Summary of "Change Takes Courage" Episode from Dr. Laura Call of the Day

Podcast Information:

• Title: Dr. Laura Call of the Day
• Host: Dr. Laura Schlessinger
• Episode: Change Takes Courage
• Release Date: May 24, 2025
• Description: Dr. Laura Schlessinger, renowned for her direct and ethical advice, addresses personal and family issues, emphasizing accountability and responsibility.

Introduction

In the episode titled "Change Takes Courage," Dr. Laura Schlessinger engages in a profound conversation with a caller named Corey. Corey seeks guidance on managing his long-term friendship with a close friend battling alcohol and eating disorders. The discussion delves into themes of personal responsibility, boundary setting, and the courage required to initiate meaningful change.

Corey's Background and Issue

Corey begins by sharing his deep-rooted friendship of 35 years with a friend who recently revealed serious struggles with alcoholism and an eating disorder. He expresses his surprise and confusion over not recognizing these issues earlier despite their longstanding relationship.

Corey [00:36]: "Well, I don't know where to start, but I guess I'll give you a little bit of background."

Corey further elaborates that his friend has been a pillar of support for him, especially during tumultuous times, including his marriage to an extreme alcoholic. However, over the past decade, he has observed a gradual decline in her well-being, culminating in serious incidents that prompted him to seek advice.

Dr. Laura's Initial Reaction

Dr. Laura responds with a mix of skepticism and candid feedback, challenging Corey’s self-awareness and ability to recognize the signs of his friend's deteriorating condition.

Dr. Laura [01:14]: "In over three decades, she either didn't have any of these problems or you decided not to see them. How does this work?"

She presses Corey to reflect on his lack of recognition, especially considering his history with traumatic relationships, suggesting that his previous experiences may have blinded him to his friend's issues.

Deeper Exploration of the Relationship Dynamics

Corey admits to a pattern of overlooking significant issues in people’s personalities, indicating a possible enabler role in his friend’s struggles.

Corey [03:04]: "When she blacked out. She didn't know who I was."

Dr. Laura emphasizes the seriousness of the situation, advising immediate medical attention during such critical incidents.

Dr. Laura [03:04]: "Take her to the emergency room when she blacked out."

The conversation shifts to Corey's difficulty in setting boundaries and managing his friend's obsession with food and weight, which dominates their interactions.

Corey [06:52]: "How about this is where. That's where I always have problems with boundaries. Do I do more? Do I do less?"

Dr. Laura's Advice on Setting Boundaries

Dr. Laura advocates for clear and direct communication without judgment or criticism. She encourages Corey to steer conversations away from triggering topics, such as food, to foster healthier interactions.

Dr. Laura [07:26]: "Well, then listen to her talk around food. I mean, what advice are you looking for? You're not going to change her."

Dr. Laura [07:48]: "Well, just say, can we talk about something besides food right now?"

She also reinforces that Corey is not enabling his friend’s behavior, highlighting that her issues would persist regardless of his involvement.

Dr. Laura [08:07]: "And you haven't been enabling her. With or without you. If you were dead yesterday, she'd still be doing her things."

Personal Responsibility and the Need for Change

The conversation takes a pivotal turn as Dr. Laura scrutinizes Corey’s personal growth and commitment to change. She questions the effectiveness of his past therapy and challenges him to take genuine steps towards self-improvement.

Dr. Laura [09:36]: "You need therapy."

Corey acknowledges his stagnation despite previous efforts, realizing the necessity for continued personal development to avoid repeating detrimental patterns in his relationships.

Corey [10:30]: "That is, actually. And that's who I'm fighting against. So that's why I called you to make sure I didn't continue on this road."

Conclusion: Embracing Courage for Change

Dr. Laura concludes by affirming that true change necessitates courage and an openness to transformation. She underscores the importance of seeking ongoing support and being willing to alter one's approach to foster healthier relationships.

Dr. Laura [10:47]: "And this time be more open to change. Change takes courage."

Corey leaves the conversation with a renewed commitment to seek further therapy and adopt a more proactive stance in managing his relationships, recognizing the intricate balance between support and enabling.

Key Takeaways

• Awareness and Recognition: It's crucial to acknowledge and address issues in close relationships rather than remaining oblivious.

• Setting Boundaries: Clear and respectful boundaries help maintain healthy interactions and prevent enabling harmful behaviors.

• Personal Growth: Continuous self-improvement and willingness to change are essential to breaking negative patterns and fostering positive relationships.

• Courage to Change: Embracing change requires bravery and a proactive approach to personal and relational challenges.

This episode serves as a compelling exploration of the complexities involved in supporting loved ones facing addiction and mental health issues while maintaining one's own well-being and personal growth.