Podcast Summary: EXPANDED Podcast by To Be Magnetic™

Episode 382: From Self-Doubt to Self-Trust: The Process with Karin Hadidan
Air date: November 21, 2025
Host(s): Natalie, Lacey (TBM), featuring Karin Hadidan

Episode Overview

This episode dives into the journey from self-doubt to self-trust, exploring what it truly means to “return to self.” Through the candid, transformative story of author Karin Hadidan, listeners learn how identity, childhood imprints, cultural programming, and inner work blend in the process of deeply reconnecting with authenticity—and why this is the foundation for sustainable manifestation. The episode is a heartfelt exploration of embracing all parts of oneself, somatic healing, and the joy that comes from embodying worthiness, with actionable insights into integrating the TBM tools for radical self-acceptance.

Key Topics & Discussion Highlights

1. The Season of “Cocooning” and TBM’s End of Year Challenge

• The hosts discuss collective exhaustion and the need for rituals that ground and nurture the nervous system.
• This year’s "Return to Magic 15 Day Manifestation Challenge" is positioned as a path to reconnecting with authenticity via inner child work.
• Lacey: “In those small moments that we choose ourselves, we really honor the magic we bring to this earth.” [01:01]

2. Karin Hadidan’s Pre-TBM Journey: Achieving Without Inner Peace

• Karin began TBM to heal chronic illness, not specifically for love or career, despite already having success in those areas.
  • Faced repeated cycles of “not enough” and “too much” feelings rooted in childhood and cultural upbringing.
  • Achievements felt hollow: “When I was on number five on Amazon best sellers, it was actually a crushing moment for me… it’s not number one, so gotta work harder.” [13:00]
• The realization: fulfillment can’t be found purely in external achievements but in aligning with her higher self’s frequency.
  • “When that happens, the career, the opportunities, the love of my life, the body—everything else will energetically align.” [13:56]

3. Childhood Imprints & Cultural Programming

• Karin describes a loving Armenian immigrant upbringing, but one where emotions—especially “negative” ones—were rarely processed.
• Parents’ survival and scarcity modes inadvertently transferred beliefs about safety and worth.
• The “too muchness”/“not enoughness” root belief reinforced in school and relationships.

4. Emotional Release and Somatic Healing

• Karin struggled to feel and express difficult emotions, holding years of pain in her body and developing chronic illness (endometriosis).
• Breathwork became her route to emotional release:
  • First major release happened during a holotropic breathwork class after the instructor told her, “You are safe to feel. Let it go, let it go, let it go.” [21:48]
• “I did not start crying … up until maybe two and a half years ago. … Now I cry without even needing to attach a story to it.” [24:03]
• She underscores the importance of somatic (body-based) healing alongside mental/emotional processing.

5. Reprocessing & Gratitude for the Inner Child

• Doing shadow work through TBM allowed Karin to grieve, tend, and ultimately release attachment to past versions of herself.
  • “When you finally feel the depth of those emotions that your inner child never felt, and you grieve that, you’re able to put that version of you to rest without any attachment.” [27:16]
• This self-parenting brings “deep, unshakable gratitude” for all versions of self and the imperfect journey.

6. School System Micro-Traumas & Loss of Authenticity

• Karin shares the defining moment of shrinking her identity:
  • At age 7, peers laughed at her Armenian name, and she adopted a more “American” version (“Karen Hadadin”) for 18 years.
  • “That was when I lost my authenticity.” [36:40]
• The powerful ripple effect of reclaiming her name and identity: “I no longer want to suppress who I am… Did extraordinary aligned people come in from that? Oh my God, yeah.” [40:15]

7. Authentic Visibility, Expansion, and Trust

• Reclaiming her name and accepting her wholeness led to new layers of confidence, self-trust, and flow.
• Major story: Her first live poetry performance. Initially motivated by ego/romantic possibilities, she shifted to pure self-expression:
  • “When my body finally felt safe being seen… I just felt like my 8-year-old self who loved to do plays… I was so in my body. I was so, so magnetic because I was operating from wholeness.” [44:55]
• Audience impact was moving, but even when book sales were low, she recognized her inner child’s healing as the real “win.”
  • “That day could have looked so differently. … But I took that as: I gave my inner child a stage that she would be marveling at.” [47:12]

8. The Surrender of Manifestation & Detachment from Outcomes

• Karin describes a deep shift from striving for specifics, to releasing control and living in genuine surrender.
  • “Each time I say I want something, I’ve already put a limit on it because I’m like, I want it this way. And God is not on a budget...” [49:51]
  • “The present moment is the miracle. I am the miracle.” [50:16]

9. Tangible Tools and Integrating Visibility

• Internal blockages around visibility extend far beyond social media—they often start with our willingness to even see ourselves.
• Karin’s healing practice: Sitting naked in front of the mirror, holding parts of her body, and practicing loving acceptance.
  • “Slowly, I started to see my soul, not my physical body… now, because I see my soul, because I see myself—the love, that’s what I am.” [59:30]
• Suggests similar “gazing exercises” and self-attunement to all listeners, emphasizing the power of ritual and conscious self-connection.

10. Ego Death as a Pathway to Soul

• Profound ego deaths—romantic, professional, physical—stripped away the illusion of lack and forced Karin into radical self-love.
  • Example: Meeting a “dream partner” who left suddenly, which propelled her into a solo trip and deeper communion with her soul.
  • “I don’t need anyone to make me feel loved. I have all of the love inside of me.” [64:11]

11. The Stillness Prescription

• For “good student archetypes” or those who overwork at healing, Karin prescribes stillness, presence, and only acting from a place of curiosity and love—not fear.
  • “Am I doing this because I need to fix something or because I want a certain outcome? Or am I doing this because I’m genuinely curious and want to show love to myself?” [72:19]
• Natalie and Lacey expand on how practices like DI (deep imagining) are best used as daily tools for self-connection, not as a punishment or “fix.”

12. Spiritual and Human Duality

• The true purpose of inner work isn’t detachment from humanity or pain—instead, it’s the deepening of presence in every moment of embodied experience.
  • “The point was to stay in that energy of love and wholeness… in the human world. … Our souls will miss all of this. … The only outcome you ever want is to be fully alive in each moment, whatever that holds.” [76:53]

Notable Quotes and Moments

• Karin Hadidan:

  • “I just know that if I show up authentically without suppressing myself, then I’m inviting other people to do the same. And when the entire world does that, just imagine the amount of love that would overpower all the pain in everyone’s life. The world really does need my light.” [00:00]
  • “I didn’t feel inner peace. I was constantly pushing for the next thing without simmering where I was.” [12:45]
  • “If my body did not change until now, until the day that I die, how would I live? Would I hate it?” [57:20]
  • “The present moment is the miracle. I am the miracle.” [50:16]
  • “Once you arrive and once you remember who you are—and I don’t mean your authentic code. I mean your essence, your divinity—you will never believe that you are too much because how could you be? You are an expression of God.” [69:56]

• Natalie:

  • “It’s in the contrast that everything feels so good. You can’t experience that joy without that hardship. So it’s just like the acceptance of all of it.” [29:48]
  • “If we can just get our monkey minds out of the way and actually witness the miracle of the present moment…” [48:00]
  • “We have to have that balance between the two parts of self. That is the journey—the return to self, the return to magic.” [76:05]

• Lacey:

  • “If you are walking into this season feeling burnt out, overwhelmed, exhausted, tested, triggered in love, money, career, relationships… you are not alone. It has been a massive year of endings, ego deaths and transformation cycles. And when that happens, it’s always your inner child, your safety, your self-worth … that takes the hit.” [52:30]

Timestamps for Key Segments

• 00:00-03:00 — Introduction and thematic setup (authenticity, return to self, collective burnout)
• 10:08-13:56 — Karin’s pre-TBM life, success without fulfillment
• 17:00-20:02 — Childhood, family roots, cultural programming, and lessons about emotions
• 20:48-25:06 — Karin’s journey to feeling emotions, breakthrough via breathwork
• 27:01-28:53 — Shadow work, grieving and integrating the inner child
• 36:40-40:15 — School-age loss of authenticity, reclaiming her name and identity
• 42:49-47:13 — Public speaking breakthrough, embracing visibility and its lessons
• 49:18-50:45 — Surrender, detachment from outcomes, “present as the miracle”
• 56:40-61:09 — Tangible practices for healing, “mirror work” for body image and self-love
• 62:32-63:22 — Gazing practices; connecting with the soul as a daily ritual
• 63:22-67:31 — Romantic ego death leading to true inner union
• 69:16-72:56 — Mini ego deaths, learning to trust stillness, curiosity-driven action
• 74:07-79:26 — Last reflections on ongoing practice, living present, and new book announcement

Additional Resources & Where to Find Karin Hadidan

• Instagram: @icietnu (French for “here and now”)
• Substack: Karin Hadidan (her favorite writing platform)
• TikTok: @karinhadidan

All books and latest updates are linked via her Instagram bio and on Amazon. Her next book, "When Nothing Makes Sense: Finding God in the Gap Between Prayer and Answer" is coming soon.

Closing Reflection

This episode is a masterclass on the lived experience of manifestation—where the greatest magic is returning to one’s soul through deep self-trust and acceptance. Karin’s story offers permission and inspiration for anyone feeling stuck, “too much,” invisible, or exhausted by the pursuit of external validation. Through nervous system nurture, inner child work, conscious surrender, and ritual, she models the path from self-doubt to embodied self-trust.

For more episodes, tools, or to join the “Return to Magic” challenge, visit tobemagnetic.com.