Financial Audit's Most Disturbing Episode

Summary

Financial Audit Podcast

Episode: Financial Audit's Most Disturbing Episode

Host: Caleb Hammer | Guests: Lindsay, Christian, Philli (Guest) Air Date: March 4, 2026

---

Episode Overview

This episode features Philli, a 27-year-old fire protection engineer from Upper Sandusky, Ohio, who presents a chaotic personal financial situation entangled with emotionally charged life events and controversies. Caleb, Lindsay, and Christian dissect Philli's stream of poor financial decisions, problematic relationships, and a parade of rumors and allegations, all laced with the show's trademark irreverent, relentless tone.

The conversation veers between brutally honest financial critique, incredulous laughter at Philli's choices, and deep dives into the social drama that has upended his life—making for what Caleb brands “the most disturbing Financial Audit episode” yet.

---

Key Discussion Points and Insights

1. Introduction & Background

• [01:03] Philli introduces himself as a 27-year-old fire protection engineer who recently moved jobs, now earning $38.50/hr and facing a possible move to Jacksonville, Florida.
• Upper Sandusky, OH vs. Jacksonville, FL cost-of-living comparison: hosts argue the pay bump does not compensate for the living cost increase.

“You are absolutely losing money. Regardless of, like, a few hundred bucks a year in state income tax. We’re talking tens of thousands.” — Lindsay [05:19]

2. Job Changes & Career Struggles

• Philli left his previous $70K salary job due to workplace dissatisfaction and overwork.
• New job offers overtime and higher pay but requires relocation.
• Hosts question the logic of moving given the cost-of-living tradeoffs and uncertainty about selling his house.

3. Homeownership & Mortgage Mishaps

• [06:09] Philli owns a modest home bought in 2022, expected to have about $10K in equity if sold.
• Struggling to sell due to outdated features (carpet/wallpaper, 2bd/1ba).
• Consistently late on mortgage despite affordable $579/mo payment.

“That is a very affordable mortgage that most people would literally murder for in the United States… and you’re missing it.”—Lindsay [14:28]

4. Financially Enabling Relationships

• Large portions of Philli’s money go to helping (mostly platonic, often online) friends—specifically attractive women he’s never met in person.
• Hosts challenge the rationale and label the behavior as “simping” or being “milked” by e-girls.
• He claims it’s platonic generosity, but hosts push back on self-awareness.

“You’re just out here giving money to women that do nothing because they’re my friend.”—Lindsay [13:15]
“You don’t know what the term friendship means.” —Caleb [15:09]

5. Allegations, Accusations & Social Drama

• Philli outlines a disconcerting series of rumors and accusations—including sexual assault and pedophilia accusations (all denied and not substantiated).
• Details how ex-partners and acquaintances have made false claims post-breakup or as rumors of revenge.
• The hosts oscillate between sympathy and skepticism, repeatedly asking why these events keep happening to a “nobody.”

“Why has it happened three times to someone who nobody knows?” —Lindsay [29:04]

6. Chaotic Debt and Spending Habits

• Massive debt pile-up via home equity line of credit (HELOC), high-interest personal loans, credit cards, and “Pay Later” services such as Affirm, Klarna, and Sezzle.
• Rapid equity drain: within months of taking HELOC, money gone on motorcycles, electronics, frivolous purchases.
• Constant late payments, overdraft fees ($579 mortgage, 117 overdraft fees in one year).
• Uses multiple high-interest loans and consolidation attempts, most backed by collateral (e.g., his truck).

“$25,876.95 on it. That’s more than your literal mortgage payment.” —Lindsay [48:09] “117 overdraft fees this year. What are you—what are you?” —Christian [83:12]

7. Spending Analyzed

• Incessant small purchases on energy drinks, snacks, fast food, Amazon and TikTok shop items, gaming, hunting equipment, streaming/subscriptions.
• Rarely cooks or budgets; thousands spent on DoorDash during post-surgery recovery.

“Almost $2,000 at DoorDash in a singular month.” —Caleb [68:18]

8. Excuses vs. Accountability

• Recurrent theme: blaming others (ex-girlfriend, parents, banks) vs. accepting personal responsibility.
• Lived at home until 23, describes being overprotected, leading to financial recklessness upon moving out.
• Parents enabled by shielding him from paying for essentials; hosts unimpressed by the lack of accountability.

“You ever taken responsibility for anything in your entire life?” —Caleb [50:27]

9. Personal Life: Red Flags and Other Disasters

• Serial bad relationships, a penchant for drama (“I make terrible choices...especially women”).
• Ex allegedly killed his cat, got him fired from jobs, accused him falsely.
• Cycle of financial and personal disasters tied to impulsivity, poor emotional regulation, and questionable associates.

10. Budget Assessment & Recommendations

• Caleb computes minimum debt payments:
  • Debt payments (non-mortgage): $1,604/mo
  • Mortgage: $579/mo
  • Utilities, insurance, food, subscriptions, pet insurance: adds up near his post-tax income of ~$4,800/mo.
• Suggestion: don’t move, minimize cost of living, get old job back, consider bankruptcy after a period of budget proof—there’s “no way out” without a total reset.

“You have no more of a privileged position than anyone else in the history of the show...and you have thrown it away.” —Caleb [85:26]

---

Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

The Simp Problem

• [13:04] “They’re milking you without you getting the benefit of getting milked.” —Lindsay

Debt Spiral

• [47:28] “You are not a credit card person. You can use the Fizz card, debit card that builds credit. I will never allow you to have debt in your life. You’re a moron. You can’t handle it to save your life.” —Caleb

Self-Sabotage

• [51:17] “Outflow was probably around $9,000, I’d imagine, including the Lendmark [loan].” —Philli

Overdraft Disasters

• [83:12] “You’ve had 117 overdraft fees this year. What have you done to your life? This makes no sense.” —Christian

On Blame

• [50:27] “You ever taken responsibility for anything in your life?” —Caleb

Life’s Perspective

• [14:49] “People would kill for that [mortgage].” —Lindsay
• [86:03] “How did it take so long for you to get on the show? Somehow I…” —Caleb
• [85:42] “You have thrown it away. You have destroyed your life.” —Caleb

---

Timestamps for Key Segments

• 01:03 Guest Introduction & Salary Details
• 06:09 Selling the House and Mortgage Discussion
• 09:28 Money Given to Friends and Relationship Status
• 12:05 Social Media "Friends" & Simping Exposed
• 14:28 Missed Mortgage Payments and Debt
• 18:00 Job Hopping and Odd Work History
• 20:00 Allegations: Assault, False Accusations, and Ex Girlfriend Drama
• 36:25 Deep into Loan Chaos
• 47:00 High Interest, Credit, and Loan Utilization
• 62:00 Purchase Audit: Affirm, Amazon, TikTok, Snacks, Guns, Cosplay, Overdrafts
• 68:10 DoorDash Addiction and Tailbone Surgeries
• 83:12 Overdraft Fee Disaster Revealed
• 85:22 Budget & Debt Payoff Calculation/Reality Check
• 89:03 Final Budget Recommendations: Bankruptcy, Old Job, Cost of Living
• 90:53 Paying Down Debts: Avalanche vs. Snowball Discussion

---

Summary Table

| Topic | Details | |----------------------------|--------------------------------------------------------------| | Income | ~$4,800/mo (after taxes); new job in FL may pay more | | Mortgage | $579/mo; affordable but frequently late | | Total Consumer Debt | ~$80,000+ (HELOC, loans, credit cards, “Pay Later” plans) | | Overdraft Fees | 117 in 2025 alone | | Spending Habits | Snacks, energy drinks, DoorDash, Amazon, TikTok, gaming | | Financial Behavior | Debt consolidation cycles, no savings, impulse buying | | Relationships & Drama | Serial toxic relationships, online simping, false accusations| | Recommended Actions | Stay put, extreme budgeting, possible bankruptcy, old job |

---

Takeaway: A Cautionary Trainwreck

Tone: The hosts, as ever, are unapologetically brash, mixing morbid humor, genuine concern, and sharp chastisement. Philli’s episode is a cautionary tale in self-destruction by neglecting both personal boundaries and financial basics. The episode stands out for its disturbing blend of interpersonal chaos and fiscal disaster, laying bare the interconnected messes of modern digital life and impulsive, unaccountable choices.

Transcript

[Caleb Hammer]

To watch episodes of Financial Audit a week earlier. Check us out on YouTube. So what about when you someone.

[Philli]

I did not. All right. It was allegations. One of her friends messaged me and was like, oh, so you think it's funny doing that to a woman?

[Caleb Hammer]

And your ex accused you of assaulting her daughter. Yeah, well, as a third thing, Islamophobic and no. And kid diddler.

[Philli]

No.

[Caleb Hammer]

Not stacking up well for you, I don't think it's.

[Philli]

Also, it's not all my fault. Not every time.

[Lindsay]

Dollar Wise is finally here, sending waves through the personal finance world. This is officially now the best budgeting app on the market. And I'm giving you a special deal to download but only through March 31st. Take a free three day trial to test it out and then you get the monthly plan at a 33 discount for the first three months or the annual plan at an insane 50 discount. And with the annual, you get my budget friendly cookbook and my brand new 30 day detailed budget meal plan signed by me and mailed directly to you. After March 31st, the cookbook is going away forever. So this is literally your last chance. Don't miss the opportunity of a lifetime. Download Dollar Wise to start your free TR to Dollar Wise.com or click the link below.

[Philli]

I'm Philli. I'm 27 years old. I am from Upper Sandusky, Ohio and this is Financial Audit.

[Lindsay]

Yes, it is. Thanks for coming down from Ohio, everyone's least favorite state.

[Philli]

Hey. Okay.

[Caleb Hammer]

It's okay. You're fine.

[Philli]

I know you're from Michigan and there's a little bit of.

[Caleb Hammer]

It's literally everyone's favorite state, but that's okay. What do you do for a living in Upper Sandusky?

[Philli]

I am a fire protection engineer.

[Caleb Hammer]

Are you sure you're not a banker?

[Philli]

I am sure I'm not a banker. No, cuz if I was a banker, if I was something different, I would be probably better with money than I actually.

[Caleb Hammer]

Something different?

[Philli]

I don't know. I got a big nose.

[Caleb Hammer]

Like what man the comb over.

[Philli]

Okay, well that. That was because of a bad haircut I got yesterday.

[Caleb Hammer]

Orthodox beard. Fire engineer.

[Philli]

Yeah. Yep. I designed the sprinkler systems for buildings.

[Caleb Hammer]

It's exciting. I think. Maybe. I don't know. What do you make doing that? That sounds like potential money.

[Philli]

My company that I was at was making 70, 000 salary that you were at? Yes.

[Caleb Hammer]

Well, what the. Does that mean that. Okay, how about the company you are at?

[Philli]

The company I'm at now I make.

[Christian]

But I give A.

[Lindsay]

Hold on. Before you even tell me why the. Would you even give me the.

[Caleb Hammer]

The company I want? Because when you ask me my job, you know, in my income, can you ask me my job and income?

[Lindsay]

Like, what do you do for a living?

[Philli]

What do you do for a living? And how much do you make?

[Caleb Hammer]

I'm a YouTuber, but when I worked at Jimmy John's I made minimum wage.

[Lindsay]

You see how this, what you talk. Why do I want to give a shit? I mean, I'm sorry I'm derailing the conversation, but just. What a weird answer.

[Caleb Hammer]

Like, I'm like, I feel like I've given. Someone gave me that answer once also in the history of the show, which by the way, makes you an extreme minority.

[Lindsay]

But I said, I just don't get.

[Caleb Hammer]

Like, why would you even.

[Lindsay]

Okay, do you want to.

[Caleb Hammer]

Why. Why did you say that?

[Philli]

I said that because I just started this job a week ago.

[Caleb Hammer]

Why does it matter today? Okay.

[Philli]

And all these finances were during that. That old job. I don't have a whole lot of.

[Caleb Hammer]

Okay, well what do you make now?

[Philli]

Ohio? I make 3,850 an hour.

[Caleb Hammer]

Okay, what does that translate to?

[Philli]

Um, I'm not 100% sure yet. Cause I haven't had a paycheck since I just started that a week ago today.

[Caleb Hammer]

Okay. What was your hourly in the last one?

[Philli]

It was salary. I was salary my last one at 70,000. I brought at the time. I brought home 985 a week.

[Caleb Hammer]

Okay. 3,850 at. I'm assuming 40 hours a week, right? Yes.

[Philli]

Yep. That's gonna be baseline.

[Caleb Hammer]

80,000 bucks?

[Philli]

Yeah. Yep.

[Caleb Hammer]

Okay. And your salary was 70.

[Philli]

Yeah.

[Caleb Hammer]

And what was hitting your account on a bi weekly basis or whatever it was?

[Philli]

Weekly basis was 95. That was after health insurance, dent vision, as well as any.

[Caleb Hammer]

985.

[Philli]

985. Yeah. Okay.

[Caleb Hammer]

I'm going to assume. Divided by 12, I'm going to assume you're at like $4,800 a month after taxes now.

[Philli]

Now probably I'm going to. Probably would be close to that for the new job. It does require me to move to Florida.

[Caleb Hammer]

Oh, you're moving?

[Philli]

Possibly.

[Lindsay]

Well, that's better.

[Philli]

Sunny, warm Jacksonville, though, I don't know. So it's not ideal. Everyone from Florida always says, like, Jacksonville is like not the ideal place to go.

[Caleb Hammer]

Well, you'll be able to snorkel from 100ft down by just looking up at the size of that thing. So. All right, get excited. Your best self is just ahead of you. Okay.

[Philli]

Yeah.

[Lindsay]

Well, this is exciting moving to Florida, right?

[Philli]

Yeah. If I decide to go through with it, it will be.

[Caleb Hammer]

I assume it's going to be a dramatic increase in cost of living though between Jacksonville, Florida and middle of absolutely nowhere, Upper Sandusky. Not the good Sandusky, where your point is Ohio. So the $10,000 increase you have in pay, is that actually making the gap?

[Philli]

It's. Well, it's also unlimited overtime and they are. The company is severely behind.

[Caleb Hammer]

Household income in the 70,000 hour range is a very good income in Upper Sandusky, whereas it's halfway. See where that Same translates to 118000 in cost of living and okay, why would you even. Did you get fired?

[Philli]

I did not get fired. Okay.

[Lindsay]

Well, with the move that is required,

[Caleb Hammer]

you are absolutely losing money. Regardless of like a few hundred bucks a year in state income tax. We're talking tens of thousands.

[Lindsay]

Tens of thousands separated. What is that like 50, 000 bucks separated and cost of living alone. Adjusting for where you were at 70,000

[Caleb Hammer]

hours, you would have to make 120 there.

[Philli]

I did not do that research. They, they said they don't want me down. They want me down there before February 28th.

[Caleb Hammer]

Oh, that's coming quick.

[Philli]

Yes, but they said that if I can, if I have to push it off a little bit, I can like a month, a little bit into March.

[Caleb Hammer]

Well, a move isn't the necessarily the hardest thing in the world. Depends where you are. I mean, I moved down to Austin from Kalamazoo when I got a new job opportunity. In about a week of accepting it, I just literally sold as much as I could throw away the rest pack up as the Dan and moved on down. Cost me like a couple hundred bucks max.

[Philli]

Well, the hardest part is just going to be selling the house.

[Caleb Hammer]

You own a house?

[Philli]

Yes, I have a mortgage in a

[Caleb Hammer]

place where no one wants to live. Yeah, that is going to be difficult.

[Philli]

Yep.

[Lindsay]

Oh, okay. Well, 27 homeowner.

[Caleb Hammer]

That's pretty good. How long have you owned it?

[Philli]

March of 22.

[Caleb Hammer]

Okay. Hopefully that has given us some distance in the actual equity position from the time you've owned it with market movements for you to sell in. Now I have to write a check. And we know how people like you don't like to write checks. That'll be very disappointing.

[Philli]

A little bit. I have a little bit of position probably like if I sell it what it's expected to sell at, it'd probably be like 10,000 equity after, after closing costs, after everything.

[Caleb Hammer]

10,000 when you walk away with nothing.

[Philli]

Yeah, because I think right. What it's expected to sell at or what's anticipated is like it's like 30,000 above what I owe.

[Caleb Hammer]

Okay, but you say you have the

[Lindsay]

opportunity to back out.

[Caleb Hammer]

What's so unique about this opportunity to

[Philli]

back out versus just like if I want it, if I wanted to, I could quit the job and stay where I am.

[Caleb Hammer]

Well, sure. What about your last job? Are they ready to take you back?

[Philli]

I could possibly go back.

[Caleb Hammer]

Possibly. That doesn't sound very confident. So you'd be incomeless? Possibly.

[Philli]

Well that's. Yeah, exactly. Like I don't.

[Caleb Hammer]

It would be like one. What's your confidence level of taking that job back?

[Philli]

I'm pretty confident that they would take me back.

[Caleb Hammer]

But listed.

[Philli]

No, it's not. It's not listed.

[Lindsay]

Okay.

[Caleb Hammer]

I just have the house. I just have the house.

[Philli]

No, Lindsay found the listing form and whatever.

[Christian]

Oh, two bed, one bath.

[Lindsay]

That's hard to sell.

[Philli]

But. But if you look at the pictures, there's room to make it a three bed.

[Lindsay]

If I look at the pictures, hopefully

[Caleb Hammer]

they are updated because.

[Lindsay]

Wow.

[Caleb Hammer]

That is carpet and wallpaper throughout the entire.

[Philli]

I changed all the wall. As much of the wallpaper as I could.

[Caleb Hammer]

Tell me you changed the carpet.

[Philli]

Carpet. I did not. Because it was brand new carpet at the time and I didn't want the

[Lindsay]

carpet throughout the house. You shouldn't have that. Regardless, no one wants that.

[Philli]

Yeah, I know I need to.

[Lindsay]

It is in the 80s, 70s.

[Philli]

If I move. If I ended up moving down to Florida. I was considering renting it out if I could find somebody.

[Caleb Hammer]

But it says principal balance is only 80,000. So you would have a great equity position.

[Philli]

Well, it's. We. We. We will get into that. It's a little different than you. Than you think it is.

[Christian]

What there's late.

[Caleb Hammer]

I'm getting. Oh for. Okay, well that will be.

[Philli]

Yep.

[Lindsay]

Okay, well we'll get into that soon. What the. Dude, it's not an expensive house, especially income. You were get on in a place

[Caleb Hammer]

that is cheap as a dick and you're considering moving with the cost of

[Lindsay]

living gap and you can't even pay your mortgage.

[Christian]

What are you doing? What are you doing?

[Lindsay]

What the is wrong with you? What are you considering? Would you even accept this job? Why did you leave that job and

[Caleb Hammer]

get a new job? What was the point?

[Philli]

Because the. Well, at my old job I was very. I was kind of like fed up with a lot of things they were doing. They were. I mean obviously it was salary so it was 40 hours is what I was being my base pay, but I didn't get overtime, and I was working like 55 to 60 hours, a lot of weeks to try to catch up. And then they just kept throwing more projects on my plate, even though I told them I'm like, way behind. I need time to catch up. And then just things with, like, other people in the office, I just did not enjoy being there anymore. And it was kind of like. It was kind of ruining my whole life.

[Caleb Hammer]

Well, I'm literally being told you're here because you're just endlessly being a and sending girls money.

[Philli]

Most of them are my female friends. Yes.

[Caleb Hammer]

Female.

[Philli]

Okay, okay.

[Caleb Hammer]

I'm not in soul language.

[Philli]

Okay.

[Caleb Hammer]

Are you getting laid?

[Christian]

5, 4, 3, 2, 1.

[Philli]

No, I'm not even trying to with any of them.

[Caleb Hammer]

You're a virgin?

[Philli]

No, no, far from it.

[Lindsay]

Okay, so why again, am I being

[Caleb Hammer]

told, like, a lot of your financial problems have to do with you being a MILF hunter and just sending women money left and right. What the is going on?

[Philli]

The cut part is because I have a lot of friends who suck with money just as bad as I do.

[Caleb Hammer]

But when I do the one sending them money, and then when I do

[Philli]

get a little bit of money, I help them out when I can.

[Caleb Hammer]

The women vaginas.

[Philli]

Well, I mean, they're women, but I don't get anything out of them because they're. They're just my.

[Caleb Hammer]

What's the relationships to them?

[Philli]

Platonic. Fully. They're just my friends.

[Caleb Hammer]

And how close are you to them?

[Philli]

A few of them I know in person and then a couple of just social media.

[Sponsor Voice]

Get in the game with the college branded Venmo debit card. Rep your team with every tap and earn up to 5% cash back with Venmo Stash, a new rewards program from Venmo. No monthly fee, no minimum balance. Just school pride and spending power. Get in the game and sign up for the Venmo debit [e-mail] collegecard. The Venmo MasterCard is issued by the Bancorp Bank. NA Select Schools available. Venmo stash terms and exclusions [e-mail] terms max $100 cash back per month.

[Lindsay]

There it is.

[Caleb Hammer]

What? Social media friends. What? You're sending money to social media friends that are attractive. Are they attractive?

[Philli]

Well, yeah.

[Caleb Hammer]

Okay.

[Philli]

I don't have ugly friends.

[Caleb Hammer]

There it is. There it is.

[Philli]

I'm not friends with ugly people.

[Lindsay]

Huh.

[Caleb Hammer]

Can I see these social media ladies? They won't be put on Screen just for me.

[Lindsay]

My eyes only.

[Caleb Hammer]

My. My precious eyes only. And I will tell you where they are on the goon scale because I think you all kind of understand what's going on here. Hey, Florida, they got lots of bbls and fake titties there. You'll be happy, but you'll also be blowing your load. And by your load, I mean your wallet towards them.

[Philli]

Let me see if I can.

[Caleb Hammer]

You go to surf clubs?

[Philli]

No, I don't. I've never been to one.

[Caleb Hammer]

Okay, well, that's good, because you would lose.

[Philli]

They don't. They don't really teach me.

[Caleb Hammer]

Because you haven't been. That's what I told. I used to think I've been told

[Philli]

that one of my friends lives up in Cleveland. And he goes. And he goes with his girlfriend quite a bit. I'm like, dude, you have.

[Caleb Hammer]

Yeah, I want to find girlfriend. Okay, you.

[Philli]

There's the one girl that I'm friends with. Yes, I know. Wait. Tasty. Like, she just posts a lot of random shit, but she's also one of

[Caleb Hammer]

my random shit that are thirst traps.

[Philli]

Okay, that's one that you just scrolled. That you scrolled on.

[Caleb Hammer]

Well, first of all, it was the one that you showed me. Okay.

[Philli]

It was just big lip, though.

[Caleb Hammer]

And like. Wait.

[Philli]

Yeah, like. Okay, yeah, she's one. She's one of my friends.

[Caleb Hammer]

Okay, That's a. If you.

[Philli]

If you scroll up, we follow each other.

[Caleb Hammer]

Okay. I can show a picture that's not her face, right? To them.

[Philli]

Yeah. Because as long as it's not like her profile.

[Caleb Hammer]

This is what she is showing. This is what he's sending pictures.

[Philli]

Which one is it? It's not pictures. It's. It's just.

[Caleb Hammer]

No, this is what she's posting online. No shit.

[Philli]

Trying to get money. Yeah, but like, dude, what? Yeah, we've been friends. Okay.

[Lindsay]

Oh, my gosh.

[Caleb Hammer]

That's such a goon. She's showing like that. Like, we know what's happening here.

[Lindsay]

That's that you're not. They're milking you. They're milking you without you getting the benefit of getting milked.

[Philli]

I mean, I guess. Yeah.

[Lindsay]

At least if you were having problem,

[Caleb Hammer]

I could give you a high five because you're nutting. And I think we're all pretty okay with what consenting adults do these days. I don't really give a. Yeah, but

[Lindsay]

you're just out there giving money to women that do nothing because they're my friend.

[Caleb Hammer]

And you're like a super Christian because they're my tattoo cross and Everything. He was bragging about it when I walked in the door, like, it was.

[Philli]

I'm proud of it.

[Lindsay]

Okay, good.

[Caleb Hammer]

Well, yeah, Almost knocking up women left and right with raw. Raw dickies, I guess. Like, what is that?

[Philli]

No one's.

[Caleb Hammer]

That what's perfect.

[Philli]

No one's perfect.

[Caleb Hammer]

Okay.

[Philli]

Got to repent sometimes.

[Lindsay]

They're your virtual friend. Have you ever met them?

[Philli]

In my brain.

[Lindsay]

Have you ever met them?

[Philli]

No, not in person, no. In my brain, they are strictly platonic.

[Christian]

You've never met them?

[Philli]

Not in person, no.

[Caleb Hammer]

You're a simp.

[Philli]

No.

[Caleb Hammer]

What. What? By the way, again? Passed you on a mortgage and sending these Asian e. Girl titty chicks money? What the are we doing?

[Philli]

It wasn't that much.

[Caleb Hammer]

You're calling it friendship? There is so much more happening in that brain than that that you're not willing to acknowledge.

[Philli]

If anything, it's all subconscious that I don't even think about. But, like, that's what I just said. And. And my conscious mind, it's just purely platonic. And just me helping my friends. That's all it is in my mind.

[Caleb Hammer]

Why are they getting money when the.

[Lindsay]

When the mortgage isn't?

[Philli]

Because the mortgage.

[Lindsay]

That is a very affordable mortgage that

[Caleb Hammer]

most people literally murder for in the United States, like, the median home price is, like, 350.

[Lindsay]

Dude, you're at 120. You bought it for 112 or whatever.

[Philli]

128.

[Caleb Hammer]

128. And it's worth 140.

[Lindsay]

Okay.

[Caleb Hammer]

Yeah, that's right.

[Lindsay]

Like, people would kill for that.

[Philli]

Yeah, I know. I know.

[Lindsay]

And you're missing it.

[Caleb Hammer]

The goon.

[Lindsay]

But only mentally. To friends that we've never met online

[Philli]

that are all the same.

[Lindsay]

Titty, Asian.

[Caleb Hammer]

They're all the same, though not in a racist way. They're literally all the same. You're picking the same, like, architect.

[Philli]

I mean, I got attractive friends. What can I say? My friends are attractive friends that you've

[Caleb Hammer]

never met that you send money to that post booby shots online. I think you don't know what the term friendship means.

[Philli]

I mean, we're friends and we talk to each other so often. We're not, like, super close friends.

[Caleb Hammer]

And if you ever stopped giving them money, do you think you would still be talking to them?

[Philli]

I haven't given anybody money in months.

[Caleb Hammer]

Months?

[Philli]

A couple months.

[Caleb Hammer]

Yeah, a couple months. See, it just gets months to a couple months. It's gonna be even less than that soon enough, and I'm sure once. Listen, a couple months isn't long enough for someone to be, like, oh, this person's done. Well, we have money giving in the statements I'm being told. So like literally it's in the statement. So what are we talking about? Dude?

[Lindsay]

Okay, so I don't understand this job. Why did you accept it? Because you're moving to Florida.

[Caleb Hammer]

The cost of living is going to be completely from the small ass town that you're from where nothing happens. And that's okay. I understand wanting to leave but trying to translate 70 to 80. But there were that 70 is worth 120 just about like what.

[Lindsay]

What is our thought, what's our mentality? What is happening?

[Philli]

So it was, it was have more

[Caleb Hammer]

money to send to the Asian E Girls.

[Philli]

No, not that. It was a mixture of like when I spoke to the guy who owns the company, he reached out to me directly, he called my phone number and he was telling me like he pretty much asked me like how much I made and he was like oh, if we give you this much more would that help like if you like get, get us on. Get you on our side? I'm like well that depends. Like do I have to move down there or can I work remote? And he said he would want me to remove down now as soon as I can. But like in a realistic way where I'm not screwing myself over.

[Caleb Hammer]

Sure. But then he also still the regardless if you move one or three months later the income translation.

[Philli]

But he also pretty much let me pick how much I wanted for a relocation bonus.

[Caleb Hammer]

I mean just long term wise. I mean you're not up long term there even still I'm still concerned about this massive cost of living gap. Yeah, because you're literally coming from the place that no one wants to live. Which is why it is so cheap to live there. There's classic demand. Yep. It's low to a place where demand is high. Florida is one of the most high influx states outside of Texas.

[Philli]

Yeah, well the other thing too is like me personally, I hate having free time because that's how I get into these.

[Caleb Hammer]

That means nothing to me. If there is work to do is still the question.

[Philli]

Well, it's also like the overtime and everything from the main job. But I also would be immediately looking for a second job as soon as I get there because when I have the free time.

[Caleb Hammer]

You have a second job now. What is that?

[Philli]

It's just a gas station. Casey's.

[Lindsay]

That's your second job?

[Philli]

Well, the first two weeks there I put in like I'm not looking down on that job.

[Caleb Hammer]

But you seem like you'd Be able to do something else remote and like higher paid.

[Philli]

I would like to, but I haven't really done a whole lot of research into like.

[Caleb Hammer]

Yeah, what's your degree?

[Philli]

Associates in mechanical engineering.

[Caleb Hammer]

Associates.

[Philli]

Yeah.

[Caleb Hammer]

Okay, that's fine.

[Philli]

I went to.

[Caleb Hammer]

I'll get you a course. Career certification. I was actually in the tech world.

[Philli]

I wanted to get into project management or get you a product managers have that.

[Caleb Hammer]

It does, so we'll do that. A lot of people in the audience have used it to get a lot of higher pay jobs or different jobs.

[Philli]

I was looking into it.

[Caleb Hammer]

But you had a second job at Taco Bell.

[Philli]

Yeah.

[Caleb Hammer]

That's what I thought your second job was.

[Philli]

It was at first. I got fired on my. When I was fired at Taco Bell.

[Caleb Hammer]

How do you get fired at Taco Bell? What's wrong with you?

[Philli]

I worked with a couple of my friends and one of them was a guy friend. One of them was platonic. And here we go with the friends.

[Lindsay]

What is happening?

[Caleb Hammer]

What is happening? I thought you were stealing change from the control.

[Philli]

So the guy friend, I, he like made a joke, like make it like a little dig at me. So I kind of like slapped his ass a little bit in like a friendly way. Very Christian. I'm very straight. I'm very straight. It was a.

[Caleb Hammer]

Says every straight guy anyway. Usually most straight guys don't have to defend their straightness. I'd say the gayest thing besides taking a dick in your ass is being, you know, potentially offended about your masculinity.

[Philli]

I get that. No, I. It was kind of. He made a dig at me, so I kind of like did that as a joke back. Whatever.

[Caleb Hammer]

And then Brandon, Mika, Christian and I roast each other constantly.

[Philli]

Yeah.

[Caleb Hammer]

I've never touched one of their cheeks.

[Philli]

Well, me and my friends are next to.

[Caleb Hammer]

Huh?

[Philli]

Me and my.

[Caleb Hammer]

Okay, you get in there, you get into Christian's cheeks. See, he gets it when he roasts.

[Philli]

Yeah, just like a little game.

[Caleb Hammer]

But not like roast back. Because you roast back. Yeah, well, but not you. I do.

[Philli]

And then I just get like a little back in. No, no, it's a little backhand. Like I got a nice one. Like whatever. No, not a little. Not a little grabby. No.

[Caleb Hammer]

In 2026 that was considered.

[Philli]

Honestly, you're probably right. Well, that's a different story. I don't. I don't think I told Lindsey that. I didn't do anything. It was allegations.

[Lindsay]

Hold on.

[Caleb Hammer]

I do want to get to that because that is very interesting.

[Philli]

That might be a post show thing.

[Caleb Hammer]

No, that Might be what you're about to say immediately after this, but. Okay, you touched your. You.

[Philli]

Yeah.

[Caleb Hammer]

You slid into your friend's ass. Okay.

[Philli]

That's all it was. And then my platonic friend, I'd be friends with her. Someone had specifically called her out to go back and do dishes.

[Caleb Hammer]

And she is a woman.

[Philli]

And I made a joke. I'm like, yeah, go do the dishes like you're supposed to.

[Caleb Hammer]

And no, that's a good joke.

[Philli]

Well, I said, Well, I think what I said was I go do. Go do the dishes like a woman should.

[Caleb Hammer]

Yeah, it's friends banter.

[Philli]

I know someone else was in there.

[Caleb Hammer]

A tick tocker.

[Philli]

Didn't like hearing no. Someone working.

[Caleb Hammer]

Yeah, no, did not.

[Philli]

Yeah, exactly. Did not like it. Told the store manager and said that I made them uncomfortable by saying that

[Caleb Hammer]

our culture has gone downhill. You can't even make a joke with a friend.

[Lindsay]

You suck with money.

[Caleb Hammer]

So you download a budgeting app. You start with the classic one. Ynab, but everyone just deletes it because it's way too complicated to use.

[Lindsay]

So you go to everydollar.

[Caleb Hammer]

That's Dave Ramsey, the personal finance guy, Right.

[Lindsay]

Well, they're gonna force you to use it his way. That's not very personal.

[Caleb Hammer]

Finances. Rocket Money that you got a lot

[Lindsay]

of commercials, but they're owned by Rocket Mortgage.

[Caleb Hammer]

Guess what they want to sell you in the end.

[Lindsay]

Then there's the new guy on the block, Monarch. Hundreds of millions of dollars of private

[Caleb Hammer]

equity raising so far.

[Lindsay]

But private equity doesn't have the best track record when it comes to private data. That's why I like Dollarwise. Built by these people just like you,

[Caleb Hammer]

for people just like you.

[Lindsay]

No private equity, no gimmicks. Just the best budgeting app there is.

[Caleb Hammer]

Download it now.

[Lindsay]

Start the free trial Dollarwise.com link in the description below. That's kind of stupid, I'll be honest. But what's not is actually getting a checking account that gives you free money.

[Christian]

Free money.

[Lindsay]

We like free money. You can get up to $350 in bonus cash right now when you sign up for the checking account that I use, Chime. Also, it makes your savings grow at a 3.5 APY interest rate. Guys. You can watch Financial Audit and get

[Caleb Hammer]

free money at the same time. Who would have thought? That's incredible.

[Lindsay]

Check it out.

[Caleb Hammer]

Link in the description below.

[Lindsay]

Sign up for chime. Get that $350 right now in your checking account.

[Philli]

I called the. I called Taco Bell the one weekend I was like, hey, like, I don't know my schedule. The app isn't working. Like, what am I supposed to be in next? And they were like, oh, we're actually going to have to let you go because you made some comments and made someone uncomfortable.

[Caleb Hammer]

Redditors and tiktokers ruining it all for rest of us.

[Philli]

Yeah, so that kind of did that.

[Caleb Hammer]

Just like you ruined the Middle east, honestly.

[Philli]

Maybe it meant the. And then the next day, right after that phone call, I actually ruined it

[Caleb Hammer]

themselves a long time before.

[Philli]

Yeah, the next day after that conversation with Taco Bell where I got fired, I got a call from the store manager at Casey's, and they're like, hey, are you still interested in working for us?

[Caleb Hammer]

Okay. I'm like, so what about when you someone.

[Philli]

I did not. All right. It was allegations.

[Caleb Hammer]

Do tell.

[Philli]

So it was.

[Caleb Hammer]

None of us know about this.

[Philli]

It's gonna be really bad. Even the producer. Two different times where I was accused.

[Caleb Hammer]

Listen, if you were a social media influencer, I would. I would. I would accept that. Because every social media influencer has fake accusations. That's just the reality. However, you are, and no offense to you, a nobody, which means there's no reason for accusations to be against you.

[Philli]

I'm not really, like, I'm not an influencer. I only have a couple thousand on Tick Tock, but I have friends that are like over a million on Tick Tock that I'm friends.

[Caleb Hammer]

Yeah, but that doesn't translate.

[Philli]

But, no, this was a year and a half ago or whatever, but I went to visit one of my friends and help. She was. Help. She was having me help in her house.

[Caleb Hammer]

Yeah. Okay.

[Philli]

Well, I was. She was paying me to help fix her septic tank.

[Sponsor Voice]

I can take care of your pipe, ma'.

[Philli]

Am.

[Lindsay]

I do my own plumbing.

[Philli]

Okay. Because it was broken. She was paying me. Well, we ended up hooking up that night. Maybe if I can figure out another form of payment.

[Guest Voice]

You mean like a check?

[Philli]

And then the day after, or maybe a couple of days after, after I got home, one of her friends messaged me and was like, oh, so you think it's funny doing that to a woman? I'm like, what are you talking about? And he's like, well, you. You think it's funny forcing a woman into having sex with you? I'm like, where did that come from? Because it was fully consensual. And I found out through a group chat with me, him, her, and one other person that she had lied to them and told them that I kind of forced myself onto them. And I recounted the whole story, like minute for minute of what happened. And they were like, oh, is that true? Asking her and she said it was all true what I said, admitting that she lied.

[Lindsay]

Unfortunately, for what it's worth, they do that a lot these days.

[Caleb Hammer]

I really don't understand why. It's actually kind of crazy. Yeah, 2020 ruined a lot of people's brains and they immediately look for victimhood. And yes, it is very weird. I'm glad to hear that she backtracked when called out, as she should.

[Philli]

She did.

[Caleb Hammer]

And if she. If you face any real world consequences for it, she should go to jail. But it sounds like you didn't.

[Lindsay]

But you got a second one.

[Guest Voice]

Fool me. We can't get fooled again.

[Philli]

The second one was just purely a lie because somebody that I call was

[Caleb Hammer]

the first one not a lie. Well, I mean so far I was on your side based on the fact that she backed. But this.

[Philli]

So the second one was like nothing even happened between me and any woman at all in this situation. It was someone that I caught cheating on his girlfriend with three other women.

[Caleb Hammer]

Did not caught a guy cheating on him.

[Philli]

I caught a guy cheating on four women in total and he did not like me at all because of it. So he started spreading false rumors that I had the woman, cheated on her and forced an abortion. Yeah, he started lying to people about that and I had two.

[Caleb Hammer]

Who's this woman? Do you know?

[Philli]

No, he. He didn't even give a name of who it was. He said it was he. The people that he spread the rumor to. He just told it was a woman who didn't want to be named. I'm like, I haven't been with a woman in several months. Okay, okay, okay. But the guy was in the military and because of his whole infidelity thing because he was married at the time.

[Caleb Hammer]

Listen again, there is a lot because of where we were with me too, which was with good intentions. There's lots of weaponizing and lots of self victimhood, especially young Gen Z women. There's crazy and there's weaponization. It's. The Internet's gone off the rails but luckily no one takes them seriously anymore. Unfortunately, this hurts real victims. However, I would be on your side until a night a note just got typed to me and this is where

[Lindsay]

it's a little difficult and I'm starting to struggle because again, an influencer. Sure, I would expect that there's a

[Caleb Hammer]

thousand allegations against literally every influencer forever. Never hear about any of them because it's all stupid and it's All.

[Lindsay]

Nothing.

[Caleb Hammer]

That's just people getting upset and jealous that someone became famous.

[Philli]

Blah blah, blah blah blah.

[Caleb Hammer]

Or they want their 15 minutes, we get it.

[Lindsay]

But you're nothing. And that's not an offensive.

[Caleb Hammer]

Well it might be offensive, but it's not meant as a dig to you.

[Lindsay]

You don't have anything for anyone to latch on to.

[Caleb Hammer]

Yeah, that game doesn't work for you. And your ex accuse you of salting her daughter.

[Philli]

Yeah, well as a third thing, she's a very interesting person. So people believe that.

[Caleb Hammer]

So it's just like.

[Philli]

Well she's anything. Well she's psychotic and people believe that she killed my cat.

[Caleb Hammer]

Okay, I don't know what that has to do with.

[Philli]

Well she's crazy a lot.

[Caleb Hammer]

Well, people think she killed your cat.

[Philli]

You're not saying the details line up to where she probably did. Because I left my house at 6:00am for work. No, cat was in the bathroom. She Woke up at 9:15 allegedly found one of my cats dead in the bathroom.

[Caleb Hammer]

Uh huh. But there is a case open against. Here they are, they're pulling up.

[Philli]

Yeah, they're not for me, they're not for me. They're for her. She actually used to live in Texas right after.

[Caleb Hammer]

There's an open case against you.

[Philli]

No, not against me, against her. I have a case against her.

[Caleb Hammer]

Oh, okay. Thank you.

[Philli]

I have a case against her. No, this is.

[Caleb Hammer]

No, I can't again, it's really hard. If you were Brandon and Lindsay who are starting to get known or if you were any of my YouTuber friends, I'd be like, okay, I get it. This is welcome to just bullshit online. Nobody knows who you are. You're nothing.

[Philli]

Well, it's just.

[Caleb Hammer]

Why is. Why do these keep happening to you?

[Philli]

I. It's probably because I make terrible choices. And women specifically. About what you do to women. No, no, no. The women I pick are terrible choices apparently.

[Lindsay]

Like I'm addicted to this shit.

[Caleb Hammer]

I don't know, I can't explain it to you.

[Philli]

You're addicted to punching you in the face. No, I don't.

[Lindsay]

But the second one wasn't even a woman.

[Caleb Hammer]

You said there was a guy claiming

[Philli]

it was a guy just claiming that I did that to someone. The woman didn't even exist.

[Caleb Hammer]

Forced an abortion.

[Philli]

Yeah, but the guy was in the military and it came out have to do with anything because it came out that he was actually married at the time. That he was cheating on four other women as well as he was.

[Caleb Hammer]

So you're saying it was a revenge accusation?

[Philli]

Yes, because he was the one that was abusive to his now ex wife. So I think it was like a retaliation thing against me and like a bit of a.

[Lindsay]

Why has it happened three times to

[Caleb Hammer]

someone who nobody knows?

[Philli]

I don't know. Probably because I make bad decisions and who I associate with and if you

[Caleb Hammer]

were an actor, a musician, it would mean nothing to me and I would essentially believe your story that they're all. Because they usually are these days, unfortunately. But

[Philli]

I mean, it's. At the time, it was 2025. I mean, women. What women in 2025. A lot of them. Like. Like you said, a lot of people make up shit nowadays.

[Caleb Hammer]

They do, but usually not against things where they don't get anything like 15 minutes or bringing down someone's career or, you know, or a paycheck because there's a lot of hush money. I mean, yeah, stupid things that people do because it's an easy paycheck, but

[Philli]

there's also just psychotic people out there that don't care who they.

[Caleb Hammer]

But you got three.

[Philli]

Yeah.

[Caleb Hammer]

Islamophobic and.

[Philli]

No.

[Caleb Hammer]

And Kid Diddler.

[Philli]

No.

[Caleb Hammer]

Not stacking up well for you. Cat killer.

[Philli]

Well, my ex that accused me of things with her daughter. She. There's a lot of story to that. We were together for three months and in the. Yeah, in those three months, she allegedly killed my cat. She got me fired from two jobs.

[Caleb Hammer]

What?

[Philli]

Yeah.

[Lindsay]

How many jobs do you get again? Those are stacking up too. Why are you getting fired from so many jobs?

[Philli]

Well, that. I was intending on leaving those jobs. Cause I was starting at the company that I was at, like where I made 70,000 salary. I was starting at that company. So I was intending on leaving those jobs anyway. But because of the situation with her and her being so, like, I guess, violent in a way to where she would threaten people online, give them our address and show. And threatened them to show up to my house.

[Caleb Hammer]

And why the. Were you dating her for three months and not three seconds?

[Philli]

Well, it was shortly after that where I was like, all right, yeah.

[Caleb Hammer]

Was it that grippy?

[Philli]

No.

[Caleb Hammer]

What are you doing?

[Philli]

It probably. It was probably the last like whole month that I didn't. We didn't do anything because I was just.

[Lindsay]

You did for two months?

[Philli]

Yeah.

[Caleb Hammer]

With this crazy.

[Philli]

Hey, I was down bad. I was listening.

[Caleb Hammer]

Just because of where we are in our culture, I relatively am on your side and kind of believe you. Unless again, it's just like, unless that group chat is there. And like that story you told about how she backtracked isn't actually a thing that happened. Then all of a sudden you lose credibility. That's gonna be a hard time. But I rather. Based on our culture and all this shit we saw, we've seen online these past few years, where the new generation that grew up watching me too, and now they've weaponized it and they're crazy online. Reddit, TikTok, all that shit. It's like, I relatively believe you, but all it takes is one little thing and I'm done. And I'm done and I'm on their side.

[Philli]

Well, I've. I've had a lot of people, like, there's. There's a few people that I'm friends with. Okay, don't take it that way.

[Caleb Hammer]

A lot of people watch.

[Philli]

A lot of. A lot of people that I'm friends with on Tick Tock are known for, like, calling out these people who are abusers or stuff like that.

[Caleb Hammer]

And actually, like, yeah, it's because it's

[Philli]

literally hold legal, like, legal action against them and file a police report, stuff like that.

[Caleb Hammer]

No, cancellation is an economy.

[Philli]

They've looked into me all for all three allegations, and all three of them

[Caleb Hammer]

just called them your friends.

[Philli]

Well, yeah, because they're. They're still objective because it's legal matters that they hold people for and they've looked into me for in all three cases. And all three times have been like, yeah, this, like, nothing's happened. Like, this dude is good to go.

[Caleb Hammer]

So how long into your relationship with this woman that alleged you as a kitty diddler?

[Philli]

Right at the end. Right after we broke up.

[Lindsay]

Huh?

[Philli]

Right after we broke.

[Caleb Hammer]

How long into the relationship did she endlessly dump her baby on you while she went.

[Philli]

And other men, she was on FaceTime with them. I mean, she did cheat on me, like, at the very end, but that was, like, right before we broke up.

[Caleb Hammer]

It was the FaceTime with other men.

[Lindsay]

And why were you okay with that?

[Philli]

Well, because it was. It was a mutual friend of ours.

[Lindsay]

Lots of friends.

[Philli]

I know, I know. But it was probably the past, the last, like, three, four weeks that she. I would get home.

[Caleb Hammer]

Half the relationship close.

[Philli]

Yeah, it was a third, but it was the last, like, three, four weeks where I would get home from work, where I was working, like, 11, 12 hours, including drive time. And she would just be like, hey, can you take her? Like, I need time to relax. And she would just go upstairs into our bedroom, smoke weed, drink alcohol, and be on FaceTime with her.

[Caleb Hammer]

And again, you were not breaking up with her that day because.

[Philli]

So at that point, she had already had Scheduled a little, like, vacation to go see one of her girlfriends, and she was going with her daughter to go see her. So I'm like, all right. When that happens, she's taking all of her shit and getting out. Like, I was done at that point. And so she went. She got on a Greyhound and ended up going to Oklahoma to see one of her girlfriends and then ended up accusing the husband of the girlfriend of her. Okay.

[Caleb Hammer]

Yeah. Again weaponizing it. It's crazy. It's a bad time that we're in right now.

[Philli]

Yeah.

[Lindsay]

What is that? Not an allegation.

[Caleb Hammer]

What is 100% real is you are behind on your mortgage.

[Philli]

Yeah.

[Caleb Hammer]

Ain't no allegation.

[Philli]

Yeah. Yep, Yep. That is real. That is real. I was behind that old.

[Caleb Hammer]

Your mortgage.

[Philli]

How do you say so?

[Caleb Hammer]

I will talk about that in a second. But first, give me your Hammer Financial score.

[Philli]

Oh, God. I took the test, like four months ago and it's probably gotten worse since, so it's probably close to like a point. 75.

[Lindsay]

Okay.

[Caleb Hammer]

Rounded up to a one. If you want your Hammer Financial score,

[Lindsay]

see where you stand in the world

[Caleb Hammer]

of money by going to Caleb. Hammer.com just takes a few seconds or a few minutes to complete the quiz. It is free. See where you stand in the world of money, where you're doing poorly, what you need to do to improve, and where you're already doing pretty well. Make sure you download the Dollar wise app. It is the best budgeting app out there. New features being added every single month. It is absolutely incredible. It will. It'll take you away from all the pedo world that you might be trying to get yourself into. It'll save you. It'll also save your budget.

[Lindsay]

Dollarwise app.

[Caleb Hammer]

And all the way through the end of March. For those who sign up for the annual version, after the free trial, which is.

[Lindsay]

Take the free trial.

[Caleb Hammer]

See if you like it. Most people sign up for the annual version because it saves them about 50%.

[Lindsay]

You get my Budget Friendly Cookbook.

[Caleb Hammer]

There's no kitty pics in here. That's a good thing. I will sign it and I will mail it directly to you. Sorry, buddy. It's only pictures of food.

[Philli]

Well, I'm fat, so it's fine.

[Lindsay]

All right.

[Caleb Hammer]

So, yeah, the mortgage.

[Philli]

What? So to my credit, there was an issue with Huntington where, like, they have a feature called bill pay where it's

[Caleb Hammer]

their fault you missed your mark.

[Philli]

No, it's not all their fault. It was also my fault because I'm terrible with money. At the time, Huntington had issued what

[Caleb Hammer]

the ceasefire happened and you got real upset. Started not paying your bills.

[Philli]

Had to help a little bit. Where Huntington's bill pay feature essentially would take the money out of your account. They would write a check and mail it out to the institution that you send it to. But there was an issue where they wouldn't send the money. They wouldn't send the check, but it would still take the money out of my account. So I had that issue for a few months. Ended up getting that resolved. But that for the first month that caused me late on the payment. And then after that it was just. I was trying to play catch up. So I was catch up though.

[Lindsay]

You made so much money compared to

[Caleb Hammer]

what this mortgage payment is. Ketchup? Are you doing ketchup? You ketchup?

[Lindsay]

What are you talking about?

[Philli]

I just.

[Lindsay]

What are you talking about? Ketchup to anything? I. I had passed through 572. Dick.

[Caleb Hammer]

What's your normal mortgage payment when there's not late at.

[Philli]

It's like 579.

[Christian]

How are you passed on 579?

[Philli]

I. I don't know. I just. When the time comes for it to come out, it. It just. It just isn't there. I don't know.

[Lindsay]

579 is insane.

[Caleb Hammer]

What kind of mortgage is that low? What kind of mortgage is that low? I have.

[Lindsay]

I have never seen a mortgage that low. That is insane.

[Philli]

Yeah. I got very lucky with how I was worth the position I put myself in when I bought the house because I lived with my parents for like five years while working as an engineer to save up a dude.

[Caleb Hammer]

You've given privilege in every way whatsoever.

[Lindsay]

Yeah, every way whatsoever.

[Philli]

Yep.

[Caleb Hammer]

Not even a allegation takes you down. What are you.

[Lindsay]

And you're throwing it all away. This makes no sense.

[Philli]

Yeah, I need to. I need to stack them up.

[Lindsay]

You're like, well, the fourth one get me.

[Caleb Hammer]

I don't think so.

[Philli]

Well, I don't think it's also. It's not all my fault. Not every time. Because I mean, Huntington, Huntington, they took the money out of my account, but they never catch up.

[Caleb Hammer]

Ketchup makes no Sense.

[Philli]

In a 579 mortgage, $100 behind at

[Caleb Hammer]

one point you make $70,000 a year in a low cost of living area. That fifteen hundred dollars is a normal mortgage payment for most people.

[Philli]

Not in my area.

[Caleb Hammer]

Doesn't matter. With your income. Yes. You make well above the median household income for that area. Okay.

[Philli]

For my median household. For my people.

[Lindsay]

Of which you will never have.

[Philli]

Yeah, for my area. Yes. But I also. I also want to enjoy my life. I'm not going to just sit at home, do nothing all the time.

[Lindsay]

I know the playground's nearby, but you can sit at home. You said you're a homebody.

[Philli]

The playground's actually right behind my house

[Caleb Hammer]

because I live that.

[Lindsay]

While you're selling. It's a forced sale.

[Philli]

No, I live across the street from an elementary school.

[Caleb Hammer]

Got to get you closer to the retirement community.

[Philli]

Nope, that's on the south side of town. I'm on the west side.

[Caleb Hammer]

Huh? No, Florida.

[Philli]

Oh, where the olds live. Okay, well, no, because they don't live in Jacksonville. They're in Clearwater. Is that Clearwater?

[Caleb Hammer]

Dude, I don't know where that. I don't track old people. I'm not a. I'm not a dust chaser.

[Philli]

Okay, I'm not surprised.

[Caleb Hammer]

You should be able to catch up easy.

[Philli]

Well, my problem is I know what I'm doing. I just don't do it.

[Caleb Hammer]

What?

[Philli]

I know what I should.

[Caleb Hammer]

How does that make.

[Philli]

I know what I should be doing?

[Caleb Hammer]

Why the aren't you.

[Philli]

I just don't.

[Caleb Hammer]

That sounds great for a guy that has a lot of allegations. I know what I'm supposed to do, but I don't. I know what I'm not allowed to do, but I do it.

[Philli]

Let me rephrase. I know what I'm supposed to do with money.

[Caleb Hammer]

You tell yourself no constantly, and you do it anyway. Okay. All right.

[Philli]

That makes it sound so much worse than it is.

[Caleb Hammer]

Hey, you said it, not me. Yeah, no, I said it.

[Philli]

Yeah, you did. You did say you alleged it. I. I didn't.

[Lindsay]

Why aren't you doing.

[Caleb Hammer]

Dude, I just.

[Philli]

I'm.

[Lindsay]

If you know it.

[Caleb Hammer]

That makes no sense to me.

[Philli]

Well, I've been trying to change it.

[Caleb Hammer]

Oh, what the is your try? I don't do it. That's me trying.

[Philli]

I got a second job. I got a second job.

[Lindsay]

You've had a second job forever, and you get fired from all of them.

[Philli]

Okay, well, the firing wasn't my fault. That was my ex.

[Caleb Hammer]

Okay, well, you grab someone's old a woman to clean. You're a sexist. Peg.

[Philli]

You made the joke before I could even get the line out.

[Caleb Hammer]

So what is your trying? You're trying is you get a second job after getting fired from every single job ever in the history of everything ever since. You're only 27 years old.

[Philli]

Yeah.

[Caleb Hammer]

Crazy. This is not an income situation. No, you made $70,000, and you're.

[Lindsay]

You can't catch up on a 1500

[Caleb Hammer]

you know, a $579 a month payment on a 1500 past due balance on your mortgage. This is not an income situation.

[Philli]

It's not an income situation behavior.

[Lindsay]

So you working extra money to get extra money ain't helping.

[Christian]

That's not your problem.

[Philli]

It's. It's a. It's a me thing. It's a. It's a impulse thing.

[Caleb Hammer]

Yeah.

[Lindsay]

No. So don't say you're trying. By getting a second job.

[Philli]

That's trying to control it.

[Lindsay]

You. It's not doing anything. Plus, what are you even getting at the gas station?

[Philli]

Energy drinks? Snacks?

[Caleb Hammer]

What are you making?

[Philli]

What do you mean?

[Caleb Hammer]

You work there.

[Philli]

Oh, well, yeah, now I do. Now I do.

[Caleb Hammer]

Oh, he's. Oh, he's actually stupid.

[Lindsay]

Oh.

[Philli]

I've only been working there for about three weeks.

[Lindsay]

Oh, you.

[Caleb Hammer]

It doesn't matter, you dumbass. I. Oh, buddy.

[Philli]

Now, whenever. Whenever I'm drinking, you just talked about

[Caleb Hammer]

how you're making more money, so that's like your big thing. And I ask what you're getting, but

[Lindsay]

then you say, energy drinks. Oh, you're a piece of.

[Philli]

But now, whenever I work there.

[Caleb Hammer]

What's wrong with you?

[Philli]

But I don't eat as much as I used to. My appetite has gone way down.

[Lindsay]

Zampic.

[Philli]

No. Nope. I just forced. I just forced myself to shout out.

[Lindsay]

I know.

[Caleb Hammer]

Really do.

[Philli]

I wish I could.

[Caleb Hammer]

My needle phobia.

[Philli]

But I just.

[Caleb Hammer]

Why it would be. I'm phobic to needles. Why you? I'd pass out every time. What about you?

[Philli]

Well, I'm not phobic to it. I don't. I just don't like needles. But also, I just don't want to. I don't believe in, like, paying for something that I can do for free. Like, if I can. But if I can lose weight. Because Ozempic also isn't, like, a permanent thing. Because as soon as you get tattoos.

[Caleb Hammer]

Needle guy.

[Philli]

Yeah, I don't. That's. I mean, I'm not scared of needles. I just don't like the feeling of it sometimes.

[Caleb Hammer]

Okay, let's go to the next needle. Let's go to the next ad. If budgeting apps make you feel like this is for you.

[Lindsay]

Most people who struggle with budgeting aren't irresponsible. They care about their money, but they get overwhelmed every time they look at it. They download an app, connect their accounts, and try tracking. But within a few days, it feels like a homework assignment. They're failing. Too many categories, too many rules, too many red alerts screaming at them about

[Caleb Hammer]

what they did wrong. So of course they stopped opening it.

[Lindsay]

Not because they don't care, but because it makes them feel worse.

[Caleb Hammer]

And here's what nobody talks about.

[Lindsay]

The stress isn't coming from your spending. It's coming from having zero clarity in using tools that turn money into a failing grade. Have you ever thought I just want to know where my money going without being judged for it?

[Caleb Hammer]

You're not alone. That's exactly what we built dollar wise.

[Lindsay]

If you want a calm and clearer way to see where your money is going, try dollar wise. Download the app today and get a

[Caleb Hammer]

three day free trial.

[Lindsay]

No setup nightmare, no manual tracking, no pressure to be perfect.

[Caleb Hammer]

Just connect your accounts, see where your money's actually going and decide if it works for you.

[Lindsay]

Click below to download dollar wise and see if this helps you feel more in control without the the stress.

[Caleb Hammer]

And if it's not a fit, cancel anytime.

[Christian]

Starbucks is bull and a waste of

[Lindsay]

money and you already know that by making your coffee at home and invest in the rest.

[Christian]

So now you need to do that

[Lindsay]

with your energy drink as well. Make gamer subs at home for just 40 cents a serving.

[Caleb Hammer]

And honestly, it literally tastes better. And we proved this accidentally via a blind taste test in our Hammer Elite show Fat and Fatter. The number one ranked energy drink is gamer.

[Philli]

Literally. The cherry flavor is insane.

[Lindsay]

Listen, you can also get free samples to see if you like it or

[Caleb Hammer]

10% off your order at gamersupps gg

[Lindsay]

or click that link in the description below. Type in code. Caleb, there's a late charge on here too. What is home equity? Oh, is this what you're alluding to earlier?

[Philli]

Yeah.

[Lindsay]

What.

[Caleb Hammer]

What the is going on?

[Philli]

It's a heloc.

[Caleb Hammer]

Why?

[Philli]

I got. I got behind at one point.

[Lindsay]

What?

[Christian]

How?

[Lindsay]

It just makes no sense. You're in one of the most privileged

[Caleb Hammer]

positions anyone has ever been in on this show.

[Lindsay]

Well doesn't go to prison for given everything from their parents, incredible income in

[Caleb Hammer]

a no cost of living area.

[Philli]

Yeah.

[Caleb Hammer]

What are we doing?

[Philli]

Well, I just kind of made bad decisions and it those decisions were several, several thousands. Like buying motorcycles and random shit on Marketplace that I thought that would get

[Caleb Hammer]

the Asian baddies to want to be yours.

[Philli]

No, that was purely because I like motorcycles. My grandpa races so I wanted to kind of do something that he. I could look for that. Well, it wasn't just for that. It was also just for random shit.

[Lindsay]

I use it as kind of like a 33 593.95.

[Philli]

Yeah.

[Christian]

What is wrong with you?

[Philli]

A Lot, apparently.

[Lindsay]

That's insane.

[Caleb Hammer]

But it was interest rate of death.

[Philli]

Yeah.

[Caleb Hammer]

Of insanity.

[Lindsay]

Of you.

[Christian]

Of you.

[Philli]

The monthly payments are 1% of statement balance and then the interest is on top of it.

[Lindsay]

So you took this out of your house?

[Philli]

Yeah. That's.

[Lindsay]

Where did it all go? That's a shit ton of money.

[Philli]

Honestly, I couldn't tell you.

[Lindsay]

How long did you have it?

[Philli]

I've had it.

[Lindsay]

For how long did you have the

[Caleb Hammer]

money in hand that you took out?

[Philli]

It was probably over the course of like five, six months.

[Caleb Hammer]

I'm being told a month and a half. It was a leading question because I knew the answer and I knew he would say it wrong.

[Philli]

It might have been. It might have been that short.

[Guest Voice]

Want consistent color for every job? Milo's Pro Rewards members get a 20% paint discount on future purchases. After paint annual qualifying spend reaches $3,000 plus order eligible in stock paint and paint supplies by 2pm for free. Same day delivery by 8pm Improving is easy. At Lowe's. Exclude spray paint and mistints. More exclusions. Terms and conditions apply. Subject to change [e-mail] terms same day delivery valid and select zip codes subject to driver availability [e-mail] sameday delivery.

[Caleb Hammer]

Huh.

[Philli]

I. I could have swore it was a lot longer though, because like when I. Because I remember it was like a. They gave me like a little checkbook because they're. It's a dumb bank. They don't have cards for that yet. So they gave me a little checkbook that I had to use and I had to use that and deposit it into my account and then I could use the money for it. And I thought that it was over the span of like a decent amount of time because I thought it went into the springtime where I was using it, but it might not have been, but I thought it was.

[Lindsay]

You paid off a lot of debt

[Caleb Hammer]

with it and you wrecked it.

[Lindsay]

All right back up.

[Philli]

Yeah, I did.

[Lindsay]

We already have the story.

[Caleb Hammer]

And as they type it to me, I learn instead of you just being

[Lindsay]

able to tell me what is wrong with you, just tell me the answers.

[Philli]

Well, a lot of times I. There's been so much going on where it's like different. Different loans or different things or stuff like that. Where it's like my timelines get up because I just can't keep track of

[Caleb Hammer]

PC was one of them.

[Philli]

Yeah, it was.

[Caleb Hammer]

Sound bar of some kind.

[Philli]

It was a sound bar for the house.

[Caleb Hammer]

What are we doing, dude?

[Lindsay]

How long into the ownership of this

[Caleb Hammer]

house did you take the Sea lock out.

[Philli]

It was just about two and a half years.

[Caleb Hammer]

So this was like a year ago.

[Philli]

Yeah, it was October of 23 or October 24th. I mean.

[Caleb Hammer]

Yeah, 24.

[Philli]

Yeah. Or was it November? I don't remember which one though. It was the fall into the winter of 24 of when I took it out.

[Lindsay]

Chaos.

[Caleb Hammer]

Dude, what are you doing? Well, this. Interest rates. Oh, this minimum.

[Lindsay]

What is this?

[Caleb Hammer]

One main.

[Lindsay]

What did you do with one Main Financial.

[Philli]

Another attempt at consolidation?

[Caleb Hammer]

No. How many times have you done this by the age of 27. By 27 is not good. That is. Yeah, you are not a credit card person. You can use the fizz card, debit card that builds credit. I will never allow you to have debt in your life. You're a moron. You can't handle it to save your life.

[Philli]

The worst part is that it uses my truck as collateral.

[Caleb Hammer]

No, the worst part is the kid. The second worst part is the truck.

[Philli]

Okay, well, yeah, but that's. Yeah, it uses my truck as collateral. So I technically just bought the truck off of myself for that much. But now it's interest rate of death and.

[Caleb Hammer]

Yeah, 22.41%. Yeah, the is wrong with you, yo.

[Lindsay]

$25,876.95 on it.

[Philli]

Yep.

[Christian]

That's what is wrong with you.

[Philli]

I. I mean to my credit, $32.17

[Caleb Hammer]

a month more than your literal mortgage payment.

[Philli]

Yeah, to my credit though, I use that to pay off everything except for one motorcycle, which I'm taking matter, but I'm taking that to dealership.

[Caleb Hammer]

And also, this isn't paying off debt. This is 2.41% interest rate of high balance.

[Lindsay]

Dude, it's 50.

[Caleb Hammer]

The minimum payment is 50% higher than your mortgage payment. What is wrong with you?

[Philli]

Well, it's better than like the 30 some percent. A firm doesn't matter. It didn't change your behavior.

[Caleb Hammer]

And it is still a chunky minimum payment.

[Philli]

It is.

[Caleb Hammer]

What are you doing?

[Philli]

And I. And I was almost late on it.

[Caleb Hammer]

The first call with Lindsay. You were blaming your parents for enabling. You weren't taking any responsibility to save your life. Yeah, I know you.

[Philli]

They were enabling a little bit.

[Caleb Hammer]

I know your phone call. I didn't listen to them. But your phone calls right there. And she's typing it to me.

[Philli]

Yeah, they were enabling a little bit. Yeah.

[Caleb Hammer]

What?

[Philli]

Well, when I. So when I was living with them, they pretty much just like they wouldn't let me pay for anything. They wouldn't let me get on my own phone plan. They wouldn't let me get any groceries for myself. They wouldn't let me get my own insurance, all of that.

[Caleb Hammer]

For how long? Until what?

[Philli]

That was until I bought my house and moved out.

[Caleb Hammer]

When did you do that?

[Philli]

I was 23. I was 23.

[Caleb Hammer]

Okay.

[Philli]

So for five years.

[Lindsay]

23 is not like a crazy age

[Caleb Hammer]

to become independent for a lot of people.

[Philli]

I was an engineer for five years at that point, and I was making decent money at that point for five years. And they wouldn't let me do any. Any of that stuff to kind of like ease myself into getting.

[Caleb Hammer]

Yeah, but if you're excited to get a house, why aren't you not getting excited to be an adult and learn some basic shit on your own?

[Philli]

Well, when I. And then when I lived with them, well, people don't.

[Caleb Hammer]

You figure it out.

[Philli]

And then when I lived with them, I kind of could not use my debit card freely. I had to ask my dad permission to use it.

[Caleb Hammer]

That's weird.

[Philli]

And because of that, I kind of like, when I moved out, I was kind of like, oh, I have access to this money. I don't have to ask anybody for help. I can get the things that I want. And then it just kind of snowballed from there into what it is today. So it's kind of like partially them being so strict that it enabled my mentality when I moved out of, I can get what I want now, so I'm going to get it. And then I went overboard on it. And part of it is like, they didn't really teach me how to manage.

[Caleb Hammer]

You ever taken responsibility for anything in your entire life?

[Philli]

I can't.

[Caleb Hammer]

So the answer is no, then?

[Philli]

No, I do when it's my fault, because I take what has been your

[Caleb Hammer]

fault, because nothing's been your fault.

[Philli]

But, yeah, I bought it. I bought the truck off of my dad in December of 23.

[Caleb Hammer]

Okay.

[Philli]

And he. He sold it to me for probably like 10,000 under what it was worth.

[Caleb Hammer]

What? You've never had a struggle in your life, dude?

[Philli]

No, I haven't, but. And you're throwing it away. I created my own because I like to have things I like to have.

[Caleb Hammer]

Yeah, you do.

[Philli]

I like to have a good life. I like to enjoy my time.

[Caleb Hammer]

I don't know about like that.

[Lindsay]

Oh, so what came in?

[Philli]

What came in? So that was Lendmark. It's another lender.

[Caleb Hammer]

Well, that doesn't count as income coming in yet. Income coming in with 4600. What went out? What was your outflow?

[Philli]

Outflow was probably around 9,000 I'd imagine including the landmark.

[Lindsay]

You took Landmark out the day after

[Caleb Hammer]

you applied to come on the show.

[Philli]

Yeah.

[Caleb Hammer]

You can't do anything right.

[Philli]

Well, okay, I took. Yeah, that was. That was a lapse of judgment in the span. In a short time period. I actually applied to come on the show three times, and it was only the day after I got a competition

[Caleb Hammer]

to make it worse so you could come on.

[Philli]

I mean, I had to get your attention.

[Lindsay]

I've been making juke jokes, but maybe

[Caleb Hammer]

you should have been a Jew.

[Lindsay]

Your life would be 10 times better.

[Philli]

I had to get your attention.

[Caleb Hammer]

None of them make this mistake.

[Lindsay]

What was your outflow?

[Caleb Hammer]

Non Jew.

[Philli]

Including the landmark, I'd say probably close to like 9,000.

[Caleb Hammer]

Yeah, just about 8,300. So even including the landmark coming in, that brings your total income to $7,788. But outflow is still 8,346. So it was still 500 more.

[Philli]

I don't know where the other 500 would have been, because I don't have. Well, I don't use. I don't have credit cards that are, like, available balance, interest accruing.

[Caleb Hammer]

It's this your full outflow. Oh, well, maybe there was more money in your checking account at the beginning of the month than the end of the month. So more went out. You never know, buddy.

[Lindsay]

That's how it all goes.

[Caleb Hammer]

That's your net. We don't, you know, that's your. That's your net out. So whatever off you do on a credit card in terms of if you put money on it and actually makes progress, we don't consider that as an outflow. We don't count that as against you. Okay, but if more goes up on

[Lindsay]

a credit card than you put towards

[Caleb Hammer]

it, the net is still your net outflow.

[Philli]

Well, my credit cards have been almost maxed out for so long that I never really had an available balance.

[Caleb Hammer]

Okay, well, lend Mark.

[Philli]

Yep.

[Caleb Hammer]

So what. What. What is this again?

[Philli]

You know, landmark. It was just a personal loan because when I tried to sell my truck, I needed a down payment. Didn't have the money for it because.

[Caleb Hammer]

I see. What's the monthly payment? What's the balance?

[Philli]

3,000.

[Caleb Hammer]

No. No, it is not.

[Philli]

What's the balance on it?

[Caleb Hammer]

$4,931.42. Dude.

[Philli]

Why is that 4,000?

[Caleb Hammer]

Because you don't know your numbers. At $169.32. Payment was due a couple days ago.

[Philli]

Yes. Yep.

[Caleb Hammer]

So this was a down payment.

[Lindsay]

But that's such a tricky balance.

[Philli]

It Was.

[Caleb Hammer]

And you took this out right after you. The day after applying to come on the show.

[Philli]

Yeah. So actually, one thing that is kind of annoying, I went to.

[Caleb Hammer]

Oh, you're always late. Oh. Because they know you. You're okay with it.

[Philli]

Okay, well, what the.

[Caleb Hammer]

Is happening, dude, before we get into that part.

[Philli]

What a mess. I took it out because when I went to sell my truck, I have, like, roughly anywhere from 10 to 12,000 in negative equity. And anytime I tried to get a vehicle that had enough overhead on the sale price to value to cover that negative equity, it required me to put a few thousand down. And I didn't have that few thousand,

[Lindsay]

but this is five.

[Philli]

Well, when I. So I took out that personal loan, they got the money in my account. The next day, I went back to the dealership and said, because they already set me up with a car, told me a down payment, and it was all good. That's why I got that, like, that amount. And when I went back to the dealership the next day and said, hey, ready to do this trade in? The down payment doubled that they required, and I didn't have that. So how much was the truck. The truck value at that specific time? It was like. Well, the value that they were offering me was like 12, five,

[Caleb Hammer]

and you

[Lindsay]

had to put five down.

[Philli]

And they wanted me to put, like, four or five down. Yeah. And then the down payment doubled the next day without, like, it was the same lender that offered me the same one that approved me for.

[Caleb Hammer]

What is the interest rate on this?

[Philli]

I can't tell on that. It's probably like, 24, 20.

[Caleb Hammer]

Oh, my God.

[Lindsay]

Death.

[Philli]

Yeah.

[Caleb Hammer]

Landmark doesn't do anything if you can't get a car. If you have to finance the down

[Lindsay]

payment anyway, that's not a down payment.

[Philli]

Well, because loan. The. The value of the loan would have been like, home. Now I do. Yeah. Before. Before. At the time, I was driving over an hour, one way to get to work. I was driving 120 miles a day to get to and from the office.

[Caleb Hammer]

What was your vehicle situation?

[Philli]

My truck 16 miles before that.

[Lindsay]

What do you mean before you got this truck?

[Philli]

I've had this truck for two years. Before that, it was.

[Lindsay]

What the.

[Christian]

What is. Huh?

[Philli]

Yeah.

[Christian]

No, this.

[Caleb Hammer]

Oh, my goodness.

[Philli]

The car that I.

[Lindsay]

Are you sure that it's this loan and not a separate.

[Caleb Hammer]

Okay, buddy. I. I don't even. With. Do you even know what you're talking about? We've taken out five loans from them in the last few. Couple years.

[Philli]

Yeah, I have. For what? Just Miscellaneous things, dude. The one I used, all at this

[Caleb Hammer]

25% interest rate is insane, though.

[Philli]

Yeah, the one I. Or two of them. I used to buy motorcycles, which I then flipped. Didn't make anything. Ended up getting even on those, unfortunately. And then the other two or three were just. Just random shit.

[Lindsay]

A thought came to my mind. If this woman is actually crazy who

[Caleb Hammer]

alleged you as a pedo and she

[Lindsay]

has a child, would you not file

[Caleb Hammer]

claims with CPS and whatnot?

[Philli]

I have. Yeah. Myself and several of my friends and her former friends have all filed CPS claims. But since we broke up in June, she's been with four different men and moved to like three or four different states.

[Caleb Hammer]

She an addict?

[Philli]

No, she doesn't use.

[Caleb Hammer]

Is she bipolar?

[Philli]

Yeah, very, very.

[Lindsay]

Okay.

[Philli]

Yeah, she is very bipolar.

[Lindsay]

Oh, she called and asked you if you wanted to adopt the baby.

[Philli]

Yes.

[Caleb Hammer]

You just. You told me at the beginning you wanted a kid.

[Philli]

I want a natural. My own, like, biological.

[Caleb Hammer]

Natural.

[Philli]

K. A very rude way to say a biological kid. I want two or three biological.

[Caleb Hammer]

You literally could have saved the kid's life.

[Philli]

CPS and get. Got it. Got involved at the time and didn't take her.

[Caleb Hammer]

Yeah, but she asked you if you wanted to adopt.

[Philli]

She asked me. I wanted to. But I'm not saying you.

[Caleb Hammer]

You should be required to adopt because

[Lindsay]

you put in a hard situation, but

[Caleb Hammer]

maybe you could have fostered for a second.

[Philli]

I wanted to because, like, I end up getting really attached to that girl. To. To her. Okay. In a fatherly way. All right,

[Caleb Hammer]

you choose your own words. You said them.

[Philli]

I wanted to because I also know that my ex would not be able to give her a very good life at all.

[Lindsay]

Yes, that's what I'm saying.

[Philli]

And. But then when I really thought into it, I would have been essentially a single dad working over an hour away from home.

[Caleb Hammer]

Yeah, it's not perfect. Still, probably better.

[Philli]

I wouldn't have been able to afford the, like, the care for.

[Caleb Hammer]

That's a lie. You can. You're.

[Philli]

Well, the situation I was in at the time before I wasn't.

[Lindsay]

What was your situation? You also. Your parents would have helped.

[Philli]

No, my parents would not.

[Lindsay]

What do you mean? They help on everything.

[Philli]

No, they will not babysit kids.

[Caleb Hammer]

Not babysit.

[Lindsay]

But financially, I.

[Caleb Hammer]

If you were fostering temporarily for the sake of a kid's life, I'm not saying you should be morally forced to necessarily, but it's like they probably would

[Philli]

have helped, but I also don't like the idea of taking more from them than I have to because for the

[Caleb Hammer]

sake of the kids, like, it's hard. It's hard.

[Philli]

I. I want my parents to be able to have to not have to give me.

[Caleb Hammer]

I get it, I get it. I get it.

[Philli]

Also because my dad has a scarcity.

[Caleb Hammer]

And then my next follow up question. If we're with all these scares, these women that you were having sex with and having raw scares, were you literally coming inside of them raw?

[Philli]

No.

[Caleb Hammer]

Okay, so you're pulling out. Okay. At least you were doing that.

[Lindsay]

Okay.

[Caleb Hammer]

Okay.

[Philli]

I made every attempt I could to

[Caleb Hammer]

prevent condoms and birth control, but. Okay.

[Philli]

Well, most of them were.

[Caleb Hammer]

Safety's natural.

[Philli]

Actually, all of them are. Yeah. That's like one of the first things I ask before anything sexual happens is if they're on birth control.

[Caleb Hammer]

Just so it's like, oh, never trust the pill, though. You got to do the arm thing or the iud. I don't trust my crazy ex was

[Philli]

on the next one on the arm thing. And then the other one.

[Caleb Hammer]

That one's good.

[Philli]

The other one had the iud.

[Lindsay]

Good.

[Caleb Hammer]

That one's also good.

[Philli]

Yeah.

[Caleb Hammer]

Aren't things the best then? Iud, then pill.

[Philli]

I'm very conscious of all that. I'm terrified of having a kid too early with the wrong person.

[Caleb Hammer]

Yeah. Because the nose will destroy her vagina on the way out.

[Philli]

All right. I mean, maybe it's not that big.

[Lindsay]

So what is this?

[Caleb Hammer]

This looks like an affirm to me.

[Philli]

Yes. Okay. It is a firm.

[Caleb Hammer]

So what the are we doing? Art is fast. Amazon Foundation Disc golf.

[Lindsay]

TikTok Shop.

[Christian]

TikTok Shop Wheel adapters.

[Lindsay]

What are you adapting wheels. The are you will adapt in your little shit.

[Philli]

That was for my truck.

[Lindsay]

Oh, you Amazon. Amazon. You owe 25% interest rate of loan of death. You will adapters. Amazon Motorsports, Amazon TikTok. Oh, what is the total balance?

[Philli]

I think the total balance was like just shy of 3,000.

[Caleb Hammer]

Okay, yeah, sure. But you got it down to 1374, which is still crazy. I'm going to assume the minimum payment is like 200.

[Christian]

What?

[Lindsay]

Okay, pull up your Amazon for me.

[Caleb Hammer]

Affirming Amazon. Dumb tit.

[Lindsay]

Listen, you'd be getting 5% on the Amazon card.

[Christian]

What are you doing?

[Lindsay]

And the TikTok Shop.

[Caleb Hammer]

I got to see it all. Just I don't want to see your photos folder.

[Lindsay]

Arm twisting workout.

[Caleb Hammer]

Dude, you're buying things every five seconds of life.

[Lindsay]

Cat food.

[Caleb Hammer]

That's obviously okay.

[Lindsay]

Crush hunt two point traditional. What do you alkaline dodge ram something. Front brake rotors.

[Caleb Hammer]

I mean, that's probably fine.

[Lindsay]

48 inch outdoor firepower.

[Caleb Hammer]

You don't need that to survive.

[Lindsay]

Toilet paper.

[Caleb Hammer]

That's probably.

[Philli]

Yeah.

[Lindsay]

Two Ploy. Ply.

[Caleb Hammer]

What's a good ply? What's a good ply? Huh? Huh? Like Charmin Ultrasoft.

[Philli]

Yeah.

[Caleb Hammer]

Yeah. Two good enough. Well, two scares.

[Philli]

Well, one ply is the shit that you see in, like, bathrooms and public.

[Caleb Hammer]

And you only want to do twice as good as that. It's what? Charman Ultrasoft. Do we know how many plies?

[Philli]

I think it's three.

[Caleb Hammer]

That's what you got to do. And I will accept nothing less.

[Philli]

It's more expensive. It's so much more expensive.

[Caleb Hammer]

No, no, no. There is almost nothing more worth putting actual money to than good toilet paper and a bidet.

[Philli]

So.

[Caleb Hammer]

Okay, so some cat things.

[Philli]

A lot of the Amazon camping stool.

[Christian]

Little knives.

[Philli]

Those are returned.

[Caleb Hammer]

Yeah, that one. A return has been started.

[Philli]

I don't even remember the cosplay outfit. That one.

[Lindsay]

Oh.

[Caleb Hammer]

So that you can get your little Asian goon girls to finally want you.

[Philli]

It was supposed to be for not enough money.

[Caleb Hammer]

Did it? Now you got a cosplay.

[Philli]

It was supposed to be for a TikTok with a friend.

[Caleb Hammer]

Mm. Supposed to be. And then it got delivered. Nothing happened.

[Philli]

The knives? I think I ordered those when I was drunk.

[Christian]

In your cart.

[Philli]

I keep working out.

[Lindsay]

Laser invisible gun. Dude, you look like you're about to

[Caleb Hammer]

do a school shooting.

[Lindsay]

And now this is lining up.

[Philli]

I keep stuff in my car.

[Caleb Hammer]

Elementary schools in your backyard.

[Lindsay]

Watch out.

[Philli]

Oh, my God.

[Lindsay]

Right?

[Philli]

No. I keep it in my car if it's something cool. That would be holsters.

[Lindsay]

You got mag bags and you got laser pointers.

[Caleb Hammer]

I'm nervous.

[Philli]

I have a lot of friends that do that, do cosplay. And they ask me to like.

[Caleb Hammer]

And how old are they?

[Philli]

They're my age or a little bit older. They do cosplay for content. So I sometimes.

[Caleb Hammer]

Why I need to be able to Glock lock with all extra magazine holders.

[Philli]

Okay. Well, that's a perfect.

[Caleb Hammer]

To never let this man in the office again. You terrify me.

[Philli]

You.

[Caleb Hammer]

You want to dress nice. You're getting a lot of nice. Oh, you got a. He has a flashing. Flashing trench coat.

[Philli]

So that was.

[Lindsay]

Oh, with the elementary school and everything.

[Caleb Hammer]

This is crazy.

[Philli]

That was because of.

[Lindsay]

What are you doing?

[Caleb Hammer]

There's. Oh, what a freak.

[Philli]

That was because of the whole, like, esthetic of, like, Peaky Blinders. Me and my friends were going to do a video about it.

[Caleb Hammer]

Huh?

[Philli]

Peaky Blinders. You know how they dress.

[Caleb Hammer]

Are you trying to give. Are you trying to get the kids on the playground a little?

[Philli]

No, it was a video trend of people dressing like peaky Blinders going out in public.

[Caleb Hammer]

Yeah, I don't want you to be getting pickies in public.

[Philli]

Oh my gosh. I'm not going to be doing this. Are you having trouble getting to shop?

[Lindsay]

Listen, I'm not a who buys things on TikTok shop.

[Philli]

I haven't bought anything on TikTok shop

[Caleb Hammer]

and it was on this statement.

[Philli]

Then I probably did.

[Caleb Hammer]

Okay, orders. There it is.

[Philli]

There's a lot of random.

[Caleb Hammer]

It wasn't placed on here. Yeah, maybe a different account perhaps.

[Lindsay]

Well, why is there a TikTok shop

[Caleb Hammer]

that you literally financed?

[Philli]

Oh, because I bought. I bought ramps for my truck. That way I could put the front wheels up and get underneath it easier. I'm a little too fat for getting underneath it.

[Lindsay]

And what is this?

[Caleb Hammer]

Pay Later Affirm Klarna. That's PayPal Karma.

[Philli]

Yeah, it's PayPal. I wasn't able to screenshot it because when you screenshot PayPal it goes to a black.

[Caleb Hammer]

So what the are you doing? Mini katana.

[Philli]

And I bought a katana. It was for the cosplay. For my friend or with my friend?

[Caleb Hammer]

Stop your cosplay.

[Philli]

Weird shit, dude.

[Caleb Hammer]

You can't afford a life. And Lily J. Duan. Lily J. Duan.

[Philli]

That one. It's from ebay. They're plastics for a motorcycle. Because a year and a half ago, maybe a year ago, I hit a deer on my bike and I needed to replace the plastics to be able to sell it. So I bought them and I put them on. And that's what that is.

[Caleb Hammer]

It looks like the accountant looped that into your firm. So we'll leave the balance and minimum payment, it says. But that's insane. Oh, and then PayPal credit.

[Philli]

Yeah, you're not gonna like it.

[Caleb Hammer]

You're addicted.

[Philli]

You're not gonna like it.

[Lindsay]

I don't like any of this.

[Caleb Hammer]

What?

[Philli]

That one I did negotiate with them, closed the account and it's on a strict 0% flat rate monthly.

[Caleb Hammer]

Then why are you past due?

[Philli]

I don't know.

[Lindsay]

If you want to land a high

[Caleb Hammer]

paying job but don't have experience or a degree, then you need to learn about course careers. It is the easiest way to land the high paying career that you've been dreaming of. I've done financial audits for hundreds of people and what I've learned is that

[Lindsay]

the single biggest factor someone can take

[Caleb Hammer]

to improve their life is getting a higher paying job. And that is why I'VE been such

[Lindsay]

a huge huge promoter and even an investor in course careers.

[Caleb Hammer]

The way it works is you simply go through an affordable online course to start a new high paying career path.

[Lindsay]

They teach many different in demand jobs

[Caleb Hammer]

ranging from technology, sales to accounting, construction,

[Lindsay]

project management, the trades like electrician, plumbing, H Vac, supply chain and many others

[Caleb Hammer]

that can be done remotely. And the coolest part about course careers is their platform works for people who don't have any previous experience or degrees.

[Lindsay]

Their courses teach you everything you need to know to land your first entry level job. And they have a 100% free introductory course for each career that teaches you

[Caleb Hammer]

all about what the job is like,

[Lindsay]

how much money you'd make and how

[Caleb Hammer]

exactly to land your first job was starting from scratch. Click the link below to sign up for one of their free courses today.

[Lindsay]

I am so excited for you guys to finally get your hands on what I've been working on for a year.

[Caleb Hammer]

The brand new dollar wise budgeting app.

[Lindsay]

And listen, I get it, the first iteration was a disaster.

[Caleb Hammer]

Many reasons from working with an external agency to shit infrastructure that I could use. But let's be honest, that was on me.

[Lindsay]

So I put my money where my

[Caleb Hammer]

mouth is and after investing millions of

[Lindsay]

dollars and hiring dozens of people, we've completely rebuilt dollar wise and it is truly incredible. And to celebrate I am giving you some insane deals to sign up for the first time or trying it again after you used the shitty version last year. But these deals only last through March

[Caleb Hammer]

31st and then they're on forever.

[Lindsay]

Download now, take your free trial to test it out and get the monthly plan at a 33% discount for three months or take the annual plan for

[Christian]

an insane 50% discount.

[Lindsay]

And with the annual you get my budget friendly cookbook signed by me and

[Christian]

my brand new 30 day detailed budget

[Lindsay]

meal plan signed by me as well. Both of them mailed directly to you. But after March 31st the cookbook is gone forever. So this is literally your last chance to get it. And if you're feeling extra sexy, become one of the founder 500 purchasers to get my Founder Wonder box featuring a bunch of goodies plus lifetime access to the premium version of Dollar Wise.

[Caleb Hammer]

Don't miss this opportunity of a lifetime.

[Lindsay]

Download Dollar Wise and start your free trial.

[Caleb Hammer]

Go to Dollarwise.com or click those links below.

[Philli]

I don't know why because I. I set up auto pay on it and then forget about it and then autopay.

[Christian]

No you didn't. Or you don't have enough money in

[Lindsay]

Your checking account and you get return.

[Caleb Hammer]

It's maxed out you $5,309.48.

[Christian]

What are you doing?

[Philli]

Buying random.

[Lindsay]

Just quiet now.

[Caleb Hammer]

Quiet now, you child. 196 is your minimum to payment. Well, pastor is probably like normally a hundred dollars.

[Philli]

It's 99 now, flat rate.

[Christian]

But you owe 200 because you're dumped

[Lindsay]

it because all your past due interest. Hundreds of dollars. You've had late fees up the dick this year. You're late constantly. Dude, what are you doing?

[Philli]

When I set up auto pay, sometimes it just it. When I go back to it the next month after I see the late fee, it says auto pay was never set up.

[Lindsay]

I know what you did. What you do. What was half this balance?

[Caleb Hammer]

A quarter of this balance.

[Lindsay]

I mean, third of this balance. What was it you told Lindsay Better not lie now.

[Philli]

A lot of it was DoorDash. Yeah.

[Caleb Hammer]

Almost 2000 bucks a DoorDash in a singular month.

[Philli]

There was a phase. Okay, okay, hold on. To my credit, I had three surgeries in the span of about 14 months. And they're on my tailbone.

[Lindsay]

Why wasn't any of them rhinoplasty?

[Philli]

Okay. No, I have a deviated septum, so I gotta fix that sometime too. So I might have to do the rhinoplasty at the same time, you know, just to appease you. I had three. I had three surgeries on my tailbone a span of about 14, 15 months. And because of that pilonidal cyst, it's basically. You had a guest here the one time that actually talked about it and it kind of pissed me off because he described it wrong.

[Caleb Hammer]

I guessed it.

[Philli]

Yeah, that. It's essentially.

[Caleb Hammer]

Take that you sister.

[Philli]

Well, it was. It was that one gay guy who was like cheating on homophobic. No, he was. It was the one where he. No, it was the one where he was like cheating on his man with his roommate and all that, like, you know what I'm talking about.

[Caleb Hammer]

And does that disgust you?

[Philli]

No, not at all. I don't care.

[Caleb Hammer]

Well, cheating.

[Philli]

Cheating does. Yes, but like, she's pro cheating.

[Caleb Hammer]

No, this guy is an absolute.

[Philli]

You misled madness led me on that.

[Lindsay]

This guy is.

[Philli]

You misled me on that one.

[Caleb Hammer]

Oh, I have fun. This is a fun show.

[Philli]

A pineal assist is essentially where like the bacteria will burrow little tunnels into the muscle tissue.

[Caleb Hammer]

Clean your hole, you freak.

[Philli]

It's. It's an like I do. It's something that you do that. No, you're weird.

[Caleb Hammer]

The bacteria supposed to do that.

[Philli]

It's A bacteria that's there from birth, and then it eventually. Like, no matter what it's from, like,

[Caleb Hammer]

he presses your mom's couch.

[Philli]

It's not. No, it's not that. No.

[Caleb Hammer]

What you're born with up your asshole.

[Philli]

No, it's a. It's not that kind of bacteria. It's just a regular bacteria in the human body. But sometimes with, like, if you sit for long periods of time, like I do for work.

[Sponsor Voice]

This episode is brought to you by Indeed. Stop waiting around for the perfect candidate. Instead, use Indeed sponsored jobs to find the right people with the right skills fast. It's a simple way to make sure your listing is the first candidate. C. According to Indeed data, sponsored jobs have four times more applicants than non sponsored jobs. So go build your dream team today with Indeed. Get a $75 sponsored job credit@ Indeed.com podcast. Terms and conditions apply.

[Philli]

It can create some, like, heat and pressure, and then if there's friction, like, between butt cheeks, it starts to burrow into the muscle tissue.

[Caleb Hammer]

So what does it create?

[Philli]

It just creates, like, a pocket in muscle tissue. Like. Like, kind of like where. Mostly on your tailbone.

[Caleb Hammer]

Like, right on your tailbone.

[Philli]

In the muscle tissue above your tailbone.

[Lindsay]

Does it hurt?

[Philli]

Yes.

[Caleb Hammer]

And three surgeries are required. Why?

[Philli]

Because the first one, they took, like, I want to say like, 14 pounds of muscle tissue away. Oh, good. To clear out.

[Caleb Hammer]

Yeah.

[Philli]

They had to clear out a lot. And then £14.

[Caleb Hammer]

You sure?

[Philli]

Yeah, yeah. She actually. She actually showed me the actual piece of meat she took out and put it on a scale right in front of me.

[Caleb Hammer]

I'm like, I don't like your needs, but.

[Philli]

Well, okay. Well. And then it came back, like, seven, eight months later. It was much smaller. So it was just. That was more so just like,

[Caleb Hammer]

they

[Philli]

didn't get the whole thing. Yeah. So I had to have that done three times. And because of that, I wasn't able to move around. I wasn't able to drive as much.

[Caleb Hammer]

So you doordash.

[Philli]

So I doordashed.

[Lindsay]

But even.

[Caleb Hammer]

Even just getting groceries delivered and making food is so cheaper. Well, is so expensive.

[Philli]

Getting groceries delivered wasn't an option in my town until the past, like, six or seven months.

[Caleb Hammer]

Because you live where no one.

[Philli]

It's a town of, like, three or four thousand people.

[Caleb Hammer]

Because you live where no one should live.

[Philli]

Well, the town I grew up in, where my parents live, is a village

[Caleb Hammer]

town where no one should live.

[Philli]

A thousand people.

[Caleb Hammer]

So I love living in places with no opportunities.

[Philli]

Well, that's why I drove over an hour to work one way because I

[Caleb Hammer]

would drive to Columbus and problem quicksilver.

[Philli]

Yes.

[Caleb Hammer]

185. This one's not as bad. Yep, that's a got interest accruing $185.14.

[Lindsay]

But you did purchase on a card

[Caleb Hammer]

that is accruing interest that you're not fully paying off.

[Lindsay]

I just don't understand why not pay it fully off?

[Caleb Hammer]

Like you're not 180. $85.14 with a minimum monthly payment at $25. It's like yeah, you're just making your minimum payment and then you're purchasing 83.

[Lindsay]

54.

[Caleb Hammer]

What is wrong with you?

[Lindsay]

And it's at your gas station, asshole.

[Philli]

It's dude, make this shit. Make this shit and take it to

[Caleb Hammer]

work you dumb titles with you gamer subs. These are their free packets. You can get the free packets of GameRupps GG link in the description below. Use code Caleb for the free samples. See what flavor you like. And then it is 40 cents a serving when you make it. Dude, stop this. $8.48 stop this.

[Philli]

I actually have gamer subs at home.

[Lindsay]

Good, isn't it?

[Caleb Hammer]

So good.

[Philli]

I use it for my pre workout.

[Caleb Hammer]

Isn't it great?

[Philli]

It's amazing. It's amazing. Guacamole. Guacamole. Gamer fart 9000.

[Caleb Hammer]

Yeah, the names are weird but so delicious.

[Philli]

Yes.

[Caleb Hammer]

Then why are you purchasing at a gas station that you work at? You dumb tip.

[Philli]

Probably snacks.

[Lindsay]

It's so easy to make the gamer subs. 40. 40 cents a serve.

[Philli]

Yep.

[Christian]

I don't drink Steam games.

[Philli]

That one was an accident I went to.

[Caleb Hammer]

I always accidentally purchased things on Steam.

[Philli]

It was. My Steam was connected to my PayPal and it. For some reason it was using my Quicksilver as a default card.

[Caleb Hammer]

Even though nowhere else purchase regardless if you can't afford anything.

[Philli]

I was buying a game. I was buying.

[Caleb Hammer]

Yeah, and you shouldn't have. You definitely shouldn't have. Yeah, I really suck.

[Philli]

Black Ops 7 is the worst Call of Duty they've ever made.

[Caleb Hammer]

Exactly. And that's honestly kind of hard because there's been lots of shit ones recently. Yeah.

[Philli]

Yeah, there's. This one's horrible. It's. It's a fever dream.

[Caleb Hammer]

And it is not easy to purchase on Steam. Friction. I'll be honest.

[Philli]

Yeah, I was gonna. I was gonna try to return it when I realized that it was on the Quicksilver card. Plus I realized it was a game but it was already past the two hour play time period that Steam has for returns. So I was at like two and a half hours of play time, so I couldn't return it.

[Caleb Hammer]

Venture one, $487.37.

[Philli]

Yep.

[Caleb Hammer]

With a minimum monthly payment of 25 bucks.

[Philli]

500 limit.

[Christian]

Yeah.

[Lindsay]

And you purchased $729.

[Philli]

How did I purchase.

[Caleb Hammer]

What is wrong with you? How did I purchase it? What do you mean? Swiped like a dumb piece of. What do you mean, how did I purchase.

[Lindsay]

How about this many purchases?

[Caleb Hammer]

Top down. Cam, nice to see you.

[Lindsay]

Look at this. This is crazy.

[Philli]

That's a new one to me.

[Caleb Hammer]

What? No, it is not. This is what you are doing.

[Philli]

I don't remember swiping that much.

[Lindsay]

Are you so dumb?

[Caleb Hammer]

How are you. What are you talking about?

[Philli]

I don't remember swiping that much on that card at all.

[Lindsay]

You got some energy drinks or snacks? Energy drinks or snacks? You went in, you ate at Marysville. Wingstop. Energy drinks or snacks? Taco Bell, McDonald's, Subway. Energy drinks or snacks? Energy drinks or snacks?

[Christian]

Energy drinks or snacks?

[Lindsay]

Air tire. Air tire. That's fine. Energy drinks or snacks? Harbor Freight Tools.

[Caleb Hammer]

Two bucks, though. You probably just got a snack on your way out.

[Philli]

No. Yeah, you did.

[Caleb Hammer]

No, no.

[Philli]

Harbor Freight doesn't have snacks.

[Caleb Hammer]

You did something. You got like a drink or something you had to have. Because you went there and you purchased 44.99. And on your way out, you grabbed something for 207.

[Philli]

Harbor Freight doesn't have snacks.

[Caleb Hammer]

You grab something for 207 after.

[Philli]

Probably zip ties. Probably zip ties. Because. Because I buy zip ties all the time. Because I use them all the time. So that's probably what it was. The two dollar something. The 44 something was probably like a ratchet or sockets or something. And then the $2 something was probably zip ties.

[Caleb Hammer]

It was probably also drinks or snacks. Energy drinks or snacks. Five guys. Energy drinks or snacks. Wendy's. Energy drinks or snacks? Taco Bell. Wendy's. Energy drinks or snacks?

[Lindsay]

A park.

[Philli]

Park.

[Caleb Hammer]

Yeah. You go to parks?

[Philli]

And which one's that?

[Caleb Hammer]

Wait, I don't know.

[Philli]

I don't know what it is.

[Caleb Hammer]

Sportsman's store. Wink Stop.

[Philli]

Oh, a Sportsman stop is a gun store, Right.

[Caleb Hammer]

Elementary school. Watch out. This is. What are you doing?

[Philli]

It's for hunting. I hunt deer.

[Caleb Hammer]

Hunting what?

[Philli]

Deer. Whitetail deer. Because I use it for.

[Caleb Hammer]

Go for the white ones.

[Philli]

I use it for meat during the winter. Ground beef. It's basically ground beef.

[Caleb Hammer]

But it's not. It's ground deer.

[Philli]

No, but it's a lot cheaper than buying the same amount of ground beef.

[Caleb Hammer]

Massillon. Massillon. Great eagle. Great Eagle. Giant Eagle. Is that a casino? Giant Eagle Casino. Right.

[Philli]

I don't go to Giant Eagle. I don't have one within like an hour and a half of me.

[Caleb Hammer]

Okay, well. Giant Eagle. Giant Eagle. Okay.

[Philli]

Chick fil A Giant.

[Caleb Hammer]

Energy drinks or snacks? Energy drinks or snacks.

[Philli]

How much will this giant Take a look? I think Giant. I think sometimes the Walmart in my town shows up as Giant Eagle because they're affiliated companies. Because I notice on previous statements Walmart. Yeah, I noticed on previous statements Giant Eagles or some of my Walmart purchases come up as Giant Eagle. I don't. And I never knew why.

[Caleb Hammer]

You just opened a new credit card from Bass Pro Shop.

[Philli]

That one. I only opened it. I only opened it because I wanted to increase my. My unused debt. I don't use that card. It stays locked. It stays for now. No, I don't plan on using that

[Caleb Hammer]

at all for now. Look at your behavior. Look at what you've done with the last two times you consolidated. Dude, I don't believe you for a single second. To be able to manage that zero balance for now. Sepp Field.

[Philli]

Yes. That's for the motorcycle that I'm going to be in. I'm going to be taking it to a dealership.

[Caleb Hammer]

16% interest rate.

[Philli]

I'm going to be taking it to a dealership to sell it. Right? Sure.

[Caleb Hammer]

What's the value?

[Philli]

Probably close to 6,000.

[Caleb Hammer]

Well, you know, $7,517.09 at a 16% interest rate with a minimum monthly payment of $258.86. So you're not selling this and paying it fully off.

[Philli]

I think that monthly payment has a late fee in it.

[Caleb Hammer]

Oh my goodness.

[Philli]

Because it's normally like 2:30.

[Caleb Hammer]

Goodness. I don't know what to do with you.

[Philli]

Yeah, the monthly payment is normally like 230, I think.

[Caleb Hammer]

Why can't you pay anything? What's wrong with you? Yeah, late fee.

[Philli]

Yeah, well, there was also a time where I was locked out of that account and I wasn't able to access it and I had to call.

[Lindsay]

Everything is everyone else's fault.

[Philli]

I'm just saying. I'm not saying it's not my fault. I probably went to like log into it and then failed the password too many times and locked the account.

[Caleb Hammer]

Dumbass. Dude.

[Lindsay]

Okay, well, your checking account is 553. Oh, sezzle wing. Stop. Oh my.

[Philli]

Anything on. Sezzle is an online gun store. What is wrong with you, freak? Sezzle is what they use for like their after.

[Lindsay]

Stop it. Stop being such a weirdo.

[Caleb Hammer]

Stop being such a freak weirdo, you freak weirdo.

[Philli]

I use it for hunting.

[Christian]

What is wrong with you?

[Lindsay]

Freak weirdo.

[Philli]

I use it to get things for hunting season.

[Caleb Hammer]

Freak weirdo. Oh, energy drinker snacks. Art is fast.

[Philli]

Art is fast. He's like, real short. Art is fast. As a content creator, I actually bought. I just bought a sweatshirt from him. That's all I was.

[Caleb Hammer]

Dude, you're late on shit, including your mortgage, your sweatshirt. Real short. Amazon Riot Games.

[Philli]

Yeah, that was a bad decision. Valorant. I was spending money on Valorant in game.

[Caleb Hammer]

Oh, you animal. You beast. PayPal paying for.

[Philli]

Yep.

[Caleb Hammer]

I think it might be Hammer Elite.

[Lindsay]

I don't know.

[Philli]

Yeah, I do have Hammer Elite.

[Caleb Hammer]

Well, at least it's more value than his sweatshirt, which is Hammer Elite. Cause we've got three premium shows posted every single day, six days a week.

[Philli]

I watch it all the time.

[Caleb Hammer]

Isn't it great?

[Philli]

It's fantastic.

[Lindsay]

It's incredible.

[Philli]

Yeah, I watch more than one episode per day on et cetera.

[Caleb Hammer]

See, people who haven't subscribed, and they see it, they're always like, you should do quality over, over quantity. Dude, we got the quantity and we got the quality. That's why my team costs hundreds of thousands of dollars.

[Philli]

I put all of the. It's so I put all the CHL vods into a playlist, and I just have that playing on my TV while I fall asleep.

[Caleb Hammer]

He's a hero. We love him. Except for the diddling.

[Philli]

Okay,

[Lindsay]

Nitro disc. You pay for Discord.

[Philli]

That one. I ended up getting refunded after the fact because it was for an account that got banned.

[Caleb Hammer]

McDonald's Sportsman's.

[Lindsay]

Again? Yep.

[Caleb Hammer]

Snacks and.

[Lindsay]

Or energy drink.

[Caleb Hammer]

Venmoing out money to our Asian.

[Philli]

Okay, friends, if it's veno, it's probably to one of my friends for, like, paying her for doing stuff for me. Okay. She. She crochets. She made two. Two of my cats sweaters, so I paid.

[Lindsay]

Oh, energy drinker snacks.

[Caleb Hammer]

Wendy's, Domino's. Did you go out to eat every second of your life? This is crazy. Panda restaurants. Hulu Sezzle. Energy drinks or snacks? PayPal Sezzle. Sezzle energy drinks or snacks. Steam.

[Lindsay]

Purchase again.

[Caleb Hammer]

47.73. So many in one month. Dude, I buy, like, I feel I buy a game maybe once a quarter at the max. I don't buy very many.

[Philli]

I think that was a game that was normally like 80 bucks, but it was on sale, so I bought it.

[Caleb Hammer]

Bronson Automotive. Spotify. If you have YouTube Premium, why have Spotify?

[Philli]

I had to cancel Spotify because YouTube

[Caleb Hammer]

music is great too. McDonald's. Oh, my goodness. Energy drinks or snacks. Sezzle. Kindle Unlimited.

[Philli]

I'm not giving up Kindle Unlimited. I read way too much on it. It's so much nicer to have than physical books sometimes.

[Lindsay]

Taco Bell.

[Caleb Hammer]

Sezzle. Energy drinks or snacks. You went inside and purchased something. I don't even know. Cash app to our Asian titties. Doordash and Wendy's. Energy drinks or snacks. Amazon Prime. It keeps going. Oh, my. What is wrong with you? Sezzle. Cabela's sheets. Energy drinks or snacks. Wingstop. You rented something on. On here.

[Philli]

Something. Yeah. Is it labeled as something?

[Caleb Hammer]

Or maybe that's premium, but usually it would say Crunchyroll.

[Lindsay]

Energy drinks or snacks. Cash apping for Asian buttholes that they post on Twitter.

[Caleb Hammer]

Doordash and Wendy's.

[Lindsay]

Energy drinks or snacks. Artist. Fast. Chipotle Dominoes Foundation.

[Philli]

Yeah, it's another PlayStation Network.

[Caleb Hammer]

Oh, my.

[Philli]

Dude, PlayStation Network. I didn't even know I had that.

[Caleb Hammer]

Well, you do now.

[Lindsay]

Taco Bell.

[Christian]

Paying for Klarna. PayPal. PayPal sizzle.

[Philli]

I'm dying if it's PayPal. Probably the Taco Bell.

[Lindsay]

Wingstop. Real short again. KFC Energy Drinks or snacks says.

[Philli]

Oh, real short is just a little, like, stupid app where you can watch, like, stop yourself.

[Caleb Hammer]

Oh, my goodness. I have never seen anything like this in my life.

[Philli]

What?

[Caleb Hammer]

This is financial auto history in one month. 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7,

[Christian]

8, 9, 10, 10 overdraft fees in one month. $150 15 bucks a payoff. Not only.

[Lindsay]

Shut your ass up, you pedo.

[Caleb Hammer]

Not really. Allegedly. Kind of. Actually, technically it was allegedly, but probably not, because she does sound crazy.

[Christian]

You've had 117 overdraft fees this year. Last year, 20, 25, 117. What are you. What are you.

[Lindsay]

What have you done to your life? This makes no sense.

[Christian]

And you send money to Asians? Oh, why?

[Philli]

Does it make it better? No.

[Lindsay]

Nothing you say will make it better.

[Christian]

You are broken. You are ruined. You are a.

[Philli]

Does it make it worse if I say that I actually have overdraft protection, too? So if my checking account goes to the negative, it pulls from my savings.

[Lindsay]

Yeah, that's telling me a lot of

[Caleb Hammer]

where your savings is about to be. Yeah, it's negative $97.99.

[Christian]

Oh, my. In here alone. In here alone. PayPal affirm. PayPal affirm. Affirm, affirm, affirm, affirm, affirm. I'm going this separate account in this

[Lindsay]

separate stupid ass, dumbass, horrible account.

[Christian]

You've had

[Lindsay]

46 additional overdrafts this year, last year, 2025. Financial audit history. No, the first.

[Philli]

The first number that you. The first number that you gave might be both combined, because that's a combined checking and saving statements.

[Caleb Hammer]

Maybe, but I don't know. I don't know.

[Lindsay]

It was right below the checking account.

[Caleb Hammer]

Usually at the top is where the combine is not below each account, so I don't think so, but potentially. But you, regardless. What are you doing? Your life is destroyed. There's nothing I can do. There is nothing I can do. I'm gonna make you a budget, but there is nothing I can do. You're. Where's your retirement boy?

[Philli]

I don't have it.

[Caleb Hammer]

Oh, my goodness.

[Lindsay]

You have no more of a privileged

[Caleb Hammer]

position than anyone else in the history of the show, as far as I can remember, at least of where you came from and the position you are in and the cost of living that you are dealing with. And you have thrown it away. You have destroyed your life.

[Philli]

Oh.

[Caleb Hammer]

Oh, my goodness. Let me get your minimum monthly payments. How. How do you exist then? This is. Shut the up. You're a broken. You've made me a broken man out of your brokenness. What are you. How did it take so long for you to get on the show? Somehow I.

[Lindsay]

Listen, I don't know.

[Caleb Hammer]

It's. It's. It's. It's.

[Philli]

I applied within the first week of finding your show and then two more times after that.

[Lindsay]

Probably saw a picture of the nose

[Caleb Hammer]

and we just expected everything to be fine.

[Philli]

I didn't send a picture until. Actually, no, it doesn't.

[Caleb Hammer]

No. We always require. I didn't know it was part of the application. $1,604.41 is your debt payment outside of your mortgage. Mortgage is 579. All utilities, including the Internet combined.

[Philli]

How much Internet? 90. Electric is usually about 250. Gas is usually about. At most 130. And then that water, sewer, trash is 89.

[Lindsay]

Okay. Utilities, 559. Phone bill.

[Philli]

212.

[Caleb Hammer]

When you move to the better place with more connectivity. Do helium. Cause it's T mobile's towers. So much cheaper. What is it? 249, 212.

[Philli]

I think it's like 212 or 249.

[Lindsay]

212.

[Caleb Hammer]

That's crazy.

[Philli]

212. Well, I find it.

[Caleb Hammer]

Yeah. Once you pay them off and switch, what's your gas bill? Vroom, vroom. Drive. Drive.

[Philli]

Well, before now, now just like the beginning. I do not care about like 50 bucks okay.

[Caleb Hammer]

Car insurance.

[Philli]

And car insurance is 230.

[Caleb Hammer]

Yeah. 300 for food use. Our meal plan and the budget class that you get through the master your money program which you all should [e-mail] join the thousands of other people who are changing their lives enjoying that community. It's very active. It's incredible. You get all the classes and a lot of resources and then obviously the cookbook. Use that for the recipes. But either way TP 500 bucks. Anything else you need to survive on your lube for your endless masturbation of Twitter chicks, medical, health care, their copays?

[Philli]

Nope.

[Caleb Hammer]

Okay. You probably need some but you have two cats, right?

[Philli]

Yes, I both have insurance.

[Caleb Hammer]

How much?

[Philli]

76 total.

[Caleb Hammer]

Okay. How much for prep food?

[Philli]

Food is probably going to be about 110.

[Caleb Hammer]

Anything. Let's see. Subscriptions. You're very online. I'll try 75 bucks.

[Philli]

I only have YouTube Premium anymore.

[Caleb Hammer]

Those are the literal. Actually I would say two best. Listen people dog on YouTube premium. But it's. I. I could never go back. It is the best membership I've ever had. Plus it gets comes with YouTube music and not even sponsored. You should YouTube listen to me sponsor me. But either way it's like you get YouTube music which is just as good as Spotify with it it's just like. There's just everything. It's crazy. But regardless. Okay, I'll do 50 bucks which we'll cover more than that and. Cause you gotta get audible's a subscription too dude. Or whatever Kindle. So it all adds. But anything else that I need to put in your budget?

[Philli]

No, that should be it. I don't really have anything else outstanding that I owe monthly.

[Caleb Hammer]

No legal defense?

[Philli]

Nope.

[Caleb Hammer]

Okay. You make enough money. $3860.41 of the 4800 you bring in 93959 is left. Let's just say for the sake of. He's 900. Okay. Dude.

[Lindsay]

The fact is call your old job,

[Caleb Hammer]

see if you can get it back. You can't afford a higher cost of living area even with the more money because you're just not going to make it work. And selling the house. I don't want you to sell the house yet with this. With the two loans you have on it. You're not. You're going to. You might have to write a check. You might break even at best it's not going to go well. So with this 900 you left have leftover. It needs to all go towards the debt outside of the mortgage. But yes, the heloc needs to be paid off immediately as well. And the PayPal credit and all that good stuff, it all has to be paid off, dude. So I need you to stay in the lowest cost of living area that you possibly can for as long as you can. And then you can do whatever and move wherever once that's done. But if we get rid of the mortgage of $80,336.84, you still have 80,000 hours of bad debt to pay off. $79,276.37 of which the $900 going towards it still takes 88 months, seven years. You know what, get your old job back, stay prove for two months, you can actually follow this budget, make your minimum payments on time and then go through bankruptcy.

[Philli]

Well, there was another option that I had because of my parents. They said that if I wanted to I could sell the house and move back in with them potentially.

[Caleb Hammer]

But again, you're breaking even. You're breaking even. Why?

[Philli]

No, I wouldn't be paying rent and I wouldn't be paying the.

[Caleb Hammer]

No, but selling the house, you'll still break even.

[Philli]

So it's like wouldn't that it saves

[Caleb Hammer]

you money on a monthly basis and you can do that, but you're already in the real estate game anyway. And if you're going to stay there, I would rather you stay there and gain equity in there. And bankruptcy, it is stressful and it's not cheap. But this will clear. It'll clear pretty much all this dude, you'll the truck loans, not even a conventional truck loan. So it might cover that way. It's tight against your truck.

[Philli]

It's tight against my truck.

[Caleb Hammer]

So you'll still have that one and you'll still have your mortgage and heloc. They did so other than that you'll wipe everything.

[Philli]

They did say that once it gets to a certain point, like I think they said, it's like If I pay like 15000 off of it, I can.

[Caleb Hammer]

Okay, well that'll be a while.

[Philli]

But even still they would release that

[Lindsay]

will get to the point of being

[Caleb Hammer]

able to pay off your debt outside of your mortgage. Like your heat lock, obviously you'll have to pay off, but even still that'll bring it down from nine years to three or something. So then it's so worth it.

[Philli]

What should I focus on first then?

[Caleb Hammer]

Smallest debt to large.

[Philli]

Okay.

[Caleb Hammer]

Yeah.

[Lindsay]

Okay.

[Caleb Hammer]

Because it gives you rewards along the way. It's good for a psychological.

[Philli]

Would it, would it be better to either. I mean obviously you said smallest, largest, but like would the credit cards be first or should I focus on the a firm first since the affirm firm. Yeah, the affirm since it has a higher interest rate, small start.

[Caleb Hammer]

Just balances. Don't overcomplicate it. It'll be fine. That's exactly what I would do. All right guys. There's a lot in the post show. Oh my goodness. I guess there's some family debt we didn't talk about.

[Lindsay]

Oh, and his mom just confronted on him. Oh for sake.

[Caleb Hammer]

We might call it this. Okay, join Hammerly the best membership on YouTube. He's proved that. Three premium shows. Incredible high quality shows posted every single day. Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday. Click that join button. Let's get the Hammer financial score. Spending in a budget. Overspent 0 out of 10 debt HELOC and everything but no collections 1 out of 10. No IRS. That emergency fund. There was nothing 0. 10 returns. There's nothing 0 to 10 real estate

[Lindsay]

got a heat lock.

[Caleb Hammer]

You know you'd break even. It's. Eli has 12%. It's not great. I'll bring it to a three out of 10 for now. Once the helix gone it'll definitely go up immediately. So. Yeah, I mean the website. Yeah, it's pretty much identical. The website I got you is run it up to a one as well. Just like the site did. Get yours@caleb hammer.com now join us in the post show. It's gonna be a good one. See you there.

[Lindsay]

Called the police on you.

[Philli]

She called the police on me at the same exact time I called them on her.

[Sponsor Voice]

But she did steal from from you.

[Philli]

Yeah, she did. She stole from you.

[Lindsay]

She stole from you.

[Philli]

She stole one of my credit cards. The quicksilver card. She stole that dude. And then she stole my Nintendo Switch. And your heart.

[Lindsay]

What is wrong with you? You don't pay your bills, you're overdrafted, honestly. And you won't pay your mother back even though they've given you everything.

[Caleb Hammer]

What is wrong with you?

[Sponsor Voice]

Yeah, Caleb, there's one more thing I

[Philli]

wanted to bring up. If it's what I think it is, you're gonna hate me.

[Lindsay]

Don't forget to download the new dollar wise budgeting app. This is officially now the best budgeting app on the market. And I'm giving you a special deal to download, but only through March 31st. Take a free three day trial to test it out. And then you get the monthly plan at a 33% discount for the first three months or the annual plan at an insane 50% discount through with the annual you get my Budget Friendly Cookbook and my brand new 30 day detailed budget meal plan signed by me and mailed directly to you. After March 31st. The cookbook is going away forever. So this is literally your last chance. Don't miss the opportunity of a lifetime. Download Dollar Wise and start your free trial. Go to Dollarwise.com or click the link below.