The Dr. Laura Podcast

Episode: I Want to Move On
Date: January 11, 2026
Host: Dr. Laura Schlessinger
Caller: Leslie

Episode Overview

In this emotionally charged episode, Dr. Laura Schlessinger counsels a young woman, Leslie, grappling with the decision to go "no contact" with her abusive and manipulative mother. The conversation delves into issues of family trauma, setting personal boundaries, the challenges of moving on from deep emotional pain, and the complicated feelings of guilt and longing that persist—even in the face of necessary estrangement. Dr. Laura guides Leslie toward tools for healing and empowerment, stressing self-acceptance, the limits of guilt, and even the surprising value of voice coaching as a form of self-therapy.

Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Leslie's Decision to Go No Contact

[02:19–02:32]

• Leslie announces she’s chosen to go no contact with her mother, causing family strife.
• Triggering event: Her mother repeatedly lied about her grandmother’s death or imminent death to manipulate Leslie into visiting.

Dr. Laura: (to Leslie)

"Why was it necessary in your mind to go no contact?"
[02:32]

Family Manipulation and Disregard for Boundaries

[03:14–04:37]

• Leslie shares that her family does not respect her autonomy; her mother tries to control decisions despite Leslie being an adult.
• Leslie attempts to articulate her need for independence:

"She doesn't get to tell me what to do anymore because I'm...I am a young woman."
[03:23]

2. Dr. Laura Challenges and Clarifies “Boundaries”

[04:08–04:37]

• Dr. Laura pushes Leslie to clarify what she means by “boundaries,” hinting at wanting concrete examples over generic language.

Dr. Laura:

"What is a boundary other than for cattle? What are you talking about?"
[03:18]

3. Revealing the Extent of the Abuse

[04:37–06:11]

• Leslie reveals a history of severe abuse:
  • Physical violence
  • Court manipulation and false accusations against her father
  • Verbal abuse and humiliation
  • Emotional volatility, undermining Leslie’s self-esteem
• Dr. Laura observes Leslie’s understated delivery and refocuses:

"It's interesting when people tell a story backwards. What does this have to do with boundaries? She was a vicious nutcase. And you don't want any part of it anymore."
[06:11]

4. The Pain of Estrangement and Wanting to “Move On”

[09:25–10:41]

• Leslie expresses confusion and pain: she misses her mother, wears her jewelry, yet recognizes there was never real love or care.
• Leslie struggles to define what “moving on” would look like, lamenting that she can’t stop thinking about her mother.

Notable Quote:

"If I could move on, she would be a memory and I wouldn't have to think about her. But there's nothing that doesn't make me think or miss or want my mom in my life—even though there honestly wasn't anything loving or caring or anything about her."
Leslie [10:09]

Dr. Laura’s Insight:

"You miss not having a mother. That's what you miss. And you're never going to forget her or everything that happened. Never, ever, ever. Moving on does not include not thinking about her ever."
Dr. Laura [10:41–11:01]

5. Addressing Guilt and the Path to Acceptance

[12:28–13:12]

• Leslie admits guilt about her mother’s declining circumstances and potential loneliness.
• Dr. Laura reframes this:

"Part of you moving on is to let her be with whatever she has created."
[12:48]

6. Therapeutic Tools: Voice Coaching as Emotional Healing

[11:01–13:30]

• Dr. Laura proposes voice lessons to help Leslie stop “sounding like a whiny victim,” suggesting that projecting her voice properly can alter her mindset and emotional state.
• Dr. Laura shares her professional experience:

"I've worked with voice coaches who help people who have emotional difficulties. And I've seen how people are uplifted when they change how they project their voice."
[11:02–11:52]

• Leslie enthusiastically accepts the advice, ending the call on a note of actionable hope.

Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• On Boundaries and Abuse:

  "She was a vicious nutcase... and it's self defense to stay away from her."
  Dr. Laura [06:11]

• On the permanence of emotional shadow:

  "You're never going to forget it and it's going to have an impact. And moving on means you accept that that was your life. You're probably damaged somewhat from it. However, you're going to make good decisions in spite of the pain. That's how you move on."
  Dr. Laura [11:53]

• On Responsibility and Guilt:

  "Is to let her be with whatever she has created."
  Dr. Laura [12:48]

• Empowerment through Action:

  "See a voice coach...and you can start sounding like a woman who has moved on."
  Dr. Laura [13:12]

Timestamps for Important Segments

• Leslie’s Introduction and Family Background: [01:57–04:37]
• Disclosure of Abuse: [04:37–06:11]
• Clarifying Leslie’s Hurt and Desire to Move On: [09:25–10:41]
• Dr. Laura on Acceptance and Moving Forward: [11:01–11:53]
• Discussion of Guilt and Letting Go: [12:28–12:48]
• Voice Coaching as Therapeutic Tool: [11:01–13:30]

Episode Takeaways

• Estrangement is sometimes a healthy, self-protective response to abuse.
• The longing after going “no contact” often stems from mourning the motherly love that was never received—not missing the real, abusive person.
• “Moving on” does not mean erasing memory or grief; it means accepting the past and making conscious choices for a better future.
• Accepting the limits of one’s responsibility for a harmful parent is a crucial part of personal healing.
• Physical changes—in this case, voice and posture through coaching—can significantly influence emotional healing and self-perception.

Dr. Laura’s advice is direct, sometimes tough, but grounded in compassionate realism: acceptance, self-care, and the pursuit of empowerment—even through unconventional means like voice training. Listeners are left with both a sobering perspective on family trauma and actionable steps toward genuine healing.