Emergency Intercom – "Drew kissed Ky"
Podcast: Emergency Intercom by iHeartPodcasts
Episode Date: January 9, 2026
Hosts: Enya Umanzor ("Kelly") and Drew Phillips ("Telma")
Episode Overview
This episode of Emergency Intercom blends the hosts’ signature chaotic energy with unexpectedly thoughtful reflections, pivoting between personal anecdotes, hot takes on gig work and tipping culture, and candid mental health talk. The big news teased in the episode’s title – Drew kissed Ky – is revealed, but it’s just one of many moments as the friends riff on everything from haircuts to therapy, New Year’s introspection, the ethics of tech companies, and the seemingly inescapable grind of modern life. Throughout, Enya and Drew maintain their irreverent, meme-ready delivery, peppering conversation with inside jokes and self-aware asides.
Segment Breakdown & Key Discussion Points
1. Catching Up: New Year, Haircuts, & Life Updates
[02:50–08:44]
- Reunion Energy: The hosts mention it’s been "two or three weeks" since they last spoke ([02:53]), setting a confessional, loose vibe.
- Drew's Hair Reveal: Drew reveals a "boy" haircut, admits it's shorter than expected and changes their face shape—Enya compares hiding behind hair and having a round face ([03:44–07:16]).
- Quote: "I want my haircut to look like a boy. I want—you're not a girl." – Drew, [04:11]
- Family & Aging: Enya talks about not knowing what they’ll look like as they age because of family trauma and loss ([07:56–08:38]).
- Dark Humor: "My mom's family is fully nuked by Big Pharma." – Enya, [08:01]
2. The Kiss Heard ‘Round the Pod: Drew Kissed Ky (And Others)
[08:44–10:01]
- Drew's New Year: Drew shares he wore his late brother’s shoes and microdosed mushrooms on NYE, then drops the major reveal: "I kissed Ky on New Year’s." ([08:44–09:21])
- Enya: "I thought you were going to say something actually sweet."
- Drew: "Me and Ky shared a kiss. Like, we went—" ([09:26])
- Also kissed: Rachel Sennott, Role Model.
- Enya: "So you were low-key tossed."
Drew: "No, I was passed around."
Enya: "I was passed around." ([09:58–10:00])
3. DoorDash/Postmates Exposé: The Reality of Gig Economy Work
[10:01–15:41]
- Viral Reddit Post: Drew reads and paraphrases a viral post—allegedly from a dissatisfied coder—exposing DoorDash/Postmates’ exploitative algorithms:
- Desperation is punished: drivers who accept low-paying orders are given worse ones ([11:13–12:39])
- The "tip bait": generous tippers’ money subsidizes the company, not drivers
- Impact: Both hosts express horror and guilt over supporting gig companies, especially given personal/family experience with service industry work:
- Quote: "Your generosity isn’t rewarding the driver, it’s subsidizing us, the coders. You’re paying their wage." – Drew, reading, [12:39]
- Discussion of changes in law (120% pay floor for gig drivers in LA) and how little that actually does for workers ([15:13–15:41])
- Personal angle: Enya’s family all works hospitality; tipping is survival ([14:25])
4. Moral Dilemmas & Economic Hopelessness
[15:52–22:36]
- Cycle of Poverty: Enya reflects on growing up without money; helping family financially while realizing the struggles never really end ([15:52–17:02]).
- "Everything is Avon": Discussion on how everyone is hustling—from gig work to TikTok drop-shipping to predictive markets and "gambling" online ([21:01–22:36])
- Raffles are illegal forms of gambling ("Even if it wasn’t for profit, still banned from Venmo for a $20 Oscars bet") ([23:35–24:46])
- Avon Lady-ification of work & Money Apps: Satirical pitch for a "Emergency Intercom Bank," mimicking neobank and MLM trends ([25:06–25:57])
5. AI, Manufactured Consent, and Internet Ethics
[26:02–28:29]
- Endless Monetization: They riff on creators doing AI ads and how that shapes public opinion ("manufactured consent") ([26:53–27:31])
- Quote: "If a small creator says yes and uses…then people are like, ‘oh, if they're using it, must be okay.’" – Drew, [26:59–27:31]
- Confusion over why anyone uses AI to this extent, suspicion of tech optimism, general doomerism ([27:31–28:23])
6. Family, Miami, and Crypto Bros
[28:29–30:41]
- Florida Upbringing: They joke about growing up in neighboring towns and the "plague" of crypto bros creeping up the Florida coast ([29:00–30:07])
- Crypto Bros and Economy: Rollicking roast of tech-bro culture – "they were all fucking balding losers… nasty, loner freak boys." ([30:15–30:41])
7. Queer Joy: ‘Heated Rivalry’ & TV Talk
[30:53–34:22]
- Gushing about ‘Heated Rivalry’ (queer hockey romance show): intense emotional response, rare positive gay representation ([31:34–34:09])
- Enya: "Never in my life cried at an episode of television the way I did at episode five." ([32:03])
- Other TV: Brief mentions of Righteous Gemstones, Mad Men, Sharp Objects, Big Little Lies ([34:43–35:14])
8. Therapy, Mental Health, and the Cost of Care
[36:17–42:58]
- Therapist Struggles: Enya and Drew trade stories about finding (and paying for) therapists; complaints include high out-of-pocket costs, insurance loopholes, therapists ending early, and boundary violations (e.g., therapist on social media) ([38:14–40:54]).
- Quote: "I want someone to look at me in the face and call me psycho and crazy, which I know a therapist won’t do…" – Drew, [37:30]
- Drew laments $300/hour; only a small amount is reimbursed via insurance ([39:01])
- Enya’s therapist laughs about being accused of "using her for money" ([42:42])
- Therapy Transparency: "If my therapist just quit and didn’t tell me, I’d 5150 her." ([37:15])
- Therapy as Friendship: Mutual desire for more connection/challenge from a therapist, not just someone who reflects back ([38:14–38:17])
9. Laughs, Farts, Genital Herpes, and Adulthood
[44:01–52:54]
- Bathroom Humor: Enya and Drew riff on farting in public baths, "front wedgies," and airplane bathroom shame ([50:16–52:08])
- On Herpes vs. Pregnancy: "I stigmatize pregnancy before I stigmatize herpes, unironic." ([62:09])
- Pregnancy fears trump all – both hosts freaked out by the concept ([62:05–62:12])
10. Media & Music Recs: What They're Loving Now
[62:05–64:25]
- Drew:
- "Love By Slime Pain if my son was gay" – a track about a dad’s hopes for his son’s sexuality
- "Time to Dance" and "The Shoes in September" by Agnes Obel (makes Drew cry) ([63:13])
- Enya:
- "There Must Be an Angel" by Eurythmics
- "Touch Me in the Morning" by Class Generation and more from their album ([63:56–64:25])
- TV:
- Both: still watching ‘Heated Rivalry’ and Righteous Gemstones.
Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments
-
"I kissed Ky on New Year's. Ew."
– Drew, breaking the titular news ([09:21]) -
"Your generosity isn’t rewarding the driver, it’s subsidizing us, the coders. You’re paying their wage."
– Drew, quoting the gig work exposé ([12:39]) -
"Everything is Avon. Everything is 8. Everything’s gonna become a bank soon, guys."
– Drew, on the proliferation of side hustles ([25:06]) -
"If my therapist just quit and didn’t tell me, I’d 5150 her."
– Enya, on therapy attachment ([37:15]) -
"I stigmatize pregnancy before I stigmatize herpes, unironic."
– Drew, deadpan ([62:09])
Timestamps for Key Segments
| Timestamp | Segment | |-------------|--------------------------------------------------------------| | 02:53–03:44 | First catch-up, hair revamp, and first friend energy | | 08:44–09:26 | Drew reveals kissing Ky on New Year’s Eve | | 11:13–12:39 | Gig work exploitation exposé and DoorDash/Postmates algorithm| | 14:25–15:41 | Tip culture, contract work, and LA gig worker law | | 18:06–18:24 | Shopify ad; light business chat (skip) | | 21:01–22:36 | Predictive markets as new-age gambling | | 26:02–27:31 | AI, manufactured consent, tech skepticism | | 30:53–34:22 | ‘Heated Rivalry’ TV show emotional deep-dive | | 36:17–42:58 | Therapy struggles, insurance gripes, cost of mental health | | 50:16–52:08 | Plane/bathroom talk, front wedgies explained | | 62:09–62:18 | Herpes vs. pregnancy stigma, "I stigmatize pregnancy..." | | 63:56–64:25 | Media and music recommendations |
Tone & Takeaways
The episode is raucous, self-aware, and emotionally unguarded. Moments of irreverence (prolapsed butthole humor, bathroom stories) are juxtaposed with authentic, often vulnerable talk about loss, mental health, and economic insecurity. Enya and Drew’s chemistry is on full display, and major personal revelations (like Drew’s kiss with Ky) are dropped as punchlines—the true focus is on shared experience in a changing, often absurd world.
For new listeners:
Expect stream-of-consciousness comedy, candid mental health talk, and pop culture commentary all in a single, sprawling conversation. This is a podcast that delivers both “no thoughts, just vibes” and small, blistering truths about being young-ish, queer, and online in 2026.
