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B
Plan your beaches escape@aruba.com to watch episodes of Financial Audit a week earlier, check us out on YouTube. This is the shortest I've talked to a guest before we started filming because I don't know what the. To look at your fur collection. How much?
A
I've probably spent at least 12 grand on my fur collection.
B
Hey, yo. What the.
A
You know why I have all this debt is because I know in the future I'm going to have money. I'm destined for it.
B
Please tell me how you're destined for money.
A
My drive, My skill set.
B
Some driven mother.
A
No, that's me. You're talking to them right now, not after this.
B
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A
Hi, my name is Dakota. I'm 23 years old and I'm from Detroit, Michigan, and this is financial audit.
B
I'll be honest, ladies and gentlemen, this is the shortest I've talked to a guest before we started filming because I don't know what the to look at. It's. This is very weird. Also, I've seen furry stuff online.
A
What do you mean by that?
B
I've never seen it in person and it's huge. And it's huge. Well, I think I. I've always had a dream.
A
We've all.
B
We've. We've all had our dreams. Lindsay's had a dream. I've had a dream. My dream's been to get midget A. But Lindsay's dream has been to get a furry. And I believe she has accomplished her dream. There's a chain hanging from her. Okay, well, you.
A
You had mentioned.
B
Are we leaving that on?
A
No, no, no, no. It's going to come.
B
You want to take it off?
A
I would love to take it off.
B
You'd love to take it off? I would love to.
A
It's so hot in here.
B
Take it off.
A
Thank God. Holy.
B
He's a normal looking. This is like when they unmasked Kylo Ren and episode seven. And you thought it was going to be some evil mother.
A
Evil, yes, as far as I know.
B
Well, now I know how to actually look at you. This is the weirdest Star Trek episode I've ever experienced. This is so weird. Okay, well, I guess really establishing. You. You look so normal. Little emo.
A
What'd you expect?
B
Normal A.
A
Tell me.
B
Well, a middle age until you said 23. Fat, greasy weirdo that like has another fat, greasy weirdo that never leaves the basement kind of around a collar that he uses as a pet at home.
A
You should see my girlfriend. She's smoking and she's a furry too.
B
Okay, let me see.
A
Can I use my phone and show you?
B
Yeah, I want to see.
A
She's okay. I'm just saying, like, she's hot.
B
You know, I'm kind of believing it because you're an attractive dude. You're an attractive.
A
Want to see? Yeah, you got to see your face. I guess I can't use one of her in her costume, so here she is right here.
B
Yeah, I don't. The costume does nothing for me. That doesn't really show me what anyone is. Is there another picture? It's a weird angle, you know, I.
A
Guess all of our angles are similar to that.
B
We'll get consent to put these in the episode, ladies and gentlemen. Okay. Yeah. Hey. Yeah. I think you're out of her league, I'll be honest. But that's okay.
A
That's crazy. I'm gonna have to like, talk to her about that when she sees this episode.
B
Sure.
A
You know what?
B
But freaks. Find freaks. And I'm glad you did. Is this what you do for a living?
A
It's some income. It's not most of my income.
B
What comes in from that? And what is that?
A
Job, cameo, social media consultations. And I do only. Oh, my clothes clothed.
B
You said you're taking loads. Okay.
A
No, no, no, no, no. Oh, you look alive.
B
That's the past. Oh, okay. Yeah.
A
I mean, I had to know. I had to make sure that I was actually straight.
B
Oh, it's a good little test. It's a little test.
A
Nothing in, only out.
B
How do you go out if you don't go in?
A
Well, exit only, you know.
B
How do you exit if it's not entered?
A
It's not questions you want the answer to right now.
B
Well, actually it is.
A
Well, here's the thing. I needed to make sure that I was straight because, you know, in the furry fandom, it's a lot of gay people. It's mostly gay people. Probably homophobic. I'm saying I've had sex with two dudes. I can't be homophobic. I've earned the right to say the f. Slur.
B
Did you?
A
You know, at least my co workers that are gay and my friends have said the same thing. I'm allowed to say it because I'm okay. Uh huh. You know, because I know how you guys clip stuff. So I'm just gonna leave it at that. I have sucked.
B
What was it?
A
Mediocre? Not very entertaining. Sorry dad. Probably gonna watch this.
B
What? Is your dad homophobic?
A
Yes. Oh well, Christian.
B
And has a furry son.
A
Yes.
B
Okay, hold on. I need to get your income. What do you make off the social media consultation? I don't know what that.
A
Even so people pay me to basically walk them through their.
B
Walk them to.
A
Yeah, leash them up, all that. And then they ask me on how to prepare their socials for success and I get them.
B
Are you successful on social media over.
A
The last few years? Over the last eight years I've averaged probably eight years.
B
You're 23?
A
Yeah, I've been doing social media since 2016, 2015 maybe so almost 10 years.
B
I don't know if that's good for society.
A
No, no. I mean a lot of my associations.
B
When you were that young.
A
Yeah, I was making money though, you know, not anymore.
B
I still don't know if that's good. You're okay.
A
Good.
B
What do you make from that?
A
Well now, like right now I'm making probably an extra 600, $700 a month just from social media. Not including my full time gig, which is.
B
Oh wait, is that including of two and everything?
A
Yeah.
B
Oh, 700 combined social media.
A
Yeah, I've, I've, I've fallen quite a bit from what I was.
B
Why, what happened?
A
Guy? Lazy relationship, Bad decisions. Current one? No, no, my new one's great.
B
Very happy new one. Okay.
A
Yeah, very happy. Very, very blessed. All around.
B
Strategically groomed, got everything we needed. Okay. And what's your day job? And do they Know. They know because they certainly do now.
A
Yeah, no, my managers are aware of why I'm here, my social media history.
B
What do you do?
A
I'm a server.
B
Well, that was the thing you didn't want to say. So we're bleeping the name of the company. But it's a large chain restaurant, our chain restaurant. It's a very good one, for what it's worth.
A
It is.
B
I very much enjoy it. I will say it's funny how I have to cut the thing you don't want to say and then you say the thing you don't want to say.
A
I ramble.
B
It's okay. Serving. How many hours a week are you getting?
A
Oh, I could pick up as much as I want, but I average about 36 for 44 hours.
B
What are you making?
A
About 1200 to 1500 a week?
B
Yeah, 1200, 1500 a week. Ladies and gentlemen, chain chains in Detroit.
A
On three table sections too.
B
So we'll say average 14 then. Cuz you said 13 to 15, right? Yeah, times 52, divide that. Well, do you work every week of the year?
A
No, I take time off for furry conventions.
B
And it's not paid. And it's not paid time off?
A
No, absolutely.
B
How many weeks do you take off a year?
A
Say probably on like in total, about like five.
B
Okay, very good. So I'll times this by 47, 65, 800 a year without the social media stuff, which I mean you're actually doing a, you're, you're, what are you getting cougars that just want to grab the twinks?
A
No, no, no. I just, I, I have terrible spending habits. So it's like that money?
B
No, no, no. Your income, like it's really good. We're talking.
A
Oh, you mean like my tables?
B
$5483 a month plus your 700. Like you're killing.
A
I, I, yeah, I'm just a very person.
B
Especially in a cheap city like Detroit. $6,183. Like wow. A month. Incredible. At 23. This is the career. This is the career to do, apparently. Why are you doing so well? Do you know? Well, for what it's worth, we're not saying the place, but that there is not a time I do not go to that place. And it's not literally stacked.
A
Yeah.
B
Like they've killed it. They've killed it. My goodness. I don't know what they've done.
A
Just good food, you know, consistent quality, that's all it takes.
B
Yeah. No, but why are you doing so well?
A
Because I'm a kick Server? Yeah, I've been doing it off and on for about four and a half years. I've always been people front. Before I was a server, middle between serving jobs, I was a director of marketing at a luxury car dealership for three years. And that involved.
B
Second time we've had that. What the.
A
In front of people.
B
Okay.
A
So I've always just had a professional way to approach people.
B
Okay.
A
You know, learn their situations and how I should approach it from there and cater their experience to how they are.
B
Now, I gotta note that, you know, it's a little early in the day, you may have skipped breakfast, so I wanted to make sure we fed you a snack.
A
That's crazy. You know, I'm not even offended that it's in a dog bowl. I'm more so offended that it's not Fruity Pebbles or anything else other than Cocoa Puffs. I'm not doing this because it's in a dog bowl.
B
I am.
A
Pretty good.
B
So how you doing then? Because honestly, to me, you should be killing it. Is that what comes home or is that before taxes?
A
I think the tax conversation is a whole different situation.
B
Well, no tax on tips.
A
Yeah, no tax on tips. But I haven't filed taxes in three years, so I don't really know anything about my tax situation. Kind of just hope for the best. Why?
B
Why the. Possibly because I'll figure it out later. No, no.
A
They do pay IRS for everything.
B
The IRS will figure it out now.
A
Well, they can't take my cash, but.
B
They can take your paycheck.
A
I don't get a paycheck at all.
B
Your full tip.
A
Checkmate. I get like 60 bucks a week in hourly.
B
Yeah, and they'll fully take that. I know. It's not the. I know.
A
That's not even a gas tank.
B
Fine. They show up with guns.
A
I got guns too.
B
Well, it is Detroit. You should. Yeah, but I think there is a bigger and involve a nuclear arsenal.
A
If they nuke me for not paying my whatever my back taxes or whatever the I owe them, that's on them.
B
I think they want to nuke Detroit.
A
That's okay. I'm not in Detroit for long, so. Stop.
B
Where are you going? You're doing so well there.
A
Back to Dallas.
B
But you're doing so well.
A
I was doing better in Dallas.
B
Yeah, but for cost of living. Were you? Because it's much more expensive. Dallas.
A
I was paying twenty three hundred dollars for a two bedroom apartment.
B
But that was also just like girlfriend's coming. How long have you guys been together?
A
Almost a full year. Now, we've known each other for a little over three years.
B
Okay, so she's coming?
A
Yeah, absolutely. She wants to move to Texas. It's not just me. Why? Better economy. It's warmer. Dude, all of our friends are there family this summer?
B
So miserable. You don't. Okay. Okay. Well, well done. Why are you completely. Because you don't come on the show unless you're completely. Well, one. Why haven't you paid your taxes? Let's talk about that. Like, why?
A
I just didn't want to. I remember filling it out.
B
Want to because you probably. Especially with no tax on tips, I don't think you'd pay very much.
A
Just passed the no tax.
B
Yeah, that's new. But even still.
A
But we're also thinking of.
B
Fine. Have you gone through the process and see what you might owe? Because it's not like you were claiming your cash anyway.
A
Well, I went through the, you know, whatever. Turbo tax, and it said I owed them nothing. So when I.
B
There you go. So just. Duke.
A
I submitted it. They sent me an email saying that this form was incomplete, and then I just kind of ignored them and hoped that they would figure it out later.
B
Three years in a row.
A
Yeah. I didn't even bother to try to apply two years ago because of the income I was taking in. I was scared, so.
B
Yeah, but you weren't claiming your cash. No one claims their cash.
A
Well, this wasn't cash. This was $20,000 a month in Zelle payments that I'm hoping I don't have to pay on. Because they consider it gifts.
B
Not after this.
A
I knew the risks.
B
I know everyone does.
A
Yep. 20,000amonth in Zelle payments from what? My ex girlfriend.
B
She was giving you 20amonth?
A
It was the.
B
Okay.
A
She was taking 20. I was down 20. Kind of. Yeah. It was our only.
B
Oh, you were her.
A
I was her manager, her content lead, her producer, her cameraman, or everything. But there's no other people involved. I was not a.
B
But you were f. Cking her.
A
I was paid peanut. Paid Furry Peanut. When did making plans get this complicated? It's time to streamline with WhatsApp, the secure messaging app that brings the whole group together. Use polls to settle dinner plans, send event invites and pin messages so no one forgets. Mom, sleep 60th and never miss a meme or milestone. All protected with end to end encryption. It's time for WhatsApp message privately with everyone. Learn more@WhatsApp.com.
B
And you said that was a bad, toxic relationship?
A
Extremely. How much did you make in total? In the 8 or 9 months we were running of probably a little over $135,000 because we had peaked at 40k a month for the last 21 a half ish months we were together. We were only doing like 12, 15, 20,000 up until then.
B
As if that's not incredible money.
A
Well, I was also making $7,000 a month flat for my salary based job that I had left to pursue. The only crazy.
B
Okay, let me see her.
A
I don't even know if I could pull her up.
B
You know her Instagram.
A
I'm blocked. I could show you her mugshot.
B
I can pull up her Instagram.
A
She got arrested for assault with a deadly weapon, by the way.
B
To who? Yes, let's see that.
A
Boyfriend after me.
B
Oh, yep, she doesn't sound great. Let's see that. But I also want to see her Instagram.
A
Oh yeah, you could look her up. You're not blocked.
B
No, of course not.
A
By the way, her entire platform is because of me.
B
Don't worry, ladies and gentlemen, we will not be doing.
A
There is the mugshot. The famous one. She looks awful in this picture.
B
Yeah, most do in their mug shots.
A
But yeah, it was her new boyfriend. She's had three partners since me in about a year.
B
Okay, blur the name. Well, here we go. This is what we're dealing with currently. I believe I'm blocking the name.
A
She's a bad example.
B
I don't like social media promotion.
A
She is a bad example.
B
Not that attractive. I'll be honest. To me, to me, to me, to me, to me. Before she rages online. Oh my gosh. To me. My type.
A
Well, aren't you married or in a relationship?
B
I'm married, but yes, I am dating.
A
Okay, Is she out of your league?
B
What? I can't find people. Yeah, okay, come on.
A
I'm just making sure we're on mutual playing field here.
B
No, she's out of my league. You're out of your current league.
A
Okay, okay, I disagree. But that's okay.
B
So how long did you do furry of.
A
Mid 2023 to towards the end of 2024.
B
So you're like 20? Yeah, to 2024. Okay, so not very long. Where'd all that money go? Because again, you're, you're on the show. You're.
A
I'm. Yeah, no, I, I. Okay, so.
B
And you're doing well now.
A
I put $10,000 down for my current vehicle.
B
I. You did not just go and go get crazy vehicle cuz you're making some of money.
A
I wouldn't say crazy. It's a Lexus LS 460. 2012.
B
Lexus is nice.
A
It was only a $15,000 car.
B
But you put 10 down.
A
Yes. Okay. I wanted low payments, low rate.
B
That's good. So why are you then? Cuz that wouldn't equal car.
A
Has nothing to do with my. It's my credit card payments, my qualify, my affirm, my k. I actually rented my car rental to get here. So you know how you can. You know you're already renting a car. I'm affirming the rental payment on my car, on my 2025 hatchback that I'm here for.
B
Why?
A
I just didn't want to spend the 300 up front, so I paid 80 up front. Makes sense to me.
B
It does. Is there interest on it?
A
Nope.
B
Pay it off in six weeks.
A
Okay.
B
You pay it off every time. No questions asked, no problems, no late fees as I go through this entire thing.
A
Yes, everything is on time. I have always been successful on that. Besides my one missed auto payment on my Best Buy card like three and a half years ago.
B
Oh, I guess your ex was very. Has a negative image in the furry community.
A
Yeah, she is a piece of. Total piece of.
B
Why?
A
Transphobic, racist, ableist, fat phobic, everything under the sun.
B
Which I think that that community specifically is all those.
A
No, no, no. Usually. Right.
B
Usually.
A
There's bad apples. There's bad apples in every fandom. There's bad apples in anime.
B
No, no. Isn't your. What are the furry. I couldn't think of it. Aren't they all fat, trans and.
A
No, no, I would say it's a. It's a decently sized demographic of that genre of people. No disrespect, but the people like that stick out like me. Like how you said when I took my suit head off, it wasn't what you expected. That's changing.
B
Well, you might be trans. I don't know.
A
Not that I know of. So check back next year. Seems like it happens overnight.
B
Does it? You're starting to sound like her.
A
That might be the worst thing you'll say to me today.
B
Okay, so what is going on, my guy? Cause what an interesting conversation.
A
Well, you know why I have all this debt is because I know in the future I'm gonna have money. I'm destined for it.
B
How are you destined for it? Please tell me how you're destined for money.
A
My drive. My skill set. And how many times I've come across.
B
Bars, some driven motherf ers who are the absolute biggest morons in the world. And work on work instead of actually doing what it takes to get somewhere.
A
Yes. No, that's me. You're talking to him right now.
B
Well then no, you're not destined for money.
A
Oh, but it's, it's. But here's the thing. So I've come across large sums of money multiple times in my youth. I. And 17 years old. I took home $45,000 in a little over 45 days.
B
Okay. And it's not here. Meaning I don't think you're gonna come into money and keep it.
A
Well, I know, that's, that's why I'm here. You know, I gotta have a little wake up call. I gotta get the hammer treatment. I gotta get hammered.
B
So no, no, no.
A
I gotta experience the hammer in full stand. But you know, it's gonna happen again. And every time it happens, I'm gonna say I'm gonna keep it.
B
But why?
A
What.
B
What if you've lost your opportunity? What if that opportunity has hit and now you're done? No, because a lot of the things also has to do with the fact that, you know, you're younger and, you know, attractive, but you're gonna be aging.
A
And those opportunities are still coming. Don't worry about. I know that.
B
Go on, tell me.
A
I just. I manifest them. And once I'm back in Dallas, here's the goal. I need to get the out of Detroit. There's nothing Detroit keeping you.
B
I agree. Detroit's not great.
A
Exactly. The only reason I'm in Detroit is for my beautiful, lovely girlfriend. Soon to be wife. And that is.
B
You're engaged.
A
No.
B
Okay.
A
Eventually what I need to do is get the out of Detroit. That's big. Step one. Step two is to get back into Dallas and do a career that I actually have growth potential in. Because I went from a lot coordinator to a social media marketing director in a span of three years with my resume. They fired a woman with a bachelor's degree in marketing to replace. Have me replace her.
B
Yeah, I don't care about. Someone's degree is the only one they can deliver.
A
I could deliver. I've proven to deliver multiple times.
B
What were you making in that job?
A
A little over 70k.
B
Okay, but that's not coming into millions, which is what you're making it sound like.
A
No, I mean, it's about no for your age.
B
That's great. You're doing great right now with no degree. Income wise, not finances. And again, it's not necessarily about a degree. Okay, but I thought you, you were making it sound like you were Gonna come into that 20,000 hours a month again.
A
No, I'm not saying it's impossible. All it takes is the right person to, you know, get to know me and pick me up, because I have that skill set.
B
Oh, so it's all dependent on other people, not yourself?
A
Also that I do the consultation that I hope picks up eventually. Hope, yeah.
B
No, strategy. I.
A
Somewhat of a strategy. I mean, I wrote a 16 page document that walks people through what I did to repeat social media success. And it worked. It's worked for a couple actually known household name furries in the community.
B
Household name?
A
Yeah.
B
How big is that? What is that, like 10,000 people know them?
A
No, we're looking at like half a million to over a million. The Furry fandom is a lot bigger than you might expect it to be. They're actually flying out one of my previous students to Brazil, all expense paid to be a guest of honor at a furry convention in Brazil next year.
B
Yeah, a guest of honor at a Furry convention.
A
At a Furry convention.
B
That doesn't mean it's big itself. This is the Furry convention. Okay, So I can't help you hope and manifest for more money. I know that's not how that goes.
A
I need you to tell me, stop spending money and.
B
Okay, you already know that. Then you just said it. So what do you need me for?
A
How can I get it stuck? Because I've got this. This thing in my brain that tells me I'm going to have this money. I'm going to make this money back. I don't care. Like, just Yesterday, I spent $1,000 an email, Marcus. On a credit card.
B
What? Yeah, but for what? Oh, what are you doing?
A
Well, I have these on shades. I bought a hoodie.
B
I don't know what that is. You're going to have to tell me what that is.
A
This is designer brand.
B
Of what?
A
Of sunglasses. And then I bought a hoodie for 300. Then I bought $350. Cologne, mind games, Gambit.
B
Show me.
A
Well, this is just glasses. I didn't bring the other stuff.
B
How much was it?
A
These?
B
Yes.
A
Little over 300.
B
That's off white. That looks very black to me.
A
Well, but don't they look badass? I'm sure.
B
Okay. Lindsey likes them. I don't know. I'm not a sunglasses guy. I'm a normal glasses guy. I don't know.
A
She told me early on that she liked them, so I was like, see? Worth my money.
B
Oh, okay.
A
And now I can use these on social media later and be happier with what I post. Which makes my content perform better. So it's an investment into oneself.
B
Now, imagine if you invested that $20,000 a month you were making. Yeah.
A
I wouldn't be here right now.
B
You would probably be borderline approaching, what, a half a million dollars? Yeah. $750,000.
A
Yeah.
B
Has it grown? Actually. And from when you're making it, when the market was down to now, you actually might be a millionaire. Technically, your net worth is.
A
I don't own my car. You can't include financed assets to your car.
B
Right.
A
Or into your net worth.
B
So I probably in an equity position, I would allow. Yeah, sure.
A
Probably worth, like, $3,500.
B
Dude, you have to be negative. There's no way. Look, private student loans can make you feel like you're one missed payment away from selling your grandma's heirlooms. We miss you, Grandma. Y Refi says chill out. No more sacrificing the family jewels. They don't reduce you to a credit number. They actually want to see if you actually plan on paying them. And by the way, they're providing interest rates under 6%, which is practically a unicorn in the student loan jungle. I mean, some lenders want to charge so much that you'd swear they're putting your firstborn on a layaway. You tired of monthly payments so high you can't afford a single sweet treat? Y Refi has gotcha. They'll rearrange your payment plan, ease the monthly hit, and even let your poor co signer off the hook. Mom or dad can finally breathe. Oh, and if you think you'll just get stuck in a call center, guess what? 4.6 stars. And Google says, why Refi actually picks up and treats you like a real human shocker, right? In finance, that's about as rare as me not slamming the desk every single episode. So if you're done fantasizing about robbing a bank, don't do that. By the way, check out why Refi? They're here to help you actually crush these loans without selling your kidneys on the black market. Head to yrefy.com hammer that is yrefi.com hammer or call 889-733-978. That is 889-733-978. And see how a real personal approach can help you escape the private loan nightmare. Because let's be honest, living with crippling debt until you're 90 is not the retirement plan you dreamed of.
A
Oh, well, yeah, I'm definitely negative. But as far as I can sell, I got, like, 35 yeah, but it's what you owe. Well, this is worth seven grand, so I could get seven. What? Yeah.
B
For why?
A
Custom made. He's a very notable figure in the fandom. People do pay for that.
B
Who is he?
A
His name Spiral. If I go to a fur. I know you don't give a about this because it's a furry convention. If I go to a furry convention, I get treated like how you do in public. Oh, Caleb Hammer. Let me get a picture. You know that's me at furry conventions. Oh, my God.
B
Because of a $7,500 thing?
A
Because of my. My platform. I'm creator. I've got 960k on Tik Tok. I've got what? Yeah, I've got 34k.
B
Okay, pull up your Tik Tok. I'm not allowing him to plug it, so you're not going to see it. But I need to see.
A
That's a dead page. I don't post it on anymore. Here.
B
Okay, so why are you getting recognized at places?
A
Because I started over with this.
B
Show me the new one.
A
Okay.
B
I don't care about the one that's dead that no one knows you from.
A
Well, I'll pull up my. I'd rather show you my Instagram.
B
Dang. Yeah. Okay. Your Instagram. Okay. 34,000.
A
Yeah. Oh, I know.
B
He bragged about the debt account.
A
The debt account? Yeah, it's just. It's just what people know me for. It's. It's what I came into the fandom as. It's like, oh, look, furries can be normal people. Furries are your everyday average Joe. They're not just fat neckbeards that stay at home when they're moms.
B
I'm not calling you your everyday average Joe. You don't really seem like that. You're.
A
You said I look normal.
B
Your face.
A
Yeah. Do I appear. I mean, so far I feel like I appear pretty normal. Just with a up outlook on money. Everything else.
B
You know what's up, why don't you change it? I'm so confused.
A
That's the fun part. I just don't think I can.
B
Huh?
A
I've tried.
B
How?
A
For like, the last eight years, I've been burning into my head, next time I have money, I'm gonna do this next time.
B
So what if you told yourself the next time you had money you needed.
A
To do, invest it or spend my debt?
B
Then what happened?
A
Bought a motorcycle. I bought two motorcycles, BMWs, designer clothes, jewelry, fur suits. I've probably spent.
B
Yeah, your consumerism to the max.
A
Oh, yeah. And I plan on getting the new iPhone 17 next week.
B
Well, that within itself isn't the worst thing if it stands alone, but mixed on everything. And why are you gonna do that after coming on this show?
A
Investment for my social medias.
B
No. What is that?
A
It's a 15 Pro Max.
B
Shut the up. You're fine.
A
But it's cracked.
B
I don't care. Mine's cracked. I'm living.
A
Oh, I could tell it was cracked. It's kind of a turn off for me.
B
I don't care if you're turned on or off.
A
I'm turned off.
B
Other people richer than you'll ever be in your entire life. I don't care if you're turned off.
A
What do you drive?
B
Huh?
A
What do you drive?
B
Model X. Yeah.
A
Pin your finance stuff. Doesn't matter for me. But your phone's cracked. I didn't like the look of it and I know.
B
So you judge everyone's net worth, not on math, but their car. I'm not a flashy guy.
A
I know. Tesla's pretty flashy. You could say all day. It's not. A Tesla is flashy.
B
It doesn't look flashy.
A
It looks pretty flashy.
B
What Model X looks like? It's like a spaceship inside.
A
No engine noise. And every time you hit the accelerator, it just goes, yay. You know, because it's. It's electric. I'll never buy an electric car.
B
Yes. Faster than any car you have.
A
It doesn't matter. A Bugatti. It might be a little bit faster than a Bugatti. Take it down the highway. You're getting smoked.
B
It's so much more fun to go fast.
A
I've been in a plaid. It's okay.
B
I just like to go fast.
A
Is yours a plaid?
B
Not my current one.
A
So more money than I'll ever have. But you don't have the best Tesla.
B
Well, why would. I'm moving to New York City. I don't want to use a car. Oh, God.
A
Okay. New York City. Why?
B
I can walk places and just constantly running into people.
A
Can't drive. So you're going to get rid of your car is what I'm hearing.
B
Yeah. I don't want to drive. Why would I want to drive? I want to live in a community, like, in public transport or walking around or biking or. Welcome to living in an area that's built for humans and not vehicles.
A
I feel like you're just, like, on a script at this point because, like, all these people define success. I'm going to move to New York.
B
You know, no, I'm literally. I don't give a shit about the city as the city. I care about it for the community and moving and it's built for humans.
A
Is there a benefit to you besides not having your.
B
Yes, it's built for humans and not highways and cars.
A
I don't. I don't like the humans in New York. Not where I would want to be.
B
Well done. Don't go.
A
I will, but I'm not going to live there. It's a vacation place. It's like la.
B
God forbid at any point I wouldn't want to live in la.
A
Okay, we agree with that.
B
Built for cars, not humans. Okay, so you define your entire existence on whatever car you have?
A
I wouldn't say that. I'm just saying, like, Tesla says a lot about a person.
B
What does it say?
A
You have a girlfriend, right?
B
Yes.
A
Okay, she. Back to the trans conversation. She a girl? Like, born female? Yes, is what they say.
B
Yes. Yes.
A
Okay. I'm just making sure, because when I think Tessa, I think gay.
B
He's homophobic.
A
No, like I said, gentlemen, I know a lot about my sexuality.
B
His ex rubbed off on him quite.
A
Heavily, I guess you could say that.
B
He rubbed him off and then he left a homophobic.
A
Well, the rubbing off was for the only, not for my personality.
B
Um, I mean, that's fine. I mean, everyone can lick whatever car they want. Like, there's not much for me to desire to even defend a Tesla. Like, I'm going to drive what I want, right?
A
Well, yeah, of course.
B
I like that it drives for me.
A
Yeah, that's cool.
B
And then I don't have to think. Just listen to a podcast. Yeah, you can.
A
And it just goes, sit there and look at gay drive.
B
Sure, why not? It's not my preferred.
A
But it's on there. You said it's not your preferred. So it's on the list of things you'll watch. It's just not the first thing you'll watch.
B
No, not really, but play it back. Yeah, you. Okay. Play it back.
A
It's not your preferred.
B
And here's the thing about me, right?
A
Is like.
B
I think the gayest thing a guy can do, besides take a dick and say is be offended if someone ever questions his sexuality, because I don't give a. Well, that's like, confident in my masculinity, that if someone questions me, I don't feel like a little.
A
Well, how do you know?
B
But you have to use it as a way to try to get under my skin. But it doesn't affect me Because I don't care.
A
How do you know? How do you know?
B
How do I know?
A
That's how I had to do. I didn't know. I was struggling. I was like, what if I am gay? What if I am not?
B
I'm not going into the lore of my life with you. You're on financial audit.
A
Well, I thought that, you know, we're talking conversation, right?
B
I was telling you. Trying to move on.
A
Okay, let's move on. Oh, yeah, I like that idea. I'm trying to talk about the numbers.
B
No, you're not. You are literally not right now. I have to turn on the fish tank. I got distracted by walking in to your existence.
A
That happens.
B
Okay, so you're going to be very rich and you're going to let everyone know by the car you drive because you care more about what the person next to you with the stoplight thinks. Then what's your actual net. Net worth? Right. Okay, very good. Anything else I should know?
A
No, I.
B
Well, I have a money source that you ran into once you made money through an Instagram scam.
A
Not a scam, not the way to word it. I was getting. It was a paid service that people got what they paid for and they only paid upon completion. It was never payment upon. Oh, I'm going to do this. It was paid after I succeeded.
B
Tell me.
A
So Facebook had a exploit to get people unbanned. Because I'm sure you work on social media. You're where meta has terrible support systems. Unless you give them thousands and thousands of dollars for meta verified, and the more you pay, the more they help you out.
B
Meta verified, isn't that like $5, $10 a month?
A
Yes, but if you use the ad system, this is the exploit. The more you pay through their support system. So if I'm giving them a hundred dollars to promote one of my posts, and then I go to their support system, they're going to say, this guy is a high ticket. We're going to help him farther. So what I would do is I would spend money on ads and then I would say, hey, my page got banned at insert handle. It was a page with 13 million followers. And this person approached me saying it wasn't my page. And he said, I need you to get my page unbanned. I'll pay you set amount if you succeed. I got him unbanned. He paid me $7,500. And from then I realized this is an actual thing. And then I did it for a little over a month and a half and made a little over 45k.
B
Then why would you stop?
A
Because there was a ban wave that happened and I do have a sense of moral compass, as much as it might not look like it. I felt bad for the people that I negatively affected and I pulled out of it.
B
What? You banned people?
A
I didn't ban people. Facebook.
B
How'd you give. Oh, the people you unbanned got banned.
A
Every single person. I got unbanned. And then people extended past them on their devices.
B
I mean, you used a way to like, navigate their ban system.
A
Of course.
B
Of course it's fair that they got rebanned, isn't it?
A
Yeah, well, I'm saying it sucks, but I stopped to prevent that from happening again. I didn't want to people over any further than I'd already had.
B
Want to know a dirty little secret? And no, I'm not starting an Only you're not broke because you suck with money. You just can't see where it's going. If your bank account is empty at the end of every month, that is not bad luck. That is bad tracking. And it's exactly why I use Dollarwise. It shows you exactly where your money's going every single month. Spending subscriptions and savings all in one simple dashboard. Everything you need and nothing you don't. And when you download Dollarwise Today, you'll get six to try for free, plus three months for just $9.99 so you can finally take control and save. See what your money's been doing behind your back. Click below to get started. All right, well, give me your what you think your finance score is. 0 to 10. 0 being the worst, 10 being the best.
A
2.
B
2. Okay. If you want to know your financial score, your Hammer Financial score, take the assessment for free@caleb hammer.com. see where you stand. See where you need to do better, where you're doing really bad, where you're doing really well. And if you don't want to be like a guest who ends up on the show, make sure you download the Dollar Wise budgeting app. It is my preferred budgeting app. It's incredible. Take the free trial and if you like it, sign up for the annual version. Save a lot of money by doing that, and when you do, I will personally send you my budget friendly cookbook. I'll sign it and I'll mail it directly to you. All right, let's jump into these documents. Yep. Here's Neiman Marcus. Except you just said you spent a on this, right? Yeah. What's the new balance of your Neiman Marcus?
A
Probably a little over 1100, 1200 now.
B
Why. Why'd you need to do all this?
A
I didn't need to. Nobody needs to do anything. I just wanted to.
B
Wanted to. But you're also. At the same time, you keep telling me how you want to get your together and manage your finances better when you get out of debt.
A
I can't move to Dallas without getting my together.
B
Then why are you going to Neiman Marcus? Like you want it, but you also want to move to Dallas. Which one do you want more?
A
My psychiatrist had a word for it. Mania, Something like that. Unmedicated mania. Unmedicated.
B
Medicated.
A
Not medicated. I'm on. I'm on Adderall for adhd, but nothing else for, like, bpd. And she says that that's why my spending is the way it is.
B
So you should medicate it, potentially. You need to get it under control, correct?
A
Yes, clinically, by the way.
B
So why are you not.
A
I feel like SSRIs are such a plague in this sense.
B
SSRI, that's what we're advocating for. Pull up your card. Pull up the statement on your phone.
A
Okay.
B
Yeah.
A
I just don't want to be on medication for the rest of my life that I already.
B
Well, that's fine. Maybe you being on Adderall is making you go crazy.
A
Well, I only take this on days like this, where I have to, you know, live.
B
Did you take it yesterday when you spent a thousand? Nope.
A
Wouldn't have stopped me. Okay, so it hasn't updated yet. It still shows 367. Oh, but you could see, you could subtract the available credit, which is a $2,000 limit, to see my purchases from yesterday.
B
Oh, Neiman Marcus. Neiman Marcus. Yeah. 634 and then 248.
A
Hoodie was, too.
B
What's your new minimum payment, you think? I don't know. I'm gonna say it's 40 bucks.
A
It's better than my freedom.
B
Disgusting. Yeah, I'm sure it is. That's so. It's just so stupid. I just don't understand, because I get it. You did it. Maybe you did it in some kind of mania. Maybe you did in some kind of. Maybe you're bipolar. I don't. No, it doesn't matter to me. You still did it. But you also want to move to Dallas. What do you want more?
A
I want to move to Dallas. It's very important to me.
B
Then return this. Can you?
A
I don't know.
B
Was it here?
A
Yeah, it was in north park in Dallas. I drove here from Dallas to get Here after I flew in from Michigan. But I can't return the cologne. That's a given, you know? Already sprayed that one.
B
How much was that?
A
350.
B
Good. I don't even notice it, man. What are you putting on?
A
A few hours ago.
B
Well, if it's a good clone, it should be good. Then.
A
Yeah, I'm a good smelling person. I. That's. That's.
B
I'm not saying you're a bad person.
A
That's something valuable.
B
It's cologne or moving to Dallas. How much do you need to move to Dallas? What have you established you need to move to move to Dallas, I need to go positive.
A
First, I need to pay off my debts. I don't want to have these insane.
B
How much debt do you have?
A
I think somewhere in the ballpark. Range of 25 to 30,000. Dollars?
B
Yeah. $25,313. How the are you paying that off when you.
A
And that's not including. I don't think that includes my $9,000 of property debt.
B
What?
A
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B
What did you do, go around chew everything up and piss on everything?
A
I. No.
B
Not a bad boy.
A
I couldn't afford the apartment after me and my partner split, so I just kind of left.
B
She left the apartment? You didn't leave?
A
I kicked her out.
B
Okay. And she wasn't on it.
A
She was on the lease, but she was a secondary, so I removed her. No.
B
Yeah. Okay. When was that? How long has this been? How long have you owed this?
A
October 2024 was the end of my lease. Mm.
B
It's been a whole year.
A
I can't rent.
B
How are you then?
A
My girlfriend.
B
You're just renting from your girlfriend?
A
No, no, no. I'm on the lease. I am on as a secondary. She was already approved in a place, and then I just couldn't.
B
Go get a place yourself?
A
Yeah.
B
So she's gonna get the place.
A
She'll get approved for it. With her income?
B
With her income? Is her income good? Yeah. What does she do?
A
She's a test driver.
B
Is she gonna be a test driver there?
A
She can.
B
She can transfer that's a good industry in. Yeah, in Dallas. Cause I know Detroit's like the car place.
A
Yeah, well, Dallas has a major car scene with the dealerships. You know, I don't know about manufacturing, but she doesn't need to be a manufacturer. She's.
B
Oh, it's for dealerships, not hers.
A
Right now is not. But she can go to a dealership.
B
Will it pay as much more? What does she make?
A
18 hour, you know, so you won't.
B
Be able to get approved for very much with that.
A
We can get approved for bare bones until I get everything figured out with situation.
B
So you have all that and then plus.
A
Yeah, we have, but I'm not giving them nine grand. I'm gonna settle like two years from now and call them and say, I'll give you three grand and you're gonna.
B
Well, hopefully they accept it. Yeah, it might not. Is it in a collection?
A
It's in collections.
B
Is it in a collection agency or is it owed to the apartment?
A
Collection agency.
B
Okay, well, yeah, they might be willing to negotiate a bit more. And it's been in collections for about a year probably. Yeah, six months. Because I don't know how long until just about collections. Dude, this makes no sense. Again, this is. Your priorities are just out of whack. You want to move to Dallas, you need to get positive to move to Dallas. But you already have $35,000 of debt sanity when we include that collections. And you don't put any money that you overspent. Like you overspent. It wasn't insane. For what it's worth, like we ever spent a few hundred dollars.
A
It's things I feel like I need, but it's still.
B
But it's. You needed to cologne.
A
I'm in the service industry. I need to smell good for my customers, you know, my guests.
B
I don't think anyone wants to be smelling a bunch of scents when they're wanting to eat food.
A
They do. I get comments all day. Cause I put it on my wrists when I'm reaching across, you know. Oh my God, you smell lovely. My tip percentage averages goes up when I smell good.
B
I'm sure they want your tip.
A
Maybe I don't judge.
B
Fuck, man. Okay. Okay. So I want to understand your mindset a little better. Tell me about yesterday because it was 350 on sunglasses. 350 on a hoodie. 350 on cologne. 250% insane. 200 and fifty. Okay, so walk me through where your mind was yesterday as you were going into this.
A
Okay, so the first Thing was I wasn't going to buy anything. And then it transitioned into. Because my buddy had bought something into, okay, well, my Neiman Marcus card is my lowest balance and I have room on it. And I was like, oh, I'm about to lock in after this thing today where I'm at now with you. I do that a lot. I'll make up for unspent money by spending a lot. Knowing that I'll probably lock in after the fact and get it paid down. And I use spending as my motivation to lock in. Like, the more I spend, the higher my payments go, the more money I have to make. The more I actually have to go to work, the more I have to save. It's kind of my motivation.
B
Just tell me yesterday though, I want to put me in your mind. You're there. What's happening?
A
I saw this hoodie. I touched the hoodie. Felt very good. Felt like a thousand dollar hoodie. Was 250. I only had $300 on my Neiman Marcus card.
B
Fucks sake.
A
With $1,700 left over. And I was like, okay, easy, whatever. This won't even move my balance. And then I went to the cologne section, and then I was asking the lady to show me this cologne, and I also asked her to pull out this pair of glasses that I tried on. I loved both. And she was very sweet.
B
She did.
A
She was very sweet.
B
Nice old lady.
A
Nice old lady. Very sweet. Offered by me.
B
A clone. Well, you know they get commissions.
A
I know.
B
And they're there to fucking. Yeah, exactly. They're vultures.
A
Yep. And she vultured me. She's. I don't regret it. I hope she got a very nice meal out of what I bought.
B
She did. You're paying for her life, for you to get and not move to Dallas. Well done.
A
Yes, yes, yes. And in my head it was, well, I'm gonna do this thing today and I'm probably gonna have my eyes opened and I'll. I'll just get back to Michigan. Work only put money into things that matter. Like my credit cards, make sure my payments are on time.
B
But that's what it's always gonna be, isn't it? It's always, I will do this later.
A
This. It always feels different, though, if that makes sense.
B
So what felt different now that I.
A
Flew all the way across the country to be on this show for the help? Because you guys don't allow me to plug anything. This isn't gonna benefit me. People are gonna.
B
Why the f. Are you here? Because it's Supposed to be benefiting you in a way of fixing your finances.
A
That's the way I was gonna say. It benefits me in that way. It doesn't benefit me in my career path at all, which is social media. It does nothing for me. But this is gonna hopefully help me open my eyes a little bit because I wouldn't have flown here, you know, if I didn't see a benefit for it at all.
B
I mean there's going to be some guys in the audience. We, we, you know, we, we, we, we, we, we love all, we love, we love all the funds. I'm sure we got some furries. I'm sure, you know, I, we, you know we got, we got the gays, you know, we got them all going to. They will find your online somehow.
A
It's on Google.
B
It's on Google. On Google is on Google.
A
My side of my ex is on Google.
B
On Google. On Google how on Google? What do you mean on Google?
A
Safe search. You type in a certain phrase and you just press images. It's all over the place. We had a very successful.
B
Dare I ask what's the phrase?
A
That's not. We'll bleep it. You could type in only leaks or you can type in only leaks and it'll pop up. Furry guy on something something and then you can type in only F and they all pop up.
B
Originally I did I'm a gooner and half those words didn't make sense to me.
A
I don't goon, I don't watch. I don't do any of that. This is just stuff that I've known from the hit. Like that might hit my history.
B
Okay, listen, you're not a credit card person guy. I think the best thing you could do for your future when you actually come into this money again, which I hope you do. That's not just how the world works. I think you've been in the right place, right time. That doesn't mean that's going to infinitely happen forever. Forever. But either way just close your accounts. Yeah, you'll your credit for a bit of credit. Sorry. Anyways, I don't really care. Open the fizz card. It's a debit card that builds credit. But at least you can't overspend. What's in your checking account? I just. You cannot use credit cards. You can't be trusted with them. You go into Neiman Marcus. If you didn't have the thousand dollars in your checking account, you wouldn't have spent it, but you had the, the ability. Now maxing out Your credit card probably pretty darn close.
A
No, I still have a thousand dollars left on it.
B
No, not a full like 700 or so, but either way because you had the ability to go spend it on a credit card. You did.
A
You should have seen the way my eyes lit up when they called me from Chase and said, hey, we just gave you $11,000 limit. Called my dad. Dad, they just gave me this great credit card. Yeah, I was still at the dealership. This was just entirely without the only or anything. And I got this $11,000 limit from the freedom with 18 months, no interest. And I was very behaved on it for the first few months I had it.
B
Yes, you're a good boy.
A
We all know I was a good boy. As my tail starts to wag.
B
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A
And then I kind of fell off the boat when the breakup happened because I was withheld funds that I needed and by her. By her.
B
Did she owe it legally? Contractually.
A
Legally. We had no paperwork. We had a verbal agreement to do paperwork. Yeah, it was the. Her dad was the only reason that I ended up getting some money. And that was because I had to sell her my previous fur suit for $5,000. And then that $5,000 was okay.
B
Your collection? How much?
A
This is my only one. Now I've probably spent at least 12 grand on my fur collections in the last three years.
B
How much does the whole. How would you sell that for 75 right now?
A
I would just post it and people.
B
Would get it for 75.
A
They would bid for it, and it'd probably go a little over seven because of all the art, the reputation that comes with it.
B
But you've. You've fallen off for a while.
A
I'm. No, I'm on right now in the furry community. I know you say, oh, it's only 35k. That's like.
B
Yeah. But you bragged about the almost million and that fell off.
A
That was because of my cat. I was not the main focal figure of that social.
B
Your cat got a. It's so easy to get followers on TikTok.
A
So the hairless cat named Lola. I used to yell at her, oh, rotisserie chicken. And then those videos just pop the hell off from like 2017, 2019.
B
Okay. Yeah. I mean, you have seen skills. For what it's worth.
A
I used to work for rappers. Like, I, I have. I'm not going to lie. I have fallen off in terms of where I was in life. I used to be Baby no Money's marketing director. I was working with Young Gravy. I went backstage for po.
B
Both of them. Did they connect you with the show?
A
I, I. So no.
B
They like the show.
A
I had no idea. They text.
B
They've. They've both texted asking if we want to have them on. Just both. Their finances are great, so I'll hold.
A
My opinions on both of them.
B
I like that.
A
Watch this. Alex is a piece of.
B
Which one's that?
A
Baby no Money.
B
Why?
A
He never paid me. Not a dime. Worked for him for about three years. He promised me as soon as he would make it, he would give me money. I made him memes. I ran his platforms for him. I helped him with meme marketing.
B
Was it contracted?
A
Nope. I was young. He first got in contact with me when I was 17, 16, actually, and used my skills for years. And then when La La La dropped, June of 2019. 2020, he just completely cut me off and hired the buddy that I introduced him to full time.
B
To be clear, your skill starting bb, Baby no money. Baby no money drama right now.
A
I've. Oh, I've already have. I have a video on my platform calling him out with over 150,000 views.
B
You are on a much larger platform. I am saying this might start.
A
That's okay. Alexander Gavuchin. F you sue me. See what you get out of it.
B
I will say, baby no money. I like your music. I don't know you. I appreciated the few texts we've had back and forth.
A
Yeah. I'm sure he asked you to use this music on one of your videos. And I plan to pay you.
B
No.
A
That's surprising.
B
No, no. He's been on a nice coffee hour.
A
Okay.
B
Graham and Jack, my pals. So. And you know, we talked about. He.
A
He.
B
We were this close to filming Financial audit. Then he had to film out the next day. Young gravy.
A
I will say I can't say anything bad about Matt.
B
Okay, good. Because he performed at my university. He also planned coming on.
A
Gravy's good. We lost contact. We never had any obligations with each other. I did a lot, like some stuff for him. Nothing professionally. He brought me backstage like three times. Great guy. I love Matthew. Alex, on the other hand, not so much.
B
Ladies and gentlemen, you know where you love her. Financial audits. Lesbian correspondent. I need a. What do we call it? Financial audit. Lesbian score, please. 0 to 10. 0 being the lowest. 10 being the highest. On you. Okay.
A
I know I have a haircut of a mask woman.
B
Yeah.
A
Mask lesbian. Okay. And that you sucked a couple. Okay, well, I will. Oh, I've had two DS in my mouth.
B
This is more like a gay quiz.
A
I've been inside two men, but, you know.
B
You've been inside two men, but it's a lesbian, but I am straight.
A
I've had to figure it out.
B
You've been inside two men, but you're straight?
A
Yes. I didn't enjoy it. It was honestly the worst thing ever.
B
So were you hard?
A
Not really.
B
Take me through that. Because you went inside one man and you were like, ah, give it one more try.
A
Well, yeah, I was like, oh, you know, just because the first bites. Not that good. Doesn't mean the second bike can't be better.
B
Yeah. So, okay, what kind of car do you drive?
A
Alexis V8LS 460.
B
Do you like going to hardware stores?
A
No.
B
Oh. Do you have any tattoos? Yeah. Okay.
A
Like seven.
B
I'm trying to think. Have you watched Carol?
A
Oh, oh. The. The Netflix Animated series.
B
Nope.
A
Nope, nope.
B
Yeah, no, she's not a lesbian. What's the score?
A
It's really not the Animated Series, Carol.
B
Two out of ten. Two out of ten. Ladies and gentlemen, if you want your Hammer lesbian score, your Hammer lesbian score, go to caleb.hammer.com. forward slash, lesbian.
A
I wish I would have scored higher on that.
B
And how much does Baby. No money. Oh, yeah.
A
The thing is, there is no way for me to give a number of how much he owes Me, because we never had a contract.
B
The range that you thought you would be. Ow.
A
With what my service was and what we accomplished together over those few years, I would say at least in the range of a few thousand dollars, you know, traveling to these events for him and to actually. Cause the real reason he put me backstage for a few of these events is because I had such a large TikTok platform. He wanted me to promote backstage content.
B
I. Yeah, he collaborates with creators all the time.
A
Yes. But this was on top of what I was doing for him with the meme page marketing. I was actually putting him in contact with all these very successful meme pages that he had no contact with at the time because he was a nobody. This was during. This was before the recess album dropped.
B
I like his music, but I honestly do not know this music.
A
He was only getting a few thousand streams a month. He was beginning, and I saw the potential in him and I taught him the method he uses to this day, which he was supposed to stop when he got the money for it. But the method I taught him was just leech, you know, reach out to these dm, dm, these meme page people with large audiences and say, hey, I'd really like for you to use my music in a video. I have no intention.
B
That's what, like, everyone does.
A
Well, he would tell them that eventually he would pay them. Well, I'm not the only case. There's people posting about him now as well, these streamers that are talking about his failure to deliver on his promises. And as soon as you ask him.
B
For any money, big drama right now. Not gonna lie. This is. This will probably be online. Well, this will be online, but this will probably be.
A
I'm just. I'm hurt. I'm not gonna lie, because we had a really good connection.
B
So put a number to it.
A
20K. 20k for the success he garnered.
B
Two thirds of your debt.
A
That would pay off almost everything. It would change my life. And it's nothing to Alex. And I know he might sit here and say. And try to deny.
B
You don't know his finances.
A
I know it's very good.
B
Oh, I'm sure he does.
A
Well, it's very good. I know that he had made.
B
How good? How well I know.
A
La la la alone, in the first year of it being out made him a little over 1.5 million.
B
Okay, but after taxes.
A
But that's just the first year of it being out. And that's one of his songs. He's got many songs that are almost on the Same level of success as La La La.
B
What's La La La?
A
When I popped off and your girl gay.
B
Be that one.
A
The one everybody knows. Oh.
B
Oh, I like that one.
A
I had it before it came out. I was one of the people he trusted with that song.
B
Is Bibi no Money. Who you stuck it in?
A
No, no. And I will say the funniest thing. The first message he ever sent me was, what the. You're 16? Because he didn't know. And it wasn't. I'm not saying anything bad about that. I'm just saying he was unaware that I was as young as I was because of what I knew and what I had accomplished at the time.
B
Okay.
A
And Matt put me in contact with him.
B
Gravy Matt.
A
Oh, yeah. We became Facebook friends, me and Baby no Money.
B
Wow.
A
Yeah. And we had a very close connection for about three years. No, I don't. I don't know how to poke. I never poked anyone on Facebook. I thought that was a MySpace thing. Sorry. I'm 23.
B
Anything else you want to say on that? Because this is all going out there, so this is the time before we move on.
A
I'm willing to have a conversation with him, with him, if he would actually get back to me, but I know he's seen my videos talking about him.
B
He's blocking you.
A
That's okay.
B
No. Is he blocking you?
A
No, I'm not blocked. I've seen him.
B
Have you texted him?
A
I've mentioned him on my story directly, calling him out a few times, and I think there might be a.
B
You haven't tried to contact him?
A
I have tried to contact him. I emailed him before asking him to reach out to me. Nothing. I reached out on other social media platforms. Nothing. And then I made the. And then I resorted to the videos, which one on TikTok got like 100,000 views and one on Instagram got like 150,000 views directly. Calling him out for what? I have just told you with proof, with evidence, you know, with our. With our messages, with me backstage with him. I wish I had more, but, you know, being in the relationship, I was. She went through my camera roll and deleted everything from before 2021. Because it wasn't. You know, she didn't know me at the time, so she's like, you have no reason to remember any of this.
B
Maybe we'll look at those messages and posts in the post show. I need to get. I want to get back to the finances. Less of the drama. $10,627.90 with a minimum monthly payment of 357 on your chase Freedom card. How long does this take to pay off? If you make your minimum payments only, which is all you do and don't purchase with which you purchase.
A
I think it's like 24 years.
B
22 years.
A
22 years.
B
That's insanity.
A
I'm aware. Most people can't say that. They'll just be like I don't know how long.
B
Yeah, you're aware, which almost I would argue it's potentially worse because it's not ignorance, it's actively choosing to yourself over. And you're saying you're marrying this girl, you're gonna her life over. Okay. And she's not the breadwinner. She does okay, but she's not the breadwinner.
A
I think it's a. It's a thing of self destruction. I've always kind of pursued that. Not in like a suicidal way, just like. It just feels good to struggle for some reason in relationships, in friendships, in career. Career choices.
B
What are you talking about? What kind of cope is this? I don't know what feels good. You like getting choked down?
A
Yes.
B
Hey, yo, what the fuck? Okay, so you're sub masochist. You like being sub in life?
A
Yeah, I like to get by life. So you're about to make a trade based on a friend's text, but which you do you listen to, is it, we could buy a house in Tulum, get optioning those options, we could lose everything. Or let's do a little research, get your head in the trade and make the investment decision that's right for you. Learn more@finra.org TradeSmart Life is choking me out every day. It feels great because it feels like I'm suffocating with the debts I have.
B
Great. You like it. Why would you want to change it then?
A
That's because I don't actually like it. Externally, I like it.
B
This makes no sense.
A
Exactly. This is inside my mind.
B
Makes no sense to me then makes.
A
No sense to me either. This is something I've struggled with for a long time. That I'm just like, why am I the way I am? I've talked to psychiatrists, I've been to therapy. Only thing they've said is just, oh, take this medication. And I don't want to do that. Why would I want to do that? And I'm already on albuterol for the rest of my life. Blood pressure medication for the rest of my life. Adderall.
B
What? Why blood pressure?
A
So my debt originally started because of my Heart problems. I had potentially pulmonary hypertension, which is high blood pressure within the lungs. And I was in and out of ers hospitals. I was having heart palpitations. I thought I was going to stroke out at a very young age because I was. I was struggling with substance usage at the time, but no longer anymore. And now.
B
Oh, well, that's why.
A
Yeah.
B
What was your substance?
A
I didn't know at the time what they were pressed with, but it was F press X. Yeah. And I was taking that long time throughout 20, 19, 2018. 2020.
B
You were young.
A
The pandemic. Yeah.
B
Yeah.
A
And when you have that plus a surplus of income coming. Oh, I didn't even mention the meme page money. I was making like 3 to 500 a day from promotions when I was a meme page called.
B
Why'd you stop that?
A
Then I got banned, which is why I learned how to get people unbanned.
B
Yeah, that would do it. It's Taco Bell. Sonic. Chick Fil A. Chick Fil A. You're a bad gay planet. Fitness is okay. And then Dunkin Donuts. And you've had a late fee this year so far, so I don't want to hear what you said earlier. What do you. Late fee on what? This card. Chase Freedom.
A
That's new to me. You're teaching me something.
B
Exactly. And that's why I always make sure you extra confirm at the beginning that you haven't had a late fee. That's because that's always in these conversations.
A
That's surprising.
B
Yeah. I don't know what month it was, but it's been this year.
A
Okay, that's very surprising.
B
Why?
A
Because I do. I know as irresponsible as I look and I act and I am, I do make sure that I make my payments. I pick up shifts. If I think I'm gonna be even remotely close to being short, I can work seven. I've worked 14 days straight just to ensure that I've got everything I need. And I have a little bit left over as well, you know, because I do care about my credit history. I know that it's right now, but I know that there's something to be saved if I take care of my payments right now and then I actually pay it down over the next couple years.
B
So there's 28.24% interest rate. You're just spending so much money on bull here.
A
I know. And the food is explainable. It's because I like to feed my girlfriend. It's not her fault.
B
Can't cook.
A
I Do cook. I just don't cook enough.
B
Well cook more. Meal prep especially is the budget friendly cookbook. Like what are we trying to do? Right?
A
Yeah.
B
And you feeding her is going and getting Dunkin. Yeah. Taco Bell, Sonic, Chick Fil A. Chick Fil A. Other than Chick Fil A. The rest of it is honestly just kind of.
A
It is. There's not a lot of options in the Michigan.
B
That's all. I'm from Michigan. It's a literal lie. I'm a smaller town. You're in a. Still a major city.
A
I'm not that close to. You're in deep suburb in the suburbs with it. Hey yo, Terry. Going on.
B
Hey, how's it going?
A
Yeah, and we have like checkers. We got Coney Islands which are all.
B
I know where you work. That's good food.
A
Well, yeah, you'll see a bunch of those on there.
B
Idiot. That's the one thing you didn't want to talk about? Unless you're okay with it being there.
A
I'd rather not because people already call. Yeah, people already call where I work.
B
Stop it. Oh, well. Well, they probably will again if they.
A
I don't care. My management already knows. So it's. Well, that's the thing about restaurants. They hire everybody they hire. Like yeah, you gotta have a major criminal history.
B
Who do you think's in the back? They're degenerate.
A
Not. Not where I work, but in the past where I've worked, the. The dishwashers were convicted sex offenders they hired.
B
This episode is brought to you by State Farm. Listening to this podcast. Smart move being financially savvy.
A
Smart move.
B
Another smart move having State Farm help.
A
You create a competitive price when you.
B
Choose to bundle home and auto bundling. Just another way to save with a personal price plan like a good neighbor. State Farm is there. Prices are based on rating plans that vary by state. State coverage options are selected by the customer availability, amount of discounts and savings.
A
And eligibility vary by state. Everybody in the restaurants. Oh, where I work now, my co workers are great. I love them. Hi guys.
B
Oh, okay, you're making me do this right now.
A
What was that?
B
A tum.
A
I know it wasn't a mint. That's not a bad breath dig either. That's just. I know.
B
Why are you so parasocial? How do you know I hate men?
A
Oh, gee, I don't know. I have no idea. Just a thought, I guess.
B
You don't want to me, do you?
A
No, I don't think I do. I couldn't take the hammer. It's Exit only. Like I said, you don't strike me as a bottom.
B
I wouldn't be.
A
May you put this on?
B
Maybe, but I don't think so. Again, to clarify into women. It doesn't matter. But listen here, big guy. Instead of the Dunkin Donut, you know, it's a little interesting about this because we're in the drama thing here. This is your little gamer subs. You can give her this. This is your free sample. You guys can get free samples below the link below. But the reason I'm giving you this. Well, you know, why is Schmitty behind that? This is Charlie.
A
Charlie. P.B.
B
No. Money's friend.
A
Oh, moist, critical. Yeah, yeah, I know. They love each other.
B
I'm a piece of really close with.
A
People that actually benefit him. So that makes sense.
B
Well, dude, business. Come on.
A
If Charlie got banned tomorrow, you wouldn't be friends with him.
B
Here you go. Give her this instead of Dunkin'. That's 25 cents a serving. Instead of stopping and getting your $4 energy drink link below. Best drinks, you get the shaker. This is what I'm doing. I have mine.
A
I will use this.
B
Yes, you will. It's good.
A
I also have a.
B
And you can also get free samples to test them out first.
A
I don't have to have Duncan. I've got a Keurig. I just.
B
You know, honestly, Keurig's probably better than Duncan. Duncan's not that good.
A
No.
B
Okay. Such a distracting conversation. What is this? What am I looking at? Is this a firm?
A
Is that my affirm. Yes.
B
Right.
A
That is.
B
What's going on with this?
A
Primarily Walmart, I'm pretty sure Amazon. Amazon.
B
Walmart.
A
Yeah, Amazon.
B
What's the 126053 from Amazon?
A
That was recent.
B
Yeah, it is. What is it?
A
I needed to furnish my place. I didn't want to have a bare bones house.
B
But you can. Do you guys live together?
A
Yeah.
B
But you can.
A
Yeah, well, I wanted a furnished place, you know, for content purposes.
B
For content? You're moving out? You're leaving. You're trying to get to Dallas? Yes, so why. And then the Amazon 597 more stuff.
A
For the apartment house. Sorry.
B
And the Walmart 205.
A
That was our TV that I first got when I moved to Michigan. And a pair of Skull Crusher headphones.
B
Here you are. Emo freak, aren't you?
A
No, I. Looks like bass is Skull Crusher emo. Is that what I'm hearing right now?
B
Oh, that's very emo guy. You serious? You serious?
A
I mean, I wouldn't even consider myself emo. So this is.
B
Look at you.
A
I like dark aesthetics and my Chemical Romance.
B
I mean, come on, let's be. You sat at the freak table in high school.
A
Actually, I was extremely popular in high school.
B
Yeah, but I was sat at the freak.
A
I was most likely to be a celebrity. And I was class president junior and sophomore.
B
No, I'm not saying you weren't popular, but you probably sat at the freak table because look at you.
A
Well, I made the freaks. I got people out of their shelves, you know, out of their.
B
Okay, yo. $2,063.41. What's your minimum you're owing on a firm?
A
The big one, the 1200. Just all of it in total, I think 220. 2 40amonth.
B
240. Pull up your Amazon for me right now.
A
It is up on my recent orders.
B
And start a screen recording. Will blackout Private.
A
You want it?
B
Give selfie stick so he can record himself getting pegged. We love it. There's a video card. Professional carpet cleaner. Because he pisses everywhere like a bad boy. That was for this sectional led. What content are you even doing right now? The smart lights. Smart lights. Foam mattress, blankets, pots. Some of this isn't the worst. We don't need the lights, cuz there's lights. There's lights. You don't need the side tables right now. You don't. Yeah. The TV stand. That's okay. Comforter. That's okay. Bed sheets. That's okay. You didn't need a high pressure handle for your shower. Didn't need. You didn't need the mirror. So some of it's good, some of it's bad.
A
The mirror was a necessity. How am I supposed to take shirtless furry pictures without a mirror?
B
So we're still doing that?
A
Well, the thing is. So I don't.
B
What are we trying to do?
A
I'm not nude in my own. I'm not naked.
B
Yeah, but you're also not making much money.
A
No, like I think I do. Like 250amonth from the only right now I've got like 36 people on there. I don't promote it.
B
Our subscriptions, Cap, Cut, Gmail, iCloud, Plus, Insta360 Instagram and pics. Art.
A
Yes, all those. I can't get rid of any of those.
B
Wonderful. No, it pays for it with the social media stuff you do. This is not great, but it's fine. I just wish the social media brought in more money. I don't necessarily like online unless you really, really really want to do it. I just don't like when people fall into it because they feel like they need to do it.
A
That's kind of where I'm at right now.
B
What need or want?
A
Need.
B
See, I don't like it. I don't want you to do it then.
A
Well, I don't want to do it.
B
Necessarily either and I really don't want you to do it. Well here's the thing.
A
This is my just where I work it is extremely labor intensive and missing one day is me losing 300 bucks or 200 sometimes whatever. The only to me is a substitute to being able to take a day off because if I lose $300 for a day off I get it rebacked.
B
From the only is that worth it to you?
A
For my physical health and my mental health a little bit. I'm hoping if I decide I'm gonna stick with it that it can make a little bit more. But I'm really on the borderline of just quitting it altogether. It's not something that makes me happy.
B
Good, then quit.
A
But it's something I do feel a little drawn to for financial assistance.
B
Oh, for financial Then quit. I quit. Okay. What's can qualify? Yeah, qualify.
A
So that was going to be our coffee table and side tables for the.
B
Living room furniture and a dresser for my stupid room. Really? Your furniture right now is a lot of your debt that's preventing you from going to Dallas. The furniture for Detroit is literally preventing you from moving to Dallas.
A
Yeah.
B
Now stupid. That is very stupid. And also why Dallas? I just don't get it out of all the Texas cities.
A
Well it's not going to be Dallas. Well it's like when you live in Frisco you're going to tell someone from Michigan you're going to live in deep suburbia.
B
Even worse, you're going to kill.
A
No, I don't want to live in Frisco. I'm talking about like I'd probably be.
B
No, but if not in Dallas you're going to be in a deep suburb.
A
Yeah, I like suburbs. 20 minute travel to Dallas where all the money is 25 there's dealerships all over Grapevine.
B
Oh for dealership life. Yeah. If you want to live in a car infrastructure place where it's depressing to go outside then yeah, that's a good place for car dealerships.
A
There's just a lot of move movement is what I'm looking for. I'm for the ability to movements on highways. Yeah. My city traffic but career path that.
B
I'm most focused on, ah, that kind of movement. $878.34. What's your minimum payment? Oh, it's 2143.
A
Yes.
B
Is there interest on this?
A
If I don't pay it within 90 days, yes.
B
90 days from when? From now. From when?
A
From month and a half. Two months ago we just moved in. We only paid rent and a half.
B
Two months ago would.
A
That's a month and a half.
B
What are we. So a month and a half from.
A
Now, we're halfway through that 90 day period. Yes.
B
Oh, is it back interest?
A
It's bad interest. If I let it go, is it back? I don't know.
B
Is it accruing already and then it hits.
A
No, it doesn't accrue until 90 days and then it's the total of what I have left over.
B
Total? You have leftover starts accruing interest? Yes.
A
And it's like 100%. Some crazy number like progressive leasing. You know, it's predatory if you can't pay it off in 90 days.
B
Okay, we got to prioritize that. All right, listen here. Financial audit. I've curated the exact resources and tools I personally use or would use if I was in certain situations. So take advantage of these offers in the resources section in the description below. The first one, I've moved my investments to webull. Do the same and transfer to my investing app of choice and you get cash bonuses of $200 all the way up to $30,000 depending on initial funding amounts and up to 8.1% APY on your money and up to 3.5 matches for your IRA. And then number two, a great new checking account that I've switched over from Sofi and it's called chime. Get that $550 bonus when you sign up with direct deposit and get almost 4% on your money just sitting there. And then three, automate your investing with acorns. Usually sign up incentives are only 5 bucks, but you get $20 with my link. Number four, you can increase your income and boost your resume with a course career certification. Five, if T mobile is good in your area, switch to Helium. Get a literal zero dollar a month for the same exact service. But most importantly, go get your free Hammer Financial score and see where you stand in the world of finances. Take the assessment@caleb hammer.com you will not regret any of these. Change your life today. Quicksilver1. I mean, we're back over $1,000 again. What's up with this?
A
That one's been maxed out for like two years.
B
Why?
A
I don't know exactly.
B
Because you spend well.
A
When I was released into the public, into freedom, when I got apart from my relationship, when I was back in real life because I wasn't allowed to go out. I wasn't allowed to have a social life. When I got back into the world, I didn't have a job. I was using my credit cards to stay afloat. Quicksilver being one of them. But I think the quicksilver was already mostly maxed out when I first came into freedom. I think the. The freedom card kind of saved my.
B
This is insane. This takes eight years to pay off just this alone. With a $39 minimum payment, $25.88 of interest is accruing. You have to be spending money on here, or else this would get lower at some point. If it's been maxed out for years. You are spending money. There's no other alternative.
A
I'm spending money. I'm spending money that I don't need to be. I mean, I just got this two weeks ago, this hoodie. Oh. Didn't finance this. I bought this cash. This is.
B
Why don't you spend going out to eat last month.
A
Month, probably 800 bucks.
B
It was 800. Dude, you're so. This is what pisses me off more than anything. You're eligible.
A
I know my.
B
This makes no sense the way you're living life. You have a goal, but you're doing it feels like anything and everything to not go to the goal.
A
I feel like I keep moving the goal post.
B
Sure. We'll get to that spending here soon. 30% interest rate on this. Okay. Capital One Platinum.
A
That was my first credit card.
B
Oh, wonderful. What's going on with it? You're spending. I'll tell you that you're spending on a card that is maxed out, that is accruing interest that you are not able to pay off on a monthly basis. Why the Possibly why?
A
So when I use that card or any. Actually, really any of my credit cards, I typically have enough in my checkings account to buy it outright. But then I think, well, why drop myself low when I can just swipe my credit card right now and still have 900 for any emergency things that might pop up.
B
You're losing so much, though. This takes three years to pay off if you don't even purchase. Dude, if you don't even purchase and it's just raising canes, it's nothing that's even necessary if it was an emergency. Something like. You're talking about, like that shouldn't be being taken away from your checking account anyway. Okay. It shouldn't be because you're trying to get to your goal. And you don't get to your goal by spending 35, 50 on raising canes. $800 on a month, going out to eat. You make a good income. We can pay off this debt in a reasonable amount of time. You're set up for success, but you refuse. You refuse in every way possible to get to that success.
A
Well, I've got financial anxiety like a child. Well, yeah, it's. It's like financial anxiety. Like, so, like, here's the.
B
Wouldn't be the best way to get from. Avoidance is usually what happens in anxiety. So you'd be avoiding spending money that is preventing you from having financial security if you're anxious about it.
A
Well, I would rather see liquid in my checkings account than see my balance go down. For some reason I'm trying to like.
B
No, it doesn't matter anyway. You wouldn't have been spending raising canes or 800 of fast food on your check in either. So that is not a valid excuse because that wouldn't have been spent regardless of where.
A
Well, it's the small payments like raising canes. Probably 30 bucks. If I have a thousand bucks in.
B
My checking, thousand at Neiman Marcus yesterday, that wouldn't have been checking accounts.
A
That was stupid. But the canes, I think of it as, okay, it's 30 bucks right now, but then I do it again the next day. Oh, it's only 20 bucks. And then I do it the day after.
B
You know this? You know this. You're saying this right now. You know this. Yeah, you know it.
A
It's a cycle, a vicious cycle that I am struggling to get out of. Does it help that I've never had financial assistance my whole life? And I've been independent since I was you?
B
I never had, well, financial assistance. In what way? Education or just money. You've been. You made $20,000 before we've. Before I even could even conceive of that kind of money in terms of age.
A
I don't want to hear help. I've never, like, my parents have never given, like, just advice like saving. No one does.
B
No one does.
A
I feel like that's not true. I feel like a lot of people have families that show.
B
There's almost no one I know that got financial advice. My financial advice was open up a credit card and max it out at 18 to get a piano I wanted. What the are we talking about, buddy? That is just Such a cope for you, excusing you being a dumb raising kids every day.
A
Because my friends have had financial help. They've had their parents walk them through opening a 401k.
B
They have great parents.
A
Still.
B
This doesn't excuse you going to a thousand dollars. Even Marcus yesterday.
A
No, that was stupid.
B
Yes.
A
Don't regret it. I will, but not right now. I don't regret it right now. I will regret it, but not right now. My buyers remorse.
B
Because if you don't regret it right now, then you're gonna go do it tomorrow again, just like you did with Raising Kings yesterday. Then today I won't. Yes, you would. If you do not have remorse, why wouldn't you?
A
My buyer's remorse takes a little bit to kick in. Longer than most people.
B
But if you don't regret it, then why would you not purchase tomorrow again?
A
Well, because yesterday was like, you know, going out with a bang. It's like, if you're gonna have a last party ever, a last hurrah, might as well do it right. And that was my kind of justification.
B
Because that never works. That never works. That's what people do with their diets. That's what people do with their drugs. That's what people do with their drinking. That never works. You're just continuing to fuel that dopamine release that you are getting. And apparently you're out there just spending like 40 bucks on vapes constantly and then giving them to co workers.
A
Yes.
B
As well. Underage.
A
No, no, no, no.
B
Why?
A
Because I don't make money. I don't like to own one.
B
You don't have money.
A
I'll get one for like a night if I know I'll be with friends or if I'm gonna have a drink. And then the next day I go to work, I'll be hitting it. I'm like, I don't want to own this, because then I'm hit it when I'm at a house and all that. And I'll just give it to someone who wants it and I'll put it up whoever grabs it first.
B
Oh, your generation sucks with their addiction to vaping. It's insane.
A
I don't have one.
B
I thought we were over the nicotine addiction. Like, we. We were on that downslide. And then you guys just went, well.
A
I've got no nicotine on me now. I can go on it without it. And then I just pick it up for a couple days, and there you go.
B
I mean, that is still that. It is money. Okay? I don't even know what this is. This doesn't even have a brand on it other than the W. What is this?
A
Oh, Westlake Financial. That's my car payment.
B
Okay. Alexis, this is your car?
A
Yeah.
B
Okay. Okay. Very good car. This doesn't make sense. You have $9,764.57 to pay. You said you had a $15,000 car, but put 10 down.
A
I got a 10% interest rate and a $3,500 warranty.
B
No, that still math doesn't add up because your interest rate wouldn't make your balance go up. Your minimum to payment will always be enough to make it go down a little bit.
A
Maybe it was 16. Would that make sense if it was 16?
B
17, maybe.
A
I know, because it was.
B
Unless you looped in taxes and everything too. Probably. Probably. Good. What do you think it's worth?
A
I'm in positive equity. I know that. I know that I could trade in value at least 11.
B
Yeah, it's right around there. 11 to 13. 13 private. 11 for trade in. So barely positive, but in a way that kind of works. What I don't like is the 10% interest on this because it's just like you're not slow.
A
At the time, that was very low. I was a salesperson.
B
Very low. What?
A
As a used car salesperson, a 9 point whatever percent interest rate was very low for a 2012, which is why I jumped on it. Especially with being a first time buyer.
B
You wouldn't get it. Also, I see people get low rates all the time on this show with worse finances. So I don't know what you're talking about. I don't know.
A
I was seeing 15, 20, 25.
B
Everywhere else people are getting subprime is like above in that 20. That's subprime borrowers.
A
Well, prime used to be 6%. Yes. And so at 9% on a 2012 used with almost six figures mileage, it was a little over nine. It's like nine and a half. 9.6%.
B
You're not beating the market. If this money was just in the.
A
Market though, it made sense to me at the time as a first time buyer putting as much as I was putting down low payments and a low term.
B
I'm happy you have an equity position. I do have an equity position, but it's just the, the rate I really don't like. Why haven't you tried to refinance them?
A
My credit's. They're gonna look the whole time. Not. No, it wasn't up until about six months after I bought the car because I Had bought the Lexus. Breakup happened like a month later. And then everything went to maxed out the Freedom card within a span of two months.
B
And you have to get new tires right now.
A
I do need new tires.
B
Yeah.
A
Beg time.
B
What's that going to cost?
A
650? 700.
B
How are you paying for that in your mind? Credit card.
A
Well, okay. I was approved.
B
We're afraid to take it from our check.
A
I was approved for a finance line for it, but I'm not going to do it.
B
So what are we going to do?
A
No.
B
Constantly.
A
No, no, I'm not going to. I'm going to make sure I have the money for it. You know, it means picking up a few shifts to have a little bit of spending on it.
B
Dude, you should pick up every shift in the world to pay off all this debt and budget it out and then you can move to Dallas.
A
I would love to, but I walk at least six miles a shift. I get beat the off after a week of work.
B
But you're 23. Yeah. This is time to do it. Yeah.
A
I'm young and I'm young and bold, but still a lot on the body.
B
You can, dude, you can do it. I don't want to hear it. Come on, you can do it.
A
I'm happy to hear my equity position is a positive for you.
B
It's the first positive all day other than your status. Right.
A
And the status. What status?
B
Is that all your debt?
A
I don't think so. No.
B
What else is there?
A
We're missing the 11. Did we talk about the almost $11,000 credit card?
B
What?
A
The Chase Freedom?
B
Yeah, yeah. That was the second one. Is there another one?
A
No. No. Okay, so we got to the quicksilver.
B
Well, there's the apartment debt.
A
Yeah.
B
So what is that? 9,095. And that was 500. Okay, that was insane.
A
Eviction fees. Late.
B
Oh, there's a Best Buy.
A
Oh yeah, the Best Buy credit card. That's a.
B
Pull that up.
A
I can't. I don't know how to. I've never.
B
What do you owe on it?
A
16, 15, 1600, something like that. I bought my girlfriend an iPad so she could pursue. Your girlfriend?
B
Is that even you?
A
Yes. Not even me. I bought her an iPad so she could pursue a drawing career and I. Apple pencil. She makes money from it. She makes like an extra couple hundred dollars a week from it. I got a Ninja smoothie and whatever bowl maker and then I got an air fryer and then I got some microphones that I needed. I use all the time. I think that's it. Almost bought the 360 camera on it.
B
But that ended up $1,600. What's your minimum monthly payment?
A
I don't know. I called them and just set it up and told them to put the auto pay on. I don't know. I've never accessed that account.
B
I guess it's like 50 bucks. Yeah, but you say you're making your minimum payments forever, and we know you had a late payment this year so far on one of these that we.
A
Already looked at, which is a shock to me. I didn't know that.
B
Yeah, but that means. I don't even think you might know if you're even paying the Best Buy one. I am.
A
I know that.
B
What?
A
I am.
B
How do you know?
A
Because I haven't gotten any angry emails from them like I did the first time. Because the first time I. I used it, I didn't set up the auto pay. I just kind of assumed that it would already do that for me. And it. It missed a month. Then I knocked it out, paid it down to zero, and then I let it rack back up again.
B
Oh, you got medical collections, too?
A
Yes, from all the heart stuff.
B
Oh, when was that?
A
Oh, that started in 2018 and then went until about late 2022. It wasn't up until recently that I was reassured. Oh, I don't believe it is owing because I'm not giving them anything, but I think it's in the $30,000 range.
B
You do owe it.
A
It'll your credit probably 30, 40.
B
I'll say $35,000 now. Listen, I get it, and that sucks. You can usually get on a payment plan at the hospital. I would rather do that. This sucks, okay, that you have that. I'm glad you're alive. You're willing to your entire credit for a long time.
A
Well, it hasn't affected my credit yet. My deductions are not from my medical debt.
B
It's not on your credit?
A
No.
B
It might be soon. A court decided that it can be now.
A
It's been years.
B
I know, but a court's decided it can be now, so it might.
A
If it hits me, it hits me. I'll figure it out. But it's something that I had no choice then.
B
You're right. I also don't care about.
A
I had no choice.
B
I know you didn't have a choice. I'm not saying like, Ru. Ru, I'm glad you have this. I'm just talking about the impact on your life.
A
Well, the thing is, it ended up being a misdiagnosis. So all this money I ended up spending on everything was totally for nothing. I waited over two years, almost two.
B
Years for the right insurance.
A
I had none. I needed to get a cardiac MRI and up front that was $9,500. I couldn't afford it. Well, I could ask. Didn't want to.
B
Yeah, I was going to say one a month. Either you can afford it or two, it'll be completely subsidized and you'll get essentially free health insurance through the Affordable Care Act.
A
I do in Michigan. I get free. I get free health care.
B
There you go. You right now you make money money. Why the would you have free health insurance?
A
They gave me Medicaid.
B
That's disgusting that you should not be subsidized right now. You make good money, but we offer.
A
No health care through where I work. And I'd rather.
B
That doesn't matter. You can afford it. Why should you be subsidized to the taxpayer while you net. Well, you net alone $74,000 a year. Net 100 gross.
A
That does fluctuate though because the, the 500 we gave on average. Okay, yeah, yeah, yeah. I just, I just, I. I have things I want to spend my money on and I feel like I can't when I'm paying for things I like medical debt, like medical insurance. And it never even helped me in the first place when I did have insurance because Texas's insurance plans were so stupid.
B
No, that doesn't make any sense. You just have to get the insurance that aligns with one, your medical needs. Two, the hospitals you go to.
A
Do you know how much I would still pay with. For. With insurance on pay.
B
What insurance do you have? Because your deductibles, it was Blue Cross. Still there's plans within it where your deductibles are higher or lower. Minimum to payments are higher or lower.
A
While paying for my prescriptions every time I went to go pick those up.
B
Exactly. It also depends on your plan.
A
I was still paying for fat chunks of depends on your plan.
B
Yeah.
A
So it didn't make any sense to me. I was like, I'm plan. I don't have health insurance knowledge. It's like one of the worst things I'm at.
B
Yeah, but you literally. It's very descriptive on the website healthcare.gov.
A
It wasn't very descriptive for me. I told everything I needed.
B
When I lost a job once and got very nervous even though I was making money, I went on to healthcare.gov and I signed up for it in an emergency fear way. I didn't end up using it and all this stuff. But I knew exactly what to sign up for. It was so easy. And it took like 10 minutes.
A
I thought I knew. I put everything in. I told them my preexisting medical exam.
B
Don't make me the person defending our healthcare system because our. Our health insurance is insane. But come on, there is a little bit of accountability here.
A
Well, yeah, of lack of knowledge.
B
And then you and that lack of knowledge. You just have to read the description. And two, you should not be subsidized netting 74,000 hours.
A
Well, this was new. I applied for Medicaid when I first moved to Michigan.
B
Unemployment, they allow someone to move into the states.
A
I was in Michigan for less than.
B
A minute and immediately claim, hey, I need money.
A
Yes, I got Medicaid with them.
B
That's kind of insane.
A
Molina Healthcare immediately. As soon as I moved to Michigan, there was no hesitation. They had sent it to me. That like week after.
B
That's really insane that we're just like, hey, please move here and let's support you immediately.
A
I'm blessed. I mean, I know I probably don't deserve it, but, you know, my medication's expensive and when I go to the doctor, you know, for asthma reasons, by.
B
The time your episode's coming out, I'm talking to governor Whitmer in that chair.
A
I'll take advantage of it.
B
Before I'm gonna have to call this out, I'm gonna have to ask her why the are you paying people to do. I guess they want more people to move there. Yeah, maybe that's why.
A
Well, hopefully Michigan's on a come up.
B
I don't.
A
I don't really know anything about their charge.
B
Technically slightly increasing. First time in decades. Okay. No more debt. I don't think. Right?
A
I don't think so.
B
293 in our checking account. Ended or started with 60. That's what we're trying to protect. Yeah, if we don't have any money, I guess. Apple Cash 10 out. Who knows where you went to Texas.
A
This episode is brought to you by Rumchata.
B
A delicious creamy blend of horchata with rum.
A
It's best enjoyed over ice or in your coffee. Delivering vacation vibes any way or anywhere you drink it. Find out more@rumchata.com Drink responsibly. Caribbean ride with real dairy cream. Natural and artificial flavors. Alcohol 13.75% by volume 27.5 proof. Copyright 2025 Agave Loco Brands Pojoae, Wisconsin. All rights reserved.
B
This Roadhouse you cash it's out $25 Wendy's Oil. That's fine. Probably oil change or something. Or maybe gas. Apple Cash sent out chick fil a McDonald's Paris baguette at Apple Cash Party Store. KFC Apple Cash. You send a lot of Apple Cash out for what?
A
Usually when my girlfriend will buy me something or she'll like.
B
No, stop. We can't do that. You just can't do it.
A
Well, she's also in charge of the gas.
B
You went and got some bullshit McDonald's, Starbucks, $5 from the gas station. What are you getting?
A
$5 at the gas station? $5 off the gas?
B
Doubt it. Yeah, really?
A
I can't think of anything else. I don't buy alcohol. I don't buy cigarettes, snacks.
B
There's drinks, there's.
A
Maybe I got a Coke Zero.
B
There it is again. Dude. Gamer subs. Use it 25 cents a serving instead of your stupid 5$. It's just like making coffee at home. If you want your sweet treat that way you shake it up. It's 25 cents. Yeah.
A
Is it caffeine in it?
B
Caffeine free and caffeine depending what you want. I do caffeine free.
A
Okay, okay.
B
Because I do coffee for my caffeine in the morning. Apple Cash, ATM withraw ATM withdraw, McDonald's Cash app. Going in and getting some bull. Chick fil a prime Bob Evans. Haven't heard of that in forever. Who goes to Bob Evans?
A
I do.
B
It's good. Sonic ATM withdraw, Starbucks, Me six my Discord.
A
I pay for a bot. That man moderates it for me.
B
How many people are in your Discord?
A
1100.
B
Lady Jane, Apple Cash Pizza, Taco Bell, Doordash, Apple Bill, Panera. Going in, getting some bull. McDonald's, McDonald's Car Wash. It's not even the wintertime. You. You don't even need it right now. Chick fil a Lady Jane, Apple Bill Brew. Like some Brew Liggins, Cash App, Home Goods. Going into Bull, Apple Bill, Blue Margarita. Get into Bull, Wendy's, Arby Touch Tunes Drink Saloon, Fort and West Foo Lemons concessions, Bog House, Amazon goodies. And again, 25 cents big. There you go. You stopped inside. $3. There again, 25 cents. McDonald's swirl tomatoes, tomatoes Pizza, Amazon Prime Bath and Body Works, Marshall's Panera Bread, Buffalo Wild Wings. Oh, went in, got some Bull Scoops Ice cream, Lady Jane, Spotify and Pole Factory. I don't know. Pole Factory, P U L L Factory.
A
I don't know why it says it's a vape place.
B
Savings went down from 625 to 310. Well done.
A
Winner, chicken dinner. Bunch of chicken dinners on there. Actually.
B
Let's see if we can budget this. It's gonna be interesting because I want you to get an idea. I want you to be able to move to a place that. I don't understand why anyone lives what a lot of people do.
A
I mean, I love Dallas. Compared to Detroit, it's way better.
B
Yeah, everything compared to Detroit. Of course.
A
I saw you're wearing a lion's jersey.
B
Yeah, I support my home state, Austin FC here, Lions there. I'll probably support like New York basketball or something. Who knows? Okay. Neiman Marcus, $40 and $357 for the Freedom Card. Then $240 for the Affirm. 21.43 for the Qualify. But we got a. Well, actually, I'm not freaking out of paying that off early if there's not any back interest. We just need to focus on smallest. That's first. Quicksilver 39, Platinum 25. Car 258.92. Best Buy, $50. And I doubt you're not on a payment plan for the medical. Correct?
A
No.
B
Your debt, minimum payments, $1,211.35. What's your rent or your portion?
A
475.
B
Detroit, ladies and gentlemen, for a house.
A
Utilities, probably another 150.
B
That include any Internet? 200. 200 for Internet, 200 for everything. Oh, 200. Okay. For all utilities. Good phone bill.
A
112E.
B
You obviously owe on your phone, right?
A
Yes.
B
Because you got your new. When you pay that off, switch to helium. If T mobile is good in your area. I know it is in Dallas. So you can do that. It's the budget. Friendly. Same service and everything though room from Drive Drive gas. Because I know you're obsessed with gas cars. So how much?
A
How much do I pay on gas?
B
Yeah.
A
I'd say a buck fifty. 150amonth. I don't drive much.
B
Okay, 150. Car insurance. Michigan most expensive car insurance. State date.
A
We'll say 200. You don't know I'm on my dad's plan.
B
Do you pay it?
A
No.
B
Oh, then we're not putting it in your budget.
A
But I would like to have it in the budget because I'm getting insurance. I'm not going to be on his plan for very long. I'm off.
B
But when. When do you have to start it?
A
Probably next month.
B
Oh, so 200.
A
Yes. I'd like to put that in there.
B
It'll be expensive in Texas and Michigan, but Michigan More expensive.
A
Oh, great.
B
Necessary food. 300 is what you can contribute to the grocery pile. Meal prep. Meal prep. Warm up, up. That's it.
A
300Amonth on groceries? I don't know if I can make that work.
B
You can with math, but also feeding someone. No, that's what you can contribute to the pile. She can contribute 300 as well.
A
Okay.
B
100 to the TP fund. Toothpaste. Anything else you need? Toilet paper. All the good stuff. Medical, health care, Co pays on a monthly basis. Do you have that? Nope. Good. Do you have health? Yes, you do. Right now you're on Medicaid. But you'll be kicked off come next tax season. In fact, this is someone who hasn't filed his taxes in three years getting Medicaid. Isn't that wonderful, Ladies and gentlemen, Our country actually so good. The way we do at. The way we do things. We're just incredible. Okay, subscriptions. What did you need for your business running Cap cut. Just how much?
A
75.
B
75. I'm okay with that. Do you have any pets?
A
Two cats.
B
Okay. Ages and health?
A
They're. They're a year old each. They're. They're cheap. They're very healthy.
B
Health.
A
Very healthy.
B
$100 in pet insurance. How much for cat food?
A
50Amonth. Month. 20 on litter.
B
Anything else that needs to be in your budget that I. Oh, and then 20 on litter. Okay. Anything else that needs to be in your budget that I have not taken in account?
A
Oh, no, you already got car note. No, I think that's everything.
B
I mean, it should be pretty chill. You just don't know how to not go to Neiman Marcus like a dumbass and spend on fast food or going into a gas station getting some single day.
A
Yeah, the food one's huge. If I stop food, I could easily pay another thousand dollars a month.
B
$2,993.35 needed to survive on a minimum basis right now in Dallas or in Detroit.
A
Rate. Meaning.
B
Now, is that average. That.6183. Is that average a month?
A
I think that might be a little inflated.
B
Okay, then how much? Give me a full average.
A
I would say, realistically, on a cross.
B
Everything like a no average month.
A
45 easy.
B
Well, that's very different. 45. Okay, we're going down to 4,500 now, but you still have a extra 15. $6.65 a month. Let's just call it 1,005. Yeah, that's if you actually budget. Here, let me give you 250 of fun. Okay. Okay. $250 of fun. You budget that where you want. Use the dollar wise budgeting app. 1,250 is leftover. Okay. We're not going to consider the medical, we're not going to consider the apartment debt. So your debt besides that right now is $25,313. Divide that by the 1,250. I mean, we pay that off in under two years and then we save up more. We? Yeah, we. If the medical's not in collections, fine. We're not gonna worry about it. I know they're hounding you, but until it shows up on collections, we're not going to care about it.
A
It's going down. When they contact me, it used to be like, we want to settle.
B
Yeah, apartment. Hopefully you save up an extra 4,000. So call it a full two years total. You offer that over and over again until they accept it. Never give them access to your accounts, obviously. So two years to pay off your debt. Can you do two years to pay? Go to Dallas. Listen, you can. You can move to Dallas if you sell your move there cheap and live on the grinds. When I first moved to Austin, I slept on an air mattress for nine months. Listen, you're not gonna do this as a girlfriend, but if you guys save up a little bit of money, move to Dallas, make more money and you're able to net more in the end, I'm still okay with it. You don't have to do this before moving to Dallas. You just have to make the math make sense. But it's a two year debt payoff process. Call it another six months to save up a fully funded emergency fund. Maybe nine months and you're fine. You can move to Dallas or not between then just make the math work, okay? And I'll get you a course career certification as well. If you want to find a higher paying job as well. A lot of people in the audience have done that. I'll get you one for free. That's where we are. That's where we are. Okay. And that's not that bad. It doesn't matter. Use the educational products we get. You'd sign up for the dollar wise budgeting app. You can do this, buddy. I give you $250 of fun and you still get to do this in less time than most people. All right. We're gonna do more drama in the post show and I guess an extra weird finance thing that we didn't to get to come up. But I'm going to give them a hammer. Financial score first spending a budget 010 you overspent debt, there's collection 010 emergency fund took it down not even a thousand 010 retirement don't see anything worth 010 real estate 010 you thought you were too you hammer financial score 0 out of 10 get yours@caleb hammer.com and now click that join button. See an extra 20 minutes of this episode by watching the Financial Auto Post show and three premium shows every single day Monday through Friday, including behind the Audit, behind the Episode, Fat and Fatter and many more. Love you guys.
A
Bye.
B
I want to see the communication you gave to Bibi. A lot of people not like him.
A
Starting to shift that way is it? It's shifting because people are starting to realize he's performative. He's not actually what he says he is.
B
Exclusive Members Content Click the link in the description or pinned comment below and watch thousands of hours of extra and uncensored content.
A
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B
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A
The foundation for you to win more.
B
Deals at the prices you want.
A
There's no theory or fluff in this book.
B
Everything in this book has been field.
A
Tested and it works and I provide downloadable workshops so you can easily implement the strategies.
B
Are you ready to turn first Meetings into your deal foundation differentiator? Order your copy today.
Podcast: Financial Audit
Host: Caleb Hammer
Guest: Dakota, 23, Detroit, MI
Date: Oct 24, 2025
This engaging and eccentric episode features Dakota, a 23-year-old server, social media personality, and member of the furry fandom — notable for being the first furry on Financial Audit. The conversation takes a wild ride through Dakota’s unconventional income streams, his chaotic financial habits, deep debt, and personal stories from the worlds of social media and furry culture. Host Caleb Hammer maintains his signature mix of blunt financial advice, sarcasm, and playful jabs as he tries to get to the root of Dakota's money mess.
"I've probably spent at least 12 grand on my fur collection." – Dakota
"I've had sex with two dudes. I can't be homophobic. I've earned the right to say the f-slur." – Dakota [05:19]
"Now, like right now, I'm making probably an extra 600, $700 a month just from social media. Not including my full-time gig." – Dakota [06:32]
"I think somewhere in the ballpark range of $25,000 to $30,000." – Dakota [36:17]
"Yesterday, I spent $1,000 at Neiman Marcus. On a credit card." – Dakota [21:16]
"You know why I have all this debt is because I know in the future I'm gonna have money. I'm destined for it." – Dakota [18:01]
"If I go to a furry convention, I get treated like how you do in public. ... You know that's me at furry conventions." – Dakota [24:27]
First Impressions:
"This is like when they unmasked Kylo Ren in Episode 7. ... You just look so normal. Little emo." – Caleb [02:51]
On Manifesting Money:
"I know in the future I'm going to have money. I'm destined for it." – Dakota [13:13, 18:01]
On Social Media Consulting:
"I wrote a 16-page document that walks people through what I did to repeat social media success. And it worked." – Dakota [20:28]
On Past Windfalls:
"At 17 years old, I took home $45,000 in a little over 45 days." – Dakota [18:35]
On Buying Expensive Items Impulsively:
"I have these on–shades. I bought a hoodie. I bought $350 cologne. Mind Games, Gambit." – Dakota [21:31]
On Self-Destructive Habits:
"I think it's a thing of self-destruction. ... It just feels good to struggle for some reason in relationships, in friendships, in career choices." – Dakota [54:57]
Caleb’s Frustration:
"This makes no sense the way you're living life. You have a goal, but you're doing... anything and everything to not go to the goal." – Caleb [70:42]
The episode is hilariously self-aware, fast-paced, and peppered with dark humor and candid admissions. Caleb’s relentless prodding and Dakota’s chaotic honesty make for an entertaining yet cautionary lesson in the dangers of impulsive spending, overconfidence in future returns, and the importance of structure. Caleb declares Dakota’s “Hammer Financial Score” as 0 out of 10, a wake-up call accompanied by real advice and hope for change.
“You know what’s up, why don’t you change it? ... I just don’t think I can.” – [25:36]
Financial Auto “Hammer” Score: 0/10
Episode Worth a Listen? Absolutely — if you’re interested in personal finance, internet culture, or simply want to see what happens when a “terminally online” millennial gets roasted—and coached—on their money mistakes.