Empty Netters Podcast: "Blue Jackets Mania Is Getting Hard To Ignore"

Almost Friday Media | April 9, 2026

Episode Overview

This high-energy episode finds the Empty Netters crew—brothers and ex-hockey players Dan and Chris Powers, joined by Evan—at their most electric as the 2026 NHL playoff race hits fever pitch. With unparalleled banter and in-depth knowledge, the hosts break down wild card chaos, dissect pivotal games, weigh which teams are true cup contenders versus frauds, and share their signature takes that blend reverence and irreverence for the game. They also dive into college hockey’s Frozen Four, the culture of hockey fandom, and all-new mascot and merch innovations. Light-hearted asides about hair, hangovers, and even the weekly "day of most sex" ranking add color throughout.

Episode Structure

1. Chirping and Banter (00:00–01:35)
2. Main NHL Discussion & Wild Card Chaos (01:35–29:00)
3. Playoff “Who Can Make a Run?” Segment (29:00–47:00)
4. Frozen Four & College Hockey Preview (42:32–45:34)
5. Utah Mammoth "Zamoth" Zamboni Segment (45:34–49:40)
6. Picks from the Professors—Betting & Parlay Parlays (49:40–61:27)
7. Sex by Day of the Week (67:00–80:56)
8. Trivia & Outro (80:56–End)

Key Discussion Points

The Blue Jackets & Wild Card Insanity (01:35–29:00)

• James Hagan’s Entry-Level Deal: The Bruins sign top prospect and hometown hero James Hagan, boosting playoff energy in Boston. The hosts geek out over his potential:

  "My expectations for this kid are so high. Justifiably so." — Evan (02:21)
  "This is the shot of adrenaline a team needs going into the playoffs." — Dan Powers (03:02)

• Wild Card Race Breakdown:

  • The Eastern Conference wild card race is described as “the drunkest wild card race we have ever seen,” with the Sens, Jackets, Flyers, Wings, and Islanders in a dogfight.
  • The hosts run through recent results—emphasizing close games, regulation wins as crucial for tiebreakers, and highlight-clutch performances (03:09–13:42).
  • Praise for players like Zach Werenski’s nasty shootout finish:

    "That was just a bad loss for Detroit…But here's the reality now, boys: Four and O or you're dead." — Dan Powers (09:56)

• Flyers’ Surprising Surge:

  • The Flyers are on a heater, led by scrappy play; Travis Konecny, Zegras, and Mitchkoff carrying the offense.

  "Best team in the league right now. It’s a thing of beauty." — Dan Powers (14:14)

• Sabres, Jets, and Others:

  • Sabres “want it so bad” and Jets are finally healthy—a reminder 'heli' (Hellebuyck) is a difference-maker.

Notable Segment

• Memorable Quote - Wild Card Craziness:

  "We are already in playoffs, folks. Every game matters." — Dan Powers (05:59)

• Historical Perspective:
  Discussing franchise history and high draft picks for Boston—doubling down on the local-boy narrative.

Playoff Run Likelihoods: Contenders, Spoilers, and Frauds (29:00–47:00)

• "Can They Go On a Run?"

  • The hosts play a lightning round for each playoff and bubble team:

    • Tampa Bay, Buffalo, Montreal, Carolina, Pittsburgh, and Boston: "Yes, absolutely."
    • Flyers, Sens, Predators, Kings: "Probably not, can win a round but not a run."
    • Blue Jackets & Red Wings: "No, frauds watch."
    • Senators praised for fighting spirit but doubted for a deep run.

  • Criteria: Making the conference final = “made a run.”

• Honest, Player-centric Takes:

  • Teams with elite goaltending (e.g., Islanders with Sorokin, Jets with Hellebuyck) given credit as dark horses.
  • Age and health of teams like the Penguins could be their undoing:

    "Completely contingent on health, because they're old." — Chris Powers (33:13)

• Calling Out Frauds:

  "We put them on fraud watch and they are fraud." — Chris Powers on the Red Wings (35:03)

• Emotional Fan Engagement:
  “Penguins-Flyers will feed families in the Rust Belt.” — Dan Powers (15:43)

Timestamps

• Tampa/Atlantic playoff breakdown: 22:20–24:57
• Western conference wild card math: 24:57–29:00

Betting, Parlay Insanity & Picks from the Professors (49:40–61:27)

• The “Professors” Segment:

  • End-of-season mega-parlays and “Friday Fades.”
  • The crew recaps last week's picks: “We always could do worse and we strive to do worse in the future.” — Dan Powers (51:23)
  • Detailed run-through of their strategy for a fade and a "reverse parlay”—picking both sides for chaos.

• Life on the Line Picks:

  • “Bruins, Isles, Pens, Kings, Wings, Blues, Wild, Stars, Mammoth, Leafs, Jackets, Jets, Spunk, Nights, Sharks—live on a fucking beach. Holy shit.” — Dan Powers (61:08)

• Saturday Selly Pick:
  Chosen: Sidney Crosby to score in potential last matchup vs. Ovechkin (56:56–57:22).

College Hockey Frozen Four Preview (42:32–45:34)

• College Hockey Energy:
  Michigan, Denver, North Dakota, Wisconsin are in Vegas for the Frozen Four—"That's college hockey."
  • Score predictions, bracket talk, and the mythic juju of Michigan’s cross-sport championship momentum.
  • Bet and emotional takes about the NCAA championship, with the banter as sharp as ever.

Notable Quote

"I think Michigan basketball winning helps the hockey team. I genuinely do." — Evan (44:09)

Hockey Culture: Utah Mammoth "Zamoth" & Fans (45:34–49:40)

• Utah Mammoth Zamboni (“Zamoth”):
  • The team reveals a custom mammoth-themed Zamboni.

  "It looks like a fucking cyber truck elephant…he is the Caesar Marcus Aurelius wanted to be." — Dan Powers (46:04)

  • Praise for owner Ryan Smith: “When it comes to fan service, this guy is a servant of the people.”

Memorable Quotes & Moments

“Day of the Week: Most Sex”

• The hosts hilariously attempt to rank days of the week by frequency of sex, with strong opinions on Sunday morning hangover sex vs. Friday and Saturday nights.
  • “Sunday is probably the day of the week that has the least amount of sex.”
  • "You are so wrong. I would say fat, boozy sex is 90% of sex had in this country." — Evan (70:08)
  • "Catholics have like 10 kids a family—they do it all." — Chris Powers (79:58)

Important Timestamps

• [02:03] Hagan entry-level contract discussion—Bruins playoff energy
• [05:50] "Drunkest wild card race" begins—running through playoff situations
• [13:45] Wild Card “Cyclical Streakiness” (Detroit’s patterns)
• [14:50] Flyers, Zegras, Mitchkoff—scrappy Philly praise
• [15:43] “Penguins-Flyers will feed families in the Rust Belt.”
• [21:10] Negative goal differential records—historical context
• [24:21] Eastern/Atlantic standings, regulation wins as tiebreakers
• [29:00] Playoff “Can They Make a Run?” Lightning round
• [42:32] Frozen Four college hockey preview and fan juju
• [45:34] Utah Mammoth “Zamoth” Zamboni segment
• [49:40] “Picks from the Professors”—betting/fade segment
• [67:00] “Day of the week sex” extended tangent
• [81:12] NHL Player trivia/factorial game

Overall Tone and Language

• Language: Pure bro-energy, tons of hockey jargon, expletives, and locker-room humor.
• Tone: Irreverent, deeply passionate about hockey, relentlessly fun and self-deprecating.

Podcast Quotable Highlights

• On playoff atmosphere:

  “We are already in playoffs, folks. Every game matters.” — Dan Powers (05:59)

• On Zach Werenski:

  “I have said many times, if Boosh finishes with, you know, mid-90 points, then people might look past the turnovers and give him the Norris. That Warunsky is the Norris one. It’s not even close.” — Dan Powers (12:41)

• On Flyers’ hot streak:

  “Best team in the league right now. It’s a thing of beauty.” — Dan Powers (14:14)

• On the wild card:

  “You have two feral animals in a cage, fighting for points.” — Dan Powers (09:56)

• On Utah Mammoth "Zamoth":

  “He brought hockey to Utah and then immediately gave it to the people.” — Dan Powers (46:41)
  “It looks like a fucking cyber truck elephant. But I love it.” — Chris Powers (46:00)

Conclusion / Summary

This episode is quintessential Empty Netters—deeply knowledgeable, hilarious, and fan-centered. The wild card race is broken down in exhilarating detail, with real-time playoff math; prospects like James Hagan and players like Zach Werenski are celebrated; and fan-favorite segments like "Picks from the Professors" deliver both info and entertainment. There’s fresh NHL culture (the Zamoth!), plenty of bro-science, a memorable sex-day-ranking debate, and a stumper of a trivia round. It’s a must-listen for any hockey obsessive, especially as the playoff chaos builds to a head.

For diehards and casuals alike, this episode of Empty Netters is a perfect blend of high-stakes hockey analysis and unfiltered locker-room fun.