The Dr. Laura Podcast

Episode: A Great Example of Raising a Competent Child
Host: Dr. Laura Schlessinger
Date: January 7, 2026

Overview

In this episode, Dr. Laura Schlessinger shares her insights on raising competent, resilient children, focusing on the essential and often distinct roles that mothers and fathers play in child development. Inspired by a touching Instagram video of a father encouraging his young son to overcome a physical challenge, Dr. Laura highlights how supportive risk-taking helps children build confidence and psychological strength. She emphasizes the importance of "letting kids figure it out" rather than rescuing or overprotecting them, especially as they grow.

Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. The Instagram Story: Overcoming Fear with Parental Support

• [01:16–04:20]
  • Dr. Laura describes watching a short video featuring a British father and his bundled-up young son at a playground.
  • The boy hesitantly approaches a springy plank toy, fearful and repeatedly expressing resistance: “No, no, no.”
  • The father calmly and persistently encourages: “Be brave. Stand up. You can do it.”
  • Despite his hesitation and whining, the boy finally stands, wobbles, and walks across with some support from the father’s foot steadying the plank, then is urged to jump off. After initial protest, the boy jumps—and immediately transforms, visibly excited and proud.

Memorable Quote:
“Be brave. Stand up. You can do it.”
—Father to son (as recounted by Dr. Laura, 03:10)

2. The Transformative Effect of Courage

• [04:20–06:33]
  • After overcoming the challenge, the boy’s behavior and attitude shift rapidly.
  • He hurries around the equipment, asking, “Daddy, let me do it,” requesting to try again—this time with less support and no whining.
  • Each successive attempt is more enthusiastic and independent.

Memorable Observation:
“The second he jumps off, this kid was transformed.”
—Dr. Laura (04:09)

3. Distinct Parental Roles: Safety vs. Growth

• [06:33–08:34]
  • Dr. Laura discusses the typical differences between maternal and paternal approaches:
    • Mothers usually focus on safety, security, protection.
    • Fathers encourage risk-taking, bravery, and tolerating discomfort.
  • She underscores that both influences are essential: “The balance of those two inputs helps make a kid emotionally and psychologically very healthy.”
  • Traditional maternal caution (“He could get hurt!”) stands in contrast to the father’s measured risk assessment and encouragement.

Notable Quote:
“It's not that moms are bad. Dads are good. It's just that moms and dads are there for different things.”
—Dr. Laura (07:43)

4. Building Competence by Letting Children Find Solutions

• [08:34–10:37]
  • Dr. Laura expresses her frequent advice to parents—especially mothers—to step back and not “baby” children too long, even into adulthood.
  • She advocates telling children, “I believe you will figure it out. I believe you will find a way to do it,” rather than stepping in to solve problems for them.
  • Allowing kids to face manageable risks fosters true competence, confidence, and self-reliance.

Key Takeaway Quote:
“How do you ever get a kid who's competent when you don't allow them to risk and get hurt and figure it out?”
—Dr. Laura (09:10)

Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• On the difference between parents:

  “Moms are into safety, security, protection. Dads are into risk taking, be brave, tolerate pain, tolerate fear.”
  —Dr. Laura (07:45)

• On fostering competence:

  “Let them figure it out. How's he ever going to grow up? How's she ever going to grow up? How can they ever feel good about themselves?”
  —Dr. Laura (09:15)

• Her personal reaction:

  “I enjoyed watching. In fact, I watched the whole thing twice because I got so happy about it.”
  —Dr. Laura (10:22)

Timestamps for Key Segments

• 01:16–04:20: Story of the father and son on the playground, initial challenge and breakthrough
• 06:33–08:34: Discussion of mother vs. father parenting styles and why both are necessary
• 08:34–10:37: Advice on letting children face challenges, and the importance of self-discovery and resilience

Conclusion

Dr. Laura passionately advocates for a balanced approach to parenting that allows for both nurturing and challenge. Through her thoughtful unpacking of a simple playground moment, she illustrates the real-world, lasting impact of encouraging kids to step past their fears and grow into competent adults. Her central message is clear and empowering: Give your children space to stumble, try, and triumph—because that's how confidence is built.