Podcast Summary: Don't Listen To Us with Mandy Patinkin and Kathryn Grody
Episode: Risking It All to Become an Artist – and the Truth about Elmo
Release Date: January 14, 2026
Host: Lemonada Media
Main Participants: Mandy Patinkin, Kathryn Grody, Gideon Grody Patinkin, Special Guest Bill Gerber
Overview
This episode dives deep into the messy, honest, and often hilarious world of making personal and professional choices as artists—especially when those choices seem risky or out of step with a tumultuous world. With spirited listener questions as a jumping-off point, Mandy, Kathryn, their son Gideon, and longtime friend Bill Gerber debate the "pet peeves" of daily life, the importance of manners, and, most significantly, whether pursuing a life in the arts is right for the next generation. Along the way, listeners get unfiltered showbiz stories, marital banter, and a surprisingly moving discussion about the value of connecting through art—even on (or especially on) a planet in crisis.
Key Discussion Points & Insights
1. Opening Banter: Relationships, Routines, and Sleep
[02:22 – 04:55]
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The episode jumps straight into familiar, familial chaos: breakfast habits, sleep routines, and affectionate teasing about memory and mottos.
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Kathryn reveals she's never slept 12 hours in her life, while Mandy brags about his marathon sleep and exhaustion from grandparenting.
- Quote:
"I passed out at 7:30pm and I woke up at 7:30am. I think that's pretty relatable."
— Mandy Patinkin [03:30]
- Quote:
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The family jokes about mottos and misremembered aphorisms (“Different strokes for different folks”).
2. Listener Question: The Case of the Excess Celery
[05:02 – 10:14]
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Listener Susan complains about having to buy too much celery at once and solicits advice.
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Kathryn pragmatically suggests sharing celery with friends (or animals: “Maybe find a nearby goat or llama.”)
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The trio riff on freezing celery, sharing with neighbors, and the mismatch between modern packaging and solo living.
- Quote:
“Or she could bring it to our house and it could rot with all the rest of your celery.”
— Mandy Patinkin [06:05]
- Quote:
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This segues into a bit on mis-matched socks and how life’s annoyances can inspire business ideas.
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Mandy challenges the traditional ingredient choices for tuna salad, suggesting relish instead of celery ("piccalilli" in Chicago) [08:47].
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Kitchen skills are discussed, with Mandy anxiously prepping for an upcoming role as a chef and requesting knife lessons from the family.
3. Listener Question: What’s Happened to Manners and “Please”?
[12:23 – 20:33]
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Martha, a 57-year-old bookstore employee, laments that people don’t say “please” anymore.
- Quote:
"My issue is what happened to please in the world?... I find that people say thank you still, but they don't say please, which really bothers me."
— Martha (listener) [12:36]
- Quote:
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Kathryn identifies the broader social loss of manners and how screens and pandemic isolation erode human connection.
- Quote:
"It's just not manners. It's bigger than that...You don't have to say please or thank you or be recognized—a machine."
— Kathryn Grody [13:56]
- Quote:
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Mandy admits to working on not interrupting his wife mid-thought, joking about “marital listening skills.”
- Quote:
"I would like you to pay attention as this podcast proceeds to my learning curve of not interrupting my wife when she's speaking."
— Mandy Patinkin [15:45]
- Quote:
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Gideon observes that performance spaces—like podcasts and the stage—force participants to be better listeners.
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Kathryn reminisces about meaningful, thoughtful pauses in historic conversations, referencing James Baldwin and Bill Moyers, and how modern culture expects immediacy.
- Quote:
"We were comfortable with people thinking. And then he responded, I know. And we have been totally trained out of that modality."
— Kathryn Grody [18:14]
- Quote:
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The hosts agree: slowing down, practicing patience, and honoring shared social space is more important—and more radical—than ever.
- Quote:
"Taking time for thought, practicing that kind of nuance and patience and not thinking like a friggin machine where you click and then that's it."
— Kathryn Grody [19:57]
- Quote:
4. Call a Friend: Bill Gerber Joins for an Artist’s Dilemma
[22:13 – 36:40]
Introduction to Bill Gerber
- Gideon introduces Bill as a decades-long family friend, Broadway and documentary producer, interior designer, and “one of the greatest cooks on the planet.”
- The hosts celebrate old friendships and creative community.
Listener Neil’s Big Question: Does Art Matter When the World Is Burning?
[25:11 – 36:38]
- Neil, a recent high school graduate, wants to study theater in college but feels conflicted—should he focus on “more important” issues in a troubled world or follow his passion for acting?
- Quote:
"There's so much going on right now that needs our collective focus and attention. Part of me thinks I could or should be doing something else...But acting is my passion."
— Neil (listener) [25:16]
- Quote:
Bill Gerber:
- "Art is the only place we have freedom right now is what comes up to me. And you're free to do whatever you want with art because it's your voice." [26:25]
- Encourages volunteering for theater nonprofits in any capacity just to be in the community.
Kathryn Grody:
- Emphasizes the luck and power of having a passion, especially in strange times.
- Suggests Neil seek out innovative formats: “You will find like minded people...and talk to them about how you can create theater art in all sorts of ways that haven’t even been imagined before.” [27:35]
- References "Improv Everywhere" and urges openness to unconventional performance.
Mandy Patinkin:
- Passionate monologue about the power of theater as a space for real human connection, empathy, and even activism.
- Cites Arthur Miller as an example—great theater can change how people live and relate.
- Quote:
"If you go see a great playwright like Arthur Miller...and you see Death of a Salesman, if you're paying attention and you're a father, you go out and you call your son and you talk to him and you learn to listen." [31:09]
- Quote:
- Advises Neil (and all artists): “The only mistake you or anyone listening can make if you have the dream...is not to try, try, try, and try again. And if it doesn’t work out, then come up with plan B. But don’t make plan B before you try plan A.” [31:50]
Elmo in Grouchland Story
[32:41 – 33:43]
- Mandy tells a self-deprecating, vulnerable story about feeling he “failed Elmo” during a scene and the comfort he received from his therapist.
- Quote:
"I was ready to kill myself. I just thought I failed Elmo...I called my therapist to talk to my therapist about the fact that I let Elmo down…and my therapist said, just stay with the discomfort."
— Mandy Patinkin [33:29]
- Quote:
Bill Gerber on the Artist’s Life:
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Shares his own journey—starting tap dance at seven, being the only boy in his class, finding intoxicating joy in the arts. [33:48–34:26]
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Laments the removal of voices like Colbert from mainstream networks, underlining the ongoing need for uncensored artistic space. [35:09–35:41]
- Quote:
"The thing that's so great about the theater, there is no censorship. The artist rules. The writer rules. And that's what we need more of."
— Bill Gerber [35:41]
- Quote:
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Final advice to Neil: "Be brave. Don't censor yourself. Don't be afraid because everybody's afraid...and you're in a community of people who are all afraid. So everybody feels exactly the way you do." [35:58]
5. Theater Stories: Best and Worst Moments
[36:46 – 42:29]
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Gideon asks Kathryn and Mandy to share great or terrible experiences in the theater.
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Kathryn:
- Chooses seeing Philip Seymour Hoffman in Death of a Salesman as an unparalleled experience [37:16].
- Mentions Mandy’s Sunday in the Park with George as a litmus test for life compatibility (if someone didn’t like it: “goodbye”).
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Mandy:
- Recalls being overwhelmed by emotion watching Patti LuPone in Les Misérables, and being permanently changed by moments of "truthful" performance.
- Quote:
"When you see someone give it everything they have...that’s what I live for. And she gave it to me...It’s as good as it ever gets."
— Mandy Patinkin [39:19] - He refuses to name "terrible" experiences out of respect for fellow theater-makers.
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Together, they discuss the addictive, transformative nature of live theater and the relentless human search for those experiences.
Notable Quotes and Memorable Moments
- "My issue is what happened to please in the world?...I find that people say thank you still, but they don't say please, which really bothers me." — Martha [12:36]
- "It's a way of diminishing the experience that you're having with each other...I think it's great that you're saying, 'it was my pleasure.'" — Kathryn Grody [15:06]
- "Art is the only place we have freedom right now...and you're free to do whatever you want with art because it's your voice." — Bill Gerber [26:25]
- "I'd say in the theater, one of the great, great tasks...is not what you say, but how you listen." — Mandy Patinkin [31:19]
- "The only mistake you or anyone listening can make...is not to try, try, try, and try again...But don't make plan B before you try plan A." — Mandy Patinkin [31:50]
- "Be brave. Don't censor yourself. Don't be afraid because everybody's afraid." — Bill Gerber [35:58]
- "Truthful. Try that word out, folks. Truthful in this climate." — Mandy Patinkin [40:55]
Timestamps for Key Segments
- [02:22] – Family banter: breakfast, sleep, and life mottos
- [05:02] – Listener question about excess celery
- [12:23] – Listener Martha asks about the loss of “please”
- [22:13] – Introduction of Bill Gerber
- [25:11] – Neil’s question: is theater worth it in a troubled world?
- [26:25] – Bill Gerber’s passionate case for the freedom of art
- [31:09] – Mandy’s speech about theater as a space for listening and change
- [33:29] – Mandy’s “Elmo in Grouchland” therapy confession
- [36:46] – Kathryn and Mandy’s best (and not-worst) moments in theater
Tone and Style
Warm, witty, and brutally honest—this episode features equal measures of hard-earned wisdom, adamant disagreement, self-deprecation, and genuine encouragement. The hosts maintain their signature blend of bickering, playfulness, candid confessions, and respect for each other’s experience. Listeners are offered practical life advice, permission to pursue their passions in uncertain times, reassurance that fear is normal, and an implicit invitation into the ineffable, communal thrill of art.
In a Nutshell
- The Grody-Patinkin family (and friends) tackle the real dilemmas of art, purpose, and modern life—using humor, candor, and personal stories.
- Pursuing art in a chaotic world isn’t frivolous—it's a vital way to connect, to resist cultural decay, and to stay true to yourself.
- Whether your challenge is too much celery, the erosion of manners, or risking it all for your dream, you’re not alone—and you should “try plan A” first.
“Don’t listen to us… but try anyway.”
