Podcast Summary: Dr. Laura Call of the Day – A Lesson for Young Moms on Keeping Control

Episode Details:

• Title: A Lesson for Young Moms on Keeping Control
• Host: Dr. Laura Schlessinger
• Release Date: July 11, 2025
• Platform: SiriusXM Triumph 111

Introduction

In this episode of Dr. Laura Call of the Day, Dr. Laura Schlessinger addresses the challenges faced by young mothers in maintaining control and harmony within a bustling household. The episode features a candid conversation between Dr. Laura and a distressed caller, Kayla, who seeks guidance on managing her family dynamics involving three young daughters.

Caller’s Situation: Kayla’s Background and Challenges

Kayla introduces herself as a mother of three daughters, the youngest being three and a half years old, who was born eight months ago. Since the arrival of her latest child, Kayla has felt overwhelmed and believes she has lost control over her household.

Kayla:
“… I have three children and just had my last little girl. They're all girls about eight months ago. And ever since then I feel like I have lost control of the home, the home front situation. I have a middle child, she's three and a half. And she's been very challenging for me to deal with since I've had the baby. And yeah, it's just been, it's been hard for me, hard for the family.”
(00:49)

Initial Discussion on Control and Sibling Rivalry

Dr. Laura seeks to understand the specifics of Kayla’s sense of lost control, probing for details about the household dynamics.

Dr. Laura:
“I don't know what you mean, lack of control. Until I understand that, I don't know how you get it back.”
(01:29)

Kayla elaborates on her concerns about her middle child’s behavior, suggesting possible separation anxiety, which has led to aggressive actions like biting her baby.

Dr. Laura’s Advice on Empowering the Challenging Child

Dr. Laura identifies sibling rivalry as a central issue and proposes empowering the challenging child by involving her in decision-making to reduce her need to act out.

Dr. Laura:
“…putting the difficult kid in charge. Not you, the kid. She's going to be acting out less if she doesn't have to fight against something.”
(02:26)

She advises assigning the middle child small responsibilities, such as choosing the baby’s clothes or selecting meals, to make her feel important and reduce disruptive behavior.

Managing Overwhelm and Reality of Parenting Multiple Kids

Kayla admits feeling overwhelmed, especially when trying to juggle attention between her children. Dr. Laura empathizes and reframes the situation by highlighting the unrealistic expectation of maintaining total control with three young children.

Dr. Laura:
“Your problem is not how to handle it. Your problem is thinking you can handle it.”
(03:45)

She emphasizes that feeling overwhelmed is a natural response and reassures Kayla that her efforts are commendable.

Handling Social Life and Friend Visits

Kayla expresses reluctance to host friends due to her children’s behavior. Dr. Laura suggests practical solutions like arranging for a sitter or involving her spouse to allow time for social interactions without the stress of managing the children’s attention.

Dr. Laura:
“What you can do is get a sitter, say, husband, I love you. You want great sex later? Here, you watch the kids.”
(06:58)

Addressing Children’s Need for Attention and Love

The conversation shifts to the emotional needs of the children, particularly how the arrival of the youngest can lead older siblings to feel less loved or attention-starved.

Dr. Laura:
“They think it subtracts. So now each one of them, the youngest one doesn't think about anything, but the other two think, okay, I only get a third of the attention and love.”
(07:56)

Kayla finds this perspective heartbreaking but acknowledges the truth in it, understanding the importance of balancing attention among her children.

Implementing Positive Interactions Between Siblings

To foster positive relationships and reduce competition among her daughters, Dr. Laura advises Kayla to encourage and recognize acts of kindness and cooperation between them.

Dr. Laura:
“Compliment each kid for doing something for another kid. Like, for example, when you hang up, are you on a cell phone? Walk over to where the kids are coloring. Wait till I give you your assignment… ‘I like that you shared your crayons. That is so sweet of you.’”
(09:33)

Live Application of Advice and Positive Outcome

In a live demonstration, Kayla follows Dr. Laura’s advice by complimenting her daughters on their cooperative behavior. The positive reinforcement leads to immediate and heartwarming responses from her children.

Kayla:
“Hey, Ava. I really like how you showed Haley to write mom a couple minutes ago. I really like that and appreciate it. Thank you so much.”
(10:42)

Both children respond with smiles, indicating a successful reduction in tension and improved sibling relations.

Conclusion and Contact Information

Dr. Laura concludes the session by acknowledging the progress made and providing her contact information for further support.

Dr. Laura:
“My number one, 800-375-2872. Check out my social media on Facebook and Instagram… you can find me at facebook.com DrLaura and instagram.com DrLauraprogram.”
(12:05)

Key Takeaways

• Empower Challenging Siblings: Involve the child in small decisions to reduce the need for negative attention-seeking behaviors.
• Realistic Expectations: Acknowledge the difficulty of maintaining complete control with multiple young children and practice self-compassion.
• Utilize Support Systems: Engage spouses, sitters, or trusted individuals to create opportunities for necessary personal time and social interactions.
• Foster Positive Sibling Relationships: Encourage and recognize cooperative behavior among siblings to build a supportive family environment.

Notable Quotes:

• “Your problem is not how to handle it. Your problem is thinking you can handle it.”
   — Dr. Laura Schlessinger (03:45)

• “Compliment each kid for doing something for another kid… ‘I like that you shared your crayons. That is so sweet of you.’”
   — Dr. Laura Schlessinger (09:33)

• “Mommy, Mommy. This is how you keep control.”
   — Kayla (11:56)

This episode provides valuable insights for young mothers navigating the complexities of parenting multiple children, emphasizing empathy, realistic expectations, and proactive strategies to foster a harmonious household.