Resilience and Networking: Bek Lover's Journey from Finance to Podcasting Success

Summary

Episode Summary: Resilience and Networking: Beck Lover's Journey from Finance to Podcasting Success

Escaping the Drift with John Gafford delves deep into the transformative journey of Beck Lover, a multifaceted individual who transitioned from the high-stakes world of finance to becoming a successful podcaster. This episode, released on February 12, 2025, offers listeners an intimate look into Beck's resilience, networking prowess, and his mission to inspire others to overcome adversity.

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1. Introduction and Guest Background

John Gafford warmly welcomes Beck Lover to the studio, highlighting Beck's legendary status in New York City's nightlife scene. Beck's impressive network and his ability to navigate and monetize his connections are emphasized as key elements of his success.

Notable Quote:

"This is a dude that cut his teeth and became... a legend in the nightlife scene in New York City."
[02:29]

2. Beck's Personal Struggles and Resilience

Beck opens up about the profound loss of his uncle in 2013, a figure he describes as the "king of nightlife." This tragedy was a turning point, propelling him from the tumultuous nightlife environment to a path of personal growth and purpose.

Notable Quotes:

"And I think some of that's embedded in our DNA as Albanian Americans were very pro-American... because America actually saved Albania."
[04:18]

"The first thing I did when I lost my brother was never drink again... if I drank with a broken heart, I'm a dead man."
[48:42]

3. The Power of Networking

A significant portion of the conversation centers on the importance of networking. Beck shares his strategies for building and maintaining a robust network, especially highlighting the value of offering genuine support rather than seeking immediate gains.

Notable Quotes:

"If you're young, you don't realize it because in their minds, they think like, well, what can I offer?"
[31:06]

"You should be talking to everybody... Your network can change your life in seconds."
[31:06]

4. Transition to Podcasting

Beck recounts his humble beginnings in podcasting, starting with minimal listeners and resources. The turning point came with influential guests like Arthur Nascarella and heartfelt stories from listeners, which fueled the podcast’s growth. Today, his podcast boasts over 10 million views, inspiring countless individuals to persevere through their own challenges.

Notable Quotes:

"The reason I started my podcast... is to inspire people, literally to not give up."
[53:06]

"If I save one... I was like, I'm not going. I'm not giving up."
[55:16]

5. Insights on Society and Adversity

Beck and John discuss the current societal divisions and leadership challenges in America. They express concerns over political polarization and the fragility of societal structures, emphasizing the need for unity and resilience.

Notable Quotes:

"Second, third, fourth, fifth generation Americans do not realize the gift and the opportunity that they have."
[07:00]

"We're sitting here on the precipice of one of the most critical, most dangerous times literally in American history."
[07:57]

6. The Impact of Social Media and Personal Accountability

The conversation shifts to the influence of social media on young generations, highlighting both its potential for connection and its pitfalls, such as fostering superficial relationships and increasing feelings of inadequacy.

Notable Quotes:

"This is why they're the Easter Bunny Generation. They are so beautiful because during Easter... The eggs, they're hollow. That's why I call them the Easter Bunny Generation."
[65:16]

"You need to focus on what you're doing day by day, man. Don't worry about the noise."
[65:40]

7. Building a Legacy and Giving Back

Beck emphasizes the importance of using one's platform to create positive change. He shares his aspirations to support others in dire situations, demonstrating his commitment to making a meaningful impact beyond personal success.

Notable Quotes:

"People can call and say, hey, man, when you lose something that you can't replace."
[44:42]

"Silk, I'm coming for you. I promise you... You need to face your demons."
[55:13]

8. Lessons on Purpose and Happiness

The episode concludes with profound reflections on finding one's true purpose and the essence of happiness. Beck advocates for pursuing passions that align with one's intrinsic values, rather than conforming to societal expectations.

Notable Quotes:

"The key, in my opinion, is to figure out what you really want to do."
[62:46]

"Everyone always told me, man, you have such a way of speaking. You inspire me."
[63:53]

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Key Takeaways

• Resilience is Crucial: Overcoming personal tragedies can lead to profound personal growth and a newfound sense of purpose.

• Effective Networking: Building genuine, supportive relationships can open doors and create opportunities that propel one’s career and personal life.

• Pursue Passion Over Convenience: Aligning one’s career with personal passions leads to greater fulfillment and happiness than merely chasing financial success.

• Positive Impact Matters: Using one's platform to inspire and support others can create lasting, meaningful change both personally and within the community.

• Mindful Consumption: Being conscious of the content one consumes and its impact on mental health is essential in the age of social media.

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Conclusion

Beck Lover’s journey from the frenetic nightlife of New York City to a celebrated podcaster underscores the power of resilience and the importance of building meaningful connections. His story serves as a beacon of hope for listeners feeling adrift, demonstrating that with determination and the right network, remarkable success and personal fulfillment are attainable.

For more insights and to follow Beck Lover's endeavors, visit becklover.com or tune into the Beck Lover Podcast available on all major platforms.

Transcript

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[B]

If you're up against adversity, there is it just takes like you heard how quickly this dude's life turned around.

[A]

Never give up.

[B]

It could turn around for you in his Basie voice. Never give up.

[A]

Never surrender.

[B]

Never surrender.

[A]

We will not go silently into the night.

[B]

And now esc the Drift, the show designed to get you from where you are to where you want to be. I'm John Gafford and I have a knack for getting extraordinary achievers to drop their secrets to help you on a path to greatness. So stop drifting along. Escape the drift. And it's time to start right now. Welcome back to the program, everybody. Today in the studio, man, I got a banger for you. This is a dude that cut his teeth and became. I mean, impresario. Is that. Is that a word we want to use? I mean, this is a dude that became a legend in the nightlife scene in New York City. And just literally through that avenue just. I mean, knows everybody on Earth. It's crazy. As I'm flipping through his face, I was flipping through his Instagram before he came on. I'm like, yep. No, that dude. That. That dude. Oh, there's Ted Donnick. He's at a dinner at Craig's. Oh, yeah. Okay. Yeah, no, that's. I mean, those. Everybody knows everybody. And his ability to network and use that can only be dwarfed in reality by his ability to overcome some serious adversities at his life. So if you're somebody that is dealing with some issues, this dude's going to inspire you. If you're somebody that wants to understand how to grow your network and monetize that thing at the next level, this is the podcast for you today. Ladies and gentlemen, welcome to studio. This is Beck. Lover back. What's up, dude?

[A]

What's going on, brother? It's good to be out here in Vegas. Super bowl weekend.

[B]

Yeah, man.

[A]

Nice to meet you. Beautiful office, man.

[B]

Thank you. I appreciate that.

[A]

Nice operation. Nice studio, man. I can tell you you're serious about this. Not some rinky dink podcast or how I started. No, the back of a room somewhere with you. Look at my first episodes. You're like. But see, people don't understand that, like, you got to take risks in life.

[B]

What's. Yeah, what's. So you have the podcast, so we're going to get to all the backstory stuff in a second. So your podcast too. Did you start it for the same reason I did? Just to kind of build your network?

[A]

No.

[B]

No. Why'd you start your podcast?

[A]

I went through a very difficult time. I lost what I call my brother. You know, some people like to troll as sad. It's usually people that actually know me and know my. What I call my brother is my mom's brother. It was my uncle. He was 10 years older than me. If I was the prince of nightlife, he was the king of nightlife, and I lost him in 2013. And even though I'd been through many horrible things in my life, right? Like, I'm a First generation Albanian American, right? So I was born in the U.S. my family, you know, fought against communism in Albania. And it was the most isolated country in all of. Not just Europe, the world at one point, worse than North Korea today. No one was ever allowed in or out. You would have never had Dennis Rodman playing basketball like he went to North Korea, or my friend Wally Green, who went to play ping pong on an exhibition tour. Fascinating person. No one was allowed in or out for 50 years. My grandfather and my great grandfather, God rest his soul, fought to the last bullet. They didn't have no reinforcements, no nothing. You know, the communists were supplied by the Soviets and you know, the, you know, the Iron Curtain. And unfortunately, my people were isolated from the world for a very long time. We have a very tragic history, our people. And I think some of that's in, embedded in our DNA as Albanian Americans were very pro American, and that's before communism took over, because America actually saved Albania.

[B]

I got, I got to tell you. So my grandparents actually moved here from Hungary, from Budapest in the 40s, right? My mother, first generation American. Same thing. And Americans that don't take for granted what we have in this country, right?

[A]

It's, it's disgusting.

[B]

So a couple of years ago, we went to Budapest. We happen to be there. To me, Budapest, the most beautiful city.

[A]

It's gorgeous.

[B]

I love it. It's gorgeous, right? So we're there and we happen to be there for Hungarian Independence Day. And I'm like, oh, sweet. This is going to be great, right? We'll eat hot dogs, there'll be celebrations and all this stuff. Dude, no, it was a million people walking down, which is essentially their champs to laze, right? Walking to what's. What's Hero Square and dead silence, like. And then you realize these people haven't been free that long, right? So when you walk by, they call it the Museum of Horrors, where the Nazis occupied it and then the communists occupied it, like, and like, like, yeah, my uncle got killed in, right? Not like 200, 300 years. Some generational thing. It's like, dude, this happened when I was a kid and I can remember this. And I think you're right. I think people that have that frame of reference have a different understanding and love for this country.

[A]

Second, third, fourth, fifth generation Americans do not realize the gift and the opportunity that they have. More importantly, they're falling into these traps of division which have galvanized both the left and the right. And if we take the people out of it and just focus on the leaders of both sides and our country here in America, both have harmed this nation. One side started war after war after war. The other ones continued, though they didn't stop it either. Right. They continued financing these conflicts all around the world that were not beneficial to the American people at all. As someone that walked out of underneath the World Trade Center Plaza on the day it was attacked and saw those buildings collapse in front of his eyes, and then told by George Bush Jr. We're gonna take out the Taliban. Here we are, 24 years later, they're back in power, armed more than ever.

[B]

We've been paying them with our guns.

[A]

Paying them billions of dollars. Forget just the arms that we left the billions of dollars so people on the right could say what was the right that started that side. And again, I lean towards the right.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

And then the left pushing ideology. That's just against simple common sense. Focusing on one microscope of this entire nation, which is that community that has like 50 different letters. Yeah. And putting everyone into echo chambers and then saying, this side is going to destroy this side and that side is going to destroy this side. And divided our nation in half. Both sides are guilty for that. And we are here, sitting here on the precipice of one of the most critical, most dangerous times literally in American history, where I've sensed that this, literally this nation could, could have erupted into open conflict like what you saw in Yugoslavia, which you've seen in other places where society collapses. Like, people don't realize how fragile society is until it's not anymore. And that's what's scary as a first generation American, as someone, I swear to God, was so proud to be American, man. Like, when I would go to Europe, I would hold my head up high. And now I'm ashamed, bro. I'm embarrassed. Not because of my fellow brothers and sisters, but because of these leaders that have used our name, have used our goodwill, have used our sweat to do things that not only hurt the world, but have hurt us as Americans. And we need to wake up, man. It's like every four years we have the choice between Coke or Pepsi and we're diabetic.

[B]

Well, you know, I think you got water sitting in the White House right now with, with what's going on. Musk and Doge.

[A]

Yeah, I, I, I listen, I like a lot of what they're doing. I like a lot of what they're doing. I'm just talking in general up until this point where we are today.

[B]

I, I, I agree, but I think it's getting harder for, for Some of these, like, for example, this morning, and I never. Dude, I almost never talk politics on the show, but this morning, I saw something that was so, so insane to me, that was crazy, which was on all the news channels this morning. You had Maxine Walters and some other Democratic representative standing outside the Department of Education, like, demanding to get in as some kind of weird protest to the doge. But my thing was, like, what are you gonna do if they let you in? Like, what? Like, this is all just a dog and pony show. And it's getting to be such a ridiculous dog and pony show. Cause I don't know anybody in America. Like, I literally don't know anybody that I know on both sides of the aisle that is not seeing. Obviously, my friends on the left are a little quieter about some of it, but I know anybody that's seeing some of the cuts they're making and some of this insane stuff that's been getting spent, they can go, well, you know what? Wait a second. I think that might have been a good idea. We need to send that money out of here. Like. Like you from being from Albania. Let me ask you this, because this is a good question for you. Seeing. Seeing what an impoverished country, or knowing what an impoverished country can be, like.

[A]

The poorest country in Europe.

[B]

So now that you're.

[A]

At one point.

[B]

So this is a great question for you, because now you're. Now you're. You love America. It's great American citizen, but you know how the world is. It is my opinion, and this is just my opinion. And again, my frame of reference is born, raised, lived here, everything else. That we should not send $1 to any other country on this planet until every single veteran in this country is taken care of.

[A]

I fully agree, number one. And number two, until we pay off our debt.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

On top of that. But I have family that served in Iraq. Shout out to Brian. Okay? He's like my brother Brian from Dallas. Two tours in Fallujah. Albanian American, born and raised. Right. We're very proud to be a part of American society, but we're not proud of the last 20 years, man. We're not. I'm ashamed, bro. We're worried about some of the most ridiculous things right now. You know, why are we worried about half? I'm not saying that a minority should not be heard or have rights. I might even, like, I believe, because we guarantee everyone the right to pursue happiness or whatever. That's great. And private matters, like your private parts and what you want to do with them should be a private Matter. Why are you pushing this on children? People like Gavin Newsom. I'll call him out all day. You're worried about children in California chopping off their wee wee. Don't you worry about skid row? Why don't you worry about all the homeless? Why don't you worry about the fires? Why don't you worry about having water in your hydrants? There's no excuse for that. The most taxed state. California is the most beautiful state in our nation. It's run like garbage. My heart aches for these people, but if they're going to keep electing that, I don't feel bad for them. I got to sit there and say, I really don't feel bad for you guys at all. Zero.

[B]

Well, the megaphone gets louder the further out from the middle it gets.

[A]

But this is a person who shut your businesses down in 2019, who sat there and looked in the cameras and said, we were outdoors. While he kept people out of business, while big box stores could stay in business. They ravaged our lives. The truth is out of the bag. Even the CIA is confirmed. Yes. So all of us crazy people that wear tinfoil hats, we're not looking so crazy. But you're looking really stupid right now.

[B]

No, I think.

[A]

I think those of you that just can't wake up, wake up.

[B]

But I think the reason that he's getting elected is because the ideology of social importance, social matters like you discussed, is so embedded. So embedded. They sell a young age to their. To the people that live there. That. That's more important than the practical sense. Practicality.

[A]

That's exactly what they do. They're. They're hitting an emotional point, which is a sales tactic. Right?

[B]

Sure.

[A]

Because emotion will override logic. 9 out of 10 times. That's for certain personality types a lot. When you. But the key is when you can find that emotional bunk is when you're with a client who shows no emotion. The master will find. Because everyone has a button, brother. Everyone has a button. Whether you have a driver in the seat that you're trying to pitch or whatever. You got to find that. And that. That's always been my strategy. I always believe the sales made in the warm up, bro. It's not in the presentation, it's not in the process, not the product at all. It's never the product, in my opinion. It's never the product. It's finding what makes this person tick. And how can I attach that to this product?

[B]

Well, there's a very different. Well, how do you think. What do you Think about this and how do you feel about this? Are two different questions. And you got to know when to play those cards based on who you're talking.

[A]

And if you do it wrong, you're going to have a very, very angry customer.

[B]

Yeah. You ask a super analytical client, how do you feel about this? Like, I don't care. I feel about the numbers. Tell me it's.

[A]

You're going to have a very angry customer.

[B]

Yeah. I was in a bar, I was in a meeting the other day and somebody asked me how I felt about something. I said, it doesn't matter how I feel. The market tells me it sucks. That's exactly what I said. The market is telling me this sucks. It's not any good. Like.

[A]

And the price you're asking is absurd.

[B]

Yeah, it doesn't matter how I feel.

[A]

I'm in the process of liquidating a property in a, you know, in a very, very, you know, high desirable area. And, you know, I think my price is very fair, but it's not moving. So where am I have to drop the price, man.

[B]

Yeah, dude, that's. Listen, that's what we talk about every time, Every time I tell anybody go into listing presentation over real estate, I would say the same thing. Never marry yourself as an agent to the price. Never do that. Right. You've got to explain to people that this is how the markets work. If we put it on the market, as long as an agent does their job and exposes it worldwide with high quality marketing, the pictures look great, images look great. 360 tour. All the things, all the things you're supposed to do. If nobody shows up, you're 10% off. If people show up but nobody writes an offer, you're 5 to 7%.

[A]

What about if you get three offers but they fall through an attorney review? Because either a, they didn't get financing. Should you stay at that price? So if I got three offers at, let's say 1.5, stay where you are. And it's only been publicly on the market for a week.

[B]

Be patient. Yes. Stay where you are.

[A]

Don't move it because he dropped and you look desperate.

[B]

No, no, don't move it. Leave where you are.

[A]

So two offers, offers were made privately.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

That they fell through. One, that attorney spooked them. I mean it was full disclosure. But you, you said yes, and now you worried about your attorney, says it was a rent control property. There was nothing hidden from the, from the prospective client. Is like, hey, this is rent control. But there's some ways you can maneuver and do what you got to do. The right landlord is what they do. I did the same thing when I brought the property.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

My rents were $800 for a two bedroom in North New Jersey. You understand?

[B]

I love how there's no New York exit at all until you start talking about rent control prices.

[A]

And I got them out. Bam, there it is, them all out. Legally, I got them out. And then guess what? I renovated it, increased the rent by 50%. The new owner can do the same thing. Like these people don't have vision or they're trying to lowball, you know. It's an investment property. It's not a place I live in with living.

[B]

But if you got three offers in in the first week, bro, stay the course.

[A]

Yeah, I think, I think we're under priced, but I think because of mortgage rates and how high they went, I should be getting much more. In my opinion, it's a four family brother.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

With two bonus units in the back.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

That are not legal. But there's ways you can do things.

[B]

Listen to the market, my man. If you're getting offers, the market's telling you you're right where you need to be. And as long as you got room.

[A]

To work, you've been in real estate.

[B]

Do this for 20 years.

[A]

I got in and out when I was young. That's how I actually started my career in sales.

[B]

I started, you know what's funny, man?

[A]

In commercial leasing in midtown Manhattan. I had no idea what I was doing. I was terrified.

[B]

I was in the nightclub business.

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[A]

Now here in, in.

[B]

No, no, no, no. This was in. This was in Atlanta, actually. I was. Remember Super Bowl 2000 in Atlanta where Ray Lewis got in that trouble? Yeah, that was my club. Yeah. Cobalt Lounge. And anyway, I refresh our memory on that.

[A]

What happened there?

[B]

Yeah, we. So we had that week Super Bowls in Atlanta. We had the NFL pro player party. We had the Playboy party. We had the Maxim party. We had everything. Esquire magazine said we were the number one club on the east Coast. United States poll to poll Miami to New York. They said Cobalt Lounge was the number one.

[A]

Yeah, it was banging.

[B]

We were doing incredibly well. By 2. By 2000, by 1999. 2000 steps. I mean this is before heavy bottle service and all.

[A]

Yeah, that's right. When we took off. Because even in New York City, it, it, it changed. It was massive nightclubs like Sound Factory, Limelight Tunnel. Yeah, and then they all went down. When Giuliani did his crackdown and cleaned up New York and. And Peter Gation was exiled to Canada.

[B]

No. Came to Atlanta and opened Limelight in Atlanta.

[A]

I know, but he was forced out of America at one point completely. He was allowed to come back in. And then it went to the lounge error, which was Instead of having 2000 people in the club, you had 2, 300 people. But they got to pay their rent. Right. So that's one bottle service. And also the drugs change. Right. People were doing ecstasy where you wouldn't mix it with alcohol. So if you go look at the videos of nightlife back then, that's why they charged you 100 to get in.

[B]

Yep.

[A]

And you'd pop your pill and stay up for three days dancing and drinking water and hopefully you don't fall into a K hole. I thank God, never got involved in narcotics. That's why I lasted as long as I did in nightlife. I did used to drink and I was a pretty heavy drinker.

[B]

Let's. Okay, let's talk about nightlife because let's get back to that because we've kind of been all over the board a little bit. It's all right.

[A]

Scattered brain.

[B]

Well, here's the thing, dude. You. You notice on the desk if you've ever watched this, I have no list of questions. We just have a conversation. So it's just like I met you at a bar over time.

[A]

They're here, they're watching, they're with us. Yeah, exactly.

[B]

Because I think that's just more. I think that's better a better convers conversations do it this way than if I.

[A]

The way I've done. I think it's just more organic and it's. It's not forced, man.

[B]

It is, it is. So tell me about your nightlight, how you got it in nightlife.

[A]

So I started going out when I was 17. And the first nightclub I ever went into that I remember was Exit, man. This place was. Today it's called Terminal 5. They do concerts in there. I mean, this place was massive. And this is when you had like, you know, The New York DJs were like local celebrities, man. You had people like Jonathan Peters, you know, you had. There's just so many of them, my brain's a little fried right now. I'm trying to wake up.

[B]

No, you're good.

[A]

What's his face? I want to give him a shout out because I know he follows me too. He's huge. Whatever. You had all these amazing DJs, right? And in those days, people would walk into a night.

[B]

What year is this?

[A]

We're talking the mid to late 90s. But I started going out in the late 90s. I caught the end of the mega club era in New York City.

[B]

So the end of Tunnel, the end of Limelight.

[A]

Exactly, I caught that end. So I got to see these places. Sound factory was crazy.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

So, you know, you would walk In Friday and literally come out Monday. It was insane. And people would just dance. It was all about dancing. And it was very organic. It was, you know, brother to be the Italians, the Albanians, the Russians, the Jew. Everyone was in there, man. You know, you had, you know, alternate lifestyle people, Right. You had the lgbt, if that's what they called them back then. They were in there yet. The club kids and the cause, like, what I loved about it, man, it was like, it was the only environment at that time where everyone got along. Yeah, right.

[B]

That was the progressive trance days.

[A]

You'd have straight people dancing next to gay. Like, everyone just was there for the music, for the art. It was very organic, man. And it was addictive, you know, to you. Just felt like you were a part of this special family. And the only thing that would change throughout the week, you would pretty much see the same people. It would just be the venue.

[B]

So you were just going out or were you promoting Door? What were you doing?

[A]

I didn't really promote in the beginning. I was more of a socialite, man. My brother was the king, man. Nikki, God rest his soul. So, you know, we went out and then I start college in the city. I went to Pace University. I'm a college kid. New York City. I don't have a campus, but New York City is my campus.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

So I start going out. He takes me to a very famous lounge called Lot 61. And Lot 61 was on 21st street in the west side terminal now. No, that was Exit, Exit. This is now when the lounge era begins. Okay, so Amy Sacco, who's a legend, she actually had a place, I think, out out here, too, in Colorado. She had a place too, but she was the queen of nightlife. And she opens up this lounge called Lot 61. And then she also opened a very famous place called Bungalow 8, which was mentioned in many songs of hip hop. If you listen to the infamous Diddy, Monday night we go to Bungalow 8. That's in one of his songs. When they're singing about New York and nightlife. I said, and I actually met Diddy at Lot 61. He had released an album called We Invented the Remix. And it was also Busta Rhymes birthday. And this is when Busta Rhymes had his ponytail from his head all the way down to his ankles. And actually, coincidentally, the reason I ended up meeting him was this girl I knew was working for Jacob the Jeweler before. He was, like, really famous. Yeah, like, really, really famous. Like, where he was like a household name. And she was like, hey, it's Tuesday. Like, I need. I heard you have juice at last 61. Because it was impossible to get in that place. And the manager was Albanian. Shout out, Ben Noka. Shout out, Ben. Shout out, Mateus. Shout out, mateus.

[B]

Is it racist? Like, I. I. Because I'm a white dude with Hungarian roots, I can't get in, but the Albanians look out for.

[A]

Well, I mean, listen, you wouldn't if you didn't have discriminated.

[B]

I need DEI initiatives laid out at these clubs.

[A]

They give them preference. So we get to the front of this club, brother, and she's like, please, you got to get me in. I work for this guy named Jacob, and I got to hand out his cards, and so we go. I get to the door. You can't see the door, bro. Like, I'd never seen a place like that. It was, like, completely, like every rapper on earth at that time. And this is, like, in my. In my opinion, the heyday of hip hop, like, when it became, like, real mainstream, right? And I walk in there. I'm the only white boy in there with a suit, and every rapper I ever. And this is before, like, Google. I couldn't, like, Google how someone looked or didn't look or whatever, you know? And I'm sitting next to Black Rob, God rest his soul, the guy that had the song, like, whoa. Like, remember that song, dude?

[B]

I'm laughing at this because when you're done, I live the same story.

[A]

I don't have a lot of money. I'm a college student. I just got a credit card. I max the credit card out. I buy champagne. I buy. This Champagne was only $80 a bottle for Moet today. I cannot believe some clubs in New York charge $800 for a regular. Not a magnum, a regular bottle of Moet.

[B]

I mean, that was Cristal pricing back in the day.

[A]

And that's what they were drinking back then. You never even hear Cristal anymore, right?

[B]

It's done Crystal.

[A]

I don drink in over a decade, but it switched to tequila now, which is because in our day, it was vodka, right? Everyone was pushing the vodka and hypnotic and all those crazy, weird drinks. Make the story short, brother, because we have a lot to talk about. Puffy's dancing on the table. Everyone's in there, Buster. Every one of them other. And I'm. I see this guy, Black Rob. I didn't know how he looked. I knew his song because it wasn't like I could just Google. This is before, you know, smartphones and Puffy's dancing, and he's like, you see that mother effort? I'm like, yeah. He's like, I hate that mother effort. I'm like, what do you mean, so I can't make no money because of that mother. Those were his exact words, bro. He just passed away, I think, like, a year and a half ago. Irv Gardi just died. I used to play basketball with Irv Gotti. I think it was on Thursdays. They would go to Chelsea Pierce. This is when Murder, Inc. Was huge, which Ashante and Ja Rule, and I used to go there with a guy named Murder Murphy, who's now down in Miami. He seems to be friends with a lot of these big streamers now. He was briefly managing Tekashi. I haven't seen him in over 20 something years. He was actually shot in front of me.

[B]

Oh, geez.

[A]

That. That was when I was like, you know what? I think I'm done.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Hanging out with.

[B]

Hanging out with this.

[A]

With the hip hop crowd.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Us Albanians, we need to stay away from that type of stuff. So. So, yeah, man. Nightlife, Nightlife.

[B]

Well, I did. I want to tell myself.

[A]

So.

[B]

So Cobalt on Sunday nights, we had Jermaine Dupree from so. So Deaf would throw an event every Sunday night at our club. So every single rapper came to. You need water?

[A]

Yeah, go. Go ahead, brother. Keep going.

[B]

Every single rapper on the planet was through that place on Sunday nights. And so, yeah, I did the same. Had the same stuff. And all of our security guys that work there were all XD1 athletes. Huge dudes.

[A]

Unfortunately, that. That genre. It does. It does. I hate. It's because of the music, man. You don't see that type of violence in house music. You really don't.

[B]

Well, but here's the thing. It was never. We never with violence with the people that were in the club. We had a problem with violence.

[A]

People were outside as soon as they got outside. Yeah.

[B]

No, no, no, no. People that couldn't get in.

[A]

Oh, that couldn't get in.

[B]

Because we had a very. At Cobalt, we had a very. It was interesting, man. We had a very strict dress code, Right. Like, you couldn't come in wearing, like, your standard hip hop attire. Now, obviously, if Little John rolled up, we're. We're letting him in because he's a celebrity, but we're not letting his entourage in unless they're dressed. So it got to be known, right? And it was always the problem outside. But there was times when, like, I would go out with all of our security guys and they would take me to this place. Called the Gold or the Gentleman's club downtown in Atlanta. It was my first experience in, in a black strip club. Never been on one since. That's the only one I went to. But, dude, we walk in and I was the only white dude there. And it was just like, it was wild being out with us.

[A]

They were like, unicorn.

[B]

No, no, no, no. They knew me. They called me Cobalt. That's what they would call. Like, the DJ would give me a shout out, what's up? Cobalt in the house. And I was like. Because Sunday night everybody wanted to get in and it was just like, it was. So, yeah, I lived that life too. And I, I look back on it fondly, but I don't miss it.

[A]

I saw a lot of people go by the wayside in nightlife, right? So they let the excesses, you know, I lost friends who, who did heavy drugs, who drank. A lot of people died drunk driving. So for me, what really brought me in and what I loved about the nightlife, as I started to get juice, right? You know, the power to get into these places. And I'm. And I'm underage, brother. I wasn't even of legal age when I was a socialite, but I looked older. And I wore suits always. I wore suits since literally high school. And they made fun of me in high school. I was wearing a three piece suit, you know. Why do you always dress up so well? I said, because I might meet the president and I don't want to look like you. You don't know who you're going to meet today. And I was always dressed. I literally best dressed in the yearbook and voted most likely to have his own talk show. Well, I guess it came true.

[B]

Yep, there you go. Dude, you know what's funny, man? I was looking back just randomly at. I don't even know why somebody posted like my 8th grade, 9th grade yearbook or 8th grade yearbook online from my hometown. And I'm flipping through it and I got voted most accident prone and not most likely to succeed. And I'm looking back on that, I'm like, yeah, maybe need a recount on that one. 8th grade, Lake City Junior High School in Florida. Yeah, might need a recount. There it is. But let me ask you this. So you were, you were getting so connected and it's so easy to get connected now with the gram, right? Everybody does it.

[A]

This was out back then. My God.

[B]

Right? Like people don't really, like. I just wish people that were 25 right now understood what it was like to be connected in that way. Before the world of Instagram, how did you build your network? Was it all just text messages? Phone numbers?

[A]

It was all talking, man. It was not. It was all business cards. You know, back then, you couldn't even text, really. There was just trying to get someone's cell phone number and talking. So, you know, there's a couple. Couple parts to this. I think it's important. I want to teach your audience something they need to do. If you're young, you don't realize it because in their minds, they think like, well, what can I offer? I have nothing to offer these people. How do I go talk to this big shot? You know, I don't know how to network, because networking is everything. You know that. It can change everything. And the problem is, when you're young, you might be meeting some of these people and you don't know what to offer them. You don't know how to entice them. You don't have to even start a conversation with these people. And remember, these people at that level are being bombarded every five seconds.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

So the first thing is to not ask them for something. Right. What can you offer them? And very quickly. Right. Or leveraging other connections you have, because maybe you don't have something that's of interest to them, but you can figure out someone you know has something of interest to them. So the first thing is this. You should be talking to everybody. When you're under the age of 25, you are building your network. This device, your phone, has a place where you can write notes. I met Billy Bob at a bar at the Ritz Carlton Hotel in Las Vegas, Nevada. Bill has two kids named John and Gene or whatever. He's in computer chips. You're not even in that industry, but 10 years from now, you might be. And now someone goes, hey, man, I really need computer chips. Ten years from now, I need computer chips, man. I don't know. Let me see. You type in the word computer chip on your contacts. It'll pop up. Everyone in that industry now, you can call them and say, hey, man, do you make these type of chips? Now this is 10 years later. If you can store the data and have intention with what you're doing. Because every second counts. And we don't learn this until we hit our 40s. I'm like, oh, my God, what did I do? I wasted. My greatest regret in life is how much time I wasted and not having intention. But if you can't figure out what you want to do, at least you can start building your network. It doesn't mean you have to use it now. That's always going to be there if you know how to build it and cater to it. So you type in those notes. Now you're taking 10% off of a deal of someone you met 10 years ago. That is your wealth, your network can change your life in seconds. One move, one connection. So what I would always do is try to do some homework on who I'm trying to meet or target. This is a lot easier to do today. You can Google Someone in 5 seconds. You can literally read a whole synopsis of their life in seconds and then approach them and say, hey, man, you know, many times I've done that. Someone high profile, I never watched any of their crap. I Google, hey, man, I'm a big fan of boom, boom, boom. And by the way, I know you come to New York, and if you ever need anything in New York, I got this venue. They do this. He's like, actually, yeah, we throw parties. And once in a while, brother, even if you don't, you just want to send someone from your entourage. You know, it just depends who you're talking to and what might be of interest to show him. Wow, this guy's cool. He's not bothering. He's not asking me for a picture. He's offering me something, you know, And I think. And then you deliver.

[B]

I think you just. You just. The number one thing you just said was that you can offer is somebody that's 22, 23 years old. That if you're like, what can I offer? You know, I think what you had. You mentioned earlier was you had a lot of juice at the clubs in New York, so you could walk up to anybody.

[A]

I used to go out with Tracy Morgan.

[B]

Yeah. And say, where do you want to go? I can get us in anywhere in two seconds. And it's that ease of access that gets there. That costs you no money. It costs you no effort. You just have to be cool.

[A]

The club's happy that they're there. Yeah. The bottles are put on the table. I delivered. They have a good time.

[B]

They think you're there.

[A]

If we're talking about nightlife, but it doesn't have to be just nightlife, like, Right.

[B]

I know, but what I'm saying is. What I'm saying is people think they have to have something tangible that they create that brings value.

[A]

Or if you want to be in nightlife, make a lot of money. Friends that are girls. Yeah. And take them out, and you'll be paid to hang out with them. But see Which I think is a joke. I don't consider that promoting. And unfortunately that's how a lot of New York operates in Vegas and Miami. To me, that's not promoting. You're not a promoter. When I used to throw an event, 2, 3000 people would show up. I had no sub promoters. That's promoting. There's videos online. You can go look at them all day. That to me, is a promoter. Someone that brings money, my friend. At T Mobile, we'll give you four.

[B]

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[A]

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[B]

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[A]

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[B]

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[A]

If you went on a road trip.

[B]

And you didn't stop for a Big.

[A]

Mac or drop a crispy fry between the car seats or use your McDonald's bag as a placemat, then that wasn't a road trip. It was just a really long drive. Participating McDonald's. Okay, paying clubs, paying to create image tables. I'm not saying that you did this in yours. I'm saying I know for a fact that this is how the system works. They pay, you know how you know you're a promoter.

[B]

Tape is fair. Models or whatever.

[A]

It's Frank Sinatra syndrome, man. Create the whole environment because you're creating an environment to lure in the whales because you know you're gonna make it up on the whale. So if I give out 300 worth of bottles to get 100200 people to drink there. Now I'm gonna try to. I'm putting bait, I'm chumming the water to try to bing in the whale so I can bang them out for five bottles.

[B]

We had one state. We didn't do atmosphere models back then. We did have one image table. No, what we did was the girls that. All the girls that danced at the Gold Club, which was Gilar Club in Atlanta, that went down in that huge sting. But if you worked at the Gold Club, it was well known that if you came to our bar, you drank for free. Like we were. We would, we would set you up.

[A]

Whatever you want, if you can. If you. And I'm not using the word to control them, but if you can bring the women to your venue, that's all you need. You don't even. Men will go to the same place every single night if they know they have a chance to meet a beautiful.

[B]

Well, dude, that's.

[A]

That's what they're out for. They're out to drink and meet a woman and hopefully have a good ending to their night.

[B]

My very first place that I had any ownership in was when I was 20 years old. I was still a student at Florida State. And I had these guys had a bar and they didn't know what they were doing and they were going under and they just. As a hail Mary, they said, hey, come in and take it over. We'll give you a third of it. Because it was like they were going out either just fill it. Yeah, just fill it. So the first thing I did was I. They had all these girls that were working there, all these girls that were the bartenders and everything else. I got rid of all of them and I hired all my fraternity brothers that were super face men and super good looking dudes. And because those guys brought in all the girls and then the girls brought in everybody else.

[A]

It was a reverse.

[B]

Yeah, it was a reverse. But guy. But see, guys will go to a knitting school, they don't care. They'll go to a knitting class. If there's, if there's beautiful women there, they don't care.

[A]

I agree. It doesn't matter. And that's why. And a lot of these venues during that time weren't that nice. It was because all the beautiful women were going there.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

And then the celebrities want to go there and then the rich people want to go there because they have the money to spend to get in there and they don't care. They want to be in the environment. And then Page Six writes about it. And then. And that's all it really took. But as the real estate prices have increased in New York City, it's become extremely difficult to operate a successful nightclub.

[B]

Yeah, I don't know how you.

[A]

Okay. It's ridiculous, actually. And this generation, the bottle world is. I think it's finally over.

[B]

Is it going.

[A]

It's all because of the festivals. The other generation will go pound two cases of White Claws, Papa Hit a Molly, and then go to a festival at the Brooklyn Mirage.

[B]

But I think even more, I think this next generation coming up, I think you're going to see alcohol decline. Crazy. I mean, my son is 17, right? He's 17.

[A]

Alcohol is. I'm. Listen, it's going out. I think it destroys lives, brother. Let's be real. A lot of lives.

[B]

My, my. Like, but when I. By the time I was 17, dude, it was every. Every Friday, Saturday night, we were out getting after it, right? When I was 17, 18 years old. And now my son's like, nah, not for me. Not my thing.

[A]

Smart kid.

[B]

Not my thing.

[A]

He's not losing nothing.

[B]

But I don't think that doesn't mean.

[A]

You still can't go out and have fun.

[B]

I know. He's.

[A]

And it doesn't mean you still can't go to these venues. I'm always sober, and I actually have more fun now. I'm like, man, these people, you sit there and watch the show, if you know what I mean.

[B]

But I think also there's. There's other things coming out. Like the whole mushroom.

[A]

I drink coming out.

[B]

Okay. Yeah, yeah.

[A]

Kratom tea is nice.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

You know, if you get. Not this powder crap, you get the actual leaf and you make it tease. Has a very calming effect. Blue Lotus tea is awesome. And these things actually make you feel nice, but you don't lose cognition. You don't lose control of yourself. A lot of people can't handle alcohol and make fools of themselves or they hurt people. They hurt themselves, man. Alcohol, listen, you've seen it. You're a nightlife. I don't have to tell you. Fights, women, they're sloppy. They're. Man, they. You know, they wouldn't have done it if they were sober. They were entertaining another man. Then a fight breaks out. You know, stuff like that happens.

[B]

I just. I just think. Think about, like, cigarettes, right? Like, by the time my kids have kids, my. My grandkids are going to look at people that smoke cigarettes like they're out of their mind.

[A]

I'm out of my mind right now, bro. Trust me. I start I relapsed into cigarette smoking after 12 years. Ah, you go through a very stressful time. I lost £70.

[B]

Good for you.

[A]

I'm done. God willing. I'm getting very close. It's a hard habit.

[B]

It is, dude. I'm with you. I used to do the same thing.

[A]

And I love cigars. I should just go back to cigars.

[B]

Yeah. I was the same dude when I was in nightlife. I was the same thing. Smoke and smoke and smoke.

[A]

Love cigars, man.

[B]

So how did you go 12 years? Were you like the, like people used to smoke heavily?

[A]

I don't drink alcohol. Right. It's very hard to quit smoking cigarettes if you drink, but because they go to go.

[B]

Yeah, they do. But didn't you become like the worst non smoker? Like, I know I'm the guy in the casino that's like at the people next to me.

[A]

I'm like the Albanians, man. We're born in smoke.

[B]

Oh, that's true. You used to ride around in the car with the window, the windows up on a hot. On a cold day, smoking while they're.

[A]

Pregnant over there, man. Not all of them, but in the villages, you know, they don't give things. They'll light a cigarette just going, just go. Reason we got these big heads, you.

[B]

Know, I love it. All right, so obviously use that relationship and build that clout and grew that network.

[A]

So. Yeah.

[B]

I got an important question though. What makes you likable? Because we all see that guy. Everybody sees that dude in the club, that guy in the bar that everybody's gravitating to.

[A]

People can't stand me at first.

[B]

No, but what makes my question is, what gives you that swag? What's the thing?

[A]

Humor, brother.

[B]

If you had to.

[A]

Humor.

[B]

Humor. All right.

[A]

There's no quicker way, I think, in business, in relationships, if you can make some. Well, there's two ways, right? I don't recommend this to amateurs. They're gonna listen to this or make them cry. Either way, they will buy. It's learning how to use emotion and to pull it out of people also. Right. I'm not saying to manipulate, but to just be real, man. Like, if you can make someone laugh or feel your raw emotion, you know, I'm just very. I'm just very straightforward. Like, I'm just. This is who I am. I've been through some hard things in my life. I'm not a piece of crap. I am a man of my word. And I have references. I said, after a while, when you're building your network, and what's amazing, I was like, they could see who's connected to who, right? Like, I can go on someone, hey. And like, and now. And it starts to snowball. Why does, you know, why does this person follow? And it just starts snowballing, man. And then like, hey, you need a reference, Go, go talk to this person. Yeah, you need a reference, Go ask them. Go ask them what kind of social proofing. Yeah, go ask them what kind of man I'm at. Do I keep my word or not? You know, And I think it's so hard to find people like that, man, that actually keep their word, bro. It's so okay to me, those people, you don't trade them for nothing. That's why I understand all the people that lost me in their life, not even because they didn't keep their word, but backstabbing for no reason. And that's when you start to understand that there's no logic to jealousy and envy. It's a very evil emotion that there's no logic to it, you know? You know, people can be jealous of you, man. You don't even know it.

[B]

You know, the, you know, the thing that, that I kind of came to realize.

[A]

Dangerous.

[B]

The thing that came. I came to realize that will make you immune from all of that is this is. Anytime somebody does something insane or acts in a way that is nuts to me, I just remind myself I'm not the main character in their little movie, right? I'm. I'm not even the best supporting actor. I'm like a. I'm like one of those NPCs or whatever in a video game. I am irrelevant. They see things the way they do. Why am I going to let what their little movie dictate how I feel about something? I'm in my own little movie over here.

[A]

I'm talking about people, you know, people you've helped, people that are part of your life. When they ram a knife in your back, dude, I look at, listen, I could get it. Look at the same way I could get it if there's five or ten. Listen, I could understand. And I'm not saying it's right, but at least there's some logic to, hey, if I screw over back, I'm making $10 million on this.

[B]

Just.

[A]

Let's just say, right, yeah, okay. The greed got to them. Maybe they never seen that kind of money. It changes their life. Okay, cool. But to the people that all you did was help and you never hurt them, but that's your. You never betrayed them, right? I. Dude, What I'm saying is. And then they burned the bridge. Ever since, things have popped off my phone. People have been trying to get in touch with me. Haven't spoken to me in years. Why all of a sudden now you want to know me? Why? Because when you scroll left and right, you're seeing me everywhere. Hey, bud, I miss you. No, you didn't miss me. You weren't there when my brother died. You didn't call, see if I was even alive. Yeah, okay. There's people I went when their brothers died. I spent. I almost lost my job. One of my long distance cousins lost his brother tragically. I almost got fired because I. I saw how bad he was hurting. And I was never even close with him like that. I was like, you know what? He needs someone. So I call out of work. I was working for Chase bank at the time. This is 20 some years ago, four days in a row. I called out, I said, listen, you're about to lose your job. I said, well, fire me then. I don't care. It's a tragedy. I don't care. I was willing to lose my job to give emotional support to someone that's blood. Distant, but still blood. Yeah, same thing happens to me. He never even called me, man. He never even called to see how I'm doing or if I'm okay. And you know who you are if you watch this, so. But now they all want to come and hang out, bro. You know, everything has a blessing. Even the most tragic events in our life once the dust settles. Because your heart's swollen, man. And you go through these dark times in your life, right? And they will come. I don't care who you are. It's only a matter of time before you lose something that you can't replace.

[B]

Well, here's the thing. Like, you gotta. But you gotta let that go. You can keep score.

[A]

You can keep.

[B]

You can keep score.

[A]

It's hard, right, when you're traumatized. You lose someone in a car accident, unexpected brother. You weren't expecting the blow, right? It's a lot more dangerous in a fight, right? When you're not looking and you get sucker punched, right? You can get killed like that, right? So when you know something bad might happen, it's different. But when it comes unexpected, sometimes these things happen to us. We have. You know, I believe the game board of life is rigged by the creator. You couldn't control to who you were born.

[B]

No.

[A]

Or when you were born, so to say.

[B]

Wow.

[A]

I have control of everything. No. You were inserted into this Simulation that God created to test us on his terms. If I lived in Iraq or Syria, could I control the wars that broke out? I could have been the most positive person in the world. That's why I don't believe in the law of attraction, okay? I believe in positive thinking. I believe in trying to find some hope, always. I love that train of thought. But to sit here and say that we always attract everything, Some of that can be true, but not to the point where it's a universal law. You know, you gotta be careful and use the word law. If I was in Syria, I could have been the most positive person in the world.

[B]

Yeah, you're still gonna have a land.

[A]

And the war starts and I lose everything. What did I do? Or I'm in la. My house, everything burned to the ground. My family died. I didn't start that fire. I didn't attract that fire. So what I'm saying is I believe the game board is rigged. How we respond to these events, that we have no control.

[B]

But don't you.

[A]

But is our salvation is our free will.

[B]

But don't you also believe everything happens for a reason?

[A]

Which is. Do believe in divine wisdom?

[B]

Yeah, man.

[A]

Which means sometimes you don't know until looking backwards.

[B]

Yeah. I mean, you know, you talk. You talk about changing your life and we're getting. We're gentlemen of a certain age where. Where, you know, now something happened to one of us. There's. There's not gonna be a candlelight vigilant down at the schoolyard, you know, if.

[A]

Someone'S out there hurting, man, I just want them to know, like, listen when you get hit. And I didn't think things would ever get better. When I lost Nikki, I didn't think I could ever live again, man. I really didn't. Like, I. It took me years, brother. Years. Everywhere was a memory. Everywhere was a place, you know, Every song, every thick. It got so bad. I tried to move to Texas. I thought I could run away from the pain. Said, well, if I get out of New York, because this. He was the king of this city. I was just his sidekick. Maybe it won't be as bad. I almost moved to Summerlin 10 years ago, 12 years ago. Because he only died 13 years ago. And then I did go to San Antonio for three months. And I realized I have to face my demons. I can't. I'm not going to get better. It doesn't matter where I am. And it held me back, man. Now that I'm through all that, I'm looking backwards and I'M going. My greatest regret, besides losing him, is the amount of time I lost not living and making my family's life better and my life better and people's lives better. And that's why I started my podcast.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

And the name of my podcast started as the comebackteam.com. i do want to revamp it. Right now, it's the Beck Lover Podcast. Because I do daily about news, and a lot changed. But I'm relaunching that brand because I love it. And every show I interviewed, amazing people. Shout out to Tyler Sherman. He sent me some great guests. I've shared some great guests with us. And, you know, yeah, he called me one day, we got Rachel Ray on the show, and now I'm friends with Rachel Ray, man. I mean, if you would have told this to the Beck that thought life could never get better, sitting in a room, crying myself to sleep every night, bro. For years. For years, brother. People talk about bad days. I had years of darkness, but the first thing I did when I lost my brother was never drink again. Because I knew from the nightlife, if I drank with a broken heart, I'm a dead man.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

So if you got trauma in your life and you keep numbing yourself, you need to face your demons. The reason you're drinking that bottle of alcohol, the reason you're taking that drug is because you don't have the courage to turn around and face those demons. You need help now. Maybe I should have gone into therapy. I got. I'm very spiritual. I pray, brother. I prayed five times a day. I'm a Muslim, you know, by choice. And I got through that darkness because I do believe that God has designed us to overcome these things. You know, we don't need anything. He designed us to be able to handle these things. And a lot of us, because we don't have that spiritual knowledge. That's why even the 12 steps in AA, right, they talk about a higher power. It's actually a part of it. Right. So that spiritual guidance is really what got me through. Through the darkest times of my life. I don't think I'd be here if I didn't got.

[B]

I think when you lose people in life. For example, like, I wear that. Like, I just actually got this about three weeks ago. In the last couple years, I've had seven guys. Seven that I would consider my best friend at some point in my life, or good friend. Or tight circle. Yeah, Right. Either my best friend. Seven of them are now gone.

[A]

And it's crazy.

[B]

Yeah. So I got this Memento Mori was. I'm super into stoicism. Love that. And every time I don't want to do something or I do want to do something, I grab this and I think to myself, holy shit, any one of these dudes would give anything to do this thing that I don't want to go do. And it gets me off my ass.

[A]

And I go do it every day.

[B]

Or if there's something that's maybe out there that maybe I want to do that other people are going to look at and go, man, that's a little like, what are you doing? That's a little screwy. I'm like, you know what, dude? These guys would give anything to do, so I'm going to do it anyway, regardless of what he thinks. I don't give a.

[A]

When I started the podcast, okay, I never went to school. I wish I would. You never know what you want to do when you're in college, right? I majored in finance and did the whole banking thing.

[B]

Look around. You can find cars like these on autotrader. New cars, used cars, electric cars, maybe even flying cars. Okay, no flying cars. But as soon as they get invented, they'll be on Auto Trader. Just you wait. Auto Trader, huddle up. It's me, Angel Reese.

[A]

You can't beat the Cold Skin burger and fries, right? Know what else you can't beat? The Angel Reese special.

[B]

Let's break it down. My favorite barbecue sauce, American cheese, crispy bacon, pickles, onions, and a sesame seed bun, of course.

[A]

And don't forget the fries and the drink.

[B]

It's gonna be a high C for me.

[A]

Sound good?

[B]

All you have to do to get.

[A]

It is beat me in a one on one.

[B]

I'm just playing get the Angel Reef Special at McDonald's now. Ba da ba ba ba. I participate in restaurants for a limited time.

[A]

Never liked it. Why was it? And my whole life, everyone's telling me, what are you doing, man? You belong in front of a camera. People love you. You. You uplift. People just on the street, strangers. Like, I always have done this my whole life, is try to inspire people, literally to not give up. And it was crazy for me. I guess I had to go through the point where I felt like giving up, man. Because once you go through that, man, that darkness, you're a different person on the other side, man. It's crazy. So taking that pain and channeling it into the comeback team. There was no money coming in. If you look at the first few episodes, horrible. Okay? And here we are five years later. Billions of views. And I'm not saying it to be arrogant, because even the people closest to me made fun of me. You're old, man now. What do you do? You have a midlife crisis. You and your stupid podcast, Right? You look like an idiot. Right? And here I am now, brother, just on the last day. Over 10 million views, bro. It's crazy. And I'm talking across all platforms. I'm getting stopped. There's Jules. You can ask. I'm getting stopped everywhere I go. It's crazy. Like, it's insane, bro. Like, on planes already, three times. I'm playing the valet parker freak. I can't go anywhere. I can't walk out of a mosque anymore without being. And it's. It's just crazy. And no one believed, man. No one. No one even talking about people closest to me. Me. No one believed in me, man. My girl. Did you know, my son, he was going back and forth. I was like, nah, that.

[B]

That.

[A]

No. He's like, dad. He's like, dad, you're actually going to make it. I like, I can't believe you. I believe in you now, you know? So it's like, I never did it for that. When I started the comeback team, every show would end with. And no matter what you've been through, no matter how bad it is, no matter how hopeless you may feel in this moment, as long as you still have air in your lungs, you can always make a comeback.

[B]

See, dude, you walk. You walk in here. You walk in here and you talk about jealousy for my hair. But, dude, that. That. That. That bass in your voice just gets right into your damn soul.

[A]

Do you know what kept me going, brother?

[B]

You're touching people, man.

[A]

You know what kept me going? Shout out to Al, my producer, Al Pepich. You know what kept him going?

[B]

What's that?

[A]

Kept us going.

[B]

What's that?

[A]

After a couple of months, somehow. I'm talking about 100 views, bro. Like, no views. Okay. Also, I mean, I did have some cosmic, you know, inspiration, because I got to start my podcast with Arthur Nascarella. Shout out. Arthur Nascarella played Carlo on the Sopranos. Famous actor.

[B]

Yeah, I know he is.

[A]

Tons of shows he was on. Billions he was on, you know, cop land, right? And Arthur, I got. I went from begging Arthur to just come on my show. So he co hosted, like, 20 of my first episodes. So, like, it just gave me this such a boost of morale. Even though I had no following, no nothing, I was like, I've already made it, man. And what really made me go was when I Get my first email, first message. There was a woman who was about to lose her eyesight, and she had, like, six more months to see, and she's like, I heard your episode. I had an amazing woman on my show named Silk. Silk is a survivor of domestic violence. She was beaten to the point where she's blind. So I was interviewing her about her life and how she's reinvented life and, you know, all that. She's an amazing human being, bro. Like, you got to get her on your show. And, Silk, I'm coming for you. I promise you, when I get this next bag, I'm coming for you, Silk, because that's my dream, man. People go, what's your dream drive? Ferrari? No, I want to walk into a refugee camp somewhere in the world and say, you guys lost everything. Not for the cameras, brother, because that's not authentic. Yeah, sometimes you need the cameras or to inspire others, though. You know what I mean? It's a fine line to do the same.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

You want to make sure your intentions for God and not for your own arrogance. So you know what kept me going, brother?

[B]

What's that?

[A]

She's like, I found out I'm going to be blind, and I. I didn't want to live like that. So I got everything ready, and I was going to take my own life. I heard your show. I heard your episode. I decided not to take my life because of you. And that just two people. Listen, I had said if I save one.

[B]

Yeah, if two people are listening to it and one of them says that.

[A]

You'Re doing it again, I was like, I'm not going. I'm not giving up. And then now it's thousands of people, bro. And then it, like, evolve, where instead of being the host, I go on a few shows, man. And then it just. It just went crazy, bro. Like, billions and billion. Like, literally billions of views. And I was at a very low point also at that time. Like, I was being tried in my personal life, you know, everything was kind of going rough, and it's, like, so easy to give up at this point. It's so easy. Like, I don't got time for this podcast anymore. My whole world's on fire. But then there's that voice inside, like, I'm not quitting, man. Like, I've already lost too much. Or as Eric Thomas would say, you're already going through pain, ET man, get in a. Get a reward for it, right? Shout out to Eric Thomas, man. I'll be on the stage soon, brother, because I have a story to tell the world, brother. All of a sudden, I'm at one of my lowest points. The phone starts like this. I'm like, what the hell's going on, bro?

[B]

You're everywhere, bro.

[A]

I was like, what do you mean? Tyrese Gibson just posted you, Bella, Hadid, like, everybody, bro. Kevin, Danny, this one that. I'm like, what the. Five years of darkness, and in two seconds, it changed.

[B]

That's how quickly it can.

[A]

Just like that. And now they all want me on their show, and this one's following me and that one and Tim Dillon just fine. God, it's just crazy, man. And I went, now, like, more of being a host. So, like, now I was like, no, we just want you on the show, man. But I miss the work, man. I miss having these inspirational stories like what you're kind of doing, right, to inspire other people, man. Because nothing helps you more than hearing people that have it worse than you, okay? Eric Patrick Thomas, man, please. One day I'm gonna get him to Vegas. God willing, man. He can't move from the neck down, okay? He lives in Flint, Michigan. Doesn't even have clean drinking water. Yeah, he doesn't even have water to take a bath, bro. And I gave him my word. I'm gonna get him out of that place, bro. I'm gonna get him out of there, bro. I met him through the work I do, but I have never met a more positive human being that. I am ashamed of myself when I'm in, grateful when I think about what this man goes through every day of his life. And I have all these blessings, bro. So that's what I'm saying. Like, you get inspired not only from the guests, but people, man. They need hope, man. And this guy, man, this guy's amazing, bro. He's in front of his house for no reason. A straight bullet hits him. He doesn't even have problems with anybody. He was no gang banger. None of that stuff. Can't move from his neck down. And I got problems, bro. You got problems.

[B]

We don't have those problems.

[A]

But I'm saying these stories inspire. He's the most positive human being you will ever meet in your life. And we got to help this guy, man. So that's why I want to launch. I want to relaunch. I still have my. My daily show. I want to relaunch that work now, now that things are moving. I love doing it.

[B]

You know Charlie in la. You know Charlie. Charlie has the dream factory. You should meet him. Dude, you have. You have very. He. He's he's got a very LA energy to him, and you got a very New York energy to you.

[A]

Funny thing is, I was born in Texas, but, yeah, that's another story.

[B]

But you. You guys have a lot of, like, Charlie owns a place. He does thing called the Dream Factory.

[A]

Just a little emotional, man, because. And I make a promise. Sometimes I'm late.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

And as an Albanian, we keep our word no matter what. But for a real Albanian, bro, it's embedded in our. In our culture, brother. It's called besa. It means when an Albanian gives you their word, they will lose their life before they break it. And I was brought up with that ideology. And so when I give someone my word, the reason I'm emotional, I talk about Eric is I'm like, man, it's already been two years since I made this promise. Like, I. I want to help this guy, man. And I'm going to because I. I love him. He's an amazing human being, bro. Damon Johns helped him out a few times. And, you know, from Shark Tank, shout out to Damon, I don't know him personally, but. So you start this journey, right? I'm here today because of a decision I decided to make five years ago with no experience, no one believed. I knew I had a gift, but I didn't know how to harness it yet, you know, to do it publicly. I have a little adhd. I'm a little hyper at times. Right? Which is good, because I never heard my clients telling me no, because you need 5 nos before you get a yes. And, you know, just going through all of that, man. Look, look, I got to meet you, right? So that one decision where I could have listened to everyone else around me, the critics out and in. Sometimes you're your own worst enemy. Instead, I said, no, man, no matter what, I'm gonna do it. And I had just lost a lot of money in a construction company, and I took the little money I had left and threw it all into equipment. And I was like, we're gonna do this. We're gonna make it happen. Here we are.

[B]

Well, as I always say, if you don't take up big losses, you're not entrepreneuring hard enough.

[A]

You're not. It's just, you know, some people get lucky their first shot around, but it. So, yeah, man. I mean. So do you want to talk some sales stuff?

[B]

Yeah, stock sales.

[A]

So I started in the industry that you're in. 18 years old. Cut my teeth in sales in commercial leasing in midtown Manhattan. Okay. One of the most competitive markets in the world. And I'm working for a Boutique firm on 8th Avenue, which is not a desirable location on your business card. And I'm in what's considered the Garmin district, which used to be the epicenter of New York manufacturing. So we sold our country out and everything went overseas to Bangladesh and India and all over the world. And I'm working for Al, who's my mom's first cousin. And you know, he's older than me and I'm only 18 years old. Web, you know what, behind the ears. Don't know much about life or sales or anything. I mean, I'm, I have courage, but I don't have much more than that. And he's like, here's your job. Like, what's my job? He's like, you see all these buildings? He's like, yeah, you're walk into that building today. You're going to go to the top floor, you're going to knock on the door, you're going to walk in and say, hi, my name is Beck, I'm from Castle Rock Realty. We work with a lot of tenants, not only in the building but in the area. You know, we can help you possibly find some space if you need to move. Basically my objective was to try to find out when their lease expires so we could build a database.

[B]

Sure.

[A]

And then try to follow up. I was terrified. So I'm going to walk into a building, I don't know anyone. I'm going to just go and try to meet the owner. Like, how am I going to do this? This is terrifying. He's like, kid, in those windows you're not seeing. Glad there's money in there, man. Go get the money. It's in there. I go in, man, I got thrown out in five seconds. First time. I had no idea how to talk fast and, you know, have a personality and open up the conversation. Right. I had no experience. That's what I want people to understand. I didn't wake up and become a world class speaker who has viral videos overnight. I didn't know what I was doing. I was scared. So the problem you have, if you are, we are in your life, is not because you don't know something none of us knew. You didn't know what you know about real estate 30 years ago, what you do today. Can you compare yourself to that guy?

[B]

No.

[A]

So when are you going to have what you're lacking, my friend? If you're why you're lacking courage, you have to have some courage in your life. You got to sit there and say, I. I think it's more scary to not try than try. I'd rather be the guy that tried everything and failed a million times than be a corporate serf the rest of my life. Barely getting by, not living life on my terms. And I learned that lesson the hard way. Getting to the top of the corporate world, making the money that people dream of making, and being completely miserable to the point where I was going with ambulances once a week, thinking I'm having heart attacks. It was panic attacks. Because I was miserable in the environment I was in.

[B]

Because you weren't aligned with your true values.

[A]

Because I was not living my purpose.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

So I think the secret to all of this to young people is if you could figure out, truly the hardest thing in life is not to make it, because you can make it financially and still not be happy. Right? The, the, the, the. The key, in my opinion, is to figure out what you really want to do.

[B]

So what does happiness mean for you?

[A]

To be able to produce a living doing something that you really love and are good at. And I think people don't take the cues that God gives them. I ignored my cues for a very long time, brother. Every single human being on earth has a gift that God gave them. Your gift might be that you make the best apple pie in the world, but you thinking, I gotta go onto Wall street and learn all this stuff. And you idiot, everyone keeps telling you, man, jimmy, I really love your apple pie. Jimmy, Jimmy, can you make us one for the holidays? And everyone's begging you to make hello, McFly. That's God telling you that's your gift. Listen to him. Everyone always told me, man, you have such a way of speaking. You inspire me. I knew this for years. I ignored my gift, man.

[B]

It's like, what's, what's the joke? The guy gets stranded on a desert island and says, oh, God's gonna save me. And then a. What is it? A tire comes by, and he could have grabbed onto it and he says, no, no, no, I'm not grabbing the tire because I'm waiting for God.

[A]

Exactly.

[B]

A small digging comes, right? I'm not doing that. That I'm waiting for God. And the ship comes by. No, I'm not doing that. And the guy ends up starving to death on the island.

[A]

Dies, goes to heaven, Answered your prayer. He goes to heaven.

[B]

Yeah. Why didn't you save me? I sent you a boat, a tire, and a dinghy.

[A]

You didn't even try.

[B]

Yeah. You grab any of them?

[A]

So I think. I think a Lot of young people, they're scared. They're worried about too much. What people think. They live in a world now where everything's under a microscope. They're living in a world where I call it the Easter Bunny Generation. The Easter Bunny Generation. So they feel a lot of fomo and they feel insignificant because they're looking at everyone, you know, cropping their life perfectly sure. So they feel like I'm behind my. You know, I'm not doing what my peers are doing. I'm a loser, you know, and subconsciously, right, these thoughts creep into their mind and they don't realize that even those people. There's been times, brother, I've posted, I'm in Aruba and everything's gorgeous, and I'm in the room crying, brother, like, you're not seeing everything that's going on in our lives. You need to remember this young generation. This is why they're the Easter Bunny generation. They are so beautiful because during Easter, right, you guys have the chocolates that are, like, hollow. You know, you grab the. You know, they sell them during that time. The eggs, they're hollow. That's why I call them the Easter Bunny Generation. They're absolutely beautiful on the outside.

[B]

They're hollow on the inside, but they're.

[A]

Empty on the inside. And because they're watching their other friends and everyone doing that, they always feel empty themselves. Because we weren't made to see everything that's going on all the time. You need to focus on what you're doing day by day, man. Don't worry about the noise. Your time will come, man. But you got to make a choice. You got to have some courage in your life, and you got to be willing to take a little bit of pain, otherwise nothing's going to change in your life.

[B]

So how do you reconcile with this? Because this is something that I. I fight with internally, personally, a lot, too. Which is the thing that is so good to us, which is social media and all of these clicks and all these views and all this stuff is also something that, in the back of my mind, not necessarily. I don't think my. My content's hurting anybody, but I think the fact that you're just sitting there scrolling mindlessly for hours, and I'm guilty.

[A]

Of it at times. I'm not gonna lie. I'm guilty of it.

[B]

So how do you scroll. Reconcile with that?

[A]

That's why I have a good woman next to me. She yells at me, you idiot, you.

[B]

More.

[A]

What are you doing? Are you gonna wake up? Grab your phone, go ahead, Scroll. No, but do you feel you should? I have a safety mechanism because, listen, it's addictive.

[B]

No, no. But do you feel that you're contributing to the same thing you're saying is causing that problem?

[A]

Yes or no? Because at least I'm not posting myself, you know, at least I'm posting content that inspires, maybe teaches a lesson, gives a good message where a lot of the other stuff is like, ridiculous stuff, bro, that, you know, can be very negative, fights, all these things. There's a lot of garbage on there that's very harmful for you. And, you know, people looking at women and this and that. I don't like the, the, the, the. The exploitation, in my opinion, of, you know, stuff like Kanye west just did. Like, come on, dude.

[B]

It was so ridiculous.

[A]

Ridiculous is not the word. It's like a mockery, man. And it's just. It's just disgusting. Like, you're that bad. You need. You need. You're one of the most famous people in the world. You needed that much clout, bro. Like, really, like, like, this is your wife. You love her. Like, you're letting everyone see what only your eyes should be seeing, man. Yeah, she loves it, too. Don't worry. She's a cloud chaser, too.

[B]

I reconcile it by thinking, you know, everybody's so worried. Like, let's look at. Look what people that eat, people that are, you know, heavy, morally, you know, really obese, eat terribly. So. They're so concerned if you eat a bunch of junk food, you're gonna be terrible. So what you consume with your brain is more important to me than what.

[A]

You consume with your mouth.

[B]

And so many people are just Kardashians, just junk food right into their brain. They're just shoving it right in their brain.

[A]

They don't realize it.

[B]

They don't realize.

[A]

They really do not realize what they're. That what. What they are allowing into to everything.

[B]

So at least I feel like I'm not making junk food.

[A]

No, man, you're making. You're making healthy food for the mind, man. That's how I can say, you know, that helps the world.

[B]

Cool. Well, dude, Beck, if they want. If they want to find more you, how do they do it?

[A]

Can follow all the handles at bek. That's be like Boy E, like Edward K. Like Kimberly Beck. There's no c. Beck lover NYC on IG tick tock x or becklover.com or you could watch the Becklover podcast anywhere. Podcasts are received.

[B]

I love it, brother. Well, dude, if you ever need anything here, you. You let me know. I got you. You're gonna come back, man.

[A]

Yeah, we'll come knock out another one. It was a lot we didn't talk about.

[B]

I do an hour goes quick, man. It goes quick.

[A]

I know, man. I gotta get to the next one too. Let's rock, brother. It's really nice to meet you, man.

[B]

You too. You too, man. Well, guys, I hope you enjoyed that as much as I did. And remember, man, if you're up against adversity, there is. It just takes like you heard how quickly this dude's life turned around.

[A]

Never give up.

[B]

It could turn around for you in his basie voice. Never give up.

[A]

Never surrender.

[B]

Never surrender.

[A]

We will not go silently into the night.

[B]

We'll see you next week. What's up, everybody? Thanks for joining us for another episode of Escaping the Drift. Hope you got a bonus bunch out of it. Or at least as much as I did out of it. Anyway, if you want to learn more about the show, you can always go over to escaping the drift.com. you can join our mailing list. But do me a favor, if you wouldn't mind, Throw up that five star review. Give us a share. Do something, man. We're here for you. Hopefully you'll be here for us. But anyway, in the meantime, we will see you at the next episode.