Bethany (2:18)

Okay, well then I if you're that.

Dr. Laura (2:22)

Suspicious and that insecure, you cannot have a loving relationship, in my opinion.

Bethany (2:28)

Okay, can I switch subjects to one more question? Yeah, go ahead. So I have been married eight years and long story short, found out that the diamond that my husband had bought for me in my engagement ring was a Cubic zirconia. And I, I would not care if he was a poor person. Right. Or in school or whatever the situation was, but this man owns several very expensive watches and knows how to buy jewelry and find things. Right. And. And said it was a real diamond the whole time. And, you know, when I approached, I just don't know, like, what? Yeah, he just seemed nonchalant about it when I was like, oh, my gosh. I went to the jewelry store to get it redipped and they said it's not a real diamond. Do you think maybe a previous jeweler that we had brought it to swapped it out or should we make an insurance claim? And he just was like, oh, I guess I bought the wrong stone and was not, you know, I don't know. I just feel like, to me, that makes me feel like he didn't love me enough to buy anything more expensive than a $20 cubic zirconia. Should I feel that way or not?

Dr. Laura (3:40)

What do you think?

Bethany (3:43)

Yes.

Dr. Laura (3:45)

Do you have any kids with him?

Bethany (3:48)

Yes. One.

Dr. Laura (3:49)

How old is, how old is your one kid?

Bethany (3:53)

Seven years old.

Dr. Laura (3:55)

Okay. You have 11 years to keep married.

Bethany (4:02)

Yeah.

Dr. Laura (4:02)

Without ruining your kid's life. Yeah. You're. Yeah. You know what kind of a man you're married to. This isn't the only. This isn't the only point that you could indicate something about his character. So. Yeah, I don't know if he can love he.

Bethany (4:22)

Right.

Dr. Laura (4:24)

Yeah. You want to give me some other instances that lead you to believe he's not a man of sincerity, depth in character? Give me some other qualities of him, some other things he's done.

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Dr. Laura (5:09)

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Bethany (7:58)

I am sure there are some I did kind of tell him like you know you here.

Dr. Laura (8:04)

No, I'm asking you. I'm asking ma'am, I asked you a question. Please respond to it. I asked you to tell me because you nodded in the affirmative when I said I'm sure there are other things you could point out.

Dr. Laura (8:17)

Like this.

Dr. Laura (8:18)

You said, yes, I'd like to Know what they are. Please.

Bethany (8:24)

There's. I honestly can't think of something like write off, like a specific thing other than. I just. I got your book.

Dr. Laura (8:33)

Then why did you nod in affirmative that this is a characteristic of him? It either is or it is not.

Bethany (8:42)

What he's doing is in your book. You make it seem like the woman needs to respect the man because he's out there.

Dr. Laura (8:50)

I asked you a question. Why won't you answer it?

Bethany (8:56)

I'm getting to the answer.

Dr. Laura (8:58)

No, you're not. No, you're not. I need you to get to it directly, not indirectly. Don't tell me about respect and all of that. He gave you a phony diamond. He buys himself things. That's not the only stuff he does. Which leads you, I guess.

Bethany (9:13)

Yeah.

Dr. Laura (9:15)

Well, I'm sorry.

Dr. Laura (9:17)

I'm sorry. Did he replace the ring?

Bethany (9:22)

Not yet. I told him, you know, by like the New Year, like, because I thought maybe for Christmas he'll get me a new diamond. And I. I did what your book said and not beat around the bush and not hint, just tell him what I want. But I said I want you to get me. Okay, A new diamond. And so we'll see what happens.

Dr. Laura (9:42)

Good luck with that.

Dr. Laura (9:44)

You know?

Bethany (9:44)

Good luck with that. Okay. Well, that's all I had for you.

Dr. Laura (9:50)

His reaction tells you he knew and he didn't care. He didn't want to spend the money.

Bethany (9:55)

Right.

Dr. Laura (9:57)

So do you see that? He's cheap in other ways.

Bethany (10:02)

Not on himself.

Dr. Laura (10:05)

Why are you laughing? Do you realize what you're trapped in? Why are you laughing?

Bethany (10:11)

Yeah.

Dr. Laura (10:14)

You'Re trapped with another decade living with a man who doesn't love you or anybody else. Just himself. But these guys are so charming. This is not funny. And don't expect a ring for Christmas. And don't be disappointed when it doesn't come. Realize you're going to make the best of the next 11 years.

Bethany (10:40)

Right? When I read your book and it said don't complain about the animal you brought home, I kind of rationalized it in that Johnny, my. I shouldn't have said his name, but my spouse. Hopefully he's not listening, but that he. He's just an. Like, this is the animal I brought home. He's not romantic and just deal with it. Right? And don't complain about it. But this, you think is deeper than that. Like a. You know, he's like, I'm forcing him to be something he's not. By making him buy a diamond.

Dr. Laura (11:20)

You're not. You're not going to force him to be anything. He's stronger than your will. And stop freaking laughing. It's serious.

Bethany (11:31)

Okay, you're right.

Dr. Laura (11:35)

And I suggest for your own being that you have a savings account and you put your extra that's not spent on clothes and food and the kid and all that stuff. Just keep amassing an account just in case he's not going to pay for your kid to go to school. I mean, you're going to have to plan ahead to think how you can take care of yourself and your kid if he continues to be in this vein. So the giggling stops, the planning does, the cutesy bit is over. Bethany.

Bethany (12:13)

Okay, you're right. Thank you.

Dr. Laura (12:17)

You're very welcome. My number 1-800-375-2872. What hill do you Are you willing or not willing to die? That's an interesting question. All right. My number 1-800-375-2872.

Dr. Laura (12:40)

If you like this podcast, be sure to rate it on Apple Podcasts or your favorite place to listen to my podcast. Of course, I'd love if you gave me five stars. And be sure to share this podcast with a friend on Facebook or your preferred social media platform.

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