Financial Audit's First Affair

Summary

Financial Audit: "Financial Audit's First Affair"

Podcast: Financial Audit
Host: Caleb Hammer
Guests: Alyssa (20), Ethan (21)
Release Date: February 2, 2026

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Episode Overview

This episode of Financial Audit dives into the finances—and the underlying relationship and trust issues—of a young couple, Alyssa and Ethan, from Fort Worth, Texas. Host Caleb Hammer leads a raw, penetrating, and sometimes sharply humorous examination into the couple's spending habits, income, debt, and communication, quickly uncovering a broader story about codependency, lack of financial awareness, and mounting emotional tension. What begins as a financial intervention rapidly exposes the cracks in Alyssa and Ethan’s partnership, as well as problems unique to their household—like raising Ethan’s teenage brothers, reckless spending, misaligned goals, and secret OnlyFans subscriptions.

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

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Background & Introductions (00:50–03:00)

• Alyssa works 40 hours a week in retail ($18.50/hr) and 20–25 hours as a barista ($10/hr + tips), netting about $3,400/mo.
• Ethan works 32 hours/week in a retail warehouse ($16/hr), netting around $1,800/mo, with some variation.
• Combined income is ~$5,200/mo, which Caleb notes is "pretty powerful" for their age.

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Household & Relationship Dynamics (03:00–08:20)

• Alyssa feels she is "raising a man child" and carrying the adult responsibilities.
  • Alyssa: “I know when my bills are. I know what all I owe...and I have to remind him.” (08:20)
• Ethan admits Alyssa is better at money management and budgeting, but finds her controlling.
• The couple does not share bank accounts and frequently miscommunicate about finances and even each other's schedules.
• Caleb exposes their divergent mindsets—Alyssa is future- and position-oriented, Ethan is present-focused.

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Bills, Budgeting, and Broken Communication (08:20–15:00)

• Alyssa is frustrated at having to monitor Ethan’s bill payments (Amazon card, etc.) and consider consolidating accounts just to keep things afloat.
• Ethan is vague on payment timelines and balances, confirming Alyssa’s suspicions he’s not proactive—even admitting, “I don’t really care about looking at the number…” (16:01)
• Alyssa suspects Ethan’s financial flakiness stems from a privileged upbringing; Ethan says his dad restricted his spending but continues to pay for some expenses.

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Enabling, Blame, and Mutual Sabotage (19:26–23:45)

• Caleb calls out both for throwing each other under the bus—Ethan labels Alyssa “enabling,” Alyssa calls Ethan an “instigator,” but both admit to excessive discretionary spending.
• Their actual spending undermines their perceived financial improvement:
  • “You guys are both the villain. You’re spending 70% of your household income on you. Bullshit.” (28:45)

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Catastrophic Overspending & The Real Numbers (21:19–30:45)

• Actual monthly spend:
  • Going out to eat: $946.87
  • Miscellaneous/untracked: $2,659.43
  • Total known discretionary spending: $3,606.30
• Outflow last month: $6,411.17—$1,200 more than they earn.
• Neither Alyssa nor Ethan can accurately estimate their own spending:
  • “You guys can’t guess shit to save your lives.” (30:38)

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Raising Ethan’s Brothers & Added Pressure (37:03–40:18)

• Alyssa and Ethan are caretakers for Ethan’s two teenage brothers (13 and 14), whose parents are absent.
• The boys’ biological father lives in a motel, and the arrangement lacks long-term stability.
• Caleb warns: “You guys are in a scary situation and you’re going further into debt. You spend more than you make, and 70% of it’s on bullshit. So I don’t want to hear that. So what they need is security. Do you have a fully funded emergency fund?” (41:18)

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Debt, Payments, and Excuses (42:45–54:10)

• Multiple credit cards (Discover, Capital One, Best Buy, Amazon, Klarna, Affirm) all carry balances, many accrue interest, some have late payments or fees.
• Alyssa repeatedly claims to “never spend” on her credit cards—but then gets caught in the act:
  • “You said you don’t spend on the credit card. Well, she did, and she doesn’t know what it’s for. How could she possibly say those things?” (43:10)
• Caleb: “Liar. Liar. Dude, I literally have the charges right here. And this is your most recent month, so I don’t want to hear it. What the f are you talking about?” (47:45)
• Most purchases, even large ones like concerts, trips, and groceries, are lumped onto credit cards.
• Minimum payments alone will stretch their repayment timelines to 12–13 years, if they stop new spending—unlikely, given the pattern.
• Multiple “buy now, pay later” arrangements (Affirm, Klarna) indicate short-term thinking.

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Sex, Intimacy & Emotional Drift (73:54–78:14)

• Alyssa feels rejected sexually; Ethan rarely wants intimacy and she internalizes it as unattractiveness.
  • Alyssa: “Do you not think I’m attractive? Do you think I’m fat? Do you think I’m ugly?” (22:22 and again at 74:23)
• Ethan: “Not in the mood…in past relationships, that has been the main focus. That’s the last thing I think about.”
• Caleb provides sex-positive advice and suggests exploring other forms of intimacy, but points to financial and emotional stress as the probable reason for reduced sex drive.

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Reveal: OnlyFans and Secret Spending (86:05–94:58)

• Alyssa discovers Ethan has (contrary to his word) been “subscribing a ton” to OnlyFans and similar fan sites, even while declining intimacy at home.
• Caleb exposes: “He is gooning a lot. And I think what we have here more than anything is a relationship issue that needs to be worked on in therapy before we think about the finances." (93:59)
• Alyssa is devastated, realizing Ethan has been lying about his activities and expenditures:
  • “Why would you lie to me about that when you don’t even want to be with me?” (87:51)

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Final Assessment & Next Steps

• Caleb refuses to proceed with a normal financial budget intervention.
  • “There is more to work with, because in August alone, he purchased [multiple] fan subscriptions…have you guys seen a couple therapist?”
• He recommends couples therapy “with a focus on sex,” offers to pay for two sessions, and assigns them to a budgeting expert.
• Caleb reiterates: “You guys are not able to budget and focus…you need to sit down with a couple therapist…before you can think about the money.” (95:11)

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Standout Quotes & Memorable Moments

• Caleb (on spending):
  “You’re spending 70% of your household income on you. Bullshit. Contributing nothing. Just fun slop.” (28:45)
• Caleb (to Alyssa):
  “You started with ‘I never spend. I look at my statements every day.’ How can you say you don’t know what’s happening about a charge that you said never had?” (43:10)
• Alyssa (on being the adult):
  “I have to mother him a little bit, because I want to make sure that stuff gets done because I don’t want it sitting on me the rest of my life.” (69:10)
• Caleb (on relationship health):
  “More than anything, have you guys seen a couple therapist? ...I want you guys to have a good life together... we will focus on a budget at some point, but more than anything I want you to focus on healing this relationship.” (94:58)
• Caleb (on OnlyFans spending):
  “He is subscribing to multiple OnlyFans accounts multiple times a month. He’s gooning a lot. And I think what we have here is a relationship issue.” (93:59)
• Alyssa (devastated):
  “All the reassurance you do means nothing. You saying you’re just not in the mood, or you’re stressed, or you’re tired, means nothing. That means you’re lying to me.” (89:02)

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Key Timestamps

| Segment/Class | Description | Timestamp | | --- | --- | --- | | Income breakdown | Alyssa and Ethan’s jobs, net income | 00:50–03:00 | | Relationship roles | Alyssa confesses “raising a man child” | 03:19 | | Communication gaps | Disagreement over work hours | 04:50–05:32 | | Divided finances | Separate accounts, Alyssa doing the budgeting | 08:20–09:46 | | Enabling & blame | Both accusing each other | 19:26–21:19 | | Real spending numbers | Caleb reveals true outflows | 21:19–28:45 | | Raising Ethan’s brothers | Caretaking, family instability | 37:03–40:18 | | Credit cards & lies | Alyssa claims no card debt, gets caught | 42:45–54:10 | | Sex & intimacy issues | Emotional/sexual disconnect | 73:54–78:14 | | OnlyFans spending is revealed | Financial & emotional cheating exposed | 86:05–94:58 | | Caleb recommends therapy | No financial fix before relationship work | 94:58 |

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Summary Table: Financial Health

| Category | Details | |-----------------------|------------------------------------------------------| | Combined Net Income | ~$5,200/mo ($62,400/yr) | | Debt | Multiple credit cards, lease, BNPL; all maxed | | Discretionary Spend | ~$3,600/mo (70% of income; mostly food, ‘junk’) | | Communication | Poor, secretive, and mutually accusatory | | Children in Care | Ethan’s teen brothers; added pressure | | Sex/Intimacy | Significant, unresolved issues | | Trust | Broken (OnlyFans, secret spending, lying) | | Savings/Emergency | None; negative balances, paycheck advances | | Therapy Needed? | YES—Caleb will sponsor initial sessions |

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Tone and Takeaways

This was an unvarnished, highly personal, and often uncomfortable session, with Caleb wielding dark humor to keep things moving. Both Alyssa and Ethan admit to mismanaging money and blaming each other; trust is deeply compromised due to lies about finances and intimacy. The couple’s future—both personally and financially—is precarious unless they radically reorganize both their communication and their spending. Caleb’s core prescription is not just budgeting, but couple’s therapy: their survival as a relationship hinges on radical honesty, transparency, and mutual support—far more than on which card to cut or points to chase.

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If you haven’t heard the episode, this summary captures the rollercoaster—financial and emotional—of Alyssa and Ethan’s young, troubled union, masterfully dissected (and roasted) by Caleb Hammer.

Transcript

[Caleb]

To watch episodes of Financial Audit a week earlier. Check us out on YouTube. I hear that you're literally having to take care of a man child and raise him.

[Alyssa]

I don't see him pulling out his wallet for that.

[Ethan]

It's a credit card.

[Alyssa]

Okay. Is that not money that I still have to pay back?

[Caleb]

Always throwing people under the bus for the exact stuff you do.

[Alyssa]

No, because I don't what I'm saying. Hold on.

[Ethan]

So you can cut me off, but I can't cut you off?

[Alyssa]

It's been almost a month.

[Caleb]

Since what? Since anything.

[Alyssa]

And then before that, it was almost a month. Do you not think I'm attractive? Do you think I'm fat? Do you think I'm ugly?

[Caleb]

No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. He's spending a ton on Only. Hammer Elite is the best YouTube membership on the platform. And for the rest of the month, I am paying for you to sign up. Sign up for Hammer Elite in the description or pin comment below and submit proof of purchase@hammer elite.com.

[Alyssa]

Hi, my name is Alyssa. I'm 20 years old.

[Ethan]

My name is Ethan. I'm 21 years old. And we're from Fort Worth, Texas.

[Alyssa]

And this is Financial Audit.

[Caleb]

Yes, it is. Thanks for coming down. From Dallas, Fort Worth to Austin, Texas. Happy to have you guys here. Lissa, you're the one right in front of me, so let me start with you. What do you do for a living in Fort Worth?

[Alyssa]

I work at a retail store, and I also, on the side, work as a barista at a coffee shop.

[Caleb]

What's. Yes, we know. And retail. What's your position at retail?

[Alyssa]

I do sales. Retail sales.

[Caleb]

Okay. I mean, what's retail sales?

[Alyssa]

I sell items in a retail store. Like, I don't.

[Caleb]

What capacity? There's a lot. There's actual sales, and then there's sales.

[Alyssa]

So I don't get paid, like, commission.

[Caleb]

Okay. What do you make?

[Alyssa]

18.50 an hour.

[Caleb]

Huh. And how many hours a week are you getting from that?

[Alyssa]

40.

[Caleb]

Now you are 20. I'm not going to criticize having any of these jobs by any means. Not at all. What hits your account per paycheck cycle.

[Alyssa]

For that job after my health insurance, like, a thousand.

[Caleb]

And what's that? Paycheck cycle.

[Alyssa]

Bi weekly.

[Caleb]

2,000 bucks a month. Okay. And barista job, which I would trust. Your. They. Them. Latte. I would be very excited.

[Alyssa]

I make a good latte. I make a good latte.

[Caleb]

We know. That's what I'm saying. What do you. How many hours a week are you Working in that.

[Alyssa]

What do you make average of about 20 to 25. So it's $10 an hour plus tips.

[Caleb]

Plus. Okay.

[Ethan]

Okay, cool.

[Caleb]

And what hits your paycheck per paycheck cycle there typically? Average.

[Alyssa]

Average. About 700.

[Caleb]

So you're working your ass off. I work about 700 every other week.

[Alyssa]

Yeah.

[Caleb]

Okay.

[Alyssa]

I work about 67 hours between both jobs. Average. Average.

[Caleb]

You're grinding so much. Why are you grinding so much with nothing to show for it? 3400 is what hits your account on a monthly basis, by the way. Which by the way, not. I mean, for Fort Worth, 40,000. 41,000 net at 20. I'm not at all complaining with the amount of hours you're working. Sure, it's a grind, but I'm not at all complaining at that. At your age.

[Alyssa]

I mean, it definitely because I had a higher paying job, like out of, like right out of high school, that it kind of sucks because I was working less hours, but I was getting paid more. So that sucks.

[Caleb]

That kind of sucks, sure. But like, you're grinding right now.

[Alyssa]

I am.

[Caleb]

Why are things.

[Alyssa]

Um, I don't know. I just like a little fun. Like a little.

[Caleb]

A little fun. Well, I hear that you're literally having to take care of a man child and raise him from your own words is what you told my producer. Which is the only thing I read on this list before I come in because I come in blind to the audience. But it literally says, she said. She told me she has to raise her man child boyfriend. And you're out there grinding 60 hours a week or so to raise him.

[Alyssa]

He does work around the house.

[Caleb]

Oh, so now that you're on camera, you're like, okay, let me defend him a little.

[Alyssa]

Yeah, I definitely. Because he works an average of about 32 hours a week.

[Caleb]

Doing what? What do you do?

[Ethan]

I work in retail. I work in the warehouse section of retail.

[Caleb]

Okay. And what do you work at the same time in this position?

[Ethan]

16.

[Caleb]

What hits your pay? Your paycheck? About 16 years.

[Ethan]

1000 bi weekly. It's like 900 to 1000 at least.

[Alyssa]

From what I.

[Ethan]

You have to pay for health insurance. I don't.

[Alyssa]

Yeah.

[Caleb]

You're on your parents.

[Ethan]

Yes.

[Alyssa]

When we were talking about like our average paychecks before, it was like 8 to 900, sometimes 7. Yeah, because they cut his hours a little bit recently.

[Ethan]

Yeah, they only cut. They cut my hours for this past schedule because we were over labor.

[Alyssa]

But it's like, I see it as like, can they just. They can't just Send you home all the time. Like, they can't just always send me home.

[Ethan]

They don't send me home. They'll just cut my hours, like, whenever I was at work.

[Caleb]

Wait, how do you guys not even know this? This is the beginning of the conversation. How are you guys not even aligned on this if this is literally happening?

[Alyssa]

I'm never home, so sometimes I don't know when he's home. I mean, yeah, like, I can check his location if I want to, but sometimes I don't know when he works.

[Caleb]

Chicken location. It's a different perspective on the hours that he is working and why and how you guys are already disagreeing about that. How?

[Alyssa]

I just don't look like I feel like who's right. I feel like I'm right. Like, I feel like. Like I don't know when he's home all the time, but I know what days he works, and I know what days he doesn't work because he has the same days off every week. So if he has the same days off every week and he's working the same shifts every week, how does he not have the same hours?

[Caleb]

I can already tell this is a dynamic conversation between both of you. That's what the focus is here. Because, I mean, I immediately have this. Alyssa is convinced she's the only functional adult in the relationship. Through the conversation you had with Colton, your lip is shaking. Oh, she's nervous. Well, Ethan is convinced that Alyssa's controlling, dramatic. It needs to relax.

[Alyssa]

Need to relax.

[Caleb]

I mean, these are what you guys said independently to our producer, Colon. Now, Colton, Now, I know you guys are sitting here. Oh, we're in front of the camera for the first time. I get a little nervous, so I get it. You know, these are people from the audience, and you can be too, @caleb.com apply and you guys are next to each other. It's not just a private phone call with Colton anymore. Little nervous, if that's what you're saying. Behind the scenes, it seems like out of the gate. The dynamic in this relationship is. I don't know how we deal with anything financially if, like, we have someone that thinks they're adult running the show and you think that that person who thinks she's the adult running the show is actually a controlling. I mean, what the is going on here, guys?

[Ethan]

So my. My hours are mostly consistent.

[Caleb]

That's not what I'm talking about. I'm talking about the dynamics that you guys said and laid out to Colton before you guys came on. The dynamics in this relationship. The adult Versus the.

[Alyssa]

Because the reason I feel like that is that, like, I am working my ass off. Like I'm working almost 70 hours a week.

[Caleb]

Yeah.

[Alyssa]

Because I want to be able to. I want to be able to put myself in a better position and. Hold on.

[Caleb]

That's telling yourself. Not you guys. Yourself, yourself. This is. We're not approaching this as a couple. Are we married?

[Alyssa]

No.

[Caleb]

How long have we been dating?

[Ethan]

Year and a half.

[Caleb]

Okay. So yourself and we want to.

[Alyssa]

We want to be married.

[Caleb]

Sure. But you just said yourself. That is telling. Did you hear that?

[Alyssa]

Because she's not thinking as a couple.

[Caleb]

She's not thinking as a future together. She's thinking herself.

[Alyssa]

I think of when I think of myself, like, it's not just myself in the sense of I'm only taking care of myself because I also.

[Caleb]

Oh, that's what you said.

[Alyssa]

I. I combine it as, like, I want to get myself in a better position because I also want him to be in a better position as well. Like, I have to be able to work on myself as well.

[Caleb]

Okay. That's an interesting cope. Rollback right there. To try to look better. What? That's not even an answer. That's not what I want to do better for myself. So he's better for himself.

[Alyssa]

Yeah. Because you have to be better. You have to be.

[Caleb]

Yes.

[Alyssa]

You have to be a good partner.

[Caleb]

If you're working on yourself.

[Alyssa]

Well, you have to be good individually to also be good for someone else.

[Caleb]

Okay. Potentially. But I don't think that's where you were going, if we're being honest. Until I called out how you said the language that you used. But either way, you say you're the only functioning adult in the relationship. Tell me about that.

[Alyssa]

Well, because I like, I know when my bills are. I know what my bills are. I know what all I owe. I know when it's going to come out and I have to like, remind him or like, ask him. Do you know when this is coming out? Are you paying on your Amazon car? Are you paying on this card? Are you making sure all of your bills are paid?

[Caleb]

So it is like being a mother A little bit.

[Alyssa]

A little bit, yeah.

[Caleb]

That's draining. That would be upsetting. She has to mother you for you to grow up and stand up in this household and be a contributor to the relationship. Especially guys. Especially if you guys are looking to get married. You need her to mother you.

[Ethan]

I mean, has gotten a lot better than it. It was before.

[Caleb]

Huh. Is what every guess in the history of the world says. How about let's actually talk about what's going on. She feels like she has to mother you. And in fact direct crow is she says that she feels like she babysits you. So talk about that. Not the. It's got a lot better. Cause that's the ultimate deflection that every guest used when they're being challenged on something that is actually going on in the feelings of another person where she herself is saying that she feels like she has to mother you, babysit you. No, it got a lot better. That is not the response. Face the actual reality.

[Ethan]

I mean she does. She does definitely have to. Why in certain aspects.

[Caleb]

Just why? Why you accept that.

[Alyssa]

Stupid answers for.

[Ethan]

200 I don't really know. Honestly.

[Caleb]

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[Ethan]

She's, she's better when it comes to, to understanding money and like, you know, budgeting and all that.

[Alyssa]

That's why sometimes like I think about because we don't have like one checking account. Like we both have our own checking accounts. That that's why I ask him all the time, has this come out yet? Has this come out yet? Are you going to need money for this? Do you have money for that? Um. And so I'm like, like, would it be beneficial for us to just have one checking account so I can take care of all of it? But then I think should I really have to take care of all of it? I mean like, should she really have.

[Caleb]

To take care of all of it?

[Ethan]

No, she shouldn't.

[Caleb]

Why do you allow it?

[Alyssa]

Like I went through why do you allow one day.

[Caleb]

Why do you tell me.

[Alyssa]

I went through his mail one day because he was out of town on a work trip for a separate. Not with the retail company. He was doing some side work. And I checked the mail and I found his Amazon payment had come in and I opened it and it said he had a late payment.

[Caleb]

Bruh, the is going on with you?

[Ethan]

Well, so, okay, so what? I showed her, but he told me.

[Alyssa]

That he made the payment.

[Ethan]

Yeah, so it was. I paid it because on the statement it showed it was like, what, the second or the third or something.

[Alyssa]

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[Caleb]

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[Alyssa]

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[Ethan]

That it came in, but I paid it before the statement came in. Before the.

[Alyssa]

He said he doesn't have access to, like, his Amazon account.

[Ethan]

No, I have access to it now because before I. It wasn't letting me make an account.

[Alyssa]

Like it said at the. He said at the time that he didn't have access to his Amazon account to make the payment.

[Ethan]

So.

[Caleb]

But were you not making payments before?

[Ethan]

Okay, so I was making payments, but when she sent me that I had made the payment before, but then I was trying to log in to show her that I had made the payment and I was. I don't. I didn't have, like a user ID at the time for the synchrony bank or whatever they go to.

[Alyssa]

So she was paying it as a guest. But I don't get how you pay it as a guest because all you.

[Ethan]

Had to do was just. You had to enter in your card information and that was it. It was your card information and then the last four of your social.

[Caleb]

Okay, well, listen, here's the fact. She's wondering if she needs to take extra control by combining checking accounts to extra baby because she is seeing that you are not able to take care of things behind the scenes. And we're talking marriage playoffs. Don't talk about playoffs. You kidding me? Playoffs. What she told Colton specifically is that she's been in relationships like this before and never wanted to do it again. How is marriage even on the possible future? How is it even in the possible future? And if she has vowed to never go through this again and you're Taking her through the mud again.

[Alyssa]

And I do really want to get married. Like, I wanted to get married at like, two or three years, and we're already approaching, like, our two year. But he says, I want to get married when we're financially stable, when we have money to do it. And I'm like, so what are we going to do to do it? Like, yeah, I get, you know, I have my own habits. He has in his own habits. But, like, if I, like, feel like I have to go through his mail to make sure that he's making a payment that he says he's making. Because I just. I had a thing. I was like. Because he would say, yeah, tell me. He said, I have a balance of $700 on my card, or I have a balance of $600 on my card. I'm like, why is the balance changing? If you say you're not spending on it, why is the balance changing? Like, why do you suddenly owe $100 less? But, you know, interest is also a thing.

[Caleb]

What do you think it is? Lies or ignorance?

[Alyssa]

I just think he doesn't know.

[Caleb]

So ignorant.

[Alyssa]

Because I check my statements every day. I check my statements every day. I check my Discover card every day. Like, I know.

[Caleb]

How do we correct the lack of no if he doesn't give a. Is he showing any effort to try to correct the lack of no?

[Ethan]

I mean, I have what I.

[Caleb]

She had to go through your mail to find out.

[Ethan]

I. I do look at it. I don't look at. I wouldn't say I look at it as does, like, how she looks at her statements. I'll look at my statement, like, when I pay it. And then I'm like, okay, I'll need to pay it by, like, I know my Amazon card is the second of each month, so I'm like, okay, I have, you know, until the second to pay it. And then when I look at it, I'm like, okay, I have $40 to pay next month, and then I'll pay it.

[Alyssa]

But it's like, like I said, I always know how much money is on my cards because I check it literally every day. And I'm not saying you have to check it every day, but, like, you're telling me almost every time that we talk about it that the balance is different. Like, so unless you're either getting something on it, then you're not telling me, or you're just not being honest about it. Like, how does that just change?

[Ethan]

I mean, there. Other than the, that late payment, that's the only thing that has changed because I don't use the card anymore.

[Alyssa]

So then why can't you give me an exact number when I ask what the balance is?

[Ethan]

Because I don't look at the number because I know to me what, I don't really care about looking at the number because like I'm at the paid anyways. So as long as I know how much I have to pay and when I have to pay it, then.

[Alyssa]

So like this is what I'm talking about though. Like how I've said I make a 300 payment here or I make a bigger payment here. Like you know the minimum payment you have to make. But how do you, how do you plan on paying it off in less than however long it's going to take just making your $48 payment without like, oh, I need to make a bigger payment here. I have extra money to make a bigger payment here Because I don't, I.

[Ethan]

Don'T always just make the minimum payment.

[Alyssa]

Yeah, we used to do auto pay on your cards and then you used to have to dispute the auto pay because you didn't have enough money to do it.

[Caleb]

Oh my gosh. Why do you think he has the lack of care into investigating and finding out kind of what's going on?

[Alyssa]

I feel like we grew up very different financially. Like, his dad makes so much money.

[Caleb]

So he grew up rich.

[Alyssa]

Pretty much. Pretty much grew up with a lot of money. I grew up like my parents were really lucky that the house we lived in because we're not from Texas, so the their house was a lot cheaper.

[Caleb]

Texas is pretty cheap.

[Alyssa]

But $600 a month for a three story house on two acres of land?

[Caleb]

Well, it depends when you buy, but sure.

[Alyssa]

I mean, they rented.

[Caleb]

Okay, well either way. Okay, so you had the, My parents.

[Alyssa]

Would struggle with that.

[Caleb]

Yeah, struggle with the $600 month payment. That's pretty brutal. So you grew up rich and privileged, so now you're not actually looking to shit so you don't have to fight for anything.

[Ethan]

When I was growing up, my dad, he wouldn't let me, like with my own personal paychecks I would get. He wouldn't let me buy anything that I wanted. So boo. I feel like.

[Caleb]

Wait, your own personal paychecks? How old were you?

[Ethan]

16, 17. I was working my own job.

[Alyssa]

I got my first job when I was 14.

[Ethan]

Even when we were like when we first started dating, my dad would not let me spend my money.

[Caleb]

And what is it? What does that mean?

[Ethan]

Like, he wouldn't let, like he wouldn't let me spend Money on things that I wanted. Like if I wanted to go.

[Caleb]

What are you asking for? What were you trying to do? What do you mean he wouldn't let you. How would he not let you?

[Ethan]

If I wanted to go get a new pair of shoes or something, I would come home and I would get $2,000.

[Alyssa]

Building your PC?

[Ethan]

Yeah, but that was over the span of like a year. That wasn't.

[Caleb]

Yeah, but that is a shit ton of money. When working like a part time minimum wage job in high school, if I.

[Ethan]

Would go and get like shoes or something, he would yell at me about spending you know, 100 something dollars on shoes. And I'm like it's my money.

[Caleb]

Well sure, your money. But maybe trying to teach discipline and.

[Alyssa]

Budgeting bought everything for him though. Like that's what I'm talking about. Like his dad, his dad still pays for some of his stuff, which don't get me wrong, like my mom still pays for some of my stuff here and there.

[Caleb]

Compared to your ages, I don't have a problem with that. But it is enablement or the lack of learning things. Maybe he was trying to teach you that you need to actually value money. You shouldn't just blow it all and you should says I'm inside. Yeah, well what was he trying to say? What was he saying?

[Ethan]

He, he was literally just say you need to stop spending money. And that was.

[Caleb]

Was it correct?

[Ethan]

Yeah.

[Caleb]

Well there you go.

[Ethan]

In the grand scheme of things it was looking back at it.

[Caleb]

So why, how are you taking that? You're using that as a cope for why you're now.

[Ethan]

Well, I think because that's what you.

[Caleb]

Brought up the guy.

[Ethan]

Part of the way I look at it is if I have, if I have the money to pay for the stuff that I need to pay for and then if I have some remaining money over then I'm gonna spend it.

[Alyssa]

But he does that. But he also doesn't like he's not saving anything. Like yes, I do the same thing to an extent but I have, I have a savings and how are we.

[Caleb]

Getting to a marriage if we're so disconnected in our goals and what we want to do? I just hope we can win a game. I understand different backgrounds so that's okay. But you guys are coming one into a partnership. How are we even going to get that? I mean she calls you an instigator enabling her blames, but you blame her for enabling your. So he blames you. By the way, he blamed you to Colton for enabling his spending.

[Alyssa]

I don't feel Like, I enable the spending. I feel like we both spend. Like, he can go buy stuff on his games. I don't tell him to buy stuff on his games.

[Caleb]

Why do you say that? Why'd you say that? The Colton that she enables you to spend.

[Ethan]

I think what. What we said was that it's more of if. If she wants. Like, if we want to go out and do something. Like, she pays for one thing, I pay for one thing, and then if.

[Alyssa]

But how is that enabling if we're splitting it?

[Ethan]

Well, like, some other stuff.

[Alyssa]

Like that be me saying I'm gonna have you pay for all of this, and it's not coming out of my bank account, but it still affects us. Like, we live together. Like, we pay the same bills. Like, how is that. How is that enabling if, like, we agree to go do something? Like, you asked me if I want to go see the five nights at Freddy's movie.

[Caleb]

Yeah, I'm not saying we can't do anything. I'm not trying to say that at all. But again, we're throwing each other under the bus. You call them an instigator. You call her enabling, spending your money. Not saying we can't do anything. I'm not saying we shouldn't treat ourselves here and there, especially within a budget. I mean, okay, combined household income for you guys right now, net, we got the 3400 from Elise and 1800 from Ethan. That's $5200 a month. It's not half bad. At our ages, that's certainly not even close to bad. I'd say that a pretty powerful position. $62,400 a year. You're in that median for the area. In terms of net income, you guys ain't doing half bad. Well, we're not aligned at all.

[Alyssa]

It's just like. That's what sucks to think about sometimes, is like, that sounds like a good number.

[Ethan]

It is.

[Alyssa]

It sounds like a great number.

[Caleb]

It's well above your age.

[Alyssa]

Like, again, I'm working, like, almost 70 hours a week.

[Caleb]

Okay, 70 hours a week for what? What does the household spend going out to eat? Last month, I mean, we kind of.

[Ethan]

Died down going out to 200 maybe.

[Caleb]

But it's interesting how he keeps saying they've gotten better when I have the numbers literally right in front of them. Dumbass.

[Ethan]

I mean, we have, like, we used to go out to eat, like, every day, Ethan, about 200, but before is way worse.

[Alyssa]

200, okay.

[Caleb]

Yeah, it was $946.87. What the are you talking about? What the are you talking about? Let's stop pulling out of my ass. An accountant looked through your numbers and made the spreadsheet for me. What the you on about? Got better. You don't know what the you're talking about because you don't look at. She said you don't look at. She had to go into the mail to look at your. Because you don't look at your. You can't say 200. I don't know how you said 200. You say you look at your. But combined as a household, it was nearly not. It was nearly so.

[Alyssa]

I do feel like I. Like, I have recently started eating out more than I did before because why? Because I work. I work two jobs. I work two jobs. I work. Like, one of my jobs is five minutes away from my house.

[Caleb]

I get that. But now you're just working more hours so that you can eat out.

[Alyssa]

But when I eat out, it's eating.

[Caleb]

Out because you're working more.

[Alyssa]

You're working every day.

[Caleb]

Like, how can you say 200? Ethan, he works.

[Alyssa]

Wake up.

[Caleb]

Ethan, wake up.

[Ethan]

I am awake.

[Alyssa]

I didn't sound like it.

[Caleb]

How are you saying 200?

[Ethan]

I mean, it just doesn't feel like.

[Alyssa]

No, think of it this way, that if you go to Chick Fil A almost every single day, you're at work, which is right down the. Like, not even down the street. Like, it's in the next parking lot from where you work. And you spend $12 every day you're at work on Chick Fil A. Do you think that Not. It doesn't add up over 30 days.

[Ethan]

Yeah, but I don't. I don't always get Chick Fil A, though. Like, I know I get a majority of the time, but I don't get it every day.

[Caleb]

Thousand dollars going out to eat is what this household did.

[Alyssa]

And yeah, when we. Like when we go out to eat, we'll spend. Maybe. I think the max we spend is usually $70 when we go out together. But, like, that's. We do that maybe twice a month. So obviously, if we're eating out on our own, which, like I said, I usually pack my lunch now. So I pack my lunch.

[Caleb]

Just that you ramped up eating out. You guys make no sense. You're contradicting each other. You're owning yourself.

[Alyssa]

It's like half and half now, so.

[Caleb]

Half and half is insane. Half and half is crazy. That is way too much money. What are you talking about?

[Alyssa]

Because all, like, yesterday I packed my lunch, but I forgot my lunchbox at home, so I was already.

[Caleb]

That's a day. That is not half the days you tit. What are you talking about? Well that is a one time cherry picked excuse. That is not let's talk about student loans. I know it's something we all avoid talking about, but if your private student loans are crushing you, why Refi might be exactly what you need. They don't rely on your credit score alone. They look for borrowers who have the desire and the ability to repay. That is a game changer in a market where most lenders only see a number interest rates under 6% guaranteed. That's practically a unicorn in student lending. Plus they offer structured payment plans to lower your monthly bill and even a co signer release program so your mom and dad can step off the hook. Why? Refi is known for their personal service. No faceless call centers. You get a dedicated rep who actually cares about your progress. They've got a 4.6 star rating on Google which tells you people genuinely like working with them. So if your private student loans are burying you, it is time to reach out. Why Refi wants to help you climb out of debt, not push you further into it. Check them out at yrefi.com hammer that is yrefy.com hammer or call 889-733-978 that is 88973 3978. Break free from the high interest trap and get your finances under control once and for all.

[Alyssa]

Well, it's happened before because like I said, I work the days when I go to one job, I'm there at 5 o' clock in the morning and then I have to be at my second job at 1 and I don't leave my first job until 12. I go straight from my first job to my second job and I don't have any food in the morning other than what I can make at my job in the morning. So then yeah, sometimes I do have to buy lunch.

[Caleb]

Here's a little fun fact of the second job you have that brings in fourteen hundred dollars a month. A thousand of it is going out to eat. You are working so that you can go out to eat. So that you can work so that you can go out to eat. You wouldn't have to work so much if you didn't spend all your money.

[Alyssa]

But that's also. That's combined though, so it has to combine.

[Caleb]

Call it half. You're still working your ass off and he's suggesting you go out to eat more than him anyway.

[Alyssa]

How? How would I go out to eat more than you.

[Caleb]

Well, you say you go half the days.

[Alyssa]

Maybe half the days. I work. He goes almost every day he works.

[Caleb]

Ethan.

[Ethan]

Yeah, I mean, I would say I do go more than she does.

[Caleb]

Why you make less. What the f are we talking about?

[Alyssa]

And it's like we buy stuff to meal prep. Like we buy chicken and rice and we plan to make the food. But sometimes I don't do it because.

[Caleb]

How do we fail? How do we fail? Are we just completely lazy? Ethan and white frogan together at last, finally. And they're just going out to eat every day of their lives.

[Alyssa]

Well, like I said, like we buy stuff to meal prep. But I don't always get the time to meal prep because I work all the time. I don't get home.

[Caleb]

No, that's not what meal prep is. Meal prep is in the limited time you do have, you meal prep. So that in those long days.

[Alyssa]

What I'm saying, he's home more so because he likes to cook.

[Caleb]

Well, why aren't you doing? Why aren't you doing.

[Alyssa]

Because he doesn't know how to cook the chicken. He doesn't know how to cook.

[Caleb]

Oh, then the way that you do. Don't make it the way she does.

[Alyssa]

He used to use her grill all the time. And the chicken he makes on the grill is really good. What is wrong with buy a new grill. We can buy a new grill, boil.

[Ethan]

It, you know how many times boiled chicken?

[Caleb]

No, I'm just saying you can cook it in so many ways. Put it in the stove. It's the easiest damn thing you've ever done in your life.

[Alyssa]

Like we. We bake chicken with the foil wrap things that you make. Like you've done that before.

[Ethan]

We didn't do chicken. We do sausage.

[Alyssa]

Oh, sorry.

[Caleb]

Oh my goodness. What is wrong with you? Are you miscellaneous bullshit. This could be video games. This could be, I think, stopping in and getting an energy drink, that kind of stuff. Miscellaneous. Proven miscellaneous. What do you think that was last month? It's just all that extra stuff outgoing. That. That is not going out to eat. But it is. Could be a lot. Boo boo. What do you think?

[Ethan]

I'd say probably 500.

[Caleb]

Okay.

[Alyssa]

I was gonna say 500.

[Caleb]

Okay. 2659.43. You guys are broken. You guys are broken. You guys are broken. Take that, combine it with your going out to eat spending and. Oh, that's your entire income already gone more. No, no, not even close. That's spending $946. Which, by the way, there were other large purchases of $1,590. We don't know exactly what those are yet. They could be. They could be not. But provable was. Provable was $3606.30. He's the villain. She's the villain. You guys are both the villain. You're spending 70 of your household income on you. Bullshit. Contributing nothing. Just fun slop.

[Alyssa]

Well, it's like, I see it as, like, you're working for. But I like some of that.

[Caleb]

That's good. But you can't complain about work anymore because you're not working for necessities. You're working for bullshit. So it's now I'm no longer giving. I. I wanted to give you a handshake at the beginning. Like, she's grinding so she can take care of the household. No, you're grinding for wants so you can no longer complain about your grind. You're only grinding for the things you want. You wouldn't have to if you weren't spending all your money on bullshit. You could cut your hours. Absolutely. Probably not anymore, because we got to pay off debt. But before, yeah, you didn't need to do all this.

[Alyssa]

I don't want to work, like, two jobs longer than.

[Caleb]

I don't give a f. Like, obviously you want the bullshit more than not wanting to work those jobs, because you're working those jobs to pay for your bullshit. What was it, 3600? You. What are you talking about? It's twice his income. What are you talking about?

[Alyssa]

But again, like, with that being combined.

[Caleb]

Like, I don't know, 70% of your combined income? Yes.

[Alyssa]

I don't know what he spends his money on. Like, I don't know.

[Caleb]

Do we not have these conversations at all? We're planning to get married, and you don't know what he spends his money on?

[Alyssa]

Like, he'll tell me every once in a while. Oh, that. Like, he'll buy something on his game. Or, like, I mean, I just assume every day that he's going out to eat. Like, I just assume because I know he doesn't pack his lunch. And if we don't meal prep, he doesn't take lunch with him other than, like, if we have leftovers from we went out to dinner the night before or something.

[Caleb]

Guys, what was our outflow last month? Outflow? We know your INFLOW bought that 5200. What was your out. Flow. Out flow.

[Alyssa]

I don't think it would be more than what we make either.

[Ethan]

I wouldn't be surprised if it was more than what we Make.

[Alyssa]

I don't know how it would be if I'm barely spending on my credit cards anymore.

[Ethan]

Well, if it's.

[Caleb]

What do you think, big guy?

[Alyssa]

I think maybe 4,000.

[Caleb]

Okay.

[Alyssa]

45.

[Ethan]

I think around there too.

[Caleb]

Okay. $6,411.17. You guys can't guess shit to save your lives.

[Alyssa]

We were closer this time though. We were closer than the first.

[Caleb]

You're broken. Do you guys not talk at all? Do you guys not communicate? Because you guys have no idea what the is happening in this household.

[Alyssa]

I feel like.

[Caleb]

Not for a single.

[Alyssa]

Like we haven't. I feel like cuz I used to ask him questions a lot more but.

[Caleb]

Cuz that's not an engagement ring.

[Alyssa]

It's a promise ring.

[Caleb]

Okay. I was going to say cuz we're getting that. That is the finger.

[Alyssa]

Yeah, it's a promise ring.

[Caleb]

He has a gay one. Okay.

[Alyssa]

It's Darth Vader. It was his early Christmas present.

[Caleb]

No, I love Star Wars. I don't give a. About your passion about Star Wars. You guys don't talk.

[Alyssa]

Well, it's like when he was out of town and I found his statement. Like I texted him, if you don't want to talk about this stuff anymore, fine. I'll take care of me, you take care of you. But I'm not going to split the text.

[Caleb]

Oh yeah. Oh, and don't you worry. We're going to go all through those text messages and find the drama in the post show. We always do Hammer Elite number one on YouTube for a reason. It was a while ago, so it might keyword search.

[Ethan]

I feel like we don't really. We don't really talk about that stuff over.

[Caleb]

Oh. Or talk about that stuff at all.

[Ethan]

I mean we, we don't like a lot really.

[Alyssa]

When did we go to Buffalo?

[Ethan]

September.

[Caleb]

You went to Buffalo?

[Alyssa]

His. His dad paid for it.

[Caleb]

So you went to Buffalo.

[Alyssa]

It was my first NFL game in Buffalo. I don't know anything about football, so I was fine with just like I was happy to be there. It was my first NFL game.

[Caleb]

First NFL game. You live in Fort Worth.

[Ethan]

Yeah, but the Cowboys suck ass. Huh? The Cowboys suck ass.

[Caleb]

How are the Buffaloes?

[Ethan]

Good?

[Alyssa]

Buffaloes.

[Caleb]

I think it's on McMillan. I mean he's got it up top.

[Ethan]

But I thought he lost it as he was falling toward the ground.

[Caleb]

Ground there. You had to go to Buffalo for it. Buffalo.

[Ethan]

We went to Niagara Falls.

[Alyssa]

We did go to Niagara Falls.

[Caleb]

That's so here we go. Here comes the slop. Give it to me. Give it to me.

[Alyssa]

So it's kind of a long conversation.

[Caleb]

Oh, I bet it is. Take me to the top. And this is what I live for. We're putting it on screen. We're blurring out names. It starts with, what you doing? From her. Ethan says, taking a. She says, your Amazon card is over the limit by $100 plus and you're late on your payment. Ethan says, my payment just went through. I paid 150. She says, I'm looking at the statement right now. You told me it was, like, at $800. When you quiet when you looked at your bill a few weeks ago because you said you needed to pay it at the beginning of October. It literally says it's late and your minimum payment is now $200 plus. I don't know why you're, like, not telling me this stuff. Like, you told me you looked at your Amazon card when we talked about this about a week ago and told me it was around $800. I'm upset because I don't even know what to do about this anymore. Like, I try helping and telling you that you can be honest with me and I won't be upset, but seeing that it's over the limit and late makes me feel like it just went over my head. I'm not trying to blow up about it. I'm just upset you're kind of blowing up about it. Well, okay. I don't know why it's showing. It's $200 plus and late when I paid 153 days ago, and that was more than what my minimum was. It's not even letting me log into the account, so I can't even prove it two days ago. Correction, she says, you don't need to prove it. I'm looking at the statement. You have a late fee. He says, no, I donated profit because clearly you're not believing me that I paid it when I did. We'll see it in these statements. She says, or, and then you say, Ethan says, they print the statements out early. She says, okay, if you said you paid the $150, that's fine, but it doesn't lie about the fact that you've had a. You have a late fee, meaning you did not pay in time for September or you didn't pay September at all. Also doesn't change the fact that you told me there was about $800 on your card. I'm not going to argue about this. Call them or something and see if they've waived the fee. The late fee. Maybe I don't know, I'm done talking about this stuff because I really don't feel like it's going to do anything anymore. I'm not mad at you. I'm just disappointed. That's the heavy hitter. And it's not just wrong of me to be upset. And it's not wrong of me to be upset with you telling me one thing and saying it's otherwise. Like, I was feeling better about this stuff after we talked about it, and I felt like you reassured me the other. Ooh, so you were manipulating her, kind of leading her astray and it at being okay. I don't feel like you're understanding it from my perspective. How are we gonna, like, save for anything? Move out on our own? You guys don't live. Oh, my gosh. Pay for the boys stuff. What's the boy stuff?

[Ethan]

That's kind of interesting.

[Caleb]

Okay, hold on. That. Get a house, get our own car insurance, be able to still go out and do the things we want. If we can't be on the same page about this stuff, I'm not going to drown like my parents do. Take care of it and be honest with me. She sends the thing, the, you know, the statement you send a screenshot of the minimum payment due she sent in. Big old keeps going. Okay, this still doesn't change that you were late in your payment when you said you were going to take care of it and that you told me last week your balance was around $800 because you said you looked. That is what I don't understand.

[Alyssa]

If you.

[Caleb]

If you want your own finances and I. And I have my own life, fine, I'll leave you alone about it. But I don't know how you might expect us to progress and have stability with this stuff if you can't even talk about it or figure it out. All I've tried to do is help, babe, but I can't anymore if this is just what happens. That's why I asked specifically if you want me to help with the budget. Help you with a budget? Write it out. Look through your account with you. I've offered to take care of. Of it for you and you just say you've got it. Well, should you take care of it for him? I don't know about that. You should work with him. Work with each other. Help each other. If you say you've got it, please don't let this happen again. I'm done talking about it now. He says, all right, I paid more on it, so not a problem anymore.

[Ethan]

And it hasn't happened Again and we'll see.

[Caleb]

I'm gonna go through it. So what is the boy.

[Alyssa]

So do you wanna. Do you wanna explain or do you want me to explain?

[Ethan]

So we have. My two little brothers are living with us.

[Caleb]

Uh huh. Living with you. But it sounds like you guys live with someone.

[Ethan]

We do. We have two roommates, so it's us.

[Caleb]

Oh, so you're with your fam.

[Alyssa]

No, no, we live together.

[Caleb]

Okay.

[Ethan]

We have our own house. Yes, but two roommates.

[Caleb]

Okay.

[Ethan]

So we have two. Two teenage boys living with us.

[Alyssa]

They're 13 and 14.

[Ethan]

Yeah. So that.

[Caleb]

That you take care of them?

[Ethan]

Yes.

[Caleb]

Yours, your brothers?

[Ethan]

Yes.

[Caleb]

From your rich parents?

[Ethan]

No. Oh, from.

[Caleb]

How do you have other brothers?

[Alyssa]

From his mom.

[Ethan]

My mom, she left, she fleed, she's just not really.

[Caleb]

That's fine. So you're taking care of them. So you gotta. You guys are raising them?

[Ethan]

Basically.

[Caleb]

How old are they?

[Ethan]

13 or 14.

[Caleb]

Okay, what's the permanent solution when we're on this? Are you guys with them until 18?

[Ethan]

We don't necessarily have a permanent.

[Caleb]

There's no other people that are more so stable?

[Ethan]

No, no, not at all.

[Alyssa]

And his dad doesn't.

[Caleb]

Why is that not.

[Ethan]

Because they're not his.

[Alyssa]

They're not his.

[Caleb]

So you.

[Ethan]

My dad doesn't care.

[Alyssa]

There's very like. This is the situation we came into like when he moved in. So originally we signed or I signed the lease of the house in November, this November last year. Sorry, last November. Because my roommates or our roommates were looking for a house because they had to move out of their house kind of by where my mom lived. So my roommates and I met at my old job. So we like the day that like they were talking about going to look at houses, they asked if I wanted to go with them and we found a house because my parents were looking at moving back to Ohio. So I was like, I'm going to need somewhere to live because I don't want to move back to Ohio. So.

[Caleb]

Wait, but the kid's father has custody?

[Ethan]

Yes, he does.

[Alyssa]

He is conservative.

[Caleb]

What if he just do it because.

[Ethan]

He lives in a motel?

[Caleb]

Oh good.

[Ethan]

Yeah.

[Caleb]

What are we doing?

[Ethan]

So the thing is he makes the money to, you know.

[Caleb]

Is he a drug addict?

[Ethan]

No, he's not.

[Caleb]

Why is he in a motel?

[Ethan]

Because he doesn't need a house because it's just him in the sense. So.

[Caleb]

Because I've not needed a house the.

[Ethan]

Way that they did it, which makes zero sense to me is he has. He's the conservator. So he's the main one. He lives in a motel because he gave my mom full custody of them, basically.

[Alyssa]

So it's split.

[Ethan]

Split custody, but they would live with her basically full time and see him on the weekends.

[Caleb]

Okay, okay. But so we're budgeting them until we can figure out a situation which that all of a sudden makes the 5200. Such a lot. A lot. Well, you needed to stretch further. And I don't understand how you can spend 70% of your money on. If we have two kids to take care of, two teens to take care of.

[Alyssa]

We buy for them too.

[Caleb]

I'm sure. But that's not what they need.

[Alyssa]

They have everything they need too, because we'll see.

[Caleb]

I don't know how you guys are going further. If you can't pay your rent, you get evicted. This is what everyone says until they can't, and then they get evicted. You guys are. Hey, you're headed down that dangerous path. That's what you don't understand. No one sees it while they're in the storm.

[Alyssa]

Okay?

[Caleb]

You're in the storm. This is what every financial situation looks like when people are headed on their way to no longer being able to pay their bills. Takes one layoff. What happens if the income source gets disabled? Who knows? Gets hit by a car? You know, life is crazy. Life is crazy. We are in an economic precarious situation. Interest rates not going down fast enough for the job market to fully recover because, you know, inflation is not where the Fed wants it. Okay, very good. Job market's not great. We're having, like, interesting job growth. Some months negative, some months positive. Positive. You might get laid off. You might get laid off. We don't know. Retail might slow down. We'll see. Typically does in a recession. We don't know if we're in one. Well, you don't know. You cannot say that you are. Okay? You've paid rent up until this point. You guys are in a scary situation and you're going further into debt. You spend more than you make, and 70% of it's on bullshit. So I don't want to hear that. So what they need is security. Do you have a fully funded emergency fund?

[Alyssa]

I have started you. I have. I have a savings.

[Caleb]

You have started you.

[Alyssa]

But at least starting is in the better direction.

[Caleb]

But you would have a lot more if you weren't spending 70 on.

[Alyssa]

Well, I have.

[Caleb]

If you guys break up, you're not taking care of the. The kid, you tit. So it doesn't even matter. He has nothing Goes to Chick Fil A every day. Mm. What do you guys think the combined household financial score is? 0 to 10. 0 being the worst, 10 being the best.

[Ethan]

Probably a 4.

[Alyssa]

I think a 3.

[Caleb]

If you want your financial score, get it for free@caleb hammer.com Take the assessment. Just takes a few minutes. It'll tell you where you stand in the world of money. Where you need to improve, what you need to do to improve, and where you're already doing pretty darn great. So just check that out. Link in the description below. And if you don't want to be like a guess who ends up on the show, you got to download the dollar wise budgeting app. Best budgeting app out there. It caters to you instead of forcing you to do things like other budgeting apps. It's not ran by these private equity companies that are just trying to collect your information. It is an actual good budgeting app that works for you. Check it out. Dollarwise app. There's a free trial to see if you like it. And if you do, sign up for the annual version like the majority of users do, because you get my budget friendly cookbook signed by me mailed directly to you. That only exists for about a month left and then it's gone forever. Can't be purchased. So check it out. Let's talk about discover it. Whose card is this?

[Alyssa]

That's my card.

[Caleb]

What the is wrong with you? You are spending on this. You said you're not spending on cards. Liar.

[Ethan]

You.

[Caleb]

You.

[Alyssa]

I don't know. I literally don't know what the charge.

[Caleb]

Okay, then shut the up. What the did we just do this entire 42 minutes leading up to this? You started with I never spent. I look at my statements every day. How can you say you don't know what's happening about a charge that you said never had? What are you doing? That's impossible. What a lie.

[Alyssa]

Well, because I know.

[Caleb]

Cancel. Die. Hey, what do you think about this? She just threw you under the bus for 42 minutes and look at what just happened.

[Ethan]

I mean, I know about that card.

[Caleb]

Yeah, but she literally just nuked herself.

[Ethan]

That's okay. That's the card that we use. Or I guess she uses because I don't use it. I'm not an authorized user on it, big guy.

[Caleb]

Am talking about the fact that she said she looks at her statements every day and she doesn't spend on her credit card. Well, she did, and she doesn't know what it's for. How could she possibly say those things? Come on. She threw you under the bus for 42 minutes. What do you think about that? Perspective.

[Ethan]

She will buy. She'll buy labo boos. She'll buy blind boxes.

[Caleb]

What is wrong with you?

[Alyssa]

We use. I haven't bought a labubu in like two months.

[Ethan]

You almost bought two months yesterday.

[Alyssa]

It wasn't. It wasn't a labubu.

[Ethan]

You were looking yesterday. Oh, come on.

[Caleb]

It doesn't matter.

[Ethan]

It's a blind box. It's the same thing.

[Caleb]

Gambling.

[Ethan]

That's. Yeah, but we. I guess we use.

[Alyssa]

So I opened this card right before we got together.

[Ethan]

She used.

[Caleb]

You're using it while you are together.

[Alyssa]

Well, so what I'm trying to say is that I opened it right before we got together. And honestly, as soon as we got together was when I started spending on it. Because the only thing.

[Caleb]

Hey, it's your fault. You hear that, Ethan? It's her fault that you guys got together. She's spending on the credit card because you guys got together. It's your fault, big guy.

[Alyssa]

I had put on the card before we got together. Was. My friend was going to Six Flags and I asked my mom, should I put my Six Flags season pass on here? And she said, yes, as long as you pay it off right away.

[Caleb]

Here they. Ethan, it's your fault.

[Alyssa]

I mean, I spent $400 on an Airbnb for us to go to Lake Whitney.

[Caleb]

Hear that, Ethan?

[Ethan]

It's your fault. She uses that for. For stuff that we go and do.

[Alyssa]

See how you said we use it at first and now it's. I use it.

[Ethan]

Well. Cause, I mean, you do use it. I'm not an authorized user on the card. I can't use the card.

[Alyssa]

Yes, but nine times out of 10, when I use it, that's when we're together.

[Ethan]

If you let me finish, that's what I about to say.

[Alyssa]

She.

[Ethan]

She uses it when we go do stuff. So, you know, Airbnb, we go to concerts or stuff. She'll use it for, you know, concert tickets.

[Alyssa]

Like when we went to go see Bad Omens last year.

[Caleb]

Didn't let him finish.

[Alyssa]

I spent for all of. I paid for all the tickets. I paid for all of the merch. I paid for all of the food. Like, I paid for all of it with that card. I don't see him pulling out his wallet for that. That's why it's a credit card. Okay, Is that not money that I still have to pay back?

[Ethan]

It is, but it's. Well, how about when we went to.

[Alyssa]

Lake Whitney and I spent the 400 doll Airbnb. And I said, hey, I'll split it in half right now. I'll put it on my Discover card, but I need you to pay me back when the second half comes out. And you didn't.

[Caleb]

You didn't. Did he agree to it?

[Alyssa]

Yes.

[Caleb]

Dick.

[Ethan]

Dick, Is your credit cards good? Yeah, they are.

[Caleb]

Yeah.

[Ethan]

But your family hated it. In the post show, you did reveal that you were still receiving money from a client from your stripping days. Are you still receiving money from him?

[Alyssa]

I'm a very patient person. My mom is disabled. I have been taught patience. Hey, my family hated it.

[Ethan]

Should we get into that? I would love for you to just.

[Caleb]

Use your words and not shut down to the point to where I do yell. Said that I would pay for the.

[Ethan]

Gun that we bought on your card.

[Alyssa]

So are you safe? Pixie?

[Caleb]

That's kind of stupid. I'll be honest. But what's not is actually getting a checking account that gives you free money. Free money. We like free money. You can get up to 350 in bonus cash right now. When you sign up for the checking account that I use. Chime also, it makes your savings grow at a 3.5 APY interest rate. Guys, you can watch Financial Audit and get free money at the same time. Who would have thought? That's incredible. Check it out. Link in the description below. Sign up for time. Get that $350 right now in your checking account.

[Alyssa]

So it's like. Yeah, he'll say, we didn't.

[Caleb]

Dick.

[Alyssa]

I use it.

[Caleb]

Dick.

[Ethan]

We just. We just forgot about it.

[Alyssa]

Like, it never forget about it. I reminded you like three times. But if. Because that's what I'm talking about. That like we, we sell each other back and forth for everything because we do such a weird split. Like half of the time we pay for stuff with my cards.

[Caleb]

And I said you don't spend on your card. The balance went up on this card. So you're backtracking everything. You're a liar.

[Ethan]

Like, when we sell stuff, it's debit. So, like, it doesn't matter.

[Caleb]

She's spending on this card. She said she doesn't. Liar.

[Alyssa]

I don't know what liar on that card because I genuinely haven't used.

[Caleb]

You look at your statements every day. Liar.

[Alyssa]

I do. I do look at statements every day. I'm not lying. It may be the interest charge, but I do not spend on that card.

[Caleb]

Liar. Liar. Dude, I literally charges right here. And this is your most recent month, so I don't want to hear it. Like, what the F you talking about? Hey big guy. How long do you think this takes her to pay off? If she doesn't purchase, which she's a liar, so she can't actually not purchase how much? And she only makes her minimum through payment. The balance is 2,943 and $0.44, which is up from the previous month with an $85 minimum payment. If she only makes her minimum since she doesn't purchase, which she always does because she's a liar, how long does it take to pay off?

[Ethan]

Six years.

[Caleb]

That's interesting. 12. So that's 12 years of your marriage. Maybe 11 years of your marriage is going to pay off her card from her little boo boos of which she purchases on. So it's actually going to be like 20 or 40 years. Thoughts? Ethan?

[Ethan]

It's a long time.

[Caleb]

Oh, that is a very well thought out thought. Insightful even. That's a long time.

[Alyssa]

Frogan, where are you getting this? What? What are you talking about? I don't know. Well, they said earlier that I look like Billie Eilish, so. Huh.

[Caleb]

I could potentially see it. Do you have like the biggest hits in the world?

[Ethan]

I mean they're not bad.

[Caleb]

Okay, well done, dude. Billy. Oh my gosh.

[Alyssa]

I wish.

[Caleb]

Oh my gosh, Billy.

[Ethan]

Yeah, you. Billy, you wish for the. The life of back pain. I mean you already had back pain.

[Alyssa]

But I have scoliosis.

[Caleb]

She can have back pain. Doesn't affect me. Okay, so yeah, Frogan.

[Alyssa]

Right.

[Caleb]

Twelve years.

[Alyssa]

And like I said, I feel like, because most of this stuff feel like, feel like most of the stuff that is on this card, like yes, I do buy my trinkets here and there with this card and that's the card.

[Caleb]

That you never spend on.

[Alyssa]

Most of what was on that card to begin with though was from both of us or things that I.

[Caleb]

The goal post, they are moving, they're.

[Alyssa]

Flying down the road together. He was working an average of what, 20 hours a week, maybe 25.

[Caleb]

Bye bye goalposts. There they go. Not only did I not spend on the credit card, but now it's. Well yeah, but a lot of the spending before was because of, you know, this bitch over here, this horrible boyfriend.

[Alyssa]

So like when Discover was doing like their 5% back for groceries, that's the card we would use for groceries. So we would go see.

[Caleb]

Oh, I can't even see them anymore. Damn, they're gone. Only they were the size of Billie Eilish's tits. I could see them for miles. You said you don't spend that in Here.

[Alyssa]

I don't.

[Caleb]

I. Oh, that's interesting. $38.55.

[Alyssa]

$38 is better than when I used to spend hundreds on it.

[Caleb]

Oh, go post. There they go. Oh, Crossing The Atlantic now. $64.95 of interest accruing on a credit card that you cannot pay off. Cuz you only make your minimum payment that you are purchasing on. Why are we purchasing on a credit card that we cannot pay off that is accruing interest. What the are you doing? What a disaster. What an embarrassment. You say he's holding you back. You want to get married?

[Alyssa]

I am not making late payments. At least I'm not making late payments. At least I'm making my payments on time.

[Caleb]

How do you deal with this? It must be real nice if you're willing to put up for this. Ethan. I mean, Ethan, wake up.

[Ethan]

I. I don't have any late payments. Not. Not anymore.

[Alyssa]

Not.

[Caleb]

That's. I wasn't necessarily asking you for. To do a rebuttal to her, but it's the fact that she is throwing you under the bus, her life partner. Anytime there's any valid criticism towards her, it's. Yeah, but Ethan's a little. Sorry I said that, not her. She says you're a little.

[Ethan]

I mean, she can. She can throw me under the bus, but I mean, it's. I mean, that's her card.

[Alyssa]

Like I have spent.

[Ethan]

Yes, you have.

[Alyssa]

Everything that's on there was for us.

[Ethan]

I don't use.

[Alyssa]

I pay for it. Okay, yes, you don't use Labubus, but you know, it's. It's everything. Like the bigger purchases that have gone on that card. The trip to Whitney, the Bad Omens concert, the groceries. Yeah, that is for us. When are you gonna help me pay for it?

[Ethan]

That is for us. But whatever. However much is on there. The what? How much you say?

[Alyssa]

So you have to think it was $400 to go to the Bad Omens concert and then about $200 in merch, and then the Airbnb was $400, and then the groceries we bought in Whitney. That adds up a lot quicker than you think it does.

[Ethan]

Yeah, I know it does, but that's still not.

[Caleb]

It ain't hello Kitty.

[Ethan]

It's still not all of Kitty.

[Caleb]

It ain't hello Kitty on there.

[Alyssa]

Not anymore at least.

[Caleb]

Uh huh. Says the person spending money. You're no longer a reliable source of information. Hello Kitty. That's what putting our future off is worth. That's more important than our kid brothers, Our teen brothers that we're Taking care of.

[Alyssa]

Well, they get Pokemon instead. I get hello kids.

[Caleb]

And making sure we have any kind of safety net whatsoever just in case anything happens. And keep a roof over there hiding utilities and food.

[Alyssa]

I have a roof over my head.

[Caleb]

Or I have a blanket. Hello kitties.

[Alyssa]

And he has. So it goes like it goes both ways. Yes, I have hello kitties. He has how much money put into his games?

[Caleb]

How much money, Ethan?

[Ethan]

I think I just looked the other day and I think over prepared for this. Over the span of 10 years for my Steam account it was like $3,000.

[Caleb]

Chunky skins games.

[Alyssa]

It has be more than that.

[Caleb]

If they're skins, sell them.

[Ethan]

You can't just go, no, no, no, no, not like that.

[Alyssa]

Like I know how much you've spent on just Fortnite.

[Ethan]

Oh gosh. I mean within.

[Alyssa]

Exactly.

[Ethan]

But I mean that's within. That's also within.

[Alyssa]

Within 10 years. But it's still a big number.

[Ethan]

Yeah.

[Alyssa]

So you can't say that I'm wrong for doing these things. But you'll do them too.

[Ethan]

Yeah, but it's, it's. I mean it's not much different. But I mean at the same time that's. Those stuff like that's not on a credit card. Like my stuff was all.

[Alyssa]

Just because it's on a credit card doesn't mean that you're not spending it.

[Ethan]

Yeah, but I'm not in debt on it though. But I'm not still.

[Alyssa]

You're not putting anything into your savings.

[Caleb]

Yeah.

[Ethan]

So you'll still not actively.

[Alyssa]

Yeah.

[Ethan]

Paying for a credit card though. I mean I am, but not.

[Alyssa]

Not at least I pay on my credit cards. At least I'm not late on my payments.

[Ethan]

I. I am paying all my credit cards. Just because I. Just because I don't put the shit that I want on a credit card doesn't mean that I'm in the wrong or it doesn't mean that it's you it's any different. Like it's, it's on. It's not a credit card.

[Alyssa]

It's no different than you saying I'm going to like you buy like little things on your Best Buy card all the time. Stuff that's not even at Best Buy.

[Caleb]

Interesting the thing you purchased Best Buy always throwing people under the bus for the exact stuff you do.

[Alyssa]

But he's doing the exact same.

[Caleb]

Oh, Gopos.

[Ethan]

You got me.

[Caleb]

Oh my poor man. Oh my poor man. Those. Those things better be sucking all the oxygen out of the room at this point. Stick up with this. I mean they're Pretty nice, but they have to be. I don't see any other way.

[Alyssa]

Nice eyes.

[Caleb]

You got blue eyes.

[Alyssa]

Thank you.

[Caleb]

Very nice.

[Alyssa]

Thank you.

[Caleb]

Yeah. Best Buy. And you were saying he spends all this on Best Buy.

[Alyssa]

We spend a. Oh, it's become.

[Caleb]

We conveniently has chosen it was we.

[Alyssa]

To begin with when he started this. He said we. We use this car.

[Caleb]

No, no. Your language.

[Ethan]

Tit.

[Caleb]

No, he said, hey, septum Pearson. You said he.

[Ethan]

He.

[Alyssa]

He.

[Caleb]

I just said, you know, before I called out you for your Best Buy purchase.

[Alyssa]

Yes, but he. If you're calling him out for saying.

[Caleb]

We, this is with brain function. Does it? Because every person I've met that has.

[Alyssa]

One, they get about getting one.

[Ethan]

No, I thought about getting a stud.

[Caleb]

Not a septum before this episode.

[Alyssa]

I.

[Caleb]

For every other episode, I say I completely forgot. Well, I'll ask now. I'm sorry that it's so far in. Do I have consent to make fun of you guys and make jokes and rip in now you're. Now.

[Ethan]

He's a little too late for that now.

[Caleb]

But do I in all serious?

[Ethan]

Yes. Yes. Yes.

[Alyssa]

Okay.

[Caleb]

Well, you guys have.

[Ethan]

I feel like that's kind of part of being here too.

[Caleb]

It certainly is. But I do like to ask before we start filming. I. I don't know why I completely forgot.

[Alyssa]

He likes to be verbally degraded.

[Caleb]

He.

[Ethan]

Yeah. So he just. He saw us and decided to let it rip and forgot about his. His priorities, I guess.

[Alyssa]

Lindsay said we look cute. Say all you want.

[Caleb]

Lindsay's nice to everyone.

[Ethan]

She has to be.

[Caleb]

I don't even know so. Because she has to be. She's just nice to everyone. Like again, this. This will be so dated at this point, but I saw the ugliest woman I've ever seen in the world on Twitter and she calls. Lindsay said she's pretty and she's the ugliest woman I've ever seen in my life. But it's fine. It's fine. That is old news at this point. And then you went in, you got some bullshit from Target.

[Alyssa]

It. How much is the charge? Target?

[Caleb]

That was not groceries.

[Alyssa]

No, say it. I know. Don't even pretend it was tampons. I know because I remember. I remember that day because like I said, I don't bloody day. I don't spend on my card. So when I do, it's usually Kroger, which would probably have also been. Is it about the same amount?

[Caleb]

21.

[Alyssa]

Probably tampons as well, because they have the really big pack of tampons.

[Caleb]

Same day we went to two locations for tampons. Yeah. You're no longer a reliable source of information. I already told you that. Hundreds in interest this year. So far you're at a 26.99% interest rate of death. All for 82 cents in cash back in your balance. Well done.

[Alyssa]

I see it as if I have to use my credit cards for anything. I use my Discover card because it has the cash back.

[Caleb]

My capital didn't use your card cards.

[Alyssa]

If I have to.

[Caleb]

Well, before it wasn't. It was. You didn't. Who's capital one?

[Alyssa]

Mine.

[Caleb]

Oh, two in a row lady, she purchased on it. The lady who never purchases on her cards. Two in a row.

[Ethan]

What was it for?

[Caleb]

We will get to that.

[Ethan]

Okay.

[Caleb]

All I know is she purchased on a card that she says she never purchases. This one takes an extra year to pay off. 13 years this time. What are we doing? Yeah, I. Liar. Liar.

[Alyssa]

I genuinely like. I do not remember other than that one for Target. Because I remember we were buying groceries with another card and I paid the difference for my tampons with that card.

[Caleb]

Listen, I know you love tampon talk, but there is. It's this. Your entire life is not just tampons.

[Alyssa]

Well, since I got my birth control replaced. It's because I have the implant. I have like I just bleed.

[Caleb]

It's the best one. You can't feel it when you're in there. And it's the most effective. So that's what I really advocate for. The injection ladies.

[Alyssa]

Recommended.

[Caleb]

I liked it and I know you like that injection. You ain't filling up there, aren't you? Or the Both work. Okay. Right. Walmart. Walmart. That's an unknown tricky one because it's half. It's half groceries. And even at the groceries, who knows.

[Ethan]

The only time we ever go to Walmart is for groceries.

[Alyssa]

Yeah.

[Ethan]

Other than like we went to Walmart to get.

[Caleb]

Why in a credit card when we never spend money on credit card.

[Alyssa]

That accrued $46 charge is because of tampons. His mom. Because she is like when she had the boys she had 10 years ago. No, we've only had them for about a year.

[Caleb]

Oh, when she physically had them. Okay, not like. Not like literally outside birthing.

[Alyssa]

Like when she physically had them. She had a food card because she couldn't afford anything. So when she. When we took the boys. She lets us use it for groceries. She shut off.

[Caleb]

They're not fraud.

[Alyssa]

No, because she last name.

[Caleb]

Okay.

[Alyssa]

No, she left us.

[Caleb]

Well, she lets you. It is the government.

[Alyssa]

But go on But I mean, it's for the kids.

[Caleb]

Doesn't matter necessarily. I don't know. Maybe it does.

[Alyssa]

So continue. We. She shut off the food cart and didn't tell us.

[Caleb]

She shut off if the government did.

[Ethan]

No, she shut it off because we were using it. But she said we could use it.

[Alyssa]

She said that she looked at the balance. Yeah, she looked at the balance.

[Ethan]

I have no idea. Ah, just a lot of different stuff.

[Caleb]

Yeah, that's hard. I'm sorry.

[Alyssa]

But she looked at the balance of the food card and thought that we spent like. She said she looked at it wrong and thought that we spent what was left on it.

[Ethan]

I remember what she said. So there was like 400 something left on the card. And she was like, what did y' all spend 400 at? At Kroger? And I'm like, 400. Like, that's how much is left on the card we spent. I think we spent like 200 because, I mean, we don't spend a lot on groceries. And I was like, we didn't spend $400.

[Caleb]

And she.

[Ethan]

She sent me the picture and I'm like, that says balance. That doesn't say how much we spent. And I was like, I have the receipt right here.

[Alyssa]

Tell us that she didn't or she didn't tell us that she shut it off. So we were trying to buy a couple groceries and I had to pay for it with my credit card because we couldn't use the food card.

[Caleb]

So now what?

[Alyssa]

I mean, she hasn't shut it off.

[Caleb]

Since it was a temporary.

[Ethan]

Yeah, she literally just shut it off because she thought we spent 400.

[Alyssa]

The reason that that charge is on there is because I had to use that card for GR groceries.

[Caleb]

Excited to get to the funny, because there is a lot of it, but we're getting through the debts first. Amazon Synchrony. Whose is this?

[Ethan]

Mine.

[Caleb]

Oh, the first Ethan one Hope your Amazon past due. At the time of the statement, you owe double the payment. Well, and over the limit. You. You little tit. You little boy. You little simp.

[Ethan]

What are you doing?

[Alyssa]

That's what I was talking about. That, like, that's the. He'll. He'll tell me that, like, his balance is like. Like, I asked him the other day, what's your balance on your Amazon card? He said, it's like 600, but I don't know. Like, I don't know. I don't even know if he knows.

[Ethan]

What are you doing?

[Caleb]

Minimum depayment164 yo, $1110.35 on here. What the tit are we doing? You little tit. 3 years to pay this off. Pass due off.

[Ethan]

Well, I know it's the first thing you see on there.

[Caleb]

And it's just the first one.

[Ethan]

Oh no, sorry. It's just pointing to it. Well, it's that one right there.

[Caleb]

Okay.

[Ethan]

And then it's also that one. I mean a lot of the stuff that you see that's already here is hers. So like.

[Caleb]

Well for sake. This is hard. It's all Christmas shopping. It is. Who the are you Christmas shopping? You can't Christmas shop. You guys can't afford bills? Is that what you're getting? Yes. You can't afford Christmas, you dumb. What are you talking about?

[Alyssa]

Would you rather us just not have Christmas at all?

[Caleb]

Yeah.

[Alyssa]

So you'd rather a 13 and 14 year old not have Christmas?

[Caleb]

I'm not saying that necessarily, but definitely cut down for sure. You can't. You can't pay bills. You.

[Alyssa]

I mean I see it as. They never like he's over the limit.

[Caleb]

On the card that is purchasing on all this.

[Ethan]

I'm not using that card to purchase. That's all from my debit card.

[Caleb]

Oh my gosh. Even worse. Dude, the debit card should be going to paying off your debt. Ya. And lots of cat stuff as well. Of course.

[Alyssa]

We have two cats. Their names are Gizmo and Butters.

[Caleb]

Yippee.

[Alyssa]

Just wanted to tell you about our cats.

[Caleb]

Sorry I give a about your cats.

[Alyssa]

They are really cute. We have a ginger female don't give a.

[Caleb]

So no, we cut back dramatically on Christmas and I know that's hard, but the. Listen at 13 and 14 they realize they're not with their mom and dad. Do they also not realize that? Okay, yeah, maybe we're not in the best shape. I think they would understand.

[Ethan]

They do not. They lack common sense.

[Alyssa]

And like, like it's like trying.

[Ethan]

It's like trying to put a tennis ball a brick wall with them. It. It does not work.

[Alyssa]

And like don't get me wrong, they're good kids, but it's like they do have a really hard time understanding things that like they ask all the time can we go out to eat? Can we go out to eat? Cuz we make food. Cuz that's why we have the food card.

[Caleb]

Age for the next couple years is like the last time you can do this. Or may this might be the last year you can do it. Quantity at 5 below quantity. Not actual nicety, just the ability of opening.

[Ethan]

I think we did talk about that.

[Caleb]

They'Re already ordering a shit ton on Amazon.

[Alyssa]

They're very materialistic for how like.

[Caleb]

Okay, well that's a lesson you got to teach them then because that's not a good trait to carry into your late teens.

[Alyssa]

And that's what we do. Like we tell them. I don't have you tell them yet.

[Caleb]

Then we purchase all that bullshit. None of actions are fun.

[Ethan]

None of that stuff on there is for them.

[Caleb]

What then how are you trying to guilt trip me with them?

[Ethan]

You know, we do have. We do have stuff for them. Just.

[Caleb]

You are not getting her shit.

[Ethan]

Just not on.

[Caleb]

When you can't afford your damn bills, you're not getting. You're not getting hers shit. You can't guilt trip no tit. I do. And it's a lot of shit that you don't need. You.

[Alyssa]

Oh, I did forget that I bought the desire.

[Caleb]

Maybe it's nice. But listen, give them a better Christmas than we give each other. At the very least you cut back on yours. Give them 50% of what you're going to give each other and call that Christmas. Roof overhead paying our payments on time and not over the limit. Food on the table, utilities, stuff for school, after school activity programs, sports, music. That is what is important for them in their development right now. They do not need a bougie Christmas. Yeah, and you certainly don't need to be getting it for each other. Yeah, well, I don't think.

[Ethan]

I don't think we're giving them a bougie Christmas. Compared to what the stuff that. The things that they want. We are getting them anything that they want. Want.

[Alyssa]

One of them wants like he wants 100 Ralph Lauren shirt.

[Ethan]

He wants a 300 pair of. Pair of 10.

[Caleb]

Three late fees this year so far on this card.

[Alyssa]

Are you serious?

[Caleb]

Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah.

[Alyssa]

I only knew about the one late.

[Caleb]

Fees is here so far, Ethan.

[Alyssa]

See, and that's what I'm saying. Like, he'll talk about like how my spending is worse. And don't get me wrong, I do have bad spending, but my spending isn't a late fee. Did you see a late fee on either of my credit cards?

[Caleb]

Cards? No, not this year.

[Alyssa]

I've only had them this year. I opened them earlier this year.

[Caleb]

What the Are we doing?

[Alyssa]

No, earlier last year. Sorry.

[Caleb]

Regardless, You up?

[Alyssa]

So that's what I'm saying. Like, do I have to remind him every month? Like set a reminder on my calendar you have an upcoming card payment. Make sure you don't miss it. Well, does she and I saw.

[Ethan]

No, no, Because I, I what?

[Caleb]

You've missed an entire quarter.

[Alyssa]

But if we wouldn't have had that conversation. No, because I know what I'm saying. Hold on. If I wouldn't have. If I wouldn't have texted you and cut me off.

[Ethan]

But I can't cut you off.

[Alyssa]

No, I'm cutting you off because what I'm trying to say is important.

[Ethan]

Okay. What I'm trying to say is important too.

[Alyssa]

Okay, well, I was talking first.

[Ethan]

I was talking first earlier too.

[Alyssa]

What I'm saying is that, that if we wouldn't have had that conversation, if I wouldn't have texted you and said, I'm not doing this anymore, if you're not going to pull your own weight, how do I know you wouldn't have more late fees?

[Ethan]

Because I paid that card before you texted me that.

[Alyssa]

But it was still late. That's the point. Do you not realize that that affects you? And that's what I'm talking about is that stuff that affects you affects me. Like your speeding ticket. If we ever. When we get married and you get put on and we get put on insurance together, that's going to affect our insurance. He got like a 300 speeding ticket.

[Caleb]

Wanna know a dirty little secret? And no, I'm not starting an Only you're not broke because you suck with money. You just can't see where it's going. If your bank account is empty at the end of every month, that is not bad luck. That is bad tracking. And it's exactly why I use dollarwise. It shows you exactly where your money's going every single month. Spending, subscriptions and savings all in one situation. Simple dashboard. Everything you need and nothing you don't. And when you download Dollar Wise today you'll get to try it for free. Plus three months for just 9.99 so you can finally take control and see what your money's been doing behind your back. Click below to get started. Starbucks is and a waste of money. And you already know that by making your coffee at home and investing the rest. So now you need to do that with with your energy drink as well. Make gamer subs at home for just 40 cents a serving. And honestly, it literally tastes better. And we proved this accidentally via a blind taste test in our Hammer Elite show. Fat and Fatter. The number one ranked energy drink is gamersauce.

[Ethan]

Literally. The cherry flavor is insane.

[Caleb]

Listen, you can also get free samples to see if you like it or 10% off your order at gamersupps gg or click that link in the description below. Type in code Caleb.

[Alyssa]

That's what I'm saying is that stuff that affects him affects me or is going to affect me one day. So, yes, I do mother him a little bit, because I want to make sure that stuff gets done because I don't want it sitting on me the rest of my life.

[Ethan]

That's fair.

[Caleb]

Oh, wow, wow, wow. What is the screenshot of something. I don't even know what I'm looking at.

[Alyssa]

It's progressive leasing.

[Caleb]

What are you progressively leasing?

[Alyssa]

It's my laptop for school.

[Caleb]

You're in school.

[Alyssa]

I'm about to start.

[Caleb]

What are your hours gonna get cut to?

[Ethan]

It's gonna be online.

[Alyssa]

It's online school.

[Caleb]

That's still time.

[Alyssa]

And I'm only taking one class right now because I want to see how.

[Caleb]

One class for what? What is the class?

[Alyssa]

Cyber security.

[Caleb]

Oh, listen, I'll get you a certification. We got a cybersecurity certification through course careers. I'll get you that. That'll help you get into a career position as well. Well, a lot of people in the audience have taken those certifications to course careers, and they've made a lot of money changing jobs or getting raises. So I'll get you that. Maybe even start there instead of that.

[Alyssa]

But at least you end with something. Through my job. So my schooling is free for my job, so I'm not paying anything for school. I just have to pay for my laptop.

[Caleb]

I know, but school's a lot. In order to get to a. You didn't have a computer. He said you already have an iPad.

[Alyssa]

So I have the. They said that it wasn't compatible with iPad OS, so I needed to.

[Caleb]

A website, an app. To an app.

[Alyssa]

It's first. It's the program. I don't know what the program is.

[Caleb]

A program? An app?

[Alyssa]

Yes. It's what a program is.

[Caleb]

No, that's not what a program is. A schooling program. No, that doesn't automatically equal an app. Do you know words?

[Alyssa]

It's a software. It's a software.

[Caleb]

See, that's not even an app.

[Alyssa]

Sorry.

[Caleb]

Okay.

[Alyssa]

App, program, software.

[Caleb]

Okay, I get it.

[Ethan]

I get it.

[Alyssa]

Application.

[Caleb]

I get it. Okay. So you did not have a computer?

[Alyssa]

Not one. Because I'm going to be working a lot, so I'm going to.

[Caleb]

What kind of computer did you get?

[Alyssa]

I got a laptop, so I got up.

[Caleb]

What kind of laptop you.

[Alyssa]

Just a standard Lenovo laptop. That's going to be high enough quality. I didn't get the highest.

[Caleb]

I got you. I was just trying to figure that.

[Alyssa]

Out because I'm Going to be doing my schoolwork at work, like on my lunch a lot.

[Caleb]

Just right on this.

[Alyssa]

Zero interest for 90 days.

[Caleb]

When did you get it?

[Alyssa]

Not quite a month ago.

[Caleb]

What's the interest going to be in two months?

[Alyssa]

I have never paid off a progressive lease after 90 days because you guys.

[Caleb]

Are really pushing that limit. Everything's getting worse and worse. You never have until you do. You're 20. You have not had a lot of life. You've literally been able to have debt for two years. I've never had this issue.

[Alyssa]

I've used progressive leasing plenty before.

[Caleb]

You've only had access to debt for two years. You don't understand how this thing is.

[Alyssa]

But the reason I know. The reason I know to be careful with that stuff is because of what my parents went through.

[Caleb]

Like, I get that. But. But the fact that you've only had access to that for two years and think because you haven't it up fully in two years, while this is getting worse and worse with the decades you have left of life, this is dangerous, this mentality you have there, thinking you're going to be okay because everything's been fine for two years. Okay, what's your minimum payment?

[Alyssa]

It's $90, bi weekly.

[Caleb]

Okay. Obviously we want to pay more. Well, is it deferred interest?

[Alyssa]

So he's.

[Caleb]

Is it deferred interest?

[Alyssa]

I don't know what deferred means.

[Caleb]

Okay, does. Is interest accruing right now? And then it all hits at once if you don't pay it off in 90 days, or does interest all of a sudden are accruing on the balance in 90 days?

[Alyssa]

On the balance in 90 days, I think.

[Caleb]

Okay, then we don't have to aggressively pay this off While you have 30% interest on two other cards we have. So.

[Alyssa]

Wait. No, it is deferred. It is deferred. I'm sorry. I'm trying to think, because I'm trying to look at the little estimate in my head of what it says that you're going to pay at a certain time. He's helping me pay for it, though. So every. That's what I'm talking about. Everything we do, we pay together because it's. He said, I'll help you pay for your laptop for school.

[Caleb]

Yeah, but he doesn't. What the.

[Alyssa]

He makes 1800 bucks, but he also doesn't have any other minimum.

[Caleb]

Monthly is 180, but you need to pay 352amonth for two months. Okay. Good luck. Yeah, it's gonna be a hard one when you spend more Money than you make. And 70 goes to. Bullshit. It's just another progressive lease.

[Alyssa]

But this. No. So what's this for? This is his Christmas present that my mom is helping me pay for. So it's in my name, but my mom is helping me pay for it.

[Caleb]

Okay, so we're not gonna say what it is. How do you feel that she's progressively seeing whatever you're gonna get for Christmas? Like, I said, no more Christmas.

[Alyssa]

I did it last year.

[Caleb]

Dude, give him a good glocky. Glocky good. Give her a good finger. Finger and Christmas. Yippee. Happy days. She gave him a really weird look with that. What does that even mean? How do I translate that? Does he not perform well? Oh, girl, hit me with the tea. Girl, hit me with the T. No, hit me with the tea. I love it. I need it.

[Alyssa]

Not that it's not.

[Caleb]

Well, tell me.

[Alyssa]

It's just not often, like, we literally had this conversation in the car right here that, like, it's. It's been almost a month.

[Caleb]

Since what? Since anything.

[Alyssa]

And then before that, it was almost a month.

[Caleb]

Poor Quay.

[Ethan]

I just. I mean, I told her, like. I mean, I.

[Caleb]

Just.

[Ethan]

Not in the mood. Like, it's nothing. It's nothing to do with her because she. She thinks it has something to do with her. And it's not. Like, I just. I don't. Because I see it as.

[Alyssa]

What else am I supposed to. What else am I supposed to think of? Like, you know, do you not think I'm attractive? Do you think I'm fat? Do you think I'm ugly? Do you like to be around me?

[Ethan]

She thinks all that. Like, in past relationships that I've been in, that has been the main focus. And it's like, I don't want. Like, that's the last thing I think about. And when I told her that, she was like that. That doesn't make me feel better.

[Alyssa]

It almost. It makes me feel the same because that means that, like. Does that mean that you don't think I'm attractive enough for you to feel that way all the time? Cause when we got together, it was like, crazy.

[Caleb]

Always is.

[Alyssa]

And I was like, yes, I get it. The honeymoon phase ends.

[Caleb]

Do you try to make moves?

[Alyssa]

Yes. And. But the reason I don't anymore is because 90 of the time he says I don't feel like it.

[Caleb]

Well, that's okay. Take the shots. You get it.

[Alyssa]

Honestly, I don't remember the last time I asked that he said yes.

[Caleb]

Sometimes it's interesting. A thing I learned through an entire Process. Oftentimes there is a yes. You just don't know what that is. This isn't trying to pressure someone into it. He might not want to, and that's.

[Alyssa]

What I told him.

[Caleb]

Like, he might not want to, but ask him what his yes is. He might be down for intimacy without full sex because for what it's worth, listen, I've had stressful moments as well. I've had stressful moments. So I get this, this is, this is something I've, I've had to work on, okay? I, I'm very tired, you know, oftentimes after work, you know, I do a lot. And so I get it. I get it. There's. There is a yes somewhere. Maybe he's. Maybe he's done for a little finger finger. Maybe he's down for making out. Maybe he's down for cuddling with, like, nice words and stuff. So there's oftentimes a yes. So I, I, I don't want you to give up is all I'm saying. I don't want you to get. I'm not saying don't pressure him. That's, that's obviously not the word I'm saying.

[Alyssa]

I don't want him to, like. I don't want you to feel like you have to do something you don't want to do. I never want you to feel that way.

[Caleb]

Yes is if he doesn't have a yes. If that night is just a no, that's okay. But maybe he doesn't want to stick it in. Maybe doesn't want to go crazy, but maybe he's down for some cuddles for a bit, a little bit of.

[Ethan]

And that's why. That's what I told her yesterday. We were talking about it. I was like, you know, I don't.

[Caleb]

Always watch TV together.

[Ethan]

Watch tv, you know, that's not intimacy. Well, I mean, we, we cuddle when we lay down. Like, everything we do, we're.

[Caleb]

But that's not focused on each other. That's focused on the tv.

[Ethan]

Yeah.

[Alyssa]

I mean, and like, we have, like, card game. Because I love card games and stuff. Like, we have couples card games. And I'll be like, we should play this on the ride down to Austin. Do you want to take the regular version or do you want to take the spicy version? He said, I don't care.

[Ethan]

Well. Cause to me, saying I don't care is like, pick what you want.

[Alyssa]

But the amount of times I don't care. Like, I've said, like, give me an opinion. Like, tell me something.

[Ethan]

Like, well, I mean, I can't. I don't know how. I don't know how to give an opinion on something that I really care.

[Alyssa]

That you don't care about this.

[Ethan]

Not that I don't care about it. I just don't care which one you pick. Like, I'm fine with whatever. Like, it's. It's like. It's like saying, if you want to go out to eat here, out to eat there.

[Caleb]

I'm fine with whatever body sometimes does not want to have sex when there's a lot of stress involved and there's a lot of stress involved in your finances and raising two kids.

[Alyssa]

I see it as like, I'm not.

[Caleb]

Blaming either of you for this.

[Alyssa]

Is.

[Caleb]

Sometimes you need to be able to give what your yes is and communicate that it doesn't. You don't have to want the. And I don't want you to give up. And I also don't want you to pressure him either. There are things that can be done, but I understand. I've had stressful times. I get it. It's normal. It's normal. Okay? That's normal. And I want you to think up. I also don't want you to think he's not attracted to you. It's not that. And you just have to. Unfortunately, it's hard, but you just have to take. Take his order. Because usually it's a bodily thing, right? It's not an action that he's doing. It's not buying flowers. It's not something he can just do, you know? So all of a sudden, I want to be horny in that exact moment. So just take the word, listen to it. Try not to internalize it too much. Easier said than done. Talk to someone if you have to, but also stick it in when you're feeling it. Let's go.

[Ethan]

Well, that's what I do, you know, like, if I. If I feel like it, then. Then we'll do it. It's just a lot of times I'm.

[Caleb]

You know, tired or maybe figure out something to get excited. Stick it in her butt. Let's go.

[Alyssa]

We don't like that.

[Caleb]

Hey, you don't like that. But also, I don't want you to do something you don't like. No, I'm just saying, you know, play around, have some fun. But I want you guys to have the health, a healthy relationship, obviously.

[Alyssa]

My mom found the fuzzy handcuffs we got from Spencer's.

[Caleb]

There we go. We love it. Okay, what's your minimum payment on this? 430. 450. 3.90 for the Christmas present of which we don't know. And we're not gonna say I don't.

[Alyssa]

Know my mom usually. Or not that I don't know. It's. So the buy, you're gonna pay it.

[Caleb]

Off before it hits.

[Alyssa]

Yeah.

[Caleb]

And your mom pays it, not you.

[Alyssa]

Because the mom pays it, not you. I help. So how much do you contribute? $60 every time it comes out. Which is bi weekly. So 60bi weekly.

[Caleb]

120Amonth for two months. Okay, so it gets paid off. Okay, good.

[Alyssa]

Because it was higher than this, so it was about 700.

[Caleb]

And this who's best buy card card?

[Ethan]

Mine.

[Caleb]

All right, big guy. You know what's funny? He actually made just like a bigger than minimum through payment when all it is is you throwing them under the bus the whole time. Where he actually made a bigger than a minimum payment, which you did not do on any.

[Alyssa]

But he probably disputed that because most of the. Because he used to have auto pay set up.

[Caleb]

If you're gonna just.

[Alyssa]

That's why I don't do auto pay because like check.

[Caleb]

No, set up auto pay for whatever you want.

[Ethan]

I had set it up, but then I turned it off because I was going to do a different amount. And to do the. For the way that they do it, you have to turn off autopay to change the amount. So I turn it off. But then it. It still went through after I turned it off, after I changed it.

[Alyssa]

I can't remember a single time that was.

[Ethan]

I think the last time I put.

[Alyssa]

Out his Best Buy card though, that he said. He hasn't said my Best Buy card payment got taken out, but it either overdrafted my account or something or he doesn't have enough money for something else. So he has to dispute it. And I mean, granted that has been a decent amount of time, but every time we would talk about a Best Buy card payment, that was it.

[Caleb]

You owe $821 takes four years to pay off minimum payment, 33 bucks.

[Alyssa]

And he told me that that balance.

[Caleb]

Is like a gaming PC.

[Ethan]

No.

[Caleb]

Oh, wait. Oh, both of you do crazy gaming PC. You've done 5k on yours. You've done 3k. And you want to upgrade yours right now?

[Ethan]

That's not a.

[Caleb]

What are we doing?

[Ethan]

Like that's not a full guarantee. It's that much. That's just kind of a rough estimate.

[Caleb]

Yeah, but you want to upgrade right now when you can't afford shit.

[Alyssa]

Well, that's why I haven't upgraded yet. I want to, but I'm not. Have you seen RAM prices?

[Caleb]

No, but I heard it's crazy.

[Ethan]

It's.

[Alyssa]

I haven't bought last year for like 250. Is 900 now Ram.

[Ethan]

I already have my computer, so I'm okay. The tariffs finally hit the.

[Caleb]

Oh, tariffs.

[Ethan]

The ram, the computer market.

[Caleb]

AI. I didn't think AI.

[Ethan]

They're all made in, like, South Korea. So you know everything.

[Caleb]

Every RAM I know Taiwan is.

[Ethan]

Yeah. Every PC component is foreign. So tariffs hit like a mother.

[Caleb]

I'm very confused. $336 in fees this year would essentially say you've had a late fee every month this year. If. Plus extra.

[Ethan]

But have a late fee every month.

[Caleb]

It would have to be cash advances. It would have to be cash advances or late fees or something. Either way, they're all. And it's almost $400 worth.

[Alyssa]

And he used to say that all of my late fees were from before we were together. We've been together all of 20, 25. So how would those all be before we were together?

[Ethan]

Well, those. I literally have no idea what those would be from. Cause I have.

[Alyssa]

And this is what I'm talking about that I look at every day.

[Caleb]

Hundreds of fees. Hundreds of dollars of fees. What are we doing?

[Ethan]

I mean, there was a period where I wasn't paying the card.

[Alyssa]

There's no I mean to that. There's no I mean to that. It's. You're not making the payment when you're saying you're making the payment.

[Ethan]

No, this was like, I've been making the payments.

[Alyssa]

You've been making the payments, but they're always late.

[Ethan]

Not.

[Alyssa]

He has it right there. I didn't know that. You didn't tell me that. That's not.

[Ethan]

What is that showing for this year?

[Alyssa]

That's exactly what you said. I mean, does it count? Like, if you just do your auto pay and then you pay it again, does that count as late because of what?

[Ethan]

No idea. I don't know if that's how that works. If it. If it marks it as late or not.

[Caleb]

Well, you may have had chargebacks when you try to make a payment. You didn't have enough money in your checking account, so it gives you a big whopping fee. That might be basically a late fee.

[Ethan]

That might be it.

[Caleb]

Because just times it's been overdrafted just as bad. Billy thoughts it.

[Alyssa]

It makes me upset because that's what I'm talking about. That. How are we supposed to do anything combined? How am I supposed. Because I was considering. Maybe we should just get a Joint checking account. I didn't want to do anything joint checking account until we were married. But since we pay all of our stuff together, we sell each other back and forth a million times a day when we get paid. Should we just do that? But that makes me feel like I don't want to do that because what if our account then is going to get overdrawn or. Or we're gonna have late fee after late fee Because I don't know what he's doing. I don't know what he has going on on the back end that I can't see. I'm not going to be his mom.

[Caleb]

But one of your motivations that I.

[Alyssa]

Want him to get better.

[Caleb]

One of your motivations that you told Colton is you want to improve your credit score so you can open a brand new card in order to upgrade your PC.

[Alyssa]

And I told. That is one of them. Because I do want to be able.

[Caleb]

In reverse, but that's.

[Alyssa]

I want to be able to pay off my cards and get myself to a sustainable point to where I could handle that I can handle. Because best buy does 12 months interest free. So if I can do it on.

[Caleb]

Dad, it's a risk. It's. Well, you have people to take care of. What are we doing? Okay, Is this a firm or. Klarna. What is this?

[Alyssa]

That's a firm. Who's mine?

[Caleb]

Louise Cosmetics, Amazon. What are we doing? Come on. You know, 600 bucks. I'm sure the minimum is like 200amonth. What? Why? Because that's. And that's what worries me. $600.98. That's what worries me is because all of a sudden, there you go. You're just going into debt. You're paying in four. You're 12 months. Financing. As long as it's, you know, financing out and out, it's okay. I Cosmetics and Amazon.

[Alyssa]

So the cosmetics, that's like all of my makeup for the year.

[Caleb]

So it's still money you can. You do not have that you are putting out there. You can get the fizz card, a debit card that builds credit. That's all I allowed. Okay, well, that's good. Good. Other than that, I'm not allowing any of this that you're doing. This is crazy. Klarna. Affirm. What is this? Fabletics.

[Alyssa]

That's mine. But we are paying it together.

[Caleb]

You're what? What's the account?

[Alyssa]

Klarna.

[Caleb]

Okay. Paying it together. Why?

[Alyssa]

There's stuff for me, him and the boys on there.

[Caleb]

75 monthly payment. Nope. 8871. Okay.

[Alyssa]

Okay.

[Caleb]

And you owe 254. 15. 88.71 Kohl's. Whose? Kohl's card?

[Alyssa]

That's mine. But also both of us paying it.

[Caleb]

Buying Kohl's.

[Alyssa]

It was for auto pay off. I don't do auto pay because I pay all of my stuff manually, which obviously has gotten me further than having auto pay set up and having to cancel every time.

[Caleb]

Because the reason I'm probably, like 25 bucks. Oh, we're 103.56. Okay. Is that all your debt? I just want to make sure because I need to get to this setting because it's pages. It's literally pages. This is insane. Guys, Guys. Who's USAA Checking account? Me. This is all you. What? Oh, my gosh.

[Ethan]

I just saw.

[Caleb]

No, no, no, no, no. Oh, my gosh. Oh. Oh, no, you can't be. Oh. Based on the last conversation, you can't be doing this. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. Guys sometimes get very stressed. I have a lot of work. I get tired, and I have to find my yes. Right? That's what we talk about. I have to find my yes. Maybe I don't want to go full intercourse in that exact day. Okay. I'm a horny person sometimes. It's not always there. It happens. But I don't go and just fap. I make sure when I want to have sex, I have sex with my girlfriend. What is it he's spending a shit ton on? Only. While not her. Well, not being intimate with your. I'm sorry.

[Alyssa]

Nice to know you for that. I guess after you've told me that, because I know he used to do that a long time ago. He said it was before we were together.

[Ethan]

Oh.

[Alyssa]

Why wouldn't you? Like I've told you, you can be honest with me about that stuff.

[Ethan]

I feel like there's just something weird to be honest about.

[Alyssa]

Well, you don't even want to be with me.

[Ethan]

No, it's not.

[Alyssa]

You told me you canceled. It is the point. You told me you canceled. It is the point.

[Ethan]

Yes, and I did.

[Alyssa]

Then why do you have it?

[Ethan]

Because I. I did. Another one.

[Alyssa]

Why? You for that? Honestly, like, genuinely you for that. Because why would you lie to me about that when you don't even want to be with me?

[Ethan]

I never said I didn't want to be with you.

[Alyssa]

Then why would you rather do it somewhere else than with me, that is you directly not wanting to be with me?

[Ethan]

Not really.

[Alyssa]

So then. Then what is it? Then what is it? If you, if it's you doing it and not wanting to do it with.

[Ethan]

Me, I mean, I can get horny when you're not home.

[Alyssa]

But when I've asked you do you do stuff like this in your spare time, you say no.

[Caleb]

Yeah.

[Ethan]

Cause I don't do it all the time.

[Alyssa]

But not doing it all the time doesn't mean that you don't do it. So when I ask, you say yeah, a little bit. Not no.

[Caleb]

Oh, fanfics too.

[Ethan]

I. I don't know what that is because I've looked at it. That's another one. I can't cancel it. Like I've gone to it and I don't even have a subscription on there. And I. Like I've even contacted the support about it.

[Caleb]

I'm sorry.

[Alyssa]

Yeah, I am too. Kind of means that all the reassurance that you do means nothing. You saying you're just not in the mood or you're stressed or you're tired means nothing. That means you're lying to me.

[Ethan]

No, because I don't have it. Just because there's.

[Alyssa]

When is it from? When is it?

[Ethan]

That's from October. It was a one time payment.

[Alyssa]

When? When did you do it?

[Ethan]

In October.

[Caleb]

Why?

[Alyssa]

Why? What was the scenario?

[Ethan]

I don't know. I was out of town.

[Alyssa]

I knew it. I knew it. I knew you were going to do something like that while you were gone. It's fine, it's fine. Keep moving.

[Caleb]

No, it's not. Objectively, I can see it. You're heartbroken. What do you mean? You knew something was gonna happen out of town.

[Alyssa]

I just like, I tried calling him like three times and he didn't answer. And it could have been because I was like work. Yes. And I also texted our roommate and asked what doing? I don't know. He's in the other room.

[Ethan]

Yeah, I was talking with. And that was whenever I told you my phone was charging and we were watching Family Guy.

[Alyssa]

You're. You're just. You're trying to defend yourself when it's.

[Ethan]

No, I'm not trying to defend shit. Whenever. That's actually what happened. Yes, I will admit I did subscribe to it when we were there, but that's not what I was doing when you texted me. I was laying in bed with my phone charging watching Family Guy.

[Caleb]

I can vet it. I can vet it if you lock into your own right now. Show me. I like to see tits. I won't complain if they pop up. Well, we're fans of tits here. I'm sorry. I am sorry. There's a part of me that's kind of struggling here. It's like you both have here top down camera. I mean like this is his bullshit spending. This is going out to eat and pay. 1 page 2 page 3 page 4 page 5 page 6 page 7 page every purchase is. Are you Wells Fargo? And then we look to you for the good finances and you're negative $451.

[Alyssa]

Because I get my.

[Caleb]

Doesn't matter. Your negative $451 because if it was all needs I could be sympathetic. But there's one page of all. Two page of all bullshit. Three page of all bullshit on a little bit of. On the final page.

[Alyssa]

I think the reason it shows that it's negative is because I get an advance on my paycheck. Doesn't matter in advance.

[Caleb]

You were negative while spending everything on. That's the reality.

[Alyssa]

No, like it would have shown.

[Caleb]

No, guys, come on. It doesn't matter. Well, it's all on is the point. Okay, let's see. Oh, and you guys still owe a thousand dollars to your dad for the trip to Buffalo. I thought he paid for it. Okay, thank you. Okay, I get 34, $34 to subscribe to this person. Okay, I'm subscribing. Okay, what am I seeing here? Okay, good, good, good. It's. It's an emo woman taking dick. Okay, very good. Okay. I was concerned for a while because this person's like profile pictures weird and their Twitter looked weird, but it's. Do you want to see? Yeah, it's very, it's okay. But it's an emo woman. Good, good, good. We like that. We love emo. Emo woman with a vagina. Okay, good, good, good, good, good. I'm glad, I'm glad to see. I honestly thought you were into some like weird murder. Gay. Very concerned because it was, it was, it was, it was looking very weird for a moment. It was looking very weird. Okay. All his subs. Okay, I unfortunately think, ladies and gentlemen, that we are going to end this conversation. I'm going to send them to a budgeting the expert that we work with outside of here. Because that's not the issue they're gonna have to deal with. Clearly there is more to work with because in August alone, he purchased 1-23-45 fan subscriptions. September 1 2, 3, 45 separate only subscriptions that were different. He signed up for separate, different accounts that he was not previous. He is. I think he might have a potential. He's subscribing to multiple only Accounts multiple times a month. He's. He's gooning a lot. And I think what we have here more than anything is a relationship issue that needs to be worked on in therapy before we think about the finances. And listen, this is very difficult, and I do not want you guys. I don't want you guys to break up. To be very clear. I want you guys to have a good life together. And I want us to get there, you know, cutting out all the gooniness and stuff that obviously happens in the show. I always wish for the best for our guests, and we will focus on a budget at some point, and I'm going to hook you up with an expert for that and all of our resources, of course. But more than anything. Have you guys seen a couple seraphis?

[Alyssa]

We've seen my therapist together once.

[Caleb]

Maybe a couple therapists, especially that focuses on sex. And you might need to see therapy on your own. I'll pay for the first two sessions. I want you guys to go, please, because we need to focus on healing this relationship and focusing on this relationship first before we can think about the money. Because there's some things going on here. And I think we've seen that through this conversation. Okay, that's what we're doing, guys. Come join us for the post show. Come join us for the post show. Get your hammer. Financial score. Caleb.com. click that join button to join us in the post show. I. I'm sorry, I just. I don't think it's productive, you know, if I'm just being real. Because you're not going to be able to budget and focus on things going forward from here. I know the audience might want to see a budget. It's not about that. It's about you guys. And I want you guys to do well. And I need you to. You guys to sit down with a couple therapists. Maybe that focuses on six, two. And I think you might have some gooning issues. Would you admit to that?

[Ethan]

I mean, not. Not more. No.

[Alyssa]

You.

[Ethan]

Not anymore. No, that was that. It ended that whenever. So whenever.

[Alyssa]

Defend yourself. Why are you trying to defend yourself?

[Ethan]

Whenever I've done it, I would. I would pay for it. I would do it, and then I would never look at it again.

[Caleb]

Can I see your phone? Yeah. Can you open your phone?

[Ethan]

What do you want me to open, too?

[Caleb]

Just open your phone.

[Ethan]

Okay.

[Alyssa]

Is that why you didn't want me to look at that Twitter account?

[Ethan]

No.

[Alyssa]

What was the Twitter account?

[Ethan]

I don't know. Like, I literally. I clicked on it when, like, there was a notification and I didn't look at it.

[Caleb]

All right, join us for the post show. There's obviously a lot more to talk about, but I think this, this part of the conversation is done. Click the join button. Best membership on YouTube. See you there. Wait, so you've been hiding this?

[Alyssa]

Yes. He's not.

[Caleb]

Wait, so you've been hiding porn? Completely.

[Alyssa]

So that's what I told him last night. I don't ask anymore because I'm afraid of you saying no. Because it's not that I have a problem with you saying no. It's that every time I ask, you say no.

[Ethan]

I don't remember you saying no, buddy.

[Caleb]

You this. Join us Saturday, January 31st, for Hammer Elite Day, a five hour live stream featuring all of your favorite shows. But done live with you. See you there.