Fail Better with David Duchovny

Episode: How Steve Burns Found His Aliveness Again

Date: September 23, 2025
Guest: Steve Burns (original host of Blue’s Clues)
Host: David Duchovny

Main Theme & Purpose

This deeply reflective episode explores themes of failure, vulnerability, and rediscovery through the life and career of Steve Burns, best known as the original host of Blue’s Clues. Duchovny and Burns dig into childhood, creativity, mental health, and the struggles of public life. They discuss how embracing failure with honesty and humor—failing better, in Beckett’s words—can reveal unexpected wisdom and growth.

Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Journey Into Children’s Television and Clowning

• Steve describes his accidental entry into children's TV, believing he was attending a voiceover audition, not an on-camera role.
• The duality of his ambitions: at the time he was also up for a role on Homicide, representing a “fork in the road” (04:53).
• Steve draws a philosophical parallel between Beckett’s absurdism, clowning, and the art of children’s television:
  • Quote (Steve Burns, 09:59):
    “It was the sense of the absurd that I already knew rhymed with my worldview. Endgame is my favorite Beckett play. It’s funny, and I thought it was hilarious. Yeah. And profoundly painful and dark.”
• Blue’s Clues success was built around the patience, listening, and real vulnerability that Steve brought to the job—attributes unusual in children’s programming.

2. Mental Health and Authenticity in Performance

• Throughout his Blue’s Clues tenure, Steve suffered undiagnosed severe clinical depression (16:07). The job demanded daily outward exuberance and self-esteem, even as he struggled internally.
  • Quote (Steve Burns, 16:07):
    “The entire time I was on that kid's TV show…it was all about empowerment and curiosity and wonder, and I was dealing with undiagnosed, severe clinical depression the entire time.”
• Duchovny suggests that Steve’s vulnerability made him more trustworthy and real for children, as opposed to the “mask” like characters (e.g., Barney) where the humanity is missing (18:01).
  • Quote (David Duchovny, 18:01):
    "I think because…you were in touch with that part of yourself, I think that's why you were so good at your job, because I think you were trustworthy to children."

3. Quitting, Failure, and Reinvention

• Steve discusses why he left Blue’s Clues after five years: undercompensation, burnout, lack of support for his well-being, and a growing inability to conjure the emotional energy the job required (25:07, 26:45).
  • He reframes “quitting” as an act that can be both necessary and empowering, challenging the stigma of failure that quitting carries in American culture.
• After tragedy—the death of his father and personal upheaval—Steve reached out for help in his own life, mirroring what he had always performed on TV: “Will you help me?” (27:55).
  • Quote (Steve Burns, 27:55):
    “In every episode…I would sit in a chair and look at someone in the eyes and say, will you help me? And it wasn’t until I did that in my three dimensional human life that things changed.”

4. Lessons from Children’s Television and ‘Blue’s Clues’

• Steve reflects on the deep design behind Blue’s Clues: the importance of waiting, practicing silence, and treating the child’s response as essential (31:45, 33:12).
  • The show was built so the main character often failed and needed the audience’s help, modeling healthy responses to failure, collaboration, and resilience.
  • Quote (Steve Burns, 20:08):
    “I was constantly failing…I would fail and the kids would save me…but at the core of the show, I would ask for help: ‘Will you help me?’”
• Discussion on childhood as an endless series of failures and recoveries—the true work of children, and why shame should have no place (36:13).
  • Quote (Steve Burns, 37:18):
    “There is no shame in failing until you learn to feel shame in failing.”

5. Identity, Imposter Syndrome and Rediscovery

• Steve shares his struggle with imposter syndrome—feeling “wildly miscast” even in enormous success.
• Only with time and distance has he been able to see the profound value in what he did, and actually feel pride in “Steve from Blue’s Clues” (31:47, 39:22).
  • Quote (Steve Burns, 31:47):
    “Now I love that dude, you know, he's become like a real teacher…of me personally.”
• Recounts the catharsis and healing that followed his viral “shoutout” video during the pandemic, reestablishing a bond with the audience that had grown up with him (56:03, 56:21):
  • Quote (Steve Burns, 56:21):
    “One of the things I said was, ‘I never forgot you,’ you know, and they said, ‘we never forgot you’…It was really healing.”

6. The Internet, Fame, and the Impact of Rumors

• Steve describes the surreal, painful experience of the false rumors of his death—stemming initially from “corrupting something pure”—and how 15 years of this affected his identity and mental health (47:54, 51:01).
  • Quote (Steve Burns, 51:01):
    “Eventually, I, somewhere secret, believed that it was true in meaningful ways…that the version of me that I was supposed to be died.”
• He offers deep insight into the social harm of online trolling, especially for those with public profiles, and the real consequences for mental well-being.

7. The Power of Listening and Silence

• Steve’s now-famous “quiet, calming videos” and his new podcast, Alive, emphasize deep listening, patience, and presence as antidotes to the distractions and antagonisms of online life (44:39, 45:55).
  • Quote (Steve Burns, 45:55):
    “We have a responsibility to fragile human souls. I believe that. And we need to humanize this experience because it’s going to swallow us whole.”

Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• On Performance and Failure:
  “I always said I was an accidental educator. You know, all of everything I did was just in service of a curriculum…I was enormously proud to be a part of it.”
  — Steve Burns (06:09)

• On Vulnerability:
  “There's a cost…when the contours of your job involve providing self esteem to America's children, and you don't have your own approval that day.”
  — Steve Burns (16:49)

• On the Power of Asking for Help:
  “It wasn’t until I did that in my three dimensional human life that things changed.”
  — Steve Burns (27:55)

• On Online Harm:
  “You’re part of a Voltron of mean at that point…People would rather die physically than socially.”
  — Steve Burns (53:33-53:48)

• On Connection:
  “It was so emotional because I thought, oh, my God, they know I’m here and they’re happy. I get emotional thinking about it. It was really healing.”
  — Steve Burns (56:03-56:21)

Timestamps for Important Segments

• [04:18] — Steve’s lack of interest in children’s TV, accidental audition, and getting “beaten out” of actorly pretensions.
• [07:57] — Influences: Sesame, Fred Rogers, Peanuts, and clowning.
• [09:59] — First encounter with Beckett, absurdism, and finding resonance in darkness and humor.
• [16:07] — On performing joy and curiosity while battling depression.
• [20:08] — The show’s structure: failure, engagement, and asking for help.
• [27:55] — Personal breaking point, father’s death, and asking for help in real life.
• [31:45–33:12] — The craft of listening, the practice of silence, and engaging children as collaborators.
• [36:13–37:52] — Childhood as a constant process of failing and learning; the origins of shame.
• [47:54] — The 15-year death rumor, stages of reaction, and internalizing online narratives.
• [53:33] — The social psychology of internet cruelty and the collective impact of negative comments.
• [56:03–56:21] — The viral “I never forgot you” video and its emotional healing.

Flow & Tone

The conversation is candid, warm, occasionally wry, and often philosophical. Duchovny and Burns share a literary mindset (with mutual nods to Beckett), and their tone is one of gentle vulnerability. They move fluidly from childhood, art, and humor to pain, mental health, and the perils of navigating public identity.

Conclusion

Steve Burns’s story is a meditation on the costs and triumphs of authenticity: failing, often painfully, but “failing better”—and how vulnerability, silence, and curiosity can transform not only children’s lives but also our own. His journey from accidental educator to someone who found “aliveness again” is both deeply personal and universally resonant.

For fans of Blue’s Clues, those struggling with imposter syndrome, grappling with failure, or seeking new purposes after loss, this episode offers solace, insight, and a gentle reminder to listen, help, and be deeply, curiously human.