Check it Out: “Use a Messy Closet, a 3-Hour Rule for Difficult People & Renowned Judy Blume on Reading”

Summary

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  • Title: Fail Better with David Duchovny
  • Host/Author: Lemonada Media
  • Description: Focuses on discussions about failure and growth with various successful individuals.

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  • Features Gretchen Rubin and Elizabeth Craft discussing topics related to happiness, productivity, and an interview with Judy Blume.
  • Mentions segments like "Happiness Hack," "Read 25 and 25," and advertisements unrelated to Fail Better.

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Transcript

[Dr. Laurie Santos]

Guess what? Discover is accepted at 99% of places that take credit cards nationwide. You heard right, 99%. If you don't think so, maybe it's time to face facts. You're stuck in the past. Based on the February 2024 Nelson Report. Learn more at discover.com credit card I'm Dr. Laurie Santos and to welcome the.

[Gretchen Rubin]

New year, my podcast, the Happiness Lab.

[Dr. Laurie Santos]

Is releasing a series of happiness how to guides to help you in 2025. I'll distill the wisdom of world class.

[Gretchen Rubin]

Experts into easy to actionable tips.

[Dr. Laurie Santos]

Struggling with tough emotions? We have a How To Guide. Worried that you're not enough? We got you self obsessed and want to get over yourself. There's a guide for that too. The Happiness Lab's How to season starts January 1st. Listen on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts.

[Gretchen Rubin]

Or wherever you get your podcast.

[Elizabeth Craft]

Lemonade.

[Judy Blume]

Hey Fail Better Listeners this week I wanted to share a special episode of Happier, hosted by past guest Gretchen Rubin. Gretchen considers herself a happiness bully and her podcast explores how we can live a more fulfilling life. Sometimes we don't have time to cross all the things off our to do list, and Gretchen reminds us that that's okay. This episode highlights a useful and guilt free strategy for handling important tasks that can't be done right away. Her happiness hack includes temporarily stashing things in a metaphorical messy closet until the timing is right. We could all use a little more organization in our lives and grace, now that I think about it. So I'm excited to share this episode with you. After you listen, Search Happier with Gretchen Rubin wherever you get your podcasts to hear more tips. She also has a handful of books for improving well being and creating lasting positive habits. Now on to the show.

[Gretchen Rubin]

Hello and welcome to Happier, a podcast where we talk about ideas and strategies for making our daily lives happier. This week we'll talk about why you might want to stash something in the messy closet. And we will be talking to the legendary author Judy Blume. I'm Gretchen Rubin, a writer who studies happiness, good habits, secrets of adulthood, human nature. I'm in my little home office in New York City and joining me today from Los Angeles is my sister, Elizabeth Croft. And Elizabeth, I would say that for both of us a Judy Blume conversation is definitely something that we have wanted to do our whole lives.

[Elizabeth Craft]

That's me, Elizabeth Craft, a TV writer and producer living in la. And yes, Gretchen, I mean my mind is blown. Yes, right now I'm thinking of. I think we shared it a copy of Are youe There, God? It's me, Margaret, with the purple cover that was just frayed and falling apart. I mean, we've read everything she's ever written. Huge fans.

[Gretchen Rubin]

Yes. And are you there, God? Has the rare appearance of a Gretchen in fiction. So I appreciate that she's not a great Gretchen, but she's there. But before we launch in, I wanna announce my book tour. I am starting my book on April 1st. All the information [e-mail] secrets because of secrets of Adulthood. But if you are in the following cities, I am coming your way. And of course I always love to see listeners. So please come Washington, D.C. boston, Kansas City, Missouri of course, Lexington, Kentucky, Bloomington, Indiana, Tulsa, Oklahoma, San Diego, California, Corta Madeira, Los Angeles, Wake Forest, Washington, Coral Gables, Florida, Miami, Florida, Tampa, Florida and New York City. So I'm going to a lot of different places and I really hope to connect with a lot of listeners and readers there. I can't wait.

[Elizabeth Craft]

So fun.

[Gretchen Rubin]

We coming your way, Elizabeth?

[Elizabeth Craft]

Yes, I think I will be at that event, Gretch.

[Gretchen Rubin]

Likely you're a good sister.

[Elizabeth Craft]

And then Gretchen, we heard from Brianna on the subject of being an obliger. She said, I have listened to the podcast off and on over the years, just found myself taking the tendency quiz. I am an obliger. This realization has helped me immensely, starting with joining an online co working platform. The accountability of a few other people on screen where our list is visible and we celebrate at the end is just the outer accountability I needed. I have become three times more productive and ensure that my list includes personal needs as well as work and school. I've redefined productivity and have been able to take care of others while also making sure I take care of myself. I am a big fan and a transformed listener. That's wonderful, Gretch.

[Gretchen Rubin]

That is so great to hear. Yeah, sometimes you just need that insight. Like, oh, I need the outer accountability. And then when you get it, everything unlocks. If you want to take the quiz that Brianna mentions, it'[e-mail] quiz and it will tell you whether you're in a polder question or obliged or revel and give you a little report. So I'm always thrilled to hear when people benefit from the four tendencies. That's so great.

[Elizabeth Craft]

Yes.

[Gretchen Rubin]

This week our try this at home suggestion is to stash something in the messy closet.

[Elizabeth Craft]

Now, I think you're meaning this metaphorically, Gretch. Not literally.

[Gretchen Rubin]

Yes. Okay. So the way this came up in my life is so you know, I work with this brilliant team. And we were getting together, and something came up, and somebody said, hey, I think we need to put this in the messy closet for now. And we all just really glommed on to this phrase, the messy closet. And. And what the messy closet is, is you're not saying that something's not important, or you're not saying that you're never gonna deal with it. You're just saying this is not the time to deal with it. It's not gonna be dealt with right now. We're gonna stash it in the messy closet. Cause everything in there is just very messy and needs to be sorted out. But not right now. It's important, but it's just about. You're gonna take it out of the closet when the time is right.

[Elizabeth Craft]

I love this, Gretch. Of course, you know, I do have a lot of actual messy closets. Yes, you do. So this one, really. And as soon as you said this, I thought of something that Sarah and I have stashed in the messy closet. So, you know, we're writing a novel, and we got stalled on it, and we did this big sort of mental reset to restart working on it. At the same time, we got this huge rewrite we had to do on our Netflix pilot, and it got to a point where we just couldn't deal with both of these things.

[Gretchen Rubin]

Right.

[Elizabeth Craft]

So we just had to put the novel in the messy closet because. Just couldn't deal with it right now.

[Gretchen Rubin]

Right.

[Elizabeth Craft]

We will pull it back out once we're done with this pilot, but we just had to stash it.

[Gretchen Rubin]

Yeah. I think it's a way to be realistic with yourself that not all things can happen at all times with the Netflix project. It has a deadline attached to it.

[Elizabeth Craft]

Exactly.

[Gretchen Rubin]

Now, I know that you and Sarah have talked about the problem for the two of you if you don't have a deadline and how you have to sort of create your own deadlines, because you don't. But now you've done so much work on it. Not plausible that you would abandon it because it's just, like, so much some cost. But it is good to be like, okay, we're gonna deal with this, but then the minute that we can, we're gonna open up the closet and deal with it. And, you know, it's just a good example of having the right language for something. It conveys the right associations. I think that's really useful. My team talking about the messy closet. It's very clarifying, because everybody knows what we mean by that. We don't have to argue about. No, no. This thing is really important. It's like. No, you're not saying it's not important. I guess it's kind of like saying that you're putting something on the back. And Eliza, I guess you and I don't cook, so maybe that metaphor doesn't resonate with us.

[Elizabeth Craft]

That's true.

[Gretchen Rubin]

But messy closets, we think about a lot for one way or another.

[Elizabeth Craft]

And I do also like that it implies a little bit of chaos, whereas a bag burner doesn't. At least not for us. Yes, we're not putting it in a clean closet. We're putting it in the messy closet.

[Gretchen Rubin]

It's something that it's gonna be a thing to deal with it. And there's a lot going on in there that does not look pretty. But eventually it will get sorted.

[Elizabeth Craft]

And yes, hopefully the time will come very soon. Gretchen, will Sarah and I pull our novel out of our messy closet?

[Gretchen Rubin]

Yeah.

[Elizabeth Craft]

And get it all nice and cleaned.

[Gretchen Rubin]

Up and out into the world. Well, let us know if you do try this at home and how stashing something in the messy closet works for you. What have you stashed in the messy closet? Let us know on Instagram threads, TikTok, Facebook, email [e-mail] or go to the show notes happiercast.com 524 for everything related to this episode.

[Elizabeth Craft]

Coming up, we've got a happiness hack that could make your time with others turn out better. But first, this break.

[Judy Blume]

We all know that going out to eat can break the bank, especially if the whole family comes along. And grocery shopping saves money. Sure, but then you have to spend all this time planning what to make. That's why I'm excited to tell you about Home Chef, which can save both time and money and still give you those great restaurant quality meals. Home Chef delivers fresh ingredients and chef design recipes right to your doorstep. To simplify your cooking experience, users of leading meal kits have rated Home Chef number one in quality, convenience, value, taste, and recipe ease.

[Dr. Laurie Santos]

Whew.

[Judy Blume]

And it's easy to see why. Home Chef can make cooking fit into anyone's life in a simple way. Whether you want to go all out with a flavorful soup or are looking For a quick five ingredient fix, Home Chef offers 30 meal options each week, and they cater to a whole range of dietary needs. Like I mentioned before, my son is starting to find his footing in the kitchen. Not the best choice of words, foot and kitchen, but Home Chef is turning out to be a great tool for him. To use. He loves it. For a limited time, Home Chef is offering my listeners 18 free meals plus free dessert for life and of course, free shipping. On your first box, go to homechef.com failbetter that's homechef.com failbetter for 18 free meals and free dessert for life. Homechef.com failbetter must be an active subscriber to receive free dessert. This episode of Fail Better is brought to you by booking.com booking yeah, every time I use booking.com to find a place to stay in the U.S. i know I'll get what I'm looking for. They have a wide variety of options, from hotels to vacation rentals, and I'm always able to find something that fits my specific needs. I found that booking.com has something for everyone. I've never seen a booking site that lets you filter by so many amenities and features. You can sort by which places have a fitness center if they're pet friend friendly. I just found a hotel that has beachfront and an indoor pool so you can really get the best of both worlds or all worlds, depending on what you're looking for. I've been trying to plan some trips that aren't just for work and I'm I'm confident that I'll be able to find something that suits me through booking.com I like knowing that whether I'm up for a ski trip or a beach vacation or even just a place with its own kitchen, which I'm increasingly interested in, I'll have plenty of options. No matter who you are, Booking.com helps you find the stay that's right for you. Find exactly what you're booking for on booking.com booking yeah, are you still quoting.

[Dr. Laurie Santos]

30 year old movies? Have you said cool beans in the past 90 days? Do you think Discover isn't widely accepted? If this sounds like you, you're stuck in the past. Discover is accepted at 99% of places that take credit cards nationwide and every time you make a purchase with your card, you automatically earn cash back. Welcome to the now it pays to Discover. Learn [e-mail] credit card based on the February 2024 Nielsen report.

[Elizabeth Craft]

Okay, Gretch, we are back with this week's Happiness Hack.

[Gretchen Rubin]

I love when there's a very specific metric put around something and I think sometimes this can get a little bit out of control and people put numbers attached to things that don't really lend themselves to numbers. But sometimes numbers are really useful. And I was reading an article in the Wall Street Journal called Boomers and Gen Xers enter their gray divorce era, and Thanksgiving won't be the same. And what caught my eye is that a therapist was commenting that if you're in a situation where you suspect that people might have trouble getting along. So she was talking about specifically, like, in a divorce context. But this comes up in many contexts. She observed people can be amicable for shorter periods of time. So she suggests limiting gatherings to three hours. And I just thought that was, like, a good number to have in your mind. People can keep it together for a while, but after a while, they get tired. If it's like a holiday occasion, maybe they're, like, drinking, and so their inhibitions start dropping. So maybe, like, less attractive behavior starts emerging. It just gets later at night, so people are getting sleepy. And just after a certain amount of time, it just gets harder to stay on your best behavior.

[Elizabeth Craft]

Yes. And three hours is good because it's enough that you really have spent time with people. It's not just rushing someone in and out the door.

[Gretchen Rubin]

Yes.

[Elizabeth Craft]

This goes with something we talk about, which is plan your exit.

[Gretchen Rubin]

Plan your exit. Like, if you're in a place and you're like, I think after three hours, I'm gonna have had enough. Make sure that nobody's blocked you in in the driveway. Maybe you park your car a block away so that you know you can leave when you want, or you drive your own car instead of getting a ride with somebody else so that you can leave when you want. And I just thought that it was helpful to have a number from somebody who's observed across many, many different situations and many different people, that three hours seems to be a good limit. Yeah. And you're right. Three hours is plenty. Like, of course, some families, like our families, hang out for hours. But three hours, you feel like you've had some good hangout time.

[Elizabeth Craft]

Yes. Yes, absolutely.

[Gretchen Rubin]

And now, as part of our Read 25 and 25 inspiration, we have an interview with none other than Judy Blume.

[Elizabeth Craft]

Yes, she really needs no introduction, but we'll give her one anyway.

[Gretchen Rubin]

Yes.

[Elizabeth Craft]

Judy Blume is a prolific American author who has written fiction for children, young adults, and adults. Together, her 29 books have sold more than 92 million copies in 40 languages. She has won numerous awards and honors.

[Gretchen Rubin]

She's best known for her realistic portrayals of young people. Some of our favorite titles, I think. Elizabeth? Are. Are you there, God? It's me, Margaret. Tales of a Fourth Grade Nothing so Funny, Deanie. Then again, maybe I won't. It's not the end of the World. I mean, there are so many.

[Elizabeth Craft]

So many. And Judy Blume co founded and works at a nonprofit independent bookstore, Books and Books Key west, which opened in 2016.

[Gretchen Rubin]

Welcome, Judy.

[Elizabeth Craft]

Welcome.

[Judy Blume]

Hi.

[Gretchen Rubin]

Oh, my gosh. This is such a thrill. You're such an icon. It's amazing.

[Elizabeth Craft]

Yes.

[Judy Blume]

Not to me.

[Gretchen Rubin]

Not to you. Not to you.

[Judy Blume]

I'm a regular person.

[Gretchen Rubin]

Yeah, well. Cause we're doing read 25 and 25 in the year 2025. You are such a representative of reading for many people. You're sort of one of the first books that gets them excited about reading, which is such a hugely powerful thing. I'm actually in two children's literature reading groups where we as adults read children's literature and young adult literature. We've read many of your books in these groups. You've also written for adults. You're the perfect person to talk about why reading is something that is going to make us happier in 2025.

[Judy Blume]

It does, I think. You want me to tell you why I think that?

[Gretchen Rubin]

Oh, sure.

[Judy Blume]

Please save that. Well, I mean, for me, it takes me out of whatever's going on in my life and allows me to be in someone else's life, in someone else's story. And especially these days, that is very important to me. I can't listen to the news at night or watch the news before I go to sleep, but I can get into bed with a book. And even if it's, you know, 15, 20, 25 minutes, with that book, I'm able to go to sleep because I'm in someone else's story. And I love stories, you know, I guess that's why I'm a writer. I've always made them up, and I like to read other people's stories.

[Elizabeth Craft]

Well. And Judah, you co founded a nonprofit bookstore, Books and Books in Key west, which is definitely on my bucket list.

[Gretchen Rubin]

I've been there. I've been there.

[Judy Blume]

I've been there.

[Gretchen Rubin]

Yeah, you weren't there that day, but I visited.

[Judy Blume]

Oh, I can't believe that. Gretchen.

[Gretchen Rubin]

Yeah.

[Judy Blume]

George and I founded it. We're nonprofit. We're a part of an arts building there called the Studios of Key West. And, you know, I like that because I can say, oh, buy this. Oh, buy that. And it's not for me. It's nonprofit. It's a very, very satisfying second career for me.

[Elizabeth Craft]

And when people come in, if they say to you that they want to read more, what tips do you have or hacks for getting more reading into your day?

[Judy Blume]

Well, it's hard, I have to say. For a while there, when we started the store, I thought I had less reading time because I was so busy all night. But now I think I'm actually back on track. I. I'm reading more books than maybe I ever read before. I read a lot when my kids were little, before I started to write. I found that when I was writing a book, I couldn't read another. If I was writing fiction, I couldn't read fiction because I have to stay within the story I was telling. Not everyone is like that. I mean, that's just the way it was for me. So I could read nonfiction during that time. But really I like to stay inside my characters heads and inside the story they were telling me because they tell it to me. So it's hard to find time. I think you have to make time. I once asked a dear friend of mine, very smart woman, how do you read? What do you do? And she said, I make time every afternoon. She was no longer working, she was retired. She said, I make that time every afternoon around 3:00 and I try to do the same thing. It might be 4 o'clock for me. After I get home, just conk out with a book.

[Gretchen Rubin]

Being in a bookstore, spending so much time in a bookstore. What have you learned about how people read and what draws them to a book? Have you had any insights? Just seeing how people engage when they're in the bookstore.

[Judy Blume]

I'm always surprised.

[Gretchen Rubin]

Oh, why? Interesting.

[Judy Blume]

You know, I mean, I've had some training now as a bookseller and I mean I ask certain things if they don't know if they want to be guided to their next favorite book. I do ask them what they like to read and what was the last book that they loved. And then I might suggest something completely different. I might suggest a book that I just read that not everybody knows about yet. Our manager, we have little staff rec cards hanging on certain books. Our manager writes the best staff recommendations. I don't know if you saw that Gretchen, when you were in the floor.

[Gretchen Rubin]

I always love Emily.

[Judy Blume]

Pick Emily. Emily writes great ones. George can get anybody to read a book because he writes great blurbs like that. I am hopeless at writing blurbs, which I always tell people who ask me for a blurb. I truly am. This is not my superpower. I can't do a good blurb. But every now and then I'll do a staff wreck. And I see the difference. I mean, it really, really makes people want that book and you know, they'll just fly out of the store. Recently, recently there was A book that was flying out of our store, and I hadn't read it, called God of the Woods.

[Elizabeth Craft]

Oh, I'm listening to it right now. Okay.

[Judy Blume]

So I hadn't read it, and I thought, I need to read this book and see what everybody is so excited about. And honestly, I could not put that book down. It was just. I had to keep going. I had to keep going. So, you know, I can understand why. And even yesterday, we were out of it. And we're a very small store. We get 12 copies at a time. That is a lot of copies for us. And they fly right out.

[Elizabeth Craft]

So there are those books.

[Judy Blume]

And that's word of mouth. That is word of mouth.

[Gretchen Rubin]

Yeah. Yeah.

[Judy Blume]

Well.

[Elizabeth Craft]

And how about you? What do you like to read? What is your personal taste? Are you a cozy mystery person? Fantasy, sci fi? What are you reading right now?

[Judy Blume]

I can say no to all of the above.

[Elizabeth Craft]

Okay.

[Gretchen Rubin]

You like realistic fiction?

[Judy Blume]

I do like realistic fiction, yeah.

[Gretchen Rubin]

That's what you write and probably what you write.

[Judy Blume]

I do. And we have plenty of people in the store who love fantasy. Love sci fi, cozy mysteries. We have someone in town who writes cozy mysteries. So, you know, you don't have to know all the books. You have to know some of the books and really care about some of the books. So fiction is. Is my thing. And, yeah, I'm still a realistic fiction girl, just like when I started to write.

[Gretchen Rubin]

And how do you feel? What's your stance on audiobooks?

[Judy Blume]

I think it's fabulous. I think audiobooks are great. My husband, who is a great reader and listener, always is listening to one and reading one, not, you know, together, but at the same time, he can do that. I could never do that, but put me in a car where I hate to be for a couple of hours, and I'll be listening. And I love it. I mean, it makes the time go so much faster in a car where I don't want to be. But otherwise, I still tend to. I like the book. I like the book in my hands. But audiobooks are fabulous ebooks. I mean, my daughter is a very big reader, and she reads on a tablet because it's easier for her to see. And she can get her books on that tablet through our nonprofit store. So that's good. However the story comes. And for kids, it's. However, learning to listen helps a child understand a story. I think listening goes along with becoming a reader.

[Gretchen Rubin]

Oh, interesting.

[Judy Blume]

Yeah. When my grandson was very small, he loved the fudge books. Of course. Right?

[Gretchen Rubin]

Of course.

[Judy Blume]

And I read them. I cannot stand My own voice. So I never listened to them. But he read them and my, I mean, listen. He listened to them and I was reading them and my daughter said to me, you don't know what it's like to be a grown up with your own home and have to hear your mother's voice all day long. And I said, randy, get him a headset. And she did. And then everything was cool.

[Gretchen Rubin]

Oh, that's very.

[Judy Blume]

He's a grown up now.

[Gretchen Rubin]

Oh, that's very funny. That's very funny. Yeah. Occupational hazard.

[Elizabeth Craft]

Judy, reading about you, I read that even when you're working at home, when you were writing, you would put on an outfit every day. And our mom does that. And I just wanted to ask about that and your thinking on that.

[Judy Blume]

Well, I'm wearing a bracelet. I always wear a bracelet. And I'm. The outfit is. It's a T shirt and pants, but it's fresh. Take my shower, wash my hair, put on little lipstick. Yes, I always did that. I always did that. Yeah, because it's going out to work. I mean, for many, many years I left, I lived in a house in Key West. Now I live in a condo. But for all those years that I lived in the house, I actually left the house, walked a few steps to the guest house where I had my study, where I worked, and it was going out to work.

[Gretchen Rubin]

That was your commute?

[Judy Blume]

Okay, that was my commute.

[Elizabeth Craft]

That's a good commute. Love it. Now, Judy, you've been writing for your whole life, and you're one of the most widely banned authors in American history, which seems hard to believe.

[Gretchen Rubin]

Bonkers.

[Elizabeth Craft]

Did that ever make you want to stop writing or change what you wrote? Did it make you more defiant about writing? How did that impact you?

[Judy Blume]

I would say, first of all, I don't mean to correct you, but I would say that the 70s was a very good time for children's books and children's book writers. The big first banning of my lifetime was started in 1980 and went through like it was with the presidential election of 1980. Judith Krug, who then headed up the American Library Association, Freedom to Read, said that the censors came out of the woodwork overnight. Like, it was different then. I mean, it was then. It was. We are going to tell you what kids can read, but it wasn't coming from the government. I mean, it was terrible. It was terrible, you know, to go through that in the 80s. And I, in the beginning, I felt alone and discouraged, even a little bit frightened. What this is because I never Wanted to hurt any kids and certainly didn't and don't now, but somebody telling you that your books are dangerous, and what do you do? So I was really lucky, and I found an organization called the National Coalition Against Censorship. Very small organization, just getting going. And they helped me become an activist. And when you learn to speak out, I think it helps you feel better. You're doing something. You're not just sitting at home saying, poor little me, what can I do? You're out there and you're doing something, and. And you're doing it not just for you, but for all the other writers who were being banned. And we used to go around together, I mean, and it was a tough time. And then it was like, okay, libraries now, school libraries especially, have their policies in place. And that was the big thing, to get your policies in place, so that if a parent came in waving a book, demanding its removal, you knew what to do if you were the librarian. And by the 90s, I don't know. Yeah, there were still some book bannings, but it was, you know, nothing like what's happening today, which is truly, truly frightening because this is coming from government.

[Gretchen Rubin]

It's great that you're working with others to stand up against it.

[Judy Blume]

Yeah. We're having. I just tell you, there's a book out called that Librarian, and it's written by a school librarian, Amanda Jones. She is coming to our bookstore. I'm very excited about this, in a week or so to talk about her experiences. And they're pretty shattering. And you ask, you know, does it discourage you? I think it can discourage you, but when you find out you're not alone and other people can rally around. And I think that's what happened with Amanda. You know, she's become an activist, she's speaking out, she's received death threats, and she's been just crucified online on social media. She's been crucified in social media, but she's trying to help other librarians who are facing the same situation.

[Gretchen Rubin]

Well, that's such important work. Well, on a lighter note, Judy, before we let you go, we always ask our guests, is there something that you would suggest that listeners can do as part of their ordinary day? Something that doesn't take a lot of time, energy, or money to make themselves happier. Is there anything you do or want to suggest?

[Judy Blume]

Well, for me, it's. I'm tired at the end of the workday, and I'm old and I'm tired, and I like to flop on my bed and pick up a Book and read. And if I fall asleep, great. Have a little nap before dinner. And if I don't, you know, I'm just reading and I'm calming down after a long and difficult day.

[Gretchen Rubin]

So you slot it in as part of your coming home ritual?

[Judy Blume]

Yes, I really like it. And if I'm working at home and I do have secretary or two who come in and help me at home in the days that I'm not at the store, they know that come 3:30 or 4:00, Judy is toast.

[Elizabeth Craft]

I am so burned out.

[Judy Blume]

I need that. But looking back, I think I always needed that. So, you know, if you can give yourself that, great. I know not everybody can. It's a luxury.

[Gretchen Rubin]

Well, thank you so much. This has been such a pleasure. Judy Blum, so great to talk to you.

[Elizabeth Craft]

So thank you.

[Judy Blume]

Thank you. Thank you, Gretchen. Thank you, Liz.

[Gretchen Rubin]

More reading for all.

[Elizabeth Craft]

Coming up. I give myself a reading demerits. But first, this break.

[Judy Blume]

If I mention iconic actors like James Dean or Steve McQueen, what pops into your head? That classic look, right? Fitted white tee, blue jeans, Converse. Still as fresh today as it was when I was a kid. So why is nailing that effortlessly cool put together look so tough these days? I have a hunch it has something to do with trends seemingly changing every week. Who has time for timeless style? I recently discovered the Swedish clothing brand Ask it and they're committed to nailing those wardrobe essentials. You know, the perfect white T shirt, raw denim, a great gray sweatshirt, a cashmere crew neck, my uniform. They're obsessed with perfecting those classic staples rather than reinventing the wheel every season. While everyone else is busy pumping out thousands of different pieces, Ask it has spent the last 10 years focusing on just one collection. Collection of 45 garments. They're all about super high quality materials, amazing fits and a classic color palette. And everything's 100 manufactured in Europe. The long sleeve T shirt. I mean, I'm, I'm a T shirt aficionado and they just nailed it. They got it right. And I do like a long sleeve T shirt too. And that's what I got. I've called myself old fashioned before and I'll do it again. In this case, quite literally. That's not just old. I'm saying old fashioned. It's about owning fewer, better things. Clothes that I actually love and that will last. It just makes getting dressed so much easier. And yeah, it can hurt if it helps me channel little McQueen. No discounts ever. If you don't need anything, don't buy. If you're considering something, visit ask it.com that's a s k e t dot com.

[Dr. Laurie Santos]

This message is brought to you by Cologuard, a non invasive Colon Cancer Screening Test did you know that colon cancer is considered the most preventable yet least prevented cancer when caught at early stages? Colon cancer is survivable in 90% of people, so screening and early detection are key to reducing overall colon cancer deaths. That's why the American Cancer Society recommends that if you're at average risk, you begin screening for colon cancer at age 45. And a convenient way to do that is with the Cologuard test. The Cologuard test is delivered to your door and allows you to feel more in control of your colon cancer screening and do it on your own schedule with none of the prep that is required of a colonoscopy. Plus, the Cologuard test is affordable. Most Insured patients pay $0 and if a follow up colonoscopy is needed, this is covered by most insurance plans. So if you're 45 or older and at average risk, ask your healthcare provider about screening for colon cancer with the Cologuard test. You can also request a Cologuard prescription [e-mail] podcast. The Cologuard test is intended to screen adults 45 and older at average risk for colorectal cancer. Do not use a Cologuard test if you have had adenomas, have inflammatory bowel disease and certain hereditary syndromes, or a personal family history of colorectal cancer. The Cologuard test is not a replacement for colonoscopy in high risk patients. Cologuard test performance in adults age 45 to 49 is estimated based on a large clinical study of patients 50 and older. False positives and false negatives can occur. Cologuard is available by prescription only.

[Judy Blume]

You've heard her name in the headlines during trivia nights as a punchline. Monica Lewinsky. She's been a major reference in pop culture since she was 24 years old when a scandal made her a household name overnight. Since then, she's fought to redefine her reputation, and now she's ready to use her experience to encourage others to take back their power too. On her new podcast, Reclaiming with Monica Lewinsky, Monica leads honest and wide ranging conversations about what it means to write your own narrative. Each week, guests like Olivia Munn and Alan Cumming share how they've rediscovered purpose, rebuilt relationships, and redefined success after their most vulnerable moments. A single incident can Shape how the world views someone's life. It might be a public scandal, a viral moment, a career setback, or a personal struggle. Thrust into the spotlight through raw conversations with actors, athletes, activists, and everyday people, Reclaiming explores what happens after the headlines fade and how to find your voice when the world thinks it already knows your story. Follow Reclaiming with Monica Lewinsky wherever you get your podcasts, Watch new episodes on YouTube or listen early and ad free by joining Wondery plus in the Wondery app or on Apple podcasts.

[Gretchen Rubin]

Okay, Elizabeth, it's time for demerits and gold stars. And this is an even numbered episode, which means it's your turn to talk about a demerit.

[Elizabeth Craft]

All right, Gretch. Well, Speaking of read 25 and 25, I have on my list of 25 things I want to do in 2025 reading an actual paper book every month. We were just talking about audiobooks, but I want to get back in the habit of doing some actual paper reading. And I haven't done it yet. I mean, I'm reading War and Peace every day, but I haven't read an actual book full book yet. And now we're into March, so I'm two books behind, so I've gotta get cracking on that.

[Gretchen Rubin]

Well, what is it that you feel like you wanna get from the paper book that's different from what you get from reading an audiobook?

[Elizabeth Craft]

You know, I just don't wanna lose my stamina for reading in that way. And I find the less I read an actual book, the shorter my reading stamina is. So I kinda wanna work the muscle.

[Gretchen Rubin]

And is it because when you're listening, you can be kind of active, like you're walking around and so when you're reading a book, you get a little bit restless?

[Elizabeth Craft]

Exactly. When I'm reading a book, I might put it down, check my phone, et cetera. Whereas I used to sit and read for three hours, no problem. Wouldn't even think twice about it. Now it's hard to read for 15 minutes without some sort of break. So I want to build back up.

[Gretchen Rubin]

You read a lot. So the next time you read something where you're like, oh, my gosh, I'm really turning the pages, or like, it's an audiobook, but you're finding it super compelling, switch to paper. Because maybe you could get your stamina back up by reading something that's really holding your attention. Because I think there are books that we enjoy and we're really glad that we read, but they're not like you're Racing home to get back to your book. And then there are some where you're like, oh, my gosh, I'm just dying to finish it. So maybe with those kinds of books where you really feel that and then you'll really stay engaged. Cause it's the kind of book where you're not thinking like, oh, well, maybe I should get up and, and fix myself a snack or whatever.

[Elizabeth Craft]

Yeah, that's probably a good idea. So hopefully now that I've said it, I'll do it and I can report back.

[Gretchen Rubin]

Yeah.

[Elizabeth Craft]

All right, Gretchen, what is your gold star this week?

[Gretchen Rubin]

Well, I wanna give a gold star to Jenna Bush Hagar for mentioning my one sentence journal. I had no idea that I was gonna get a spotlight on that. It's something that came out a long time ago. And so to see it somehow emerge into the public sphere was amazing. I was so happy to see that. It was very sweet because many listeners and readers took screenshots and sent them to me. I mean, at first I was like, what is this from? But it was recently.

[Elizabeth Craft]

Yeah.

[Gretchen Rubin]

So that was exciting because one of the things, as an author who has something in the past and Elizabeth, maybe you feel this way about your TV shows. It's very exciting when somebody's engaging with it in the present because you're like, yes, I love it just as much as when I did it and now it's getting that spotlight. So I want to give her a gold star because I really appreciated that.

[Elizabeth Craft]

Yes. There was this nice, beautiful, big stack of your.

[Gretchen Rubin]

It was.

[Elizabeth Craft]

And I saw it. It was a fun surprise.

[Gretchen Rubin]

I don't know if I have a good enough image of it, but if I do, I'll put it in the show notes. Now, the resource for this week, I just want to remind everybody of the tour. It's coming your way. I really want to see people there. And I'm going to a lot of cities that I've never visited before for a book tour and some cities that I've never been to before in my whole life. So I'm so excited. I always love going to a city for the first time. And again, those cities are Washington, D.C. boston, Kansas City, Missouri, of course, Lexington, Kentucky, Bloomington, Indiana. Tulsa, Oklahoma, San Diego, California, Corta, Madeira, California. Los Angeles, California. Wake Forest, Washington, Coral Gables, Florida. Miami, Florida. Tampa, Florida, New York City. It's interesting that I'm ending up in New York City. And that's [e-mail] secrets. And so I really, I'm really looking forward to it. I like meeting with people it's really fun. Oh, yeah, Elizabeth, we've talked a lot about reading today. What are you reading right now?

[Elizabeth Craft]

Well, as I mentioned before, I'm reading the God of the woods by Liz Moore.

[Gretchen Rubin]

And I am reading Stone Yard Devotional by Charlotte Wood. And that's it for this episode of Happier. Remember to try this at home. Stash that thing in the messy closet. Let us know if you tried it and if it was worked for you.

[Elizabeth Craft]

Thank you to the legendary Judy Blume. Such an extraordinary experience to get to talk to her.

[Gretchen Rubin]

Oh, yeah.

[Elizabeth Craft]

Thank you to Chuck Reed and everyone at Lemonada.

[Gretchen Rubin]

Well, you know, we were talking about word of mouth for books, but word of mouth works for podcasts as well. So rate us, review us, follow us, and if you like the show, tell others you know.

[Elizabeth Craft]

Until next week, I'm Elizabeth Craft.

[Gretchen Rubin]

And I'm Gretchen Rubin. Thanks for joining us. Onward and upward.

[Elizabeth Craft]

Gretch. If you'd said 10 years ago when we started the podcast that it would lead to us getting to meet Judy Blume, we would have done it. Just for that.

[Gretchen Rubin]

Just for that. Exactly. I know.

This message is sponsored by Cologuard. As my listeners know, increasing awareness around the importance of screening for colon cancer is a mission that is very near and dear to me. Why, you may ask? Because as a colon cancer survivor myself, I want to tell as many people as possible that early detection is crucial. When caught at early stages, colon cancer is more treatable in 90% of people. And yet colon cancer is considered the most preventable. Despite that fact, it's the least prevented cancer out there. It doesn't have to be that way. So here's an important misconception that I want to clarify, especially for people who are under 50. The American Cancer Society recommends that if you are at average risk, you should begin screening for colon cancer at age 45, not 50. 45. There are an estimated 60 million adults aged 45 plus in America who are not up to date with colon cancer screening. So help me change that by spreading the word about a new option that is convenient and affordable. The Cologuard test is a one of a kind way to feel more in control of your colon cancer screening through a prescription based test with none of the prep that's required of a colonoscopy. So if you're 45 or older and at average risk, ask your healthcare provider about screening for colon cancer with the Cologuard test. You can also request a Cologuard prescription [e-mail] podcast. The Cologuard test is intended to screen adults 45 and older at average risk for colorectal cancer. Do not use a cologuard test if you have had adenomas, have inflammatory bowel disease and certain hereditary syndromes, or a personal or family history of colorectal cancer. The cologuard test is not a replacement for colonoscopy in high risk patients. Cologuard test performance in ages 45 to 49 is estimated based on a large clinical study of patients 50 and older. False positives and false negatives can occur. Cologuard is available by prescription only.

Hi everyone, Gloria Rivera here, and we are back for another season of no One Is Coming to Save Us, a podcast about America's childcare crisis. This season, we're delving deep into five critical issues facing our country through the lens of childcare, poverty, mental health, housing, climate change and the public school system. By exploring these connections, we aim to highlight that childcare is not an isolated issue, but one that influences all facets of American life. Season 4 of No1 Is Coming to Save Us is out now. Wherever you get your podcasts.