Masturbation is GOOD for You!

Summary

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Podcast Summary: The Dr. Laura Podcast

Episode: Masturbation is GOOD for You!
Host: Dr. Laura Schlessinger
Date: November 24, 2025

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Overview

In this engaging and direct episode, Dr. Laura Schlessinger addresses a letter from a concerned mother about her adult daughter’s reaction after walking in on her boyfriend masturbating. The episode uses this scenario to launch into an in-depth discussion about masturbation: its place in healthy sexual development, common misconceptions, medical and psychological benefits, and how unhealthy attitudes toward it can damage relationships. Dr. Laura melds her frank style with research-based insights to debunk myths and encourage listeners to cultivate healthier attitudes around sexuality.

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. The Listener’s Letter and Situation

• A mother emails Dr. Laura about her daughter, who felt “angry, hurt and betrayed” after catching her boyfriend masturbating.
• The daughter’s sensitivity comes from prior negative relationship experiences; she communicated this to her boyfriend as a boundary.
• The boyfriend initially tried to hide the act, then admitted and apologized, but the daughter felt her trust was broken.
• Dr. Laura is openly critical of both the daughter’s and mother’s reactions:
  • “She cannot masturbate because I had some problems with my psyche, with my sexuality… I hope he dumps her. Seriously, he’s got to dump her and move out.” (03:45)
  • “…if you’re telling her she’s a poor thing, you’re not supporting her.” (04:40)

2. Masturbation: A Psychological and Physiological Perspective

• Masturbation is described as both “normal” and “healthy” for sexual development for people of all ages and relationship statuses.
  • “Masturbation has many, many, many documented health benefits, for example… reduces stress, improves sleep, eases pain, etc. It’s a healthy thing to do as long as it doesn’t become compulsive.” (08:13)
• Dr. Laura likens excessive masturbation to compulsive eating—healthy in moderation, disordered when it becomes compulsive.
  • “Eating is a very important healthy part of living. If you eat compulsively, you just made eating a disorder. If you masturbate compulsively, you just made masturbation a disorder when it wasn’t.” (08:34)

3. Scientific Benefits of Masturbation

• Health benefits listed include: reduced stress, improved sleep, boosted mood, increased focus, and pain relief.
  • “Studies have shown that masturbation reduces stress, relieves tension, improves sleep, increases your focus… alleviates aches and pain, enhances your sex life and prevents anxiety and depression. And you can’t get pregnant.” (09:45)
• For males: frequent ejaculation is correlated with lower prostate cancer risk.
  • “One study demonstrated that males who ejaculate frequently have a lower risk of prostate cancer.” (10:38)
• For females: masturbation enhances orgasm likelihood during partnered sex, offers relief for menstrual cramps and helps with vaginal dryness in older women.
  • “Females who masturbate are more likely to have an orgasm during sexual relationships… helps you with vaginal dryness and decreased pain during sexual intercourse because use it or lose it babes.” (11:50)
  • “Married females who masturbate have more orgasms. Higher self-esteem … greater satisfaction with their marriage and their sex life.” (12:29)

4. Debunking Myths and Culture-Based Guilt

• Dr. Laura forcefully dismisses outdated and unscientific claims about masturbation (e.g. blindness, hair on palms, infertility).
  • “You will not become mentally ill. Your penis will not shrink or curve. You will not decrease your sperm count… None of that is a side effect of masturbation.” (13:10)
• Emphasizes she is speaking as a psychotherapist, physiologist, and biologist, not as a religious authority.
  • “Don’t bother calling or writing if you think it’s a sin. I’m not dealing with your religious rules.” (14:48)

5. Relationship Dynamics and Advice

• Overt pathologizing of masturbation in relationships is harmful.
  • “Tell her to get help. She has [the] mistaken notion that this is a direct attack on her and women who think that destroy their relationships and spend a lot of time being miserable and talk about betrayal trust.” (15:06)
• Dr. Laura argues that walking in on a partner’s private act should be met with discretion and respect for privacy.
  • “She should have gone, ‘oops, sorry,’ and closed the door.” (15:34)
• Advice to the mother: urge her daughter to seek therapy or call into the show before jeopardizing a potentially “perfectly good guy.”

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Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• On forming boundaries based on past issues:
  • “You cannot masturbate because I had some problems with my psyche, with my sexuality and with an ex… I hope he dumps her. Seriously, he’s got to dump her and move out.” (03:45)
• On compulsive vs. healthy behavior:
  • “If you masturbate compulsively, you just made masturbation a disorder when it wasn’t.” (08:34)
• On relationship trust and privacy:
  • “She should have gone, ‘oops, sorry,’ and closed the door.” (15:34)
• On stigmatizing masturbation:
  • “Don’t bother calling or writing if you think it’s a sin. I’m not dealing with your religious rules. I’m here as a psychotherapist, a physiologist, a biologist.” (14:48)
• On boosting self-esteem:
  • “I have low self-esteem. Masturbate. I’m going to start telling people that. You have low self-esteem? Hang up and go masturbate. Call me back.” (12:50)

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Timestamps for Key Segments

• Letter & Initial Commentary: 00:28 – 05:53
• The Science and Psychology of Masturbation: 08:13 – 13:10
• Benefits by Gender: 10:38 – 12:29
• Debunking Myths: 13:10 – 14:48
• Relationship Advice & Final Thoughts: 15:06 – 15:50

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Conclusion

Dr. Laura delivers a candid, science-backed endorsement of masturbation as a normal, healthy aspect of sexual well-being and development. She cautions against pathologizing or moralizing it, especially within relationships, and urges her listeners—and the letter-writer’s daughter—to embrace self-knowledge, seek help for sexual hang-ups, and respect personal privacy. Her characteristic blend of blunt advice, humor, and scientific authority make this episode both educational and thought-provoking for anyone grappling with related concerns.

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Transcript

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[Dr. Laura Schlessinger]

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[Dr. Laura Schlessinger]

Masturbation Normal, healthy part of your sexual development. You can be using your hands, toys, whatever to stimulate your genitals. Masturbation has many, many, many documented health benefits, for example, and I will get to more of them as I develop this subject with you. Reduces stress, improves sleep, ease pain, etc. It's a healthy thing to do as long as it doesn't become compulsive. Anything becoming compulsive is bad. Eating is a very important healthy part of living. If you eat compulsively, you just made eating a disorder. If you masturbate compulsively, you just made masturbation a disorder when it wasn't. Masturbation is not a disorder. People masturbate by themselves. They masturbate each other in sexual relationships. Single people masturbate. People in sexual Relationships. Masturbate a normal part of our sexual being except when it is compulsive. And instead of interactional human with your spouse. Sexual activity. Okay. Studies have shown that masturbation reduces stress, relieves tension, improves sleep, increases your focus. Maybe not at the moment. Boost your mood, alleviate aches and pain, enhance your sex life and prevent anxiety and depression. And you can't get pregnant. Typically you can't get a sexually transmitted infection unless your hands and tools are not clean. When you have an orgasm, your body releases certain hormones. As I've told you in the past. Dopamine, oxytocin, feel good hormones. They increase positive emotions such as happiness. They counteract a hormone in your body called cortisol. Cortisol is bad. It's the stress hormone. I had a bunch of that yesterday. Male masturbation beneficial for long term health. One study demonstrated that males who ejaculate frequently have a lower risk of prostate cancer. Ejaculating often can prevent the buildup of cancer causing agents in the prostate gland. But where it really is marvelous is with women. Females who masturbate are more likely to have an orgasm during sexual relationships with their husbands because they know the feelings. They know how to get with the feeling. They know how to get with the build up. They know the feelings that imply, ooh, an orgasm is coming.

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[Dr. Laura Schlessinger]

Female masturbation can also help provide relief with your menstrual cramps. When you're an older person, no idea what age that is. Masturbation helps you with vaginal dryness and decreased pain during sexual intercourse because use it are lucid babes. According to one particular study, married females who masturbate have more orgasms. Higher self esteem. Yeah, you get your high, you want to pump up your self esteem. Masturbate. I have low self esteem. Masturbate. I'm going to start telling people that you have low self esteem. Hang up and go masturbate. Call me back. Increase sexual desire. Oh yeah. The more you enjoy those feelings, the more you wish to enjoy those feelings. So married females who masturbate greater satisfaction with their marriage and their sex life. Okay, you've all heard that there are bad, bad side effects to masturbation. It's a lie. Doesn't cause you to lose your eyesight. Your palms will not get hairy. You will not become mentally ill. Your penis will not shrink or curve. You will not decrease your sperm count. You will not have erectile dysfunction. You will not have a lower sex drive. These are all nonsense. You will not experience infertility. None of that is a side effect of masturbation. Now to get back to eating is good, compulsive eating is bad, masturbation is good, compulsive masturbation becomes an illness. So if you're not going to work, you're canceling plans, you're forgetting responsibilities, you're spending too much time doing this. You watching porn and masturbating for hours on end. This is a mental illness. And if you're watching porn and masturbating for hours on end instead of having sex with your beloved, making love to your beloved, that's an illness. Otherwise, if you're too rough with yourself, you can hurt yourself. I mean, you can masturbate till you get raw. That's a problem. But I'm talking about regular old fashioned masturbation is a healthy part of of your humanity. Now don't bother calling a writing if you think it's a sin. I'm not dealing with your religious rules. I'm here as a psychotherapist, a physiologist, a biologist. Okay, so getting back to the mother whose daughter walked in on her boyfriend she's shacking up with who was masturbating. Tell her to get help. She has mistaken notion that this is a direct attack on her and women who think that destroy their relationships and spend a lot of time being miserable and talk about betrayal trust. Of course he lied about it. She walked in on him. She should have gone oops, sorry and closed the door. So Laurie, tell your daughter to call me before she loses what may be a perfectly good guy. Just saying my number. 1-800-375-2872. If you like this podcast, be sure to rate it on Apple podcasts or your favorite place to listen to my podcast. Of course, I'd love if you gave me five stars. And be sure to share this podcast with a friend on Facebook or your preferred social media platform.

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