The Stars and Jason Robertson Decide To Date For One More Year

Summary

---

Empty Netters Podcast – Episode Summary

Podcast: Empty Netters
Host: Almost Friday Media
Episode Title: The Stars and Jason Robertson Decide To Date For One More Year
Date: July 23, 2026

---

Main Theme & Purpose

This episode delivers the Empty Netters’ signature blend of NHL news and banter, focusing heavily on the Dallas Stars’ one-year contract extension with Jason Robertson. The hosts debate the implications of this “band-aid” deal for both Robertson and the franchise, and broaden the discussion to roster construction, cap management, and the shifting market dynamics in the NHL. Additional segments highlight emerging teams, the state of the Philadelphia Flyers, cultural conversations about hockey contracts, team-building, lifestyles, and favorite sandwiches and snacks.

---

Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Dallas Stars & Jason Robertson’s One-Year Deal

• [05:15–18:03] The central story: Jason Robertson signs a one-year, $12 million AAV deal with Dallas, matching Miko Rantanen. The hosts riff on whether this is a “band-aid” fix or an intentional bridge to a much bigger contract next summer.
  • Band-aid or Plan?
    • “Is this a situation where we have a couple who's dating and they have just found another way to just put a band aid on their situation... or is this what we’ve always wanted?” – Dan, [05:37]
    • “This is either a couple having a baby to solve their issues, or this was all just a cap crunch situation and they finally figured it out.” – Dan, [06:24]
    • Consensus: It’s likely a cap-related solution, with bigger money movement (especially Tyler Seguin’s contract) freeing up space for a longer deal next year.
  • What’s Next?
    • The possibility of Robertson bolting for free agency is debated, but the hosts ultimately lean toward him staying a Star long-term—unless he has a down year or wants to test the market.
    • “If Robo… has a down year, is he like, God damn it, or does he go, I don’t give a shit...you’re still paying me, dude.” – Dan, [13:57]
    • “It would be very interesting if they play through this year and he doesn't sign until summer because he's like, ‘fuck you dude, you only gave me a one year deal.’” – Dan, [15:54]
  • Impact on Roster Construction
    • With Seguin’s deal coming off the books, Dallas gains flexibility but faces questions about their evolving core.
    • “They have a very good top nine, but it has been passed by some teams.” – Sean, [11:05]
    • The group wonders aloud about Dallas’s playoff mentality: “They need to stop being pussy in the playoffs.” – Sean, [12:04]

---

2. NHL Cap Management & Culture

• [18:26–22:10] The rise of “culture contracts” vs. standard market deals.
  • The Florida Panthers’ ability to re-sign core stars below market value ("the Panthers tax discount") is admired as a product of culture, not just favorable state-tax situations.
    • “If Brady Tkachuk signs for less than Barkov at or less than 10, it is officially... [that] the Florida Panthers are different.” – Dan, [21:37]
    • The group contrasts this to situations in Dallas and elsewhere, where players (like Robo and Rantanen) still push for top-dollar deals in no-tax states.
  • “Players want market value and then they just get to go—added bonus, my state’s no state tax—instead of going, I should take less than market.” – Sean, [19:35]
• Rising Cap Ceilings: The ever-evolving standards for top contracts, especially for defensemen, are discussed in passing.

---

3. Roster Architecture / Young Teams to Watch

• Utah NHL Franchise [26:06–31:20]
  • Strong praise for the new Utah roster, built on long-term deals (Marino, Sergachev, etc.), and a great city/culture for players.
    • “For me, Salt Lake City is gas...getting to go live there and that roster...” – Sean, [28:05]
    • Facility and lifestyle appeal highlighted (“team steam room,” mountains, restaurants).
• Philadelphia Flyers [31:39–41:58]
  • The Flyers’ smart cap management and timely extensions for Zegras, Drysdale, and others set them up as a surging up-and-comer with $14 million in cap space still available.
    • “I am here to say, [the Flyers] are fucking back.” – Dan, [34:14]
    • “This team is legitimate... they have no excuse if they regress because this team is full of young guys who already performed.” – Sean, [35:03]
    • The Mitchkov contract situation is flagged as a potential home-run opportunity if they are proactive.

---

4. Fun Segments, Banter & Tangents

Haircuts, Hygiene & Dreadlocks

• Opening segment dives into Sean’s hair woes, bathing habits, and wild stories about forming dreadlocks (with jokes about “high school grunge”).

Deep-Dive: Sandwiches & Ice Cream Truck Picks

• [44:20–68:16] The hosts review a giant lineup of classic sandwiches—ranking everything from Thanksgiving and Reuben to BLT, Cubano, Croque Monsieur, and more.
  • Memorable banter:
    • “The Thanksgiving [sandwich] is the one that is getting me sexually aroused more than anything.” – Dan, [48:25]
    • Egg Salad vs. Chicken Salad debate: “One of the great sandwiches of all time!” – Sean, [59:41]
• Ice Cream nostalgia [68:34–72:51]
  • Animated debate about best ice cream truck treats (Ninja Turtle faces, Drumsticks, Snickers bars, and the controversial fruit pops).
  • “You are an absolute... if you get the frozen fruit pop. I would not be friends with you.” – Dan, [72:29]

---

Fraud Watch & Top Hits (Weekly Segment) [73:05–98:16]

• Fraud Watch:
  • Big beers (CP): “Any beer bigger than [a 16oz pint] can fuck itself. All that happens is it gets warm. Warm beer is appalling.” – Chris, [73:05]
  • Camping (Dan): “Camping is so awesome until that moment [you sleep in a tent].” – Dan, [76:27]
  • Astrology (Chris): “I think it’s just cosmic racism. It’s just discrimination for the girlies.” – Chris, [81:06]
    • “When you tell [astrology folks] a different star sign, they’ll always find a way to make it fit.” – Dan, [81:53]
• Top Hits:
  • Light dimmers (Sean): “Dimming a light is so sick...we should be dimming lights more.” – Sean, [85:54]
  • Sitting at the bar alone (Dan): “Going and sitting at the bar whether you’re alone or with a couple is, like, you just are forced to speak to people. And it’s so delightful.” – Dan, [88:43]
  • Rubber playground/sidewalk material (Chris): “That should be every sidewalk. It feels so nice to walk on!” – Chris, [92:40]

---

Blind Rankings/Pop Culture

• [99:19–108:55] Blind ranking of movie theater snacks:
  • Order: Dots (5), Sour Patch Kids (2), Peanut M&Ms (4), Popcorn (1), Peanut Butter M&Ms (3)
  • “There’s nothing like sitting in a movie theater eating popcorn and washing it down with a nice, crisp Sprite.” – Dan, [102:33]

---

Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• “This is either a couple having a baby to solve their issues, or this was all just a cap crunch situation and they finally figured it out.” – Dan, [06:24]
• “Dallas…need to stop being baby-back bitches in the playoffs.” – Dan, [12:09]
• “If Brady Tkachuk signs for less than Barkov at or less than 10, it is officially... Florida Panthers are different.” – Dan, [21:36]
• “I am here to say, [the Flyers] are fucking back.” – Dan, [34:14]
• “Camping is so awesome until that moment [when you have to sleep in a tent].” – Dan, [76:27]
• “I think astrology is just cosmic racism. It’s just discrimination for the girlies.” – Chris, [81:06]
• “Dimming a light is so sick...we should be dimming lights more.” – Sean, [86:51]
• “Going and sitting at the bar whether you’re alone or with a couple is, like, you just are forced to speak to people. And it’s so delightful.” – Dan, [88:43]

---

Timestamps for Key Segments

• Jason Robertson and Dallas Stars extension: [05:15–18:03]
• NHL cap/culture talk (Florida, Dallas): [18:26–22:10]
• Young team construction (Utah, Flyers): [26:06–41:58]
• Sandwich rankings/debate: [44:20–68:16]
• Ice cream truck picks: [68:34–72:51]
• Fraud Watch / Top Hits: [73:05–98:16]
• Blind ranking: Movie theater snacks: [99:19–108:55]

---

Overall Tone & Vibe

As always, the Empty Netters weave deep hockey analysis with playful sibling chemistry, wild digressions, and a beer-league player’s irreverence. The banter is loose and rapid-fire, with a healthy dose of self-aware self-deprecation.

---

For listeners:
This episode balances sharp hockey insight (especially on cap strategy and young team building) with fun, in-depth pop culture tangents—an essential Empty Netters listen for NHL fans and anyone seeking laughs with their sports news.

---

Transcript

[Dan Powers]

Welcome to the Empty Netters podcast.

[Sean]

Can you believe what this has become? There was a full 48 hours where

[Chris]

I felt like I was, like, literally Superman.

[Dan Powers]

Jumbo loves playing Fortnite.

[Chris]

So does he gets on the sticks.

[Dan Powers]

Did TR show you the saunacycle, or was that all you did?

[Sean]

No, I invented that. Almost a year now that I haven't

[Chris]

taken a body check.

[Sean]

That's kind of nice.

[Dan Powers]

So we are back. We are horned up, and we are going deep.

[Chris]

Finished tonight with some chicken fingers and a few Guinnesses. Ran into you guys.

[Dan Powers]

That's where this pod came to life. Ice is ready. We're back with another episode of the Empty Netters podcast, brought to you by BetMGM. I'm your host, Dan Powers. We got the buff man on the sticks.

[Sean]

Hey. Wow.

[Dan Powers]

Full of smiles today.

[Chris]

Full smiles, a lot more energy.

[Dan Powers]

We've got our amazing horse Troy here.

[Sean]

His name is Troy. Of course it is. Of course it is. I didn't think about that, but of course his name is Troy.

[Dan Powers]

And then over here, CP who needs

[Sean]

a haircut, as always. Yeah, I was trying to figure out when to do it.

[Dan Powers]

I have an idea. Anytime.

[Sean]

Right now?

[Dan Powers]

Yeah.

[Sean]

Let's pause this. Cut it all off, go get one. It is so annoying right now.

[Dan Powers]

Yeah, it's awful.

[Sean]

Oh, my God, it's so hot.

[Dan Powers]

It's so long.

[Sean]

It's, like, itchy.

[Dan Powers]

Yeah. I bet it's because you don't bathe either. Most people know you don't take showers.

[Sean]

Swim, go in the ocean, boom, come out. Are dreadlocks literally, do they form on their own, or do you like cornrows? You get done? No.

[Dan Powers]

Well, you can form. I actually shout out. TK Was once such a grungy, grimy piece of shit in high school that he literally started forming a dreadlock because he wasn't showering, which is just. I don't even know. I can't even process it. But proper dreadlocks, I believe you use, like, awesome specific beeswax. And you. You, like, work them.

[Chris]

Like, my.

[Dan Powers]

My boy Asa in college had unbelievable dreads, and so did his brother. And I actually remember so clearly vividly when his brother cut his dreads. It was like a family thing. Like, his mom was like, what have you done? And then Asa was like, should I do it? And Asa did. Oh, he looked so good. Like, it was just like. I mean, he looked good both ways.

[Sean]

Because dread, like dreadlocks naturally is kind of gnarly.

[Dan Powers]

It's kind of gnarly.

[Sean]

I don't like that.

[Dan Powers]

But when you use the proper wax

[Sean]

if you're making that.

[Dan Powers]

I like that because, like, you. Ace's mom was so good at doing dreads. Like, she could.

[Sean]

Yeah.

[Dan Powers]

You know, she was awesome. She was a. I. I don't know if she did it professionally, but she could have. And, I mean, she made Asa and his brother's hair look out of control.

[Sean]

Good.

[Dan Powers]

Like, the dreads were amazing. There were beads in them and shit.

[Sean]

Is it.

[Dan Powers]

Is it specific?

[Sean]

Like, is it much? I think it's easier with black person's hair. But is it possible with my hair or is it, like, literally. No, no, it's possible.

[Chris]

I've seen white people with dreads.

[Sean]

Me, too. But I feel. Have different hair. Like, they don't have. Like, I have pretty. It's not thin.

[Chris]

Yeah.

[Dan Powers]

Their hair is more lush.

[Chris]

Full.

[Sean]

Yeah. Like, I don't know if you could, like, you could do it.

[Chris]

I think many people would describe your hair as lushful and thick.

[Sean]

Okay. All right. You dread my hair.

[Dan Powers]

Your hair is definitely lighter, though.

[Sean]

Maybe we could dread it instead of cutting it.

[Dan Powers]

I don't think you'd look great with that. You'd look like Christina Aguilera when she did it.

[Sean]

Oh, my God, what a good comp. Dan. Hold on.

[Dan Powers]

And she looked good.

[Sean]

How do I not do this? That is so funny. I think, too, she has a little bit of the.

[Dan Powers]

God, she looked special.

[Sean]

She has a little bit of the white person. Went on a cruise.

[Chris]

Yep.

[Dan Powers]

100. Went on a Caribbean cruise. Came back with dreads.

[Sean]

They're now back from.

[Dan Powers]

Yeah. But it was mostly. What were those? I mean, they weren't necessarily cornrows that, like the girl. Girls that would go and get the tight braids on their skull. Yeah, that was the Caribbean cruise vibe.

[Sean]

Anaya said something in Love island when they first met Titi, and she had, like, the side. Yeah. And she was like, of course I'm losing my man to the girl with the blanks. And I was like, damn, that was a cool thing. I don't know what that is.

[Dan Powers]

And her hair looked amazing.

[Chris]

Yeah.

[Dan Powers]

But anyway, you need a cut, dude.

[Sean]

Yeah, I know I need a cut, and I'm going to do it because it's going to. I'm getting married in a year, and I'm going to cut it really short when I go get it cut that way. I have. If I want to grow it out.

[Dan Powers]

You want long hair at your wedding?

[Sean]

I don't know. I'm just going to give myself the opportunity.

[Dan Powers]

Got it. Got it.

[Sean]

Because if I, you know. Yeah. Cut it now have a year to grow it out if I want. And then otherwise.

[Dan Powers]

Otherwise you got to have that. I mean, again, your. Your hair has a sweet spot and you never let the sweet spot exist.

[Sean]

Grows too fast. One day.

[Dan Powers]

Yeah, that's why you just cut it again. Cut it. Keep cutting it to the sweet spot.

[Sean]

Every day.

[Dan Powers]

No, like once a month.

[Sean]

No, no, too fast. Be gone in a week. How about every two weeks maybe?

[Dan Powers]

This is great. This is what you should do.

[Sean]

God, who has the money, Sean?

[Chris]

In this economy, You.

[Sean]

Who has the money to cut your hair every two weeks?

[Dan Powers]

This is ridiculous. All right, we got some fun stuff today in this episode. Great hockey news. We got some signings, we've got some Philly talk, and then we've got some fun stuff. We're here with Sean again, of course. We're going to have some fun and get into some debates. It's going to be great. Starting off, Jason Robertson.

[Sean]

The saga is finally continuing. Continuing. Not over at all.

[Dan Powers]

I actually don't think it's going to continue. I think it is done. But Jason Robertson signs with the Dallas Stars, at least for the next season. The saga is over. One year, $12 million a year. He's going to be a UFA next season.

[Sean]

Yep.

[Dan Powers]

He signs for exactly the same thing as Miko Rantin. And here we are. He's coming back to Dallas. The question I have for you is, is this a situation where we have a couple who's dating and they have just found another way to just put a band aid on their situation, or is this a. No, no, no. This is what we've always wanted, obviously, but with the Tyler Sagan deal, with some of the stuff we've got going on, it's just been. It's been a bit of a pinch. And now you agreeing to a one year deal will get us through the pinch. We'll sign you for even more than that next year after Sagan's deal comes off the books and we're all going to be happy and we're going to live happily ever after.

[Sean]

That's actually an incredible question because it is one of those two things.

[Dan Powers]

Dude.

[Chris]

Dude, it is.

[Dan Powers]

This is either this is either a couple having a baby to solve their issues, or this was all just a cap crunch situation and they finally figured it out.

[Sean]

I hope that it's the latter because he is so good.

[Dan Powers]

He's so good.

[Sean]

This. This whole song and dance, dog and pony show. I wanted one more of those twofers. Song and dance, dog and pony rigamarole. That's really one thing.

[Dan Powers]

That's a good one.

[Sean]

Rigamarole has made no sense from day fucking negative 10. It has made no sense that Miko Ray or Miko Randon, that Jason Robertson wasn't a person, that whatever team has him was a priority. It has got to be the only good player in the league. The only really good player in the league that presumably his own team doesn't want to.

[Dan Powers]

Yeah.

[Sean]

Is there anyone else that you can think of like that?

[Dan Powers]

Not. I mean, there's plenty of good players that. Again, allegedly. Allegedly. There's been a. There's been plenty of great players that are like on the trade block. We've saw players get trade. I mean, Jordan Cairo got traded and he's been a very good player for the Blues. He's been a very good player for the Blues. Chris, don't make that fucking stinky face. He's been a very good player for the Blues. So we see this plenty where a good player is being shopped around and it's not because they have requested a trade. By the way, did you see the pictures of Larks at the World cup final with the boys?

[Sean]

No.

[Dan Powers]

It's him, Cole, a couple other guys, and they're just shirtless in the stands at the World cup final. And Larks looks like he's having the time of his life. And looking at the comments, and not even just the comments, but looking at Detroit outlets that have posted the photo and the way that Detroit fans have turned on him is so funny. Like people are. They've just been. They've gone full heel.

[Sean]

I don't blame them.

[Dan Powers]

No.

[Sean]

And who did I say, like, this was going to happen to someone soon. I forget who I just said, but someone. Oh, oh, Marinsky.

[Chris]

Yeah.

[Sean]

Marinsky's like, I would like to win a cup here. And I'm like this, he is gone. He's going to ask for a trade in two years and then everyone close is going to go, we hate him.

[Dan Powers]

Disavow, disavow, Disavow.

[Sean]

Okay, so, yeah, this is ridiculous. I hope deeply that this is because, dude, and if it is, good job. Because if the whole issue was like, man, we want to sign you long term, but we just can't this year. The books don't work this year, so it's fucking us.

[Chris]

Yeah.

[Sean]

This is an incredible solution where I go, hey, dude, just take a fucking one year deal that will work and then we'll just take care of it. In fact, how did it take so long to get here? How is this option Just being floated out now.

[Dan Powers]

Yeah, well, I mean, so here's the thing. They've got $2 million in bonus carryover overages. That's gonna come off.

[Sean]

The fuck does that mean?

[Dan Powers]

It's like buyouts. Okay, so they got 2 million in buyouts. That's coming off the books. They will have 9.8 million in Tyler Sagan's deal off the books, and then robos 12 million. And after that, they're actually pretty good. It's all a lot of depth pieces at 2 million.

[Sean]

Roster construction is top.

[Dan Powers]

Well, I. I'm not entirely sure I agree with that. And then you got. You got Bishop, Leon Bishl, who I actually really like. You're going to. He's an RFA next year, so you're going to have to sign him. So really, you're kind of looking at Bishell, Robo and a backup goalie. And you will need to replace Sagan, because here's the. Here's the thing about Dallas. We talk all about Dallas and how great Dallas is. They are. Their top two lines right now

[Chris]

are

[Dan Powers]

pretty much a combination of Robo hints and Rantman, Wyatt Johnson, Tyler Sagan, and Sam Steele. Like, if you want to put Rokovian, Justin Rakovian up there, who's a good little player. Yeah, sure, maybe, but we'll see. But they. I don't know, man. Like, we talk about teams, top nines all the time. Obviously, Dutchy's good and you've got.

[Sean]

He's been great.

[Dan Powers]

You've got Ben in there still. And then you've got Fox, Akivi Ranta and Oscar Bach, who are probably going to be your fourth line. But that. That top nine is really good. Really good. I don't think I put it with some of the other top nines we've been talking about recently.

[Sean]

I hear you that it kind of has been passed by some teams, definitely. And that's because I used to have Sagan and Ben.

[Dan Powers]

As such, Sagan and Ben were like, top six. I was like, this is incredible. And now I'm like, no, Ben on the third line. Kind of makes sense to me. And we have just no idea what SAGS is gonna do.

[Sean]

They've been passed. They're still good, but they have been passed. And, buddy, this. The Aves get to go. We always are like, God, the AVs, how have they not won more? But. But at least they go, well, we won.

[Dan Powers]

Yes.

[Sean]

You know, it's kind of like the Celtics right now, where I'm like, you're a clown show.

[Dan Powers]

But they're like, they got one.

[Sean]

This Dallas team is a bagel away from me being like, what the fuck did you just do with this era of Dallas Stars hockey?

[Dan Powers]

I know, man. I just don't. I don't know what they need, basically. I genuinely don't know what they need.

[Sean]

I don't know. Move to a different division.

[Dan Powers]

Stop it.

[Sean]

First of all. Second of all, they need to stop being pussies.

[Dan Powers]

Yes.

[Sean]

In the playoffs.

[Dan Powers]

They do need to stop being baby back bitches. And you just got. And by that, Dallas, we just mean get over the hump. Just.

[Sean]

Dude, playoffs are hard, dude. You have to win. You have to win a tough series.

[Dan Powers]

You know what rattles me with Dallas is throughout this whole thing.

[Chris]

So.

[Dan Powers]

Okay, so going back to robot. Yeah, it's. I love that Robo's back. We've been saying. We've been saying from the beginning. It is insane that they're considering moving this guy. He's an amazing player. He's been so consistent his entire career. Robo is back for at least a year. January 1st. You imagine that they'll start talking extension with him and get it figured out. But my question is, what. What is the issue? Because there was a trade to Seattle that was accepted.

[Sean]

Yeah.

[Dan Powers]

And Robo said no. What was it? 15 mil a year?

[Sean]

I think so. Yeah.

[Dan Powers]

So, like, that's tough for Seattle that you're like, okay. Robo is so actively like, I do not want to play there. I will take 3 million. I mean, it's after. Or actually they're. No state tax, too.

[Sean]

Yeah, but remember, they got that new tax, though. There was that some. Some millionaire tax.

[Dan Powers]

Millionaire billionaire tax. I. My big wonder for them is what is. I don't know what Dallas is doing. Because they make that trade. Robo says no. They're also talking about trading Thomas Harley, who they just signed. And I bet Thomas Harley's like, what the fuck? He's like 50 Cent. He's like. He said, fuck. Fuck Fitty. What did I do? Like, I bet Thomas Harley during that process was like, what? I'm on the block. So I just. I don't really get what Dallas is doing. Like, to me, it felt like they. This summer were kind of like, we need to.

[Sean]

We gotta blow it.

[Dan Powers]

We gotta.

[Sean]

It's all over. We gotta shake the tree.

[Dan Powers]

Yeah, maybe they do.

[Sean]

Maybe they do. That's what's even fucking crazier.

[Dan Powers]

Maybe they do. So I'm glad Robo's back. I am very curious. What is the move here? Are you freaking out? Are you do you feel confident going into the season? Dallas fans, if you're Dallas, do you feel confident going into the season? And then here's the big one, buddy. If Robo, for the first time in his career, frankly, in my opinion, has a down year, is he like, God damn it so. Or does he go, I don't give a shit if I had a down year. I know exactly what I'm worth. You're still paying me X, dude.

[Sean]

So I'm so glad you just brought that up. I think a couple things to answer a lot of the questions. I think Dallas is nervous. If I'm a Dallas fan, I would be nervous. I don't think you're particularly better this year than you have been in the past couple years.

[Dan Powers]

Yeah.

[Sean]

So it's not like, oh my God, you better win this year, but you kind of really do want to win this year because you're entering a new phase shift a little bit. I think he, if he starts, it's kind of funny. Like, you know, when you're a senior, I guess in high school you're only your first term grades really matter because then you just apply to college. Like doesn't matter. Everything else they don't even see for him it's like October to January 1st.

[Dan Powers]

Yeah.

[Sean]

Is your contract.

[Chris]

Yeah.

[Sean]

How you perform now. But like you said, if he has a bad start, maybe Dallas will go, dude, oh, we're not paying you that much. But if I'm him, I go, well, someone will. So good day.

[Dan Powers]

And your ufa.

[Sean]

Yeah. So he knows what he's worth.

[Chris]

Yeah.

[Sean]

Even if he has a bad year, it just, I think could be with someone else.

[Dan Powers]

Yeah.

[Sean]

He has a bad year.

[Dan Powers]

I would imagine that Robo is, is going to be in Dallas forever. That's what I would bet on. That I agree. Yeah, that's what I would bet on. However. However, I get really excited at the prospect of a big swinging dick UFA for the first time in a lot.

[Sean]

This would be awesome.

[Dan Powers]

It would be very interesting if they play through this year and he doesn't sign until summer because he's like, fuck you, dude. You know, you only gave me a one year deal. And again, maybe there's a chance that he is very happy with this and he's like, yep, I get it. Like, this is what we had to do to figure this out. But I know that makes me, it makes me excited.

[Sean]

And I'll tell you what, for Dallas and I'm not being like your windows closing. And again, I just said I don't Think you're that good this year that you have to win in the way that maybe the Aves had to win last year. But if you don't win this year and he doesn't get signed right. I, man, I am like, bro, because what's he gonna cost all of a sudden? And we think he's an incredible player, but all of a sudden if you don't win this year and then he's UFA and you gotta keep him and you extend him and now you have Jason Robertson for what, 14? Like, is he gonna get 14 million?

[Dan Powers]

I know, it's interesting. You know, there I, There are a bunch of people asking if he signed this, why didn't he just sign a 5 by this or a 7 by this?

[Sean]

Because clearly he's like, I'm getting more.

[Dan Powers]

Exactly. And the answer, folks is because the 12 million on the cap this year works. They're currently 1.3 mil over. So they've got a little bit of maneuvering, but that's easy. But if he did sign a long term, five to seven years, it was going to be more than 12 and that wouldn't have worked at the cap. So that's why you do this. So Robo is kind of doing them a favor. And if you're Robo doing them a favor, that's why I don't even think it matters if he gets to a slow start.

[Sean]

I know.

[Dan Powers]

Or if he gets injured, because I think he's going to look at them and go, suck me. Yeah, I did you a favor. We didn't go to arbitration. I signed a one year deal. You are paying. Yeah. I do wonder. This is a LEO situation where he could have just gone, yeah, dude, give me seven by 12. It's a fuck ton of money. And I'm gonna sign for exactly what Rantman signs for. And we're taking less. And we're gonna build a machine here just like Florida is. This is him actively, which I respect. Him actively going, no, I'm worth more than that. I want more than that.

[Sean]

Yeah, yeah.

[Dan Powers]

So it's, you know, we're, again, we're just, we're seeing more and more of this. It's even in these no tax states, like people always want to. About that. Well, it. News flash, folks, it is not just about that that we always give a double wrist or to Zito in Florida. Because it is their culture that gets these guys to agree to way lower deals.

[Sean]

Yeah.

[Dan Powers]

Because here we are in Dallas, they are not agreeing to way lower deals. A lot of people said rant and it's 12 was. I mean, it was literally lower than what he was getting offered elsewhere. Right. Like in Carolina, he got offered more, he took less in Dallas, but it's still not way, way less. You know, like they've got him at 12, Robo at 12, Harley at 10.5, Haskin in at 8.4. Like Haskin in his low. Yeah, but that again, that was signed a while. Exactly like the Haskin inside. We talked about it. The 8.5 to 9.5. That was the standard for defenseman Bone. Byron made it 12.5.

[Sean]

It's insane.

[Dan Powers]

So it's always changing and it's so fun to watch because it's crazy.

[Sean]

The. That's actually a really good call with you, with us, with the state tax people. We always talk about, oh, My God, this 11 in Toronto is eight in Texas. Whatever. You pretty much never see that, though. You never see someone going, I'm getting offered 11 in Toronto, I'll take the eight in Dallas. Because I know, literally. And by the way, this isn't. This part isn't a joke. Literally, you are taking home more money.

[Dan Powers]

Yeah.

[Sean]

So I almost think players should do that more because they're like, I'm getting more money and it helps the team. But we don't really see swings like that. Big Rantin was. Was comparable or even. And he was like, whatever. And all the pundits were like, yeah, he got less or sorry, he's getting more because Dallas. But yeah, we don't see. People want market value and then they just get to go. Added bonus. My state's no state tax. Instead of going, I should take less than market.

[Dan Powers]

You know, what we're going to see, that's going to be very interesting to see. So if you go. It's so crazy. I'm just. I went to Florida just to look at this team. It's so insane how young they are. Still, Barkov is the highest paid player on the team making 10 mil a year. He after that, we have Matthew Kachuk at 9.5. Barkov is 30, by the way, Matthew is 28. You then have Reinert making 8.6. Who is.

[Sean]

What a contract. That is unbelievable.

[Dan Powers]

Who is 30. You then have Brady Tkachuk, who is 26, making 8.2. Then you have Sam Bennett, 30 making 8, Carter Hagee 30 making 7, Marshy 38, 38 making 5.25. Lundell 24 making 5. A 227 going to be making 5 next year. The fact that they have Lundell and a 2 both making 5 is unbelievable. Then on D, Seth Jones makes 7, Ekblad makes 6.1. Forsling makes 5.7, Mikola makes 5. Gudas just signed that long ass term at 1.5.

[Sean]

Yeah.

[Dan Powers]

Kulikov makes 1.18. I am so curious after this year because Brady Tkachuk is going to sign an extension instantly. Like this season's going to end and the summer is going to come and we're going to see a Brady Tkachuk extension. If and when Brady signs for. Let's call it 9.5. Let's say he matches Matthew and just goes. Yep, give me a little bit of a race. And frankly if and when it's 10 or under because if they establish the no one makes more than Barkov.

[Sean]

Yeah.

[Dan Powers]

Then that will. Everyone will officially have to bend the knee to Florida to. To. In the terms of that they are a culture thing. This is not a no state tax thing. This is a culture thing. Because if Brady Tkachuk gets he's the next one. I mean, God, they are signed forever, dude. All these guys. If he is the next one up and if he signs for less than Barkov at or less than 10, it is officially. Everyone needs to accept that the Florida Panthers are different.

[Sean]

They are different. And if you want a bag, you can't go there.

[Chris]

Yeah.

[Sean]

Because they don't want you.

[Dan Powers]

Because they want cups there. They don't want bags.

[Sean]

I literally, I was thinking, I was talking the other day to someone maybe at fanatics Fest about the, you know, who's going to. Who's a threat in the East. Can Carolina repeat stuff like that? And I was like in Florida, we'll be back. And I as I said it, I was like, because of the injuries that they suffered last year. And then literally, not out loud, but literally I went, didn't they get someone? Who did they bring in? You literally forgot about Brady. They're someone new. And I was like, I pulled my phone and I was like, oh yeah, they also got Brady.

[Dan Powers]

They are literally so crazy about to roll out next year with a line of Barkov between Brady Tkachuk and Sam Reinert, Sam Bennett between Verhaege, Matthew Tkachuk, Lundell between Looster Ainen and Marsh Hand. And then on D they have forsling Ekblad Mikola, Seth Jones, Kulakov and Gudis Markstrom in that.

[Sean]

Big question. Big question.

[Dan Powers]

I don't know if that's a big again to me. No disrespect, New Jersey, I could play

[Sean]

goalie for The Florida Panthers. Bob was big, though, dude. Oh, he was huge.

[Dan Powers]

Huge moments. But again, Markstrom is a good goalie. I don't care about last year. He's going to stand in front of that team and he's gonna go like this. This is way easier.

[Sean]

That is going to be the story of the season for me, though. That Bob. Hubris by both sides. What did you guys do? All right, dude, I want to go to Utah.

[Dan Powers]

Yeah, let's go to Utah.

[Sean]

Hey, Dan, look at me. Look at this.

[Dan Powers]

Tusks up.

[Sean]

Boom. Tusks up. Troy, do it, Troy.

[Dan Powers]

Troy.

[Sean]

Troy. Do it, Sean. Yeah, there it is. Sean. Good job. Good job.

[Dan Powers]

Thank you, Sean.

[Sean]

The tusks are all the way up. And here's my biggest question, Dan. John Marino signs an 8 year deal at 6.75 AAV. I thought 8 year deals didn't exist anymore.

[Dan Powers]

I don't get it. I feel like such a clown that we have an NHL show. I don't get why the eight year deal. I was told, I was explicitly told that eight year deals are done.

[Sean]

And they were. I was even told like, oh, if it happened before July 1, it's before the new league year, so it's technically still last year. So they can do it.

[Dan Powers]

Yeah.

[Sean]

And I'm like, okay, well, it's July fucking 22nd. Eight years up your hoop. Fuck you.

[Dan Powers]

Yeah.

[Sean]

I don't get it. Why don't people just start signing for 10 if nothing matters?

[Dan Powers]

I don't. I don't get it. I'll never get it. So I don't even want to talk about it. What I do want to talk about is this, which goes right into our next topic.

[Sean]

Two teams.

[Dan Powers]

We're going to be talking about this. We love right now, a discussion about young teams that are being structured very, very well. Florida is. I mean, that is the pinnacle. Right? But we've been stroking off Montreal.

[Sean]

Heavy.

[Dan Powers]

Yeah, Montreal's building something real nice. For a time. We were stroking off Anaheim and then Leo Carlson said, ish.

[Sean]

No.

[Dan Powers]

Think so. Pay me all your money.

[Sean]

How do you say. How do you say no in Swedish?

[Dan Powers]

Nay, nay.

[Sean]

How do you say. Do you say. Do you know how to say. I don't think so? That's a weird expression that maybe doesn't come up on Duolingo.

[Dan Powers]

No, I do.

[Sean]

How do you say it?

[Dan Powers]

Let me think about it. I don't think so. Fuck. I do know this.

[Sean]

I don't know. I don't know that.

[Dan Powers]

I do know this. Hold on, let me think about it. I'm Mad that you put me on the spot.

[Sean]

I guess I was trying to. I gave you an out. I said, I'm sure you couldn't know this. This would never come up.

[Dan Powers]

No, it does. It does.

[Sean]

I don't think so. I don't.

[Dan Powers]

I'm gonna do my best. Yeah, I. I think it's yogtror inta day.

[Sean]

That's what Leo Carlson said. Like this. We would like to build our roster and have. And succeed. Nope. Crawl in today.

[Chris]

And they went. You.

[Sean]

They went.

[Dan Powers]

I believe that's.

[Sean]

What does that mean? But Dan, you know. Hold on. What team?

[Dan Powers]

Yeah, I got it.

[Sean]

Oh, that was it. What team is building something good?

[Dan Powers]

I think Utah might be.

[Sean]

They might be.

[Dan Powers]

So Marino. I think Marino's a great player. I loved what they said. He's 29 right now. Going to be 30 when this kicks in at a 6.7. I thought he was great last year. I think he had career highs last year. He's a good puck moving defenseman there. Bill Armstrong was talking about how they were like, yeah, he's turning 30, but he hasn't played that much hockey. His body's in great shape. He was huge for us last year. And all of a sudden I look at them and you've got Sergachev Weeks and Marino all signed long term. You've got Schmidt who had a great year, won a cup in Florida, obviously, and is signed with this team. He was pretty good last year. You bring in peak and you're kind of like, you got Dimitri Simyshev that you've drafted, that's in the mixer here. Pretty good D. And we obviously saw how great their offense was last year. And dude, they brought in Vinnie Trocheck via trade and they brought in Anders Lee, like great veteran leadership in there, who's going to be good top six player. They kept hating and I'm kind of like fucking, all right, dude, I will tell you what.

[Sean]

That trip we had to go out there, I'm not gonna sue her any rinks, but there are a few duds, but for the most part, it's the NHL, it's the National.

[Dan Powers]

The rinks are cool.

[Sean]

You know, we're not playing in Mullet anymore.

[Dan Powers]

No disrespect to Mullet. You're just a college arena.

[Sean]

But this, that city and that rink and the vibe there is so sick. And you can chirp, you can chirp the Mormons all you want. It's definitely a thing. It's not not, it's not, not presence there. Absolutely. But dude, we were Joking there. I mean, that airport is incredible. I will happily move. I'll take this right on down to Salt Lake City if you need me to.

[Dan Powers]

Yeah.

[Sean]

And I'll just post up there for the rest of my life and be pretty damn happy.

[Dan Powers]

Yeah.

[Sean]

So I have always felt like we can. We can talk about team culture and no state tax and whatever. Is it a cool place to live? These people have to live there and have their wives sitting there half the fucking year while you're on the road. Have your kids there. What is there to do? And I'm telling you, Salt Lake City is gas. And they're built. It's getting bigger and better and building. Cool shit. The rink is awesome. We got a tour of the facilities. If you haven't seen that, go to our YouTube. Check it out. They have a full team steam room. A team steam. 20 person steam. I would. I wouldn't hesitate for a millisecond if I was a good player and Utah was offering me a fair number because of that place, getting to go live there and, and that roster.

[Dan Powers]

Logan Cooley, $10 million. Nick Schmaltz, $8 million. Clayton Keller, 7.15 for two more years. Dylan Gunther, 7.142 until 2033. Vinnie Trocheck at 5.6. Anders Lee at 5.4. Hayton at 4.7. Krauser at 4.3. Jack McBain at 4.25. They are very well structured.

[Sean]

How long has he been on. How long has Trocheck been on that contract?

[Dan Powers]

Two years, three years. Three, I think.

[Sean]

Well, it says he's on a seven year deal that runs through 28, 29. So he probably signed it like 22. Oh, yeah.

[Dan Powers]

So four.

[Sean]

Four, maybe.

[Dan Powers]

Yeah, maybe four.

[Sean]

That's a great contract.

[Dan Powers]

It's a great contract.

[Sean]

That's a great player.

[Dan Powers]

Yep. I just think Utah and yes, man, so many people have their opinions about Utah. I absolutely love Utah.

[Sean]

There are.

[Dan Powers]

There are quirks, we'll call them Mormon quirks about Utah that are undeniable. But the reality is there are plenty of amazing restaurants and bars that you can go and drink at. You can buy booze. It is what it is on Sunday. Not on Sunday.

[Sean]

Not on Sunday, I gotta say.

[Dan Powers]

But you just prepare. That's what everyone said they were like, you just prepare.

[Sean]

You know it.

[Dan Powers]

The skiing is unbelievable. The mountain town culture is unbelievable. It is so beautiful in the summer.

[Sean]

What did we have with Scotty? An Alta bomb.

[Dan Powers]

An Alta bomb. It was really. It was. I believe it was a paps.

[Sean]

Oh, yeah, dude. It was a.

[Dan Powers]

With a Jaeger shot.

[Sean]

No, no, no, no. Wasn't it thought it was Jaeger. No, I think it was an espresso.

[Dan Powers]

Oh, it was espresso.

[Sean]

I think it was a hot espresso. Hot espresso.

[Dan Powers]

Just in a beer. It was just espresso and beer.

[Sean]

Yeah.

[Dan Powers]

That is like the. The double whammy of Mormon. No, no. Right?

[Sean]

Yeah. Yeah. Well, good point. I didn't think

[Dan Powers]

you are not. There's like some of them can't drink and can't drink caffeine or coffee or whatever. We just.

[Sean]

Is really funny.

[Dan Powers]

Yeah. Is that what it was?

[Sean]

I'm pretty sure we put a whole hot espresso, dropped it into a pbr.

[Dan Powers]

Yeah. That was crazy.

[Sean]

And the temperature, you know. You know when you're swimming in like a lake and this just. You get some like super hot water.

[Chris]

You.

[Sean]

What the. That's what that drink was.

[Dan Powers]

Whoa, whoa, whoa.

[Sean]

It's cold.

[Dan Powers]

But Utah's amazing and yes, the facility and Delta are phenomenal. So I'm telling you, Utah is, is certainly going to be one of these. Everyone start looking at Utah. They're incredibly well structured and they have a very, very attractive program.

[Sean]

Yes, they do. They. And they were scary in the playoffs, I gotta say. They. They eventually fell to the Vegas Golden Knights who went to the Stanley Cup. But there was a stretch there where it was like, yo, the tusks up are going to clap Vegas and we're done here. Very tough division.

[Dan Powers]

I will say, very tough division.

[Sean]

Very tough.

[Dan Powers]

Moving on to our next topic. I am very interested in a certain team because we didn't talk about big news that happened here in Trevor Zegras. So we're talking about the Philadelphia Flyers. The Trevor Zegras extension kind of happened over the weekend. So we didn't get to talk about it on the show. But z signed for four years. 9.125 aav. We're getting z on the show.

[Sean]

Z, come on.

[Dan Powers]

See you soon. Jamie Drysdale also signs. 4 years, 6.5 AAV. What a great fucking deal. So we're talking about all of these young teams that are up and coming. Philly made playoffs last year and surprised a lot of people. Philly beat Pitt in the first round and surprised a lot of people.

[Sean]

Thank God Evan's not here.

[Dan Powers]

Thank God Dr. Watkins isn't here. And we're talking about all these young teams and how they're well structured. Obviously we had the craziness of the Leo offer sheet and I'm going to be honest, we love Leo. But I now look at this team which before I even get into this I'm going to say currently has 13.9 mil in cap still. Thank God the Ducks matched.

[Sean]

Oh yeah, yeah.

[Dan Powers]

Because I look at Philly and they've got zegras now at 9.125 being the highest paid forward after that TK. Travis Koneckney at 8.75, Sean Couturier at 7.75, Owen Tippett at 6.2. Great contract. Christian Dvorak at 5.15, Noah Cates at 4, Tyson Forrester at 3.75. This year kicks into 7.1 the year after that. They've got great depth. They've got unbelievable rookies in Porter Martone, Alex Bump. These aren't, you know, rookie deals. Matvey Mitchkov, they've got Jamie Drysdale, Travis Sanheim, Cam York, Rasmus Ristalainen on D In the top four, highest paid one is Jamie at 6.5, which is insane. And they've got a tandem of Joe Wall and Dan Vladar. Vladar just his extension at 5.5 next year. Vladar is only 28. Vladar played great and beat the Penguins in round like that is your guy.

[Sean]

He also played great against Carolina. Great against Carolina legitimately. He was awesome.

[Dan Powers]

This team has again damn near 14 mil in cap space. So many people were bringing up Philly when a lot of these. They were bringing up Philly with Jason Robertson. They're bringing up Philly with Dylan Larkin. People being like Larkin should add Philly to his list. And it is so funny how in the dark of night the Flyers, I am here to say, are fucking back.

[Chris]

Dude.

[Dan Powers]

Like if you look at their top six, top nine, yes. Being a combination of Martone, Dvorak, Koneckney, Forster, Zegras, Tippett, Bump, Cates, Mitchkov, that and you, that's. You got Couturier who can play anywhere.

[Sean]

Yes.

[Dan Powers]

You got friend of the program Noel Chari came by the office. Fucking the man, dude. He is such a Swiss army knife on that bottom six. And their D is all of a sudden pretty fucking good. And you've got a young guy like David Jurecheck who's on a rookie contract. Like they have drafted well, they've got good. And. And I'm just like fucking when did this happen? When was Philly back? And I'll tell you when. Now.

[Sean]

Right now, man. This team is legitimate. I always get worried, always get worried when a team has their first jump, first big jump into the playoffs and then I Go. Don't. Don't regress. Happened with Jersey, happened with the Kraken, happened with our spunk. It happens. Okay? And I worried a little bit about Philly. What a turn. What a surprising season. Holy. That last surge into the playoffs because, dude, they were dead in the water last year. And then huge surge into the playoffs, beat Pittsburgh. Unbelievable. Season vibes are so high, dude. It is actually, now that I'm saying it out loud, it is so similar to that Jersey season. I guess not the surge into playoffs, but Jersey beating the Rangers in the first round. Such an emotional rivalry win. And then all the vibes going into the next season, like, oh, we're going to the Cup. And then like, you stink and you just blast. You're like, what the Philly. I feared that regression. I still fear it season even started yet. But this. They are lucky that their division isn't that strong, I don't think. And this team has no. There's no regression. They have no excuse if they regress because this team is full of young guys who already performed and can do it at this level. And they have great cap management as currently constructed. They could add another piece. I am one of the biggest Joe Wall guys outside of his fucking family, I assume because I think this. I texted JP when this happened. Yeah, I was like getting Joe Wall, who was supposed to be the future stud star.

[Dan Powers]

He was one Sam Bennett Conkey away from being the guy dude.

[Sean]

And. And has also lost him in. And they lost because of that. But not true.

[Dan Powers]

Not true.

[Sean]

Also, he was it that year they won the Jennings where it was him and Stoli that were had an insane goals against Joe Wall, at worst is an incredible tandem. Incredible tandem. And at best is like, oh, shit, we stumbled upon our starting goalie.

[Dan Powers]

Yeah, he's the perfect tandem in that if anything happens to Vladar, if Vladar gets cold or God forbid, he gets injured and you go to Wall, you're like, we're fine.

[Sean]

Amazing.

[Dan Powers]

That is the great. I love tandems like that, where it's like, you can have a good backup. Like, I shout out Eunice Korp Salo. I think he's a good backup. But if anything were to happen to the starter, you're like, don't know that we can go that fast far here. Whereas Wall, if you go into a playoff series with Wall, I'm like, yeah, you could be. You could touch the sun, dude.

[Sean]

And I'm not talking about Ladar at all. I think he's awesome. I think he proved it in playoffs. I think he earned every penny of that contract, and I think he has a huge, huge future. So I'm so down with that. And, dude, for me, Mitchkoff is the greatest. Mitch Coff is like where I'm driving through a question mark box in Super Mario in Mario Kart.

[Dan Powers]

Yeah.

[Sean]

Because I'm like, he could be a fucking triple red shell. And. Because. And he looked like it two seasons ago. And talk. I know it's. He can be tough on guys, and it's like, it changes the way some guys play. He's a guy that you just got to let off the leash, in my opinion. I. I know the teams have certain systems, but sometimes you got to let a guy play outside the system. Because two years ago, he looked like every bit of that. Wow. I cannot believe we got this guy at 6 just because of the KHL thing.

[Dan Powers]

Yes, correct. If he gets eight, right? Or was it six?

[Sean]

I can't remember. I thought it was six. But you can check that if. Dude, if they let him loose or he even becomes legitimately the one overall that he looked like seven. Wow, that's funny. You just triple red shelled yourself. And now. And now, Dan, move him right up to. To the first line. You know what I mean? Like, if you have a missile stud

[Dan Powers]

there, whatever is going on with him in terms of like, are you out of shape? Are you this, that, whatever? But obviously something has been going on, but if he just all of a sudden snaps his fingers and is like this, I am. I am an absolute weapon.

[Sean]

Yep.

[Dan Powers]

This team's a joke, dude.

[Sean]

Insane.

[Dan Powers]

And again, it's. Even if you want to. People fear the. The. You know, it's a. It's a. We just saw it with Krill. People fear the. It's a Russian player. Are they coming here and just going to be like, fucking pay me every cent you have? Because he is on RFA next year. But there's a. There's a world with his slower start that might almost be good for you. Because if you're like, hey, Mitchkoff, here's. Here's four years, five years at great. Seven, you know, seven and a half, whatever. And they don't really have a leg to stand on to demand more. Then all of a sudden you're fucking

[Sean]

laughing and dude, that he. Yeah, because sometimes the Russians want their money, but. But if you have him right now, before he can really demand it, then you do it. Actually, this is incredible. When is he. What's his. When is he RFA now.

[Dan Powers]

He's RFA next year.

[Sean]

Yeah. Okay, so like they do right now. I would literally call him right now and go, hey, dude, I will give you a massive extension. Do you have to wait or can you do it right now?

[Dan Powers]

You can. You can.

[Chris]

I believe.

[Dan Powers]

God, we're such a joke.

[Sean]

I don't know. Do you think I'm supposed to know about restricted free agency rules? You know how much fucking bullshit is bouncing around in this brain? You think I have space for that? Because if you can, I would fucking scoop him up right now before he goes for a fucking 88 burger this season and then get him for nothing. And then go. And then next year.

[Dan Powers]

Oh, they can do it now. Yeah, it's July 1st, dude. They can do it right now.

[Sean]

Bang him seven years right now for fucking. It's six. And he goes, okay. And then, dude, next year when he. In two years, when he's pumping in 120 point seasons, he goes like this. I would like.

[Dan Powers]

But you know what's funny, dude, he had 51 points last year.

[Sean]

I know.

[Dan Powers]

He played 81 games.

[Sean]

Sucks.

[Dan Powers]

He had played 81 games. He had 20 tucks and he had 51 points. And people were like this. He's bomb.

[Sean]

And it was a regression, though. That's even crazy.

[Dan Powers]

Yeah, but it's like you're. Yeah, he had 63 the year before and 26 goals. But I mean, he's a. He's a. Yet again, he's a Russian tank. 80 games in his first year, 81 in the next year. I'm like, I would offer him now so fast.

[Sean]

Same Dan.

[Dan Powers]

And I'm sure his camp, whoever his agent is, is like, no, yeah, we are waiting and seeing what happened. But for love, for the love of God, like, tease it, man. Be like. And again, I would do four.

[Sean]

I would just say, at least do that.

[Dan Powers]

You know, I'd be like, you're. You're 22 years. 21. 22 years old. Here's a four year deal. You'll still be on RFA. Like, fuck me. I mean, definitely get him signed.

[Sean]

At least do that. Because his agent would go, dude, it's all right. That means when you're 25, we can sign a hammer.

[Dan Powers]

I mean, Philly is so back.

[Sean]

Lock him up.

[Dan Powers]

I feel so confident in this team. And again, the 13.9 that you have, and really the only big thing you've got coming around the bend immediately is Mitchkov is electric. Thanks God. Anaheim matched.

[Sean]

Yeah. Yeah.

[Dan Powers]

Thank God you were in such a good spot.

[Sean]

I wonder if Larks would go there.

[Dan Powers]

I mean, he would be amazing. But again, it's a trait. Like you would lose a lot of these guys.

[Sean]

Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Dan Powers]

That's what you got to think.

[Sean]

Yeah. Never mind, never mind, never mind.

[Dan Powers]

Maybe they signed Robertson for free next summer.

[Sean]

Okay, I like that dude. Yay. 13.9.

[Dan Powers]

Believable.

[Sean]

I go, Jason, here's 13.9. Yeah, sounds good.

[Dan Powers]

All right, we're taking an ad break. Then we're going to get into some very, very fun stuff.

[Sean]

All right, everybody, I got some big, big breaking news. BetMGM. Our favorite partners, they are turning up some excitement like you have never seen before in your life. We got more ways to win. I love winning. Every time I gamble, I say I really hope I win. I know that's unique to me, but that's just the way I do it. And I get really pumped when I do it. And I want you to win. So here's some more ways. Because you can score in any sport parlay boost token, every Thursday this summer. Every single Thursday. And that's how you elevate your bet. It is so simple. You add a parlay wager. So go in there, start cooking up something. Baseball, NFL's come in, we got all kinds of action. Any parlay you want, you cook that up and you add it to your bet slip. Then you just activate the boost token. And then if your wager hits with that any sport parlay boost token, you get extra winnings and they're all in unrestricted bonus dollars, which is amazing because then you can take that from your account. You can bet on whatever you want. After that, just money lines, anything. Doesn't have to be parlays. Once you hit that activated boost token, boom. Then you're rolling in bonus bets. Put it on whatever you want, find even more ways to win, just like I do. You know it's me thing. I know. I hope it's a you thing too. I love to win. I hope you do too. And if you haven't signed up for BetMGM yet, use that promo code, netters. That's n e T T E R S. When you sign up and you get up to a fifteen hundred dollar new player offer on your first wager. Are you kidding me? BetMGM make it legendary.

[Chris]

All right.

[Dan Powers]

I've been big on my foodie kick lately.

[Sean]

Yeah.

[Dan Powers]

Just cooking, enjoying, doing it all. And I saw one of these like grids the other day of people were looking at grids of various. You see it all the time with toast. It's like, what's the best toast levels of Toast. And I was like, oh, that's interesting, because it's a. We're all talking about toast, and people are talking about what is their favorite type of toast. But then I saw one that was ice cream, and it was like, all the ice cream flavors that you see when you go to an ice cream shop, not even just looking in, like, the literal board, and it's like, what jumps out at you. And I found this amazing sandwich grid, and we've got it up on the screen. We'll put it up on the. On the pod while we're discussing this. But I. I'm a. I love a sandwich. I imagine you both do, too.

[Chris]

Yeah. Yes.

[Sean]

Oh, yeah, Big time.

[Dan Powers]

I started looking at this, and I wanted to have, like, let's get into a discussion. And I want you all to. I want you to stare at this photo of all these sandwiches to our audio listeners. We are. We are listening. We are looking at a grid of, like, 40 sandwiches.

[Chris]

We're gonna describe each one in detail, so we will.

[Dan Powers]

And they all look like porn. They are. All these. All these sandwiches are porn. And I want to know because there's a difference between, like, what is your favorite sandwich? And then also, what are you looking at here that's jumping out at you and tickling the plums?

[Sean]

Okay, I see. I see. I see.

[Dan Powers]

Sean, I want you to go first. Like, look at this grid. And what.

[Sean]

And this is just looks.

[Dan Powers]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Chris]

There's, like, four sandwiches on here that I wouldn't want.

[Dan Powers]

Wouldn't want.

[Sean]

I think I want to go through that, too.

[Dan Powers]

Yeah, we'll discuss that.

[Chris]

Yeah. I think my number one from the top line is probably the pulled pork.

[Dan Powers]

Wow.

[Chris]

Okay.

[Dan Powers]

I've got nothing bad to say about that.

[Sean]

That one does look awesome. Yeah.

[Dan Powers]

I mean, the pulled pork in here looks awesome. Incredible.

[Sean]

Are you going?

[Dan Powers]

Well, no, I want you to go, but I know that you take a long time.

[Sean]

I'm going to go

[Dan Powers]

again. There's just stuff here that's like. There's some that maybe wouldn't even be in my. Go immediate.

[Sean]

I know, but they just look so.

[Dan Powers]

But I'm like, God damn it.

[Sean]

That looks incredible.

[Chris]

Yeah. Who's the photographer for this? This is like. These are.

[Dan Powers]

He's a pizza. He's a porn drunk. He knows what to do.

[Sean]

That is so true.

[Dan Powers]

Dan, I'm gonna be honest. Can you go?

[Sean]

No.

[Dan Powers]

You're pathetic. This is not my favorite sandwich. But I'm telling you, on this grid, the Thanksgiving looks insane.

[Chris]

It looks so good.

[Sean]

That is a great answer.

[Chris]

If you go to, you know, Wawa in. On the east coast of New Jersey.

[Dan Powers]

Yeah.

[Chris]

Like a gas station called Wawa, they're known for.

[Sean]

Sorry, I didn't realize what you said. Wawa.

[Dan Powers]

And they've got Thanksgiving all year round.

[Chris]

They do a thing called the gobbler.

[Sean]

Yeah.

[Chris]

Which is like a Thanksgiving sandwich. That looks kind of gross. It's not. Doesn't look as good as this one. But it's. It tastes so good.

[Dan Powers]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Chris]

That's what you gotta get.

[Dan Powers]

Genuinely, Sean, I think my favorite thing about American Thanksgiving, no joke, is making a gobbler sandwich after the meal. And here's a tip for you folks at home. Make your gobbler sandwich. And the tradition is the turkey, the stuffing, the cranberry sauce. Some people put some gravy on there.

[Sean]

Really?

[Dan Powers]

Oh, yeah.

[Sean]

That's sloppy.

[Dan Powers]

Get slices of white American cheese and put it on your gobbler sandwich. You will thank me later. And if you want to be a true king. Plain kettle cooked potato chips.

[Sean]

Oh, yeah, yeah.

[Dan Powers]

In the sandwich.

[Chris]

Oh, that's a. That's an interesting one.

[Dan Powers]

Oh, yeah.

[Chris]

Why do we have to wait for Thanksgiving?

[Dan Powers]

We don't.

[Sean]

We don't do it today.

[Dan Powers]

That's the thing.

[Sean]

Go get one today.

[Dan Powers]

I think we've told the story on the pod.

[Sean]

I was just to do this one time.

[Dan Powers]

Our boy from back home from Maine flew out.

[Sean]

Sean, the kid who did the sneeze thing.

[Dan Powers]

Yes.

[Chris]

Oh, no, wait. Sneeze man.

[Dan Powers]

Yeah, sneeze man.

[Chris]

Okay, great.

[Dan Powers]

Sneeze grid man.

[Chris]

This is already going to be a great story.

[Dan Powers]

She flew to LA to have Thanksgiving with us. And he got in on Wednesday and he like got off the flight at like 7pm and he came over to the house and we were like, oh, yeah, like, this is great. We fired up like Super Mario on N64. We were going to play that all night. We were having some beers and we were like, let's order dinner. And we ordered from this sandwich shop around the corner. And he legitimately. We were put. I was like, what do you want? He was like, I'll do the gun. Gobbler is the tapestry.

[Sean]

I was like, what?

[Dan Powers]

We're about to eat all that tomorrow and then have gobbler sandwiches for the next two days.

[Chris]

It's like, you only get it one, one day.

[Dan Powers]

Yeah. But I was just like, what, dude? The day before Thanksgiving.

[Sean]

This is insane. That was batshit insane, dude.

[Chris]

It was crazy.

[Sean]

Batshit insane.

[Dan Powers]

All right, so the Thanksgiving is the one that, like, that is the one that is Getting me sexually aroused more than anything.

[Sean]

This is a sandwich I really do like, and I think it looks great here, too. I'm going with the Reuben.

[Dan Powers]

Yeah, dude, anytime. Have you ever. You. I was about to ask Sean if he's ever had a Reuben.

[Chris]

You know what I was just thinking? Reuben's on the. The bottom 5% for me.

[Sean]

Sean was giving me.

[Dan Powers]

Is it corn that you don't like?

[Chris]

No.

[Dan Powers]

Is it the right bread?

[Chris]

This photo isn't as photogenic as the rest.

[Dan Powers]

Interesting.

[Chris]

It's not that it's a bad photo. It's just compared to the rest of them. I think it's in the bottom.

[Dan Powers]

Definitely the bottom. I was going to say a. I love a Reuben.

[Sean]

Yeah.

[Dan Powers]

And the way to get me to order a Reuben is when there's a photo of it.

[Sean]

Yeah, yeah.

[Dan Powers]

When I go to a diner or something and they've got photos on the menu also. We all love a fancy restaurant. Photos on the menu rock.

[Sean]

Yeah.

[Dan Powers]

Yeah. You're rarely going to see a photo on the menu at a fancy restaurant. I love when photos are.

[Sean]

Can we. Can we go through. We won't take this long. Can we go through literally all of these and say if we like that sandwich and if the picture is good?

[Dan Powers]

Yeah, we can do that. But you are.

[Chris]

Fuck it. It's. It's a sandwich podcast.

[Dan Powers]

It's a sandwich pod.

[Sean]

Why not?

[Dan Powers]

So your pick is the Reuben.

[Sean]

I think that one looks awesome to me.

[Chris]

Yeah. Yeah.

[Dan Powers]

Okay. All right. Number one is a bacon, egg, and cheese on a bagel.

[Sean]

I love the sandwich, and I think that picture is tremendous.

[Dan Powers]

The picture's tremendous.

[Chris]

Yeah. I probably. It wouldn't be my first choice because I'm not a big egg guy, but the photo.

[Sean]

Are you a picky eater?

[Chris]

No, not really. Okay. Not really. I used to be.

[Dan Powers]

Let me ask you a question. Are you not a big egg guy because the eggs taste too much like eggs?

[Chris]

I think I'm not a big egg guy because they just like. I don't know. It's. It's a texture thing in some cases.

[Dan Powers]

Okay. So any version of Egg Friday, I guess.

[Chris]

You know what? Actually it is because the eggs taste too much like eggs. Yeah. And eggs.

[Dan Powers]

That's a thing.

[Sean]

I know, I know.

[Dan Powers]

I love eggs. And every now and then I'm eating eggs and I'm like, these taste like eggs.

[Chris]

That's like when someone has a really bad fart, you call it eggy because it smells like eggs. And yet people want to put that in their mouth.

[Sean]

I do it all the time.

[Dan Powers]

Well, Sean, people eat ass.

[Chris]

The portion of like, if you go to like a breakfast place here in the States and you get like scrambled eggs.

[Dan Powers]

Yeah.

[Chris]

They'll give you like so much scrambled eggs. And there's only. There's a definitely a finite limit once you cross that threshold where the eggs are no longer enjoyable.

[Sean]

Yeah.

[Dan Powers]

Oh yeah. That's what I'm saying.

[Chris]

All the way up until a point. And you're just like, this is way too much egg.

[Dan Powers]

That tastes like too much like eggs. Next one is a grilled chicken cheese. It's a very simple looking grilled cheese. I'm honestly, I'm not into this grilled cheese. And I love a grilled cheese, but I make like gourmet grilled cheeses and they fucking will knock your cocks clean off your body. You'll be a Ken doll after you've had my grilled cheese. This grilled cheese does not look that good.

[Sean]

This grilled cheese. I don't. I'm not as high on grilled cheeses anyway. And this picture sucks.

[Chris]

This is might be the worst picture on the whole list.

[Dan Powers]

I think it's pretty bad at least.

[Sean]

You fucking bitch.

[Dan Powers]

It's just a plain ass like Kraft American single grilled cheese that is like. This is a grilled chees that you get at a, you know, Shack burger shop. That's like. We also do a grilled cheese.

[Chris]

Is this an AI grilled cheese? Cuz the way the cheese is dripping down on the side looks a little bit too kind of.

[Sean]

It's ridiculous.

[Dan Powers]

Sean.

[Chris]

I hate snotty.

[Dan Powers]

I hate to admit that there's a chance that every one of these is.

[Sean]

Don't say that to me.

[Dan Powers]

They might be. Next up we've got the pulled pork. And it looks incredible.

[Sean]

Perfect. That was Sean's pick. He's 100% right. We have no notes.

[Dan Powers]

Next up, we've got the Bon Me.

[Chris]

Looks so good.

[Dan Powers]

It looks so good. I'm gonna be honest. I've never been a Banh Mi guy.

[Sean]

I am not the biggest Banh Mi guy. I like them, but yeah, I need the Banh Mi.

[Dan Powers]

Next up is a blt.

[Sean]

The worst sandwich on earth.

[Dan Powers]

It is. Used to be my go.

[Chris]

Really?

[Sean]

Yeah.

[Dan Powers]

Used to be my go to sandwich.

[Chris]

Worst savage on earth.

[Sean]

They forgot to put. It's like.

[Dan Powers]

Timeout, timeout, timeout, timeout. First of all, you're wrong.

[Sean]

It's like.

[Dan Powers]

First of all, first of all. Hey, shithead. First of all, you're wrong. Because I know for a fact that there's a couple of Sandwiches on here that you are going to say are worse than that.

[Sean]

Actually, you're right.

[Dan Powers]

So take it easy. But I learned one day, Sean. I learned BLT used to be my go. That actually used to be my sick sandwich. When I was homesick from school, I would always want a blt.

[Chris]

Nice.

[Dan Powers]

Interesting. When I learned that you could put more meat on a blt, like a turkey blt, I was like, oh, why would I ever have a BLT again?

[Chris]

There's. What's it called? Chopes Chupes.

[Sean]

Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Chris]

They do a really good turkey blt.

[Dan Powers]

There you go.

[Sean]

And I love, by the way, to be clear, I love a blank blt. Yeah. Like any. You want to add something now, it's the best sandwich on earth. Yeah.

[Chris]

That's so funny.

[Sean]

It just.

[Chris]

You feel like it's missing something.

[Sean]

They forgot the thing. It'd be like literally getting a cheeseburger with lettuce, tomato, and bacon. And then they didn't put the cheeseburger in it.

[Dan Powers]

Yeah.

[Sean]

And then I just got the bottle.

[Dan Powers]

Hey, we got a lot of sandwiches

[Chris]

to go through here. All right. All right, speed round.

[Dan Powers]

Next up we've got Italian sub. Love it.

[Sean]

Love an Italian. Don't love this picture as much, but I don't know why it looks like

[Chris]

I'd have to unhinge my jaw.

[Sean]

Yeah, yeah.

[Dan Powers]

It's a little too fat.

[Chris]

It's a little bit too thick.

[Dan Powers]

Next up's the Thanksgiving. Looks amazing.

[Chris]

Amazing.

[Dan Powers]

Lobster roll looks amazing.

[Sean]

I'm actually really happy about this. I love a lobster roll. Have you had a lobster roll?

[Chris]

Yes, I've had lobster rolls. The weird thing about lobsters is that I think they look disgusting when they're alive.

[Dan Powers]

They do. They look like cockroaches. Yeah.

[Chris]

People don't want to eat insects unless they're, like, gigantic and from the ocean. Yeah.

[Dan Powers]

But it's an interesting dilemma.

[Chris]

But when they're. When it's food, it always looks delicious.

[Dan Powers]

No, it's unbelievable. We eat, like, shrimp and crawfish. It's f. Next up is a turkey club. Dumbest sandwich in the world for me.

[Sean]

I hate a club. Looks like this one is missing the lame third bun, which I appreciate.

[Chris]

It looks incomplete. And it kind of looks like the top loaf of bread or top slice of bread is like.

[Dan Powers]

I'm telling you, these all might be

[Sean]

AI Sandra and AJ Audino. Love a club. Devastates me every time.

[Dan Powers]

The third bun is the most unnecessary thing on earth. But here's the thing. I love a club sand. Especially at a diner. I ordered one in the Hampton.

[Sean]

Yeah, the.

[Dan Powers]

You just take the bun off. The third bun is so dumb.

[Sean]

Get it out of there.

[Dan Powers]

Next up is a tuna melt. One of my favorite sandwiches ever. And this picture looks like sex.

[Sean]

I couldn't believe you didn't say this.

[Dan Powers]

Yeah, I mean, it is.

[Sean]

I almost said this. And I don't even like a tuna.

[Dan Powers]

This tuna melt looks like it.

[Sean]

So hard. Couldn't believe you didn't say it.

[Dan Powers]

Next up is fried chicken sandwich. Looks fantastic. Good pickles sticking out of there.

[Chris]

Too many pickles on it.

[Sean]

Ooh, Too many pickles either, actually.

[Dan Powers]

Who are you?

[Sean]

I like.

[Chris]

I like pickles. That's too many pickles.

[Sean]

I think he's right for this picture. I love pickles, and I would probably put this many on mine. But for the picture there. This pickles coming out its ass.

[Dan Powers]

Presumably there's at least eight pickles in the sandwich.

[Chris]

There's four just in the. Like.

[Dan Powers]

That's what I'm saying.

[Chris]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. I mean, that's. That's assuming there's none in the center.

[Sean]

Yeah, yeah. Correct.

[Dan Powers]

I'm assuming around. I'm assuming that those four reach the halfway mark, and then there's four on the other side.

[Sean]

Oh, no, no.

[Chris]

I. I'm. There's like, four layers.

[Sean]

Yeah, yeah. Agree, agree.

[Dan Powers]

I kind of want pickle in every bite. Next up is the cheesesteak.

[Sean]

I almost said this. Possibly my favorite sandwich. I just. The only reason I didn't say it is I prefer the shredded steak as opposed to this.

[Dan Powers]

Kind of looks shredded, though.

[Sean]

I know. That's why I went like this.

[Dan Powers]

I think that looks shredded. It looks like thin, like, sliced steak.

[Chris]

You ever get the Philly cheesesteak where they put the cheese whiz from a can on?

[Dan Powers]

Yeah, I'm not in there.

[Chris]

I saw that.

[Dan Powers]

I need. I need meltdown. I need melted, actual sliced cheese. Next up is the Cubano. Probably my favorite sandwich of all time.

[Sean]

Agree. Didn't love this picture.

[Dan Powers]

Didn't love the picture, but it still looks amazing. Okay, next up is a meatball sub.

[Chris]

Too heavy, dude.

[Sean]

Meatball subs suck.

[Dan Powers]

You know what?

[Sean]

Horrible sandwich.

[Dan Powers]

Okay, calm down.

[Sean]

One of the worst sandwiches of all time.

[Dan Powers]

Although if that bread is soft, can I say.

[Sean]

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Dan Powers]

Do not you dare toast my fucking meatball sub ever. You're just gonna shoot meatballs out like a pie, Sean. I kind of agree they're too heavy. Often I once ordered a meatball sub, and the place that I ordered it from chopped the meatballs like, in half. So it wasn't like when you get a meatball sub, it's usually like three big fat meatballs. Yeah, four. This was like they were chopped in half, maybe even in quarters. So it was like jammed in there.

[Sean]

That sounds.

[Dan Powers]

And it was a way better experience.

[Chris]

It's like it's been pre chewed for you.

[Sean]

Yeah.

[Chris]

Like a baby.

[Dan Powers]

I was getting baby birded.

[Sean]

Yeah.

[Dan Powers]

I really like. Next up is a croque monsieur.

[Sean]

Never heard of it. Looks good.

[Dan Powers]

I think they're really delicious.

[Sean]

What is it?

[Dan Powers]

A croque monsieur. Let me get it fully for you. But it's like a ham and cheese patty melt type vibe. And they are really, really delicious because they melt cheese on top of the bread too.

[Sean]

Okay, well. Cause see the croque madame onto the next one and it has an egg. And I'm wondering if it's like a female egg. Maybe there's sperm in the croque monsieur. Check that, Christopher. Just check.

[Dan Powers]

Why? Why?

[Chris]

I don't even understand what you're saying right now.

[Dan Powers]

The croque madame is next and there's a fried egg on it.

[Sean]

There's an egg on it. The female one.

[Dan Powers]

That one too messy for me. I would not like a croque madame.

[Sean]

That looks horrible.

[Chris]

Yeah, that's.

[Sean]

I'm not supposed to hold the egg. Do I put my hand on the sunny side out there? No.

[Chris]

It's a long people. They'll love it. You can fast forward if you don't like.

[Dan Powers]

Next up is the Reuben. Looks great.

[Sean]

Phenomenal.

[Dan Powers]

Love a Reuben. I prefer a pastrami meat. And I think from being. Next one up is a gyro. Fucking love, man. Gyros and donors. I. I've got to be eating more.

[Sean]

Sean.

[Dan Powers]

I love a p. Very good. Pitas are so nice.

[Chris]

Exclusively purchased from a truck though.

[Dan Powers]

Yes, absolutely.

[Sean]

Gyro is a. A big Nashville thing. I don't know how that happened, but there's like every truck on Broadway.

[Chris]

Nashville's like the random drawer in your kitchen. It has all the random stuff. That's what Nashville is to me. They have like a replica of the Parthenon in Nashville for no reason.

[Dan Powers]

For no reason.

[Chris]

Yeah, it's. I don't understand it. So you just put all the random things. You don't know where to place them. It goes into the. It goes into Nashville.

[Sean]

Yep. Yeah, I like that.

[Dan Powers]

Next up is a Po boy. Shout out. Shrinking. I hand up. I've never had a po boy.

[Sean]

I have. In New Orleans. I'll pretty much only ever have a po boy in New Orleans. They're pretty good.

[Chris]

Is that shrimp?

[Dan Powers]

Yes, I'm pretty sure it's, like, breaded fried shrimp in with, like, a nice sauce.

[Sean]

They're good, but I'm like, okay.

[Dan Powers]

Next up is a caprese sandwich in the top three most pointless sandwiches on earth.

[Sean]

Got to be. Got to be one of the worst sandwiches ever.

[Chris]

Yeah. Not. Not. Not that big of a fan.

[Dan Powers]

I love a caprese salad.

[Sean]

Yeah.

[Chris]

Yeah.

[Dan Powers]

But, like, what am I doing putting this on a ciabatta and eating that? You fucking vegetarians. Put some meat in your sandwich or lose the bread. Imagine how good that would be with some prosciutto.

[Sean]

Yeah. Holy fuck.

[Dan Powers]

Unbelievable.

[Sean]

Prosciutt.

[Dan Powers]

Next up is a patty melt. Basically a burger with bread.

[Chris]

This looks like it would clog my art immediately.

[Sean]

And it actually, for some reason, patty melts enrage me because it is literally a burger. And they went like this. What if instead of the bun, it was bread? And I was like, why did you do that?

[Dan Powers]

Well, you gotta.

[Sean]

It pisses me off.

[Dan Powers]

But it's more than that, because it's. Yes, it is. It's like a grilled cheese. Like, they. It's like the toast. The bread is, like, you know, pan seared, fried, toasted.

[Sean]

It's fucking bullshit.

[Dan Powers]

It's kind of bullshit.

[Sean]

Give me my burger.

[Dan Powers]

But at the same time. Have you had a patty melt?

[Chris]

Prison burger?

[Sean]

Yeah. Yeah, right? It's like some guy.

[Dan Powers]

It looks like someone who wanted to make a burger, and they went, fuck, I didn't get buns.

[Sean]

Some guys, like, I opened up his. He's like, I lit a fire under my mattress. I squished it down for you. I make them burgers.

[Dan Powers]

I actually think that you would like a patty, Ma.

[Sean]

I like them. I'm just saying they enrage me. All right.

[Dan Powers]

I think this one's gonna be very volatile. Next one up is egg salad.

[Sean]

One of the great sandwiches of all time.

[Chris]

No, I would. If. No. If this was the menu and you ordered the egg salad sandwich, I'd judge you. I'd have to stop being friends with you, dude.

[Dan Powers]

I. I think egg salad sandwiches are

[Sean]

kind of good, everyone. Oh, I thought you're gonna say you hate them. Everybody hates them. I fucking love them, dude. They're pretty good. I'm kind of, though. I'm a little like how you said about the caprese. I like egg salad because I love eggs, but I'd rather it not in the sandwich. Like, I'll just eat it.

[Dan Powers]

Next up is a French dip with a little bit of au Jus good.

[Sean]

I don't like them as much as everyone else. Little messy. I.

[Dan Powers]

That's crazy.

[Sean]

I don't like soggy bread.

[Dan Powers]

Well, you do it by. By bite.

[Sean]

I know, but still, it's just like soggy bread.

[Dan Powers]

I think when the bread is. Is nice and soaked with the au jus, I think it's great. But again, I'm going to. I think I'm ordering a cheesesteak over a French every time.

[Sean]

Oh, yeah, yeah. Net.

[Dan Powers]

I. I'm prepared to stand on the table for this one.

[Sean]

Here we go. Dude, here comes.

[Dan Powers]

Next up is PB and J.

[Chris]

Boo.

[Dan Powers]

I I. Dude, I know they taste good.

[Sean]

Then what is your problem?

[Dan Powers]

Be an adult eating a pb. I've said this on the show.

[Sean]

Jimmy Crosby has a peanut butter and jelly every day at 5pm I. I have.

[Chris]

Sorry. So as an adult, you can't have tasty food. Yeah, no, you said you, you said you acknowledge they taste well, but you can't have them because you're an adult.

[Dan Powers]

I've said this on the show before. Again, this is a dumb Dan take, but I'm like, dude, a PB and J, what are we doing?

[Chris]

You know what? I understand the kind of childishness of it, but I was 25 years old when I had my first ever PB&J.

[Sean]

Shit.

[Chris]

Never had it in Ireland. Your parents hate you.

[Sean]

Yeah.

[Chris]

And. And yeah, I thought it was great. And I made it in the car in a national park.

[Sean]

Nice.

[Chris]

And it was fantastic. Wow.

[Sean]

That's a special first.

[Dan Powers]

They're fantastic.

[Chris]

And, you know, so I don't think that they need to be exclusively for children, but I understand that they seem a little childlike. It seems like it's lacking a main course.

[Dan Powers]

I just. To me, listen again, I know they taste good. I'm also a big PB and Jam guy. Like, I want jam, not jelly.

[Sean]

Yeah.

[Dan Powers]

Jelly is a little crazy for me.

[Chris]

Wait, what's the difference?

[Sean]

There's such a good.

[Dan Powers]

Sean, here's a funny story. When I. It's. It's. It's actually funny. When I was at prep school, a guy on the soccer team named Roo, who is from Scotland. Yes. I just wanted to make sure I did not completely insult Ru.

[Sean]

Yep.

[Dan Powers]

But we. I was like, I'm gonna go make a PB and J. And he was like, what is that? And I go, peanut butter and jelly. And he goes, peanut butter and jelly.

[Chris]

And the.

[Dan Powers]

The disgust in his mouth, in his voice was like, insane. And I was like, yeah. And he was like, that is truly the most disgusting thing of all time. And I was like, dude, it's amazing you've never had one. He was like, no. And I was like, I'll make you one. He was like, I absolutely. I will never eat that. And then weeks later, I was eating a PB&J, and he looked at it and he was like, what is that? That looks good. And I was like, are you fucking crazy? He thought jelly was jello.

[Chris]

Yeah, well, that's what in. In Ireland we call. Yeah.

[Dan Powers]

So he was like, you're making a peanut butter and jello sandwich. And I was like, to be fair, that does sound gross.

[Sean]

That does are.

[Dan Powers]

But the difference between jelly and jam is you can't jelly your d. No, I'm just kidding.

[Sean]

It's a great joy.

[Dan Powers]

Jelly is, like, a little more, like, globby. Jam usually has, like, seeds in it. And it's more of like. It's like when you. When you have. When you have, like, a. Like a. A biscuit with, like, clotted cream and jam, it's. That's the jam you'll find in the UK or Ireland more often is like.

[Chris]

We'd call jello jelly. Yeah. And so, like, a PB and J for us would be a peanut butter and jam.

[Dan Powers]

Yeah.

[Chris]

Because we'd call that. Yeah.

[Sean]

Have you ever had fluff?

[Chris]

Fluff.

[Dan Powers]

Marshmallow fluff?

[Chris]

No.

[Dan Powers]

So this was also. It's a Massachusetts thing. It's called a fluffernutter. Fluff is like. It's a tub of, like, spread marshmallow.

[Chris]

Yeah.

[Dan Powers]

And you make peanut butter and fluff.

[Sean]

Dude. Sean, literally just. I would like you to go.

[Dan Powers]

They're all time.

[Sean]

I would like you to Google fluff and then look at the thing that comes up on the right side down a little bit.

[Dan Powers]

There it is.

[Sean]

That is fluff.

[Chris]

Oh, you put that in your body?

[Sean]

Dude, we would. I would just.

[Dan Powers]

Marshmallow.

[Sean]

I would lather that onto bread.

[Chris]

Is it like. Is this. It's cold.

[Dan Powers]

Yeah, it's like, room tip, Like.

[Sean]

Yeah, room tip. And then I would lather that marshmallow fluff with peanut butter.

[Dan Powers]

And we used to put that on with peanut butter and make a fluffernutter sandwich.

[Sean]

It was godlike.

[Dan Powers]

There it is right there.

[Chris]

Oh, yeah. Actually, it looks pretty good when it's, like, toasted like that a little bit.

[Dan Powers]

They are amazing.

[Sean]

One of the great sandwiches of all time.

[Dan Powers]

All right, we gotta keep moving. But P.B. and J. I guess my point is, I just like. If I'm putting food in my body, a pb, I'M like, I'll eat it, obviously, but I'd just rather anything else. Next up is a torta.

[Sean]

Good. I don't even know what that is. Hate it.

[Dan Powers]

You've never had a torta at, like, a Mexican restaurant.

[Sean]

Oh, is that. Oh, that means sandwich, right?

[Dan Powers]

They're great. Next up is a roast beef sandwich. Love.

[Sean]

I always hated a roast beef. I don't know why. As a little kid, I'd open my lunchbox at school, and I'd see my mom chose roast beef that day, and I'd be like, damn.

[Chris]

Fuck.

[Sean]

I like it more now, but it's still. I have scars.

[Chris]

That's a good lunch.

[Dan Powers]

I've actually never heard of this one. It's a Jambon burri.

[Sean]

Hate it. Looks horrible. It looks like one piece of ham.

[Chris]

Yeah.

[Dan Powers]

This looks simple.

[Chris]

It's 80 bread.

[Sean]

It's all bread. Dude, this sandwich.

[Dan Powers]

Yeah, this feels like a very French. This is definitely a French. This is like a baguette with, like,

[Chris]

a, you know, World War II ration.

[Dan Powers]

Yeah, it's like a baguette with, like, one slice of ham and brie cheese. Yeah, I bet it's great. Next up, we've got a Tonkatsu.

[Chris]

Looks amazing.

[Dan Powers]

Looks amazing.

[Sean]

What the is it?

[Dan Powers]

Chicken tonkotsu. It's. It's like a. It's a fry. Like a. It's kind of like a fried cutlet.

[Sean]

It's like a Milanese.

[Dan Powers]

Not really. So it's gonna be a little. A little thicker, I think. But those. These sandwiches are amazing. Monte Cristo next.

[Sean]

Great.

[Chris]

So good. You remember from Disney.

[Dan Powers]

Oh, yeah. Sure have.

[Chris]

So good.

[Dan Powers]

Next up, we got a classic ham and cheese. Kind of boring.

[Sean]

It's just. You want to talk childish? Dude, ham and cheese.

[Chris]

All right.

[Dan Powers]

I love. I love, love ham.

[Chris]

I know it's simple, but it's like a classic for a reason.

[Dan Powers]

It is. You can also dress it up like. This one's got some lettuce.

[Sean]

Yeah.

[Dan Powers]

Looks like some cheese or mayo in there. I love, like, a good ham and cheese. Like, really get some pickles in there

[Chris]

super fast to make as well.

[Sean]

Yeah, yeah. Then you can't dress it up very good. You could remember that ham and cheese in a pita you used to get.

[Dan Powers]

Yeah, dude. The Dan.

[Sean]

Yeah.

[Dan Powers]

Really creative Dan. Bagel with lox. Not again. I'm not a bagel guy, but I do think it's good.

[Sean]

Pretty good.

[Chris]

The moment you take a bite out of this, it's all gonna start, like, oozing.

[Dan Powers]

It all falls out.

[Chris]

Yeah.

[Dan Powers]

But this does have Red onion and capers on there. It looks like chive cream cheese. That's pretty fucking gas. Next up, we've got a falafel pita. Nope. Listen, it is good, but if I'm gonna have my take on caprese sandwich, I have to stay consistent. I like falafel, but it's just not what I'm gonna pick. Next up, we got a chicken salad.

[Sean]

Love. One of my favorite sandwiches ever made.

[Dan Powers]

Love a chicken salad.

[Sean]

I will get it at pretty much any sandwich shop I go to. I judge. You know how you judge your Italian restaurant on their tier? Misu. Yeah, I judge. I. I judge every sandwich shop I've ever been to on their chicken salad.

[Dan Powers]

Yeah.

[Chris]

Would you pick the egg salad over the chicken salad? No.

[Dan Powers]

You would not?

[Chris]

Yeah.

[Dan Powers]

No.

[Chris]

Okay.

[Dan Powers]

We've got a veggie and hummus sandwich. I'm going to be honest. It looks really good, but again, I just. I'm not eating a sandwich if there's not meat in it. Bologna.

[Sean]

Awful.

[Dan Powers]

Not into it. Yeah, not into it. But I don't. I don't disparage because I will say Linden Street Deli, where I went to college, there was a sandwich shop called Linden Street Deli, and they had a sandwich called the American Sandwich. And there was bologna on it. And there was other things on it, too, and it was very good.

[Sean]

Yeah.

[Dan Powers]

But I'm not picking bologna. We've got an Italian beef. I don't love them.

[Sean]

I do like these. If there's the right. They're correct.

[Dan Powers]

This is a very soggy sandwich.

[Sean]

Yeah, good point, actually.

[Dan Powers]

Very soggy sandwich.

[Chris]

Sandwich.

[Dan Powers]

Italian beef is good, but it's not my favorite.

[Sean]

Yeah.

[Dan Powers]

And then we've got a Kentucky Hot Brown. Never heard of this in my damn life. It looks insane.

[Sean]

You can't be eating that, dude.

[Dan Powers]

No. And then we've got a Bocadillo.

[Sean]

Never heard of it.

[Dan Powers]

Fine. Liverwurst. Hardest. Disgusting. And then cucumber tea.

[Sean]

Horrible.

[Chris]

You can't be putting vital organs in your sand.

[Dan Powers]

No, no, no, no, no. Absolutely insane. All right. That was our sandwich rundown, and that was amazing. I do want to go to our next photo. This can be quicker. We're not going to go through anything here, but this got. I was on this train looking at grids of choices, and it got me thinking of the ice cream truck. And I found this awesome menu. Photo of an ice cream truck menu. And this is also going to be a heavy. I'm going to judge you two as people based on what you pick here.

[Sean]

I'm a trash.

[Dan Powers]

I think that there are some choices on here that if you went to the ice cream truck and you and Sean. I know what you're going to say already. Money's no option here. Daddy's paying. So don't worry.

[Sean]

Don't worry about.

[Dan Powers]

Thank you. Don't worry about the prices listed. I am passionate about some of these.

[Sean]

Can you just go? Are you going to list the ones you're passionate about or do you want to just go? Do you want to say them? And we'll go hand up or hand down if we want.

[Dan Powers]

No, no, we don't have to go through the whole thing because again, people will be able to see this. Hopefully you're watching. But there are some that I'm like, are you out of your mind? If you would order these things and I know people who ordered them.

[Sean]

Yeah.

[Dan Powers]

Right off the bat, I'm gonna say the frozen lemonade ones. It's like the cup where it's like frozen. Strawberry frozen. Dude, if you order that, you're nuts.

[Chris]

I think every. I'd be happy with. Especially if I'm not paying for it. I'd be happy with every single one of these here. There's not a single one that I would say no to.

[Sean]

I have a really hard time turning down the Twix bar, Snickers bar Oreo, and the chip. The chocolate chip cookie with the chips around the side.

[Chris]

Sometimes if those ones are, like, too frozen.

[Sean]

Yeah, yeah. Carmel isn't like. You know what?

[Dan Powers]

It goes both ways, too. If they're too melty, it's even worse. It's a disaster. The frozen Snickers and Twix do need to be pretty perfect.

[Sean]

Yep. And then I was pretty much every time. And I'm about to get sewered, I think, by Dan. But that Ninja Turtle head. No, automatic.

[Chris]

That looks pretty good.

[Sean]

Automatic. Those are phenomenal automatic. And I would probably dabble with the sonic head, too.

[Chris]

Just.

[Dan Powers]

Yeah, I like the way we were

[Chris]

like PB and J.

[Sean]

No, that's for kids.

[Chris]

Give me a Ninja Turtle.

[Sean]

Turtle.

[Dan Powers]

We're talking about an ice cream truck right now. The Frozen Spider Man. SpongeBob Dude. Tweety Bird, Sonic Ninja Turtle, Powerpuff Girl. Yeah. You got gum in the eyeballs. And it was like that cool, like, fruit flavor. It was like ice cream, but not ice cream.

[Sean]

So good.

[Dan Powers]

Those things were pretty gas.

[Sean]

The only other one for me is that strawberry shortcake Riches Pop.

[Dan Powers]

Okay.

[Chris]

Yeah, Totally good.

[Dan Powers]

I With those Dude Riches bars. The strawberry shortcake, the chocolate shortcake, and the cookies and Cream bar. Those things hit like black tar heroin when you were a kid. There was like the crumble cookie outside, ice cream inside. It was on a stick, so it wasn't that messy.

[Sean]

Yep.

[Dan Powers]

Those things were so good. Unbelievable.

[Sean]

And Dan, I've never even heard of these. Richest pops at the top. The. The sour ones. But those are probably awesome.

[Dan Powers]

Yeah, you probably like those. You probably like crybabies too.

[Chris]

Sour ice cream, though.

[Dan Powers]

I mean, not be great. Not for me. Listen, I love a. What are the. The drum. I love a drumstick.

[Sean]

Yeah, the big dippers.

[Chris]

Yeah, yeah.

[Dan Powers]

We're gonna call drumstick.

[Chris]

Well, I'm just thinking of now, though, is every single time my entire childhood. If you ever got an ice cream that was like a Sonic or like a Spider man or something, it would always come out looking mutated.

[Sean]

Dude, I was ready to say that.

[Dan Powers]

Deranged. It look absolutely possessed.

[Chris]

It's always so disappointing when you come out and spongebob fucking Salvador.

[Dan Powers]

Spongebob never looked like spongebob.

[Sean]

Salvador Dali melted face painting. And I'm like, jesus Christ, dude.

[Dan Powers]

I do want to show love to the good humor ice cream sandwich.

[Sean]

Sandwich. Okay. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Dan Powers]

The classic ice cream sandwich. Two cookies. Vanilla ice cream with the chocolate.

[Sean]

Oh, yeah, yeah. That thing at the bottom.

[Dan Powers]

Chocolate sprinkles or little chocolate chips. Chocolate chips on the outside.

[Sean]

I mean, that ice cream sandwich with the black. Like the way for the black wafer thing is money.

[Dan Powers]

A classic giant ice cream sandwich. Yeah, ice cream sandwiches are good.

[Chris]

This is a terrible discussion. Everything looks really good. The only questionable thing was the sour rice.

[Dan Powers]

I don't know, Sean. The froze fruit pop. You're a.

[Sean]

Were you guys rocket pop guys?

[Dan Powers]

I liked it, but I, I. To me, getting a popsicle at the ice cream truck is crazy.

[Chris]

Yeah, you want to get like, gold

[Sean]

if you daddy's paying.

[Dan Powers]

You are an absolute. If you get the frozen fruit pop. Yeah.

[Sean]

Oh, damn.

[Dan Powers]

I, I would not be friends with you if you ordered that with me. I'd be like, get out of here.

[Sean]

Frozen fruit pop. That is insane.

[Dan Powers]

When was the last time you guys had, like, a fudge sickle?

[Chris]

Oh, fuck, it's gonna be today. We're gonna get one right after this.

[Dan Powers]

I swear to God. If one of you guys goes and finds Fudgesicles at one of the shops around the corner, I will eat a fudge sicle with you.

[Chris]

Let's do it.

[Dan Powers]

I can't remember the last time I had one.

[Sean]

Me neither.

[Dan Powers]

All right, let us get into fraud Watch. And top hits. This is a fun Game that we do, where we're talking about things that are on our fraud watch. Things that are on our top hits, good and bad. Chris, why don't you start. Start with fraud watch.

[Sean]

Fraud watch for me is big beers. I love a beer. I'll have a crispy cold beer whenever I want. 12 ounces is an incredible size for a beer and I would even go up to 16 in a pint. Any beer bigger than that can fuck itself. Because all that happens interesting is it gets warm and dude, I don't like beer that much. Warm beer is appalling to me to the point that I will literally pour it out and go buy a new beer. And now I've wasted beer and money and all the places that have big beers are just being like, oh, you want a big one because you're so cool. And I'm like, no, you want to see how cool I am? Watch this. I'll have another, please.

[Chris]

So what was your maximum size again?

[Sean]

16 ounce pint.

[Chris]

16 ounce.

[Sean]

Anything above a pint is just getting warm and ruining my beer drinking experience. Yeah, and there's, there's maybe the argument like, well, now you don't have to get up and get another one so quickly. But I'm like, it doesn't matter because this beer has been ruined for me.

[Chris]

It's not, it's just temperature. It's not that it kind of goes stale or anything like that.

[Sean]

Mostly temperature.

[Dan Powers]

Yeah. It's.

[Sean]

It's just.

[Dan Powers]

And you know what? C.P.

[Sean]

i'm going to.

[Dan Powers]

I'm completely on your side here.

[Sean]

It's. It's summer, dude. And I'm like, I'm outside, I'm drinking beers in the sun. This is amazing. And someone's like this, you want a 32 ouncer.

[Dan Powers]

And it's funny when they do that too. They almost challenge your manhood when they're like this. You want a 16 ounce or 24. And like if you're like 16 ounce, people are like, oh, pussy. Only time big beer is acceptable is if you are skiing and you're outdoors. If you're at an outdoor bar.

[Chris]

Oh.

[Dan Powers]

Because then you're, you're outside.

[Sean]

Really good one. Yeah.

[Dan Powers]

Keeps the beer cold.

[Sean]

And I will allow that now that you say it.

[Dan Powers]

But, but I. Otherwise I'm completely with you.

[Sean]

It's just because it's summer.

[Dan Powers]

And I think, I know people are gonna say, drink the beer faster, you jackalope. I would to that I would say,

[Sean]

and I don't feel well.

[Dan Powers]

But it is fair. We could drink faster.

[Sean]

No no, that's uncomfortable. But chugging that amount of beer quick enough to keep it cold is uncomfortable.

[Dan Powers]

Yeah, listen, I said I'm completely on your side. I'm just trying to troubleshoot for what people are gonna say to us.

[Sean]

Well, those people are idiots. You're drinking beer too fast. Those people are idiots. And they like warm piss beer.

[Dan Powers]

Dude, I'm on your side. My fraud watch is camping. And I know. I knew you were going to hate this one, but like my live music at bars. Take. I have a caveat. I love everything about camping until the sleeping.

[Sean]

Oh, okay.

[Dan Powers]

I. I frequently say no to camping invites because. And listen, we all know by now that I am a bougie bitch. I am. I know. Know thyself, Socrates.

[Sean]

Yeah. Was that it?

[Dan Powers]

I just. I love being outside. Was it Socrates?

[Sean]

Know thyself was an ancient Greek aphorism inscribed on the temple of Apollo at Delphi. While it was traditionally ascribed to the seven sages of ancient Greece or the God Apollo himself, the phrase was made famous by the philosopher Socrates and his student Plato.

[Chris]

Nice job.

[Sean]

That was an actually all time poll.

[Chris]

Boom.

[Sean]

That was an all time. Okay.

[Dan Powers]

I love sitting by a fire, cooking food on an outdoor grill, being in the stars. Hopefully there's a lake nearby. I love all that sleeping in a tent. I think everyone actually hates. I think the only people who enjoy sleeping in a tent are true rugged people who are just kind of tapped. But because for me, every time in the tent it's either like. I feel like we romanticize the idea about being cozy in the tent with a sleeping bag and a bunch of blankets and the stars and the noises outside and like that's great, but like I can get a noise machine.

[Chris]

Yeah.

[Dan Powers]

Open the window.

[Sean]

Yeah. Yeah.

[Dan Powers]

I. I just feel like every time you sleep in a tent, you wake up and you're so sore from sleeping on the ground. Even if you have like a little pad, like a camping pad, or if you're. If you're camping out around out here you like. We go to Joshua Tree in camp. Sometimes you wake up at 6am at the crack of dawn because your tent is now a greenhouse because it's a billion degrees in there.

[Chris]

You know, you don't have to sleep in a tent when you go out camping.

[Dan Powers]

Well, this is my bivy.

[Chris]

And just sleep under the sun.

[Sean]

So this is what this is. I was going to say get a what A bivvy.

[Dan Powers]

What the fuck is that little.

[Chris]

It's a. It's a. Like a. I think. I don't even know If I know how to pronounce. It's like biovacking. Biovacking something.

[Sean]

Yeah.

[Chris]

It's like when you just sleep in like a thick sleeping bag that's like rainproof and like. Oh yeah.

[Dan Powers]

Keeps you warm, but that's. You're sleeping on the ground.

[Sean]

Okay. So, but yeah, this was going to say that's.

[Dan Powers]

That is ass. Sleeping on the ground is ass.

[Chris]

You can, you can take an air mattress if you like.

[Sean]

I believe you're right and that no one, even real campers like sleeping in a tent.

[Dan Powers]

Like, everyone goes camping and then they get back to their bed and they lay in their bed and they're like, this is so nice.

[Sean]

And I'm like, yeah, they just sleep in the, they sleep in the tent because that's the price to pay for all the things they love about camping.

[Dan Powers]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Sean]

But if you do that, Sean, that I actually do fuck with because you are just under the stars where I'm

[Dan Powers]

like, that's what I'm saying.

[Sean]

But like, this is amazing.

[Dan Powers]

Yeah. Like I, I listen, I love being outside. It's, it's. The sleeping element of camping is just.

[Chris]

I feel like everyone, it's by nature not going to be as comfortable as if you're in like a hotel, because a hotel is designed to create as comfortable environment from you. If, if you were as comfortable sleeping out on like in a tent or under stars, there would be no industry for real estate or hotels or anything else. So if you're comparing it to sleeping in a mattress or a bed. Yes. Objectively you're going to get a better sleep in a real bed.

[Dan Powers]

Well, I just, I feel like what I'm getting at is I, I side with glampers.

[Sean]

Yeah.

[Dan Powers]

People. People who get the RV and then go sleep in the bed in the RV or people like, have you ever seen the episode of Parks and Rec where they're camping and Tom Haverford's tent is like everything from Sky Mall. And it's like, I'm like, that looks like awesome camping. I would, I would love to camp with Tom Haverford. I just wonder if there's a market for like whether it's a, an air mattress or like one of those roll up cot mattresses that you bring, like

[Chris]

with that type of fun. It's like glamping. Glamping is definitely going to be a better experience, so.

[Dan Powers]

But you just admitted that part of camping is the sacrifice of your comfort.

[Chris]

It's the fulfillment of your achievement. It's the self sufficient.

[Sean]

Dan. Dan. Surfing has a paddle out skiing has a chairlift. Like, the fun things we do have a part that you make sacrifices for.

[Dan Powers]

Why. Why can't we just. Why can't it all be great?

[Sean]

I agree. I wish someone would pick me up on my surfboard and just drop me beyond the waves. And I wish that I could teleport to the top of the mountain. I really do, but I can't. And camping, you get to grill on an open fire and fish in the creek, and then at night, you have to go get in the tent.

[Dan Powers]

I. The point of this fraud watch for me is like, I wish I went camping more, but I always say no, because I'm like, I don't want to sleep in a fucking tent.

[Sean]

No. Thy.

[Dan Powers]

Know thyself.

[Chris]

That's okay as well. If you know what, it's an unusual thing we do to choose to do hard things. Yes.

[Dan Powers]

But. Okay, so this is why. This is why Fraud wise exists, is because, again, Fraud watch is not saying these things suck. They're saying we're putting them on fraud watch for a specific reason. I think the paddle out of surfing the chairlift of skiing is nowhere near as bad as the shit sleep of Cami. And then there's also the element of, like, if you're really grogging it, like, roughing it, like we do at Joshua Tree, and you're, like, shitting in a ditch too, that kind of sucks as well.

[Chris]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Like, we.

[Dan Powers]

Camping is so awesome until that moment. And I feel like I would go on a camping trip for, like, four days if it wasn't like this. But I feel like people go camping for one night because it's so bad.

[Sean]

Yeah.

[Dan Powers]

We could blow up the whole camping industry if we just improve the sleep of camping.

[Sean]

Like, tense. Yeah. We'll figure out this.

[Chris]

Yeah.

[Dan Powers]

John, what's your fraud watch?

[Chris]

My fraud watch? Astrology. I think it's just cosmic racism. I think it's just discrimination for the girlies.

[Sean]

Yeah. Okay, dude, go elaborate, please.

[Dan Powers]

I. I love this. And also, I have. I have a tactic that I do with people who are into astrology.

[Chris]

Oh. When you. When they're like. Oh, it's just like when you tell them to guess what you are if they believe in it.

[Dan Powers]

No, I will be.

[Chris]

Well, close.

[Sean]

That's good, though.

[Dan Powers]

I'll be talking to someone who's into astrology, and they'll be like, going on and on and on and on on about it. And they go, what's your sign? And I'll go like this. Scorpio. Scorpio. A Sign. Probably I'll say a sign. That is not what I am. And they go, knew. It totally makes sense. And then they start listing these things, and I go, actually, I'm a Leo.

[Sean]

Yeah.

[Dan Powers]

And then they are, like, lying about that is such a Leo thing to do. And I'm like, you actually. I'm a fucking cancer. Suck me. It's just like. It is all bullshit.

[Sean]

Dude, a double one. That's good, Dan.

[Dan Powers]

You should, you should double it up.

[Sean]

Initiate a double. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Chris]

The, the double strategy is a good one. All right. Because it's. I always just go like, they're like, oh, what's your, what's your star sign? What's your sun sign?

[Sean]

Or whatever.

[Chris]

And I'm like, well, you tell me. Yeah, if it's so accurate, you tell

[Dan Powers]

me there are sun.

[Chris]

Oh, there's a whole. Because the, the beauty of the bullshitter is that they just basically have. They can divide it into so many different aspects of, like, you basically cover the entire thing. And people go like, oh, it's just pattern recognition. Is it like. No, it's your ability to see patterns where there are not. It's. You're seeing faces in the, in the clouds. But specifically, the thing that. Because if you want to believe in all this stuff, that's fine. It's totally fine by me. Where it gets annoying for me is when you start discriminating based on it, because it is just like, oh, you're asparagus rising. We could never be friends because I'm an aquarium.

[Dan Powers]

The aquarium.

[Chris]

The.

[Dan Powers]

Yeah, it, it's just like.

[Chris]

I don't know. I just. In my bones, I know that there's some, like, HR lady who's not hiring people because they're like, oh, it's a Leo. We can't have that.

[Sean]

That would throw the whole office out of whack.

[Chris]

Throw. Yeah. You just know that that's, like, a thing that's happening. But, yeah, I think it's, it's time we, we get rid of it.

[Sean]

Because our buddy Rob always says, Mercury's in Gatorade. He's like, I think Mercury's in Gatorade. It's so good.

[Chris]

Well, I, I, I've worked with people before who have been really into it, and anytime there's, like, an issue, it would always be like, oh, Mercury's in retrograde. And I'm like, when? First of all, when is Mercury not really great? It seems like it's always in retrograde.

[Dan Powers]

Always retrograde. It's truly constantly retrograding.

[Sean]

That's so good.

[Dan Powers]

You know what, dude? I actually. I have started to believe in the universe. Like, I believe that there is a cosmic.

[Chris]

That it exists.

[Sean]

Yeah.

[Dan Powers]

Yeah. I think it's out there, dude. No, no.

[Sean]

I have awesome news.

[Dan Powers]

I do think that. I believe that, like, the. There is something that dictates what happens, like, consciously.

[Sean]

Oh, good question.

[Dan Powers]

Maybe. Do you know what I'm. Do you know what I'm saying?

[Chris]

I think most people. That's, like, a religion, I think.

[Sean]

Yeah.

[Dan Powers]

But I'm not into that. I believe that, like, the. The Earth and, like, the universe and the planets and the stars do have an impact on life and, like, what is going on. But I. I am with you. Like, I think astrology is nonsense. Well, I just don't like the.

[Chris]

I just. Every time a girl asks me, like, oh, what time were you born? Deep down in my brain, I'm like, I know you would have. I know where you would have stood in the Civil War. Yeah. Yeah.

[Dan Powers]

It's craziness, dude.

[Sean]

This. I have great news. Mercury is currently in. Mercury. Mercury. Yeah. Yeah. But the Mercury retrograde ends July 23, 2026, tomorrow.

[Chris]

Wow.

[Dan Powers]

And then when does it start again? July 30.

[Sean]

October. October. But then this headline on In Vogue says, has this been the worst Mercury retrograde ever? We are currently in the. We are currently. Gentlemen, we have lived. We have just lived through the worst Mercury retrograde of all time.

[Dan Powers]

So things are about to.

[Chris]

Wait, wait, so hang on.

[Dan Powers]

What?

[Chris]

When does it end?

[Sean]

Tomorrow.

[Dan Powers]

Things are about to get October, and

[Chris]

this is the worst.

[Sean]

Is the worst one. This is the worst one, dude.

[Chris]

So D. Day landing.

[Sean]

Yeah.

[Chris]

Okay. No, that wasn't as bad as.

[Sean]

What?

[Dan Powers]

No, no, this has been horrible. Yeah.

[Sean]

And, bro, I started to read, it was like this. It says this year's Mercury retrograde in cancer is one for the books. We've all felt it in some capacity or another, whether it's former lovers lurking on your Instagram story, workplace drama, or seemingly random antagonistic experiences on the street. So aggravating that if you wanted to, you could surely get them trending on threads. And I'm like, yes, this is hard.

[Dan Powers]

So that's what I would want.

[Sean]

Like, yeah, this is horrible. My top hits, light dimmers. Dimming a light is so sick. And I have only had a few, if ever, in houses in my life. And when you can do it, I was like, oh, wow, that's awesome. And then I was like, what a luxury, because this is a dimmer.

[Dan Powers]

Yeah.

[Sean]

And then I kind of grew up and realized, you can just get dimmers. It wasn't specific to that electrical feat of engineering. You can just get a dimmer and then make that light a dimmer too. And we, we do it in here with this. Made me put me onto it yesterday when you were like, can we get the whole phone dim?

[Dan Powers]

Yeah.

[Sean]

And I was like, oh, yeah, that was cool. And then it. I realized that there is pretty much maybe the kitchen, but other than that, there's pretty much no light in my entire home that I wouldn't prefer on a dim. Because sometimes I'm like, oh, we're watching a movie in the living room or in the bathroom. I just woke up and I'm like, I don't want this. That bright for sure. And they're sick and they're so easy. And we should be dimming lights more.

[Chris]

Dude.

[Dan Powers]

Preach, brother.

[Sean]

You're.

[Dan Powers]

You are on fire today. Light dimmers are iconic. That's it. That's why I like candles in the house all the time. And people are like, you medieval bitch. And I'm like, it's just nice to have a little bit of light.

[Sean]

The.

[Chris]

You ever get one that's like, starts the light flickering though?

[Sean]

Oh, yeah, yeah. It's like a little rage if I can find this fuck.

[Dan Powers]

But a light, man, a light dimmer fucks. Awesome. Yeah, that's really good. My top hit for the week is sitting at the bar alone. Doesn't matter.

[Sean]

Okay.

[Dan Powers]

I saw a video the other day of this older woman, British woman, and some guy walked up to her and was like, hey, if you could go back to your 25 year old self, what would you do more? Well, what do you miss? And she was like, I'd go to

[Sean]

the local pub more.

[Dan Powers]

And I was like, wow. And she went on this brilliant soliloquy about how back then she. Every day they would go to work, they would go through whatever they're going through, and they would go. Every day they would go to the local pub. Yeah. And you could have a pint, you could do whatever. But it was a place to just talk and air out your grievances. Talk about what's frustrating you at work, talk about what's going on in life, talk about your new marriage or a vacation you just went on. And it just built community and it built friendships and a safety net and a place for people to talk. And I. On Sunday I went to a movie and I had no food in the house, so I went to my local pub.

[Sean]

Yeah.

[Dan Powers]

And I just had.

[Sean]

Is what Mel's the king said.

[Dan Powers]

Oh, And I went, I didn't drink. I went. I got a Diet Coke. But I just ate dinner at the. At the bar and talked to the bartenders and talked to a couple people sitting next to me, and I learned a bunch of stuff about these people. And we. I said, I just came from the Odyssey, and we talked about the Odyssey. And, dude, we have come around to. We say that expression touch grass all the time, and it literally means get outside. Yeah, dude, I. We are always bitching about Uber eats and delivery fees. And it's correct. Kevin o' Leary recently said that people are our age or not our age, but, like, millennials and Blower are going broke because they spend $28 on lunch every day.

[Sean]

Yeah.

[Dan Powers]

And he got a lot of flack for it. And I'm like, he's kind of right, dude. Like, if you just go. I mean, I make my lunch and bring it every day, and I can go to the grocery store and spend $100 for dinner and lunch for five straight days. And it's like, you can go to a place and get your lunch and it's less than getting it. Uber eats to you. And certainly you can do that with dinner. And I just. Like, we sat at the bar in Nashville and we were talking to the bartenders and a couple of the fellas next to us, and, man, this isn't even about drinking. It's like going and sitting at the bar, whether you're alone or with a couple is like, you just are forced to speak to people. And it's so delightful. Dude, it's like, I think so heavily that what we need in this life is more interaction and actual real world conversations, not talking online. And the pub is where you do that. It's like, we gotta set the bar more.

[Sean]

Go to the pub.

[Dan Powers]

Go to the pub. Go, go grab dinner.

[Chris]

I feel like, to your point, the last 20 years, we've kind of sacrificed a lot of experience for convenience.

[Dan Powers]

Yeah.

[Chris]

And now people are starting to rediscover that. They're like. Or they're discovering that they miss the experience and they're starting to rediscover those things.

[Dan Powers]

Definitely.

[Chris]

So, like. Yeah, I totally agree. I think it's a good take. But, like, just any social in person thing where you're forced to interact with strangers is probably a good thing.

[Dan Powers]

Definitely. And, like, the reason I said sit at the bar is because we all got to eat, right?

[Chris]

Yeah.

[Dan Powers]

And it's like, listen, I know I'm a big advocate for cooking at home, but a lot of people Uber, I Mean, Brett. Our good friend Brett overeats, like, almost every meal before Lily. Like, he was just like, I'm getting. Dude. If you're a single guy, crazy. If you're a single person, it's. That's insane. And you are ordering your food often. I implore you, find a local restaurant or pub that is walking distance or a short drive and just twice a week, go there for dinner and, like, sit at the bar.

[Sean]

Yeah.

[Dan Powers]

You will talk to people and you will have a great time.

[Sean]

Yeah, dude. I should have said this or say in the same vein. A pop in I. The other day was. I had kind of missed a workout window, and I wasn't. My roller game got canceled, and I was like, fuck. So I was like, let's go for a run. Which is so anti me. But Sandra wanted to go for a run.

[Chris]

Yeah.

[Sean]

And I was like, our buddy lives like a mile away. And I was like, you want to run to kits? And she was like, sure. So we just ran to kits. And I just knock on his door. He's sitting there watching Love Island Australia. And I go, yo. And he goes, dude, what's up? And I was like, nothing. Just popping in. And then we chatted for 20 minutes. And then I. And then I ran home.

[Chris]

Yeah.

[Sean]

And he was. He text me after. He's like, dude, that was awesome.

[Chris]

Do kids still do that today? Or they just.

[Sean]

Hell no, dude. They. They snap. They insta face. They insta face and. And snap. Gram their. Their dicks to each other. That's all they do. Nightmare. Oh, my God. What's your top hit, Sean?

[Chris]

I live near a park that has, like, a playground in it. I was walking by it the other day, walked through it as a shortcut. The ground is like this soft, rubbery material.

[Sean]

I know exactly what you're talking about. Yep.

[Chris]

That should be every sidewalk.

[Sean]

Yep.

[Chris]

Every street should be that material. It feels so nice to walk on.

[Sean]

It's amazing.

[Chris]

It's so good. It's like you're walking on a cloud.

[Sean]

Yes.

[Dan Powers]

Yeah.

[Sean]

Dude, where the fuck was I? I recently stepped on that unknowingly and. And gasped.

[Chris]

It was.

[Sean]

It was so. It was so excellent. I'm with you.

[Dan Powers]

Can we talk about innovation? That is genius for a playground.

[Sean]

Yeah.

[Chris]

Yeah.

[Dan Powers]

Like, the first time I saw one of those, I was like, well, I

[Chris]

think the playground should be the only place where it's hard because we have to call these weak kids the ones that fall off.

[Dan Powers]

So you want to replace all sidewalks with rubber?

[Sean]

Yeah.

[Chris]

Yeah.

[Sean]

And make all the playgrounds and Hard. Hard ass.

[Chris]

Toughen up these kids so that they're worthy for the sidewalk.

[Dan Powers]

Dude, you remember how bad it hurt when we used to fall on wood chips? Yeah, dude, wood chips were awful.

[Chris]

Who came up with the idea of being like, oh, we better make this surface okay. To fall on. These kids are going to be clumsy and falling off things all the time. Why don't we get like hard wood chippings so that it gets inside the cuts and everything? Like it's just the worst material.

[Sean]

Such a funny point. What?

[Dan Powers]

Well, let's be honest. It's probably. I mean it probably should have just been dirt. Like, I would have rather fallen under grass. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Sean]

We went, dude, wood floor, that would hurt, but shattered.

[Dan Powers]

Listen, let's think about this. Let's think about this.

[Sean]

Run.

[Dan Powers]

Now, it can't be cement because that would have really fucked us up. Like we would have been breaking bones and like splitting our heads open it. Grass is the ultimate. But I understand that if a bunch of kids are running around and playing on it, there's no way to maintain that grass. It would get ripped up. So then it's just a dirt pile. So then we're going back into class looking like fucking.

[Sean]

Yeah. Hillbillies. Yeah.

[Dan Powers]

Just covered in dirt. So I think wood chips was the only.

[Sean]

It was, it was turf, but we didn't have that yet. I don't think turf was accessible. So rubber rubber sidewalks now.

[Dan Powers]

Rubber sidewalks more.

[Sean]

Would that.

[Dan Powers]

Would rubber sidewalks be nice just because it feels nice?

[Chris]

Yeah. Same reason you were talking about camping being bad. We're camping every time we walk out onto the. The streets. We could be in a nice hotel. Yeah.

[Dan Powers]

Again.

[Chris]

Yeah.

[Dan Powers]

Yeah. Top hits rubber.

[Chris]

Yeah. People would walk more.

[Sean]

That's pretty good.

[Chris]

Be healthier.

[Sean]

They would be healthier. We're saving the world.

[Dan Powers]

Do you wonder though, like, does like when dogs pee on that And I pick dogs because I don't even want to get into the homeless peeing and

[Chris]

pooping on that or drunk people.

[Sean]

So true.

[Dan Powers]

That's probably bad because that rubber is probably so.

[Chris]

You know what I mean? Like, you wear rubber clothes, don't you? I feel like regardless of the material, if someone's peeing and pooping on something, I'm not going to trust it with a bit of rain washing that off. Regardless, I'm gonna have to, you know, not go near that part of the sidewalk again. And you know, most of American society is a shoes off household anyway. I don't roll around on the side.

[Dan Powers]

Do you think that.

[Chris]

I think majority yeah, shoes off. And I'm a shoes on guy.

[Sean]

You are.

[Chris]

I'm a shoes.

[Sean]

I'm a massive shoes.

[Dan Powers]

You think most of American society, every

[Chris]

one of my friends houses, when I walk in, it's like there's a pile of shoes at the door.

[Sean]

I'm getting there more. But this is a very not American thing.

[Dan Powers]

Need your friends.

[Sean]

Yeah, yeah.

[Dan Powers]

I. Dude, I don't even think this is where I was about to say this is one of the greatest fraud watch and top hits we've ever had. All these picks are amazing. And I don't want to get on a tangent, but, dude, shoes off households is a mandatory. I. I can't believe that we all don't know that.

[Chris]

Again, you gotta toughen up. Get the germs in there.

[Dan Powers]

No, listen, I. I love that take because I am a germs guy. But in your home, dude, it's just like your floors. We're walking around, especially in LA and like, cities like la, New York, you can't be tracking that stuff in your home.

[Sean]

I do not have time. The amount of times I go in and out of my house, I do not have time to be switching shoes.

[Chris]

I had a roommate.

[Sean]

It would take years off my life.

[Chris]

Foot baggies, like a little, like a thing.

[Dan Powers]

I've said this to you before. You need to get a pair of like, Birkenstocks that you leave at the back door.

[Sean]

Yep.

[Dan Powers]

So you're barefoot inside. And when you go outside, you go. They're literally there. Outside, you just slip in.

[Chris]

Another shark tank idea. It's like a car wash for your shoes. When you walk in, you put it in and shoot it cleans the bottom.

[Sean]

Like I would literally, because here's what happens to me. Now we are on a tangent, but I will go like this. I work out in my back courtyard, so I have my workout shoes right by the door. And then I'm like. So I'm coming over in my slip on Birkenstocks or barefoot or whatever, and I'm like, sit down, put my workout shoes on, go outside. And then I'm like, oops, I forgot to fill my water bottle. This I understand. But then I'm like, Or here's a better one. My water bottle runs out halfway through

[Dan Powers]

most of the time.

[Sean]

So then I'm like, oh, I need to go back inside, untie my shoes, come in, fill up the water bottle, come back outside, tie my shoes again, begin working out again. I'm like, I have to pee, Go back inside. This happens to me all the time. And I'm like, you think I am slipping my workout shoes on and off three times in a workout.

[Dan Powers]

This is exclusively a you problem.

[Sean]

I'm just. I understand that, but I'm saying for that reason, I am certainly wearing my shoes inside.

[Dan Powers]

I understand that, but I'm just saying there's a very easy solution to that issue.

[Sean]

Piss all over my shit.

[Dan Powers]

Phil, actually, why are you peeing in

[Sean]

the middle of a workout all the time?

[Dan Powers]

Just finish the workout.

[Sean]

I'm about to piss my pants.

[Chris]

Okay. This is the utopia that I would like to have is the rubber sidewalks. Yeah.

[Dan Powers]

Are inside our houses. Every.

[Chris]

Nobody. Yeah. Inside the house. Outside, everywhere is rubber sidewalk. It's like an insane asylum, but only on the ground. And everyone's walking around. You can walk around shoeless and sockless because the streets are cleaned. And if you're caught peeing or pooping, and if the dogs are caught peeing and pooping, they're euthanized.

[Sean]

Yes. That's fine, dude. That's fine.

[Chris]

There's a special area of the sidewalk. They can.

[Sean]

They can pee and poop with proper drainage.

[Chris]

Yeah. And it's a police surveillance state.

[Sean]

It's actually the police because everything else is so perfect in the utopia, the police only sit by that area.

[Dan Powers]

Yeah.

[Sean]

Like, every employed cop just stands on the rooftops. Yeah. In shifts. Around that area to blast the brains out of whoever.

[Chris]

But they don't do it on site because we can't have their gross blood on the sidewalk.

[Dan Powers]

Yeah.

[Chris]

They just, like. They'll take a special execution place. We can make camps.

[Sean]

Yeah. They have to go camp.

[Chris]

And it's hard ground in the camps.

[Sean]

That's your life. Incredible, dude. Incredible. Okay, let's finish this off with a blind ranking.

[Chris]

All right.

[Dan Powers]

We're going to do a blind ranking. Best movie theater snacks. Sean, take us away.

[Sean]

Sean's our movie guy. I'm excited about this. And this. Sean, for record, do you have you

[Dan Powers]

made yourself a list? Are you going to do this off the top of the head?

[Chris]

Top of my head. Wow.

[Sean]

And this is going to be things.

[Dan Powers]

I don't trust that.

[Sean]

No, I can't.

[Chris]

Because.

[Dan Powers]

No, because if it's off the top of his head, he can dictate by what we say. I need him to. I need him to write down five right now.

[Sean]

I trust him. I trust them.

[Chris]

All right.

[Sean]

And, Sean, these are things that you can reasonably buy at movie.

[Chris]

Yeah.

[Dan Powers]

We're going to live in the realm of AMC theaters.

[Sean]

Yeah.

[Chris]

Okay.

[Sean]

Yep. And it's not so. Not just candy, but not like things that are. They don't serve that food like this is anything.

[Dan Powers]

Yeah, but like AMC serves like chips and nachos. They serve like pretzels.

[Chris]

So. So it can be like the packaged candy things as well.

[Dan Powers]

Yeah, yeah, absolutely. It should be. It should be.

[Chris]

You ready? Yes. Number one, dots. Five.

[Sean]

Because you know why? You know why?

[Dan Powers]

Dots fucking suck.

[Sean]

Dude, it's gonna rip my tooth.

[Dan Powers]

Yes, they get stuck in your teeth and they're gross.

[Sean]

No, they're not gross. They're not gross, but they are dots. My tooth, Dink. They're gonna rip my tooth out and I don't have time to go to the dentist mid movie.

[Dan Powers]

I will fight anyone who fucking likes dots.

[Sean]

You'll fight someone?

[Dan Powers]

Yes. Dots are. I'll fight someone who's willing to stand on business for dots.

[Sean]

Dots are good.

[Dan Powers]

Dots are trash. You don't like. You have not eaten dots in decades.

[Chris]

Think.

[Sean]

No, I said that you're gonna suck. I was gonna say.

[Dan Powers]

Yeah. And that makes them suck. Dots stink.

[Chris]

Five.

[Sean]

Five.

[Chris]

All right, Sour patch kids.

[Sean]

So, Dan, here's where it gets tricky. Oh, no, dude, this is my one candy.

[Dan Powers]

Yeah, but it's not the best movie theater snack.

[Sean]

But there's a thing that could come that is obviously one.

[Dan Powers]

Yeah. Here's the thing. I am not a sowies guy, but

[Sean]

if that thing doesn't come, this is one.

[Dan Powers]

Absolutely not. I am not a sowies guy.

[Sean]

It's insane.

[Dan Powers]

Again, these aren't snacks. These are movie theater snacks. This is two Sauis is not my like, go to. But I know that people love Sally's. And listen, when you have Sally's and I don't have anything, I'm like, give me one.

[Sean]

Yeah.

[Dan Powers]

Soies are number two perfect. And that's great.

[Sean]

And they. I'm gonna be pissed if they're not one. If one thing doesn't come.

[Chris]

But okay, two peanut M M's.

[Sean]

Very strong, very strong. But I could three go four to leave space for some.

[Dan Powers]

I don't think that anything's gonna get better than that.

[Sean]

Dude, are you kidding?

[Dan Powers]

And I'm talking again. Movie theater snacks. It's. It's a hard shell candy. It's not going to get on your hands. It's not going to get messy. They're delicious peanut M M's. I have shout out my friend Liza. I am going to say again, peanut butter M and Ms. Are fucking crack.

[Sean]

I know. And that could come Dan.

[Dan Powers]

I don't think he's going to do two types of M and Ms.

[Sean]

But there's another Thing. I think we have to go four.

[Dan Powers]

I don't think so. What? There's one clear one.

[Chris]

Yeah.

[Sean]

And there's another. There's a two other things.

[Dan Powers]

Really?

[Sean]

Yeah. Peanut.

[Dan Powers]

M. M's four. I'm trusting.

[Sean]

I think we're gonna be happy.

[Dan Powers]

I'm trusting you.

[Sean]

M and M's four.

[Chris]

All right. Popcorn. One.

[Sean]

Okay. Obvious.

[Dan Powers]

No question about it.

[Sean]

We had to leave it open. Dude.

[Dan Powers]

Dude, sitting in a fucking movie theater,

[Sean]

there's nothing like it.

[Dan Powers]

Eating popcorn and washing it down with a nice, crisp pop is like Sprite. That is fucking. That'll get your dick hard.

[Sean]

Sometimes I wonder legitimately what is wrong with me when. With the. With the ferocity that I eat popcorn.

[Dan Powers]

I know it's crazy. And, dude, I'll tell you, because, like, if you do it at home, it's not the same thing. And I'll also tell you this. There's nothing like the experience of sitting there holding your popcorn and taking a big mouthful and going, a bunch of it spills all over the place, but it's dark, so no one can see it. And you've just finished a trailer and you look at your friend and go, that looks good.

[Sean]

I feel like that's every.

[Dan Powers]

Everyone does be going.

[Chris]

Experiences you. At the. The moment the trailer finishes, you give your one sentence review of what that movie's gonna be like, where it's like, that's gonna be trash.

[Sean]

I will eat. If I'm eating at home or, like, anywhere else, you know, you're kind of gently eating a snack. I literally scoop a fistful card, and I eat it so fast. And the ones that are trying to spill down, I'm like, this.

[Dan Powers]

They're like, I like. You literally pin it to your face.

[Chris]

Not to interrupt, you guys, but this trend, while it's on the table, this trend of popcorn buckets being the least convenient way to eat anything.

[Sean]

Imagine open that.

[Dan Powers]

There's literally popcorn in here.

[Sean]

Imagine opening.

[Dan Powers]

I just opened the Trojan horse.

[Sean]

Popcorn.

[Dan Powers]

I'm eating popcorn.

[Chris]

But, like, you're. Everyone's in the theater feeding from the belly of the horse.

[Dan Powers]

I'm eating. I'm eating Greek soldiers right now.

[Chris]

Yeah.

[Dan Powers]

It is absolutely hysterical that this has become a trend. And there's nothing funnier than the ones that are so phallic or. Yeah, sex driven, which has to be

[Chris]

by design at this.

[Dan Powers]

Absolutely. Like the Dune one, the sandworm. It's like, reach into Shiloh.

[Chris]

Supergirl.

[Sean]

Supergirl 1.

[Chris]

Have you seen that?

[Sean]

No, which one was that?

[Chris]

Let me pull it up for you guys. You guys Will like this.

[Dan Powers]

There is no human. There's no human experience that is more relatable to a labrador retriever than eating popcorn at a movie theater. Dan, you are absolutely kidding me. That looks like a cock.

[Sean]

What is that?

[Dan Powers]

Is that supposed to be her cape?

[Chris]

It's supposed to be like her torso with a trench coat around it, but it looks a little different.

[Dan Powers]

Oh, it's like her. What does she wear, like a raincoat in that movie?

[Chris]

It's like a raincoat or something.

[Sean]

That is.

[Dan Powers]

Hey, guys. That looks like a penis.

[Sean]

Yeah, a veiny, triumphant.

[Dan Powers]

That looks like an uncircumcised penis.

[Chris]

Hang on. There was. People were taking, like, pictures in the movie theaters where it looked like dick pics. There we go with this guy right here.

[Sean]

That is crazy.

[Dan Powers]

That is ridiculous.

[Chris]

Has to be by design.

[Sean]

Yeah, yeah. But anyway. Yeah, I will shove the popcorn in my mouth so fast, and my next act as I get the last one of my mouth is just. I'm just grabbing a new club, dude.

[Chris]

It's good that they give it in a rigid bucket.

[Dan Powers]

Yeah.

[Chris]

It's like. I know it feels like you're eating from a trough because you see people coming in, like, wheelbarrows worth of food.

[Dan Powers]

You do that, but, like, you gotta

[Chris]

put it underneath where it's gonna fall into.

[Dan Powers]

Yeah, you're literally a pig in a farm. Yeah, you gotta. I love when you do the dad shake too. Yeah, like, you get in your hand,

[Sean]

you kind of like, move it down there. Yeah, yeah.

[Dan Powers]

You know, it's great.

[Sean]

Okay, that's one.

[Dan Powers]

Yep.

[Chris]

All right.

[Sean]

And this is three. And I think I'm gonna be happy about it. Sean, peanut butter m and Ms. Amazing

[Dan Powers]

Dan, were you actually gonna do that?

[Chris]

I. I'm looking at a picture of movie theater Dan.

[Sean]

I was. I was ready for the.

[Dan Powers]

Wait, wait, he just said peanut butter m's. Yeah.

[Sean]

Yeah, we're thrilled.

[Dan Powers]

This is the best list we've ever done.

[Sean]

We did it.

[Dan Powers]

Yeah.

[Sean]

And I was waiting for the Reese's pieces, which I would have at three at the movie theater.

[Dan Powers]

Brother, those things are so.

[Chris]

I was piece of on the list, but my problem is that, like, depending on how many of them I'm eating, I either love them or hate them.

[Dan Powers]

Oh, yeah, Reese's pieces do hit a if you can't eat a full box. So, like, here's the thing. My go to movie snack is raisinets, and I will. I will not hear a word from anybody.

[Chris]

Really? I didn't put them on the list because I thought you'd hate Them.

[Dan Powers]

I love Raisinets. No, you don't think that.

[Sean]

Well, they're just not. They're like, whatever. They're.

[Dan Powers]

The Raisinets are phenomenal. The milk chocolate on Raisinets is so, so delicious and smooth. It's like a really high quality chocolate.

[Sean]

Yeah.

[Dan Powers]

And it's made with real fruit. It's incredible.

[Chris]

And therefore it's healthy.

[Dan Powers]

Yes. I love Raisinets. And I will gas an entire box of Raisinets by myself. I did it on Sunday. If you go through an entire box of Reese's Pieces, you do kind of hit a point where you're like, I feel pretty shitty right now.

[Chris]

You know what I love about. Of all the things I love about America, one of my favorites is that when you go to a movie theater and you get your large popcorn and they give you a refill of your large popcorn for free.

[Sean]

Oh, yeah.

[Chris]

So you spend your bazillion dollars on it. You consume the entire thing before the trailers are even finished. And you just walk back and they give you a whole nother.

[Sean]

I'll do another.

[Chris]

And it's like an inhuman amount of food to consume.

[Sean]

But I love it. Sean. I will sometimes get. They'll hand me the large because I'm like, with Sandra or something. And I'm like, I'll do a large because we might, you know, chug through the small. Yeah. And then they'll hand it to me, and I will look at it and laugh and go, in what universe could the two of us eat this much popcorn?

[Dan Powers]

Yeah.

[Sean]

And then before the trailers end, I'm like this scraping the bottom of the bucket.

[Dan Powers]

It is a pretty primal feeling when your fingertips feel the bottom of the bucket.

[Chris]

And it's like an open secret that you can just ask them for a second box and then just, like, get a large for you and your buddy. So you can both have a large popcorn for the price of one.

[Sean]

Yeah.

[Dan Powers]

Sean, what is your. What is your. And I promise, folks, we'll end this episode here, but I actually bet people are having a great time. What is your go to movie theater? Candy.

[Chris]

Well, popcorn's almost mandatory, but I do really, really like peanut M M's.

[Sean]

Yeah, I'm pop popcorn. Sour Patch Kids. Literally every time. I don't think I've ever entered a movie.

[Dan Powers]

You know what I really, really like that, I think is, like, an old timer candy. Am I an old man? Maybe. You ever had snow caps?

[Sean]

Oh, they're incredible.

[Chris]

No, but that sounds like a Depression era.

[Dan Powers]

Yeah, it's definitely a World War II rationed.

[Sean]

Yeah, man.

[Dan Powers]

I think snow caps are really good. And like nonparelli sprinkles on there.

[Sean]

Yeah, it's amazing.

[Dan Powers]

Give it a look. Do you know what I'm talking about?

[Chris]

No idea.

[Dan Powers]

Give it a quick look up. Snow caps candy. They're really delightful.

[Chris]

Oh, those look really good.

[Dan Powers]

They're great. They're great.

[Sean]

They are wonderful.

[Dan Powers]

And you know what? So are Raisinets. Guys, this has been one of the most fun episodes I've ever been a part of.

[Sean]

I loved every second.

[Dan Powers]

It was delightful and I hope you all did too. At home. We've got a ton of fun stuff coming for you folks next week. We've got great interviews. Alex Ovechkin interview is coming. We got Eric Johnson coming on the show. We've got tons more Caps players. Islanders players are going to be a really fun time. Can't wait for you to see it. And then do not forget, next week we are launching Sci Fi section. Could not be more fired up about it. We are going to be deep diving into one of our favorite sci fi series, Red Rising. First episode comes out next Wednesday. Do not miss it.

[Sean]

I could not be more fired up. And until then, skate hard.