Podcast Summary: Fail Better with David Duchovny
Episode: Fail Again: A Forensic Analysis with Emily Deschanel
Release Date: December 30, 2025
Host: David Duchovny
Guest: Emily Deschanel
Episode Overview
This candid, free-flowing conversation between David Duchovny and actress Emily Deschanel explores how failure, shame, and imperfection are not obstacles to be avoided but integral parts of growth and artistic life. Drawing on Deschanel’s twelve seasons starring in “Bones,” her advocacy for herself, and her experiences as a parent and person with ADHD/dyslexia, the episode highlights how we can “fail better”—and why vulnerability is both difficult and essential. The episode also playfully experiments with an unscripted, shuffled-interview style using index cards with random prompts, reflecting the show’s embrace of unpredictability and imperfection.
Key Discussion Points & Insights
1. Diagnosis & Learning Differences (02:55–06:17)
- Emily’s diagnosis: Diagnosed with ADHD and dyslexia at age 11. She reflects on the rarity of such diagnoses for girls at the time.
“I think a lot of people my age did not get diagnosed, especially girls...”—Emily (03:00)
- Transient childhood: Her father’s career as a cinematographer meant frequent moves (Los Angeles, San Francisco, Louisiana, Seychelles, London), leading to educational inconsistency that masked learning challenges.
“You don’t have the consistency of being at the same school where people realize, you know, something’s going on.” —Emily (04:22)
- First real support: The American School in London identified her dyslexia and provided special reading instruction.
- ADHD’s daily impact: She notes her ADHD is more of a current challenge than dyslexia; she prefers audiobooks but struggles with auditory processing.
2. The Challenge of Memorization & Technical Dialogue (06:17–09:25)
- Learning technical lines on 'Bones': Memorizing complex scientific dialogue was “a challenge,” especially first season, complicated by learning differences.
- Production agreement: On “Bones,” actors only received scripts in advance—no late-night revisions. In return, actors promised not to request last-minute rewrites (07:03).
“We kind of had a mutual agreement, which is kind of unheard of in TV.” —Emily (07:35)
- Methods for learning: Duchovny and Deschanel compare approaches: Duchovny internalizes lines silently; Deschanel must say them aloud, especially scientific terminology.
“You have to get your mouth around them. So that's shocking that you don't have to say them out loud.”—Emily (09:25)
- System & adaptation: Emily received help to run lines; over time, she built strategies to cope.
3. On Control, Perfectionism, and Embracing Mistakes (13:42–16:15)
- Letting go of control: Duchovny discusses desires to “do things well” and how this urge for control can stifle magic and spontaneity in acting and in life.
“I’m trying to let a little magic...or mistake in or something fucked up. So you’re going to be the guinea pig.” —David (14:16)
- Freedom in failure: Emily shares how her favorite acting teacher, Bill Young, once bluntly told her a performance was “shitty,” which paradoxically was liberating.
“I loved him so much more in that moment...it freed me up.” —Emily (16:14)
- Muscling through vs. self-trust: Despite appreciating honest feedback, she confesses a tendency to “muscle my way through” by over-preparing—reading countless parenting books, meditating, etc.
4. Vulnerability, Shame, and Setbacks on 'Bones' (26:03–40:14)
- Early days were overwhelming: First season, Emily was overwhelmed by workload and memorization, feeling visible pressure from the crew to get lines right.
“I would go home and just cry in a bathtub every night. I was just so overwhelmed.” —Emily (26:32)
- Panic attacks & shame: Unable to remember lines, she experienced tunnel vision and near panic attacks on set (28:00).
- Studio feedback: The showrunner, Hart Hanson, delivered devastating studio feedback that she was “late and unprepared.” She describes the emotional impact and shame.
“It was like, you are unprofessional...I'm an actor, I'm an emotional person. So I was just beside myself.”—Emily (36:34, 38:30)
- Support & adaptation: Afterward, she received support learning lines, more downtime, and a bigger trailer. Eventually, cast and crew adapted to make workloads more sustainable.
- Work ethic & misunderstanding: The accusation of unprofessionalism was particularly hurtful because it didn’t reflect her values or work ethic, inherited from her father.
5. Anxiety & Parenting in a Changing World (43:32–47:48)
- Persistent anxiety: Emily discusses how anxiety “got smaller and smaller” on set but is now intense in her personal life as a parent.
“For me as an actor, I got smaller and smaller [anxieties]. For me now as a person, I feel like my anxiety...has been insane.” —Emily (43:18)
- Raising boys: She shares concerns about raising sons in a complex culture (“boys need their moms, but they hate that they need them”).
- Balancing career & motherhood: Filming while pregnant, she was given more time off (thanks to Hart Hanson’s Canadian approach) and experienced working motherhood's challenges.
6. Success and Its Complications (51:43–54:45)
- When success hurts: Emily reflects on success complicating relationships—past partners felt threatened, and her time was consumed by work.
“That guy in particular thought I was like avoiding. I'm like I'm literally working non-stop...I'm just trying to survive.” —Emily (52:23)
- Family dynamics: No sibling rivalry with her sister Zooey Deschanel; both support each other’s achievements.
7. The Value of Failure
- Learning from failure: Both agree that failure imparts humility, vulnerability, accountability—while success can breed complacency.
“Nothing from success. Success you learn arrogance, complacency...But failure...grows your brain.” —David (57:50)
- Empathy vs. Compassion: They discuss Peter Singer’s distinction that empathy is emotionally taxing and finite, while compassion is more scalable and actionable.
“Empathy is like this emotional outreach...compassion seems more logical, a little less emotional.” —David (60:43)
8. The “Boneheads” Podcast & Self-Reflection (62:11–63:55)
- Bones rewatch: Emily and co-star Carla Gallo host “Boneheads,” a “Bones” rewatch podcast.
- Watching old work: Emily now feels empathy for her younger self: “When I would watch that before, my husband would call it hate-watching...I hate it. I hate watching myself...But now I have a lot more empathy for myself.”
- David’s take: Duchovny admits he sometimes enjoys watching himself.
Notable Quotes & Moments
- “I went to a million different schools.” —Emily (03:50)
- “You have to get your mouth around [scientific words].” —Emily (09:25)
- “I want things to be controlled...If I can just do this one thing...then it will be good.” —Emily (14:22)
- “Getting it wrong can be so much more interesting.” —David (15:00)
- “That was shitty.” —Emily, quoting her acting teacher Bill Young (16:14)
- “I would go home and just cry in a bathtub every night.” —Emily (26:32)
- “The studio is concerned about your work...they said that I was late and unprepared.” —Emily (36:33)
- “It was like, you are unprofessional....I'm an actor, I'm an emotional person. So I was just beside myself.”—Emily (36:53–38:30)
- “Empathy is like this emotional outreach...compassion seems more logical.”—David (60:43)
- “Failure makes you…I think it grows your brain; success probably shrinks it.” —David (58:12)
Memorable Moments by Timestamp
- 03:06–05:17: Emily’s transient childhood and first experience getting support for dyslexia
- 07:03–07:57: Unique actor-writer agreement on “Bones” (no last-minute script changes)
- 14:16–15:10: Duchovny’s theory on inviting mistakes into creative process
- 16:14–17:46: Emily's liberating experience with blunt acting feedback
- 26:32–38:30: Emily’s vulnerable recounting of panic, shame, and support during “Bones” season one
- 43:18–47:36: Honest discussion of anxiety as a parent and changing cultural concerns for boys
- 57:50–58:12: Discussion on what failure teaches vs. what success teaches
- 62:23–63:24: Emily’s evolving feelings about watching herself act (“hate-watching” becoming empathy)
Timestamps for Critical Segments
| Timestamp | Segment | |-----------|-----------------------------------------| | 02:55 | Emily’s diagnosis and early challenges | | 06:17 | Technical dialogue and memorization | | 14:16 | Control vs. letting failure in | | 16:14 | Impact of blunt feedback in acting | | 26:32 | Anxiety, shame, and panic attacks on set| | 36:33 | Studio confrontation and aftermath | | 43:18 | Anxiety as a parent, cultural pressures | | 47:48 | Balancing work, pregnancy & motherhood | | 51:43 | Success’s downsides | | 57:45–58:27 | Learning from failure | | 60:43 | Empathy vs. compassion | | 62:11 | “Boneheads” podcast and reflection |
Tone & Style
The conversation is intimate, honest, and self-deprecating, full of in-jokes and mutual understanding between two seasoned actors. Both host and guest openly discuss vulnerability, anxiety, artistic process, parenting, and industry pressures, with humor, humility, and warmth. Duchovny’s improvisational experiment (shuffling index cards for questions) provides spontaneity, reinforcing the show’s message that letting go and “failing better” is both productive and freeing.
Conclusion
This episode is a meaningful exploration of what it means to “fail better.” The candid exchange between Duchovny and Deschanel, punctuated by personal anecdotes, moments of self-doubt, and empathetic reflection—reminds us all that imperfection shapes not only artists but everyone. “Getting it wrong” is where the learning, the magic, and the humanity happen.