grace O'Malley]

And I never thought because, like, I didn't think I really could get, like, in my head, I've always been like, yeah, more money. Keep the money going. I really. There is too much.

[Alana Glaser]

There is too much.

[Grace O'Malley]

There can be too much. It's freaky.

[Alana Glaser]

It's really. You feel unsafe out there.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah.

[Alana Glaser]

And it's like, remember the beginning of get out the cold open.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yes.

[Alana Glaser]

When Lakeith Stanfield gets abducted. I'm like, that's a Hamptons.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yes.

[Alana Glaser]

And I've become like really increasingly obsessed with Ina Garten, who's like the queen of the Hamptons.

But I'm torn.

[Grace O'Malley]

Who's Anna Garten?

[Alana Glaser]

She's like the cute.

Chef woman. Jewish chef woman.

[Grace O'Malley]

Okay, gotcha. Was it?

[Alana Glaser]

Oh, barefoot contestant.

[Grace O'Malley]

Oh, rock on. Okay, gotcha. Yeah, that's all I need to know.

[Alana Glaser]

Yeah, yeah, she's. She's like woman after my own heart. Yeah, she's Hampton says. But the thing is, like, how manicured her land is, like, kind of creeps me out. And then when she drives, I want to just be in the house with Ina Garten. I don't want to be out in the Hamptons.

[Grace O'Malley]

It's.

[Alana Glaser]

It's so freaky. It feels unsafe.

[Grace O'Malley]

It is. Yeah. No, I just like, I'm like bright eyed and bushy tailed. I never thought I would even be in the Hamptons, like as a kid. And then you go out there and it's the way some people act. It's bizarre.

[Alana Glaser]

Yeah. It's an entire system.

[Grace O'Malley]

I also found out it's very rude to ask what people do. Cause us common folk. So what do you do? You're not allowed to do that if you're in a mansion.

[Alana Glaser]

Apparently you're supposed to know. Is that right?

[Grace O'Malley]

You're either supposed to know or they're going to eventually tell you anyways. But I just like, like we talked about, like I kind of tell on myself. And so we're at this mansion and I go up to the guy and I was like, oh, like, beautiful house. Thank you so much for having us. Is it rude to ask you what you do? He was like, yes, it is. And I looked him up. He owns everything.

[Alana Glaser]

Yeah.

[Grace O'Malley]

Like, it's dirty money. It was. I felt I was like, I'm going to probably go home soon.

[Alana Glaser]

It's really, it's. It's interesting. Like when you're younger and being exposed. When I went to college, when I went to nyu, that was the first time, like I grew up with if that was the first time that I saw bigger.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah. Like, because you'll go to like these parties, like NYU parties, right?

[Alana Glaser]

No, no, not really. I was more focused on starting my comedy career.

[Grace O'Malley]

Oh yeah. You were honing your craft but literally.

[Alana Glaser]

Sharing the elevator with people. Everybody's like, dad was a director. Like, oh, you know, like, oh, fuck. Like I had never seen that kind of money before. And it was really, it was violent, you know, it Felt violent. And everybody's like. So I remember being like, how are they so clean? Yeah, I got clean, clean days.

[Grace O'Malley]

Clean.

[Alana Glaser]

Because they're getting new clothes constantly.

[Grace O'Malley]

It has always blown my mind. How are you so clean?

[Alana Glaser]

And it's like. Yeah. And then they just, whatever, cycle through and.

[Grace O'Malley]

And they have like all the products. They get all the. They can do. They can do that. They've got it going on.

[Alana Glaser]

Yeah, it's, it's, it's many, many, many legs up. Impossible. Impossible to catch up with.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah.

[Alana Glaser]

But when I grew up, it was like a lot of mafia. Did you mafia growing up?

[Grace O'Malley]

We. We mafia in the family.

[Alana Glaser]

Copy that.

[Grace O'Malley]

Oh, yeah.

[Alana Glaser]

Like Boston.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah.

[Alana Glaser]

So that was the kind of money I saw. But that's not really like systemic.

[Grace O'Malley]

I like, I like mafia money because it's like grit.

[Alana Glaser]

Agreed, agreed. Like, agreed.

[Grace O'Malley]

You gotta, you know, there's some, There's a muscle being moved.

[Alana Glaser]

Yeah. You know, 100. Yeah. Moved in many ways.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah. Getting your hands dirty.

[Alana Glaser]

Yeah. But so, yeah, it's just like. So I'm remembering like my first exposure to that. But that's like really creepy. You're like in a house where you're.

[Grace O'Malley]

Like, this is so cool.

[Alana Glaser]

And then you're like, oh, dangerous.

[Grace O'Malley]

I came back to like, I came to and I was like, oh, actually fudge this. Yeah, I'm good.

[Alana Glaser]

And like, even though it's painful, this is the like step by step links creating like the chain of who you are in your 20s.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah.

[Alana Glaser]

And like, look at the reaction you had. That was like filled with common sense. A common, A shared sense of what is good.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah. I also, and I think I have a good head on my shoulders nowadays because I felt that and I was like, as soon as I go home, I want to write down how I feel so that we never. I'd love to be very, very rich one day, but not that rich. And also remember how it makes other people feel. All that jazz, you know what I mean? Like, I just wanted to remember how I felt in that moment so you don't turn into that monster person.

[Alana Glaser]

You won't because you're a thinking and feeling person.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah.

[Alana Glaser]

You know, it's.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah. That's how the rich get richer. It's by being cheap and of course, just having no heart.

[Alana Glaser]

Yeah. And wanting to be separate. It's like, I don't love waiting in a line, but like, as a comedian, it's like funny to see what people do, to see how people are. To chat with people, see how much people want to share or whatever. And then like you get to the end of line, you get up to the thing and it's like we shared something.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah.

[Alana Glaser]

You know, but like people who like, never want to sit in a line, never want to face other people, have their bodies move with other people, private jets. So you're not like sharing space with most people. So you forget, you know, you just.

[Grace O'Malley]

Lose all sense of humanity. And now you're just around a bunch of other assholes and it's, it's a whole runaround.

[Alana Glaser]

Yeah, it's tough. It's tough. But it's like so awesome to hear your values.

[Grace O'Malley]

Oh yeah, 100%. And I'm, I'm, I'm pretty strong on them.

[Alana Glaser]

Yeah.

[Grace O'Malley]

Like, you know, but yeah, you gotta be. You gotta be. Have you ever had like a crazy Hollywood run in.

[Alana Glaser]

What do you mean?

[Grace O'Malley]

Like, like, like a story where you're like this, this was a, this was a strange series of events, you know.

[Alana Glaser]

It'S just like I've been in like truly in the business, I guess. I was 24 when we sold the first script.

[Grace O'Malley]

When you. So you were 24 when you first sold the first script and you've said that you thought you were too nice at the time.

[Alana Glaser]

Too nice? What does that mean?

[Grace O'Malley]

Did you say that?

[Alana Glaser]

I don't remember saying that, but it's certainly, certainly possible.

[Grace O'Malley]

Maybe I screwed up my research.

[Alana Glaser]

But also, how could a 24 year old. You're a kid. Of course I was too nice. I don't know what that means.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah, I might have screwed this up, I don't think. Sorry.

[Alana Glaser]

Rapture. Rapture Police.

[Grace O'Malley]

Saved by the rapture.

[Alana Glaser]

Wait, you didn't screw anything up. Up at all. It's also very likely that I said it and have no recollection.

[Grace O'Malley]

Overly friendly. Sorry. Sorry.

[Alana Glaser]

You know what? I, I, that, that's such a, feels like a general statement to me because I'm like. Young women are always not, not always, but always overly friendly because we're trained to feel unworthy and we feel we have to make up for it in ways and we, we fear that if we're, if we have any boundary or push up against any edge, we will be punished. Which often is true.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah.

[Alana Glaser]

But then I will say that you like find your way to an even higher power after that. But I'm wondering what it specifically means to you.

[Grace O'Malley]

I guess I'm just curious of. Is there anything, if you were to go back to 24 and selling that first script, is there anything you would have changed at all?

[Alana Glaser]

No, I've done so Much therapy that I don't really want to, like, change anything. I don't, like, regret something or, like, see things as a mistake. It's, like, all part of a process of getting here. But, I mean, like, while that was a. I'm trying to, like, sniff out the thing that you need from me right now, and I want to give it to you.

[Grace O'Malley]

Well, basically, I. I think advice, maybe as when you were 24.

[Alana Glaser]

Well, the advice is, like, infuriating because I'm like, do it. Keep doing exactly what you're doing. Keep doing exactly what you're doing. You won't always trust you, but trust me. You are correct. Like, clearly, you have a good heart. You can communicate. You have a good head on your shoulders. You know that. You know enough to know that you can communicate your values. You're doing everything right.

[Grace O'Malley]

You're really good because you sussed out that that was for me personally and not for the show.

[Alana Glaser]

I mean, but that's what I want to fucking give. And that's also, like, what this is right now, and I'm loving it. I'm fucking eating it up, girl.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah, baby. I'm gonna make the best podcast host of all damn time.

[Alana Glaser]

Will you be on it?

[Grace O'Malley]

I would.

[Alana Glaser]

Oh, my God. Yeah.

[Grace O'Malley]

Don't make me cry. We'd love to have you.

[Alana Glaser]

Oh, we'd love to have you.

[Grace O'Malley]

I loved watching you on. Good hang, you guys. It was so beautiful. You just couldn't stop crying.

[Alana Glaser]

Oh, my God.

[Grace O'Malley]

Oh.

[Alana Glaser]

Every time Abby and I get together, I am. We're crying, we're crying. It feels so good. Broad City was so incredible. Such a miracle that it exists and existed, but it was so hard, and we were so hard on ourselves. And now to have, like, the space to be, like, soft together. We're crying left, right. The tears are like, you know, the old Acme cartoons. I don't know what, but the tears are, like, spraying.

[Grace O'Malley]

It's. It's just like. It's like you're at that point. You're at the. The.

At the end of the line. Like, you, like, the finish line, and you can finally look back and just be like, that was awesome.

[Alana Glaser]

That was incredible. And also, like, with Amy to, like, sort of. I mean, she's. Amy is my hero.

[Grace O'Malley]

I had no idea that. So her production company was under.

[Alana Glaser]

She was an episode. She was an executive producer.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah.

[Alana Glaser]

And, like, really, like, mothered that whole experience. Oh, my gosh.

[Grace O'Malley]

She also mentioned that you guys taught her how to, like, love herself, too, which is. Oh, I could cry right now.

[Alana Glaser]

Oh, My God. Do it.

[Grace O'Malley]

It's so sweet.

[Alana Glaser]

But I was gonna say she, like, loves tears and loves crying. It's so cute. She, like, gets giggly around tears when you cry. She loves it so much.

[Grace O'Malley]

It was like, the opposite of, like, a.

Sad. Sadist. Sadist. Sadist. Sadistic.

[Alana Glaser]

Sadist.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah, yeah.

[Alana Glaser]

Sadist or sadistic.

[Grace O'Malley]

I just learned that word.

[Alana Glaser]

Yeah, cool. Fucking use it. Fucking using that vocabulary.

[Grace O'Malley]

Using that word.

[Alana Glaser]

Using that word. Yeah. It's so. It's so sweet. And, like, how. How happy she was that the tears were flowing was so great.

[Grace O'Malley]

It's so sweet.

[Alana Glaser]

Yeah, she, you know, like, the validation she gave us. So we made. We made 35 short films over the course of two years. We were.

[Grace O'Malley]

Holy. Over two years.

[Alana Glaser]

Yeah. We were obsessed. We would. We really created a playbook for what we would experience in the TV series. Like, we would block shoot, meaning shoot many different parts, many different episodes or webisodes in the same location. Okay. We're using Lana's bedroom for this episode and this episode. So let's film it in the same room.

[Grace O'Malley]

I'll do it all right here. Yeah.

[Alana Glaser]

And we didn't know that's what block shooting was. You gets it making tv and it's like, oh, we've been here before. And our.

[Grace O'Malley]

Oh, go ahead. Sorry. Nyu. Is that what you were studying?

[Alana Glaser]

No, no. I didn't have the grades or money to go to Tisch.

[Grace O'Malley]

Oh, gotcha. Okay.

[Alana Glaser]

I was.

[Grace O'Malley]

Tish is like. Is the.

[Alana Glaser]

Tish is like, I guess TV and film and acting.

[Grace O'Malley]

Okay.

[Alana Glaser]

And I, like, wanted so bad to be in it. And then I was, like, in the comedy scene, and it was like, oh, this is my Tish.

[Grace O'Malley]

Oh, my God.

[Alana Glaser]

Yeah. I got in by, like, the skin of my teeth. Dan, why? You, like, financial aid, early decision, like, so desperate.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah.

[Alana Glaser]

You know what I mean? Like, you get in.

[Grace O'Malley]

I just want to let you know I really want to come. I'll be right here.

[Alana Glaser]

Exactly. And. And also the general studies program, I didn't get into, like, a normal school. I got into this school that was, like, pretty much for, like, public school kids to catch up to the private school kids.

[Grace O'Malley]

Oh, shit. Which is really helpful.

[Alana Glaser]

I didn't have.

[Grace O'Malley]

Because they are a lot more advanced. It's like, a crazy realization.

[Alana Glaser]

And they also, like, know what a private school education is, which is what NYU is. But I didn't. Which is its own education. But I didn't. I really didn't know how to read and write and talk about stuff in an academic way. And it was cool. And I, like, kind of want to do it now. You know what I mean? Like, one class. I was thinking about it last night. Like, I. I would love to read.

[Grace O'Malley]

A book and talk about it with a group. This book club. You don't have to. You don't have to do the whole song and dance if you don't want to.

[Alana Glaser]

But I literally want homework. I'm such a nerd. Oh, my God. I'm like, can we all write papers? Can we be tasked?

[Grace O'Malley]

These Sundays are too breezy.

[Alana Glaser]

So what? So I got. I was at NYU and so blocking.

[Grace O'Malley]

So I was just curious, like, you.

[Alana Glaser]

Did I study it? No. So, like, we just, like, kind of were scrappy and. And really reaching out to the comedy community for. Who wants to, like, get on set? Experience. Who has experience editing, who has equipment? And it just, like, came together, and we became so focused on it that we would, like, shoot four episodes in a weekend, plan the next episodes the next weekend. We were so turned on by this process, you know, and it had its own momentum.

[Grace O'Malley]

And so, like, these are just, like, buddies you have in the scene. And so, like, a camera guy. You, like. You always want, like, the same camera guy. Well, did you have, like, the same camera guy? No. You switch them out or.

[Alana Glaser]

No, we would just take whoever could do it.

[Grace O'Malley]

Oh, gotcha. Okay.

[Alana Glaser]

And, like, at first, it was, like, this community effort, and then we were, like, paying people $100 because we were like, we at least need to, like, put a number on this and, like, honor your time the best we can, which is a hundred dollars worth.

[Grace O'Malley]

They're still doing a hundred dollars.

[Alana Glaser]

100.

[Grace O'Malley]

The inflation hasn't changed anything, I'll tell you that.

[Alana Glaser]

Oh, it's gone down. The value of the dollar has gone down. I just learned 13 since inauguration today, it's September. The value of the dollar has gone down 13? That's more than 10, y'.

[Grace O'Malley]

All. That's an extra goddamn three.

[Alana Glaser]

Yeah, but the thing with Amy Poehler was that we asked for to do our final webisode, and. And she did. And we studied improv, Abby and I, where we met Upright Citizens Brigade, which is an improv school that Amy founded with her Upright Citizens Brigade collaborators.

[Grace O'Malley]

I didn't know she founded that.

[Alana Glaser]

Yes, girl. I'm like, so with Matt Besser, Matt Walsh, Ian Roberts, and Amy Poehler had a TV show on Comedy Central in, like, a real heyday of Comedy Central, when Jon Stewart was just taking over the Daily show, and. And Chappelle show was getting going a couple years after that, Upright Citizens Brigade And Stranger Things. Excuse me. Strangers with Candy.

Strangers with Candy. Amy Sedaris show Strangers with Candy.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah, I think that's. And that's.

[Alana Glaser]

Even Colbert was on no shit, girl. Like, doing the most inappropriate shit. Cannot believe. Yes. And like, can you believe that? And then Colbert's on Strangers with Candy, and then Jon Stewart takes him to the Daily show, and Chappelle is, like, all intertwined. It's like. It was so incredible. And I was like a child on Long island being like, where is this happening? This is happening in New York City.

[Grace O'Malley]

Smart girl.

[Alana Glaser]

I'm gonna go there and. Yeah, it was just. It was. It was really cool to bring Amy back to Comedy Central after she had NBC'd up. Yeah. And.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah.

[Alana Glaser]

And she did our web series and we really just really got along.

[Grace O'Malley]

That's incredible. I do have to ask because it's just in the back of my head, do you ever get sick of talking about Broad City?

[Alana Glaser]

No.

[Grace O'Malley]

No. Yeah.

[Alana Glaser]

When I was, like, younger and closer to it and hadn't processed it yet, I was just uncomfortable because I didn't know how to be. But these days I am just flying with it.

[Grace O'Malley]

Oh, you absolutely should.

[Alana Glaser]

I'm riding high, not sick of it at all. I love it.

[Grace O'Malley]

It's so great. It's a miracle.

[Alana Glaser]

It's a fucking miracle.

[Grace O'Malley]

I just understand that some people, you know, like, you have like a very. I think I worded that the wrong way.

[Alana Glaser]

No.

[Grace O'Malley]

Some people have a very successful thing that they do, and then they want to move on and do other projects, but when they're in interviews, they keep getting brought back to that.

[Alana Glaser]

Well, I think part of it is that, like, you know, I. I definitely understand if you're an actor plugged into someone else's vision, you're like, can I just be.

[Grace O'Malley]

Oh, yeah, absolutely.

[Alana Glaser]

So this makes sense, but, like, because Abby and I made it and it's so funny. Yeah. I'm like, let's talk about all day. And then also I think I've, like, done enough mental, emotional processing to separate myself from it such that I can look back at it and not be in it. Am I looking at it or am I in it? And I've made enough work now, you know, and had enough, like, professional experiences since it with standup and movies and stuff, that I'm, you know, secure enough to talk about it with.

Such fondness.

[Grace O'Malley]

That's awesome. And had a baby.

[Alana Glaser]

I have a four year old, you know, so I'm like, I get what it means to, like, it feels like five babies, five seasons. Of Broad City. It feels like five babies.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah. Oh, wow. Yeah. That's a great way of thinking of it. I didn't even think of that. Your projects are your babies.

[Alana Glaser]

Oh, yeah.

[Grace O'Malley]

And then you've pivoted to more serious roles as well. And so which do you have a preference?

[Alana Glaser]

Like what?

[Grace O'Malley]

Like the thriller movie of which it was called. Positive.

[Alana Glaser]

False positive.

[Grace O'Malley]

False positive. Sorry.

[Alana Glaser]

Yeah. I mean, that was like.

That was more like an expression.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah.

[Alana Glaser]

You know what I mean? That was like my fear of impending motherhood and parenthood.

[Grace O'Malley]

I was wondering.

[Alana Glaser]

It was something about also letting go of Red City, you know what I mean? It was like.

But I. Like, I. I wasn't sure if you meant babes, because I adore babes.

[Grace O'Malley]

I was gonna. I. I couldn't wait to get to that. I adore babes because we have.

[Alana Glaser]

We have, like, heft in it, an emotional heft, and I didn't know what you meant about that, but go on.

[Grace O'Malley]

So you wrote Babes alongside Josh Benowitz. Josh Benowitz. And is there any truth to this story? How did this spark?

[Alana Glaser]

Well, the real. The seed of the truth to the story is the character Claude in the movie who dies is based on me and Josh Rabinowitz's mutual best friend, Kevin Barnett in 2019.

[Grace O'Malley]

Oh, I'm so sorry.

[Alana Glaser]

Oh, it was such a loss.

[Grace O'Malley]

And if he's anything like the character, what. What a gem.

[Alana Glaser]

I. Kevin. Kevin Barnett was a genius, A beautiful genius. He was a genius. And he was Josh's writing partner. And.

I don't know, I. That's, like, kind of how it came up. And. And also, like, that. That was the seed of truth.

Grace, you would have loved him. He would have, like, loved you. Like, I just. The. The loss of our comedy community is the sort of, like, is the thing that I'm like, oh, I can't even communicate it. I can communicate my personal loss and talk to. I was, you know, talk to family and friends, and I was just talking to Kevin's cousin Dwayne, and, you know, we can talk about it, but the comedy community, I'm like, fuck. Wish you knew him. Ah, fuck, fuck, fuck. Just fuck. He was the fucking best. So funny, so smart, so beautiful.

So that was. That was one seed of truth.

[Grace O'Malley]

Did he happen to get a woman pregnant? No, no, he was.

[Alana Glaser]

He was really smart and careful. Women were so in love with him. He didn't know what to do. Like, we were. He didn't know, how do I. What do I do? You know, like, comedians will, especially male comedians because women were like, oh, I don't want to be abused, so I'm going to protect myself. So we don't, like, we don't, like, get the way male comedians get for being so funny and talented.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah, there's not really that much of a clientele.

[Alana Glaser]

No, they're. No, they're there. They're there. I promise they're there. No, I know, like, there, there are like, guys. No, I know.

[Grace O'Malley]

They're a little shaky and weird. They might have something in their pocket. Like.

[Alana Glaser]

Oh, yeah. Like, I. There are people who like funny women who, like, you can get, you can get in a good way by them.

[Grace O'Malley]

Oh, okay. Well.

[Alana Glaser]

But like, you just have to, like, it's almost like you have to take it slower. Guys can, like, take a girl home that night and not be frightened by the end of the experience.

[Grace O'Malley]

Oh, 1,000%. I mean, I, I'll, I'll get an Airbnb. I'll have two openers. And there's, there's girls in the kitchen in the morning. I'm like, hi, girls. Yeah, how we doing? They're like, you're great. Last night I was like, yeah, you were too.

[Alana Glaser]

Yeah. Incredible. I was, like, really impressed.

[Grace O'Malley]

And I don't want to be the. That says, can you guys, like, not at the house.

[Alana Glaser]

No, you can totally be that. Just cuz also, by the way, they're safe to get home. So you can be like, no, go at their place and then come home.

[Grace O'Malley]

That's so true. That's so true.

[Alana Glaser]

It's a boundary.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah.

[Alana Glaser]

That you're totally welcome to have. I'm paying for everything. You're paying for everything.

[Grace O'Malley]

I'm getting an Airbnb so we can spend more time together.

[Alana Glaser]

Don't worry about that. Don't worry about that. No, no. You know, you don't want to spend time.

[Grace O'Malley]

I'm like, boys, we gotta shoot the shit after the show, right? They're like, yeah. And with Tiffany and Britt, too.

[Alana Glaser]

Yeah. No, no, no, no, no, no, no. Also, like, love Tiffany and Britt and they, like, love you. I adore them, but you don't wanna spend time with them.

[Grace O'Malley]

I just don't wanna hear it.

[Alana Glaser]

100%.

Forced to do small talk. You do not have to do that.

[Grace O'Malley]

Like, do you want a pancake? No, I want you to leave.

[Alana Glaser]

Yeah, no, don't have sex. Here is a boundary. You're allowed to have. That's cool.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah, I'm learning this shit.

[Alana Glaser]

Yeah, dude, I'm good. Then the other, like, seed of truth that gave birth to Babes was that me and Josh's manager and producer, Susie Fox, had two little ones, which I did not understand at the time, like, how fucking impossibly hard it is to be a working mom with two little kids. I still don't know it. I'll never know it. Cause I. I would not. I'm not built one and done. Not necessarily, but I am not built to have two kids within two or three years of each other.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah. Holy.

[Alana Glaser]

I couldn't. I couldn't do it. I couldn't do it. So Susie was, like, doing this thing that I just can't imagine, like, how hard it is that. Oh, yeah.

[Grace O'Malley]

Oh, wow.

[Alana Glaser]

And she's, like, such an incredible producer and manager. It's like, I also didn't know how hard it was because she was. She didn't show it. Like, I just had no idea. I had no idea. She's incredible.

[Grace O'Malley]

And that's always the case too. It's like they do it flawlessly, but meanwhile they're losing their shit.

[Alana Glaser]

Yeah.

[Grace O'Malley]

You know?

[Alana Glaser]

Yeah. And I don't even think. I think now she's, like, learned. They're, like, a bit older. They're like, 7 and 9, and she's, like, gotten a handle on how to have a normal. More normal rhythm.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah.

[Alana Glaser]

But at the time, she was just making it happen. And Josh's wife, Annie Sunberg. Hi. Girl. And me were pregnant at the same time. So Susie was like. Susie. And I was post Broad City and Susan. I were talking about comedy movies and how nothing, like, lands or sticks at this point. And there's also, like, a gap, like, wanting more comedies, hard comedies with heart. And she was like, I'm just, like, picturing you and a friend who, like, has two little kids and you get knocked up. And she was like, the Michelle Buteau role. And I was like, well, I'm pregnant. And Josh was like, annie's pregnant. And we were like, we're perfect to write my part, you know? So it was really the truth of the friendship was between the three of us.

[Grace O'Malley]

Oh, wow. That's amazing.

[Alana Glaser]

Where Susie's like, you have no fucking idea. And we were like, we're so excited.

[Grace O'Malley]

So awesome. So it's all happening all at once. So you really were pregnant while filming that?

[Alana Glaser]

No, I was pregnant while writing it.

[Grace O'Malley]

While writing it.

[Alana Glaser]

My daughter was.

[Grace O'Malley]

Which is even better because you have the brain for it. Like, you're fully experiencing it.

[Alana Glaser]

100%.

[Grace O'Malley]

Oh, wow. Yeah.

[Alana Glaser]

And I really took, like, like, four months fully off when my daughter was born, which was incredible. I just Soaked it up. It was incredible.

[Grace O'Malley]

That's amazing. Were you ready to get back after it at the end?

[Alana Glaser]

What'd you say?

[Grace O'Malley]

Ready to get back after it at the end? Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Alana Glaser]

But slowly I, like, transitioned back in and, like, had a whole new understanding of how to be gentle toward myself. Because you have to be so gentle with a little baby all the time.

[Grace O'Malley]

Oh, yeah.

[Alana Glaser]

It was so nice. It was so nice.

[Grace O'Malley]

And it really changes you. That's what they say, right?

[Alana Glaser]

It definitely changes you, but it also, like, brings out the person who's always been there. Oh, she's moved.

[Grace O'Malley]

That therapist.

[Alana Glaser]

Yeah, he's brilliant. He's a shoes. He's a genius, dude. He's a genius. I'm so.

[Grace O'Malley]

You are so. Yeah, I, I can. You just radiate like, I've, I've done the therapy. It's really great.

[Alana Glaser]

And also I'm just, just thrilled to talk to you. So I'm radiating because I'm talking to you.

[Grace O'Malley]

Oh, big ditto.

I lack the therapy, but I'm learning.

[Alana Glaser]

Why. Why do you lack it?

[Grace O'Malley]

I thought I wanted a little girly pop that's like in and around my age that gets like, Internet stuff.

[Alana Glaser]

As a therapist.

[Grace O'Malley]

As a therapist. Girly pop. Girly pop. I was doing bits.

[Alana Glaser]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. I was doing bits.

[Grace O'Malley]

I was trying to get her to laugh as much as I could. She's also like, she's going, yay.

[Alana Glaser]

Yeah, you're getting her.

[Grace O'Malley]

One time, like, seriously, one time she.

[Alana Glaser]

Was like, oh, my God, that is so cute.

[Grace O'Malley]

And so I took a little break.

[Alana Glaser]

Ski. That's really cute. I gotta find a real, I mean, an older person.

[Grace O'Malley]

Not a real, but perhaps a 38.

[Alana Glaser]

Year old, a 40 year old.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah, yeah, 100%.

[Alana Glaser]

When you're ready to come back to it, it's there for you.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah. And I'm actually, I'm more open to it now too, I think, so. It's a great thing. It really is. And Babes was, is one of my favorite movies of all time, Truly and honestly. And the, your character in it, do you relate to that character at all?

[Alana Glaser]

Yeah, yes, definitely. I, I, I did. I mean, totally.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah, yeah, yeah, totally is what I'm saying.

[Alana Glaser]

I mean, she's, she's definitely born out of me the way Alana Wexler is born out of me. I named her after my best friend, Eden.

[Grace O'Malley]

Oh, no way.

[Alana Glaser]

Yeah. And I totally relate to her. Definitely. The hoping that your friend will be your partner in life is something I relate to. And the, and it's definitely like A theme in my work. You know, the. The importance of friendships and how hard we rely on them and how we need them.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah.

[Alana Glaser]

And specifically how women. How women specifically need their friendships is something that I'm just always interested in. And I just like love the awe, the time, the space that we create for awe. To be in awe of the process of childbirth and having a child and the baby itself. I just.

[Grace O'Malley]

Because it's the whole anticipation of you don't know until you know.

[Alana Glaser]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Grace O'Malley]

It is. It is so wild. I was going through.

A long term friendship breakup when I watched your movie and so hard.

It's, it's. That is. But it's to the T. Like you do such a great job nailing female friendships. And so I think that's. There's something to be said where a movie or a TV show or a piece of literature can really make you feel. And you just do such a great job at that. And so I want you to know that you got that human connection thing going on.

[Alana Glaser]

Thank you. Which is very important that humanity, it's like, you know, all this AI shit that like none of us consented to.

[Grace O'Malley]

No, thank you.

[Alana Glaser]

It's just so much propaganda for AI that while every like people are losing jobs and our dollar is getting weakened and like just connecting around humanity keeps me sane and grounded and happy. It's just makes me so happy. I love people.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah. I mean, and more people should. Which is like crazy to say out loud.

[Alana Glaser]

Yeah.

[Grace O'Malley]

Like we should just all, you know, connect with each other a little more.

[Alana Glaser]

I think we do. And.

[Grace O'Malley]

Or maybe too much. Like I. Maybe we do connect to him. Like we see too much of others. You're only. I have this joke I'm working on about. My dad was meant to meet 20 people in his life. That is why he can't retain your friends names.

Hilarious. He's met them all. That's it. He stopped at his kids. That's done.

[Alana Glaser]

That's right. That's right.

[Grace O'Malley]

And now we know thousands and thousands of people for no reason at all.

[Alana Glaser]

Well, for the reason of making the few people who own most of the wealth in the world more money. It's like you can create a profit structure around anything and the profit structure we're unfortunately like stuck inside of simply at this moment is political dividend. And like the overwhelm of like knowing what's happening everywhere and like the wars and horrors happening all around the planet and then the, you know, making us feel helpless is. Is so cruel and not the way it has to Be. It's too much. It's too much. Like, there used to be a thing called high school reunions.

And now I'm having a high school reunion morning, noon and night, Monday through Friday, before I turn Instagram off. I'm just seeing how everybody's fucking doing, and I. Whether they're, you know, happy or miserable, seeing their, like, seeing the people you went to high school's, like, racist views is so upsetting. So upsetting, so disheartening. It's like, there's a guy I know who's, like, super, you know, now alt, right? And it's like, we did gymnastics together, dude. Like, you tumbled.

You tumbled, girl. We did gymnastics, and it, like, felt good to, like, play with you and wrestle with you, and you were a sweetheart, and. And now you're just fucking racist and celebrating buffoonery and hatred.

[Grace O'Malley]

Oh, God, you.

[Alana Glaser]

We both were leotards.

[Grace O'Malley]

We played gymnastics. That is all time.

[Alana Glaser]

We tumbled. We tumbled.

[Grace O'Malley]

We tumbled. We did the splits.

[Alana Glaser]

We did the splits, bro. Like, we were splits. I know, it's so sad. It's so sad.

[Grace O'Malley]

But, like, and now you're split. You are.

[Alana Glaser]

And now we are split.

[Grace O'Malley]

Hey, guys, let's chit chat about our flirty friends over at Tinder. They have this new feature that is actually rocking because it really makes your personality stand out on your profile. And I think this is gonna definitely help me out for sure because, you know, I've got my best pictures and then I've got my best tags. And when you can make your picture also be funny or reveal your personality, I think it makes for a better match. So Tinder just launched its new photo prompt feature that's changing the crush game and making it easier for you to be your authentic self next to your already stunning photos. You have the option to include a prompt like my villain origin story or pov, you just met me. Be silly. Be deep. Be the mysterious, cool person who occasionally has bangs. It's your journey, Tinder. It starts with the swipe. Download Tinder today. New Balance. You see them everywhere. And if you don't already own a pair, you're probably wondered, do I need some? The answer is yes. And start with The New Balance 1080, the ultimate running shoe that combines comfort, performance, and style. They're versatile whether you're race training or running errands. I particularly, I'm running errands. I'm not really training for any races anytime soon, but they're extremely breathable and can keep your feet cold. And they are truly so comfortable. I mean, that I'm not just reading that. I truly believe that they are the most comfortable shoe around town. They're cushioned, supportive, lightweight, and secure. What more could you really ask for? I'll say shop the [e-mail].

I will like to make you giggle real quick. This is going to be our first and only segment.

[Alana Glaser]

Copy that. I love it. Yay. We talked so much.

[Grace O'Malley]

So this is. It's called Disgraceful Receipts. And this is where I. You have a very squeaky clean digital footprint.

[Alana Glaser]

Great.

[Grace O'Malley]

But we did pull some things. This is where.

[Alana Glaser]

So in this.

[Grace O'Malley]

In this we have you just kind of explain some of these photographs.

[Alana Glaser]

Okay.

[Grace O'Malley]

All right.

[Alana Glaser]

Oh, my God.

Oh, my God. I suppose that is a self styled image. Oh, my God. That is so funny.

[Grace O'Malley]

Grace.

[Alana Glaser]

Oh, my God. I like the shoes. They're helmet length. The pants, I don't remember. It's giving. Genie from.

[Grace O'Malley]

It is giving. I didn't want to say I was a little turned on.

[Alana Glaser]

Yeah, yeah. It's giving Aladdin. That is so funny. Gosh, I remember where that's from. So those shoes are from the first season of Broad City. But this look, I don't remember.

[Grace O'Malley]

The carpet's red.

[Alana Glaser]

The carpet is red and I was stepping on it. Having. That is so funny. It's so bad, dude. That's. That's so bad.

[Grace O'Malley]

All right, moving right along.

[Alana Glaser]

Oh, my God.

[Grace O'Malley]

That's so bad.

[Alana Glaser]

I mean, that's hilarious. That's hilarious. You can show that I'm thrilled. So, so, so. Speaking of not having a stylist, not even knowing what a stylist is. Literally thinking. It's like a guest role on Sex in the City and nothing that would ever pertain to me.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah. I thought they only did Runway.

[Alana Glaser]

Yeah, yeah. No clue. So this is the first time Abby Jacobson and I did Jimmy Kimmel for Bread City. He is such a cutie that he had us on fucking goober goofballs for season one and Comedy Central gave us like a thousand bucks total for hair and makeup, which is literal. Literally nothing. Or.

[Grace O'Malley]

Oh, that's nothing.

[Alana Glaser]

Honestly, 800. But. Oh, hair and makeup is anywhere from 500 to $2,000.

[Grace O'Malley]

Oh, yeah, that's right. Yeah.

[Alana Glaser]

And then to buy something that is meant to be on screen is like 2,000 bucks. Like you, dude.

[Grace O'Malley]

This is what you bought.

[Alana Glaser]

So we came up with a. We came up with a gag. To homage. Dumb and Dumber. Awesome. To homage. And I honestly, Abby really drove this one. It was brilliant. To homage.

[Grace O'Malley]

I like credit where credit's due.

[Alana Glaser]

Yes. Oh, yeah.

[Grace O'Malley]

Big on that.

[Alana Glaser]

So Abby's wearing a baby blue suit opposite me, and this. I forget the moment in Dumb and Dumber. No, it's like when they show. It's one of my favorite movies. Jeff Daniels and Jim Carrey, like, showing up in their orange and blue suits and thinking they're gonna, like, get the girl.

So we. This was our, like, truly our only choice. And Jimmy was like.

Like, we, like, we're so not normal.

[Grace O'Malley]

Jimmy's new two at the time, right?

[Alana Glaser]

I think he was on for somewhere from five to 10 years. This looks, I have to say, cut this if it's gonna be seen as mean, but this is giving special needs theater camp.

[Grace O'Malley]

Oh, yeah, totally. 100%. 100%.

[Alana Glaser]

So I went there too.

[Grace O'Malley]

It's like my mom. My mom grabbed me with, like, a cane. Like. Oh.

[Alana Glaser]

Dressed like this, it's almost like. Yes. It's almost like your dress rehearsal. I picked up the baton and got to do the performance.

[Grace O'Malley]

And you know what? I'm a little upset.

[Alana Glaser]

We're connected.

[Grace O'Malley]

Oh, my God. That's incredible. Incredible.

[Alana Glaser]

Oh, my God. I wonder if that is, like, at the moment that you were pulled from dress rehearsal in high school.

[Grace O'Malley]

Literally.

[Alana Glaser]

Dude, we gotta do some recon and find the date. Everything serendipitous. Genius. This is actually genius. I'm embarrassed about the first one, but not this.

Okay. That's me as a baby. Adorable. So cute. And giving my daughter. It's so funny. My daughter is like, does your daughter look like this? Then I am lighter shades because my husband, while half Jewish and from his Jewish side, has, like, black hair and dark hair. The blonde side just took over.

[Grace O'Malley]

Oh, really?

[Alana Glaser]

Even though she is only 25% OG German or something from, like, the 1750s, that these Pennsylvania Dutch aka Germans.

[Grace O'Malley]

Oh, yeah, I've heard about these.

[Alana Glaser]

So even though. Even though These people claim 25% of her jeans, she has. She's, like, super light, and I'm, like, really dark. But we look the same, but have different coloring.

[Grace O'Malley]

It's wild how that happens.

[Alana Glaser]

It's incredible.

[Grace O'Malley]

I'm the only redhead in my family, but it's. It's got to be somewhere down the line.

[Alana Glaser]

You don't know who. You don't know?

[Grace O'Malley]

I mean, no, not my mom, not my sisters, nothing. It's crazy. Not my dad.

[Alana Glaser]

Gorgeous.

[Grace O'Malley]

Oh, here we go.

[Alana Glaser]

Okay. This is a kraptv.

[Grace O'Malley]

Oh, really?

[Alana Glaser]

Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. And I think I'm missing my two front teeth in this picture. Oh, my gosh. Also Bob Dylan. Anybody? Like, literally, like, always Drew throwing from day one. Bob Dylan as dude. Oh, my God.

Actually, I don't know. Not nyu. It. He certainly didn't go to college. But, yeah, I am giving Timothy.

Okay. Cute. I guess I do have a really, like, squeaky clean.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah, you're so clean. I mean, this.

[Alana Glaser]

I love human rights. It's honestly just like. I love human rights.

[Grace O'Malley]

Oh, my God. Sorry. You're just like, so, like, versus a.

[Alana Glaser]

Human being sometimes, like, not styled too well. And then love human rights. So this is for my birthday, I guess. And I believe I'm, like, stuck in the.

Broad City writers room.

And I'm, like, representing fun I would otherwise be having if I weren't working 14 hours a day.

[Grace O'Malley]

Well, we have to do the cake. So we'll do the cake, but we got to get right back to it.

[Alana Glaser]

I'll do a silly. That is literally what happened. And I was like, I'll do a silly style pose and it'll look. My husband says accurately. He's like. And this is like, in our processing since Broad City. He's like, Broad City was like, as though you blacked out and Alana Wexler was your subconscious actually having fun. And then Alana Glaser was, like, working so hard.

[Grace O'Malley]

Severance.

[Alana Glaser]

And like, yeah, it's full of severance. Broad City is my severance, bitch. Spread City is my severance. Yes. And I guess I don't know who's the inn ear. The Addy, to be honest.

[Grace O'Malley]

And that's what therapy's for.

[Alana Glaser]

That's right.

[Grace O'Malley]

That's the next round.

[Alana Glaser]

That's right. So that's fine, though.

[Grace O'Malley]

That's my birthday jam.

[Alana Glaser]

I love carrot cake.

[Grace O'Malley]

It doesn't seem like that would have been your first pick, though.

[Alana Glaser]

No, I love carrot cake.

[Grace O'Malley]

I love it.

[Alana Glaser]

And then I love icebox cake. It's like the, like, dark chocolate cake with the white frosting. Love that.

[Grace O'Malley]

I didn't even know.

[Alana Glaser]

I like cake.

[Grace O'Malley]

Cake. Okay. Oh, hell, yes.

[Alana Glaser]

So cute. Is this okay? Yes. Michael Jackson bad.

[Grace O'Malley]

Absolutely.

[Alana Glaser]

You know, when I was a child in the 90s, which this, I believe is like 1991 or 1992. First of all, I'm so cute and pretty.

[Grace O'Malley]

Oh, my God.

[Alana Glaser]

And I was not told enough. I was not told enough. Yeah. Little brown bunny. I was not told enough. I was so cute and pretty. I'm telling her now. So pretty. So cute and pretty.

But Michael Jackson, like, very sadly was seen as an advocate for children.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah.

[Alana Glaser]

You know?

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah.

[Alana Glaser]

And he, like, yes, sexually abused children, but he also, like, thought he was a child. Like, it is so complicated, and, like, what. What our world did to him was so cruel, but, like, it's so crazy. My brother and I were, like, black. Oh, white.

We, like, spelled felt. So represented by Michael Jackson because he was, like, thinking of us. But you know who was, like, a real safe advocate for children was so. Michael was like, not Mr. Rogers. Mr. Rogers always. But I was gonna say Rosie O'. Donnell.

[Grace O'Malley]

Oh.

[Alana Glaser]

It was like, kind of the same era where they were both speaking up for kids or showing. Showing children at all. Was like, oh, kids are being thought of. But, like, Michael was unfortunately sick.

[Grace O'Malley]

Oh, kid representatives.

They become mine was Ellen, I suppose. Yeah.

[Alana Glaser]

But Ellen didn't abuse kids. She, like, loved kids. She just got like.

[Grace O'Malley]

Well, I mean, they have, like, some. Some kind of repercussion when. I guess when you. You're for all audiences, you're up for all scrutiny.

[Alana Glaser]

I mean, not scrutiny. She, like, created. Created a toxic work environment. And I think also, like, I think it's. It's mentally unwell to be on TV that much.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah.

[Alana Glaser]

And to have that much money is a. Is a symptom of illness.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah. Yeah.

[Alana Glaser]

You know what I mean? Of a sick society. And. And it's like, put on that person. I love Dylan, too. I was obsessed. I would, like, sit and listen to her albums. She was so funny. I watched her show and, like, she.

[Grace O'Malley]

She did. She did great things for the queer community.

[Alana Glaser]

Holy Jesus. We, like, watched her. We watched her sitcom. It was so funny, and she was so cute and pretty and cool. And then when she came out, it, like, gave our family an opportunity to talk about being gay. My brother is gay. My mom and dad, like, we watched the show and, like, going to bed that night, my mom was like, I just want to say, it's okay if you're gay.

[Grace O'Malley]

Oh, that's really sweet.

[Alana Glaser]

Ellen did that for us.

[Grace O'Malley]

Oh, that's really nice.

[Alana Glaser]

I love Ellen. You know, I love the. The icon that is Ellen. I don't know the person.

[Grace O'Malley]

I know it's tricky, but you don't.

[Alana Glaser]

It's not the same as Michael. Michael.

[Grace O'Malley]

No, no, no, no, no, no. God, no. I. I know this. All right, we're going back.

[Alana Glaser]

What am I looking at?

[Grace O'Malley]

We are going back.

[Alana Glaser]

Oh, my God. Improv. This is improv for sure. And this is, like, a broad city. A post broad city. This is so interesting. Like, my back then is now Broad City, which before my. Back then, during Broad City was like, something else. But this is like, during Broad City, I'm proud of my haircut and Clothes. My body looks great in these clothes, so I'm thrilled.

[Grace O'Malley]

It was always those colorful jeans.

[Alana Glaser]

What was always those.

[Grace O'Malley]

Everyone's always wearing those colorful jeans. Like, that was like the. That was it.

[Alana Glaser]

The Obama years.

[Grace O'Malley]

That was it.

[Alana Glaser]

We were like, slap a color on those jeans. It's time to celebrate Obama's president. My jeans are red, baby. This girl's doing it.

[Grace O'Malley]

I got them in all colors.

[Alana Glaser]

These jeans fit. I'm not afraid to smile.

[Grace O'Malley]

So that's genuinely happy. What about you guys?

[Alana Glaser]

Yep. I feel safe at a. At a basic human rights level. Isn't that crazy? I'm gonna throw on some lavender jeans. So that's Arturo Castro and Paul W. Downs flanking me. Chris Gethard and Abby Jacobson, and we are doing an improv show during Broad City. Someone is wearing red jeans behind me. We're not even joking.

[Grace O'Malley]

I'm telling you, this was a thing. Show it. Oh, my God.

[Alana Glaser]

Oh, my God.

[Grace O'Malley]

Absolutely.

[Alana Glaser]

It's McDonald scholars. Get.

[Grace O'Malley]

Get the memo. See ya.

[Alana Glaser]

See you at the improv show.

Wear your most colorful jeans. It's improv time.

[Grace O'Malley]

Are you guys all still pals?

[Alana Glaser]

Oh, yeah. Yeah. Okay. Hell, yeah. Let me see. Let me see. You know, I haven't seen Arturo in a while, but I love him. He is so delightful and delicious and funny, and I love him. And his face is shaped like a heart. And Gether I haven't seen in a long time. And he moved to Jersey, but he's. He's.

[Grace O'Malley]

That.

[Alana Glaser]

He's doing comedy, but I just haven't seen him.

[Grace O'Malley]

He's not friends with your gymnastics pal?

[Alana Glaser]

He is not friends with my gymnastics pal, but I'm from Long island, so he wouldn't be.

[Grace O'Malley]

Oh, yes, Abby. Wait, where did you just say?

[Alana Glaser]

Long Island.

[Grace O'Malley]

Oh, and. And where did he move to?

[Alana Glaser]

Jersey.

[Grace O'Malley]

Oh, I'm sorry.

[Alana Glaser]

Which I equated earlier. That's why you're doing it.

[Grace O'Malley]

I knew I knew Long Island. I knew this. Yes. I messed up.

[Alana Glaser]

We said this earlier. You didn't mess up.

[Grace O'Malley]

I messed up a little bit.

[Alana Glaser]

And then Paula W. Downs and Abby I talked to all the time. Yeah.

[Grace O'Malley]

Hell, yeah. Oh, boy.

[Alana Glaser]

Okay, here's the head shot.

[Grace O'Malley]

It's alluring.

[Alana Glaser]

My. You know, I still have a human face, which I'm proud of, so I don't look totally different. Yeah. Yeah. So it's good.

[Grace O'Malley]

It's great.

[Alana Glaser]

Things are good.

[Grace O'Malley]

And just to wrap things up.

[Alana Glaser]

Oh, my God, this is the dirtiest.

[Grace O'Malley]

Thing you have online.

[Alana Glaser]

Yeah. So in my sophomore standup special, Human Magic, I tell a story about renting.

[Grace O'Malley]

An Airbnb, by the way.

[Alana Glaser]

Thank you so much. I rented an Airbnb in Florida. And, like, all Florida Airbnbs are susceptible to possibly having porn filmed in them. And mine. Mine was a pornhouse. And I so, like, it had, like, ugly art and ugly decor that I was, like, shoving into the garage for the three or four weeks we were renting a house down there. And we take the frame off the wall, and there's this sticker, like, porn film all over this house. This is, like, the first time I traveled with my baby. And gross.

[Grace O'Malley]

I was, like, so worried, like, is your. Is your baby girl? Like, you're just so stressed out about germs and all this stuff. Pornhouse. I just. It's. It.

[Alana Glaser]

I'm so pro porn. We, like, started this conversation talking about porn and, like, enjoying porn. And I'm certainly pro, you know? Like, I love that only fans, like, people, like, make their money, like, real artists, profiting right into the pocket. Love it.

[Grace O'Malley]

That's great, right?

[Alana Glaser]

Woman made porn. I love. I also talk about in my. In my hour, but that was so gross and upsetting. Yeah, so gross.

[Grace O'Malley]

It's just, you know, circumstantially gross. Just to wrap things up, we have some voicemails.

[Alana Glaser]

Let's do it.

[Grace O'Malley]

Like, I know you've worked in the. The service industry.

[Alana Glaser]

Waiter. Oh, God, yeah.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah. You've had, like, a thousand. A thousand jobs.

[Alana Glaser]

Literally, from age 11 to 24, I was busing tables and waiters.

[Grace O'Malley]

Big ditto. So I put up a question for everyone to ask is, what's the worst thing that's ever happened to you at work?

[Alana Glaser]

A few things are coming up. Once I was. I worked as a caterer at the golf club in my town. And this was actually a positive. It was, like, one of the worst things I've ever done. But it was a positive thing, which was I spilled a man's.

Beer, a full.

Beer, like, down his back.

[Grace O'Malley]

Oh, like.

[Alana Glaser]

Like down here. Like, on purpose?

[Grace O'Malley]

No, I thought it was being a real trick.

[Alana Glaser]

Good girl. And it. But, like, the thing spilled, and it was, like, down the back, and it was. I was, like, young and cute enough that it was. He just. He was like, I was wearing my suit jacket. Don't worry about it. He took it off, and he was like, no worries. And I was like. Like, I was like, the other ones.

[Grace O'Malley]

You try not to break those.

[Alana Glaser]

Like, I just. I am like. I don't know. It was so scary. Nisqua Golf Club. Another horrible thing that that place was. Oh, my gosh. Wow. Another thing that was like, are you.

[Grace O'Malley]

In high school working there?

[Alana Glaser]

I was in college.

[Grace O'Malley]

College.

[Alana Glaser]

And I worked there with my brother too, one summer. And then one summer solo, and he. I smelled something so rank, and I was like, something has died on the premises. Something has died. And for days I told them, like, something has died.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah.

[Alana Glaser]

And finally they looked behind the. Some refrigerator and a rat had died back there. But it was like, can you just listen to me? I'm working here. I can tell you about the conditions, which are fucking vile.

[Grace O'Malley]

I've been here summer after summer. It doesn't usually smell like stinky rats. That.

[Alana Glaser]

And it did. And then they certainly removed it once they discovered it. But it was like, how many days do I have to tell you something stinks. Come smell with me.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah, come on.

[Alana Glaser]

Come on.

[Grace O'Malley]

Take them. Take a waft.

[Alana Glaser]

Oh, my Lord.

[Grace O'Malley]

Let's walk over here and waft it up.

[Alana Glaser]

Oh, my gosh.

I also worked at a place called Steamers Landing.

[Grace O'Malley]

Steamers Landing.

[Alana Glaser]

I think it's closed, but in Broad City. Paul W. Downson Litri Aniello, two of the three creators of Hacks with Jen Statsky, who also wrote In Broad City. They wrote a script, the RuPaul script, actually. And I'm referring to the places I've. I've worked at. And they renamed Steamer's Landing Dumpers Post.

[Grace O'Malley]

Oh, that's so good.

[Alana Glaser]

And Abby and I. Abby and I would always. Every season we'd be left with 10 scripts that we'd have to rewrite them all to fit production budgets and cut for the fucking. And producers, whatever. And I read this script before Abby did, and I. I was reading it and I read Dumper's Post and I fell to my knees and I was like, just laying on a couch on my knees on the floor, just like shaking, like, dying at dumper's pose. So shout out to that. Which still cracks me the fuck up. But at Steamer's Landing, there were. On off the stop was Rector Street. It's like Steamers rectum.

Couldn'T be. Could gross or anal.

[Grace O'Malley]

Anal, anal.

[Alana Glaser]

And.

And this guy once, my brother was visiting me and I was like, oh, my gosh, thank God. And there were like, regular, like severe alcoholics who would be there like every morning for alcohol, like true vodka to go about their day. It was so, so sad. And I. I didn't really witness alcoholism in my family, so it was like. Like a super, Like a darkness of its own. Yeah, I'm lucky that I came to it at like 24 and not 4 or 14. But my brother was visiting me and one of these drunk guys who was, like, kind of like a. I don't know. He had some, like, eerily childish name. Scooter or Scout. An old man.

[Grace O'Malley]

I love that.

[Alana Glaser]

Who was, like, asking us if we were incestuous.

[Grace O'Malley]

Oh, wow. Top of the morning to you, pal.

[Alana Glaser]

And Elliot and I were like, is what we think is happening happening? You're crazy.

[Grace O'Malley]

You're out of your goddamn mind. Have another White Russian.

[Alana Glaser]

Yeah, just. Just young women getting abused, man. Just young women getting abused, trying to make a fucking dollar.

[Grace O'Malley]

It's not.

[Alana Glaser]

Yeah, it's rough out there.

[Grace O'Malley]

And you just eat it.

[Alana Glaser]

Yep.

[Grace O'Malley]

Oh, yeah.

[Alana Glaser]

Just like, eat it, scooter. Are you 65? What's your government name? Go by that and, like, go do what you got to do. If I was 24, Elliot was 28. Like, we were young. Some people. That's so crazy just to get drunk enough to be so. To. To be abusive, I guess it's like.

[Grace O'Malley]

Oh, yeah, you know, they're starting at the top of the day. They're waiting for you to open up with the keys. It's all that jazz. It's. It gets to be a lot. What about you? I'd say I worked at an ice cream shop. I loved that job. I ran it like the military. It was amazing.

[Alana Glaser]

How old were you?

[Grace O'Malley]

From 15 to 21.

[Alana Glaser]

Incredible, I think. Incredible.

[Grace O'Malley]

And I always had, like. Like, I had, like, three jobs at one point in high school. Like, I just, like, I love to work.

[Alana Glaser]

Like, I wonder if it's a comedian thing, because I was like, I'm gonna make my money. It's like, hustle. It's like. And also, you're like, I'm literally preparing to go do my comedy career.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah.

[Alana Glaser]

So I'm gonna need a savings.

[Grace O'Malley]

I'm banking this up.

[Alana Glaser]

Yeah, yeah, yeah, dude, I'd love to hear it.

[Grace O'Malley]

I moved to New York on ice cream money, which I think is very funny.

[Alana Glaser]

Waitering and babysitting. Yeah, yeah.

[Grace O'Malley]

And so.

[Alana Glaser]

Fuck, yeah. Grace.

[Grace O'Malley]

We had. Right before I moved to New York, I worked Covid summer. Wow. And we wore masks, and we took it very serious. And.

[Alana Glaser]

Oh, my God. 27. You are.

[Grace O'Malley]

I'm 27. Yes.

[Alana Glaser]

Now. Wow. This is like. You just is so recent.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah. No, it's nuts. So go on.

[Alana Glaser]

I'm in awe.

[Grace O'Malley]

And some guy pulls up playing Trump's inauguration speech, like, on full volume in his pickup truck, and he comes up, and I go, oh, sir, you have to wear a mask at the window. I'm Like, I know where this is going. And I go.

[Alana Glaser]

He goes, it's literally Covid.

[Grace O'Malley]

And so he puts it on, like, reluctantly.

[Alana Glaser]

He's acting. Little baby doesn't want to put his mask on because he doesn't want to.

[Grace O'Malley]

Like this, like, it's like, oh, my God.

[Alana Glaser]

Oh, my God.

[Grace O'Malley]

And so I make him an ice cream cone and he goes, you know what? This is what I think about the mask thing, you liberal fuck. Put his ice cream right through the mask. Put his ice cream right through the mask. Put his ice cream right through the mask. I was like, you are a silly goose. What a silly goose. You just wasted your ice cream.

[Alana Glaser]

You wasted your money. That's frightening.

[Grace O'Malley]

But I was just like, I just shut the window.

And locked.

[Alana Glaser]

That was so bizarre. Psychotic, so crazy. Oh, my God. Little baby. And you're 21 years old, you sweet little baby.

[Grace O'Malley]

Oh, but I was a. I. I've always been like an older 21. I was like, you're a silly goose. Like, I just kind of walked away.

[Alana Glaser]

So crazy.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah.

[Alana Glaser]

Also, it's just so interesting, all the things, like, I scream through them. It's like, poetic, you know what I mean? I scream through the mask and it's also like phallic, you know, I mean, shoving it in his mouth. I know.

[Grace O'Malley]

If you see the irony here, you goofball. Yeah, it's just.

[Alana Glaser]

What a silly goose.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah. And so we have some people's voicemails, if. If you don't mind. And we're just going to run through those real quick and we'll call it. Call it a day.

[Alana Glaser]

My boss was from Europe and he went to kissing me hello on the cheek like Europeans do, and I didn't.

[Grace O'Malley]

Know how to react, so I gave.

[Alana Glaser]

Him my forehead to kiss.

[Grace O'Malley]

This.

[Alana Glaser]

I've never been so embarrassed in my life.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah, that's. That's really. That's a tough one. That's a tough one. Cuz it's a cultural thing.

[Alana Glaser]

I mean, it's weird. I. I don't. I don't even care if you're European. Like, bosses do not kiss people on the cheek. Also, as I get older, like, cheek kisses are fully intimate. They're an inch from the lip.

[Grace O'Malley]

I would kill for a cheek kiss.

Maybe not from a boss, but I.

[Alana Glaser]

Will fully kiss your cheek before we go. Oh, yes, that would be such a good way to end this. So first of all, like, you're not in the wrong for not knowing what to do. A boss is not supposed to. I don't care if you're the most Parisian bitch you've ever seen. You're not supposed to. And also, like, when Europeans kiss on the cheek, they do the double kiss. And you go to the side of the cheek. It's representative.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah.

[Alana Glaser]

No lips to anything.

[Grace O'Malley]

You don't get. You don't get to. Yeah. You don't get to French your way out of this. And I think it's so sweet. She. She's like, well, I. I offered him the forehead.

[Alana Glaser]

I love it.

[Grace O'Malley]

I love it.

[Alana Glaser]

It. And get further from the lips. And also, it's like, yeah. You are more like a grandpa to me.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah. Right here, buddy.

[Alana Glaser]

Yeah.

[Grace O'Malley]

Right where it shines.

What we got next?

[Alana Glaser]

Hey, Grace. Just wanted to say I love you and your show. You are a gorgeous, funny queen.

[Grace O'Malley]

Oh, my God. That's really kind. I didn't tell them you were coming.

[Alana Glaser]

About a month ago, we were doing a public speaking workshop off site, and I decided to wear my mom's vintage. Vintage velvet pencil skirt. Shout out to my way too tiny mama. Also note, I was wearing a song because who wants panty lines in a pencil skirt? 100 especially velvet. The second I got to this event, it ripped up the back vertically from the bottom. I could still pass it off as part of the fit, so I decided to just go with it. The workshop required a lot of jumping up and speaking, and every time I stood, the skirt ripped a little bit more. Oh. Halfway through the day, the rip was basically at the bottom of my butt. I couldn't leave because I didn't have my car. And so I started to just keep my back to every wall. But now imagine I had to strategically stand and back up to the podium every time. It was my. I love this. Finally made it through the day. And as a final hurrah, my skirt made its final tear and I had to cover my bare ass with my. With my purse as I shook hands with my co workers and boss. I love her. Catch an Uber home. I love her. It was heinous.

[Grace O'Malley]

She's incredible.

[Alana Glaser]

Incredible.

[Grace O'Malley]

That's so crazy.

[Alana Glaser]

Incredible.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah. I picture her like, like trying to make it fun. Like a backing up into the podium, like, hey, guys, how we doing?

[Alana Glaser]

Hilarious. Hilarious. That is so. I'm delighted by that story. And also just women are so funny. And the boxes were put in and then us trying to, like, celebrate those boxes, you know, it's just like, what a fucking tangle. That is so funny. I love her also, the levity with which she's telling the story is just inspiring.

[Grace O'Malley]

Fantastic. We gotta track her down.

[Alana Glaser]

Love Both those women.

[Grace O'Malley]

Great work. I was a teacher and worked in a school and got punched in the face by a 12 year old boy. He was like just as tall as I was, so it like low key hurt and my nose ring popped out. Yeah. And then he like choked a girl. I was kind of nuts. But then one time I was driving to the same job and on the way to work, I know this wasn't at work, but on the way to work I popped a tire. Classic. Someone comes out, fixes the tire. I'm driving back to work, you know, because I never made it the first time because of the tire. I make it to work, pop a tire, another tire. Driving in to the lot that. Yeah. A, a tow truck had to come at that point.

Yeah, that was a bad day of work. Maybe not as bad as when I got punched in the face, but yeah. Sorry for your troubles.

[Alana Glaser]

What's the context for these voice?

[Grace O'Malley]

Oh, the question was, what's the worst thing that's ever happened to you at work?

[Alana Glaser]

Oh, oh, right, right. Oh gosh. I'm like remembering now when like boys were violent in, in sixth or seventh grade and it was like, this is, first of all, something wrong is happening at home and this is really sad. But also how scary it was and how they like really took over the government.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah.

[Alana Glaser]

Is like so upsetting. But not, I don't think forever. I really don't.

[Grace O'Malley]

I know, I don't think so either.

[Alana Glaser]

But it's just, it's so sad because also like if a 12 year old punched me, I'd be like, you, dude, dude.

[Grace O'Malley]

It would take a lot of restraint.

[Alana Glaser]

But then to think about like, go, what?

[Grace O'Malley]

Sorry, I've thrown a pillow at a baby.

[Alana Glaser]

Say more.

[Grace O'Malley]

Baby. Baby called me fat.

[Alana Glaser]

What?

[Grace O'Malley]

Baby got a pillow, knocked it down.

[Alana Glaser]

A baby called you fat? What do you mean?

[Grace O'Malley]

Baby called me fat? Literally, the word, like, he's like, you are fat. I had a pillow in my head and I just threw it at him.

[Alana Glaser]

Okay. So if they.

[Grace O'Malley]

I didn't have, I wasn't thinking.

[Alana Glaser]

How old were you?

[Grace O'Malley]

Like 17?

[Alana Glaser]

Yeah, that's totally fine.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah.

[Alana Glaser]

Also they weren't a baby if they could speak. Yeah, you literally can't.

[Grace O'Malley]

Like, it's not a baby, It's a little shit.

[Alana Glaser]

Was it like a three year old?

[Grace O'Malley]

It was like they were like six, seven.

[Alana Glaser]

That's not a baby. That's a little shit.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah, it's a little shit.

[Alana Glaser]

Yeah, that's fine.

[Grace O'Malley]

Okay, cool. I just remembered that it just came right to the front of the brain.

[Alana Glaser]

Yeah. No, that's a little shithead. Yeah, it's just like.

[Grace O'Malley]

No, that's shathid.

[Alana Glaser]

And you were a child. You're so self.

[Grace O'Malley]

But, yeah, I wasn't even 18, so.

All right, cool. What's next? Glad I got that off my chest. Hi, Grace. Hey.

[Alana Glaser]

So I don't know if this counts as at work, but it had to do with my job. And it's probably one of the worst things that's happened to me in my life. And I was up.

Sleeping with my manager, and I was in his bed and he had went to work and I was gonna leave, you know, when I, like, woke up because it was early in the morning when he went to work and I'm naked in his bed, just doing my thing. Well, sleeping. And all of a sudden.

[Grace O'Malley]

Wife, two.

[Alana Glaser]

Two girls bust open the door where I'm sleeping practically naked. And I guess it was his wife and his daughter who I did not know about. And they jumped me, they stole my phone, they pulled a knife on me, all this. Thank God his roommate was home, because if he wasn't there, I would have been like, I don't know what, actually. And so thank God I had the day off. That's all. And then she went to my job and told all my co workers. Oh, she called my mom for my phone. I told her that I was sleeping with her husband. By the way, this man is 20 years older than me, so, yeah, that's all. I still work there, actually, so I.

[Grace O'Malley]

Guess it's not the worst thing. Love you.

[Alana Glaser]

Bye.

[Grace O'Malley]

I love you too. Everything okay? Call me, text me. Everything okay.

[Alana Glaser]

She didn't know they existed. This guy lied to her. Yeah.

[Grace O'Malley]

It's the guy's fault. And I don't know why we're doing women on women crime him, but.

[Alana Glaser]

But also if he. Well, yeah, that sucks about the wife and daughter.

[Grace O'Malley]

I'd like to see them getting along.

[Alana Glaser]

The wife and daughter. Yeah. But if he has a roommate, he's not living with the wife and daughter, right? Yeah, they're like, split up. And he's like taking advantage of a woman 20 years younger than him. But also she's getting her. She's like, I'm lying there naked, doing my thing.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah, she has the day off.

[Alana Glaser]

She's day off.

[Grace O'Malley]

She probably. Probably negotiated that 100. Yeah.

[Alana Glaser]

And well, yeah, you know, I don't know. She wouldn't have sex. Yeah, that sucks.

[Grace O'Malley]

That sucks bad. A knife in the situation is crazy. Imagine being naked, then knife.

[Alana Glaser]

No, no, no. God, how powerless I would feel.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah. I Was just. I just pictured myself hitting the knife out with my boobs.

[Alana Glaser]

That is so scary. I love that she still works there.

[Grace O'Malley]

I love that she still works there too. That's. I mean, it must be a great job. Benefits.

[Alana Glaser]

She. I. I don't know. She sounds pretty secure.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah, she's got it going on.

[Alana Glaser]

Just have sex. Knows that she deserves to have good sex and also knows that she's not like at fault here.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah.

And she's. She's got a good story.

[Alana Glaser]

It's so good.

[Grace O'Malley]

It's always good for a story, you know? So good.

[Alana Glaser]

I bet she has more. Okay. Do you want to kiss on the cheese cheek?

[Grace O'Malley]

I would love a kiss on the ch.

[Alana Glaser]

We'll end it.

[Grace O'Malley]

Oh, my God. This is amazing. Can I come over there?

[Alana Glaser]

Oh, please.

[Grace O'Malley]

Amazing.

[Alana Glaser]

Look at me all giddy now. My kid's 4, so cheek kisses are like the thing. Oh my God. You're amazing.

Love you. Love you. Love you. That was so.

[Grace O'Malley]

Oh my God.

[Alana Glaser]

Thank you so much.

[Grace O'Malley]

Dude.

[Alana Glaser]

That was so fun.

[Grace O'Malley]

That was so much fun. I really appreciate it. Oh my God.

[Alana Glaser]

That was so fun.

[Grace O'Malley]

You doing this is like so huge. Thank you.

[Alana Glaser]

Oh, I love it.

[Grace O'Malley]

I love it. Thank you. I love it.

[Alana Glaser]

Can't wait to have you on my.

[Grace O'Malley]

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[Alana Glaser]

All seem the same on the surface, but having insurance isn't the same as having State Farm. It's like getting a granola bar with a candle in it. When you wanted a three layer birthday cake, you wouldn't settle for just any dessert on your birthday. So don't settle for just any insurance. When it comes to getting the help you need, State Farm is the real deal. Like a good neighbor, State Farm is there.