Podcast Summary: "You CAN Experience ANY Emotion You Choose"

Podcast: Earn the Right to Live Your Dreams
Host: Dr. Coyte Cooper
Episode Date: September 7, 2021

Episode Overview

In this episode, Dr. Coyte Cooper explores the powerful idea that anyone can intentionally experience any emotion they desire—at any moment, by choice. Drawing on insights from coaching, neuroscience, and personal experience, he introduces the "CAN" framework—Condition, Apply, Neural Pave—as a concrete method for creating your desired emotional states. The episode is motivational, practical, and filled with relatable examples and actionable tools for listeners looking to upgrade their emotional lives.

Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. You Can Choose Your Emotional State ([00:25])

• Dr. Cooper introduces the concept: "You can experience any emotion that you want. And let me add this to it—at any moment that you choose."
• He shares how this realization was sparked by reading Tony Robbins and reinforced through his own coaching and personal growth journey.
• Emphasizes that many people believe they’re powerless over their emotions, but this mindset keeps them stuck.
  • “If you believe that you can’t, then you probably can’t.” ([01:00])

2. Your Brain Is Influenced by What You Expose It To ([02:10])

• Discusses how daily exposure to negative media, social media comparison, and drama conditions anxiety, fear, and self-doubt.
• By shifting what you feed your brain, you empower yourself to create uplifting emotions.
• “Our brain is going to over-respond to things as well. Our brain is going to find fear, our brain is going to find self doubt. Those are all things that are coming from what we're exposing our brain to.” ([02:45])

3. The CAN Framework for Emotional Mastery ([05:10])

C – Condition the Emotions You Want

• Identify Core Emotions: Pick 1–2 emotions you want to experience regularly, e.g., peace (calm, stillness, centered) and something else that excites you (adventure, daring, passion).
• Morning Routine: Use the “bookends” of your day—especially mornings—to focus intentional energy on these emotions before technology or outside inputs invade.
• Meditation & Breathwork: Practice transcendental or HRV breathing meditation, focusing on your keyword emotion with each inhale.
  • “When you're really emphasizing that, that's more likely to go into your subconscious brain.” ([09:20])
• Physiology: Use movement, posture, or gestures (clap, flex muscles, stretch arms wide) to physically anchor the desired state.

A – Apply It Throughout the Day

• Practice Makes Permanent: Like athletic skills, being patient or passionate must be practiced in real-life moments, until it becomes second nature.
• Real-Life Application: Find pockets of your day (e.g., with your kids, at work) to practice your chosen emotions—especially when circumstances are challenging.
  • “As a parent, that's super hard...and I have to remind myself, practice it, model it, take some deep breaths and remind yourself. Calm. Here, Coit.” ([16:20])
• Repetition & Exposure: Over time, the chosen state becomes not just something you visit, but who you are.

N – Neural Paving (Build Emotional Habits)

• Commit to Supportive Habits: Form daily habits that make your chosen state your “norm”—for peace: consistent meditation, mindful pauses in nature.
  • “When I'm in nature, I stop and take deep breaths and just soak it in...And the more that I do, the more it becomes my brain's norm, it looks for it.” ([19:45])
• Consistency is Key: Work as many angles as you can; with enough repetition, calm or adventure becomes your default mode.
• Acknowledge Progress: Be fully present, notice and celebrate when you provoke your state—it’s not arrogance, it’s evidence.

4. Beyond Habit: Creating an Emotional Lifestyle ([22:24])

• Habits vs. Lifestyle: Habits can be disrupted, but once your desired states are your lifestyle, they become your identity and belief system.
  • “You're a peaceful person. You're an adventure person. You're a passion person. It's just second nature.” ([23:20])
• Self-Acknowledgment: Each time you successfully evoke a chosen emotion, acknowledge it—this solidifies the neural pathways and accelerates long-term change.

5. The Power of Intentionally Chosen Emotions ([24:03])

• Emotions drive not just your own experience, but also your ability to positively influence and uplift others.
• “When you have the right emotions, you'll go out and you'll add value to others. And then all of a sudden, you'll start to attract more.” ([25:00])

6. Lessons from Viktor Frankl and ‘Man’s Search for Meaning’ ([27:00])

• Dr. Cooper references Frankl's ability to choose hope over despair in a concentration camp, illustrating the true depths of emotional choice.
  • “He might have briefly experienced those things, but he chose not to hang on…Instead he went over and...he says, ‘You know what I want to experience? I want to experience hope.’” ([28:00])
• This story underscores that emotion is a choice even amidst life’s hardest challenges.

Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• On Resistance:
  “First off, if you believe that you can't, then you probably can’t.” ([01:00])

• On Conditioning:
  “All we want to do is do that and acknowledge it, right? So you can repeat it. And then your quality of life is just staggering. It's just amazing.” ([06:55])

• On Emotional Outcomes:
  “Think about the emotions that I want to experience, and I chose those emotions and I pursued those emotions. And those were also emotions that would be conducive to the outcomes that I wanted. Think about how powerful that would be.” ([13:50])

• On Applying with Kids:
  “There are times where they push back. They're acting crazy sometimes like wild animals. And it takes a lot. And I have to remind myself, practice it, model it, take some deep breaths and remind yourself. Calm. Here, Coit.” ([16:15])

• On Neural Paving and Nature:
  “When I'm in nature, I stop and take deep breaths and just soak it in. I just stop and I feel that, and I experience that. And it brings me an incredible just feeling of peace. And I love it.” ([20:10])

• On Acknowledgment:
  “How cool is that? It's not an arrogant thing. It's just you go, wow, that's really cool. Look at that. We were able to do that. And if we can do that, that's evidence that we can not only do it once, but we can do it over and over, and we can do it with different emotions.” ([22:55])

• On Viktor Frankl:
  “He chose not to hang on to those things. And instead he went over and he says, you know what I want to experience? I want to experience hope.” ([28:05])

Timestamps for Major Segments

• 00:25 – Introduction to choosing your emotions
• 02:10 – Impact of media and technology on emotional state
• 05:10 – CAN Framework and step-by-step breakdown
• 09:20 – Meditation techniques for emotional conditioning
• 13:50 – Importance of choosing outcome-aligned emotions
• 16:15 – Real-life application: Parenting and patience
• 19:45 – Neural paving and turning emotions into habits
• 22:24 – Habit vs. lifestyle; how to make emotional mastery second nature
• 27:00 – Viktor Frankl’s story: The ultimate example of emotional choice

Actionable Takeaways

• Design Your Emotional State: Pick 1–2 emotions to condition every morning.
• Be Intentional about what content and experiences you consume—opt for those which nurture your chosen emotions.
• Pair Mental and Physical Practices (meditation, breathwork, movement) for greater impact.
• Practice in Real Life: Use daily moments and challenges as “reps” to anchor your emotion.
• Form Habits: Build daily rituals that make your desired state inevitable (neural paving).
• Acknowledge Your Wins to cement new emotional pathways.

In Dr. Cooper’s words:
“You will become a master at drumming up emotions. And really, when you're good at drumming up emotions, you have a special skill set—the master skill set to making your life vibrant and incredible.” ([30:08])