Some People Deserve to Be Ghosted

Summary

Podcast Summary: Dr. Laura Call of the Day

Episode Title: Some People Deserve to Be Ghosted
Release Date: April 4, 2025
Host: Dr. Laura Schlessinger
Platform: SiriusXM Triumph 111

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Introduction

In this episode of Dr. Laura Call of the Day, Dr. Laura Schlessinger addresses a poignant issue faced by many young individuals navigating the complexities of friendships and social dynamics. The episode, titled "Some People Deserve to Be Ghosted," delves into the challenges of toxic friendships, the importance of personal boundaries, and the empowering decision to distance oneself from harmful relationships.

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Summary of the Call

Callers:

• Stacy (20 years old)
• Ava (15 years old)

Stacy, a 20-year-old sister, and Ava, her 15-year-old sister, reach out to Dr. Laura seeking advice regarding Ava's tumultuous friendships. Ava is a freshman in high school, balancing academics, sports, and her own business—a testament to her industrious and motivated nature. However, Ava finds herself entangled with two friends who are also sisters, aged 15 and 18. These friends, who are homeschooled and have ample free time, inundate Ava with constant messages and social media interactions, leading to Ava feeling overwhelmed and stressed.

When Ava politely requested a slowdown in communication to better manage her time, her friends reacted negatively, accusing her of prioritizing her business over their relationship and expressing hurt feelings. This confrontation escalated to the point where Ava found herself crying during a phone call that her friends' mother overheard, intensifying the emotional strain. Despite recognizing red flags such as guilt-tripping and love bombing, Ava fears losing her only friends, prompting her and Stacy to seek Dr. Laura's guidance.

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Key Points and Discussions

1. Understanding Toxic Friendships:

   • Dr. Laura emphasizes recognizing the signs of toxic friendships, such as manipulation, guilt-tripping, and unnecessary emotional drama. She underscores that true friends support each other's growth and respect personal boundaries.

2. The Importance of Personal Boundaries:

   • Setting clear boundaries is crucial for maintaining mental and emotional well-being. Dr. Laura advises Ava to assert her need for space without feeling guilty, highlighting that it's essential to prioritize one's own health and responsibilities.

3. Empowerment Through Decision-Making:

   • Dr. Laura encourages Ava to take control of her social interactions by distancing herself from friends who do not respect her boundaries. She reinforces that ghosting, when done thoughtfully, can be a valid method to end unhealthy relationships without engaging in prolonged conflict.

4. Resilience and Building New Connections:

   • While difficult, distancing from toxic friends opens the door to forming healthier, more supportive relationships. Dr. Laura advises Ava to seek out friends who appreciate her ambitions and contribute positively to her life.

5. The Role of Family Support:

   • Stacy's involvement exemplifies the importance of family support in navigating challenging social situations. Dr. Laura acknowledges and appreciates Stacy's role in advocating for Ava's well-being.

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Insights and Conclusions

Dr. Laura Schlessinger provides a compassionate yet firm response to Ava's predicament, empowering her to prioritize her well-being over maintaining harmful friendships. The conversation highlights the necessity of recognizing toxic behavior, setting boundaries, and not being afraid to distance oneself from those who do not support personal growth. Dr. Laura’s advice serves as a reminder that self-respect and mental health should always take precedence over external pressures to maintain relationships that are detrimental.

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Notable Quotes

• Dr. Laura on Jealousy and Manipulation:
  "[05:37] Dr. Laura: Anybody who could be that mean with an adult around, block them from your phone. And I mean that and this nonsense. If I don't have any other friends, make some."

• Dr. Laura on Toxic Behavior:
  "[09:03] Dr. Laura: Well, sweetheart, people who tend to be self-driven and motivated and creative and involved are often a thorn in the side of people who aren't so much."

• Dr. Laura on Ghosting:
  "[09:12] Dr. Laura: We don't put you through that. Just block them. Ghost them. I understand it's called. And I don't always think ghosting is a bad idea. I think sometimes it isn't worth having the argument."

• Dr. Laura on Self-Worth:
  "[10:37] Dr. Laura: You are superior to them. They're going to try to tear you down. Okay, thank you very much and congratulations on all your efforts and I appreciate that you both called."

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Conclusion

This episode of Dr. Laura Call of the Day offers valuable insights into handling toxic friendships and underscores the importance of self-respect and personal boundaries. Dr. Laura's empathetic yet straightforward advice provides listeners with the tools to make difficult decisions that ultimately foster healthier, more supportive relationships. For those navigating similar challenges, Ava's situation serves as a relatable example, illustrating that prioritizing one's well-being is paramount.

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For more episodes and daily advice, visit DrLaura.com and become a Family member today!

Transcript

[Dr. Laura]

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[Stacy]

Hi, Dr. Laura.

[Ava]

Hi, Dr. Laura.

[Dr. Laura]

Hi. The first voice, is that Stacy?

[Stacy]

Yes, I'm Stacy.

[Dr. Laura]

That leaves you, Ava. How old are you both?

[Stacy]

I'm 20.

[Ava]

I'm 15.

[Dr. Laura]

Okay. How long have you been sisters, Ava?

[Ava]

My whole life.

[Dr. Laura]

Trick question. Okay, make sure everybody's paying attention. All right, what can I do for you?

[Stacy]

So, Dr. Laura, we need some advice on a situation that she's having with some of her friends. So a little background. My sister is a freshman in high school. She's full time, plays sports and she runs her own business, so she's super busy. But she has two friends, they're sisters, one 15 and the other is almost 18. And these girls are homeschooled, so they have way more free time. They constantly spam her with messages and reels. And my sister has a hard time managing her time, so she very politely asked them to slow down the messages and they immediately started texting her. Wow, that's rude. You hurt our feelings. So my sister called things to clear things up and they made it worse, saying over the phone, I guess we can't be as close anymore because we can't text you reals. I guess your business is more important than us. You always make us feel bad like this. And the girls even mentioned that their parents were involved and their mom was in the car listening to the call, which my sister was Crying on. And these girls knew that she was crying, but instead of backing off, they kept gaslighting her. And then the call ended. They ignored her for a day, and now they're texting her, saying, we're sorry. You know, we love you so much. We love you infinitely. Sorry if it came across wrong. And my mother and I have seen red flags in these girls for a while. The cycle of guilt tripping and love bombing. But she feels like they're her only friends and she doesn't want to lose them. So that's why we wanted to call you boy.

[Dr. Laura]

Well, what do you do for a living?

[Ava]

I have an Etsy shop and a YouTube channel.

[Dr. Laura]

Yeah. You are incredibly articulate. You make 20 look smarter than most. 22 look. Okay, all right. You're a good role model for 20. All right, kiddo, what is your. That was my sister talking.

[Stacy]

I'm sorry.

[Dr. Laura]

Okay.

[Stacy]

That was her. Her business was Etsy.

[Dr. Laura]

Okay, Ava. I'm sorry. Ava, Etsy is your business?

[Ava]

Yes.

[Dr. Laura]

Okay. And what do you, Etsy, what do you sell?

[Ava]

I sell jewelry. So necklaces, bracelets, rings.

[Dr. Laura]

Are these things you create or you're a middle woman?

[Ava]

I create them.

[Dr. Laura]

And how do you do that?

[Ava]

I usually just make beaded bracelets or, like, charm necklaces. I pick out the charms and I, like, put them together.

[Dr. Laura]

Okay. And how's business?

[Ava]

It's been pretty good. I started it, I think, around last summer, so I've had around 200 sales.

[Dr. Laura]

Wow. That's very successful. Good for you. You have a favorite color or style?

[Ava]

I really like gold jewelry. And very classy. I also like blues. Pinks?

[Dr. Laura]

Yeah, I'm a pink man.

[Stacy]

She also has a YouTube channel.

[Dr. Laura]

Okay. And what do you YouTube?

[Ava]

I do stop motion and, like, art videos with my Barbie dolls.

[Dr. Laura]

That sounds cute. Okay. All right. I have something to say to you, Ava. And it's not going to be the last time you're going to recognize this in your life. Your friends are jealous.

[Ava]

Oh, yeah.

[Dr. Laura]

That's what this is all about. And that they drove you to tears. Makes me want to smack them. But they're jealous.

[Stacy]

Okay?

[Dr. Laura]

You two are articulate and accomplished young ladies. At an age most kids are just spinning. Like those two girls.

[Ava]

Yeah.

[Dr. Laura]

Anybody who could be that mean with an adult around, block them from your phone. And I mean that and this nonsense. If I don't have any other friends, make some. Listen, I know you're busy. You've got a lot on your plate. We all do. That's why Walmart subscriptions are such a game. Changer. They make it easy for you to get your groceries and essentials without the hassle of running around. Walmart subscriptions can help you stay stocked on the things you use most like paper towels, avocados, pet food, baby supplies, vitamins, candles, your favorite snacks. You know the essentials you can't live without. Plus, Walmart Fresh groceries are backed by a 100% freshness guarantee. Walmart subscriptions are easy to use. Just choose the date and time for your go to items to be delivered on repeat right to your door. Of course, life is full of unexpected surprises. So if a last minute meeting or trip to the doctor comes up, simply edit your delivery schedule, Change the frequency of your subscriptions, skip or cancel anytime. Walmart's subscriptions are all about helping make your busy life a bit easier. Stay stocked with Walmart subscriptions. Welcome to your Walmart.

[D]

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[Dr. Laura]

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[D]

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[Dr. Laura]

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[D]

She's just a little girl.

[Ava]

She's faking.

[Dr. Laura]

She has adult teeth. There are signs of puberty.

[D]

Inspired by the shocking stories that tore a family apart.

[Dr. Laura]

I don't know what's going on. How old are you? You should get a lawyer. You have no idea how those people hurt this girl.

[D]

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[E]

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[Dr. Laura]

You don't stay with trash because those are the only containers you have. You don't do that.

[Stacy]

Yeah, thank you for telling her that. I really wanted her to hear it from you because they don't listen to the sister or the mom.

[Dr. Laura]

Well, sweetheart, people who tend to be self driven and motivated and creative and involved are often a thorn in the side of people who aren't so much. And if they don't have confidence in their own lives, which most kids at your age don't have, they can be quite mean. So I recommend they get blocked soon as you hang up because you don't need to be abused anymore. All the things that they said in the car with their mother, there was abusive behavior. And I only allow one strike for abusiveness. One strike. Because if you permit them to come back, nothing. Just block them. You won't get texts, you won't get emails, you won't get calls. Block them. You don't have to explain anything to them. They'll get it. They'll understand. We want to apologize. Apology not accepted. Go away. I don't want to put you through that. Just block them. Ghost them. I understand it's called. And I don't always think ghosting is a bad idea. I think sometimes it isn't worth having the argument. And girls like that. They'll escalate.

[Ava]

Yeah.

[Dr. Laura]

Because they don't like to lose. And you are so fortunate that you have an older sister who cares this much about you. Like, wow.

[Ava]

Yeah.

[Stacy]

Thank you, Dr. Laura.

[Dr. Laura]

Have any other questions? You're superior to them. They're going to try to tear you down. Okay, thank you very much and congratulations on all your efforts and I appreciate that you both called. Yeah. Don't tolerate any of that nonsense. They're envious. They don't have all that creativity she uses Barbie dolls to do. I think that's so cute. We should have gotten there. See if you can call them back. And where do I find this? On YouTube. I'd kind of like to see this. I think it would be adorable. So, yeah, my number, 1-800-375-2872. If you like this podcast, be sure to rate it on Apple Podcast or your favorite place to listen to my podcast. Of course. I'd love if you gave me five stars. And be sure to share this podcast with a friend on Facebook or your preferred social media platform.

[F]

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