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Host Martin
You can get one of these if you move too much.
Dr. Emily Jones
Okay, this is a one, one and done situation.
Co-host Sai Angeli
Oh, no.
Host Martin
You'll be back if you're good. This. Hey, we'll put you on payroll.
Co-host Hunter
Go on a journey, folks.
Co-host Sai Angeli
Well, you got to put your head on journey to infinity and beyond.
Host Martin
Do we have to explain what we're doing? I think so, but we don' what else we're doing.
Co-host Hunter
The starship Enterprise is always going to places they say that no one's been before. So that's what we're doing today.
Host Martin
We're doing it today.
Co-host Hunter
We're fixing to go.
Host Martin
Should I give them back?
Co-host Hunter
Have a counseling
Host Martin
Sigh the other day. I'll just do the backdrop real quick before I introduce our guest.
Co-host Sai Angeli
Before we're at.
Host Martin
We're at size house. It was me, Philip McMillan, licensed counselor, and Sam, who was. And sigh was like, we need a counselor to come on and just talk about stuff. And maybe Sai has a few questions.
Co-host Hunter
Well, no, no.
Host Martin
And I was kind of like, well, that. Philip's been doing that for 30 years. He's like, not Philip. And immediately in my brain I was like, well, there's Scar's mom.
Dr. Emily Jones
Oh, my gosh. I am Scar's mom.
Host Martin
Remember Zazu Carter? Oh, I was like, she raised Scar.
Dr. Emily Jones
My son was Scar from the.
Co-host Sai Angeli
Okay.
Host Martin
And I've known Emily for a while, and she's hilarious to me, even though she's not trying to be. And so I was like, I texted her, I said, emily, SA needs a counselor. Are you in? And her immediate answer was no.
Co-host Sai Angeli
Immediate was absolutely not.
Co-host Hunter
Wait a minute.
Host Martin
But I talked her into it. Well, so we have Dr. Emily Jones, PhD, LMFT-S, LPC-S. That's right.
Co-host Hunter
So what? Forget all that junk. What do you actually do for a living?
Dr. Emily Jones
So I'm a counselor by trade, but,
Co-host Hunter
hey, you're a psychiatrist, in other words.
Dr. Emily Jones
No, that's actually illegal for me to say that. So no counselor, no medicine. Well, you got a Ph.D. i do, but not. I'm a doctor, but not the kind that makes good money. Yeah, yeah,
Co-host Hunter
yeah.
Host Martin
But she's one of the smartest people I know, sir.
Dr. Emily Jones
So I work at a nonprofit locally, and I'm a clinical director there. I teach online for a master's program in counseling, and then I do a little bit of private practice for myself.
Co-host Sai Angeli
Oh, wow.
Host Martin
I told y' all I had an expert.
Co-host Sai Angeli
Yeah, lots of world. Lots of branches I like. Yeah, yeah, that's cool.
Host Martin
She even has a website.
Co-host Sai Angeli
Diversifying income. I like that. We can get. We talk about that.
Host Martin
You're the only place I can find you.
Co-host Sai Angeli
Oh, here.
Co-host Hunter
Well, my question is, do you have a battery of test or questions that you ask a patient?
Dr. Emily Jones
We do, yeah.
Co-host Hunter
Well, good. Let's run through that.
Host Martin
I don't think we can do that.
Co-host Hunter
Well, you may do that.
Host Martin
We can. I don't know.
Co-host Hunter
She's an adult. We can do this.
Dr. Emily Jones
I'm here today as a friend of the podcast. That's counselor adjacent. How. I'm not here to be your counselor today. I didn't bring my instruments with me.
Host Martin
You have instruments?
Dr. Emily Jones
Oh, you know, the test.
Co-host Hunter
Oh, you have tools of the trade.
Dr. Emily Jones
Tools of the trade. I didn't bring any of that with me today.
Co-host Sai Angeli
Well, I wish she had, like, a brain scan.
Co-host Hunter
I was thinking, I don't have one of those.
Co-host Sai Angeli
An EEG to put on him while we're doing this. That would have been awesome.
Co-host Hunter
No, no, that would have been. Yeah.
Co-host Sai Angeli
What, like some weird.
Co-host Hunter
It may have been a flat. It may have been a flat line.
Host Martin
Yeah, yours is definitely moving all over the place.
Co-host Sai Angeli
Yeah, I bet that you. We got to get the next one after Emily. I just had an idea. We've got to have side take a polygraph.
Dr. Emily Jones
Oh, that's a good idea because I'd
Co-host Sai Angeli
like to see those. Those things jump all up and down on him.
Host Martin
Do you have any patients that went to Nam?
Dr. Emily Jones
No. My dad was in Vietnam, though. He was brain and had pretty severe mental health issues afterwards and also drank a lot to self medicine.
Co-host Hunter
Well, no, no, because like most people say, well, was you in any heavy action? And I said, no. I said, but you don't understand.
Dr. Emily Jones
Yeah, it doesn't matter.
Co-host Hunter
That doesn't matter. And I had a guy that won the Medal of Honor for his action in Vietnam, and he said, here, hold it. And I said, no, that's yours. He said, no. He said, you serve, right? And I said, yeah. I said, but. But no. You know that that belongs to you, what you did. And he said, no, it doesn't. Part of it belongs to you because you serve. Well, I. He screwed my head up when he done that, okay. Because this man got shot, like, five times and saved numerous of his buddies, y', all, during combat action. But people don't understand that if you go to a foreign country and the foreign country, you're in war there, and, you know, all they want to do is kill you. Well, it does something to your psyche.
Dr. Emily Jones
It does. My dad's the reason I'm a counselor, because I grew up with him and all of the things that he experienced from that, and I wanted to be helpful.
Co-host Hunter
Well, somebody asked me, sir, Weller, do you think you have any of the trauma involved with war? I said, probably. Probably. I do. I manage it. Because I don't even know. Yeah, because when I. The reason I say that, because on Veterans Day, okay. And they start running all these war movies. I'm watching a war movie and just bust out crying.
Dr. Emily Jones
Yeah.
Co-host Hunter
You know, And I'm going, what is wrong with you?
Dr. Emily Jones
Well, you had trauma, and y' all came home and just had to go back to life.
Co-host Hunter
No, no. Because if somebody would have got in my face.
Dr. Emily Jones
I know.
Co-host Hunter
No. Yeah. That would just be one of them. Hey, that's something you don't do well,
Dr. Emily Jones
I'll tell you right now. So my son and John Davidson are in the same grade, and Henry came home and told me that they were learning about hippies in their social studies.
Host Martin
Well, our kids are learning about hippies.
Dr. Emily Jones
They're learning about hippies in their social studies class.
Co-host Sai Angeli
I don't think you girl Carter. Quite hard.
Dr. Emily Jones
And Henry said, do you want to know what I said about that? And I was like, no.
Host Martin
Yeah, I want to know. I want to know what Henry said.
Dr. Emily Jones
Well, they started. All of his little friends apparently know all of his grandpa's stories about what his grandpa would say about hippies. And I'm like, keep that down. Keep that quiet.
Co-host Sai Angeli
Yeah, hippies are.
Co-host Hunter
Well, no, no, because that's. See, that's what I look at the day. Our young people. Good grief. There we go. Stuff they can get into, especially if they got one of these stupid things.
Host Martin
There it is.
Co-host Hunter
There we go.
Host Martin
Emily's an expert in this.
Co-host Hunter
Well, no, no, she hasn't said anything wrong yet.
Dr. Emily Jones
Keep going.
Co-host Hunter
I was shocked to hear that our kids today spend, like, 80 hours a week.
Dr. Emily Jones
Oh, it's a lot on this.
Co-host Hunter
80 hours, you know, and they asked a machine a bunch of questions, and then it gets so bad that they killed herself after they asked this stupid machine a question.
Dr. Emily Jones
Yeah, it happens.
Co-host Sai Angeli
Yeah.
Dr. Emily Jones
And kids are getting exposed younger and younger.
Co-host Hunter
Well, no, no, that's another thing. Oh, yeah.
Host Martin
So that's. That's one of the reasons we wanted Emily on. Because you've been yelling about cell phones for a minute.
Dr. Emily Jones
Well, so far, size the person I agree with most in this room.
Co-host Sai Angeli
No, no, that's just because I haven't said the thing.
Co-host Hunter
The kids today have got a lot of crap to wade through.
Dr. Emily Jones
They do. That's true.
Co-host Hunter
I'm serious.
Dr. Emily Jones
I will say, though, like, a lot of what's going on, though, is kids are not connected in their home to their parents because parents are distracted by their own or their jobs. Kids are not connected at school because, you know, Covid, they got pulled from school for a few years.
Co-host Hunter
And what you're saying there is. It's isolation.
Dr. Emily Jones
It is. And it's a lack of connection.
Host Martin
And modeling that.
Co-host Hunter
Hey, that's does. That's messing with your psyche.
Dr. Emily Jones
It does. It has a huge impact.
Co-host Hunter
Okay. Is if you become so isolated. That's why, like, a guy goes berserk, starts shooting up people.
Dr. Emily Jones
Well, and kids don't.
Co-host Hunter
Because he's got no one to talk to.
Dr. Emily Jones
Yeah.
Co-host Hunter
To tell him, hey, dude, whoa, whoa, whoa. Your thinking is wrong on this.
Dr. Emily Jones
Yeah. Or they don't know how to talk to people. And that's a big thing, too. Right now with AI, kids are going on like ChatGPT, and actually AI gets smarter and learns how to talk to you. And so kids are struggling socially, but then connecting with AI and thinking that that's a real relationship and that happens a lot
Co-host Hunter
literally scares the you know what out of me?
Dr. Emily Jones
It's something to be very aware of,
Co-host Hunter
is that you would trust a stupid machine.
Dr. Emily Jones
Well, when you're 10 years old and nobody teaches you how to monitor that for yourself or what to do on the Internet, or you don't have a maybe. A maybe you have a hard home and you don't have anybody to talk to.
Co-host Hunter
I guess it's because they're missing common sense.
Dr. Emily Jones
I would say so maybe. But also, like, I think a lot of it is. There's not a lot of connection for kids. They don't know how to connect with other people. They don't know how to be in relationship with others. It's getting harder and harder for kids to do that. And adults. By the way, it's not just kids.
Co-host Sai Angeli
This message is sponsored by Raycon. And the other day I went and got on airplane. I reached in my backpack and what happened? I forgot my Raycon. Oh, I forgot them on the charger.
Host Martin
Say it ain't so. You didn't. You only got charge them for 10 minutes because they got that quick charge feature and they're ready to go.
Co-host Sai Angeli
Which is what I did on my way out the door. Raycon's Everyday Earbuds classic is packed with upgrades. They got active noise cancellation and a comfortable design that stays put no matter what you're doing. Plus, the new colors are awesome. My favorite's the electric blue look. Raycon delivers the same premium audio quality as the big brands, but at half the price. And with over 3 million happy customers and a 30 day happiness guarantee, there's zero reason to overpay.
Host Martin
That awareness mode is clutch too, because you can still hear what's going on around you.
Co-host Sai Angeli
Look, I love my Raycons. I know you will too. The Everyday Earbuds classic are the perfect addition to everyday routine. Look, go to buyraycon.com to get 15% off. That's buyraycon.com thanks, Raycon, for sponsoring our show. So I got a question.
Host Martin
I got lots of.
Co-host Sai Angeli
I got lots of them too. But what would you say your area of expertise is there like one that you're more.
Dr. Emily Jones
Yeah.
Co-host Sai Angeli
Okay. I didn't know. I didn't know if like in that, you know, like biologist. That's what I am, a trained biologist. I was the nerd side of this thing.
Host Martin
You didn't finish.
Co-host Sai Angeli
Yeah, don't care. Look what happened.
Host Martin
She wrote her paper.
Co-host Sai Angeli
So that's good. I wrote. There's like 3/4 of mine I never defended. It's written, it's written, it's just not defended. So expertise.
Host Martin
Yeah.
Co-host Sai Angeli
Back as we were.
Dr. Emily Jones
Parenting.
Co-host Sai Angeli
Parenting. Oh, okay. All right. I like that because I got questions about twin boys that are drastically different.
Dr. Emily Jones
Yeah. My expertise is mostly trauma, informed parenting and then marital counseling. So, like attachment and trauma.
Co-host Sai Angeli
Okay.
Dr. Emily Jones
All those things around there.
Co-host Sai Angeli
Okay, there you go.
Host Martin
I got lots of questions.
Co-host Sai Angeli
That's interesting.
Host Martin
How do you raise Carter? And can I just send them to your house?
Dr. Emily Jones
Y' all are doing a great job. Keep doing what you're doing.
Co-host Sai Angeli
Yeah, keep doing what you do. Carter's a G man.
Dr. Emily Jones
He's a Great.
Co-host Sai Angeli
Yeah. You doing nothing.
Dr. Emily Jones
He's a great kid.
Co-host Sai Angeli
So if I were to come to you and say perhaps, you know, hypothetical
Dr. Emily Jones
situation here, because this isn't counseling.
Co-host Sai Angeli
Yeah. It gets out. It's. Yeah, it's just. What? You know, just hypotheticals here. Like you, you go outside and you find your twin three year old boys ttn on their dog. What? What? What? That's not a learned behavior. What is this? What's that about? What could that possibly be about?
Dr. Emily Jones
Their boys, okay. They are the dog off and just tell them to pee elsewhere in the yard. Yeah, if that's your problem.
Co-host Sai Angeli
No, it's only happened once and it. Well, I mean, it might have happened yesterday.
Dr. Emily Jones
They're trying to figure it out. They're trying to figure out what?
Host Martin
About his kid. That headbutt stuff.
Co-host Sai Angeli
Oh, yeah. Well, like metal in the honey hole. He just. He acts like the pole was going to move or something. It sounded like it. What did he do after he cried and come to me?
Host Martin
I did not laugh immediately.
Co-host Hunter
I loved the answer you gave.
Host Martin
I waited a second.
Co-host Hunter
Well, you. He asked you that. She said you said they're boys.
Co-host Sai Angeli
Yeah, it was less of a headbutt and more of just a direct.
Dr. Emily Jones
I bet he won't do that exact thing again.
Co-host Sai Angeli
Yeah, yeah, he's actually, he's the. What's funny is he's the safe one.
Dr. Emily Jones
That's what you have to realize. Kids are like constantly. We get confused and think kids should know things. They are constantly learning from every experience. Experience they have. And so there's a lot of natural consequences that are built into head butting a metal pole at a.
Co-host Sai Angeli
Well, he ran. Well, he just ran face first into that one.
Host Martin
No, he paused, looked at it and headbutted.
Co-host Sai Angeli
Yeah, but I mean, I don't.
Host Martin
I know this because we heard it, but I got cameras, man.
Co-host Sai Angeli
Yo, you on my Instagram. It was on security camera.
Host Martin
Watch this kid.
Co-host Sai Angeli
Boom.
Co-host Hunter
Oh, my.
Host Martin
Oh, I did not laugh until about now.
Dr. Emily Jones
Did his brother tell him? I don't. It doesn't look like he knew where he was running.
Co-host Sai Angeli
Yeah, it was.
Dr. Emily Jones
I think he was looking down.
Co-host Hunter
He wasn't paying attention.
Dr. Emily Jones
He wasn't paying attention.
Co-host Sai Angeli
Yeah.
Dr. Emily Jones
His little eyes are looking down and him and his brother were running at the same time. That was on purpose.
Co-host Sai Angeli
Yeah.
Co-host Hunter
That's one thing that most parents. That's one thing when most parents say something. Oh, they ain't. Oh, don't really worry about it. They ain't paying attention.
Dr. Emily Jones
He's fine.
Co-host Sai Angeli
That poor kid had it rough though, because the next Day his mama hit him up between eyes with a football.
Co-host Hunter
He was.
Co-host Sai Angeli
Next time he was looking and then he wasn't, so she. Like, he was looking, so she threw it. He looked down. About the time she let go and it looked back up.
Co-host Hunter
Boom.
Co-host Sai Angeli
Right. I thought, buddy, I mean, we're going to have to get you a helmet. And you're the. You're the safe one. Like the big headed, clumsy ones, the one that is reckless, abandoned through everything. So that was. No. Yeah. That's interesting. Yeah.
Dr. Emily Jones
Like, they're boys.
Co-host Sai Angeli
They're boys. Yeah. Is there any reason they'd be drastically different, your twins?
Host Martin
Very different.
Dr. Emily Jones
Yeah. I think. I think people get confused when they see twins. Are they identical?
Co-host Sai Angeli
No, they're fraternal.
Dr. Emily Jones
Okay, well, then they're totally different. Separate sets.
Co-host Hunter
Yeah, they're.
Dr. Emily Jones
They just came out at the same time. And so.
Co-host Sai Angeli
Yeah.
Dr. Emily Jones
I used to think that everything was really like, you know, people say nature versus nurture.
Co-host Sai Angeli
Yeah. That argument shot.
Dr. Emily Jones
Well, I used to really be like, it's all about nurture.
Co-host Sai Angeli
Yeah.
Dr. Emily Jones
And like, the more biology I learned, because that's not my background, the more I realized, like, it's a huge mix of both.
Co-host Sai Angeli
And so, yeah, DNA, strong DNA, is powerful.
Co-host Hunter
That's what I was thinking about. Okay, you tell me why they never. It's DNA.
Co-host Sai Angeli
Yeah. DNA is power.
Co-host Hunter
Yeah.
Co-host Sai Angeli
Yeah. One of them got a lot of me. One of them got a lot of his mom.
Dr. Emily Jones
Yeah.
Co-host Hunter
That's so. Wow.
Co-host Sai Angeli
Yeah.
Dr. Emily Jones
Did you ever learn about epigenetics class? Yeah, that was something new that I learned, too.
Host Martin
We're getting left behind, buddy. Did you hear that word those two just use?
Co-host Hunter
Oh, that's fine.
Co-host Sai Angeli
Yeah. Genetics. I love.
Host Martin
What did you just say?
Co-host Sai Angeli
I loved and hated those classes all at the same time.
Host Martin
Epigenetics. What?
Dr. Emily Jones
Epigenetics. It's basically. It's more of a new. It's a newer and more emerging field and study of like, DNA, because everybody thinks so. Did you ever heard the. Hear the word Tabula Rosa? You did.
Host Martin
Come on.
Dr. Emily Jones
Yeah, you did.
Host Martin
Tabular. Okay, so that sounds like something out of Jurassic Park.
Co-host Hunter
Emily.
Dr. Emily Jones
So it's the idea that everybody comes out and it's a blank slate. So if I get a baby, it's all up to me how this baby turns out.
Host Martin
Oh, no way.
Dr. Emily Jones
Blank slate, Right?
Co-host Hunter
Yeah.
Dr. Emily Jones
Okay. Well, epigenetics actually is a new field of study that shows that trauma and life experiences actually changes the way your DNA is expressed. And so think about whenever conception happens, what is passed on to a child to create them? DNA. So A child can have traumatic experiences expressed onto their DNA without ever having left the womb.
Host Martin
This is the smartest thing I've ever heard in my life. This is why we had.
Co-host Hunter
Oh, no, no, no.
Co-host Sai Angeli
You know why? You know why I know about this? Because I was drastically concerned why they were so different. So then I got into nerding out and I was like, oh, my goodness gracious. Like, that's crazy. Right? Like, they've even linked some of this stuff to just. Like, even in men, sperm health just. You've got. You've got unhealthy sperm that make an egg.
Dr. Emily Jones
Yep.
Co-host Sai Angeli
And so it leads to an unhealthy set of DNA. I mean, it's crazy, man. It's wild. Like, it's wild. What they're doing with this stuff now, what they figured out in genetics is it's a lot more than just ACGT in your DNA. Like, there's a lot more. There's a lot more shifts that.
Co-host Hunter
Well, no, no, like you said. Okay. Adenine, when you look at all this, when it comes together, is in fame.
Dr. Emily Jones
It is.
Co-host Hunter
Okay. Because I look like when a woman's carrying a baby or two. Or three. Yeah. Or three. Or four. You know, that's just mind blowing. Okay. That everything still works. And she's gained. She's gained 20 pounds right here.
Dr. Emily Jones
So it's an experience.
Host Martin
We've never been.
Dr. Emily Jones
Yeah, I know.
Co-host Hunter
That's why we hear. You know, that's why I see a lot of people.
Host Martin
Your kidney stones are worse always.
Co-host Hunter
They know. I love the women that was told. I love them.
Co-host Sai Angeli
That's not our opinion.
Host Martin
That was a guest.
Co-host Sai Angeli
That was a guest who.
Co-host Hunter
Yeah, no, because I always. You know, moms are a. They're a hybrid.
Host Martin
A hybrid.
Co-host Hunter
Yeah. They really are. Because they put up with crap that. Not. Not natural. Okay. Put up with the husband first, and then they have babies and then.
Host Martin
Husband's delightful.
Dr. Emily Jones
My husband is a delight.
Host Martin
He's one of the nicest people.
Co-host Sai Angeli
Oh, yes. He gets counseled everybody.
Host Martin
When I met her husband.
Co-host Sai Angeli
You inadvertently counsel your husband, like, accidentally, like, you don't.
Host Martin
Because you're refusing to counsel us today.
Dr. Emily Jones
The only time it ever happened, we got in a fight in the car when I was in school, and I'm pretty reactive. And I sort of was like, okay. And I slowed down. I was like, well, tell me. And he was like, no. He was like, you will not therapize me. I was like. And so, you know, he would rather raging Emily than therapist Emily.
Co-host Sai Angeli
Yeah, just go ahead and bite my head off. Get this. Whatever this is gonna be. But do not ask me how this makes sense.
Dr. Emily Jones
That's the only. That's the only time I learned my lesson from there.
Host Martin
Oh, that's funny.
Co-host Sai Angeli
So you got marriage and you got
Host Martin
trauma and you've got raising kids.
Co-host Sai Angeli
Yeah, because that.
Dr. Emily Jones
It all goes together.
Host Martin
Carter asked me when he can get a cell phone, and we get that question a lot in emails. Like, so what? In your professional opinion? My answer is never.
Dr. Emily Jones
So I'll just. I mean, like, my professional opinion, the longer you can delay, the better. In my personal home, when Henry can drive, he will have a dumb cell phone. He does have a watch, like a smartwatch that we program all the numbers into for him to be able to call.
Host Martin
Are you the reason I have one of those watches?
Dr. Emily Jones
Maybe it's a good thing to have. But, no, he already knows that. And they're already, you know, like, he's surrounded by kids at church and extracurriculars in school that already have them, and he's just already made his piece with, like, yeah, that's not gonna be my story.
Co-host Sai Angeli
Okay.
Host Martin
So I think that's part of the problem, though. All these kids are getting together, and, you know, one kid's cool because he has a phone, and then there you have to make your kid be, like, the one that doesn't. Hey, you're not that guy.
Dr. Emily Jones
Yeah, well, I sort of told Henry. I'm like, our goal is to be set apart because, you know, we're Christians, and so, like, our goal is to be set apart. So, like, consider this practice of being set apart and it being uncomfortable and unfun for you. And, like, sometimes you might get left out, and that's okay. But I'm also thankful that, like, we have families that have similar abuses. We do. And other people have phones for different reasons. They may have family situations or work situations where that's needed for our family. That's not something we need right now, and that's okay. And so. But it's not just. It's not just a phone. That's the problem. Like, kids have iPads and tablets and laptops and all of those things.
Co-host Sai Angeli
We're almost four years. No iPad.
Host Martin
Bravo.
Co-host Sai Angeli
Praise God.
Dr. Emily Jones
My kids do have iPads. We bought them last year. Henry is 11 and Hadley is 6. They have little Amazon fire tablets, but we also have, again, I know too much for my job. And so, like, there's no Internet access on it.
Co-host Sai Angeli
It's all whatever y' all put on there, whatever we put on there.
Dr. Emily Jones
And they don't know our WI fi password so they can't get on. So if we go on a trip, we have to download all of their Disney movies before we get on the road if they're going to watch it. But we keep those in our bedroom. And like, they don't have access to any of that in the house without us.
Host Martin
See, parenting is work. And I think that's like what you just said. That was you. You took a lot of extra steps there. And I think most people these days are just like, there, get after it.
Dr. Emily Jones
Because when we. How old are you?
Co-host Sai Angeli
I'm 40.
Dr. Emily Jones
You're 40?
Co-host Sai Angeli
Yeah.
Host Martin
You should know that. We're friends.
Dr. Emily Jones
I know, but you're younger than me.
Co-host Sai Angeli
He's 37.
Host Martin
36, man.
Dr. Emily Jones
He's 36.
Co-host Sai Angeli
Give him, give him 15 days.
Dr. Emily Jones
My husband's 37. He just turned.
Host Martin
So, like, nicest guy on earth.
Dr. Emily Jones
Nicest guy. He really is. You'd like him, but.
Host Martin
Well, it takes a minute because you're like, is he really this nice?
Co-host Sai Angeli
Oh, one of those. Like, are you, like, are you up to something? But then so nice. Like, all right, where are you. Where are you going to put the knife?
Dr. Emily Jones
But he is like, no.
Host Martin
But then it turns out there's no knife.
Dr. Emily Jones
It's just a pat on the back.
Co-host Sai Angeli
Hey, that's good.
Dr. Emily Jones
But the reality is, is like, we got these phones when we were growing up and now we're parenting. And like when we had these phones, it was a different situation.
Co-host Sai Angeli
All right, look, springtime is here. It's warming up. You know what that means? That means more outside cooking. And y' all know we love to eat beef around here, and that's because of our friends over at Trails. Beef makes such a good product, baby. Ain't it good?
Host Martin
It's so good. It's our friend S. Robertson would say buy on the grill.
Co-host Sai Angeli
Look, before we got trys getting ready for a cookout, man, somebody had to run the grocery store, do all the things, grab whatever was left in case you were late in the day. And you never really know where that beef come from. But with Tri Tails beef, we skip the grocery store and do it a different way. Tri Tails comes from a family ranch out in Texas. They're a fifth generation American ranch. So they've been at it for a while now. Look, the beef comes straight from their ranch and other ranchers they work with who raise cattle the same way. Their steaks are properly aged and shipped straight from the ranch to your door. We threw a couple of ribeyes on the grill. Look, salt, pepper, garlic, hot Fire. That's all you need. Look, because I tell you what, when the beef comes from people who raise cattle for a living, you can taste the difference. The tenderness and the flavor are fantastic. So if you're stocking the freezer for grilling season, go check out Tritels Beef. I know in size case. Christine loves it, which is just a. She doesn't eat meat.
Co-host Hunter
Being a big me. These are folks.
Co-host Sai Angeli
Yeah, just go to try beef.com. that's tribe beef.com/duck. Support ranch families and eat some dang good steak.
Co-host Hunter
I've no, you know, kids day that they call themselves furries.
Host Martin
What?
Co-host Sai Angeli
That was a weird segue.
Co-host Hunter
No, no, because I've been sitting here thinking about that because, you know, what did that actually come from? Have they been abused? I know some of them, but I'll tell you this.
Dr. Emily Jones
I don't know. I'm not super well adept on that situation, but just for, like, your knowledge, I do think the draw to any kind of community like that is that typically those are kids that have been very, very hurt, and they find a place that they belong. Everything for me that I've learned in counseling comes back to people are looking for a connection. And for me, like, for us as Christians, like, we know what that. That calling and that longing in their hearts are. Right.
Co-host Hunter
Yeah.
Dr. Emily Jones
But people are. That's what everybody's seeking. That's what everybody's after. And a lot of times, kids that are struggling can find that community and can find that belonging in places that may not be the healthiest, but they belong somewhere. You know what I mean? And so, like, that's the draw is, like, kids want.
Co-host Hunter
The isolation is over. I found my. My people.
Dr. Emily Jones
Yes. Well, and the reality is, it's for kids that are different, you know, like, are they always accepted at school? Are they always accepted at church? And the reality is, is, like, no, because we don't do well with people that are different from us. You know what I'm saying? And so, like, if I'm gonna find. If I can find my people over here.
Co-host Hunter
That's so sad.
Dr. Emily Jones
It is.
Co-host Hunter
And, like, honestly, we failed them.
Dr. Emily Jones
I was just gonna say, more than anything, it's sad, like, to me, because I'm like, okay, so where have we missed. Like, where have we missed the mark of making sure that people feel known and connected and loved for who they are? Right? Because you can't. You can't draw people if you're not willing to go towards them.
Co-host Sai Angeli
So there's a good line right there. That's a Good one. Preach. That's a good one. Yeah. You don't.
Host Martin
I go to her Bible class sometimes.
Co-host Sai Angeli
Yeah, now she's done. Quit meddling.
Dr. Emily Jones
Super uncomfortable. Do you want to talk about John David in life group?
Host Martin
No.
Co-host Sai Angeli
Absolutely.
Co-host Hunter
I do not know because I'm hot with kids especially.
Co-host Sai Angeli
Love to.
Co-host Hunter
I always, always tell them, you know, because I'll ask them sometimes, are you loved? You know, look at me kind of funny. And I said, I got a point to it. I'm going to show you the point in a minute. Answer me. Are you? Do you think you're loved? And if. Depending on what they say, I said, well, hey, I fixed this change yet for you right now I love you and I don't even know you. And I said, then I got another one. Jesus loves you more than I do. I said, so, hey, don't you ever go anywhere and say, oh, nobody loves
Host Martin
me because uncle signed you.
Co-host Hunter
I said, because I told you I love you.
Co-host Sai Angeli
You can get a dollar of each
Co-host Hunter
right now. I got a shirt. Every time I'm in church, she comes, gives me a hug.
Dr. Emily Jones
I love that.
Co-host Hunter
Okay, she's like 13, 14 years old, but this started when it's like she was six.
Dr. Emily Jones
Yeah.
Co-host Hunter
Interest. Okay. Because they're walking around looking sad. And I'm looking and I'm thinking, isolation. I said, well, hey, come here a minute. I'll stop all this isolation crap, man.
Co-host Sai Angeli
This is the lowest my heart rate's ever been on this show.
Dr. Emily Jones
Really? Because mine's.
Co-host Sai Angeli
Well, no, no, I figured it. We were kind of like anti on each other. Yeah. You've got a calming presence about.
Host Martin
Well, the fact she's been very stressed about doing.
Co-host Sai Angeli
I know she's a hot one over here.
Co-host Hunter
Do more than. Okay. I know I make people laugh and I want that, okay, because laughter is good. But I want you, if you're out there and you're hurting, I want you to know that, hey, somewhere there you can find help.
Co-host Sai Angeli
Would it surprise you, Emily, that the number one, arguably the number one email that we get is relationship advice from us? From us. Would that surprise you?
Dr. Emily Jones
Yes.
Co-host Hunter
Why? Well, hey, hold on.
Dr. Emily Jones
And also no, because even just sitting here, I've listened a few times because I've heard that my husband has been talked about on this podcast once or twice. All good things.
Co-host Sai Angeli
Oh, it had to be you. I don't know.
Co-host Hunter
I know.
Co-host Sai Angeli
I don't know. The nicest guy on earth.
Host Martin
I can't tell a lot of stories because, you know, I. I leave out where and when and name sometimes because I have Been called to the principal's office before, but he is a principal. He was the guy whenever we had to do the camp out. And I just went to bed and he was on point with them kids. They weren't going nowhere. So I was like, I can go to bed.
Dr. Emily Jones
Super nice, super nice guy.
Host Martin
I thought he was going to hurt some kids. And he had my support.
Co-host Sai Angeli
So he's got a good bluff with the kid.
Dr. Emily Jones
No, it's not a bluff.
Co-host Sai Angeli
Oh, okay.
Dr. Emily Jones
But I think also why people probably come to you all for relationship. Y' all are very candid with one each one another. And like, that's the thing is, like, most people, people aren't going to be honest about what it is that they're thinking or won't say what's true.
Co-host Hunter
Here's the thing about. And that's because of. We're all Christians, you know, if you know that I'm a sinner and I've already told you I mess up, and then I had to turn and walk and look up and say, yeah, Lord, it's me again. Yeah, I know, I know. I done it again. I know. You know. Well, if I've told you, I'm already messed up.
Dr. Emily Jones
Yeah.
Co-host Hunter
Well, you're not going to be surprised.
Dr. Emily Jones
That's true.
Co-host Sai Angeli
Yeah.
Co-host Hunter
Yeah. And if. Hey, I tell people all the time, don't depend on me, I'll always let you down.
Co-host Sai Angeli
What would you say if I told you one of our pieces of advice was body slam her?
Host Martin
That went viral.
Dr. Emily Jones
I bet it did. Don't do that.
Co-host Sai Angeli
It worked.
Dr. Emily Jones
It's frowned upon.
Host Martin
We have a couple that got married after that advice.
Co-host Hunter
Emily. Well, no, no, no.
Host Martin
They were. They. He was afraid to ask her out. He asked us what she should do.
Co-host Sai Angeli
She always kept picking on him at work. And Godwin said, just turn around and body slam her. He said, you just walk up to her and body slam her.
Host Martin
And he did it.
Co-host Hunter
Yeah. Well, here's the.
Co-host Sai Angeli
Like a pallet of corn. What age group do you mostly see? Is there, like, preteen young adults? Because marriage and like, I be your
Host Martin
oldest patient if we signed him up.
Dr. Emily Jones
Well, not going to answer that, but.
Host Martin
Oh, yeah, you can't technically say, are
Co-host Hunter
you not going to hurt my feelings?
Co-host Sai Angeli
So, no, she can't say that legally.
Dr. Emily Jones
Yeah, I'll answer that. So the place that I work at, we serve 0 to 21. But when you're serving kids, like, in my opinion, a good children's counselor will work with the parents as well. And so typically, if you're working with a kid you're working with the parents. So I work with pretty much all ages.
Co-host Sai Angeli
I got you.
Dr. Emily Jones
But I do enjoy, like, marriage counseling is one of my faves. And then I enjoy parenting and trauma. I do. Emdr. Have you heard of that?
Co-host Hunter
Who?
Host Martin
What?
Dr. Emily Jones
I never heard of it. Emdr.
Co-host Hunter
Nbr.
Dr. Emily Jones
What do you mean?
Co-host Sai Angeli
It's so scary.
Dr. Emily Jones
Have you had it done?
Co-host Sai Angeli
Yes.
Dr. Emily Jones
What is it? Why did it scare you? Just, it changes a lot really quickly.
Co-host Sai Angeli
Very quickly.
Dr. Emily Jones
It's really cool. The first time I heard about it, I was like, that's not real.
Co-host Sai Angeli
Can we do it right now?
Co-host Hunter
Nbr. What does that stand for?
Host Martin
No.
Dr. Emily Jones
Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing.
Host Martin
What?
Dr. Emily Jones
And so it's actually used a lot with veterans to process the trauma that they experienced in all situations. But, you know, kids that are abused and neglected. So there's like, a statistic that says children in foster care have just as much trauma as combat veterans. And so EMDR can be used with kiddos as young as 6 years old if they're able to all the way up to whatever age.
Host Martin
And you look at their eyeballs.
Dr. Emily Jones
So you can do it with their eyes. Or I use buzzers that you hold in your hands. It's all. Do you really want to know?
Host Martin
Buzz? Yeah, I'm Googling it.
Co-host Sai Angeli
Oh, yeah, I'm interested.
Host Martin
I'm about to go buy some buzzer.
Co-host Sai Angeli
I've got a buzzer. It says gar.
Dr. Emily Jones
Gar.
Host Martin
Yeah, that's just a toy we have
Co-host Sai Angeli
a fan sent it to us.
Host Martin
Eye Movement Desensitization.
Dr. Emily Jones
And just put EMDR on there. There's a little YouTube website. Have you heard of. But they have.
Host Martin
Did you just make fun of me?
Dr. Emily Jones
No, I was trying to say there's a little YouTube website. And then I was embarrassed that I said that. You can cut that, Hunter.
Host Martin
Nope, leave it.
Co-host Sai Angeli
Hunter, now. Hey, any shot you.
Host Martin
We've got her comfortable now.
Co-host Sai Angeli
Any shot you take at him is fair game. And me, by the way.
Dr. Emily Jones
So basically, whenever you have trauma, like, trauma gets stuck in your brain and in your body. And so EMDR uses something called bilateral stimulation, which means you're going from one side to another. So if you use eye movements, you would follow my hand. If you hold tappers, it'll buzz from side to side. You can tap on somebody's knees. You can do any of those things. And while you do that, you're focusing on a difficult memory along with the beliefs that came out of that difficult memory. And we work to reprocess it because your brain gets stuck between the right and hemisphere. And that's why you have visceral reactions to different things that might happen. So say you heard a loud noise.
Co-host Sai Angeli
Okay.
Dr. Emily Jones
And there was somebody that was shot next to you a few years ago. And you're like, I know somebody wasn't shot, but why do I feel this way?
Co-host Hunter
And that that has been implanted in your brain, and you can't get it
Dr. Emily Jones
out, because when your brain learns that you're not safe, it teaches your body how to keep you safe. And so that's why a lot of people have big responses to things that we may think aren't that big of a deal, but they actually are. And so it's a. The first time I had EMDR done to me. Personal story, not a therapy story. I, like, walked into the room and could not speak about what had happened without, like, falling on the ground and crying. And I walked out of the room after it was over, and I was like, okay, that happened.
Co-host Hunter
Yeah.
Dr. Emily Jones
And so it doesn't, like. It doesn't erase memories. It doesn't do anything like that, but it just helps the traumatic memory move through your body in a constructive way to where you can handle it differently.
Co-host Hunter
That's why that day that I watched that movie and then Birthday to cry.
Dr. Emily Jones
Absolutely interesting.
Host Martin
My boss.
Co-host Sai Angeli
My boss had to send me home after I had it done.
Dr. Emily Jones
You probably shouldn't go back to work afterwards.
Co-host Sai Angeli
Yeah, no, it was. It was not a good time.
Dr. Emily Jones
Yeah, it's tough, and it can take a few sessions, but depending on how. How rough it is. But it's my favorite thing that I do.
Co-host Sai Angeli
Have I ever told y'? All. I'm glad that nothing like that's ever happened to me.
Host Martin
What?
Co-host Sai Angeli
Like, there's. I. It was weird because me and Brittany did counseling and, like, one of the questions, and she would tell me about your childhood, and I was like, I'm pretty freaking normal. Like, I mean, you know, with parents that stay together, like, the family unit stayed together, like, all these things. And so they were like, is there any. And I'm like, no, not really. I mean, other than having to, like, run stadiums and crap like that. I mean, I hate that. But I mean, I'm not saying. I'm saying life altering events. Yes. I'm saying life altering events that are so prevalent in today's world as divorce. You know, like, all those things that happen to such a high rate of people that get them to different responses and different things. Like, it was so normal. I was like. Or what we define as normal, right? Like, it was Just kind of.
Dr. Emily Jones
Would you not say that being on reality TV was a. Oh, that's weird. Abnormal.
Co-host Sai Angeli
Oh, yeah, that's weird.
Dr. Emily Jones
Yeah.
Co-host Sai Angeli
No, no, no, no. I'm not saying that. I was talking about we're not normal. No, I'm very well aware that my personality is very abnormal.
Dr. Emily Jones
Well, no, I'm just saying even stuff like that, like things that we would equate as like, oh, that was a good thing and it was fun. There can still be traumatic pieces to it.
Co-host Sai Angeli
Oh, absolutely.
Dr. Emily Jones
What I tell everybody is stress is stress.
Co-host Sai Angeli
Yeah.
Host Martin
I had a cool little feature this morning on Rocket Money because it said a large transaction was detected in your account. Oh, money coming in. It lets you know when it's coming in. It lets you know when it's going out. It is so convenient to have all of your money and find finances right there in one simple app.
Co-host Sai Angeli
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Host Martin
Keep you covered.
Co-host Sai Angeli
Look. And if you got a savings goal, you can set up automated savings in the app and let Rocket Money handle the rest. Rocket Money is a personal finance app that helps find and cancel unwanted subscriptions, monitors your spending and helps lower your bills so that you can grow your savings. Let Rocket Money help you reach your financial goals faster. Join@RocketMoney.com that's RocketMoney.com one more time. RocketMoney.com.
Co-host Hunter
You can help me in my poker game. Yeah, I know. I'm serious. For the simple reason it costs a lot of money. All she's doing when she's doing this with the patients.
Co-host Sai Angeli
Yeah.
Co-host Hunter
What they give her tails either by the way their eyes are the way their hand they start beside wanting to
Co-host Sai Angeli
know how to win.
Host Martin
So I'm about to hire Emily to go help him.
Co-host Sai Angeli
Sit behind me and tap on me when I.
Host Martin
This is really whatever is.
Co-host Sai Angeli
So you keep playing trash though you going to keep losing. That doesn't change. Isn't that doesn't.
Host Martin
She can't help your poker game.
Co-host Sai Angeli
Yeah.
Co-host Hunter
No, no. Because I've enjoyed this.
Co-host Sai Angeli
No, I don't know My life has been very abnormal from going even. I'm saying the response of their video out There got like 5 million views of. When we found out we didn't have one baby, like we were told the first time. And that was, in fact, two of them in. Yeah. I mean, I turned my phone off.
Co-host Hunter
I loved it. Been there. When he saw the other one stick his head up.
Co-host Sai Angeli
Oh, man, that was the wildest.
Co-host Hunter
Because they look at him.
Dr. Emily Jones
1.
Co-host Hunter
And then he said, wait a minute, what's that?
Co-host Sai Angeli
I know enough about transducers. There shouldn't be two of them. And mine's strictly from fishing. No, we had no idea. Oh, no, no, no, no, no. This was. This was ultrasound.
Host Martin
The way he said the other one popped out its head. It did sound like they were just.
Co-host Sai Angeli
No, they were. Then you go from one kid and like, why. Why is there a mirror image over here?
Co-host Hunter
What it was. He's playing peekaboo with that.
Co-host Sai Angeli
Yeah, yeah.
Host Martin
On the ultrasound.
Co-host Sai Angeli
On the ultrasound. Yeah. Early. I mean, early on somewhat. Not the first appointment.
Dr. Emily Jones
So like, even that, like, I think people think to do emdr, there has to be like, some kind of crazy, traumatic situation.
Co-host Sai Angeli
Yeah.
Dr. Emily Jones
Like, stress is stress and your body cannot distinguish. Like, oh, two babies. That's such a gift. I'm sure that was still stressful.
Co-host Sai Angeli
Oh, still is to this day.
Dr. Emily Jones
Even that kind of stuff are things that you can do.
Co-host Hunter
Emd. It was more than stressful. It was a shock to the system.
Co-host Sai Angeli
Yeah. I don't. I'd have loved to have been wearing this little heart rate deal when that happened.
Co-host Hunter
Yeah.
Co-host Sai Angeli
I'd like to have known what that spike was.
Host Martin
Martin was not ready for twins is the crux of the whole story.
Co-host Sai Angeli
Well, not when you've been told you're gonna have twins your whole life and you go. The first one, they're like, nah, it's just one. And you walk out and you're like, we beat it. We did it. Then you go back for that next one and it's like, hello.
Dr. Emily Jones
That would be. That would be rough.
Co-host Hunter
Yeah.
Co-host Sai Angeli
Just. Well, because my dad was a twin, everybody in my whole family said, you go fool around. You're the ones gonna have twins. It was like, I got to brag for like four weeks. Like, haha, no, it wasn't us. We did it. And then, you know, here we are. I wouldn't change it for the world now, by the way, Hunter's a twin.
Host Martin
Are you a twin? There should be like, twin therapy.
Dr. Emily Jones
What?
Co-host Sai Angeli
Where they hit each other with bat.
Host Martin
Well, I mean, Waylon's got to be weird. Waylon and Jack have another one of you.
Dr. Emily Jones
Not another one of you.
Host Martin
Yeah, but it's like another one of you. I would just think it'd be weird if I had a brother that was her sister that was my exact same age. I feel like I'd have issues.
Co-host Sai Angeli
There's two minutes difference between Jackson and Wayland.
Host Martin
I have issues, and my sister's four years older than me, and so does she.
Co-host Sai Angeli
That may come from something totally different, though. I don't know. That's interesting. Now. That's cool. Like, that's that.
Co-host Hunter
Well, she said she uses it with veterans. Okay. They've been cut through combat and all the stress that comes with it, everything. But you also do it with kids, which. And they are entirely different drama situations, so to speak.
Dr. Emily Jones
Yeah, it's some. I don't know, kids. Trauma is really hard. I think a lot of people are like, kids are okay. They're resilient and they are resilient, but also they're totally out of control of their lives. And so when traumatic things happen to kids, like, that's tough. And a lot of times they don't have the language or the brain development to be able to reason through some of the things that they've experienced. And so I do think that's why it's very important. Like even going back to what we talked about with kids on cell phones, the Internet, things like that, they're not equipped to make good choices. And that's not a slight on children. It's the biological reality of their prefrontal cortex, which is the emotional and behavioral management center of the brain, is not fully developed until you are 25 years old.
Co-host Hunter
Hunter. See, I made it.
Host Martin
He said, woo.
Co-host Hunter
My son lived next door. Okay. He's a vet. He was in combat. So he was talking to Philip, my buddy, about he saw a homeless guy and he wanted to know how to help him. And that's what Philip does for with kids. Well, he had an episode, one of his trauma episodes, and I literally had to help his wife. He bought he his mind shut his body off.
Dr. Emily Jones
Absolutely. We call that an amygdala.
Co-host Sai Angeli
What is in there too? Your amygdala?
Dr. Emily Jones
Yeah. Your amygdala is like the watchdog of the brain. So it's the thing that keeps you alive. And so if there is something that
Co-host Hunter
startles you, that threatens you. If it threatens you.
Co-host Sai Angeli
Yeah.
Co-host Hunter
Your body, your mind will shut your body off where it can't harm it might.
Dr. Emily Jones
Or it's fight, flight or freeze are the typical Responses whenever your amygdala is triggered.
Host Martin
What is yours, Martin?
Co-host Sai Angeli
It depends on if I have a weapon or not. That weapon makes it a lot easier to fight.
Host Martin
For some reason, a dog chased me the other day when I was on a walk and I kind of ran, but I also grabbed my headphones to hit it with it, so I guess I'm both.
Co-host Sai Angeli
I'd start with that size 13 on you.
Host Martin
Well, it came out of nowhere.
Co-host Sai Angeli
I get them headphones, but came out of nowhere.
Host Martin
So I jumped back and then I just turned around.
Co-host Hunter
You laid a very interesting life.
Dr. Emily Jones
Thank you.
Co-host Hunter
Go upstairs.
Dr. Emily Jones
Yeah, I mean, I don't think so.
Co-host Sai Angeli
Is freeze relatively new in that response? Because. Oh, well, in school, it was always just fight or flight. We didn't really cover freeze a whole lot.
Dr. Emily Jones
Flight or freeze. And the newest one that they're talking about now is Fawn.
Co-host Sai Angeli
Fawn?
Host Martin
What's that?
Dr. Emily Jones
Fawn is where, you know, I just went to a training, and they described it as a combination of all three. But it's like, how can I get you to love me instead of threaten me? So think about if a kid's getting bullied at school and they can't fight them, they can't run away because they go to that school and, you know, freezing doesn't do anything. Well, maybe I'll become like the bully. Maybe I'll make jokes about myself so he won't make. So, like, that's an example of Fawn. It may not look exactly like that, but, like, whenever you try and adapt and, like, love me, don't hurt me, love me.
Co-host Sai Angeli
Interesting.
Host Martin
Feel like I just got described.
Co-host Sai Angeli
Okay, you're a fawn.
Host Martin
Yeah,
Co-host Hunter
right. Oh, no, that goes along with the isolation part.
Co-host Sai Angeli
What happens when you. Dinner party fun.
Co-host Hunter
Because you know, everybody. Okay. Kids, adult, everybody's searching and wants to be accepted 100%. What advice can we give the audience?
Dr. Emily Jones
Can I interrupt real quick? Will you text Allison and see if she can get my kids from school if she can just hold them?
Co-host Hunter
Nope.
Host Martin
And that is staying in the episode.
Dr. Emily Jones
Oh, and then I'll answer.
Co-host Sai Angeli
Yeah, yeah. Because apparently this one's going to take a minute if we're going to miss car pickup.
Co-host Hunter
I know people out there hurting, and I don't want to leave them hanging.
Dr. Emily Jones
No, I appreciate that. I think number one is if you have a child at home, if you're a parent, what I would say to you that I've done in my own life is, number one, you have to do your work. And so I know I'm a therapist, but I really do think that therapy is for everybody. I grew up in a two parent household. I was incredibly loved. It was a Christian home. And we still had our problems, right?
Co-host Hunter
Like disagreements.
Dr. Emily Jones
Yeah, well, mental. Mental health issues. My dad was a good agoraphobic. Shut in. And so that was weird. Dad didn't go outside. You know what I mean?
Co-host Hunter
Your siblings, same kind of deal. Okay.
Dr. Emily Jones
And so even though I had all of those things going for me, the reality is, is like I'm still impacted by my childhood.
Co-host Sai Angeli
Oh. Yeah.
Dr. Emily Jones
And so I parent some of the same ways that maybe my parents did, which there are a lot of great ways I would. I was parented and they were still people. So there were some ways that I wanted to do things differently. But if you don't go do your work and counseling, it's going to be really hard to connect with the kid. That ticks you off or triggers you or makes you mad or scares you or whatever that may be.
Co-host Hunter
And this, this is for the kids. Hey, look, parents don't know it all.
Dr. Emily Jones
No.
Co-host Hunter
Okay. They had you and they had no idea what to do.
Co-host Sai Angeli
We all suck at it.
Co-host Hunter
Yeah, well.
Dr. Emily Jones
And that's what?
Co-host Sai Angeli
Because we've never been.
Co-host Hunter
No, no, but I'm just saying. Hey. I'm saying, hey, look, you're a kid, okay? Mom and dad are not know it alls.
Dr. Emily Jones
Yeah.
Co-host Hunter
They are just like you. They were put in the moment and hey, they're doing the best they can do with you.
Co-host Sai Angeli
That's why it's so important to raise them biblically, because, you know, then they know from an early age we're all flawed. Yeah, they're. Then, you know, everybody's flaws look a little different.
Dr. Emily Jones
Well, you look at your parents, though, and you think they don't do anything wrong.
Co-host Hunter
Yeah.
Co-host Sai Angeli
It's your superheroes, right?
Co-host Hunter
Here's some of the most important things I saw as a kid with my parents. My dad never walked out that door. And every once in a while he'd forget it, get in the car, and mom said, hey, you're forgetting something, dummy. It's that tact, you know, he'd get out, come back, kiss her goodbye.
Dr. Emily Jones
Term of endearment.
Co-host Hunter
Yeah, well, hey, that's important.
Dr. Emily Jones
It is.
Co-host Hunter
That was important for me to know. My dad and my mom loved each other more than anything else in this world. And they did the same for me.
Co-host Sai Angeli
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Co-host Hunter
When you look in the refrigerator, you don't see nothing you want to cook.
Co-host Sai Angeli
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Co-host Hunter
Hey, you've got a bunch of choices
Co-host Sai Angeli
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Host Martin
This is a new one I never heard of. Right here on the apple. Herb gravy. Grilled pork chop.
Co-host Sai Angeli
Yep.
Host Martin
I mean, it's a Yukon mash with green beans and sweet corn. It looks so good.
Co-host Sai Angeli
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Dr. Emily Jones
And so that's why, like, as the adult, you know, a lot of people are like these kids these days. Kids these days, kids are really a lot of times product of the environment that they're in. So, like, do your work as an individual. If you're married, go to marriage counseling. You know what I mean? Like, that's, that's one of the sweetest things that you can do for your family. So do that. But then also with your kids. I think one of the saddest things, and I fall into this a lot too, is I'm so easily distracted. And it, you know, it's the phone, it's the, it's the media, everything going
Co-host Hunter
on, the job, the kids, the husband,
Dr. Emily Jones
and we're tired, like, you know, and so intentional connection with your kids. Me and my husband's goal is number one to, to raise followers of Christ, but also kids that know that they have a place that they always belong and it's with us. And so you may not belong anywhere else in the world, but you will always belong home with us. But to do that, like, you have to build relationship and have connection.
Co-host Hunter
Oh, man.
Host Martin
Well, that was fun. I'm glad I just brought Emily on here to prove that I have smart friends. Oh, nobody would have believed.
Co-host Sai Angeli
I've thoroughly enjoyed it. I'd love to have you back anytime
Co-host Hunter
you want to come back, come back anytime.
Dr. Emily Jones
Thanks, guys.
Co-host Hunter
If this is one of those things that you can't, you're not going to cover it all. Yeah, it's a new.
Host Martin
She said she went to school like yesterday or something. Something you were talking about. You went back to some school.
Co-host Sai Angeli
Oh, that's the fawn. Yeah. The fight flight.
Co-host Hunter
Yeah.
Dr. Emily Jones
Oh, that was just a training.
Co-host Sai Angeli
Do you think they eventually made it start with an F? So now it's four Fs. I mean, is that kind of where they went?
Dr. Emily Jones
I don't think so. I don't think that was intentional because,
Co-host Sai Angeli
I mean, if you did like fight, flight, freeze, or mimic. I mean, it just doesn't roll off the tongue, you know? I mean, you kind of got a fortuitous.
Co-host Hunter
And this reminds me of. I couldn't tell you the verse, but David talking to the Lord said, how wonderfully I'm made.
Host Martin
Do you know that one?
Dr. Emily Jones
I do.
Co-host Hunter
God put this together. Okay. And he built in in it. It's part of the DNA in your body to do what we're talking about with Freeze Flight or fight or Fawn Martin's.
Host Martin
It's going to be like you got.
Co-host Hunter
When you. When you think about that, that's fine. That's like the Twilight Zone. All this stuff is going on and you have no idea this going on.
Host Martin
And that's what Emily does. She helps people realize what's going on.
Co-host Hunter
That's why I said a very interesting
Co-host Sai Angeli
life and give them a healthier way to process what's going on when it's going on.
Dr. Emily Jones
Yalls listeners. What y' all like, demographic? Who listens to y'?
Co-host Hunter
All?
Host Martin
You'd be surprised.
Co-host Sai Angeli
Yeah. Heavier female than you'd think.
Dr. Emily Jones
Okay.
Host Martin
They're not all that big.
Co-host Sai Angeli
Oh, wow.
Host Martin
That was a joke. That was a joke. That was a joke.
Co-host Sai Angeli
The problem with jokes is they all have shreds of truth.
Co-host Hunter
We're gonna let. You're laughing at that. What are we gonna leave the audience with?
Host Martin
No, we have. We have families that listen. Kids that listen.
Dr. Emily Jones
Yeah.
Host Martin
Surprising. There is a lot of old ladies that love us. Yeah, and we love you, but we do.
Co-host Sai Angeli
I mean, according to when we go out in public, there's a lot of kids aged 8 to 15 that listen to us too, because their parents let them because they know it's a pretty safe spot.
Dr. Emily Jones
Henry asked me this morning, will I be able to listen to this podcast? And I was like, yes, listen to this.
Co-host Sai Angeli
Yeah, we keep it. We keep it safe for the.
Host Martin
We got him.
Co-host Sai Angeli
It's mainly middle aged males, by the way.
Dr. Emily Jones
Yeah, mainly middle age.
Host Martin
But they just don't say anything.
Dr. Emily Jones
I hope it's. The reality is, like, people will listen and hear. Okay, Martin's been to counseling.
Co-host Sai Angeli
Oh, absolutely. You know, I've said on this that I'm so glad that we're in a time. I've said this before. I know I have. That where counseling is in, where therapy is cool, where therapy is not. Like, when I was growing up, when you heard of somebody go to therapy, that was almost shameful. Like, why are they in therapy? Like, what are you doing, you weirdo?
Dr. Emily Jones
Like, you know, in a lot of Christian cultures, teachers, it's still like, not the thing.
Co-host Sai Angeli
Yeah, I've.
Dr. Emily Jones
I've gotten a lot of flack from. I help out with fifth grade boys and they'll be like, I heard therapy's bad. And I'm like, oh, boy.
Co-host Hunter
Yeah, but.
Dr. Emily Jones
So that's just something I would say is like, but it's.
Co-host Sai Angeli
It's cool. Again, like, I'm not saying it's cool, but it's not. There's not a stigma associated with therapy now. Like, they're used to a social stigma as much.
Co-host Hunter
Well, well, that's like, that's like the statement, a man don't cry.
Dr. Emily Jones
Yes.
Co-host Hunter
That's sheer stupidity and ignorance.
Co-host Sai Angeli
Well, you got four of them in here that will.
Co-host Hunter
Hey, if I'm hurt, I've never seen Hunter.
Co-host Sai Angeli
You're in it. Oh, you. Did you see his socks?
Host Martin
Hunter did wear his therapy socks today. They say anxious.
Co-host Hunter
He's anxious and sexy.
Dr. Emily Jones
This is what I would say. You don't take your car to the mechanic when it breaks down. You take your car to the mechanic every three months, get your oil changed like you do normal maintenance. And I think I want people to know, like, there doesn't have to be some huge crisis. Crisis. There doesn't have to be some huge problem. But counseling can be a tool that the Lord uses in your life to bring healing that you didn't even know you needed. And it can be used to draw you closer. If you're a believer, it can be Used to draw you closer to the father. And so like, that's what I would encourage is like, if that's even something on your mind of like, should I go? John David today said I probably should go. Then go. We'll talk after this. Go.
Host Martin
And so look, whenever you had you, you tried to therapy Sam and he wouldn't let you therapy away. If you're ever like, this guy's an idiot.
Dr. Emily Jones
That was unintentional.
Host Martin
You can.
Dr. Emily Jones
It was just the open.
Host Martin
Do it on purpose.
Co-host Sai Angeli
Ethically. Could you work with him?
Dr. Emily Jones
No.
Co-host Sai Angeli
Okay.
Dr. Emily Jones
And I would.
Co-host Sai Angeli
You'd have to send him to somebody.
Dr. Emily Jones
I would send him to someone else.
Co-host Hunter
Here's what I'm thinking. Hey, if you're like, I don't trust people, what say?
Co-host Sai Angeli
I think that's something you could work through your trust issue.
Co-host Hunter
If your life sucks, if your life.
Host Martin
Hold on talking to me, you know,
Co-host Hunter
you're not happy with where you're at.
Host Martin
That's not true. I'm very happy.
Co-host Hunter
Well, hey, go to someone and talk it out.
Co-host Sai Angeli
A profession, get help. Yeah.
Co-host Hunter
Okay. Because you're miserable. You don't like what's going on. Are you just going to waddle in it and then let it finally defeat you?
Dr. Emily Jones
Yeah.
Co-host Hunter
Or you go, hey, it's okay that you need help.
Dr. Emily Jones
I would even say, if your life's good, go to counseling. Like, it doesn't.
Co-host Sai Angeli
Oh, absolutely.
Co-host Hunter
It don't have to be wrong.
Co-host Sai Angeli
There ain't nothing wrong with a tuna.
Dr. Emily Jones
Good one.
Co-host Sai Angeli
Yeah. And if you're a Christian, faith based too. Because there's all kinds of different. There's different stuff. The ones that, like the me and Brittany with marriage stuff was faith based counseling. Because there are some that aren't necessarily faith based. But that was important to us when choosing one that was that it was rooted in the word. Like, let's start there and then we'll work on whatever. But let's start in the word and figure out, you know, because the word's pretty solid, it'll fix most of these. Most issues that you're having can be found. The solution can be found in the Bible somewhere. And then, you know, if you got different responses you need to work through. That's a.
Dr. Emily Jones
Any counselor you go to should respect your beliefs. That's why I told John David coming on here today, I was like, it's my job. Whoever I sit with, like, what. What they believe in is what I want to tend to. It's what I want to pay attention to. And so, yes, if you're a Christian, find that if you're not a Christian, because I know you'll have people that probably aren't believers.
Co-host Hunter
I mean, that's part of your problem.
Dr. Emily Jones
Oh, but find someone who meets your values.
Co-host Hunter
No, no, I'm serious.
Co-host Sai Angeli
Well, that's like you talking about presentation part again.
Co-host Hunter
Hey, don't be. Don't be disconnected and isolated.
Co-host Sai Angeli
I'll find community. Community exists and find a way to
Co-host Hunter
join them and a connection. Find your people.
Co-host Sai Angeli
Yeah.
Co-host Hunter
They're out there. Okay. That way you're not isolated. That way you're not lonely.
Dr. Emily Jones
Yep.
Co-host Hunter
That way your life don't suck.
Host Martin
You know, Presentation.
Co-host Hunter
Get help and enjoy. Enjoy it. Life's too short to not to enjoy it, man.
Host Martin
Well, in with a Bible verse, do you have one that you love?
Dr. Emily Jones
You didn't prep me for that.
Host Martin
We never do.
Co-host Sai Angeli
We just see how we like to rapid fire. If there's one that's.
Host Martin
I bet I do have one on speed dial.
Dr. Emily Jones
Go ahead.
Host Martin
Psalm 139, 14. I praise you because I'm fearfully and wonderfully made. Your works are wonderful. I know that full well. That's what Sa was talking about earlier. So whatever you are out there, wherever you are, God made you, knitted you together, and you were fearfully and wonderfully made. And his works are wonderful. So you're wonderful. And if you don't think that you might need to go find somebody like Emily who will help you get there and see what God has created. Because it is amazing and you're amazing.
Co-host Sai Angeli
And if you keep reading, you will find out that you are loved by Uncle Sai Angeli.
Host Martin
Love, Emily. Thanks for being.
Co-host Hunter
That's an important knowledge.
Co-host Sai Angeli
Yeah.
Co-host Hunter
Okay.
Co-host Sai Angeli
Absolutely.
Co-host Hunter
That way you're not isolated. That way you're not disconnected. It's an important statement when somebody tells you, you're like when. I love it when somebody says, hey, you mind if I say a prayer for you? I said, are you kidding? You're going to take my name and say it in front of God Almighty himself? I would love it if you would
Co-host Sai Angeli
always say, because I need the prayers and you need to practice.
Co-host Hunter
You need to practice.
Co-host Sai Angeli
That's what I'm talking about.
Co-host Hunter
There you go. Hey, that's a win win for me. A win win for you.
Host Martin
It's a win, win, win, win, win.
Co-host Sai Angeli
But Emily, thank you.
Co-host Hunter
Yeah.
Co-host Sai Angeli
For coming on the ballroom. Yeah. We're done.
Host Martin
We're done.
Dr. Emily Jones
Oh, okay.
Co-host Hunter
Hey, we're trying to.
Host Martin
We take a minute. We don't know how it ends.
Co-host Hunter
I think over a little bit.
Hosts: Si Robertson, Justin Martin
Guest: Dr. Emily Jones, PhD, LMFT-S, LPC-S
Date: May 5, 2026
This special episode of the Duck Call Room centers on counseling, mental health, and parenting, featuring Dr. Emily Jones as the guest expert. Known for their trademark humor and heartfelt honesty, Si Robertson and Justin Martin invite Emily to answer questions about trauma, raising kids in a digital world, the evolving landscape of therapy, and what it means to truly connect with your family and community. The conversation blends laughter, personal stories, and surprising depth—making mental health approachable, especially for the podcast's multi-generational, faith-oriented audience.
On Trauma:
“Trauma gets stuck in your brain and in your body.” — Dr. Emily Jones (32:08)
On EMDR Therapy:
“I walked out of the room after it was over and I was like, okay, that happened.” — Dr. Emily Jones (33:26)
On Parenting:
"If you don’t do your own [therapeutic] work, it's going to be really hard to connect with the kid that ticks you off..." — Dr. Emily Jones (43:59)
On Connection:
“Kids are looking for connection… that’s what everybody’s after.” — Dr. Emily Jones (24:34)
On Technology and Kids:
“The longer you can delay [giving a kid a smartphone], the better.” — Dr. Emily Jones (19:37)
On Belonging:
“You may not belong anywhere else in the world, but you will always belong home with us.” — Dr. Emily Jones (48:52)
On Therapy Stigma:
“There doesn't have to be some huge crisis… but counseling can be a tool that the Lord uses in your life to bring healing…” — Dr. Emily Jones (52:54)
On Faith and Creation:
“I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made…” — Psalm 139:14, read by Martin (56:19)
Final Words:
“You are fearfully and wonderfully made. His works are wonderful. So you’re wonderful. And if you don’t think that—you might need to go find somebody like Emily who’ll help you get there.” — Martin, (56:19)
For parents, families, and anyone seeking hope and humor in hard times, this episode is a resource and an invitation to seek connection, counseling, and community—delivered with the Duck Call Room’s signature warmth.