Podcast Summary: Dr. Laura Call of the Day – "Grief Has Zapped My Motivation"

Episode Information:

• Title: Grief Has Zapped My Motivation
• Host: Dr. Laura Schlessinger
• Guest: Lance
• Release Date: July 26, 2025
• Platform: SiriusXM Triumph 111

Introduction

In this poignant episode of Dr. Laura Call of the Day, Dr. Laura Schlessinger engages in a heartfelt conversation with Lance, a guest grappling with profound grief following the loss of his long-term partner. Through empathetic dialogue, Dr. Laura offers no-nonsense advice aimed at helping Lance navigate his emotional turmoil and regain his motivation amidst sorrow.

Lance’s Story of Loss

Lance begins by sharing his experience of losing his partner a year and a half ago on Easter Sunday, May 30th. He describes the ongoing struggle with grief, particularly around anniversaries and significant dates that trigger intense emotions.

• Lance [00:27]: “I became a widower about a year and a half ago, actually on Easter Sunday, which was May 30 of last year... when Easter came, I don't know what it was. It just hit me with a ton of bricks.”

He expresses the difficulty in maintaining motivation to perform daily tasks, feeling a complete disconnect despite recognizing his obligations.

Dr. Laura’s Guidance on Grief and Motivation

Dr. Laura acknowledges the normalcy of experiencing heightened emotions around anniversaries of loss.

• Dr. Laura [00:59]: “And ever since was the year anniversary. That's kind of normal.”

She emphasizes the importance of allowing oneself to grieve and redesign life without rushing into new relationships or distractions as a means to cope.

• Dr. Laura [01:48]: “Can you allow yourself to be human? It takes time to redesign a new life. I mean, you didn't plan that at your young age you'd be alone.”

Overcoming the Disconnect: Commitment Over Motivation

A significant portion of the discussion shifts to the concept of motivation versus commitment. Lance admits struggling with motivation, leading Dr. Laura to offer a transformative perspective.

• Lance [02:21]: “My biggest issue right now is I have this complete disconnect... I'm having such a hard time getting motivated to do that.”

Dr. Laura challenges the conventional notion of motivation, advocating instead for honor and commitment as the driving forces behind fulfilling obligations.

• Dr. Laura [02:36]: “I have talked about motivation on the air, and there's no such thing. There's honor and commitment. If you're committed to having to do things, you damn well do them no matter how you feel. So forget about motivation.”

She underscores that actions should stem from a sense of honor rather than fluctuating motivational states.

• Dr. Laura [05:24]: “I don't do everything I'm supposed to do because I'm motivated to do it. Except I am motivated by a desire to be honorable and to follow through on my promises.”

Practical Steps Towards Recovery

Dr. Laura advises Lance to focus on obligations out of a sense of honor and to allow himself the space to engage in activities he enjoys when not bound by responsibilities.

• Dr. Laura [07:40]: “Suffering the loss of somebody who is with you for almost half your life takes quite a while to reconstruct a life. So you just have to stop sitting there counting the minutes, expecting to feel all better. And with respect to things that you're obligated to do, do them because you're an honorable man. If you're not obligated to do them, go do some stuff you'd rather do. Go to the beach.”

This balanced approach encourages honoring commitments while also permitting oneself to find joy and solace in personal activities.

Conclusion

As the conversation wraps up, Lance expresses gratitude for Dr. Laura's insightful advice, highlighting the immediate impact of her guidance on his emotional state.

• Lance [08:08]: “Well, I very much appreciate that. That's kind of what I needed to hear.”

Dr. Laura acknowledges the challenges of grief without offering quick fixes, reinforcing the importance of time and personal integrity in the healing process.

• Dr. Laura [08:34]: “Oh, I wish I had that power. That's somewhere upstairs with my magic wand.”

Key Takeaways

• Honor Over Motivation: Actions should be driven by a sense of honor and commitment rather than transient feelings of motivation.

• Allowing Grief: It’s essential to permit oneself to grieve and take the necessary time to redesign one's life post-loss.

• Balanced Approach: Fulfill obligations out of honor while also engaging in activities that bring personal joy and healing.

• Patience in Healing: Grieving is a process that cannot be rushed; patience and self-compassion are crucial.

Notable Quotes

• Dr. Laura [02:36]: “There’s honor and commitment. If you're committed to having to do things, you damn well do them no matter how you feel.”

• Dr. Laura [05:24]: “I am motivated by a desire to be honorable and to follow through on my promises.”

• Dr. Laura [07:40]: “Do things because you're an honorable man. If you're not obligated to do them, go do some stuff you'd rather do.”

Final Thoughts

This episode serves as a compassionate guide for individuals dealing with grief and the resultant loss of motivation. Dr. Laura Schlessinger’s emphasis on honor and commitment offers a robust framework for listeners to navigate their emotions and responsibilities during challenging times.

Connect with Dr. Laura:

• Phone: 1-800-375-2872
• Facebook: facebook.com/DrLaura
• Instagram: instagram.com/DrLauraprogram