Uncle Si's Goofy Ritual Still Keeps His Marriage Playful

Summary

Duck Call Room Episode Summary

Episode: "Uncle Si's Goofy Ritual Still Keeps His Marriage Playful"

Hosts: Si Robertson, Justin Martin, Phil Robertson, Jase Robertson, Johnny D, John Godwin, Jay Stone, Phillip McMillan, Jacob Mayo
Date: December 2, 2025

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Overview

This episode brings together the duck-calling Robertson crew for a lively discussion packed with their signature storytelling, hunting tales, southern wit, and playful banter. The main theme orbits around duck season opening adventures, marriage antics (notably Uncle Si's goofy ritual to keep things playful), Thanksgiving food traditions, and some classic down-home wisdom about family life. Peppered throughout are memorable quips about underwear, cooking tips, legendary hunts, and plenty of laughter about everyday mishaps.

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Duck Season Is Here!

• Opening duck season provides ample story material as the crew swaps tales of their first hunts of the season.
  • Phil reports, “We killed seven Woodies...all the Robertson crew,” (01:21)
  • Jase and Johnny D probe for who performed best and joke about getting out-hunted by the “Duck Boys.”
  • The crew discusses their respective hunting spots (Pine Pond, the Dog Blind), successful and failed hunts, and the age-old “blind location” debate.
  • “If you get where they go, that’s when you kill them.” — Phil Robertson (10:12)
• Milestone: Jase shot a rare banded woody on opening day, which quickly becomes a highlight.

2. Duck Hunting Rituals & Parenting

• Si discusses his “sponsor” role in sending others out to hunt while he sits out, emphasizing passing down hunting traditions.
  • Si jokes about being the “title sponsor” of his son and grandson’s hunt (07:00).
• The group reflects on how the next generation hunts differently and the importance of adapting traditions.
  • “I go to football coach mode whenever I’m duck hunting. Everybody there’s got a job. Do your job!” — Si Robertson (08:34)

3. Hunting Mishaps and Rules

• Entertaining retelling about getting “banned” from hunts for breaking protocol (like shooting too early), highlighting traditions and family dynamics.
  • Johnny D: “35 years later, I still ain’t been back with him. I said, Si, we’re best friends. Can’t you get me in? He said, no, son, you’re banned for life.” (14:00)
• Jokes about waiting too long or firing too fast at ducks, and the sheer joy (and occasional frustration) of a successful hunt.
• The crew also touches on wildlife oddities—escaped monkeys, black panther sightings, and the question: “What happens if you shoot an animal with no rules?” (17:48)
  • Phil: “I called [the warden] up and asked him, can I shoot a black panther? And he said, no...why can’t I shoot my imagination?” (18:06)

4. Thanksgiving Traditions: Food, Cooking, and Family Chaos

• Extended, hilarious talk about deep-frying turkeys, the best parts to eat, dressing vs. stuffing, and legendary family recipes.
• Si brags about his smoked turkey (25:24), endorses the turkey wing as the best part (26:48), and the group analyzes where all the turkey thighs and wings go.
• Cornbread dressing is a fierce point of pride for the Robertsons, with Phil vowing: “This is gonna be the finest I’ve ever made.” (28:00)
• Sage is both a flavoring and a running gag: “If that’s how you like it, do it,” Si counsels Phil, who promises to “lighten it up for the people.” (30:10)
• They contemplate producing cooking reels: “Si making Instagram and Facebook reels of him cooking. He could be famous one day now.” — Jase (31:05)

5. Marriage Playfulness: Si’s Goofy Ritual

• The episode’s namesake moment: Si describes his playful marital ritual of intentionally (and sometimes unintentionally) wearing underwear with holes, which his wife, Brittany, will spot and forcibly remove—a running inside joke to keep their marriage light.
  • “Britney, if you listen, I much more support this method than going through my drawer...Just rip ‘em off!” — Si (33:16)
  • Phil adds his own marital anecdotes: “Next thing I know is I’m being pulled backwards...she done hooked me with her finger and hey, here we go.” (36:16)
• The discussion of holey underwear turns into a broader laugh about the rituals and small antics that keep long marriages playful.

6. Wearing & Losing Underwear: Generational & Gender Takes

• Extended riff on underwear buying, sizing, and the universal annoyance of losing favorite pairs to “spousal interventions.”
  • “Can we standardize sizing?” — Si (31:36)
  • “She will go in and when I ain’t paying attention and get the ones with holes and throw them out. I ain’t a big fan of that.” — Si (33:03)
• This playful segment ties back to the theme of keeping love and laughter alive in married life (and what counts as a ‘marriage ritual’ in Robertson households).

7. Cooking Tips & the Science (and Dangers) of Deviled Eggs

• Phil reveals his secret dressing techniques—exactly measured sage, systematic mixing—and the wisdom that “positivity” is his real secret ingredient.
  • “I could eat the whole thing myself.” — Phil (49:11)
• The group analyzes the mysterious digestive impact of deviled eggs, offering both scientific curiosity and comic resignation.
  • “What is it about a deviled egg makes you rotten?” — Si (42:48)
  • “It's a phenomenon.” — Phil (43:31)

8. Family Gatherings, Holiday Schedules, and Food Strategies

• Discussion about Thanksgiving scheduling, the best time to eat, attending multiple feasts, and which dishes are must-haves (duck, dressing, deviled eggs).
  • “There's about three things I really enjoy about Thanksgiving: Duck and dressing, then the deviled eggs.” — Phil (42:23)
  • Deviled eggs (aka “rooster rockets”) receive special attention for their taste—and their after-effects.

9. Classic Pop Culture & Movie References

• Phil and the crew reminisce about “Cool Hand Luke,” comparing Phil’s capacity for eating dressing to the famous 50-egg scene.
  • “I could eat every bit of it myself.” — Phil (49:39)

10. Birth in a Buc-ee's Parking Lot (Listener Email)

• The listener email recounts a child being born at a Buc-ee’s, sparking more comedic riffs on auspicious life beginnings and small-town news cycles (51:08).
  • “Life doesn’t get better than starting it at Buc-ee’s.” — Jase
• This segues to discussions about family traditions in Springfield, Missouri, and local attractions like the aquarium.

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Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments (with Timestamps)

• “I go to football coach mode whenever I’m duck hunting. Everybody there’s got a job. Do your job!” — Si Robertson (08:34)
• “If you get where they go, that’s when you kill them.” — Phil Robertson (10:12)
• “35 years later, I still ain’t been back with him…you’re banned for life.” — Johnny D and Si (14:00)
• “Can I shoot a black panther?...Why can’t I shoot my imagination?” — Phil Robertson (18:06)
• “Next thing I know is I’m being pulled backwards. She done hooked me with her finger and...here we go.” — Phil Robertson (36:16)
• “Britney, if you listen, I much more support this method than going through my drawer.” — Si Robertson (33:16)
• “This is gonna be the finest I’ve ever made.” — Phil Robertson (28:00)
• “I could eat every bit of it myself.” — Phil Robertson (49:39)
• "What is it about a deviled egg makes you rotten?" — Si Robertson (42:48)
• "It's a phenomenon." — Phil Robertson (43:31)
• “Life doesn’t get better than starting it at Buc-ee’s.” — Jase Robertson (51:40)
• “Positivity. Bible verse.” — Jase Robertson (49:13)
• “Cling to it...cause be positive.” — Si & Jase Robertson, referencing Philippians 4:8 (56:28)

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Timestamps for Important Segments

• Duck season stories & hunting tallies: 01:02–16:00
• Generational hunting wisdom & rituals: 06:00–10:25
• Marriage ritual stories (“holey underwear”): 33:00–38:00
• Thanksgiving food, turkey and dressing discussions: 23:43–32:00, 47:02–49:39
• Deviled eggs, food science, and family feasts: 42:19–44:01
• Listener email (Buc-ee’s baby) & pop culture: 50:45–52:53
• Closing reflection & positive message: 56:09

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Tone & Style

The episode is saturated with affectionate ribbing, infectious laughter, and classic Duck Dynasty-style storytelling. Conversations move organically between hunting exploits, culinary wisdom, playful marital confessions, and philosophical musings on tradition and positivity.

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Conclusion & Reflection

This episode is a warm, humorous celebration of the outdoors, family, and enduring marriage—served with a heapin’ helpin’ of Southern wit and wisdom. The underlying message: cherish tradition, keep laughter alive in your family, savor the simple delights of a hunt (or a deviled egg), and always keep things a little playful—even if that means embracing the goofy rituals that only make sense to you and your spouse.

Closing Bible encouragement:
“Finally, brothers and sisters, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things and do it.” — Jase quoting Philippians 4:8 (56:09)

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For anyone who missed it:
Expect classic hunting tales, plenty of kitchen talk, and honest, hilarious stories about what keeps the Robertsons’ families loving (and laughing) after all these years.

Transcript

[Phil Robertson]

This episode is brought to you by Jack Daniels. Jack Daniels and music are made for each other.

[Si Robertson]

They share a rhythm in the craft.

[Phil Robertson]

Of making something timeless while being a.

[Jase Robertson]

Part of legendary nights.

[Phil Robertson]

From backyard jams to sold out arenas.

[Si Robertson]

There'S a song in every toast.

[Phil Robertson]

Please drink responsibly.

[Jase Robertson]

Responsibility.org, jack Daniels and Old no.

[Si Robertson]

7 are registered trademarks.

[Phil Robertson]

Tennessee Whiskey, 40% alcohol by volume. Jack Daniel Distillery, Lynchburg, Tennessee.

[Jase Robertson]

Coca Cola for the big, for the small, the short and the tall.

[Phil Robertson]

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[Si Robertson]

All right. Welcome back to the duck call room, ladies and gentlemen. We are back. It is duck season, finally. And it's here. Yeah.

[Jase Robertson]

Philip, have you been?

[Johnny 'Johnny D' Robertson]

It's practically. No, I have not been. Johnny D. I was gonna go with you opening day.

[Jase Robertson]

Haven't been either. You went. You've only been once.

[Phil Robertson]

Oh, I've been once.

[Jase Robertson]

How was it?

[Phil Robertson]

It was. We killed seven Woodies.

[Johnny 'Johnny D' Robertson]

I saw that. Now you. It was you. And who was it? Who was we?

[Phil Robertson]

Me, Al, J. It was all the Robson crew.

[Johnny 'Johnny D' Robertson]

I can't believe you got Jeff there. And Willie.

[Phil Robertson]

Except one who wasn't here.

[Johnny 'Johnny D' Robertson]

Yeah.

[Si Robertson]

Oh, I bet he was there.

[Phil Robertson]

He probably killed more than we did. I bet he was in heaven.

[Si Robertson]

I bet he was there saying, boy, I don't know if I'd have done it like that.

[Phil Robertson]

Did he really do it that way? Wrong.

[Si Robertson]

We should rewrite that song.

[Phil Robertson]

Really do it that way.

[Si Robertson]

Guys, I don't think Phil did.

[Phil Robertson]

I don't think he did.

[Si Robertson]

We should write our own parody of that. That. That'd be a good one.

[Jase Robertson]

I don't know what song we're talking about.

[Phil Robertson]

And the Duck boys, we kill seven and the duck boys kill 21. Oh, it was 20. It was seven of them. They killed three woodies piece.

[Jase Robertson]

Where at? So everybody down there.

[Phil Robertson]

We call it the Pine Pond because it's a. It's a pond in the middle of the pine ticket.

[Si Robertson]

There you go.

[Johnny 'Johnny D' Robertson]

Is this out at Yalls Land out there? I got you.

[Si Robertson]

There you go. Where'd y' all hunt?

[Phil Robertson]

We hunted on the dog that was all singing the blues. And I said, hey, look, don't be negative on me. The Lord will provide. We'll have some duck. That's that time. Here come eight or ten. They saw us flared.

[Jase Robertson]

So you only killed seven? Where's this story.

[Phil Robertson]

There's four showed up and they come. He's the only robber decoys. We killed three of them.

[Si Robertson]

You're the only Robertson to ever admit a duck saw you. Congratulations. Hey, that is.

[Johnny 'Johnny D' Robertson]

What did they flare off of Willie's hocus, I think.

[Phil Robertson]

No, no, I think they seen the cameraman because he was out outside the blind.

[Si Robertson]

No, never mind. We're back to being a robbers.

[Phil Robertson]

What I'm saying, Jason him really brushed the blind.

[Johnny 'Johnny D' Robertson]

Name shifter.

[Phil Robertson]

Oh, they didn't see the guys in the blind.

[Si Robertson]

Oh, I got you.

[Phil Robertson]

They all had. They all had face paint on except me. I didn't put it on.

[Jase Robertson]

Yeah, you got to put face paint on.

[Phil Robertson]

Hey, I'm invisible anyway.

[Si Robertson]

Yeah, that's why I was wondering how you flared a duck.

[Phil Robertson]

You thought, hey, but look on dog. Wow. When there's no water anywhere else, they will come like the lake is bone dry. So our big hole ain't got water. We're on the dog. And it's not a whole lot of water, but it's enough. So when the boys cranked up the duck boys cranked up on the pine.

[Johnny 'Johnny D' Robertson]

Pond, y' all could hear them.

[Phil Robertson]

Well, we got some of their stragglers.

[Si Robertson]

Survivors.

[Phil Robertson]

Yep. And we got seven. So. Hey, it was a good duck hunt.

[Si Robertson]

So y' all got beat 3 to 1 by the young boys.

[Phil Robertson]

It happens.

[Jase Robertson]

But look at how big size smiles in the photograph.

[Johnny 'Johnny D' Robertson]

I love it. Sigh.

[Jase Robertson]

Good job Willie's not smiling.

[Johnny 'Johnny D' Robertson]

What is size got the best smile.

[Phil Robertson]

Well, hey, Will, he actually hunted till about 8:30, which is. Hey, that's a first.

[Jase Robertson]

Jeb's headed to the movies after this.

[Phil Robertson]

Yeah, but he had to go to Louisiana Tech for something.

[Si Robertson]

No, I don't look good.

[Phil Robertson]

That man's too. He's too busy.

[Jase Robertson]

Yeah, Al's in like a model pose.

[Johnny 'Johnny D' Robertson]

Oh, yeah.

[Phil Robertson]

Al's looking good in his vest.

[Johnny 'Johnny D' Robertson]

The new improved Al. Because he's looking good.

[Jase Robertson]

Jace looks concerned. And then stone and tire. The ones having.

[Johnny 'Johnny D' Robertson]

They're having fun.

[Phil Robertson]

No, Jace was very happy because. Because out of one of them four that come in, Jace missed him the first shot. And then he was in front of the cameraman. He killed him. Well, guess what? Banded woody.

[Jase Robertson]

Banded first day.

[Phil Robertson]

You know, the banded Woody.

[Si Robertson]

There you go.

[Phil Robertson]

So, hey, that's. Yo. Jace was fired up by that.

[Si Robertson]

We shot the elusive banded gad wall yesterday.

[Phil Robertson]

Gadball band.

[Si Robertson]

Ain't that something?

[Phil Robertson]

I don't think I've ever killed a gal. The band on his neck.

[Si Robertson]

I know I haven't. And I still. And I Still haven't.

[Phil Robertson]

I have killed a lot of woodies with it on it.

[Si Robertson]

Yeah.

[Phil Robertson]

And the most of them was from Indiana. Yeah, I've killed the Indiana boys. They raised a lot of woodies up there.

[Si Robertson]

Illinois.

[Phil Robertson]

And they put bands on.

[Si Robertson]

There you go.

[Phil Robertson]

Cause what. Phil probably has 8 or 10. Indiana.

[Jase Robertson]

Just from Indiana.

[Si Robertson]

Yeah. The Jones family does it.

[Jase Robertson]

The Joneses. Hard to keep up with them.

[Johnny 'Johnny D' Robertson]

That was too easy.

[Jase Robertson]

Thank you. Now, just softballs today.

[Phil Robertson]

Bolloughs. I killed them on green wing teal.

[Si Robertson]

Pintails, pin tail. Yep, yep, that's pretty. I ain't killed a teal, but yeah, Mallard.

[Phil Robertson]

I kill one on a green band with a green wing teal.

[Si Robertson]

Oh, but yeah, that's it. Yeah, I'm tired. These. This first little stretch is always the hardest, like getting used to it.

[Johnny 'Johnny D' Robertson]

I saw your whole. Well, I saw Scott and Marsha and their kids on the way in here and they're going hunting with y'.

[Phil Robertson]

All. Well, they're going hunt.

[Johnny 'Johnny D' Robertson]

Well, that's exciting. Wait, what?

[Phil Robertson]

They're going on. I ain't going.

[Johnny 'Johnny D' Robertson]

But why?

[Phil Robertson]

Hey, no, I'm gonna let Jim do it.

[Johnny 'Johnny D' Robertson]

I mean, you're gonna be there, you're just not gonna. Oh, no, you.

[Phil Robertson]

I ain't going.

[Johnny 'Johnny D' Robertson]

What are you.

[Phil Robertson]

Like I told him, hey, I'm sending you to duck hunt. You go out, get God's creation, kill someone's a duck, and then you come.

[Johnny 'Johnny D' Robertson]

Back, tell me, who are they going with?

[Phil Robertson]

Here's some of his friends.

[Si Robertson]

Yeah, they're going with my, I believe 15. Yeah, they're going with my buddies Gordon Markle and Matt Laird's.

[Jase Robertson]

So Maddie Laird, quarterback.

[Phil Robertson]

That way I get me some green wing teal to cook for my next batch of deer dressing.

[Johnny 'Johnny D' Robertson]

Wait, is that going to happen? Probably.

[Si Robertson]

Huh.

[Johnny 'Johnny D' Robertson]

They're going to kill some. You think?

[Phil Robertson]

Oh, yeah, they'll be.

[Si Robertson]

They'll. They'll be fine. Yeah.

[Jase Robertson]

Hold on. Why aren't you going?

[Phil Robertson]

Because I don't want to.

[Johnny 'Johnny D' Robertson]

You're not afraid?

[Si Robertson]

I said. He. I said, you know, I'm used to being sponsored, but for this one, I'm going to be the sponsor size, the title sponsor of his son and grandson's duck hunt.

[Johnny 'Johnny D' Robertson]

Well, that's exciting.

[Si Robertson]

Yeah.

[Phil Robertson]

I told Mark when I said, hey, I need you to do me a favor. And he said, okay, yeah, I gotta cover. And then I come back a couple days later and I said, I didn't really. I don't really know what I really asked you. Yeah, I said, now that I've had time to think about it, I'm out.

[Si Robertson]

Because when I tried to book it for him with them, they were like, how many people? I said, anywhere from four to eight. Eight, I don't know. So I said, it's a very moving target right now.

[Phil Robertson]

This is fluid. You got to be fluid here, boys.

[Si Robertson]

They said, yeah. They said, well, we'll make room. We'll figure it out for you. For you. So, yeah, I keep a good relationship.

[Phil Robertson]

I didn't. I didn't think. I said, wait a minute. My grandsons shotguns in their hands.

[Johnny 'Johnny D' Robertson]

And. And these you have called the destructo.

[Phil Robertson]

Oh, yeah. And that's why when I told Martin, I said, I might. I better check with you where you really understand what you're getting into. And he said, oh, no, I'm sending somebody else to help that Martin's not going either. Okay, hold on. Yeah, hold on.

[Johnny 'Johnny D' Robertson]

I ain't going. Martin ain't going.

[Phil Robertson]

No, because that's what I told. That's what I told him. I said, hey, look, when y' all get down there, you do what them boys tell you to do.

[Si Robertson]

They're good. And that's what these guys do for a living. That's not what I do.

[Johnny 'Johnny D' Robertson]

Right?

[Si Robertson]

Yeah.

[Johnny 'Johnny D' Robertson]

And. And they're older now. Si. They're not young like they used to.

[Si Robertson]

Because you can ask anybody that goes, yeah, but I am an equal.

[Phil Robertson]

My grandson.

[Si Robertson]

I'm an equal opportunity. Not. I'm not going to say yeller.

[Phil Robertson]

No. I don't want nothing.

[Si Robertson]

Like, I go to football coach mode whenever I'm duck hunting. Like, everybody there's got a job. Do your job. If you don't do your job, I'm about to get on you like I'm about to blow the whistle. But do some squat jumps. Do something like, you know, Bill said.

[Jase Robertson]

That'S for me and you.

[Si Robertson]

Yeah. I just don't. I don't do well because I try to anymore. On all of our stuff, you kind of got to be mistake free to have a good hunt. So, like, when you. You like where they hunt, you can get away with a lot of stuff. They just. They're in a better, better spot. So it's a. More ducks. More. More ducks fly over them. Therefore, they get more opportunities. So, you know, we're a little off the beaten path for that kind of stuff, so.

[Phil Robertson]

And that makes a big difference.

[Si Robertson]

Yeah. Yeah. I mean, if you can have, you know, John, ducks fly by you a day, you can find 20 or 30 dumb ones generally.

[Phil Robertson]

So, you know, John and Winx, for years there, we went up there, went hunting with him. And all day long, just ducks. It's coming over and they're going down there. Like young Phil said, well, you know, Johnny asked. Phil says, well, what would you do? He said, johnny, I've been sitting here all day. He said, this blind's in the wrong place. He said, dig this sucker up and put it right down there where they're like.

[Si Robertson]

Yeah, put it where they want to be.

[Phil Robertson]

That's how Phil would have.

[Jase Robertson]

Phil would have put another blind over there.

[Phil Robertson]

No, no.

[Si Robertson]

Yeah, but Phil, later in life would have just built another one.

[Phil Robertson]

Oh, no. Yeah, then he did it, you know, and then the next time we hunted over there, it was a blowout. Yeah, we burned that gun barrel off.

[Si Robertson]

Yeah. Generally, if you have enough fly over.

[Phil Robertson]

You, if you get where they go, that's when you kill them.

[Jase Robertson]

That's how you kill ducks. You go where the ducks are.

[Si Robertson]

But I did have a kid this weekend, he killed his first duck. So that was fun.

[Phil Robertson]

Well, that's the most fun. On their first trip, Clay.

[Si Robertson]

Clay had. My buddy Clay had invited some guests from. Was Clay somehow tied into the Chosen? I don't know. They work for them. They're not like on the show, but they work for the show.

[Phil Robertson]

Take my advice and do what I told him to do when I. Last time I hunted with him.

[Si Robertson]

I don't even know what that was.

[Phil Robertson]

He needs to get another shotgun to use. No, that piece of junk. He got.

[Jase Robertson]

So rude about people's equipment.

[Phil Robertson]

Well, no. Hey, I'm watching him shoot cripples.

[Si Robertson]

Oh, yeah, he was shooting same gun I shooting this morning. But you know, we ain't been real.

[Phil Robertson]

I told him I was. Hey, you need to get your real shotgun.

[Jase Robertson]

Hey, look, if my son Carter taught me anything, it's that the American Revolution didn't just happen overnight. The colonists didn't wake up one morning in 1776 and say, hey, let's just.

[Phil Robertson]

Sign a piece of paper.

[Jase Robertson]

Break away from Britain. No. There were 150 years of history that my son knows and I don't that led up to that moment.

[Si Robertson]

You know the good thing, don't you? You know where you can find out about that history?

[Jase Robertson]

A little Hillsdale. Then when Carter's quizzing me, I can feel smart again.

[Si Robertson]

Hillsdale College does have a brand new free miniseries on colonial America that'll get you all caught up. You'll learn about the religious, political, cultural and economic ideas that shaped early American life. Learn why liberty, especially religious liberty, insp settlers. How they organize local governments. And why virtue has always fueled peace. And prosperity. This series focuses on the American character that made the revolution possible and why it's vital to remember today. And if you're like, I know all that, or I think I know all that, guess what? Hills has got more than 40 other free courses. That's right, free courses from CS Lewis and Genesis to the Roman Republic and the Constitution. And guess what? They're self paced. Take them at your own pace. You don't have to take tests. You don't have to do none of that. You just take them. I highly recommend ancient Christianity because been a lot of iterations of it through the years. But go right now to Hillsdale Edu slash to enroll. There's no cost and it's easy to get started. That's Hillsdale Edu slash to enroll for free. Hillsdale Edu.

[Johnny 'Johnny D' Robertson]

Johnny Day. I'm going in January in Arkansas with Elliot and Kel Motors. Me and Sigh and J. Stone are going to go duck hunting down in Arkansas.

[Si Robertson]

That's good.

[Phil Robertson]

His grand wearing tail. Shoot.

[Jase Robertson]

You're. You're good to go.

[Johnny 'Johnny D' Robertson]

You're good to go. I just said I get. I get to go.

[Phil Robertson]

It's a hot.

[Jase Robertson]

Oh, hawking's hard.

[Phil Robertson]

He may or may not get banned from this one.

[Si Robertson]

Please.

[Jase Robertson]

I don't think you'll get banned anymore.

[Johnny 'Johnny D' Robertson]

No, I'm not. I shouldn't have got banned the first time. Psy acts like he was there. I'm telling you, I jumped up. Shot three.

[Jase Robertson]

They all fell and you got banned.

[Johnny 'Johnny D' Robertson]

I got three ducks down.

[Phil Robertson]

Yeah, he got a feather.

[Jase Robertson]

He ain't cut a feather.

[Phil Robertson]

Cut up other. He just made a loud three bangs.

[Si Robertson]

Please shoot. Early this time.

[Jase Robertson]

Please. Well, what really happened?

[Phil Robertson]

That's not really happened.

[Johnny 'Johnny D' Robertson]

This is really true. We're all sitting there. This is. This is the first time. He wasn't there, I promise.

[Phil Robertson]

Yeah, I was there.

[Johnny 'Johnny D' Robertson]

So Jay says. So Jay says, all right, everybody be real easy, you know? And the ducks are flying and I see them and they come over and they get right in front of the blind. I mean, all I know from growing up is, I mean, you shoot them. We're not ever good enough to make them land or get them close. So I jump up, boom, boom, boom. And three of them just.

[Phil Robertson]

I'll splash.

[Johnny 'Johnny D' Robertson]

And it gets real quiet and I'm turning around trying to high five somebody, and everybody's like.

[Jase Robertson]

Everybody's just staring at you.

[Johnny 'Johnny D' Robertson]

No, but they'll. They're looking down like. And Jason says, hey, Phil. Nobody moves until dad says, cut them. And 35 years later, I still ain't been back with him. I said, si, we're best friends. Can't you get me in? He said, no, son. You banned for life. Somebody had to be banned for life. But before Phil passed away, we had a podcast here. And when we walked out, I said, phil, I could go back anytime I wanted to. Couldn't you? He was like, that's right, Mac. Anytime you want. So it was more.

[Phil Robertson]

He just told him that you polite.

[Jase Robertson]

Yeah, he wasn't. They were going to be full that day.

[Phil Robertson]

You were never going back in the blast.

[Jase Robertson]

Yeah, I got in trouble for the opposite one time.

[Johnny 'Johnny D' Robertson]

What?

[Jase Robertson]

Gimber was doing something, and there was like four of us, and I was on the end, so I was probably supposed to call it, but I was waiting for Gimber to call it, and There was about 80 teal in the decoys. And Gimber said, man, I looked up and thought, this is going to be awesome. And then y' all just sat there until they flew away. I said, I was waiting on you.

[Si Robertson]

Yeah, I've been guilty of that. Sometimes you just get caught up in watching it all.

[Phil Robertson]

Yeah.

[Si Robertson]

And then I look back and I.

[Phil Robertson]

Said, the beauty of it.

[Si Robertson]

Yeah. Probably should have shot.

[Jase Robertson]

Probably should have just unloaded there.

[Si Robertson]

But you get caught up in it, you know, it's. That's what's fun about it, man. It's. It's a lot of fun.

[Johnny 'Johnny D' Robertson]

It's hard to stop shooting them woodies when they're flying. I mean, you need to stop, but, you know, it's just hard for people.

[Si Robertson]

After three of them. Yeah. It's time to call it quit. So y' all killed seven opening day. How many did you kill? Seven. Three.

[Phil Robertson]

Give them all three.

[Si Robertson]

There you go. Who killed the rest of them? Well, JC said a couple.

[Phil Robertson]

Stone probably killed a couple.

[Si Robertson]

Yeah. So there's seven. Three. Four.

[Johnny 'Johnny D' Robertson]

Four.

[Si Robertson]

Yeah. Three. Two. Two. Four.

[Jase Robertson]

Willie didn't kill anything, huh?

[Johnny 'Johnny D' Robertson]

One. What?

[Phil Robertson]

Really ain't killed nothing. Then he said, well, I got. I gotta leave here, boys, at 8:30. He said, I got to do something at Tech, man. I'm going deer hunting. Texas. And I said, well? He said, well, I didn't figure it would kill nothing. And I said, yeah, you're negative. Hey, the Lord will provide, son. And I said, now, when you go to Texas, guess what? He said, you want to put some money on what I'm going to kill in Texas? I said, yeah, I put a penny on it that you don't kill doodly squat.

[Si Robertson]

Yeah. Better. Hard snickers.

[Phil Robertson]

Yeah.

[Jase Robertson]

What do you kill in Texas?

[Phil Robertson]

And Then he says, that may happen. I said, hey, I'm predicting this happen. I give you a penny when you come back, say, I didn't cut a feather. Or a hair.

[Jase Robertson]

Or a hair.

[Si Robertson]

No. Or hair. The hair.

[Johnny 'Johnny D' Robertson]

The hair.

[Si Robertson]

Oh, man alive. It's just. I don't know. It's just fun.

[Phil Robertson]

It happens. It happens even in high fences. You sit there and you just don't get a shot at nothing.

[Jase Robertson]

Speaking of shooting stuff.

[Si Robertson]

Go ahead.

[Jase Robertson]

Y' all remember how we talked about them monkeys that escaped from that truck?

[Phil Robertson]

Oh, I knew. Redneck. We'll get them, boys a redneck.

[Jase Robertson]

Got her one.

[Phil Robertson]

I got him one.

[Jase Robertson]

Hold on.

[Johnny 'Johnny D' Robertson]

I gotta find.

[Phil Robertson]

He mounted that sucker. You.

[Jase Robertson]

I sent it to Martin.

[Phil Robertson]

Yeah. Hey, it happened. He mounted that rascal.

[Johnny 'Johnny D' Robertson]

This ain't the one that shot the drone, is it?

[Phil Robertson]

Let's see. What.

[Jase Robertson]

No, no, look, the. A lady in Jasper County, Mississippi.

[Phil Robertson]

Jasper County.

[Jase Robertson]

Baby walked outside, saw a monkey and said, old Jessica, they'd been warned that they'd escaped. And so she walked back inside, came back outside, and the monkey is no longer with us.

[Phil Robertson]

30. 30.

[Jase Robertson]

You don't mess with the state of Mississippi.

[Si Robertson]

Not if you're something like that, you don't. You absolutely don't on that deal. That's a toughie.

[Jase Robertson]

What happens if you shoot an animal that there's no rules for?

[Si Robertson]

I don't like.

[Jase Robertson]

Let's say. Let's say a giraffe walks kind of.

[Si Robertson]

It's kind of like here, right? Like there's. There's no mountain lion.

[Phil Robertson]

I'll tell you what a game.

[Si Robertson]

There's Mountain line.

[Phil Robertson]

I'll tell you what a game. Ward told me.

[Si Robertson]

I don't know.

[Phil Robertson]

I called him up and asked him, can I shoot a black panther? And he said, no. And I said, well, why? I said, y' all all say they don't exist. Why can't I shoot my imagination?

[Si Robertson]

Yeah, there you go.

[Phil Robertson]

And he said, no, you can't do it. I said, hey, that's the end. I said, hey, y' all been lying to the people. There are black panthers out there.

[Jase Robertson]

Oh, one yesterday.

[Phil Robertson]

You don't want me to shoot it because it'll prove you boys wrong.

[Si Robertson]

I'm game for you, too, by the way, there's no crow I've ever wanted to eat more than that.

[Johnny 'Johnny D' Robertson]

Will you pay the penalty? Will you pay the ticket?

[Jase Robertson]

There can't be a penalty.

[Si Robertson]

Hey, you couldn't like that.

[Phil Robertson]

Hey, you know to shoot a panther? I saw one just to prove you boys wrong. I wouldn't shoot it.

[Jase Robertson]

But then how Would you prove them wrong? Because you wouldn't have.

[Phil Robertson]

I won't. They just had to live with it. Because I'm gonna go to my grave saying, oh, they're there.

[Si Robertson]

Well, you gonna do that anyway.

[Phil Robertson]

I said, I don't really change a whole lot. And I. I don't want.

[Johnny 'Johnny D' Robertson]

The story stays the same.

[Phil Robertson]

I don't want but one person to be bit by the black panther.

[Johnny 'Johnny D' Robertson]

Oh, Jason Robertson.

[Phil Robertson]

That's Jason Robertson. I was one sneak up when he's deer hunting sometime and bite him right on the butt. So he'd have to believe then. Then I'd say, hey, drop your drawers, because I'm gonna show them the teeth mark for that panther bit you right on the butt.

[Jase Robertson]

Feels like there's a better way to show people that they're real, like the zoo.

[Phil Robertson]

But I'm serious, I would shoot one because I. That may be the last one in alive.

[Jase Robertson]

No, there's a lot of them.

[Phil Robertson]

I know it. I know. People tell me all the time to see them.

[Johnny 'Johnny D' Robertson]

Yeah, that's it.

[Phil Robertson]

In Florida.

[Johnny 'Johnny D' Robertson]

Yeah, in Florida. We were in Florida recently and somebody.

[Phil Robertson]

Was telling me the other day when we was down at Central Florida, out of the side ranch down there, they was telling me, hey, I see a couple the other day.

[Si Robertson]

Yeah, that's a couple pair.

[Johnny 'Johnny D' Robertson]

They did say that.

[Si Robertson]

Breeding pair. Yeah.

[Jase Robertson]

How you think they keep staying alive? You got.

[Phil Robertson]

All right, Tango. What? I can't even remember Jabo or something like that down there. At least live by Phil, who he's seen too.

[Johnny 'Johnny D' Robertson]

Jabo.

[Phil Robertson]

Huh?

[Johnny 'Johnny D' Robertson]

Jabo from.

[Phil Robertson]

From. I don't know, from major league. Some boat. Babo.

[Si Robertson]

That's Jabu.

[Johnny 'Johnny D' Robertson]

Oh, Bobo.

[Phil Robertson]

But he see two on the pipeline.

[Jase Robertson]

Hold on, hold on.

[Johnny 'Johnny D' Robertson]

Wait. First we gotta see who Babo is.

[Jase Robertson]

Who is Bobbo?

[Si Robertson]

Jabo. Babo.

[Johnny 'Johnny D' Robertson]

No, it's.

[Phil Robertson]

I don't know what his name is. I ain't right. But it's something like that.

[Si Robertson]

Jabba the Hut.

[Johnny 'Johnny D' Robertson]

Oh, yeah, that is who it was.

[Phil Robertson]

But he's saying too. He was deer hunting, seen two black panthers solo.

[Johnny 'Johnny D' Robertson]

You owe me.

[Jase Robertson]

I got really scared that I walked out on my porch the other night and there was. It was a cat. But for a brief moment, I thought, this is it. This is the moment. It was on our little couch on the front porch. That sucker went and jumped and ran. And then I ran back inside.

[Si Robertson]

That's like me open the morning, walking out to the duck. Oh, I. I don't know what I ran out of there. But in the dark first day, you ain't used to it. Like, I. I didn't even think, turn my light on, because I know the trail, right. Like, I just thought, all right, here I go. I got the decoys. Let's go. And I made about two steps in that water. Water started splashing all around me, running in every direction. And I was like, where's my light? Like, I just want to know what's about to run into me because I.

[Jase Robertson]

What if it's a cow?

[Si Robertson]

Yeah. What is this?

[Phil Robertson]

Was it deer?

[Si Robertson]

I don't know. I didn't get my light on. It was either deer or pigs, but I don't know. I don't know which one it was.

[Phil Robertson]

But that was when I was at the honey break, was in the blind.

[Si Robertson]

Yeah.

[Phil Robertson]

And I saw three. And I said. I said, there goes pigs. And then I. I said, but they was running funny.

[Si Robertson]

Yeah.

[Phil Robertson]

And then Drew said, well, there may not been pigs, because we got both pigs and bears. And I said, that's what they was. Three bears. It was a mama bear and two cubs. They move funny. Pigs don't run that way.

[Jase Robertson]

Yeah, yeah. Pigs and bears run different.

[Phil Robertson]

Oh, they know they look different.

[Jase Robertson]

Bad guy walks in. Oh, no. I have to say, hold on while I type in seven digits to my phone and all the things, and I can't get my gun unless I have a stop box. Then boom, right there. I have my phone in there instead of a gun. So we're all safe. If a bad guy were here, I would not be worried because I'd be able to get to my stuff just like that.

[Si Robertson]

We've all got kids, grandkids, whatever, whatever stage you're at. So you got to be safe. You got to keep it out of the way, but you got to keep it handy. And that's where the Stopbox Pro comes in handy because it's 100% mechanical with a genius push button locking system. No fumbling with keys or relying on batteries. And it's proudly made in the USA with top notch craftsmanship supporting American jobs. Whether you keep it on your nightstand, in a drawer under the bed, doesn't matter. Keep it handy because it gives you the peace of mind. Made simple. Plus, StopBox has a bunch of other cool products like their vehicle safe chamber lock and more to keep you prepared and protected wherever you are. And with the holidays coming up, it's the perfect time to upgrade your home security or give the gift of peace of mind to somebody that you care about. But super simple to set up. Look, it's well built, it's reliable. I don't know I mean, it's there.

[Jase Robertson]

For you when you need it.

[Si Robertson]

Yeah, it's the stop box, man. The holidays just got a little safer and, and a lot more affordable. For a limited time only, our listeners are getting a crazy deal. Not only do you get 10% off your entire order when you use code call@stopbox USA.com but they're also giving you buy one, get one free for their StopBox Pro. That's 10% off in a free Stopbox Pro when you use code call@stopbox USA.com.

[Jase Robertson]

I'm about to fry a turkey.

[Si Robertson]

Are you?

[Jase Robertson]

I got two of them.

[Si Robertson]

Two.

[Jase Robertson]

You know what?

[Phil Robertson]

I be careful doing it. Yeah. Actually get burnt bad.

[Johnny 'Johnny D' Robertson]

You got to take it slow. Nice and slow.

[Jase Robertson]

Don't do it in your kitchen.

[Phil Robertson]

Real easy.

[Si Robertson]

And don't do it on Friday. Yeah. Now I got that one outside.

[Phil Robertson]

That's dangerous.

[Jase Robertson]

Well, well, this is Aaron after Thanksgiving. But yeah, I'm in charge of the turkey this year and I'm nervous as crap because Uncle Joe was always in charge of turkeys.

[Johnny 'Johnny D' Robertson]

So you got to help her.

[Jase Robertson]

My cousin Lauren, we're going to do it together. And. But I got a plan. I bought two turkeys Pro move. You have two turkeys just in case. But I didn't know turkeys are so cheap. Why do we not eat turkey all year long?

[Si Robertson]

Because it's not very good and you.

[Johnny 'Johnny D' Robertson]

Don'T want to stay asleep the whole year.

[Si Robertson]

What? Because it's way easier to go to the deli and get a sliced turkey.

[Jase Robertson]

That ain't no good. I'm talking a deep fried turkey. Why do we not do that more often?

[Si Robertson]

I don't know.

[Jase Robertson]

Why is there not a restaurant?

[Si Robertson]

What size turkeys did you get?

[Jase Robertson]

See, I was a little nervous.

[Johnny 'Johnny D' Robertson]

Oh, 10 pound.

[Jase Robertson]

Well, I got two different sizes because I'm smarter than I look, you know. But I went in there and they were all like 25 pound turkey.

[Si Robertson]

I was like, oh, big daddy, I.

[Jase Robertson]

Didn'T buy that thing.

[Phil Robertson]

Oh.

[Jase Robertson]

I was like, that'll feed an army. So I got like a 18 and I think so.

[Phil Robertson]

You like that 55 gallon drum to put him in?

[Si Robertson]

Yeah. 18 is that. I wouldn't get an 18. That's a big one. I know.

[Jase Robertson]

That's the smallest of the bigger ones I could find.

[Si Robertson]

Yeah, I had to scour like three different racks the other day to get a 10 pounder. I sure was happy to get him too.

[Jase Robertson]

I see.

[Phil Robertson]

I couldn't find that.

[Si Robertson]

Yeah. No, you got to kind of be there when they reload it. Then what you bought a turkey.

[Jase Robertson]

Mr. Ham Sandwich.

[Si Robertson]

I've already cooked it.

[Jase Robertson]

Yeah, when you cook it?

[Si Robertson]

I cooked it last Wednesday. Video drops tonight on my YouTube channel.

[Jase Robertson]

Oh, what?

[Si Robertson]

Hey, man, I work for Pit Boss Grills, too. They asked me to do a thing, a collaboration with them in Academy for a smoked turkey.

[Jase Robertson]

So I have smoked a turkey on a pit boss for.

[Si Robertson]

It's good. Yeah, it was great. A 10 pounder is good because it doesn't cook very long. So, like, that's why. That's what I like love about the smaller turkeys is they just. They cook way faster.

[Johnny 'Johnny D' Robertson]

I should have got a phone call because I'm just, like, one minute away from your house.

[Si Robertson]

Did you want some?

[Johnny 'Johnny D' Robertson]

If you have any leftovers?

[Si Robertson]

Not anymore.

[Jase Robertson]

But, bro, he just said he cooked it a week ago.

[Johnny 'Johnny D' Robertson]

But, yeah, I gave it his refrigerator.

[Si Robertson]

Oh, it's just now getting to Phillip's age. I mean, I said, phil, Philip, don't mind an aged leftover. No, it was good. Britney even said it was good. So that ain't just me talking. She's a pretty tough critic.

[Johnny 'Johnny D' Robertson]

Y' all don't eat no leftovers, do you?

[Phil Robertson]

No. No leftovers.

[Si Robertson]

Yeah, Mom. Mom slid by and took the legs and thighs off of him.

[Jase Robertson]

Uh, now, you know you're a mama's boy. She just took the two best parts.

[Si Robertson]

Yeah, Mom, I'm sick. And then Brittany got on that breast, and I eat them wings. I do love a turkey. I know it's weird, but, man, I love that little crunchy sucker by the time it sits there.

[Jase Robertson]

And that's your favorite part of the fried.

[Si Robertson]

It is my favorite bite that includes meat is the.

[Phil Robertson]

Wow.

[Jase Robertson]

Yeah, because the skin's the best part.

[Si Robertson]

Yeah, the skin's hands down the best part. But the bite that includes meat is the wing of the turkey.

[Phil Robertson]

I love.

[Si Robertson]

It's got that little drumstick on it. And then the other. The front end of the flap is just, like, all crunch. I mean, that thing is so good.

[Jase Robertson]

Front end of the flat.

[Si Robertson]

Yeah, that thing is so good.

[Jase Robertson]

Why they always got, like, turkey legs at all these, like, bears and theme parks and not turkey wings?

[Si Robertson]

I don't know.

[Jase Robertson]

What are they doing with the turkey?

[Johnny 'Johnny D' Robertson]

No, the turkey legs, they're bigger. I mean, that's advertising. I mean, come on.

[Si Robertson]

I guess that's what's left over all them turkey breast you get in a deli, though, so I don't ever.

[Jase Robertson]

That makes sense how they park them. Send those to the.

[Si Robertson]

But what do they do with the thighs? Where's turkey thighs go? Where turkey wings.

[Jase Robertson]

Because the chicken thigh is the best part of a chicken.

[Phil Robertson]

Hands.

[Si Robertson]

Oh, brake pads. Incredible. That's the best part. Yeah.

[Jase Robertson]

What about Food Industries?

[Si Robertson]

It is crazy. Or they just grow in a bunch of turkey legs in a lab somewhere, you know?

[Johnny 'Johnny D' Robertson]

Are you working on your dressing? Are you working on the dressing?

[Phil Robertson]

The girls are. Right now, my wife and Liz.

[Si Robertson]

Cooking your cornbread.

[Phil Robertson]

Well, yeah, they're doing all the stuff.

[Si Robertson]

Yeah.

[Phil Robertson]

That way I'll just have to put it together.

[Si Robertson]

You just build it. Get me the supplies. And I bet if you build it.

[Phil Robertson]

Oh, no. This is going to be the finest I've ever made.

[Johnny 'Johnny D' Robertson]

How do you know?

[Phil Robertson]

I just know.

[Si Robertson]

You're gonna make a test batch, huh? You gonna make it all?

[Phil Robertson]

I'm gonna cook that big pot Phil uses.

[Si Robertson]

Yeah. Big magnet.

[Phil Robertson]

Full.

[Si Robertson]

Oh, you cooking for everybody?

[Phil Robertson]

Oh, yeah, that's gonna be full.

[Si Robertson]

Okay. All right.

[Johnny 'Johnny D' Robertson]

I didn't know you're cooking for the whole family and.

[Phil Robertson]

Yeah, and that's going to be the best I've ever done.

[Jase Robertson]

How do you already know?

[Phil Robertson]

Because I know what I'm doing.

[Si Robertson]

Because he's not negative.

[Johnny 'Johnny D' Robertson]

You are. I know what I'm doing.

[Jase Robertson]

Thanks.

[Si Robertson]

He exudes positivity.

[Johnny 'Johnny D' Robertson]

We need to have that conversation.

[Phil Robertson]

Me four. What are they? Casserole. Oh, yeah, casserole thing. 14 by 18 casserole dishes.

[Si Robertson]

There you go.

[Phil Robertson]

Christine eats about, oh, maybe a third of one.

[Si Robertson]

I ate about half of that when you brought it here.

[Phil Robertson]

I ate all the rest.

[Si Robertson]

Dressing's good.

[Phil Robertson]

I double. I double the vegetables.

[Jase Robertson]

You know who I like.

[Si Robertson]

But why do some people call it stuffing? When does it swap from stuffing to dressing?

[Phil Robertson]

I don't know. Stuffing?

[Si Robertson]

No, but I've always just.

[Jase Robertson]

I guess if you stuff it into the.

[Si Robertson]

Oh, if you actually put. That's for them. People cook a turkey, they put it inside a turkey.

[Jase Robertson]

I put it inside a turkey and smoked it before.

[Si Robertson]

Have you?

[Jase Robertson]

Yeah, I just. I basically just made cornbread and shoved it up a turkey's butt and then put it.

[Phil Robertson]

The turkey in the dressing is. You put either green wing, teal, six of them or eight.

[Jase Robertson]

All woody and sage.

[Si Robertson]

Yeah, lots of sage.

[Phil Robertson]

Oh, see, that's the key. Look, I'm making four batches.

[Jase Robertson]

We should. We got to get him.

[Johnny 'Johnny D' Robertson]

Hey, we need to video it.

[Jase Robertson]

Instagram. You could be like that. Does anybody else's algorithm have the dude with the pepper holsters on his arm all the time?

[Johnny 'Johnny D' Robertson]

Yeah, yeah.

[Jase Robertson]

I see him every day and he's like.

[Si Robertson]

Well, you just said it. My phone's in the room, so I'm sure I will later.

[Jase Robertson]

Wait, Till you see it. He's got, like, a. Like a wristband, quarterback style of his. Different sauces he uses, really. And he's super redneck. He's like, get you a 10 full pan.

[Phil Robertson]

I'm gonna do one. I'm gonna do one thing this year. So Charles said, okay, little too much. Too much sight.

[Jase Robertson]

Back off the.

[Si Robertson]

I didn't. Hey, time out for the record. What? That's not what I said. I said, if that's how you like it, do it.

[Phil Robertson]

Well, no, no.

[Si Robertson]

It's just heavy on the save. Like, cook. That's what I don't get about people. Cook it however. You're the one doing the cooking however you want to.

[Phil Robertson]

No, no, But I brought it in. When I said it, I said, hey, this is not for y'.

[Si Robertson]

All.

[Phil Robertson]

It was great for y'.

[Si Robertson]

All. Yeah, I cooked this for me, and it was great. I ate half that pan you brought that day. I mean, it just now it. To say that it was heavy on the. Say it was, but it was still good to me.

[Phil Robertson]

I enjoy it.

[Si Robertson]

Yeah.

[Phil Robertson]

And if that's what I'm all lighting it up for the people. They. They like it a little lighter.

[Si Robertson]

Yeah.

[Phil Robertson]

I'm more just. I'm all light a little bit, so.

[Si Robertson]

I gonna take his own sage shaker with him.

[Johnny 'Johnny D' Robertson]

Well, talking about a little.

[Jase Robertson]

Little. We can get you a sage.

[Phil Robertson]

No, no more. I've been thinking about this. Gonna be the best ever made.

[Johnny 'Johnny D' Robertson]

I probably may need to video it, at least some of it, but. But I videoed him cooking squirrels, and it got, like, a ton of views on Facebook.

[Jase Robertson]

That's what I'm saying.

[Si Robertson]

I think.

[Jase Robertson]

Sigh. Making Instagram and Facebook reels of him cooking. He could be famous one day now.

[Johnny 'Johnny D' Robertson]

Here we go.

[Si Robertson]

My wife just texted me, asked me what size underwear I wear. Should I be concerned?

[Jase Robertson]

Christmas, man.

[Johnny 'Johnny D' Robertson]

Something just got.

[Jase Robertson]

Tell her to text Allison and say, john David's a large. At this point. Okay, I think I'm a large. Underwear is weird.

[Si Robertson]

Yeah.

[Jase Robertson]

It does not fit the same as shirts.

[Si Robertson]

Well, in this day and age, nothing is the same size. Like, an XL in one brand does not equal xl.

[Johnny 'Johnny D' Robertson]

No, you're right.

[Si Robertson]

It's like, can we standardize sizing? Yeah, can we just.

[Jase Robertson]

But what's up with pants and shirts fit? Well, maybe because I've. I'm shaped odd.

[Phil Robertson]

Okay.

[Jase Robertson]

I'm not going down that road. I'm gonna get made fun of. I have tiny legs and kind of a gut, so. But, like, at one point, you remember.

[Si Robertson]

That time Stone called that old boy at Pear shaped feller. I don't even remember who it was.

[Jase Robertson]

He was.

[Si Robertson]

I just remember he said, you talking about that pear shaped feller?

[Jase Robertson]

He was the guy that I paid to go all the way to Mississippi to pick up Willie's ham.

[Si Robertson]

Oh, yeah, okay.

[Jase Robertson]

Pear shaped boy.

[Phil Robertson]

Yeah.

[Si Robertson]

Pear shaped feller.

[Johnny 'Johnny D' Robertson]

Pear shaped feller. You know, pear shaped fellow.

[Si Robertson]

That's one of Stone's top three lines about anything. I just, I. Because I won't ever forget that old pear shape. You mean that pear shaped feller?

[Jase Robertson]

Like I saw him not too long ago.

[Si Robertson]

What's his name? What's his first name?

[Jase Robertson]

You know, when I saw him, I remembered him as the pear shape.

[Johnny 'Johnny D' Robertson]

And then you couldn't say that and.

[Jase Robertson]

I couldn't say that. So I probably manned and dude, to do Malone. Hey, you and I'd probably know his name if we weren't right here.

[Si Robertson]

Yeah. On the spot. Yeah. What's up, bro?

[Jase Robertson]

Bro.

[Johnny 'Johnny D' Robertson]

Chief.

[Si Robertson]

Yeah, I just got that text. That was weird. I don't.

[Jase Robertson]

That's not weird. Dude, you need underwear.

[Si Robertson]

Oh, I. I don't. I've reached that as a guy who loves socks and underwear for gifts because I just get annoyed having to go buy them. Yeah, I support that.

[Jase Robertson]

I need a lot of underwear this year.

[Si Robertson]

I'm running out of under.

[Jase Robertson]

Running low.

[Si Robertson]

Running low, he said.

[Johnny 'Johnny D' Robertson]

Was it. Was it like, you know, hey, something's happened to all your other underwear.

[Si Robertson]

Oh, now she will go in there and when I ain't paying attention and get the ones that's got the holes in them and throw them out. Out in the trash. I ain't a big fan of that.

[Phil Robertson]

Rip some off of me if I ain't got a hole in my wall by her. That's it.

[Si Robertson]

Britney, if you listen, if you listen, I much more support this method.

[Phil Robertson]

Next thing. No, no.

[Si Robertson]

Than going through my drawer.

[Phil Robertson]

Yeah, Next thing that happened is, hey, I'm walking around because she done ripped them suckers off of me.

[Jase Robertson]

You are a legend.

[Si Robertson]

You really are a legend.

[Jase Robertson]

We've been endorsing Pure Talk for a while, my wireless company. And I can honestly tell you guys, I've never seen an offer like this from them before.

[Phil Robertson]

And not all that, hey, these guys, okay, treat veterans good? Oh, yeah, they raise money for them, take care of them, you know, do all kind of stuff. That's one reason I stand behind them. Okay?

[Jase Robertson]

But right now they're being really good to you because. Listen to this. Unlimited talk, unlimited text and unlimited Data, plus a third 30 gig hotspot for just 29.9, 5.

[Phil Robertson]

And here's the kicker. It's for lifetime.

[Jase Robertson]

For the rest of your life, that is what you are gonna lock in. This is Pure Talk's top tier plan. Normally 65 bucks a month, but now through December 7th, it's just 29.95amonth. That's over 50%.

[Phil Robertson]

All right, guys, that's for life.

[Jase Robertson]

Every month for life. And it's on their crazy fast 5G network. But heads up, it's not gonna be around for long. Make the switch today. Then tell all your friends that you're saving a ton of money with Pure Talk. Look, I made the switch over, kept my number. It was super simple. Took like 10 minutes.

[Phil Robertson]

Boom.

[Jase Robertson]

I'm with Pure Talk now. They're just a great company. Like SI said, they're all about helping out veterans. That's one of their philanthropic things they do, which is something we love about them. So right now, go to PureTalk.com for PureTalk's best unlimited plan for just 29.95amonth for life. Make the switch in as little as 10 minutes. Keep your phone, keep your number, and start saving with unlimited for Life for just 29.95amonth. Again, that's PureTalk.com to switch to my wireless company, Pure Talk. Taxes and fees not included. Some Restrictions apply. See PureTalk.com for details. Offer ends 12, 7, 25. Do you ever put a hole in your underwear on purpose?

[Phil Robertson]

No.

[Si Robertson]

You walk around in your drawers a lot? Yeah.

[Phil Robertson]

Yeah, I've been to his house a.

[Jase Robertson]

Couple times and he had to put.

[Phil Robertson]

A hole in it. I find out quickly.

[Si Robertson]

You ever thought of moving? You ever thought of moving the location of the hole? I mean, it may be most of mine end up right there somewhere in the butt crack area. I mean, and then.

[Jase Robertson]

Yeah.

[Phil Robertson]

Hey, that's what's so crazy.

[Si Robertson]

Between the crops where holes in my.

[Phil Robertson]

Underwear in different spots, like on the side.

[Jase Robertson]

He's a heavy sleeper.

[Phil Robertson]

You. I don't know what the crap is about that.

[Jase Robertson]

It took us a while, but we're here.

[Johnny 'Johnny D' Robertson]

That's a washing machine issue they're getting.

[Phil Robertson]

Hold on, I gotta ask.

[Johnny 'Johnny D' Robertson]

Ripped in the wash.

[Si Robertson]

I want that on a bumper sticker. I don't know what the crap there is about that. And that can go for anything.

[Phil Robertson]

No, no, because, hey, look, I was going toward the restroom and I was. I was kind of in a hurry.

[Si Robertson]

Yeah.

[Phil Robertson]

Next thing I know is I'm putting being pulled backwards.

[Si Robertson]

Oh, man. Good for you.

[Phil Robertson]

I don't walk by.

[Si Robertson]

Hold on.

[Phil Robertson]

A hole in it. And she Done hooked me with her finger and. Hey, here we go.

[Jase Robertson]

I'm scared, but I'm going here. Friend who does the laundry in your house?

[Phil Robertson]

Well, Christine used to it, but now Liz does it.

[Jase Robertson]

Okay, but do you think she ever. So she can.

[Si Robertson]

Oh, so she can snatch her.

[Phil Robertson]

It's a little pain we was talking about one day.

[Si Robertson]

Love is not dead. Love is.

[Jase Robertson]

Hold on.

[Phil Robertson]

Left the room just covering her mouth.

[Si Robertson]

Because you was naked?

[Phil Robertson]

No, because we was telling a story about Christine ripping my underwear off. Yeah, because usually when we get a little playful.

[Si Robertson]

Yes.

[Johnny 'Johnny D' Robertson]

What is it that you rip off?

[Si Robertson]

Why is it so fun to think about old people still being playful? I love it, man. Yeah, because I hope it's me. Yeah, I mean, like, I hope. I hope me and Brittany still like each other enough. Point. There's no doubt we'll love each other enough. But I hope we still like each other.

[Jase Robertson]

It only gets better right now.

[Phil Robertson]

It only gets better and funnier.

[Si Robertson]

Even though right now, I tell you, Brittany is not happy with me, so that's fine.

[Phil Robertson]

Why not?

[Si Robertson]

Apparently, I snored all night last night.

[Jase Robertson]

Well, you don't have any control over that.

[Si Robertson]

Well, I mean, I kind of, but it was, you know, I thought. And then she went and got on the couch. Well, every night is duck season, right? So I take all my clothes before I go to bed and put them in the living room so I can get dressed without, you know, without making racket. Well, see, the problem is she done went in there and slept in the dressing room.

[Johnny 'Johnny D' Robertson]

Yeah, she's in the racket then.

[Jase Robertson]

You.

[Si Robertson]

Know, 415 roll around. I'm in there fumbling around, trying to find my clothes. And why is it when you try to be quiet, you make noise? You make way more noise than if.

[Phil Robertson]

You just want to add one of those. Yeah.

[Si Robertson]

Yeah. And so that woke her up again. And the look I got was not one of, I hope you have a good morning hunt.

[Phil Robertson]

Yeah.

[Jase Robertson]

She wanted you to strike.

[Si Robertson]

Yeah. The look was more of where's your shotgun? Again?

[Johnny 'Johnny D' Robertson]

And when did this happen?

[Si Robertson]

This morning.

[Johnny 'Johnny D' Robertson]

Okay. And then you got that text later on today. Ok. Something's up.

[Si Robertson]

Yeah. About my underwear.

[Johnny 'Johnny D' Robertson]

Yeah, she done tore them all up.

[Si Robertson]

Now I'm.

[Johnny 'Johnny D' Robertson]

That's what happened.

[Si Robertson]

Now I'm concerned. Yeah. Now I've got issues.

[Johnny 'Johnny D' Robertson]

She did you like Johnny D's wife does him with all the food in the fridge. Other than the too much food in the freezer.

[Si Robertson]

Just throw it away.

[Jase Robertson]

Throw it away. Throw away anything. Allison wants a dumpster for Christmas. Just throw stuff away.

[Phil Robertson]

For Christmas.

[Si Robertson]

Hey, man. Went in doubt. Throw it away. I told.

[Jase Robertson]

I just texted Allison and said s. Said christine rips his underwear off if she. He sees a hole in his underwear. And Allison said, I bet he likes to keep holes in his underwear.

[Johnny 'Johnny D' Robertson]

Yeah, he can't. He should now you know.

[Si Robertson]

Now you should reply. I think the ones I'm wearing have a hole in them.

[Jase Robertson]

No, I just said I'm gonna try it.

[Phil Robertson]

Oh, wacky.

[Jase Robertson]

What a wacky day.

[Si Robertson]

Oh, man. Merry Christmas.

[Phil Robertson]

It's never dull around the Robinson's place, Boys.

[Si Robertson]

That is. Yeah.

[Jase Robertson]

Y' all ready for the next level fridge? No, I have a third fridge that I wasn't gonna tell y' all better fridge.

[Si Robertson]

Do you have a bedroom fridge?

[Johnny 'Johnny D' Robertson]

Bathroom?

[Si Robertson]

Bathroom. Fridge.

[Phil Robertson]

Bathroom fridge.

[Si Robertson]

Looks like an odd place to have.

[Jase Robertson]

No, it's a great place to have. You wake up, you got to pee. You. Yeah, I don't want to walk away. Kitchen. Get a bottle of water. Boom. Bathroom.

[Si Robertson]

Oh, yeah. Well, I keep a yeti. A yeti bottle full of water on my nightstand.

[Jase Robertson]

If you get a bathroom fridge, you don't even have to do that.

[Phil Robertson]

Oh, you like me.

[Jase Robertson]

The bathroom fridge.

[Phil Robertson]

I go to bed. That's at yeti.

[Si Robertson]

Yeah.

[Phil Robertson]

Sitting there for the tea.

[Johnny 'Johnny D' Robertson]

I got to have a bottle at night.

[Phil Robertson]

Oh, no.

[Johnny 'Johnny D' Robertson]

Hey, it's not gonna stain his teeth.

[Phil Robertson]

I get thirsty.

[Jase Robertson]

When was the last time you drank water? I've seen other night one.

[Johnny 'Johnny D' Robertson]

I said, yeah, he drank some on the plane the other day when we were going to Central Florida.

[Phil Robertson]

Matter of fact, it was down at Island's Aside. Somebody said, hey, yeah, I want you guys bottled water. And it was ice cold. And I said, hey, throw me that thing. Yeah, I said, hey, I'm a little low on my tea and lemon.

[Si Robertson]

I do love water.

[Johnny 'Johnny D' Robertson]

So you got a lot of family coming in for Thanksgiving. This is a big deal.

[Si Robertson]

I was tracing them.

[Johnny 'Johnny D' Robertson]

Yeah, all his grandkids and both of his kids.

[Si Robertson]

Are y' all doing it at your house now?

[Phil Robertson]

They're standing down at Lodge.

[Si Robertson]

Okay.

[Phil Robertson]

We're. Phyllis and his bunch used to stay.

[Si Robertson]

But y' all doing the feast at your house?

[Phil Robertson]

Yeah, no, that's at Willy's.

[Si Robertson]

Oh, so they're all going?

[Phil Robertson]

They are.

[Si Robertson]

Okay.

[Jase Robertson]

What time is that at, by the way?

[Phil Robertson]

Five thirty.

[Si Robertson]

You want to show up about 7?

[Phil Robertson]

That's what it. That's what I was told. 5:30.

[Jase Robertson]

I'm just.

[Si Robertson]

No, I'm.

[Johnny 'Johnny D' Robertson]

I'm trying to figure out will they'll be there at 8.

[Si Robertson]

Yeah. Are y' all gonna play poker after?

[Phil Robertson]

I doubt it. Everybody be too full.

[Si Robertson]

Everybody. They'd be full of dressing.

[Jase Robertson]

What is the proper time to eat? Thanksgiving. I believe there is a set time that is better than the others.

[Si Robertson]

I don't know. We always did lunch because we were trying. We were trying to get to the hunting camp. We always didn't. I knew growing up and it still kind of stays that way. Like Thanksgiving was noon if you were a minute. Normally am all was not wait.

[Phil Robertson]

No. Normally it went down and feel when Phil was here, that's when we'd have it 12 o'. Clock. We would duck Hunt till about 11 and he'd be getting somebody with us. Got a phone said check with K and see you know what time she wants there.

[Si Robertson]

Yeah.

[Johnny 'Johnny D' Robertson]

So my family does it at lunchtime, like at 12 noon. But then like we all go to my mom's and then that's in the evening just so everybody can make it.

[Si Robertson]

So you do two meals on Thanksgiving. Good for you, buddy. Hey, good for Philip. Philip. And hog heaven. I'm going about the last. Are you the kind that goes to Thanksgiving with Tupperwares?

[Phil Robertson]

There's about three things that I really.

[Jase Robertson]

Shows up with brand new Tupperware.

[Phil Robertson]

Yeah.

[Si Robertson]

There you go, boys.

[Phil Robertson]

There's about three things I really enjoy about Thanksgiving.

[Si Robertson]

What's that?

[Phil Robertson]

Duck and dressing.

[Si Robertson]

Yeah.

[Phil Robertson]

Then the devil eggs.

[Si Robertson]

Rooster rockets. Yeah.

[Phil Robertson]

Well, they eat about six of them.

[Si Robertson]

I do love a rooster Rock.

[Jase Robertson]

That place in town got some good.

[Phil Robertson]

I could eat the whole tray that everybody brings. Yeah, I could eat the whole thing.

[Si Robertson]

They make you poop.

[Phil Robertson]

Oh, hey. And I mean. I mean, hey, it's one of them SPD's.

[Si Robertson]

Yeah.

[Phil Robertson]

We're not filming silent, but deathly.

[Si Robertson]

What is it about a deviled egg makes you rotten? It give you some gas, man.

[Phil Robertson]

Good. He said that's some of the worst. That's some of the worst gases you ever smell.

[Si Robertson]

Yeah. Devil day.

[Phil Robertson]

It really is.

[Johnny 'Johnny D' Robertson]

I mean, eat it on Saturday night.

[Jase Robertson]

That explains a lot of carbon.

[Johnny 'Johnny D' Robertson]

You know.

[Phil Robertson]

No, no, no, no. That. No, we are invite. Jeff.

[Johnny 'Johnny D' Robertson]

Bart man.

[Phil Robertson]

Yeah.

[Si Robertson]

Fart man from the poker game.

[Phil Robertson]

Yeah.

[Si Robertson]

I don't know what the science is about your gut and a deviled egg that leads to copious amounts of gas.

[Phil Robertson]

It's a. It's a. What is the word I'm looking for?

[Si Robertson]

It's a phenomenon.

[Phil Robertson]

Yeah, well, like it's.

[Jase Robertson]

It's a phenomenon.

[Si Robertson]

It's. It's. It's rough.

[Phil Robertson]

It's a lot of.

[Jase Robertson]

It's like asparagus pee.

[Phil Robertson]

It's a lot of. It goes to a lot of Changes.

[Johnny 'Johnny D' Robertson]

Before like ruminates in your stomach.

[Jase Robertson]

I don't like asparagus. Unless you turn it into cheese fries and put a bunch of parmesan butter and garlic and bacon on there then. They're awesome. Yeah, but what is that?

[Phil Robertson]

Oh, I could eat three trays. Three trays of devil's eggs right now.

[Si Robertson]

Oh devil.

[Johnny 'Johnny D' Robertson]

Oh yeah. Now those are good. I've tell I find myself eating a.

[Si Robertson]

Lot of those heavy paprika too. I want you to turn off of that rascal.

[Phil Robertson]

Oh yeah.

[Johnny 'Johnny D' Robertson]

Like that.

[Phil Robertson]

Jj, you ever been in debt?

[Si Robertson]

Oh yeah.

[Johnny 'Johnny D' Robertson]

Yeah.

[Jase Robertson]

When Carter popped out, I thought I.

[Phil Robertson]

Had a bunch of unexpected bills.

[Jase Robertson]

Oh, and them kid bills racked up fast. Hospital bills racked up fast. And if you could make one holiday wish, would you wish to be free from your credit card and other debt? Let's see if we can help you out. Here's the time to make the move. At the year end, credit card and loan companies close their books, which means they're cleaning up past due accounts and sometimes selling or writing off debts. Look, if you have credit card debt and unpaid bills, lenders may be more willing to negotiate. And right now you actually have the leverage. Done with debt knows how to use that timing to your advantage. Negotiating hard so you can get out from under the debt and high interest without bankruptcy or new loans. They just got strategies. Done with debt goes to work for you month one and with one clear goal. To reduce your total debt and leave you with more money every month. That's just a good deal. Debt's stressful.

[Phil Robertson]

Hey, that's it.

[Jase Robertson]

Look, and I got a degree in finance and I still don't understand it all. So you need some smart people telling you things because it's always changing. These guys are keeping up with it. They can help you out because debt is not fun to be in. And if you get debt free, it is like living in paradise because it's just life's easy.

[Phil Robertson]

Hey, they religious stress boys take care of business. Go with the pros.

[Jase Robertson]

Go with the pros. So get started now because your leverage may disappear at the year end. Chat for free with Done with debt [e-mail] that's done with that dot com. Done with that dot com. I saw this really in shape dude at the grocery store when I was buying my Tony Shergus butter to put in my turkey.

[Si Robertson]

Was it me inject in here?

[Jase Robertson]

Oh no, no, it definitely wasn't you. You don't eat like this guy. I mean he, he looked like he could bench press £400.

[Si Robertson]

What was he getting?

[Jase Robertson]

Can chicken and then just a bunch of rice. And I was like, dude, it's probably not worth it.

[Si Robertson]

Chicken rotisseries, man.

[Jase Robertson]

He had. He had. He was buying chicken like people buy dip. Like in a roll.

[Si Robertson]

Yeah.

[Jase Robertson]

Cellophane together. And I was like, I've seen it.

[Si Robertson]

Brittany will do that from time to time. She'll get on that. I need low carb kick, and she'll get that canned chicken. The problem is it smells suspiciously like cat food when you open. Open it, like, you know, because it is cat.

[Johnny 'Johnny D' Robertson]

Same ingredient.

[Jase Robertson]

You ever eat canned chicken?

[Si Robertson]

Not that he was aware. I'll say this. Not intentionally.

[Phil Robertson]

No.

[Si Robertson]

He never. He never intentionally ate it.

[Jase Robertson]

I ain't doing no can.

[Si Robertson]

But, you know, but, like, them women will get on them health kicks, and they'll.

[Jase Robertson]

Oh, it's a health kick thing.

[Si Robertson]

Yeah.

[Jase Robertson]

You can eat for, like, 40 days and only eat protein. And. And it only costs, like, 42 cents.

[Phil Robertson]

Because the only thing I'm thinking right now is Phil's. Oh, it's a big ball.

[Jase Robertson]

Boudin balls.

[Phil Robertson]

No, cheese ball.

[Si Robertson]

Oh, the cheese ball.

[Phil Robertson]

Nope. Oh, he'll cook chicken with garlic. Garlic.

[Jase Robertson]

Garlic.

[Phil Robertson]

Oh, he had, like, three. Three of them.

[Si Robertson]

Oh, the heads of garlic.

[Phil Robertson]

And he made that chicken.

[Si Robertson]

Sticky chicken.

[Phil Robertson]

Garlic chicken. Sticky chicken.

[Jase Robertson]

Yeah, sticky chicken.

[Phil Robertson]

I come down there, and when I walked in, it's about there. Knocked me out, the smell. Garlic.

[Johnny 'Johnny D' Robertson]

Garlic.

[Phil Robertson]

And he said, were you about ready to eat? I said, I don't know, because he checked it. He opened the oven door, and it had it in there in a big pan. Just solid garlic. And I mean, big cloves of it.

[Si Robertson]

Yeah.

[Phil Robertson]

You know, And I said, I don't know if I can eat it. He said, you won't. You won't taste it. And I said, you're out of your mind. You got a half a pound of garlic in there. Half a pound of garlic. And I said, yeah. And I'm serious. He had a half a pound of garlic. I said, I won't be able to eat that. That junk. I. I'm smelling it right now. He said, you won't even taste it. You know, So I just. I grabbed me a leg. Little leg. It might have been a wing. I think it was wing. And I tasted it, and then next thing. Hey, hand me about three more pieces. That. So I ain't playing it.

[Si Robertson]

When you. When you cook with garlic, do you use cloves, or do you use, like, what I like to call garlic?

[Jase Robertson]

Garlic rules, bro.

[Phil Robertson]

I like the. Just open it up. Sprinkle. It on it.

[Si Robertson]

Yeah, the. The. Just the jar.

[Phil Robertson]

Blue jar.

[Jase Robertson]

Garlic.

[Phil Robertson]

Yeah, like sage.

[Si Robertson]

Oh, use the dried garlic. You use dehydrated garlic?

[Phil Robertson]

Oh, yeah. Oh, but you asked me how did I know my dress is going to be good? Is because he's positive.

[Jase Robertson]

That was 20 minutes ago.

[Phil Robertson]

I know.

[Si Robertson]

I got it at home.

[Phil Robertson]

You said the garlic reminded me. Okay, because I measure my sage. I got four containers that I mix the bread and everything in, and then I actually count out how much sage I'm gonna use, and each container gets the same amount. And then I take a 10 full pan and stir it up where it's all everything on everything. Then I put my broth in it.

[Si Robertson]

And not to mention, he's just full of positivity. So, you know.

[Phil Robertson]

Oh, I could eat the whole thing myself.

[Jase Robertson]

Positivity. Bible verse.

[Phil Robertson]

I'm telling. Hey, look, I'm telling you, I could do it. I'm like. I'm like, damn, thank his name now. But movie about. He ate 50 boiled eggs.

[Johnny 'Johnny D' Robertson]

The Cool Hand Loop.

[Phil Robertson]

Cool Hand. Look at.

[Si Robertson]

He has some.

[Phil Robertson]

Yeah, no, no, I could eat. Hey, once I make this dressing with that whole big container that Phil uses, I could eat every bit of it myself.

[Jase Robertson]

Do it, son.

[Phil Robertson]

I could eat the whole.

[Johnny 'Johnny D' Robertson]

I like.

[Phil Robertson]

I like.

[Johnny 'Johnny D' Robertson]

When he said, Luke, why'd you have to say 50? Why couldn't you sit 30? Or something like that?

[Phil Robertson]

Yeah, but he ate all 50 of them.

[Jase Robertson]

I haven't seen Cool Hand Luke.

[Phil Robertson]

I wouldn't want to be around that boy for the next two weeks.

[Johnny 'Johnny D' Robertson]

Oh, nice. Yeah, he was.

[Jase Robertson]

Whoa, whoa. Came out in 1967. Looking at me like I'm crazy.

[Phil Robertson]

It's a good movie.

[Jase Robertson]

I was next.

[Johnny 'Johnny D' Robertson]

Old blue Eyes. What's his name? Paul Newman.

[Phil Robertson]

Paul Newman. And then who was the other guy?

[Johnny 'Johnny D' Robertson]

Seen that one?

[Si Robertson]

I've seen pieces of it.

[Phil Robertson]

Yeah. No, no. Paul Newman was star. But then the other guy, Dragline Hunter.

[Si Robertson]

Who said on your repertoire?

[Phil Robertson]

I can't remember.

[Jase Robertson]

Not even in Hunter's database.

[Johnny 'Johnny D' Robertson]

Yeah, yeah, that was the. The one they called Dragon. Yeah, it was a good 1,850 hardboard.

[Si Robertson]

Oh, man, I'm gonna watch that tonight.

[Jase Robertson]

Now.

[Johnny 'Johnny D' Robertson]

I can't wait for you.

[Phil Robertson]

What has the world been up to since we've been a hair?

[Si Robertson]

Yeah. Do we have email the last 50 minutes?

[Jase Robertson]

Oh, no.

[Si Robertson]

We got an email.

[Phil Robertson]

Or email.

[Jase Robertson]

Oh, man, I. I'd exit out of it.

[Phil Robertson]

That's right. What is everybody helping for?

[Jase Robertson]

Mainly everybody sending me this thing of a deer hunting human beings with Little Debbie Christmas cakes. But the best news I think I may have ever heard there's the new luckiest child in America. Formerly used to be me. There's a new one.

[Si Robertson]

Okay.

[Jase Robertson]

What do you think happened to this child? Springfield, Missouri.

[Johnny 'Johnny D' Robertson]

I just got back from there and.

[Phil Robertson]

I'll be going there in March.

[Si Robertson]

They found out Johnny Morris is their dad?

[Jase Robertson]

No.

[Si Robertson]

Oh.

[Phil Robertson]

Although.

[Jase Robertson]

That would be neat. My job would get much more complicated. No. Nathan and Jenna had a child in Springfield.

[Si Robertson]

Oh.

[Jase Robertson]

They did not make it to the hospital. Sounds unlucky.

[Phil Robertson]

They had it in a cab.

[Jase Robertson]

Nope, they had it in the car.

[Phil Robertson]

Okay.

[Jase Robertson]

In a Buc ee's parking lot.

[Phil Robertson]

I mean, I don't know if life.

[Jase Robertson]

Gets better than starting it, but they.

[Phil Robertson]

Can name him Crunchy. Old Crunchy Old country was born in.

[Johnny 'Johnny D' Robertson]

The parking lot besties.

[Jase Robertson]

But Justin sent me me that. Apparently he's from there because he said what a great start to life when you're first day on planet earth starts at Buc EE's and you make the local Springfield, Missouri news.

[Phil Robertson]

There you go. Congratulations on your baby.

[Si Robertson]

I'd say a slow day in Springfield, but that sounds pretty regular for my. My time. From my time and experience there. I love through all these. Yeah, I don't mind Springfield.

[Phil Robertson]

It's just they got some good people.

[Johnny 'Johnny D' Robertson]

They do. So.

[Jase Robertson]

And you know Doc.

[Phil Robertson]

Doc them. His team. Hey, one of them.

[Si Robertson]

Yeah. And that aquarium is really cool there like that one. They did a really good job on that thing.

[Jase Robertson]

I've always wanted an aquarium.

[Si Robertson]

Yeah. This is a big.

[Jase Robertson]

They had that baby at 3:16 in the morning. And just so we're all.

[Johnny 'Johnny D' Robertson]

They named him John baby.

[Jase Robertson]

Authorities were there at 317 because they were trying to meet up with.

[Si Robertson]

Well, because they heard brisket on the board.

[Phil Robertson]

Brisket on the board.

[Jase Robertson]

Brisket on the board.

[Phil Robertson]

And a rack of ribs.

[Si Robertson]

And that may be when they swap from sandwiches to tacos. Oh, because I would have been there.

[Jase Robertson]

Oh man.

[Phil Robertson]

I can eat a bunch of tacos, right?

[Johnny 'Johnny D' Robertson]

You must be starving.

[Si Robertson]

Golly. We hunt until 7:20, then cook bacon and eggs. I'm good.

[Phil Robertson]

And then when I get back, I'm gonna have to start doing the prayers for my dressing. Unless my sweet wife and Liz has already done it.

[Si Robertson]

Play your cards right, you go in there.

[Phil Robertson]

Because I was working on it when I left.

[Si Robertson]

Play cards right, you go in there, cut you a hole in the underwear. You can be gone for 30 minutes.

[Phil Robertson]

Scissors cut around hole in my underwear and then walk back to his tank.

[Si Robertson]

And then I don't think I'm going.

[Jase Robertson]

To be able to sit by you. Of Course you'll have for the rest of my life. And think of it the same anymore.

[Johnny 'Johnny D' Robertson]

Oh, holy, holy underwear.

[Si Robertson]

Does it. Does the same strategy follow for pants? Like if you walk by with a hole in your britches, does she rip your britches or.

[Jase Robertson]

Those are pretty.

[Phil Robertson]

Don't play with my legs on.

[Si Robertson]

You get hurt, he will slap you.

[Phil Robertson]

I'll slap piss. That a.

[Si Robertson]

Can't confirm. Can't confirm. Reached over.

[Jase Robertson]

I was just.

[Si Robertson]

I reached over and put my hand on it.

[Jase Robertson]

Yeah, I was testing the strength of the pain.

[Si Robertson]

Reached over and put my hand on his. Where he couldn't see. He slaps. Not at him.

[Phil Robertson]

I'm talking about.

[Si Robertson]

Yeah, he was about half asleep over there and I just reached over there and rubbed.

[Phil Robertson]

I wasn't paying attention. Next time I felt something running down my leg.

[Jase Robertson]

Yeah, well, just so we're both clear, you walk in here with a hole in your underwear, I'm.

[Johnny 'Johnny D' Robertson]

I'm going to leave them on.

[Si Robertson]

Oh, just so we're clear, you walk in here with a hole in your drawers, I'm going to leave them be.

[Phil Robertson]

I gotta tell you this, it sounds.

[Si Robertson]

Like too much of a game.

[Phil Robertson]

When me and Christine was having trouble getting pregnant.

[Johnny 'Johnny D' Robertson]

Oh, okay.

[Phil Robertson]

We. She went to the doctor, I went to the doctor and all this stuff. So what the problem was, okay, is I was wearing sports underwear. Those are tight fit type timeout.

[Si Robertson]

This is a Seinfeld episode.

[Phil Robertson]

And then the doc said, well, hey, here's your cure. Those are sports underwear out the window.

[Johnny 'Johnny D' Robertson]

Whitey tighties.

[Phil Robertson]

Gotta get you some whitey tighty boxing boxers. So look, first night I took me a shower, come out of the shower, put on my whitey tighties and I'll come in the bedroom and Christine's there.

[Si Robertson]

Can't confirm he still wears whitey ties.

[Phil Robertson]

I don't have one, but I had one in bales and it was dang enough.

[Si Robertson]

Oh, like a boxer.

[Phil Robertson]

Let's go.

[Johnny 'Johnny D' Robertson]

Three rounds, woman, and it's boxers. He's ready to go.

[Si Robertson]

He got KO'd in the first.

[Phil Robertson]

That was it. She wasn't in the mood. She knocked me out the first round.

[Johnny 'Johnny D' Robertson]

At a total combined weight of 100 pounds.

[Phil Robertson]

I woke up, my jaw was swollen. I said, what in the ace head happened?

[Si Robertson]

Yeah, at 17 seconds I knocked you out.

[Jase Robertson]

Oh, kids, if you're listening, ask your parents the questions she threw in the time. What else to say.

[Si Robertson]

Yeah, ask them something about birds and bees or something.

[Phil Robertson]

I don't know. That cures a lot of illnesses.

[Si Robertson]

That's what we here for. But look, this is kind of pre Thanksgiving, but y' all won't get it till after Thanksgiving, so happy Thanksgiving.

[Jase Robertson]

Hope you had a great one.

[Si Robertson]

Hope you had a great one. Yeah. No thankful for family. And now you can decorate for Christmas. You have okra.

[Phil Robertson]

That's right.

[Jase Robertson]

I already did.

[Johnny 'Johnny D' Robertson]

Go for it.

[Jase Robertson]

Philippians 4. 8. In the spirit of Psy and his positivity. Finally, brothers and sisters, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable, if anything is excellent or praiseworthy, think about such things and do it.

[Si Robertson]

Cling to it.

[Jase Robertson]

Cause be positive.

[Si Robertson]

Amen.

[Jase Robertson]

I'm gonna break my computer today, Sam.