A 93-Year-Old Shares Secrets to a Creative Life

Summary

Don’t Listen To Us — “A 93-Year-Old Shares Secrets to a Creative Life”

Podcast: Don’t Listen To Us (Lemonada Media)
Hosts: Mandy Patinkin, Kathryn Grody, Gideon Grody Patinkin
Guest: Doris Peltzman
Release Date: April 22, 2026

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Episode Overview

This heartwarming and deeply human episode centers on creativity, resilience, and connection across generations. The Patinkin-Grody family welcomes Doris Peltzman—a vibrant, wise, and witty 93-year-old artist and former school principal—to share her insights into creative longevity, the beauty (and frustrations) of aging, and the art of embracing adventure at any stage of life. Through listener questions and candid family banter, the episode delivers practical wisdom, memorable stories, and a healthy dose of laughter.

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Key Segments & Discussion Highlights

1. Parental Guidance and Raising Hopeful Kids (02:40–14:35)

• Listener Letter: Shaida, a parent, asks for advice on nurturing hope and faith in children amid a world full of daunting news and misinformation.
• Kathryn’s Approach:
  • Emphasizes nourishment—not just with food, but with "healthy" information and beauty.
  • Advocates for honestly acknowledging hardships while actively seeking and sharing stories of helpers and positive news.
  • Quote: "How do we protect our kids and ourselves from not drowning our minds and our spirits and our souls in the junk misinformation age?" (04:31, Kathryn)
• Mandy’s Advice:
  • Encourages limiting news exposure, prioritizing time outdoors, and delighting in children and grandchildren for reminders of wonder.
  • Quote: “Spend more time outdoors in nature, take walks, go see friends... [kids] teach you everything instantly about the joy of wonder and discovery.” (07:05, Mandy)
• On Activism & Experience:
  • Kathryn and Gideon recall participating in marches and community actions, stressing the joy and togetherness these bring.
  • Kathryn introduces tikkun olam—the Jewish concept of repairing the world.
  • Quote: "Being good and kind and thoughtful and aware kids was really important to me... I took you both to every demonstration I could." (07:40, Kathryn)
• Moving Beyond the Digital:
  • Gideon advocates for real-world action versus 'clicktivism': volunteering, connecting with others, and community service.
  • Quote: "Getting out... and finding a place in your community... physically where you are interacting with other people, I think is kind of a big part of our chance and hope to get out of these digital silos." (09:22, Gideon)

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2. Context, History, and Perspective (11:14–13:04)

• Kathryn and Gideon discuss their childhood fears (e.g., the Cuban Missile Crisis), emphasizing the power of historical perspective.
• Kathryn encourages teaching history to contextualize difficult times, referencing her own ongoing learning and the historian Heather Cox Richardson.
• Quote: "It helps me to know that in 1865 this horrible thing happened... to get a perspective." (12:20, Kathryn)

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3. Introducing Doris Peltzman: Embracing the Unexpected (16:17–22:15)

• Doris’s Story:
  • Doris, about to turn 93, reconnected with creativity after a career in education.
  • She describes her serendipitous friendship with Gideon, highlighting the thrill of being open to life’s surprises.
• Key Concept — Bashert:
  • Yiddish for "meant to be" — the sense that some encounters are fated.
  • Quote: “You reminded me very much of one of my grandsons... it's meet, greet, repeat.” (19:19, Doris)
• Embracing Adventure:
  • Doris urges people at any age to “be open to the unexpected.”
  • Quote: "When someone comes knocking at your door, you have to open it. You have to go there, because if you don't, you might miss a fantastic adventure." (21:35, Doris)

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4. Secrets to Sustaining a Creative Life (22:15–27:55)

• Listener Question (Luke): How do you protect your creative spark as life gets busier and as you get older?
• Doris’s Reflections:
  • When younger: Creativity was hard to sustain, “like I had jumped on a train... there were no stops... you hop on that train... you disappear... and then you know it, you're a mother.”
  • Now: She carves time for joy and creativity, seeing it as essential, not selfish.
  • Quote: “If I’m not happy, I can’t make my family happy. So call it selfish, call it ego... I try to do or be in a place that brings me joy.” (24:13, Doris)
  • Aging makes creative vision “broader”—more ‘peripheral vision’ and openness.
• Mandy’s Perspective:
  • Views creativity as inseparable from being alive (“I never think of it as creativity... it’s being alive.” [26:20])
  • Finds miracles and creativity in daily life, not just in art.
  • Urges himself to “celebrate what we’ve done” rather than worry about missing out.
  • Quote: “We waste so much of that privilege by worrying that we've wasted it as opposed to celebrating what we've done.” (27:25, Mandy)
• Kathryn’s Take:
  • Warns against comparing oneself to earlier achievements—it can stifle creativity.
  • Finds new authenticity in creative work now: “I don't have to hide behind other characters... I'm just me naked here. I am, you know, as naked as I'm going to be soulfully out there.” (28:15)
  • Creativity, for her, now means being truly oneself.

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5. Aging: Perceptions, Annoyances, and Joys (29:10–32:32)

• What Irritates Doris:
  • People assuming frailty, absence of intellect, or dismissing her due to age.
  • Quote: "They assume that I'm not cognizant, or they assume that I'm weak and frail because I am small, or... that I have not a clue of what they're speaking to me about. Those things truly upset me." (29:50, Doris)
• What Doris Loves:
  • Spontaneous kindness and connection—young people offering help on the street, helping with groceries and flowers.
  • The emotional resonance of simple civility and mutual aid.
  • Quote: “I love to paint [flowers], I love to look at them. I love to smell them. I have to have them just like music. I have to—it has to be part of my soul, part of my everyday life.” (31:38, Doris)

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6. On Community & Connecting Across Differences (32:32–34:05)

• Gideon’s Story:
  • Helps strangers in distress and reflects on the risks and fears different cultures face (e.g., undocumented friends afraid to call the ambulance).
  • Reinforces the value and necessity of helping each other, despite obstacles.
• Kathryn’s Reflection:
  • Celebrates civil, serendipitous interactions with strangers as core to community resilience.
  • Quote: “Practice being that part of being in a community... just stranger-related, you know?” (34:05)

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7. Life Advice, or Rather — Recommendations (34:05–35:59)

• Doris Rejects ‘Advice’, Offers ‘Recommendations’:
  • “I don't give advice. I give recommendations.” (34:30, Doris)—her mantra, warmly repeated throughout the episode.
• Her Recommendation:
  • "Just keep growing. Maybe that’s it. Just don’t stop. Just get off that train, whatever train you’re on… take the train, but get off at different stations." (34:50, Doris & 35:16, with Kathryn)
  • Be open to new experiences, connections, and self-renewal at any age.
• Emotional Closing:
  • Doris: “Connecting with the both of you and with Gideon – Gideon, you especially have touched my heart.” (35:20)
  • The family reciprocates with warmth and humor.

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8. Memorable Banter & “Would You Rather” Game (36:32–39:12)

• Rapid-Fire “Would You Rather”:
  • The family (with Doris) debates absurd scenarios (e.g., chocolate feet vs. peanut butter ears).
  • Demonstrates their trademark quirky, loving dynamic.
  • Notable laugh: Mandy, deadpan, on chocolate feet: “I would suck Mom’s toes to my heart’s desire, as long as they were dark chocolate toes.” (37:39)
• Shared Agreements:
  • Ugly house/beautiful view beats beautiful house/ugly view.
  • Both prefer to be ‘sneezy’ over ‘itchy.’
  • Preference for three eyes over two noses for “more perspective.”

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Notable Quotes & Moments with Timestamps

• “Children will listen, so be aware of what you talk about and don’t talk about around your kids... try to find good things to offset the horrors on a daily basis.” (05:40, Kathryn Grody)
• “Our existence has the possibility and potential of being miraculous. We're here for just a moment, and it is an amazing privilege.” (27:15, Mandy Patinkin)
• "When someone comes knocking at your door, you have to open it... if you don't, you might miss a fantastic adventure." (21:35, Doris Peltzman)
• “If I’m not happy, I can’t make my family happy...” (24:13, Doris Peltzman)
• “I don't give advice. I give recommendations.” (34:30, Doris Peltzman)
• “Just keep growing... get off at different stations.” (34:50–35:16, Doris & Kathryn)

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Tone & Style

Warm, witty, and unscripted. The hosts and Doris blend Jewish wisdom, humor, and vulnerability—alternately philosophical, practical, and laugh-out-loud irreverent.

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Recurring Episode Themes

• Creativity is a lifelong, evolving process—even when life “interrupts.”
• Growth and openness aren’t limited by age; adventure and reinvention can come at any time.
• Resilience comes from community, historical perspective, and finding beauty—every single day.

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For Listeners: Takeaways

Whether you’re raising children in an anxious era, hoping to protect your creative energy through busy or aging years, or just seeking connection and kindness, this episode brims with wisdom, humor, and practical magic.

As Doris would say: “Just keep growing. Get off at different stations. And always open the door.”

Transcript

[Mandy Patinkin]

Lemonade.

[Gideon Grody Patinkin]

On this episode of Don't Listen to us, our 93 year old friend shares the secret to a creative life. It's pretty special to get to be in your 90s. Not everybody gets to do that. I'm curious, what's a piece of life advice that you'd give to someone out there listening who's in their 20s, 30s, or 70s?

[Kathryn Grody]

Or 70s advice?

[Gideon Grody Patinkin]

I'm curious. Yeah. From your vantage point?

[Doris Peltzman]

Well, I tell my sons and my family I don't give advice. I give recommendations.

[Gideon Grody Patinkin]

That's great. Well done.

[Doris Peltzman]

I love that.

[Gideon Grody Patinkin]

What would be your recommendation? Do you know where Mandy went?

[Kathryn Grody]

Can you please get him back? Because I never longed for him so much.

[Mandy Patinkin]

He's inside my mouth.

[Kathryn Grody]

I miss him. Bring him back.

[Mandy Patinkin]

I can see if he can say hi. Would I even say hi?

[Gideon Grody Patinkin]

It's kind of terrifying. It's kind of fascinating.

[Kathryn Grody]

Would you like to.

[Mandy Patinkin]

Would you like to say hi?

[Kathryn Grody]

No, I just want you to go back. Please.

[Mandy Patinkin]

As soon as you're out there, come and say hi.

[Gideon Grody Patinkin]

He's emerging. There's some sort of transformation happening. They seem to be in limbo. Mandy. Mandy is stuck inside. Strange. Mandy. He's trapped.

[Kathryn Grody]

Oh, please.

[Gideon Grody Patinkin]

Catherine is about to quit the podcast.

[Kathryn Grody]

I am. This is it. I can't.

[Mandy Patinkin]

Oh, here I am.

[Gideon Grody Patinkin]

Wow. Wow.

[Mandy Patinkin]

What happened really was hard.

[Gideon Grody Patinkin]

What happened?

[Mandy Patinkin]

I don't know. First this guy comes by.

[Gideon Grody Patinkin]

Yeah.

[Sponsor/Announcer]

And he wants to sit down.

[Mandy Patinkin]

What are you doing? I said we're busy. Then he swallows me.

[Gideon Grody Patinkin]

Wow.

[Mandy Patinkin]

Then he starts, like, just annoying me. I was itching.

[Gideon Grody Patinkin]

Have you had a reaction? Swallowed by a whole person?

[Mandy Patinkin]

I have never. I can't talk about that.

[Gideon Grody Patinkin]

And what was it like inside that? Strange.

[Mandy Patinkin]

It was. It wasn't like the whale story.

[Gideon Grody Patinkin]

Yeah.

[Mandy Patinkin]

It wasn't like gooey. And, you know, I didn't like, see other creatures.

[Gideon Grody Patinkin]

Sure.

[Mandy Patinkin]

But I did have an allergic reaction.

[Gideon Grody Patinkin]

Well, I'm so glad you're back. We're going to our first listener question today. Our first question is from Shada. No headphones. S H E Y D A and mom, if you could read Shaida's email for us.

[Kathryn Grody]

Hi, Mandy, Catherine and Gideon. I adore you all and find so much nourishment in your posts. And now the podcast. I literally listen to it while I cook for my family. So they're getting nourishment too. That's such a nice word. Speaking of my family, here's my question. As parents, you seem to have found a way to, in the poet Maggie Smith's words, teach your children that this place could be beautiful. I love Maggie Smith, even though it looks like a real shithole. I think about that poem so often these days as my 11 year old is becoming more aware of the world around her. Hearing about all the awfulness happening, hearing, yes, about the perfidious president's every stupid move, I think about how to keep her in love with humanity. I point to the helpers, as Mr. Rogers told us to. But the kid is smart and aware and she's living in America in 2025. For every helper, she also sees someone trying to imprison a helper or mock a helper. You get the point. How so? How do you raise kids with hope and faith in the future while also remaining truthful about the challenges we face? How do you manage your own feelings of despair? Because as we know, children will listen to our words. They will listen to our rage. How did you find that balance with your own kids? And how do you imagine you might approach that challenge now that every kid has access to constant information and misinformation overload? Thanks for all your goodness and your honesty, Shaida. Well, Shaida, as you can see, I'm very moved by your beautiful letter and your observations. And I love the word you use, nourishment. How do we. We talk so much about nourishing, sort of practically with healthy food and not junk food. And how do we protect our kids and ourselves from not drowning our minds and our spirits and our souls in the junk misinformation age, you know, and

[Gideon Grody Patinkin]

the real fear of what happened.

[Doris Peltzman]

And the real fear.

[Kathryn Grody]

Right. The real fear of what's happening. I'm obsessed with this and I feel so lucky. I had it easier than you did, Shana, that's for sure. I raised my kids when the worst thing was just TV and bad video games. But even then I really thought I wouldn't let Gideon watch more Moral Combat because I thought it was a World War three preparatory game and all the other parents thought I was nuts. He probably snuck it anyway, but I was glad he knew that I thought he was viewing something that desensitized him. I think what you do is, first of all, it's your behavior. Children will listen, so be aware of what you talk about and don't talk about around your kids. An 11 year old is pretty sophisticated at this point. I try and find good things to offset the horrors on a daily basis. I look at Jessica Cravens who points out and gives me a list of all the wins in court, of all the people fighting back, of all the people Helping their neighbors of all the wins electorally. So on that platform, I try and get good news and I try and I try to see beauty the day, enjoying the day, and take a really big historical view. I'm watching the American Revolution right now, learning lots of things. This particular moment is really hard, but we've lived through other moments as a country and as people. I've been through hard times personally, and they have passed and things have gotten better. So that's all, I think you monitor what your kid is listening. You point out the good stuff and help her deal with a perspective of the bad. That's. That's sort of what I can think of right now.

[Mandy Patinkin]

I love that Kevin Costner movie. I just remember the line, if you build it, they will come. And so I would avoid looking at the news on your phone or on your television or listening to it. Certainly you'll scan it or you'll. What's it called when you flick through it?

[Kathryn Grody]

Scroll.

[Mandy Patinkin]

Scroll it. And you'll see something that you need to read. So read it. But spend more time outdoors in nature, take walks, go see friends. If you have grandchildren, be with them. They teach you everything instantly about the joy of wonder and discovery.

[Gideon Grody Patinkin]

Did you guys ever feel like you had to protect your kids from the darkness of the world? Or were you pretty open about what we were getting exposed to as kids or with politics or like, did you have a strategy or different feelings about approaching that as parents or.

[Kathryn Grody]

Yeah, I mean, I really wanted you to be aware of the whole concept of tikin olam giving back, repairing the world. Takin olam giving back, repairing the world. Being good and kind and thoughtful and aware kids was really important to me. So whenever I saw you behaving that way, I was always very big on affirming it, telling you how proud I was of you. And I took you both to every demonstration I could. I took you to the Million Moms March. You know, I. I showed you. I thought that by dad and I that we were involved in trying to make the world a better place without scaring you about it.

[Gideon Grody Patinkin]

Yeah, I. I mean, I have memories of being involved with that stuff or going to events with organizations fighting gun violence or going to marches against war. And it feeling not scary to engage in those ways because often those are. They can be intense environments, but also joyful. It's people uniting and gathering in a shared cause to, you know, make the world a better place. I mean, something that comes up to me that I wish we'd done more of growing up and That I think we could still do more of as a family and with grandkids. And everything is like. So many of these conversations are happening in the digital space, happening on your podcast, on your social media, the news you're reading. I think getting out of reading and hearing and clicking about stuff and finding a place in your community where you are volunteering for an immigrant rights group, you are volunteering for a soup kitchen, a food pantry. You're doing something physically where you're interacting with other people, I think is kind of a big part of our chance and hope to get out of these digital silos. And I think it can be easy to feel like you are participating and fighting back and contributing just digitally.

[Kathryn Grody]

I think that is so important. And we're out of practice doing that because it's so easy to feel you have a digital relationship by supporting or talking or sharing. It's a very different thing in person. And I feel. Speaking for myself, and I'm a pretty social in person person.

[Mandy Patinkin]

Yeah.

[Kathryn Grody]

And I'm at a practice.

[Gideon Grody Patinkin]

And I'm not saying you guys don't, you know, you. You know, I feel you guys have been incredibly generous and have imbued that spirit in your family and have committed tons of hours and efforts and concerts and raised millions of dollars for organizations. I'm just talking about as. As a family, the difference in talking about things and seeing them on the computer versus getting out into the world. But one other. Be with these people.

[Mandy Patinkin]

Touch their hands. Yeah.

[Kathryn Grody]

Just find various friends. It's all kinds of people.

[Mandy Patinkin]

It's like people like doctors, they don't even touch you when they examine you anymore. And then you go to a doctor that touches you, and you're like, oh, my God, that was incredible. Put his hands on my kid. Put his hands on me. Felt me. And you're in shock. That's how it used to be. Touch people.

[Gideon Grody Patinkin]

Yeah. You know, sounded a little weird, that sentence. The doctor put his hands on me. He touched me. I was in shock.

[Kathryn Grody]

You have to touch me. Well, it's actually true. They use machines.

[Mandy Patinkin]

Are you still in therapy? Don't cancel. I have a question.

[Gideon Grody Patinkin]

When you guys were kids, you know, there was also darkness and fear. You were afraid of, you know, missile crisis. I mean, nuclear war. You did exercises in school.

[Kathryn Grody]

Under the desk. No, I remember dry. They sent us all home in the Cuban missile crisis from high school. I had just driven, I think my first time driving, you know, a car to high school. And we were all sent home so we could be with our families when we Die. I think that's a really important point, kid, that I want to say share with Shaida. I think history, they're not teaching it very well in school. I was not taught a lot of history that I'm catching up on and I really think it's helpful. Your kid is 11, Shada. She he can know about the historical perspective is really helping me at this point. I listen to Heather Cox Richardson. I read her. It helps me to know that in 1865 this horrible thing happened. Do you know to get a perspective.

[Gideon Grody Patinkin]

This is a lot of. This is circuitous and you can also

[Kathryn Grody]

get out of it and it reminds you of hey, Voting Rights Act, 1965. Ouch. Sorry. I just hit the microphone and said ouch. That was very.

[Gideon Grody Patinkin]

Did it hurt?

[Kathryn Grody]

No, I was afraid I hurt the microphone that it had. I have a thing with inanimate object hunting feelings. But anyway, I think history is helpful that you look at this dark time which we've overcome, what we've learned, what we haven't learned, what we're still trying to learn. So that you have some perspective that this isn't the absolute worst moment ever.

[Mandy Patinkin]

Yeah,

[Julie Louis-Dreyfus]

Hey, it's Julie, Louis Dreyfus from wiser than me, etc. Just popping in with a little reality check. Food waste shouldn't exist. There is no reason that our leftovers should end up in a landfill. But that's the final destination for about a third of the food we grow. Our ancestors would be confused. They use their food scraps as compost or as animal feed, or in weird soups, all the stuff we did before garbage was invented. But composting is hard work. Living with a bucket of rotten food on your counter is gross. Most food goes in the trash because it's the easy. And these days, we'll take any easy we can get. But now there's something easier. Drop your scraps in a mill food recycler. It looks like a kitchen bin and an iPhone had a baby. It takes nearly anything, even meat and bones. It works automatically. You can keep filling it for weeks and it never smells. When you finally empty it, you've got these nutrient rich grounds. Use them in your garden, pour them in your green bin or or have mill get them to a small farm so the food you don't eat can help grow the food you do, just like it should be. It's why I own a mill, why I invest in mill, and why I'm still obsessed with my mill. If you want to get obsessed too, go to mill.com wiser to get $75 off. That's mill.com wiser for $75 off.

[Sponsor/Announcer]

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[Gideon Grody Patinkin]

Mom and dad, please put your headphones on. So recently, I made a new friend.

[Mandy Patinkin]

You made a new friend?

[Gideon Grody Patinkin]

Yep. And we talk a lot about friendship on this show and get many questions about how hard it is to make friends. I feel very lucky to have encountered an extraordinary person. Many moments of serendipity brought her into our lives, and I'd like to bring her on. To help us with a question, please say hello to Doris Peltzman.

[Mandy Patinkin]

Hey, Doris. How are you?

[Gideon Grody Patinkin]

Welcome, Doris.

[Kathryn Grody]

Hi.

[Doris Peltzman]

So good to be in your presence again.

[Mandy Patinkin]

It's wonderful to see you.

[Gideon Grody Patinkin]

I'm so glad you're here. Thank you for joining us on this.

[Mandy Patinkin]

Are you in your art studio?

[Doris Peltzman]

No, I'm in my home. My art studio is in a state of disaster now because I'm moving to a larger studio.

[Mandy Patinkin]

That's for a good reason.

[Gideon Grody Patinkin]

Let me just introduce you, Doris, for our listeners. Doris Peltzman is an artist, a former principal with a PhD in education, and Doris is turning 93 years old tomorrow.

[Kathryn Grody]

Oh, my God.

[Mandy Patinkin]

Happy birthday.

[Kathryn Grody]

Happy birthday.

[Doris Peltzman]

Thank you.

[Gideon Grody Patinkin]

And Doris, where are we reaching you today?

[Doris Peltzman]

In my condo in Philadelphia.

[Gideon Grody Patinkin]

In Philadelphia. And I just want to tell folks the story of how we met real quick. And then you can add to it to make it better.

[Doris Peltzman]

Okay, I hope.

[Gideon Grody Patinkin]

Here's what I remember. I was going down to see my mom's show, the Unexpected Thing third, in Malvern, Pennsylvania, and I was in Philadelphia. The show was all sold out and I had an extra spare ticket the following night. And I said to my friends Rocky and Jenna, I said, hey, do you know anybody in town who might appreciate an extra ticket? And they lit up and they said, doris. I said, who's Doris? They said, we met her a couple days ago. We wandered into her art studio. She's a beautiful painter and she's in her 90s. And we started talking about stuff and had a great philosophical conversation. And we think she loved that show. So we called you up. It was a very confusing, out of the blue offer. I said I would drive to your condo, pick you up, drive you an hour to the theater, drive you home. And the next thing we knew, we were in the car together and I was talking to, I think, your daughter in law, trying to make sure she knew I was not kidnapping you or some scammer. And then we went to my mom's show and had a great night and a great conversation. And now we know each other, right?

[Kathryn Grody]

I think I bent down to kiss your hand or your feet or something. Then had a little trouble getting up. But not too bad after your show.

[Doris Peltzman]

Well, I'm kind of small and I remember you gave me a very warming hug and I felt like I knew you all my life.

[Kathryn Grody]

Yeah, I love that. That was a wonderful feeling. That was such a great surprise.

[Gideon Grody Patinkin]

What do you remember from that evening in our adventure, Doris?

[Doris Peltzman]

I remember when I met you, Gideon, that I felt I had always known you. And you reminded me, and I believe we talked about that. You reminded me very much of one of my grandsons. Because he's like your counterpart. You're like bookends in your humanity and ease of conversation and interests and creativity. And it was just this. I felt I was out with a friend that I had known for years.

[Gideon Grody Patinkin]

Me too. My friend that took about five minutes to get there.

[Kathryn Grody]

That's right.

[Doris Peltzman]

That's right.

[Kathryn Grody]

Doris, were you. Does this happen often? Do you feel that you are seen by younger people? You had this experience with Gideon inviting you someplace. Do you feel that is what happens to you a lot or is it very unusual?

[Doris Peltzman]

It's not unusual, but I think this situation, this particular experience was very, very unusual. And there were just so many similarities and such serendipity that I believe. Gideon, I said to you, this is Bersheart, right? I felt it was bashir. You know, sometimes you meet people and it's meet, greet, delete,

[Gideon Grody Patinkin]

share. What bashert means for non Yiddish.

[Doris Peltzman]

Yes. Bershert is a Hebrew word that means meant to be. Something is just meant to happen. Meant to be. Meant to make it connection, Right? I guess.

[Kathryn Grody]

No, I love that you felt that. And I love that you were so open to that adventure, Doris, which I think is a really good example for people. Do you know, of any age to be open to the unexpected and what comes through your door that you weren't anticipating, but just to be open to something new? Yes.

[Doris Peltzman]

And in my later chapters of my life, I realize now especially that when someone comes knocking at your door, you have to open it. You have to go there, because if you don't, you might miss a fantastic adventure.

[Kathryn Grody]

Yeah.

[Doris Peltzman]

But I want to back up a minute because I felt, you know, when I said, meet, greet, delete, I didn't feel that way, Gideon, with you or your family, I felt it was meet, greet, repeat.

[Gideon Grody Patinkin]

I love that, Doris. We felt the same way. Felt the same way. We got a question that made us think of you, and I wanted to share it and see what you guys all thought of it. This is from Luke. He wrote, hi, Mandy, Catherine, and Gideon. And I'm sure Doris. Doris. He just didn't know at the time. My question is short but not simple. How do you protect your creative spark when life keeps interrupting? And does getting older make creativity harder or easier? Thank you both for inspiring my creativity. Doris, you're an artist and still working in painting. How do you keep making art when you're working and raising children? Or do you have any advice for people about protecting the creative side of yourself?

[Kathryn Grody]

And how has it been impacted by the age you are now than when you first picked up a paintbrush?

[Doris Peltzman]

Wow, that's a big question. And for the first part of the question, today is not yesterday. So when I was younger, how did I keep creativity in my life? It was difficult. It was difficult because I felt, in retrospect, it's as if I had jumped on a train. Once you have a child, it's no longer a life about you. It's you. You disappear. And that new life, or I was lucky enough to have two sons, as you have, totally alters your own ego. I felt like I was On a train, and there just were no stops along the way. You just hop on that train and you're a w. And then you know it. You're a mother, and then you're maybe back in your profession. So there was no getting off that treadmill or that train. Now how do I fit it in? It's very easy. I just say to myself, doris, what will make you happy today? And if I'm not happy, I can't make my family happy. So call it selfish, call it ego, call it whatever I try to do or be in a place that brings me some kind of joy, some kind of joy into my life.

[Gideon Grody Patinkin]

Do you feel your creativity is different now than when you were younger?

[Doris Peltzman]

Yes. Yes, I guess I do, because I see things differently. I have more peripheral vision. They say as you get older, you get wiser. I don't know if you get wiser, but it's certainly, if you allow, allows you to broaden your whole entire life. So I think. I think there is a difference. There is a difference.

[Gideon Grody Patinkin]

What about you, mom and dad? Do you feel your creativity has changed throughout the years in a way you can track? I mean, dad, you're the baby of the group at 74.

[Mandy Patinkin]

73.

[Gideon Grody Patinkin]

I thought you just turned 74.

[Mandy Patinkin]

I just turned 73.

[Kathryn Grody]

Hello.

[Sponsor/Announcer]

Hello.

[Gideon Grody Patinkin]

You're the baby of the group at 73.

[Mandy Patinkin]

You need to improve your peripheral vision.

[Doris Peltzman]

That's right.

[Gideon Grody Patinkin]

What about your creativity? Do you feel that you felt it's changed within you as you've gotten older or you've done more projects, or have you felt like that kind of process of creating things or having ideas has stayed kind of the same throughout the years?

[Mandy Patinkin]

I never think of it as creativity. I never think of it as a creative act. I think of it as being alive. I wake up, I need to learn a song. I wake up, I've got to learn some words for a job. I wake up, I've got to go take my grandson somewhere.

[Gideon Grody Patinkin]

But you have ideas of how songs flow together. You have ideas for projects. What if we link this here and did that there? That would be interesting.

[Mandy Patinkin]

That's called work. To me, that's. I go to work and I sit with my piano player and we look at endless lists of 13 hours worth of songs and lyrics and stories. I like songs that are all about stories. And I go to work and we work for three, four hours a day. And at the end of X amount of days, we have a new song cycle, which I call a show. And that's the kind of job I take I'm not a brain surgeon or a heart surgeon, but I've been in 17 open heart surgeries. That was one of the most creative things I've ever witnessed. It's miraculous what they're doing. And I think all of us need to recognize that our existence has the possibility and potential of being miraculous. We're here for just a moment, and it is an amazing privilege. And we waste so much of that privilege by worrying that we've wasted it as opposed to celebrating what we've done. I'm speaking to myself. Mandy, are you listening to yourself? Are you hearing what you're saying? Can you please try to do more of what you're saying?

[Gideon Grody Patinkin]

That's great advice to yourself.

[Mandy Patinkin]

Yeah, if I could hear it.

[Gideon Grody Patinkin]

What about you, Ma? Have you felt your creativity? Has.

[Kathryn Grody]

I think the worst thing I do in terms of my creativity, Doris, is compare myself and my work today with what I did 25 years ago. If I start going down that routine. You know, when I first did a solo show, I played myself. I played my 7 year old, I played my 3 year old and another one, I played everybody, all these characters and walked and talked differently. And I thought that was sort of the height of an actor's life, you know, and craft. And there were times with the unexpected third. I would go, God, I'm just. I'm just being me. That's not as creative, that's not as good. And then there were other times I thought, no, it's actually a growth because now I don't have to hide behind other characters and other people. I'm just me naked here. I am, you know, as naked as I'm going to be soulfully out there. And that is a different kind of creativity. Do you know,

[Gideon Grody Patinkin]

Doris, I had two. Two other questions I wanted to ask you if it's okay.

[Doris Peltzman]

Sure.

[Gideon Grody Patinkin]

One was it's. It's pretty special to get to be in your 90s. Not everybody gets to do that. You've had, you share with me that you have a bunch of family members that made it to their 90s and beyond. So you've got great genes, clearly working for you. But I'm curious, what's a thing that you enjoy about the way people treat you being in your 90s, and the thing that is irritating about the way people treat you?

[Mandy Patinkin]

Great question. Question.

[Doris Peltzman]

Yeah, it is a great question.

[Gideon Grody Patinkin]

First, a good, good thing. Yeah.

[Doris Peltzman]

It really irritates me when people look at me and kind of count the years on my face or the lines on my face or whatever, and they assume and you know what the word assume really means?

[Gideon Grody Patinkin]

Trouble.

[Doris Peltzman]

They assume that I'm not cognizant, or they assume that I'm weak and frail because I am small, or they assume that I have not a clue of what they're speaking to me about. Those things truly upset me, and the things that I find are lovely. And I just kind of fell on this recently because where I live in Philadelphia, it's the oldest part of Philadelphia, so there are many cobblestone streets. So when I go out in Philadelphia for a walk or to the store or whatever, I use a walker. When I'm in my home, I use nothing. If I'm going to a family celebration to keep my family happy, I take a cane just to assure them. But I find that young people have been very gracious. And if they see me struggling to open a very heavy door in the wind, they. They open the door, or they ask if they can help. And the other day, I was coming home from a store, and I had my flowers, which I keep regularly around me, because not only do I love to paint them, I love to look at them. I love to smell them. I have to have them just like music. I have to. It has to be part of my soul, part of my everyday life. So I was carrying home on my walker, two bags with groceries and a bouquet of flowers, and the wind grabbed me. I live sort of in a wind tunnel entrance and pulled all the packages off of my little dancing partner, and there go the flowers. And there was a young man walking by, and he didn't even ask, could I help you? He just came over and was so gracious. And things like that I love.

[Kathryn Grody]

Yeah, yeah. I've always believed that people, by their nature, by our nature as humans, if you saw somebody fall in front of you, the instinct for most people would be to help somebody up. Unless there was a weapon at their head preventing them from doing that. And even then, some people still help

[Gideon Grody Patinkin]

people up, you know, I had an interesting experience recently. I was down on Riverside by the water in Riverside park, and a skateboarder had broken his leg or blown out his knee, and his friend was carrying him up a steep flight of stairs on his back. And I jumped in. I said, hey, do you need help getting up? Because there's like 20 flights of stairs to get onto Riverside Drive from the bottom of Riverside Park. And they said, yeah. And two out of the three guys didn't speak English, and they only spoke Spanish. I did my best with my Spanish. And people were coming by saying, call the Call the cops because the ambulance will come help you. And they didn't want to call the ambulance because they were afraid of ICE or immigration. So it was a wild, a little wild moment of just that kind of help when you just see somebody in need of it with also just kind of the fear of what everyone's going through.

[Kathryn Grody]

People seem quite surprised at these little interactions that are civil with strangers in a community, you know, And I think the more accidents like that, the more we remember to practice being that part of being in a community is just stranger related, you know?

[Gideon Grody Patinkin]

Yeah. Before we go, I just want to ask this. This show is about coming together, sharing advice and wisdom and experiences. And you're talking about connecting to folks. I'm curious, what's a piece of life advice that you'd give to someone out listening who's in their 20s or 30s

[Mandy Patinkin]

or 70s or 70s advice?

[Gideon Grody Patinkin]

But I'm curious. Yeah. From your vantage point?

[Doris Peltzman]

Well, I tell my sons and my family, I don't give advice. I give recommendations.

[Gideon Grody Patinkin]

That's great.

[Mandy Patinkin]

Well done.

[Doris Peltzman]

I love that.

[Gideon Grody Patinkin]

What would be your recommendation?

[Doris Peltzman]

I think just keep growing. Maybe that's it. Just don't stop. Just get off that train, whatever train you're on, where you just feel propelled to go from one thing to the next. Just take the train.

[Kathryn Grody]

Don't take the train. Don't stay on the same train your whole life in the same seat or

[Doris Peltzman]

get off at different stations.

[Kathryn Grody]

Yeah, exactly. Exactly.

[Doris Peltzman]

And just connecting with the both of you and with Gideon. Gideon, you especially have touched my heart.

[Gideon Grody Patinkin]

Likewise. Likewise, my friend.

[Doris Peltzman]

And this was a wonderful experience.

[Kathryn Grody]

Yeah. And so it continues.

[Gideon Grody Patinkin]

Thank you. Thank you so much for being a part of making this with us. And thanks to your son for helping out over there with the technical bits. And I will see you in Philadelphia, too, next time I come down to visit friends.

[Doris Peltzman]

Definitely. Take care.

[Kathryn Grody]

Thank you, Doris. See you soon. Until. Bye.

[Doris Peltzman]

Bye.

[Gideon Grody Patinkin]

Bye. Bye.

[Sponsor/Announcer]

Be well.

[Gideon Grody Patinkin]

I don't give advice. I give recommendations.

[Kathryn Grody]

Recommendations.

[Gideon Grody Patinkin]

That's great.

[Kathryn Grody]

She's really great.

[Mandy Patinkin]

I love that she calls her walker her dancing partner.

[Kathryn Grody]

Her dancing partner was so great.

[Gideon Grody Patinkin]

And I love that she brings her cane just as a kindness to her children. Children, grandchildren and great grandchildren. Okay, we're at our hang time segment and our game today is called would you'd rather.

[Mandy Patinkin]

I thought we hang time at the beginning.

[Kathryn Grody]

That was the other segment. Oh.

[Gideon Grody Patinkin]

We hang time all over the place. Depending on.

[Mandy Patinkin]

We just hung with doors.

[Gideon Grody Patinkin]

That's right. The whole show is really Hang time.

[Mandy Patinkin]

That's a good title.

[Gideon Grody Patinkin]

Okay, so this one's called. Would you rather. Don't overthink it. Just choose quickly. Okay. Would you rather live inside a beautiful house with an ugly view or an ugly house with a beautiful view?

[Kathryn Grody]

Ugly house with a beautiful view.

[Mandy Patinkin]

Ugly house. Beautiful view.

[Kathryn Grody]

Okay.

[Gideon Grody Patinkin]

Would you rather be perpetually itchy or perpetually sneezy?

[Mandy Patinkin]

Sneezy.

[Kathryn Grody]

Sneezy. Okay.

[Gideon Grody Patinkin]

Would you rather show up to a party overdressed or underdressed?

[Mandy Patinkin]

Overdressed. Because you can shed clothing.

[Kathryn Grody]

Yeah, overdress. Okay, that's good. But that's very funny, honey, because you're never overdressed.

[Gideon Grody Patinkin]

You guys are aligned on these.

[Kathryn Grody]

Yes.

[Gideon Grody Patinkin]

First time I've heard you agree on it.

[Mandy Patinkin]

I wish it was a marriage show and we could win some furniture or.

[Gideon Grody Patinkin]

Oh, yeah, kitchen sitting. Yeah, you can win that chair you're sitting in.

[Kathryn Grody]

Yeah.

[Gideon Grody Patinkin]

Okay. Would you rather have peanut butter constantly coming out of your ears or feet made out of chocolate?

[Mandy Patinkin]

Feet made out of chocolate.

[Gideon Grody Patinkin]

Why?

[Mandy Patinkin]

Because I would suck Mom's toes to my heart's desire as long as they were dark chocolate toes.

[Gideon Grody Patinkin]

Wait, this is your own body?

[Doris Peltzman]

Yeah.

[Kathryn Grody]

Your own body.

[Gideon Grody Patinkin]

You'd suck your own toes?

[Mandy Patinkin]

I'd suck my fingers because I don't want to hurt my back sucking my toes.

[Gideon Grody Patinkin]

Your hands aren't made out of chocolate. Your feet are made out of chocolate.

[Kathryn Grody]

All right, this is.

[Gideon Grody Patinkin]

I just need to be clear. Would you rather have peanut butter coming out of your ears constantly?

[Mandy Patinkin]

Yes. No.

[Gideon Grody Patinkin]

I don't want feet made out of chocolate.

[Mandy Patinkin]

Feet made out of chocolate.

[Gideon Grody Patinkin]

Okay, Mom.

[Kathryn Grody]

Feet made out of chocolate.

[Gideon Grody Patinkin]

Are you not concerned about walking around drinking?

[Kathryn Grody]

Yeah, I am. And I'm just thinking of peanut butter leaking from my ears and getting over everything.

[Mandy Patinkin]

You go to Trader Joe's and you buy one of those dark chocolate bars, you know, 80% or 70 some percent, you can't break it. You can't break a square. You know, it's divided. Good luck. Bring a saw.

[Gideon Grody Patinkin]

So that's the kind of chocolate.

[Mandy Patinkin]

That's the kind of chocolate I want my feet out of the.

[Gideon Grody Patinkin]

Would you rather have very heavy elbows or floaty knees filled with helium?

[Mandy Patinkin]

Heavy elbows, Floating knees. Floating knees filled with healing. Floating knees filled with healing.

[Gideon Grody Patinkin]

Yeah.

[Mandy Patinkin]

No question.

[Kathryn Grody]

Nobody else but you could come up with these. What would you rather, kid?

[Gideon Grody Patinkin]

Would you rather have two noses or three eyes?

[Mandy Patinkin]

Three eyes.

[Kathryn Grody]

Three eyes.

[Gideon Grody Patinkin]

Yeah.

[Kathryn Grody]

Yeah.

[Mandy Patinkin]

That smell's not a big deal to me. Well, I mean, matter of fact, if something smells bad, I'd like not to smell it.

[Gideon Grody Patinkin]

What if something looks bad? Would you like not to see it?

[Mandy Patinkin]

Nope. I look at things that are hard to look at all the time, and

[Kathryn Grody]

it gives you more perspective.

[Gideon Grody Patinkin]

Okay. More perspective.

[Kathryn Grody]

Okay. Yeah.

[Gideon Grody Patinkin]

Nice.

[Sponsor/Announcer]

Wow.

[Gideon Grody Patinkin]

Did you guys agree on all. Okay, last one. Would you rather end this episode now or keep going for another two hours?

[Mandy Patinkin]

End it soon. Not now, but soon.

[Kathryn Grody]

Not three hours.

[Mandy Patinkin]

Yeah, you know what? Now.

[Kathryn Grody]

Okay. Goodbye, everybody. It's a short one.

[Mandy Patinkin]

You're with me on that, aren't you?

[Doris Peltzman]

I'm not.

[Mandy Patinkin]

You want to do three more hours?

[Gideon Grody Patinkin]

Well, not two.

[Sponsor/Announcer]

Three.

[Gideon Grody Patinkin]

No. That's the only choice. That's the. Would you rather end this episode now? I keep going for two hours.

[Kathryn Grody]

This is the end of the episode.

[Gideon Grody Patinkin]

This is my creative way of ending the episode.

[Kathryn Grody]

End the episode.

[Mandy Patinkin]

Help the man out, will you?

[Kathryn Grody]

Okay. Great way to end it, kid.

[Mandy Patinkin]

If anyone are screaming at home, you can hear them. You know? What's that thing in network, you know, I've had?

[Kathryn Grody]

I'm not gonna take it.

[Mandy Patinkin]

I'm not gonna take it anymore.

[Kathryn Grody]

What is it?

[Mandy Patinkin]

What is it? What is that whole phrase?

[Gideon Grody Patinkin]

You know, Ryan, I'm not as fast.

[Mandy Patinkin]

I'm not gonna take it anymore. Okay.

[Gideon Grody Patinkin]

I just want to say out there, if there's any illustrators or animators and you want to draw a picture of my parents living inside an ugly house with a beautiful view, being perpetually itchy, overdressed with chocolate feet and floaty knees with three eyes, we totally welcome that. And if you get in touch in the email, we can.

[Kathryn Grody]

I'd be very curious to see.

[Gideon Grody Patinkin]

We'd love to see that.

[Mandy Patinkin]

Or a needlepoint of the same nature.

[Gideon Grody Patinkin]

Yes. Yes. All needle points. Welcome. Thanks, everybody, for tuning in. We want to hear from you more questions, stories, advice for us, advice for your pets, pet communicators, recipes, dreams, riddles,

[Mandy Patinkin]

poems, and it's almost Mandy's nap time.

[Gideon Grody Patinkin]

That's right.

[Mandy Patinkin]

Yes, it's almost time.

[Gideon Grody Patinkin]

If you have any of that, you can send an email to askmandyandcatherinemail.com or check out our socials. Is Mandy sleeping? Of course. Check out our socials for an easy way to send us a voice note. Don't forget to subscribe and leave us a review on your podcast app if you're enjoying this thing. That's Becky. That's her review. If you aren't enjoying it, you probably don't want to waste your time leaving a review because life is short, right?

[Kathryn Grody]

Yeah, Life is short.

[Gideon Grody Patinkin]

Thanks for being here. And please remember, Don't Listen to Us.

[Kathryn Grody]

Don't Listen to Us.

[Gideon Grody Patinkin]

Don't Listen to Us is a Lemonada Media original hosted by Mandy Patinkin, Kathryn Grody and Gideon Grody Patinkin Created by Katrina Onstad, Debbie Pacheco and Gideon Grody Patinkin. Executive producers are Kathryn Grody, Gideon Grody Pudinkin, Mandy Padinkin, Katrina Onstadt, Debbie Pacheco, Jessica Cordova Kramer and Stephanie Whittles Wax. Our engineer is Ryan Derringer of Welterweight Sound. Video and audio production by Mark Whiteway of Bellows Media. You can watch on CNN.com watch or the CNN app. If you haven't subscribed to Lemonada Media Premium yet, now's the perfect time. You can hear Don't Listen to us completely ad free. Plus you'll unlock exclusive bonus content like behind the scenes conversations, questions so weird they didn't make it on air, Becky the Dog shenanigans and more. Just tap the subscribe button on Apple podcasts. Head to lemonadapremium.com to subscribe on any other app or listen ad free on Amazon Music with your prime membership. That's lemonadapremium.com don't miss out.