Michelle Can't Handle the Truth

Summary

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The Dr. Laura Podcast

Episode: Michelle Can't Handle the Truth
Host: Dr. Laura Schlessinger
Date: March 2, 2026

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Episode Overview

In this emotionally charged episode, Dr. Laura takes a call from Michelle, a grieving dog owner struggling with the loss of her pet. The conversation delves into the nature of grief, the importance of confronting painful truths, and Dr. Laura’s often direct approach to helping callers process emotional pain. The discussion is candid, at times confrontational, and ultimately geared toward moving Michelle—and the audience—past unhealthy patterns of melodrama and avoidance, toward acceptance and healthy grieving.

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Michelle’s Grief and the Loss of Her Dog (01:33–04:56)

• Michelle’s Story: Michelle shares the recent loss of her first dog to cancer. She describes going to great lengths for treatment, ultimately losing the dog after a ten-year bond.
• Feelings of Guilt and Sadness: Michelle expresses concern about triggering sadness in others and her difficulty moving on.
  • "I don't just want to make other people sad." – Michelle (03:25)
• Dr. Laura’s Immediate Response: Dr. Laura dismisses the idea of 'trigger warnings' and urges Michelle not to worry about upsetting others.

2. Debating “Moving On” and Emotional Melodrama (04:02–05:47)

• Defining ‘Moving On’: Dr. Laura reframes the concept of moving on—not as no longer feeling pain, but as continuing daily life amid the grief.
  • "Moving on does not include ripping it out of your head... You did it the next morning when you woke up." – Dr. Laura (04:07–04:56)
• Warning Against Melodrama: Dr. Laura challenges Michelle’s statements about never wanting to leave the house, cautioning against dramatizing grief in ways that could harm herself or her relationships.
  • "Don't play games like that. Don't get melodramatic. It's very destructive to everybody else in your life who now finds out the only thing that matters to you is a dog." – Dr. Laura (05:32–05:47)

3. Pattern of Emotional Avoidance and Reality Acceptance (09:12–17:32)

• Repeated Calls for Confronting Reality: Dr. Laura zeroes in on Michelle’s difficulty vocalizing, “He’s dead,” insisting that facing this truth is essential for healing.
  • "Can you just say he's dead? Say it. Say it, please. Please, say it. You need to do it." – Dr. Laura (15:32–16:55)
• Insight Into Michelle’s Coping Style: Dr. Laura suggests Michelle’s response is part of a lifelong “melodramatic pattern” and not just a reaction to the dog’s death.
  • "I consider the melodrama that you’re displaying to be more of a lifelong pattern... This is your personality and how you deal with life and tragedy." – Dr. Laura (10:05–10:30)
• Recommendation for Deeper Help: Dr. Laura encourages therapy for ongoing patterns of emotional response that go beyond normal grief.

4. How to Grieve and Move Forward (11:09–14:58)

• Comparison to Other Losses: Dr. Laura compares pet loss to other life disappointments, teaching that pain is a natural but not all-consuming part of loss.
  • "We get over it like we get over everything else... We have disappointments all the time." – Dr. Laura (11:09–11:27)
• Honoring the Relationship—Not the Drama: Dr. Laura underscores that missing the dog is a sign of love, but excessive dramatization is not healthy or respectful of the loss.
  • "Missing your dog means you had a nice bond with your dog. But to go through this melodrama is not to honor your dog, it’s to sound nuts." – Dr. Laura (12:25–13:57)
• Crying as a Healing Release: Dr. Laura validates having a “good cry” and explains its benefits.
  • "It's okay to sob. Just sob, Michelle. Just sob a few times. Maybe more than a few. Sob. Trust me, it's good for you and your lacrimal glands. And it changes hormones in your brain." – Dr. Laura (14:20–14:41)

5. Embracing the Truth and Final Encouragement (15:32–17:47)

• Confronting Avoidance: Dr. Laura insists that Michelle say, “He’s dead,” multiple times to reduce avoidance and anchor herself in reality.
• Transition from Melodrama to Humanity: The conversation shifts from combative to supportive once Michelle can calmly state the truth and is allowed to grieve without judgment.
  • "You're not being melodramatic right now. You're being human." – Dr. Laura (17:26–17:32)
  • "Consider yourself hugged. Now hang up and go cry." – Dr. Laura (17:37–17:47)

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Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• On the Nature of Grief:
  • "Moving on does not include ripping it out of your head." – Dr. Laura (04:07)
  • "Missing your dog means you had a nice bond with your dog." – Dr. Laura (12:25)
• Direct Challenges:
  • "Cut the melodrama. It's absurd. Shows very little maturity or an emotional maturity. This is a hurt. That's it. It isn't the end of your life. It isn't the end of the world." – Dr. Laura (12:25–12:45)
• On Facing Reality:
  • "We can't avoid life. It doesn't solve anything. Avoiding it doesn't make a change. It doesn't make it be different, and it doesn't give us the opportunity to flow with it. If we fight something off, we're not flowing with it, and we must." – Dr. Laura (16:24–16:41)
• Humanizing Grief:
  • "It's okay to sob. Just sob, Michelle... It's very releasing to have a good cry instead of sounding like a nutcase." – Dr. Laura (14:20–14:41)
• Empathetic Closure:
  • "Consider yourself hugged. Now hang up and go cry." – Dr. Laura (17:37–17:47)

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Timestamps for Important Segments

• Michelle Introduces Loss: 01:33–03:43
• Dr. Laura Sets Tone on Grief: 04:07–05:47
• Challenge to Melodrama/Reality Confrontation: 10:04–12:45 / 15:32–17:11
• Coping Strategies and Advice: 11:09–14:58
• Emotional Turning Point: 16:55–17:32

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Tone & Style

Dr. Laura maintains her signature no-nonsense, direct style throughout the call, occasionally abrasive but rooted in a desire to push the caller toward psychological health and away from unhealthy patterns. The podcast episode is raw, filled with tough love, and ultimately lands on a note of empathy and encouragement for honest, non-dramatic grieving.

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Transcript

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[Dr. Laura Schlessinger]

listening to my call of the day sponsored by Vibriant Super C Serum, my personal solution for smoother, more hydrated skin. Super C Serum is a full line of skin care products all in one bottle. Get 37% off plus free shipping by going to vibrance.com DrLora Remember, you can hear my radio program daily on SiriusXM Triumph and connect with me 24 [e-mail] Michelle welcome to the program, Dr. Laura.

[Michelle (Caller)]

Thank you so much for taking my call. You're welcome. I found you like I was. I don't know, I found you a few months ago and if I knew that you're around forever, man, I wish. Wish I found you before because I would have made different decisions in my life. But you're amazing. I'm so glad I found you and I can, you know, be at a pet, be a better person for it now.

[Dr. Laura Schlessinger]

Oh, thank you. What's going on?

[Michelle (Caller)]

This is tough. I'm sorry.

[Dr. Laura Schlessinger]

Go ahead.

[Michelle (Caller)]

Okay.

[Dr. Laura Schlessinger]

Go ahead.

[Michelle (Caller)]

Okay. I don't know where to start. At the beginning or the end or I don't even know where to start, but I'm.

[Dr. Laura Schlessinger]

Start in the middle and work your way out sideways simultaneously.

[Michelle (Caller)]

Okay. A month ago, we had to say goodbye to our pup.

[Dr. Laura Schlessinger]

A puppy.

[Michelle (Caller)]

50? Yes, our dog. Our dog. He was 10.

[Dr. Laura Schlessinger]

And why did we have to say goodbye? What happened?

[Michelle (Caller)]

We tried the best we could. In October, we found out that he had cancer, you know, and we were like, whatever it takes. Not like money matters, but it was like anything you know, whatever we can do. And, you know, $15,000 later, two months later, and it just didn't, like, worked for a while, and then it didn't. So we had someone to come to our home. It was peaceful. And I feel so bad because I know your listeners. I don't want to trigger anyone, but

[Dr. Laura Schlessinger]

I don't believe in the triggering crap, so don't worry about that, please. That's just crap.

[Michelle (Caller)]

I don't just want to make other people sad.

[Dr. Laura Schlessinger]

Of course they're going to be sad if they remind themselves of the loss of their dog. What's bad about that? What's bad about. Oh, please. Oh, my God. Okay, you've been reasonably brainwashed. Go ahead.

[Michelle (Caller)]

Okay. So I don't know. Is my first pup. He chose me. You know, the whole thing. Like, I didn't.

[Dr. Laura Schlessinger]

Are you calling because you feel bad that your dog has passed?

[Michelle (Caller)]

I just don't know how to move on.

[Dr. Laura Schlessinger]

You already moved on.

[Michelle (Caller)]

Like you. No, I haven't.

[Dr. Laura Schlessinger]

You've already moved on. Yes, you have. You've done different things every day. You've made phone calls, you've seen friends, you've taken care of some work, you've cooked, you've gone to the grocery. That's all moving on. Moving on does not include ripping it out of your head. I think a lot of people think moving on means I don't feel bad anymore. I feel totally fine. That's moving on. Of course it's not moving on. You did the next morning when you woke up. You did it when you took showers and brushed your teeth. That's all Moving on. That you miss your dog. I hope so. After 10 years, be terrible if you didn't miss your dog,

[Michelle (Caller)]

right? Partly. I'm never leaving my house again. I mean, not in my house, but.

[Dr. Laura Schlessinger]

Do you want me to have to call somebody because you decided you don't want to live because your dog is not living? You want me to have to call somebody to deal with that with you? Because I will. If you're going to say things like that. There will be action to protect you from yourself. Is that what you want? Is that what you're suggesting to me?

[Michelle (Caller)]

No.

[Dr. Laura Schlessinger]

Then don't play games.

[Michelle (Caller)]

I do have children.

[Dr. Laura Schlessinger]

Take care of. Don't play games like that. Don't get melodramatic. It's very destructive to everybody else in your life who now finds out the only thing that matters to you is a dog. They don't. I don't believe that's the message you want to give anybody in your life who cares about you. So you're going to have to cut the melodrama. O o Ozempic hi, I'm Maria, salon owner. You know the jingle now discover the facts about Ozempic, a GLP one. There's only one FDA approved Ozempic made by Novo Nordisk.

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[Dr. Laura Schlessinger]

Got it?

[Michelle (Caller)]

Yes. But do you have advice of what I can. Like, I swear I'm not being melodramatic. It's just.

[Dr. Laura Schlessinger]

Yes, you were a moment ago. You were. Cut it. Don't do it again because I will have to call somebody because I worry about your well being.

[Michelle (Caller)]

I'm fine. I mean,

[Dr. Laura Schlessinger]

I just don't want to leave the house again. That kind of ideation.

[Michelle (Caller)]

Like, I won't move because my dog was here. And like, I want to move because

[Dr. Laura Schlessinger]

your dog is in your heart and

[Michelle (Caller)]

your dog is in doggy again.

[Dr. Laura Schlessinger]

Okay. Okay. Michelle, I'm. I am unable to be of use to you. You're prone to melodrama.

[Michelle (Caller)]

I don't want to be.

[Dr. Laura Schlessinger]

And I consider melodrama that you're displaying to be a more of a lifelong pattern. Therefore, it's not a reaction to the dog dying. This is your personality and how you deal with life and tragedy. In which case, in a radio program, I'm not going to be able to make a dent in that. Other to say, then you may want to participate in some serious, ongoing, in depth psychotherapy to deal with these ideas. Have you said everything you're going to say? Because this is a radio program and they need sound.

[Michelle (Caller)]

Yes. I just don't know how to get over the death of a dog. Because it's my first dog. That's all.

[Dr. Laura Schlessinger]

We get over it like we get over everything else. Disappointment when we applied to a college and didn't get in. Disappointment when we had a crush on somebody and they liked somebody else. Disappointment when we thought we could win in the Powerball thing. We have disappointments all the time.

[Michelle (Caller)]

And you've survived them all so much easier though.

[Dr. Laura Schlessinger]

You have survived them all. Cut the melodrama. You've gotten away with this melodrama. You get people to really suck up to being sympathetic. This is quite a thing you do. I'm impressed.

[Michelle (Caller)]

No, that's so not true.

[Dr. Laura Schlessinger]

You're good at it. Oh, yeah.

[Michelle (Caller)]

I never. I didn't post on Facebook. I didn't.

[Dr. Laura Schlessinger]

Never didn't post on Facebook. What does that have to do with.

[Michelle (Caller)]

I didn't like. This isn't something that I, in China tell the whole world. Okay.

[Dr. Laura Schlessinger]

The melodramatic things you're expressing that are coming from your head worry me about your well being.

[Michelle (Caller)]

Can you tell me what I should do then?

[Dr. Laura Schlessinger]

About what?

[Michelle (Caller)]

To maybe not be so melodramatic. I don't know.

[Dr. Laura Schlessinger]

Yeah. Cut it. Stop doing it. Stop saying these atrocious things. No, I didn't say to do that. Listen carefully and don't put words in my mouth. I said cut the melodrama. It's absurd. Shows very little maturity or an emotional maturity. This is a hurt. That's it. It isn't the end of your life. It isn't the end of the world. You have friends, you have family. You have hobbies, you have work. You have this, you have that. You have the other thing. This is a disappointment and a sad loss. A few years ago, I lost a dog, too. I know what it feels like. And you carry on with your life and eventually you just miss them, which is nice because missing somebody means they were important. If you don't miss somebody, it means you really didn't give a damn. So missing your dog means you had a nice bond with your dog. But to go through this melodrama is not to honor your dog, it's to sound nuts. You have any children?

[Michelle (Caller)]

Yes, I have three.

[Dr. Laura Schlessinger]

And what would you do if they. You heard them calling me, saying, I don't want to live. I don't want to go on. I'm never going to be happy again. I don't want to connect with anybody. I don't want to connect with my mother. I don't want to do anything. I don't want to go to school. What would that be like for you if you heard your kid do that?

[Michelle (Caller)]

I understand.

[Dr. Laura Schlessinger]

It's okay to sob. Just sob, Michelle. Just sob a few times. Maybe more than a few. Sob. Trust me, it's good for you and your lacrimal glands. And it changes hormones in your brain. It's very releasing to have a good cry instead of sounding like a nutcase. A good cry. Let it out. All right. Tell me two of the cute things this dog did.

[Michelle (Caller)]

He was the best. I don't know.

[Dr. Laura Schlessinger]

I don't want to hear he was the best. He wasn't. No dog is the best. Except to the owner.

[Michelle (Caller)]

We came home. Just tell me.

[Dr. Laura Schlessinger]

The cuting came home like every dog does. That what was unique about your dog? Shush. Every dog is excited when we come home. Tell me what was unique to your dog. What was cute about your dog when

[Michelle (Caller)]

we brought him home? See, this is the shit that makes me sad. Sorry.

[Dr. Laura Schlessinger]

So it makes you sad. It's fine to be sad. He's dead. Can you just say he's dead? Say it. Say it, please. Please, say it. You need to do.

[Michelle (Caller)]

When we brought him to home from New Jersey, from Manhattan, it was the first time that he stepped on grass. And we got.

[Dr. Laura Schlessinger]

I need you to say running. Stop avoiding it. Stop avoiding it.

[Michelle (Caller)]

Why?

[Dr. Laura Schlessinger]

Because we can't avoid life. It doesn't solve anything. Avoiding it doesn't make a change. It doesn't make it be different, and it doesn't give us the opportunity to flow with it. If we fight something off, we're not flowing with it, and we must. He's dead. Say it, Please. Here's your deal. Say he's dead, or hang up on me.

[Michelle (Caller)]

He's dead.

[Dr. Laura Schlessinger]

One more time. One more time. Come on, you can do it. One more time.

[Michelle (Caller)]

He's dead.

[Dr. Laura Schlessinger]

That's right. And if you feel like crying, go right ahead.

[Michelle (Caller)]

Thank you. I don't want to be melodramatic. It just hurts.

[Dr. Laura Schlessinger]

You're not. You're not being melodramatic right now. You're being human.

[Michelle (Caller)]

Okay. Thank you.

[Dr. Laura Schlessinger]

You're welcome. Consider yourself hugged. Now hang up and go cry.

[Michelle (Caller)]

Thank you.

[Dr. Laura Schlessinger]

You're welcome. My number, 1-800-375-2872. If you like this podcast, be sure to rate it on Apple podcasts or your favorite place to listen to my podcast. Of course, I'd love if you gave me five stars. And be sure to share this podcast with a friend on Facebook or your preferred social media platform.

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