Therapy is Making Things Worse

Summary

Summary of "Therapy is Making Things Worse"

Podcast: Dr. Laura Call of the Day
Host: Dr. Laura Schlessinger
Release Date: May 2, 2025

Introduction

In the episode titled "Therapy is Making Things Worse," Dr. Laura Schlessinger engages in a profound conversation with a caller named Daniel from Toronto, Ontario. The discussion centers around the appropriateness of diagnosing Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD) in the context of personal grief and the effectiveness of current therapeutic practices.

Caller’s Dilemma: PTSD Diagnosis After Tragedy

Daniel initiates the conversation by expressing gratitude for Dr. Laura’s program and seeks her opinion on his ongoing PTSD treatment sessions. He reveals that his brother passed away two years prior by suicide, prompting him to seek therapy.

Notable Quote:
Daniel [01:26]: "I've been starting these PTSD treatment sessions... My brother passed away two years ago. He took his life."

Dr. Laura’s Questioning of the Diagnosis

Dr. Laura challenges the necessity of a PTSD diagnosis in Daniel’s situation, emphasizing that experiencing sadness and anger after a loved one’s death is a normal human response, not necessarily a clinical disorder.

Notable Quote:
Dr. Laura [02:20]: "Why does it need a diagnosis? I don't understand. Help me?"

The Overuse of PTSD in Modern Therapy

Daniel expresses skepticism about the frequent use of PTSD as a diagnosis, feeling that it is prescribed too readily without substantial justification.

Notable Quote:
Daniel [02:41]: "I just feel like that's something that's given out so freely now."

Dr. Laura agrees, critiquing the current state of therapy where revisiting trauma repeatedly can lead to fixation rather than healing.

Notable Quote:
Dr. Laura [03:30]: "Hashing and going over it makes things sit in cement. It's ridiculous. Form of therapy. Ridiculous."

Normalizing Grief and Moving Forward

Dr. Laura stresses that grief should be processed naturally without the need for constant therapeutic intervention. She advises Daniel to acknowledge his feelings and continue living his life, contributing positively to those around him.

Notable Quote:
Dr. Laura [04:17]: "You're supposed to feel sad. It's a normal human neurobiological mechanism. Normal."

She further emphasizes personal responsibility, suggesting that Daniel owes it to his family and himself to move forward rather than dwell excessively on his loss.

Notable Quote:
Dr. Laura [07:15]: "You owe the blessing of life to continue living it in a healthy, productive way."

Critique of Modern Therapeutic Practices

Dr. Laura criticizes the therapeutic industry's tendency to label normal emotional responses as clinical issues for revenue purposes. She mentions how terms like "narcissistic" and "PTSD" are overused, diluting their significance.

Notable Quote:
Dr. Laura [10:11]: "Nobody's narcissistic anymore. Now everybody's PTSD."

Emphasis on Heritage and Personal Strength

Drawing on historical references, Dr. Laura encourages Daniel to draw strength from his heritage and the resilience exhibited by his grandparents during the Holocaust. She underscores the importance of compassion and valuing life, rather than allowing grief to impede personal growth.

Notable Quote:
Dr. Laura [11:26]: "You owe them to do better than you're doing now. You owe them. They valued life, they valued compassion..."

Conclusion: Embracing Life’s Purpose

In closing, Dr. Laura reinforces the message that Daniel has much to offer and that engaging positively with life will naturally alleviate excessive sadness. She advises against prolonged therapy sessions that may hinder rather than help personal healing.

Notable Quote:
Dr. Laura [12:18]: "You have a lot to give, and there are many people who need you. That's how your life has purpose, meaning and value."

Daniel expresses his agreement and appreciation for Dr. Laura’s guidance, culminating the heartfelt conversation.

Notable Quote:
Daniel [12:43]: "Yeah. Well, thank you for that. Appreciate that."

Key Takeaways

• Normalizing Grief: Experiencing sadness and anger after a traumatic event, such as the loss of a loved one, is a natural human response and does not always necessitate a clinical diagnosis like PTSD.
• Critique of Over-Diagnosis: The overuse of labels like PTSD in therapy can lead to unnecessary fixation on past traumas, potentially hindering personal growth and healing.
• Personal Responsibility: Emphasizing the importance of moving forward and contributing positively to one’s community and loved ones as a means of overcoming grief.
• Heritage and Resilience: Drawing strength from personal and familial history can provide the necessary resilience to cope with loss and adversity.

Final Thoughts

Dr. Laura Schlessinger provides a perspective that challenges the current trends in therapeutic practices, advocating for natural emotional processing and personal accountability. Her conversation with Daniel underscores the importance of distinguishing between normal grief and clinical disorders, encouraging individuals to find strength in their lives and relationships.

Transcript

[Dr. Laura]

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[Daniel]

Hi Dr. Laura. Thank you so much for taking my call.

[Dr. Laura]

Thank you. What can I help you?

[Daniel]

Yeah, I just wanted to start off by saying you are such a lovely lady and I listen to you every day and I love the program and I just wanted to thank you for that.

[Dr. Laura]

Thank you.

[Daniel]

Basically, I wanted to get your opinion. I've been starting these PTSD treatment sessions and I'm calling from Toronto, Ontario and.

[Dr. Laura]

Basically in the military.

[Daniel]

No.

[Dr. Laura]

Oh, then what do you think gave you ptsd?

[Daniel]

So that's the, that's the thing. I don't even know if I have ptsd. But because the.

[Dr. Laura]

What do you think gave you ptsd? What do you think? Because you. You came right on and told me you're in therapy for that. So what happened to you? What's the trauma?

[Daniel]

My brother passed away two years ago. He took his life.

[Dr. Laura]

How about you? Sad and mad. Why did we go to a diagnosis of ptsd? Why did we give you a clinical chair? I mean, why?

[Daniel]

That's a good question. I just feel like that's something that's given out so freely now. And you know, this, this is the type of counseling we think you're upset.

[Dr. Laura]

That your brother died and killed himself. Isn't that normal reaction? Why does it need a diagnosis? I don't understand Help me?

[Daniel]

Well, that's a good question. I don't. I don't even know if that's something that would require a diagnosis and if this kind of.

[Dr. Laura]

No, I don't think so. I think everybody in the universe who loses somebody by death, whether it was by that hand or someone else's, is going to be terribly upset. And I call that normal, not a disease.

[Daniel]

Right. Yeah. And I just like, I think you're right about that. And just the fact that, you know, to constantly sit down and rehash it and go over it and, you know.

[Dr. Laura]

Hashing and going over it makes things sit in cement. It's ridiculous. Form of therapy. Ridiculous.

[Daniel]

Yeah, I mean, I've basically like, I've been trying to tell.

[Dr. Laura]

You don't have to try to tell anybody anything. Why are you in therapy?

[Daniel]

Yeah, that's a good question. I didn't know if it would help or not, so, I mean.

[Dr. Laura]

Help with what? Feeling sad. You're not supposed to get help for feeling sad. You're supposed to feel sad. It's a normal human neurobiological mechanism. Normal.

[Daniel]

And what would you suggest is a good way to deal with, you know, feelings, should they arise?

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[Daniel]

You know, it's just something. It's one of those things that, like, I just feel like I'm going to be very impacted by this, you know, for the rest of my life and.

[Dr. Laura]

Well, that's a nice place to hide. It's a nice place to hide. I suggest that people who have a close family member who kills themselves probably has it in their minds for the rest of their lives, but it doesn't get in the way of them being kind to people, reading books, hiking, doing charity work, working out with weights. That it's in your mind for the rest of your life is part of it. Yet to use that as an excuse to not get on with living. Whoa.

[Daniel]

I mean, I definitely think that I owe it to him, you know, to continue living and doing all.

[Dr. Laura]

Anything to him. You don't owe him him anything. He's the one who clocked out on his. He's the one who clocked out on his own volition, didn't get help, didn't go to therapy for 50 years and talk about this. He terminated himself, knowing full well as anybody does that you damage everybody you leave behind. You owe him nothing. But you owe the blessing of life to continue living it in a healthy, productive way. You owe life that. You owe everybody in your life who cares about you. You owe them to not sit here and simmer and I'm sad and. Or pissed.

[Daniel]

Yeah, I agree with you.

[Dr. Laura]

So pay the debt to all the people around you who need you to continue living like a reasonable person. He's dead. He doesn't need your behavior to change. They're all alive. They need you to live with them.

[Daniel]

Yeah, they definitely do. I mean, I have a nephew. He has a child that's turning five. And I think that, you know, it's important that I, you know, continue to be a good uncle and just, you know, to continue.

[Dr. Laura]

So stop with the therapy and start doing your best for everyone else. Yeah, there's nothing stupider than a therapy where you just sit and rehash the same crap Again and again. Because that just fixates it.

[Daniel]

Right. And especially, like, if it's PTSD centered and it's not ptsd. They're coming up.

[Dr. Laura]

Yes. That's the newest one. Yeah, I love that one. What? They've. Nobody's narcissistic anymore. Now everybody's ptsd. You know, I guess my profession, which is turned into a business, just goes in waves. That way they keep the revenue coming in.

[Daniel]

I think that, you know, I totally get what you're saying in terms of owing it to myself and living and doing all these things that, you know are good for me.

[Dr. Laura]

And you said, but do you know in concentration camps. Shush, shush. Do you know that in concentration camps during the Holocaust, starving, terrified people shared their food?

[Daniel]

Yeah, I know from firsthand experience. My grandparents.

[Dr. Laura]

Well, they shouldn't have been able to do that.

[Daniel]

Yeah, but they did.

[Dr. Laura]

That's right. You owe them to do better than you're doing now. You owe them. They not only valued life, they valued the quality of life. They valued compassion in spite of the satanic stuff going on around them. That's your heritage, not your brother.

[Daniel]

Yeah, very good point.

[Dr. Laura]

You have a lot to give, and there are many people who need you. That's how your life has purpose, meaning and value. And in doing so, you're not going to spend a lot of time being sad because you'll be back into life.

[Daniel]

Yeah. Well, thank you for that. Appreciate that.

[Dr. Laura]

Okay, Sarah, call me anytime you need me to nag you again.

[Daniel]

You're amazing. Thank you. Thanks for.

[Dr. Laura]

You're very welcome. You're very welcome. My number, 1-800-375-2872. Check out my social media on Facebook and Instagram. I post stories, photos and videos seven days a week and feature some of what you sent me, too. There's always something interesting going on there. You can find me at facebook.com drlaura and instagram.com drlauraprogram.

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