Podcast Summary: The Dr. Laura Podcast

Episode: A Mantra To Cope With Sadness
Date: January 28, 2026
Host: Dr. Laura Schlessinger
Guest Caller: Jessica

Overview

This episode centers on helping Jessica, a listener going through post-divorce emotional struggles, craft a daily mantra to better cope with sadness and move forward. After leaving her alcoholic husband for the health and well-being of herself and her teenage son, Jessica seeks Dr. Laura’s guidance on emotional detachment, recentering her moral compass, and how to model resilience for her child.

Key Discussion Points and Insights

Jessica’s Background and Emotional Struggle

• [01:32] Jessica explains: She divorced in 2022 due to her husband’s deepening alcoholism, after years of marriage that began in 2011.
• [02:13] Jessica has one 14-year-old son. The father-son relationship is “very, very awful.” Her ex-husband’s health deteriorated drastically due to alcoholism—hospitalized with kidney failure and strokes, needing emergency intervention from Jessica.
• Emotional Anchor: Jessica didn’t divorce due to lack of love. She still cares for her ex-husband when he is sober, admitting, “when he is sober, he’s really, really good... [but] it’s very infrequent.” The attachment lingers and hinders her ability to move on.

Dr. Laura’s Guidance on Emotional Setting

• [03:33] Dr. Laura reframes: “You have to sit there and go, he’s hopeless. But for what it was in the beginning, I still have affection, but I’m getting on with my life and taking care of my boy… It’s a tragedy, it’s very sad. But don’t die over this.”
• [04:28] Jessica struggles with “leaving this in the rear view and looking in the windshield.” Dr. Laura reassures her: “You’ll get used to it. You’re overthinking it.”

The Mantra: Focusing on the Present and Letting Go

• [06:59] Dr. Laura prescribes: “Every day, Jessica, get up and say, he’s a lost cause, but I got a great son out of it and some good memories. Now what am I going to do today to cherish the fact I’m alive and free from it?”
  • Memorable Moment [07:53]: Dr. Laura insists Jessica recite the mantra herself, correcting her repeatedly until she includes all elements: acceptance of loss, acknowledgment of good memories, love for her son, and embracing daily joy.
    • Final version, Jessica:
      “I’m going to get up every morning and say, he is a lost cause and very sad. But I have some great memories and a wonderful son. And today I am going to show joyousness for all that I am capable of.” [08:38]
  • Dr. Laura: “You have to say [the mantra] every day, like a rebooting computer. Because you’re going to get up and be whiny mony in your head, on and off. So if you go directly to your mantra, it is a big change in direction.” [08:53]

Supporting Her Son

• [09:30] Jessica asks: How do I help my son not cling to hope regarding his father?
  • Dr. Laura responds: “I'd have to talk to him. I can't do that through you. I don't know him.” [09:36]
  • However, she emphasizes: “The more positive an outlook and progression you make, the better it is on him and for him.” [09:47]
  • “Because he learns it from you.” [10:00]
  • Dr. Laura corrects Jessica’s belief that her son does not see her struggle: “Yes, he does. Yes, he does. Yes, he does. You’re incorrect. Of course he does… You think you’re hiding it. You’re not. We don’t. We can’t. So you really have to do the work. You can’t fake this.” [10:09-10:19]

Mourn, but Move Forward

• [10:46] Dr. Laura (emphatically): “Yeah, well, sorry. That’s what happens when we marry a drunkard.”

Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• Dr. Laura on Detachment:

  “You don't have to get more dramatic. It’s a tragedy, it’s very sad. But don’t die over this.” [03:33]

• On the Mantra:

  “Every day, Jessica, get up and say, he’s a lost cause, but I got a great son out of it and some good memories. Now what am I going to do today to cherish the fact I’m alive and free from it?” [06:59]

• On Teaching Her Son by Example:

  “The more positive an outlook and progression you make, the better it is on him and for him. Because he learns it from you.” [09:47-10:00]

• Regarding Children Noticing Parental Struggles:

  “You think you’re hiding it. You’re not. We don’t. We can’t. So you really have to do the work. You can’t fake this.” [10:09-10:19]

• Hard Truth About Past Choices:

  “Yeah, well, sorry. That’s what happens when we marry a drunkard.” [10:46]

Key Timestamps

• 01:32-03:26 – Jessica’s story: Divorce, son, ex-husband’s condition, and residual emotional pain
• 03:33-04:28 – Dr. Laura refocuses Jessica’s thinking, highlighting acceptance and the need to move forward
• 06:59-08:53 – Crafting and repeating the daily mantra for coping with sadness; Dr. Laura’s insistence on precision and full meaning
• 09:30-10:19 – Conversation on how Jessica’s choices and inner state affect her son, and why authenticity matters

Episode Takeaways

• Grief Over Addiction-Driven Loss is Valid
  Acknowledge sadness and lost dreams, but avoid being emotionally mired by another’s choices.
• Daily Mantra as a Mental Reset
  Accept what’s lost, appreciate what’s good, and consciously choose joy and forward motion each day.
• Model Resilience for Children
  Kids absorb parents’ emotional states. Genuine self-work benefits both parent and child.
• Authenticity is Essential
  You can’t hide your pain from those closest to you. You must do the inner work for real change.

This episode is a clear, practical demonstration of Dr. Laura’s direct, no-nonsense guidance on overcoming grief and regret after leaving an addict, especially when children and deeply held memories are in the mix. The central “mantra” provides a powerful, repeatable tool for anyone struggling to shift from sadness toward hopefulness and action.