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A
To watch episodes of Financial Audit a week earlier, Check us out on YouTube.
B
I am hiding a big purchase that I recently made and I bought it right next to her without telling her.
A
Right next to her.
B
Right next to her.
A
The are you talking about?
B
It's my money. I mean, it's our money. Sorry. Couple quick buttons and it was purchased, man.
A
I set up a camera and she got to watch this live. So we're going to bring her in. She's seen what you've talked about so far. Be honest with me. Are you guys only not married because of this? Is this the almost like last standing hurdle bundle? All of my educational programs I've ever made, plus the premium version of my budgeting app for not only 80% off, but also with a free trial today@dollarwise.com Join the tens of thousands of people who've changed their lives and join dollar wise Central right now for free.
B
Hi, my name is Scott and I'm 29 years old. I'm from San Antonio, Texas and this is Financial Audit.
A
Thanks for coming up, man. Double sunglasses, double the power.
B
You already know.
A
Appreciate it. So what do you do in San Antonio for a living?
B
So I am, I'm in the railroad industry. So I'm a railroad carman. So I work on trains. Mechanic. Beautiful.
A
How much does that pay?
B
That pays $24.72.
A
It's a little lower than I would have thought, I'll be honest. But you know, San Antonio, cheapest of the major cities in Texas. Let's see how we're stretching this. How many hours a week are you putting in? What hits your account?
B
Yes. So I'm putting in 50 hours a week. That's with OT, of course, 40 hours, I'm hitting about 4,000amonth.
A
Okay. Yeah, but you hit 50. Yeah. So what's hitting your account on a monthly basis?
B
Normally on a monthly basis, I'd say about 48.
A
Okay, 48, perfect. So 4800 hitting the account. I mean that would definitely, certainly be hard to live off alone. San, it's still a major city, but it's one of the cheaper cities. But it is still $57,000 a year. And that's actually sitting around that annual salary of about $54,000 a. But of course you're working 50 hours a week to hit this overtime. Now I am wondering because I, I didn't get to meet you guys before coming on, but I thought I saw someone else walking around. So is, is this a dual income household instead of friends?
B
So it is a dual income Household. It's me and my. My girlfriend.
A
Your girlfriend?
B
Oh, yes.
A
So you're not married?
B
We are not married, no.
C
Oh.
A
How long have you guys been together?
B
We've been together for about three years to income.
A
So you guys put everything down the middle. How are we doing this? Because you guys aren't combined on accounts, right?
B
Yes. So we do have one combined account.
A
No, you're combining accounts. Yes. Well, the marriage is coming soon. Okay, so what is the joint account?
B
So the joint account, that's pretty much all the bills that come out, you know, split down the middle.
A
So it's a checking account?
B
Yes, checking account. We do have a checking and a saving account.
A
Joint savings.
B
Joint savings with an unmarried.
A
Interesting. Little risky, but okay. Cool. What does she bring in? I guess she's too afraid to be on camera. That's. Okay. Well, you guys aren't married, so.
B
Yeah, so she's. I'd say Roughly, she makes 67,000 a year. So I'm not too sure exactly how much that.
A
What does she do? Making more than you?
B
Yeah, she's. She's a curbside manager for Heb.
A
And that makes more money?
B
Yes, Heb.
A
Dude, we've had people working there. You can. You can. You can work your way up at most places. I mean, that is straight up food service, retail. In that. In that world, the grocery store life.
B
Oh, yeah.
A
And out there making almost $70,000. What hits the account from her? If we have a joint account where money is going in and bills are being spent, you should know how much is coming in from her, because it would be an important mathematical component to this conversation.
B
So actually, I do not know how much.
A
How do you not know how much is coming into a joint account when that is where all the bills are paid?
B
So the joint account, we. She's the one that's mainly in charge of the bills.
A
So someone you are not married to?
B
Yes, that is correct.
A
You're the one here. Okay, so what is your insight into the finances then?
B
So we do have a calendar that we actually, you know, who have all the due dates on. She's more than one in charge of that? I just kind of look at it.
A
When you say she's in charge of it, do you mean she's running it? She's what's posting there? She's what's, you know, adding things to the calendar, taking things away and paying the bills?
B
Yes.
A
So you're just aware that a calendar exists?
B
Yeah, I'm just aware, like, hey, you know, the calendar is there, you know, but what?
A
Are you aware of the financial situation as a whole of you guys? If we're considering you guys together, what are you even aware of?
B
The due dates, man. That's pretty much it.
A
Just to do this. But you don't even know, like, the overall balance that the minimum payment for that due date is actually going towards. And you don't know what the balance of the account that is paying these minimum payments are or how much is going into those accounts.
B
It's just like, hey, this is a due date. This is the amount. And it. I. I'm more of like, hey, it'll. It'll pay.
A
So what do you care then?
B
I.
A
What's your care? What's your. Because you've obviously just been okay with looking at a very high level. So you have at least no care. From what I can tell out of the gate, maybe that's wrong. You certainly wouldn't be backing that up with never taking any action to get more information on the accounts and financial situation.
B
Well, I. I do. I do try to take account, you know, I. I do ask, like, hey, you know, whenever this bill is due, what's the amount? We look at the.
A
Yeah, the minimum.
B
The minimum. Yeah.
A
But why are you doing no more than just the high level? Why are you not trying to learn more about the accounts? What is actually happening? Especially if you're letting someone that you are not married to completely manage this for you?
B
We just. We don't see. I. You know, on. On any. Any money. Yeah. We don't see eye to eye when it comes to money. So.
A
What?
B
We just tell me I'm the spender in the relationship. I. I don't.
A
So the spender shouldn't know what's happening? Well, isn't that kind of the opposite? It shouldn't the person who is spending be the one that's super informed on the finances so they don't overspend and the entire relationship. So I've been showing you how many data brokers sell and collect your private information. Yeah. What? And I had to use Aura, who was answering today's video, to put an end to it. Huh. Check this out. Now Aura automatically is starting to opt your information out of these sites. And honestly, it makes me sick that these data brokers are making billions off your personal info without your permission. They don't care if it leads to spam calls, phishing scams, or worse. We all know why this happens. Google and other apps, even our cars, vacuum up our data and sell it. What's the alternative? Become a hermit? With no Internet. But at least now you've got options. Aura helps you fight back automatically. And I mean truly automatic. Once you set it up, Aura starts scrubbing your info in background while you go on living your life. Plus, Aura is going to give you a ton of other features to keep you safe and private, like fraud alerts, a vpn, identity theft insurance, and more. Try it for free for 14 days at aura.com/hammer and let Aura do what our government won't protect your privacy, I'd.
B
Say to a certain extent, to be honest.
A
So if you're the spender, you guys don't see eye to eye. So she disagrees with your spending. So what are these conversations like then?
B
So these conversations are pretty much, hey, you know, x some, you know X X bill is due and we copy and paste response.
A
Okay, we heard that. We know what bill is due. What's the conversation? If you guys disagree about spending money, what are those conversations?
B
Those conversations are more like, hey, you know, we, you know, it's, it's pretty harsh.
A
Are there conversations or are you shut down? You don't listen? What would she say? The conversations are the converse.
C
There.
B
There is no conversation. I do shut down.
A
And how do you know, how do you even know then that you gu disagreement about this? You're saying we don't see I. Is what you said.
B
Yeah. So she doesn't like my spending habits whatsoever.
A
Okay, how do you know this if you literally never talk about it? If you can't tell me a conversation that's had about it, how can you even say that? What if that's the complete opposite?
B
Well, it's not. I know she doesn't like my spinning habits.
A
Okay, then tell me what the talks.
B
Around that are the talks around that are. You know, I'll just, I'll go behind her back and I'll just buy stupid things that, that, you know, I shouldn't be buying.
A
Go behind her back? Specifically, yes.
B
So I don't tell her anything about, you know, my spending habits and, and what I purchase.
A
But if she's running the finances, would she not see? What, what is the behind the back? How does that look like? How are we achieving that?
B
So we're achieving that. I do have my separate checking account where my, so my paycheck actually goes into that.
A
Where does her paycheck go?
B
Her paycheck goes to her own separate paycheck.
A
And then you guys put into the joint.
B
Yes, and then we put into the joint for all the bills.
A
Okay, what's your guys conversations around each other's checking accounts then? Because if you're specifically saying you go behind her back, what does that look like? What does that even mean in this context?
B
I would say just I get paid right in my own checking account and.
A
No, I know I'm saying the go behind her back. Like in general, if you have your own account, she has her own account. What is the behind her back?
B
We just not having those proper conversations in regards to, hey, you know, asking for, for permission. If I do want to buy something that's.
A
Do you have to ask permission to buy a taquito? Do you have to ask permission to buy a gusher? Do you have to ask permission to get a bottle of water? How, how is this working? I'm trying to get more understanding on what you mean by behind her back.
B
Gotcha. So I had the fact that I saving or putting any money into the.
A
Spending behind her back. Well, sorry, are you telling me you guys agreed on putting a select amount of money towards savings?
B
Yes. And then you didn't and then I.
A
And then you spent it? Is that what you're alluding to?
B
So, yes.
A
In other words, you just say that that makes so much more sense because yes, that would be behind her back. If we are agreeing as a couple, as someone who intends to get married, to become fiance and get married and maybe pump out a few kids to go behind the goal that we set together. What was the. Did you agree to this goal?
B
Yes. So we, when was this goal? We, this goal was when we actually first moved in. So together, which was three years ago. We had an apartment together and then we recently, you know, got a house. So the conversation.
A
Rented or bought?
B
We bought.
A
You bought a house together? Unmarried?
B
Unmarried, yes.
A
Why? What are you guys trying to do if you can't literally control your spending? She runs the finances and instead of actually putting money towards savings like you both agreed to three years ago, you then go spend it all on bull. Why the are you guys getting a house together when you can't even communicate finances? That makes no sense. It's so risky.
B
I, I mean, I, I, I really love her. Right? I, I love the, the crap out of her. And I know that's you love her.
A
You just don't actually do any of the things you commit to.
B
I, I would, I would disagree to that because we do do a lot of things that we do commit to financially. Not financially, but one of the leading.
A
Causes for divorce in this country. It's not great to have that flaw before even getting to the married part.
B
I. I disagree, to be honest.
A
Go on. Are you talking about.
B
So, you know, I just feel that regardless of my spending habits, I mean, it's. It's my. It's my money. I mean, it's our money. Sorry, but.
A
Go on. I just have to hold. But keep going. Dirt over your shoulder.
B
I'm the baby of the family, and things just tend to work out. You know what?
A
Yeah. This doesn't make any sense. What? Do you disagree? Well, no, no, no, no. You said you disagree. What's the argument?
B
The argument is I. I mean, baby, are you talking about. Dude, I mean, I just feel like I have the right to spend. Yeah, I mean, I may go behind her back.
A
No one's saying don't. Yeah, I may go behind her back. Yeah, I may. Another woman. No, but who cares? What.
B
I don't condone that, but I just. I just feel that I do have the right to spend thing, you know, on. On things that.
A
That no one says you don't. But you agreed to commit to something that was savings. You agreed to that. You didn't do that and said you spent your own money. You went behind your back. You broke your word to the person you love and want to marry. So. What the fuck are you talking about? No one's saying you can't spend money. You're specifically agreed to a goal. You're not contributing to it, and then you're blowing everything.
B
You know what if you go, you know, through the actual statements, I am saving. Not as much as I should be saving or committing to that goal.
A
What you should be saving. What was the. What was the agreed upon goal?
B
The agreed upon goal was, hey, we would go ahead and say she deposited $250 into the account. Then I would also deposit it $250 into the savings account.
A
How frequen. Because that's.
B
So we both get paid weekly. Right. So on a weekly basis, hey, you're putting in four, 300 bucks, whatever, then I would match that.
A
But that doesn't necessarily make sense, especially if you. She makes more than you and your guys's finances going into the marriage. I will end of the relationship. I assume we're not identical. It doesn't make sense that whenever she decides to contribute however much she wants, that you would be able to do the same exact thing immediately. That. That doesn't make any sense.
B
Oh, in my. In my head it does make sense. You know, like, hey, I'm contributing this X amount of money into the account. So if I'm doing that, you know, most of the time. Right. I feel like I should be able to spend no one saying that is.
A
You not fulfilling the commitment you made though. Even if it was a weird commitment because I am not a hundred percent be very curious what she'd say about that. Is that what you guys agreed to? If she puts whatever dollar amount you match it right then. Right there.
B
Right then and there. Most.
A
That doesn't make sense though. What are your finances going into the relationship?
B
So my finances are actually not the greatest. Going into the relationship. Yeah. Actually I had been evading taxes for two years previous.
A
Are you talking about. What does that even mean? Why. I know what it means, but why the were you doing that?
B
I was just. You know what? I was like, you know what? I don't want to be paying this.
A
Nobody does if that.
B
You know.
A
As what. What was your job?
B
My job? I actually worked for Carvana, so while I was doing that.
A
So commission.
B
Yeah. So. Well, not. Not really commission pay. It was hourly based, but I was W2.
A
You're just taking absolutely no withholdings.
B
So it wasn't. It was hourly based. So I was a W2. So they were withholding taxes.
A
What do you mean you're evading taxes if they're withholding? So I just weren't filing.
B
Was. Yeah, I just wasn't filing any of the taxes.
A
You may have gotten a return.
B
I. I was actually still having to pay whenever I was filing. I was having a just, you know, pay. Pay the amount that I needed to, you know, or that they were charging me.
A
Are you saying you owed more at the end of the tax season? Is that what you're trying to construct in a form of a sentence?
B
Yes, in a form of a sentence. I was trying to.
A
Glad I could help you get there, but. Okay. Okay. So your finances were not good when you got married and now you're not communicating anything. You aren't sticking to a single goal. And then you guys got a mortgage together. I assume it was a mortgage, right? It is not cash.
B
Yeah, not cash.
A
Okay.
B
However we did, there was a down payment that we both split to be able to get the house together.
A
But you have as far as I know. Because you wouldn't be on the show without a horrendous debt. Oh. Yep. So what the are you doing? Is this her debt and your debt? What does.
B
No. So that's actually just my debt.
A
This is just you. Okay, then it's okay then. I'm just talking to you then I'm okay with that. Okay. What's her debt?
B
She has no debt. To be honest, she is the one that takes care of all the finances. I mean, she's been like that ever since.
A
Why is she putting up with you? Why is she getting on a mortgage with you? That's so risky of her. That makes no sense.
B
I mean, my girlfriend made me go to counseling for all this, to be honest.
A
So that means she trusts you to make a. You went into. Okay, went into counseling to fix this.
B
Yes.
A
Okay, we know what comes in from your paycheck. What did you spend last month from your accounts? Because apparently I only have your accounts.
B
If I had a guess, I'd say 3,000, maybe.
A
Pay counseling hasn't worked. It was $8,000.
B
8,000?
A
What the are you talking about? Counseling? Counseling to figure this out. You don't even know what's going on. You spent double what you brought in, you tit. The. You putting money down on a down payment. How much did you put down?
B
We. So it was 6200. So we split that in half.
A
So FHA.
B
FHA?
A
Yes.
B
First time home buyers.
A
Damn. Don't necessarily always like that. Especially in a confusing market time like this. You might not have an equity position if you're forced to sell the house. Even if you are forced to sell the house, that percentage isn't really getting you much. If you have to pay for commission on both ends of the seller and buyer realtors. How did you come up with that amount of money? How long did you have to prepare for that? Because again, you're spending double you're not paying on your debt.
B
So it took about a month and a half actually to be able to come up with that down payment.
A
How'd you do that? But you're not paying off debt.
B
I. I was actually budgeting then.
A
And then you gave up. You got the house. You got the house.
B
And I honestly, man, I just got comfortable, to be honest with you. I. After we got the house, I was like, you know what? It all work itself out. You know, I recently got a raise. So I was like, you know what? If I'm making more, maybe I can spend more, you know.
A
Listen, if she demands you go to counseling. What does that even mean? Counseling for what specifically? For the finances.
B
For the finances.
A
She demanded that.
B
Yes.
A
And all of that when she must not trust you if she's making you go to literal financial counseling therapy. Little odd. I'll be honest. Maybe it's to fix the actions and hope spending that you have. I'm assuming so it was more of.
B
Just me hiding my purchases from Her.
A
That's what she found out?
B
Yes. So she found.
A
She find out.
B
So she found out with, I guess by me, just, you know, she would see all the Amazon boxes that were coming in.
A
Oh, yeah, that's not hiding very well, I'll be honest.
B
And then, you know, just. Just crazy purchases, man. You know me. Just.
A
Is there anything she doesn't know about today? There's honor.
B
I mean, I'm glad that she's not here today listening to this, because she'd be extremely mad. But I am hiding a big purchase that I recently made, which was, I'd be honest, a tv.
A
So how do you buy a TV without someone knowing it's going to show up?
B
So I was literally on my phone on afterpay, and I was like, you know what? I want a bigger tv. Why not? And I bought it right next to her without telling her.
A
Right next to her?
B
Right next to her.
A
The are you talking about, dude?
B
I mean, I just, you know, couple quick buttons and it was purchased, man.
A
Why would you not want to communicate that with her? That's so weird. How much was this?
B
This was.
A
Is that what this is?
B
Yes, that should be the afterpay one. So it was.
A
It was not even like the most expensive thing in the world, but instead of 22.08% interest, I was like, you know what?
B
I don't want to buy it. Right then, you know, just flat out purchase it, you know, because obviously she would have found out a lot sooner. And I was like, you know what? I'm just going to use after pay finance it.
A
She's going to find out from watching this episode. What was your plan to communicate this? Plus, it shows up at the house. What are you going to do when she asks how'd you pay for this?
B
So, I mean, I'm just going to flat out tell her, just like, hey.
A
Why didn't you tell her then?
B
Because I knew she would pretty much not allow me to get that tv.
A
She literally has sent you to counseling how recently? It sounds pretty recent.
B
Pretty recent? I'd say about two weeks ago.
A
Okay. If she's doing that and then you immediately backstab with this. This is like someone who got caught cheating, got sent to therapy to deal with it, and then cheats after they go to therapy. What the are you doing, man?
B
Also, she doesn't know that I paid for mount insulation as well. So they're actually coming out to deliver the TV and mounted on the wall for me.
A
In your plan exactly when they showed.
B
Up was, hey, I got a New tv.
A
I got a tv. Okay.
B
So, yeah, that was just my plan. And then like, hey, you know, got a tv. It's already mounted. I'm not able to return it. So, you know, just go with the flow, man.
A
All right, well, and I'll be honest, a little self confession on my part. We went behind your back a little bit. Went behind your back a little bit. And we've never done it. But listen, the producers knew that you were specifically hiding things from them and the onboarding conversation we had, so I set up a camera and she got to watch this live. And unfortunately, we are going to turn this into a couple's daughter for you. But the fact is, I mean, the confrontation is not happening when the TV shows up. The confrontation is happening now because this is a show where couples talk about it. And even though it seemed like she didn't want to be on camera, oh, she's willing to be on camera because she knows that you're in. This is why she sent you to therapy. This is why she wanted you to come on the show, man. She worked with us to actually get this set up so that you guys have a real conversation for the first time in your damn lives because you just keep hiding things. So we're gonna bring her in. She's seen what you've talked about so far. And buddy, let's bring in Miss Kelly. Ladies and gentlemen, a financial audit. This is one of the most exciting moments in this channel's history. You know, I've been working on building all these educational tools, our budgeting app, all this crazy stuff over this past year because that is where my passion is. We finally did it and now we put it all into one program called Dollar wise Central. You get the premium version of my budgeting app. You get the cookbook mailed to you and signed by me. You get to learn about debt, investing, budgeting, real estate, basic beginner stuff, and finance, all the way to the advanced stuff. Collaborated by experts with the lowest refund rate in the industry for a reason. And guess what? Just for the next two weeks, you can try it for free. If you are struggling or you want to learn more or you want to change your life in any way whatsoever, like literal tens of thousands of people have done with our programs. Go to Dollarwise.com click that link below. Your life will change. It'll be incredible. And I am here for you with an incredible support team that you can reach at any time. This is a no brainer. Dollar wise dot com. Let's go. 28 years old from San Antonio, Texas. Future fiance, Future potential wife of Scott. So, Scott, get your ass over there. I mean, it's a critical piece of a conversation to be able to communicate what is happening financially with your partner if you guys want to be together forever. And I'm glad you came to us with this. I'm glad you came to us with this. And honestly, pretty damn good idea that you and the producers had. I'll be honest. I mean, what did you think of what you heard? Because this guy literally just purchased a brand new tv. I assume you heard that, correct?
C
No, Yeah. I was in the other room.
A
Okay.
C
So I. He was already being shady. I found like bags from Boot Barn in the closet with receipts. Actually, I think the shirt that he's wearing, hiding it. Yes. In the closet.
A
The is wrong with you. This is. This is like an addiction. So. And you had him apply for the show, right?
C
I applied for him.
A
Exactly. Smart little game she played. Okay, respect.
C
It was over probably like a hundred dollars in just shirts from Boot Barn, he calls them.
A
Perfect opinion in your mind from your viewing of this throughout your relationship. When did you first start seeing this? How has it looked? What do you think? You called him a man child in the application. Okay, buddy. Yeah, yeah, I'd be cope. Laughing too.
B
Definitely.
A
That's why. Okay, I want to go back to the question I just asked, but why the are you getting on a mortgage with this guy that is consistently lied and you keep finding out and then you just learned about a new purchase, literally right now, because he cannot stop that you requested to go on defense financial audit of which you called him a man child in the application of whom you also sent to counseling. Why are you getting on a mortgage with him? Unmarried.
C
So getting or going? Towards the end of our apartment lease, everything was getting better. Like I told him, hey, you need to watch your spending. And he did for a little while.
A
Hide better.
C
He may have hit it better. Honestly.
A
You don't have access to a separate account, right?
C
No. So I only have access to our joint account. So we have my checking, he has his checking.
A
But you tell me be honest right now, in the couple months that you were doing better, how much extra precaution was put aside for hidden purchases?
B
I would say, at the very least, this is it.
A
This is fucking now. I don't want Bull. No, half of my check, half of the pack went to Bull.
B
Yes. So at the time, we were only paying. What was it, 500?
C
So in the apartment, I was paying more because I make more.
A
Yeah, fair enough.
C
And so he was only paying.
A
He just said half of his paycheck went to bull. Even though you thought he was getting better? Insta reaction.
C
Yeah. So I think. I just don't know what to believe anymore. I don't. This is why we went to counseling. Because I'm like, hey, yes, it's counciling.
A
Couples counseling.
B
Yes, couples counseling.
A
Yeah. He immediately leaves the session, sits next to you, and orders the TV on. A firm with 23% interest. Not a firm, whatever. After pay at one of those.
C
How much interest?
A
22.08. Without you. Now, he was literally only going to tell you when it showed up at the house, by the way.
C
Amazing. Yeah. Yeah, sounds right.
A
Can't hide that. Like a shoebox.
B
I mean, to be fair, my.
A
To be fair, what?
B
My credit limit did increase via afterpay, so I did, you know, that's why I extended payment.
A
To be fair, her OC was tight. What if he said that when it came to cheating? Does that. Is that how that works? No, to be fair, her tits were big. Like, I'm. What? This excuse is a cheat. I'm using that analogy because this is basically like financial cheating. Financial cheating. You went behind your back after agreeing and going to counseling and all these conversations that she fucking applied on the show for what is very clear reasons.
B
Now, there's no. There's no other explanation. But, I mean, I'm still glad I made that purchase, man.
C
For what?
B
I mean, it's.
A
For.
C
I mean, we did not need a new TV. We did not. We had what, a 52, 55.
B
A 55 inch.
C
A 55 inch TV. We just got the house, like, May 6th. We did not need a new TV.
A
Did you just hear what he said? He has no regret. He literally went behind your back and he has no regret. Like, I don't even know what to do with that. Because that's not denial or pushing back. That's not fighting me on something that is just a complete.
C
I don't give a. Oh, I did wrong.
A
Yeah. He's not even saying he did wrong.
B
I mean.
A
What are your thoughts on this? Dude, talk to him, man. He's here. He's here. Now, listen, this is the conversation that you probably should have had. He was gonna wait for the TV to show up for it. Now's your time.
C
So then the TV shows up and then what?
B
I mean, it's already installed, so it's like, I'm not gonna return it. You know, that's.
C
No, we are returning it. We don't need that TV. I mean we, we already have two 55 inch TVs and now we have.
B
A 75 inch TV. So.
C
But for like you. But for what?
B
For sports. NFL.
C
I mean NFL, your team doesn't even win.
B
Ah, that's, that's not fair. But I just, I wanted a bigger TV so I can see the sports, fights, pay per views, all that great stuff. I mean, you know, that's.
C
So you're gonna spend more money to watch the fights?
A
Sure.
C
After we've already discussed that. We're not going to be spending extra money.
B
I mean it's not like it's a two or three thousand dollar tv.
C
You know, it's, it doesn't matter. That could have gone towards another debt. That could have gone towards literally anything else.
B
Well, now it's not. So.
A
What the kind of response is that? Dick, Is this how he usually acts? There's no personal responsibility? Is he a little nervous because he's on camera?
C
He usually just like laughs once he realizes I'm getting mad. He like does his little grin that he has right now and just laughs.
A
I don't know what you saw, what you heard because I don't know how that setup was over there. But did you hear the part where he talked about the literal factor? It's like, okay, so what are your guys conversations on this? Oh, so he doesn't even know what is said in the conversations.
C
Which sounds right because we argue about him not listening a lot.
A
Fucking kidding me. Okay, so then you tell me these conversations around finances, what actually happens? What do they look like in detail?
C
So we do have the calendar that I set up. It has like the account number when it's due and how much is due and then about a week and a half before it's due. I'm like, hey, you need to put this much into the account. I'm going to put this much because this payment is due. He kind of just puts money in account, looks away. That's it. I could probably scam him by telling him that more is due than necessary, honestly, because he doesn't know how much anything is.
A
How do we deal with someone who won't listen if he has no take away from any financial conversations? He couldn't bring up one point that you guys ever even talked about and then you guys have a disagreement about spending, which I think is an understatement now that we've kind of learned what is actually happening. But okay, so how do you even deal with that? Or what have you been doing to try to mend this? What So I don't even know.
C
So I saw the. The boot barn bag, right? So I was like, he's obviously still spending money. He doesn't take care of his things. For example, like his flashlights at work, he loses one. He's like, oh, I could just order anyone. So he's just spending unnecessary money. So it's making me, like, anxious because I have to have a plan with. We need to have this much money by this time. So I lost where I was going.
A
Be real. Be honest with me 100%. Are you guys only not married because of this? Is this the almost like last standing hurdle?
C
Well, he hasn't asked, first of all, but honestly, I don't think I could say yes knowing that he's like this.
A
She wouldn't say yes if you proposed, which is that unfair. I honestly would say no. One of the leading causes for divorce, your finances, from the sounds of it. Not that he would actually even know. Sounds like they're okay, right?
C
Yeah.
A
Okay, first of all, interesting pick of a person. Dodging taxes for two years when you guys first met, but okay. She would literally say no if you propose. So what are you doing to fix that? Buying a 75 inch TV for sports?
B
I mean, it's not the greatest idea, right? I do eventually want to ask him be able to marry.
A
What'S even.
C
His team, the Raiders.
A
I knew he was okay.
C
He even has it tattooed on him.
B
I do actually, mind you, I got that years ago. I didn't hide that tattoo or that purchase from her.
A
What of what have. So she's not gonna marry you? Do you even give a. I do.
B
I do.
A
Oh, yeah.
B
I mean, so it's. It's hurtful. You know, I. I do want to try to be a better person, you know, and. And actually work on these finances and take away these bad spending habits, you know, and it's. And honestly, it's more of like for the thrill of it.
A
It does not align with the attitude you have had so far and the things you've been saying. You don't even regret the TV purchase and you say it's for sports. You put it on a high interest card, you hit an intel delivery, and I can't tell delivery has happened or not. It doesn't even matter at this point. But it's just like this does not align with the sentiment you've had. Like, I. Okay, maybe when you think about marriage, all of a sudden you're like, oh, a little mushy. Yay. Yes, that's what I want. But the Actions you're leading outside of this room are not leading to that end result. They are not achieving that marriage that you want to. She's not gonna. She's not gonna tie the knot with you. Why would she? Why would she. Why would anyone with your history not being able to change? You're going to couples therapy, and you're not even changing. In fact, you've done something even worse again. So. Couples therapy. I want to get into these finances here in a second, but the last question. Okay, obviously, you brought the couples therapy in as a attempt to fix. As you've been finding this hidden spending, hidden purchases, all this stuff throughout the years. What have the attempts looked like to try to fix this?
C
For the most part, I. Well, I thought he was not spending, but it looks like he was just hiding it better. So I guess there haven't really been any attempts other than me trying to take him to couples counseling.
A
I want you to be able to be a little candid real quick because, you know, he was candid when he didn't know you're listening. And you'll know he's there, and, you know he can watch this back, but at least right now, I want you to be able to be candid. Can we put some headphones on him? And I want to ask you a couple more intimate questions into this relationship without the fear of him immediately hearing it now. Perfect. Scott? Scott, can you hear me? He needs a plane. Scott, you have a mic, don't you? That's what Kelly told me. Scott, your PP is so tiny. All right. He's nodding his head yes. So. All right, Ms. Kelly, in as much detail as possible, how this hidden spending affects your relationship on that deep. On the deepest levels.
C
So I don't trust him. I. Especially now that knowing he was sitting next to me buying the.
A
Make sure that is over his lobe. The Is wrong with this guy.
C
So just knowing that he was buying it right next to me, like, I'm insane. Yeah. Like, I've never. I know that.
A
Texting.
C
Yes.
A
Yeah.
C
And I know if I wanted to go through his phone, I definitely could, but, I mean, I don't feel the need to. And now I'm like, now I feel like I should.
A
Should we.
C
But I guess this time we should. I guess. NFL season last year, he was also hiding that he was sports betting.
A
Oh, no.
C
Yeah.
A
No.
C
And his.
A
Oh, me.
C
Yeah. His reasoning was, well, I'm. I'm winning more than I'm spending, and it's like, I don't care.
A
And let's see. If that's even true.
C
Yeah. So. And you're betting on it? I mean, I don't know how it works, but you're betting on a team that never wins anyway, so. I don't know, but it's just. It's causing me to not trust him. And I love him. I do. I feel like if we could get past this, we would have a strong future together. But right now, I just. That spending is just crazy.
A
Now, what made you suspicious of the spending in the first place?
C
I think mainly finding that Boot Barn bag and then the different Amazon packages. Like, with me, I'm very. Hey, I'm gonna get this. What do you think about that? Or I found a. I found it at a better price. What do you think about that? And him, it's kind of like he just gets it delivered. He's like, oh, with his little smirk, oh, I. I bought this for work or whatever.
A
Cute.
C
Yes.
A
Oh, man.
C
Yes.
A
I don't even know what the. How to even deal with something like that. Are there other things you think is hiding just based on this man, based on this history and just the lack of trust?
C
I. I don't. I couldn't tell you if he is. He's hiding it very well.
A
You haven't had a suspicion or fear? No, no fear of it.
C
I mean, as far as spending, I think that.
A
So you think this is strictly down to the spending?
C
Yeah.
A
Okay. What makes you so confident on that fact?
C
I think because of, like, I wanted to go on to his phone, I could. I don't. I know I wouldn't find anything.
A
I would say or strictly financially about hiding.
C
Very well, that could be true. I mean, I would hope not, but that could be true.
A
And then you got a house with him. Yes. What were your reservations on getting on a mortgage together?
C
I would say that he wouldn't have the payment in time.
A
Have you guys made a payment yet? This sounds pretty new.
C
Yeah, we just made our first mortgage payment.
A
Did he pay it on time?
C
Yes. Yes. But then that's when it came down to the calendar, where I was like, hey, like, our mortgage is due next week. He's like, oh, already? And I'm like, yeah, like, it's on a calendar. It's on a calendar.
A
And he gave it quick. Yes, okay.
C
It was in the account.
A
It means, like, the hard reminders.
C
Yes.
A
Okay.
C
And that's what I'm saying. It's like a child. Like, I'm like, okay, our bills are due. This is how much?
A
All right, let's bring him back into the conversation. You can unmute it. Wes. Scott, in your mind, do you feel like she has to treat you like a child?
B
Not necessarily. I mean I don't think I'm a child.
A
Bring the mic to your face would be number one.
B
No, no, I don't think I'm a child.
A
You don't feel like she has to treat you?
B
I don't feel that way.
A
Does she feel like she has to treat you as a child?
B
No.
A
Why?
B
Because a. I'm not a child. And I mean I'm a grown ass man. You know.
C
Is he, he's over the age of 18 which makes him an adult.
B
I mean I, she says she has.
A
To treat you like a child. She doesn't make a mortgage payment.
B
I mean at the end of the day the bills are getting paid, are they not?
A
Because she had to treat you like a child to get you to do was not on your own. It was via no personal responsibility of your own.
B
I mean it is my money that's going in there. I mean, sorry, our money.
A
This should be interesting.
C
Our money.
A
Well, you guys aren't married so I, I, I'm, I'm okay with that still being separate. But even still, when you guys do get married, I'm not confident he's gonna view it as yalls money. I think he's gonna view it as his money. And you're gonna get married to that. I. Why? Why? Clearly. And I'm okay with the hers mine right now. You guys are not married. You know, it's. The mortgage is weird. The combined account gets a bit weird. You guys have over complicated this before moving to the next step. Absolutely. But either way, clearly I don't think that mindset's gonna change. Why do you view this as like a hoarding?
B
I work hard for it, man. You know, and what's like why am I not able to splurge just a little bit?
C
I don't think it's about splurging a little bit. But I think that there's a lot of times where we could maybe compromise. We could compromise like you didn't need a 500 TV. Maybe we could have done like 300. Or you didn't need a 72 inch TV. Maybe we could have done. I don't know what's next 65. Whatever.
A
How do you compromise to someone who can't have the conversation who just giggles it all off.
B
I mean you ended up getting any phones, so.
C
Okay, but we talked about it. I, I got your, your input. Right. And I'm not saying that you need my permission. But it would have been nice to hear, hey, what do you think about this instead of just doing it? And my phone had been dying for like months before I even asked you, hey, what do you think?
B
But I figured, hey, you know, you, you get a new phone, why can't I get a new tv?
A
How much debt does she have outside of the mortgage?
C
I have my car and my, and, and obviously the mortgage interest of the.
A
Car.
C
Was it 6? 6%.
A
How much debt do you have outside the mortgage?
B
About 90k.
A
Well, yeah, I think you guys are in slightly different positions. I'm gonna go. 3, 2, 1. Go on. Go. I want you guys at the exact same time to give me what you think your household financial score is. Okay? 0 to 10, 0 being the worst, 10 being the best 10. I want to see where you guys think you are. 3, 2, 1. Go.
C
3.
A
Now what do you think his score is? Alone. Not with you.
C
Three.
A
Okay. Optimistic. Interesting. All right, if you want your financial score, take the assessment. It is free@calebhammer.com or click the link below. And if you don't want to be like a guest who shows up on this show, make sure you download our dollar wise budgeting app. Take that free trial and sign up for the annual version if you want to save a lot of money. But also get our budget friendly cookbook signed by me mailed directly to you. It's the only way. Receive one and you can join Dollarwise Central if you also want to combine all of our education products together, which are incredible for an 80% discount. Dollarwise.com let's get into these documents. Okay, so the TV you even know about. What is this? What? Affirm or what again?
B
Afterpay.
A
Okay, after pay. Great. It's an interesting time for business. Tariffs or trade policies are bouncing around like payday loan interest rates, supply chains are clogged and cash flow tighter than a TikTok Finance Bros budget. And if your business can't pivot in real time, you're already behind. And that is where Netsuite by Oracle comes in. The AI powered business management suite trusted by over 42,000 businesses. NetSuite gives you total visibility from global shipping to tariff impacts to real time cash flow. It is the one system that combines your accounting, inventory, HR and and all financials into one unified dashboard. No more duct taping spreadsheets together at 8am with real time forecasting and built in AI, you're not just seeing what's happening now, you're getting ahead of it. Automate Routine tasks stay lean and make smarter decisions fast. If I are running a business dealing with this kind of operational chaos, this is what I'd use. It is one system, full control. Tame the chaos with NetSuite. If your revenues are at least in the seven figures. Download the free ebook Navigating Global Trade. 3 insights for leaders@netuite.com that is netsuite.com Hammer thanks to NetSuite for sponsoring this episode. Let's get back to it. Well, it's about essentially right now. 597.53 is what I'm gonna say. 22.08 interest rate. If you walked into that TV and there was a 22.08 fee for buying it, would you.
B
Well, now that you say it out loud, probably not, but exactly. You know.
A
You know what? No, you know what?
B
I just. I wanted a bigger tv just to watch sports.
A
I think we understood that. No, I would die. That doesn't mean you lot. You would die on the hill. You would go behind your back again at a 22.08% interest rate. That's what he's saying. He would die on that hill. Did you hear that? He's dying on that hill.
B
Yeah, I wouldn't.
A
Thoughts because. What the.
C
What the. It's just he.
A
With that. What do you do with that?
C
I don't think he's ever seen, like, consequences. His actions. That's why he's just like, oh, yeah, like it. Everything will work out.
A
He also failed to tell her something else. What else? Because I don't know it either. What the. Have else have you not said?
B
I'm trying to think.
A
There's the else. Have you not said you titled?
B
I mean, there's probably other multiple things, but.
A
What the. What the. Did you not tell her? I don't know it, buddy. I don't know it. I'm not you. They're just telling me that there's something else. You failed. You failed to even tell her. Like, it's absolutely insane. I mean, the minimum payment on this is 56.28. And again, the interest charge is huge. But what did you fail to tell her? What did you feel?
B
So I. Now that I. I guess I'm. I'm remembering. I failed to tell her how much money we spent on the housewarming party, which was the whole reason why I wanted to get that tv. So.
A
Oh, yeah, you laugh about that. So that's. That's what we're laughing about, guy.
B
So. Yeah, she doesn't know that. We spent roughly around $800 for the housewarming party that was including beer, food, the entertainment.
C
Originally, he wanted to cater it, and I said no.
A
Hit her. Okay.
B
Some barbecue.
A
Yeah. Yeah. Make it yourself. Dude, I thought you were a big man. Isn't that what you said? I'm a big boy. You don't even know how to grill at 29.
B
I mean, I didn't grow up without a dad, so.
A
Huh.
B
I didn't grow up with my dad, so I wasn't taught how to.
A
So you should be the one cooking on a grill then. Younger.
B
I should.
A
Congratulations. You had the extra blessing of needing to cook on the grill at a younger age.
B
Better late than never.
C
But that's what I'm like.
A
He has the. Never is. He's never coming back.
C
He just doesn't. He's like, oh, Yeah, I spent 500 on this. I spent 800 on that. And it's like. At what point were you gonna say something?
A
Well, here's the reality. You guys should be able to afford that combined household income. But the fact is, how much did you think was spent on this?
C
Like 2, 200 max.
A
Now why did we have to hide this? Because that's even the thing. Again, this is not. It's not an insignificant amount of money. You guys can afford it. It could have been in a budget and I would have allowed this. But it's the. It's the action. What you did. You hid what was spent on it. Why? Why? It's the endless action of the hiding.
C
Why? I think that he's just easily influenced by his friends. He. His friends.
A
Friends say to do who can't grill?
B
So they said, go ahead and get a Blackstone griddle. And I wanted the Blackstone griddle.
A
But unfortunately, what's included in the housewarming party is you bought a griddle.
B
So we bought a griddle. So that way we're. We were able to go ahead and.
C
Barbecue instead of catering, instead of cater.
A
Okay. So in reality. And I'm not Blackstones, I do like them basically just grilled and like a cast iron pan on your stove. You didn't even get any fire burn on there or any charcoal taste. I mean, you just. Flat stone. I love a flat stone.
C
It's not just that, though. It's like, he'll be at work and he's like, John Smith walked in with these new boots and I want these new boots or so and so. Came in with a pearly. Now I want a pearly so and so. Got an Ariat wallet. I want an Ariat wallet.
A
Dude, you're cons. You're so consumer cultured. You're so consumer cultured, you just have to buddy individual therapy on potential addictive tendencies and cope spending around that consumer culture. Spending might be very important for you if you have your inability to control it. It's okay to get excited about things here and there. It's okay to get passionate about things. Maybe getting deep diving into the Blackstone and, you know, maybe I would support that. Maybe we can fit it in the budget. Thing is, if you just see something, see something, see something that someone else is doing, you're just hyper excited about it constantly and you have to get it no matter what. And you'll hide it behind your back. That means you're in the world of some kind of addiction similar to gambling. Some kind of addiction is similar to poison, some kind of addiction similar to sex. You have this addiction that you have to hide from someone else in order to fulfill. And that might require some individual therapy because clearly that is not just some one off thing. Would you agree? Huh? You literally had to hide behind her back that the housewarming party cost $800 when maybe if you guys talked about it, she would have supported it.
B
I mean, I guess my pushback on that would be. If I did talk to her about it, then we wouldn't be able to get everything that we.
A
So if you don't 100 win, you'll just go behind her back in order to achieve it. So no communication. She came to you and you agreed on the phone, even though she's in a better financial situation than you, and you guys are not married, but she came to you for input, you guys agreed and then she did it. Would you have done it if he did not agree?
C
Probably not.
A
So what are you on this other side with? Okay, doesn't matter what she says. I'm gonna do whatever the I want.
B
I know that I gotta learn from it.
A
And oh, what a answer. I mean, God's disgusting.
B
I just. Yeah, I mean, I guess if going to therapy helps, why not, you know?
A
Has he ever borrowed from you?
C
No, not that I know of.
A
Well, they're telling me he bought a UFC fight for the housewarming on accident on. Oh, on your credit card. And now you owe the money.
C
How much was it?
B
It's about $90. And actually, which again, that's not online.
A
It's not. It's not nothing. But it's also something, if you guys communicated about, it would have probably been fine.
C
No, because I don't have a balance on My Amazon.
A
Well, you probably pay it off without.
B
I mean I. I mean to be fair, right. I thought that it was my. I thought it was my Amazon account. That it was.
A
Yeah. But once you found out why the would you not communicate it?
B
She actually saw right then and there soon while I was purchasing it, so.
A
Huh.
C
Yeah, I didn't.
B
Oh I. I thought that you didn't and I just went along with it.
C
You know, or anything.
A
Okay. Okay.
B
I guess not. Yeah, I didn't guys. And that was actually three paper b fights that I bought that that night of the what? The housewarming party.
A
What a catch. Okay, let's talk about whatever this is. Okay. There's a Honda. Okay. The. This is a substantial minimum. What is this car? I assume this is your car because these are only your statements, right?
B
Yeah, these are my statements.
A
Okay. What is this car?
B
It's a Honda Civic hybrid Sport Touring Year 2025.
A
Did you need this much of a car?
B
I did not. But my guess what you're saying. No, my reasoning behind it was the car that I had before was under a co signer. Right. So I just wanted to go ahead and get them out of it by the car.
A
You had. But why didn't you just refinance that loan? How much was left on that loan?
B
It's about five years still. That previous car balance you tit about 27,000.
A
Okay. So you borderline doubled it and you use that as a justification. The. Oh, I want to get them off the cosign. That's. No, that's stupid.
B
I guess my pushback on that right. Would be. I just didn't want. You know. So.
A
Well, now you have a $760.40 minimum payment.
B
It's still a hybrid though.
A
You have to work 50 hours a week. And even when you work 50 hours a week, buddy, even when you. It's still a hybrid.
C
The.
A
Who gives a man. I drive an electric car, but I'm not jerking it off. Some would say I am, but. And that's the 16 of your income working 50 hours a week. 50 hours a week. 16% of your income goes to this car. It's horrendous.
B
I was able to get the co center off and.
A
Well, yes, I assume you traded this in, right?
B
Yes, and I was upside down about 8 grand. That's what was tacked on for this one.
A
So it was. So what was even the point at that point then? Because now you must be dramatically underwater on this.
B
I'm not too sure. I haven't, you know, seen exactly how much? The. How much the vehicle's worth recently. But I do have about 18, 000 miles on it.
A
Okay. We're figuring out the value of the car. I understand wanting to get a cosigner off. I do understand that. But again, there were smarter options. And your dad. So did you not need a co signer for this?
B
I did, actually. She's my cosigner.
A
Okay, great. Who was the. Who's the cosigner? The original one. My.
B
One of my good buddies. So he wanted to get a truck for his dad. Whose vehicle? Truck.
A
Why'd you co. Sign for this? Why'd you co sign for this? Why are you supporting his behavior?
C
Yeah, I. I don't have an answer for you.
A
His never ending behavior. Why are you supporting it?
C
So originally he wanted to try and get a truck. I don't even know what kind of a V8 truck. Some. I don't know.
B
Ford F150.
A
Great. So you can pick up your weekly.
B
Groceries, actually move furniture around, but. Yeah, that too.
A
Yeah. How. How often? One. Twice a year. Help friends move.
C
Yeah. Well, I guess his reason was because we were gonna move out of the apartment we don't have to spend.
A
So I have to literally go tens of thousands of dollars into debt into a huge depreciating asset to move out once instead of going to Home Depot and renting a truck. What the Is wrong? What kind of logic is that? Now, of course. What do you think it's worth? Because It's. You owe $44,502.21. What do you think it's worth? I got the value.
B
I believe it's worth about 24, 27.
A
But that's still insane, buddy. That's still ridiculous. It's only worth what the last car you owed. On it.
B
Yeah, I guess working for Carvana didn't help. You know my insights on.
A
Never go to Kavarna, anyone. Anyway, regardless, everything's just overpriced there, and they won't can come down on any price. There's no negotiating. It's all. It's a horrible place.
B
I don't know if it matters, but it is fully loaded, so it doesn't. Yeah.
A
I'm Kirby. Dude, I don't give a.
C
So I had like a semi meltdown when he got this car. Because you co.
A
Signed for it?
C
Yes, afterwards. Because I was like, if you're gonna pay it, do it. Fine, whatever. But I think the payment went up by like 150. The monthly payment.
A
So it was already riding in an unaffordable payment.
B
It was so the Corolla, which was a 2023. That one. The payment was 540.
A
Yeah, it was 5:40 with you. Man. This is insane. This term must be long. 76 payments left. Yeah. Kill me now, sake. I have to ask, I've asked this before and it could be a wake up call to your significant other. What percentage of you, and I know it's not 100 because you're still here, but what percentage of you from 0 to 100 is considering just walking the away because of everything that is happening.
C
Still, I'd say about 10. Where a part of me is like.
A
Ah, yeah, okay, so this is really isn't influencing you very much, I think.
C
Because I know he can hustle and everything will get paid, but it's just the stress that leads up.
A
What do you mean though? Like his dead is 90, 000 bad. What? What? How do you even know? How can you say you know that? Where's that evidence? I don't have it.
C
Yeah, I guess as far as like the monthly payments, I know that just.
A
Yeah, but that doesn't matter. The minimum adds more to the overall debt and hides things. I. I don't know.
B
I mean, to be fair, I've never been late on a payment that we've had together. I've always been able to come up with the. The money for it before the due date.
A
I could have swore I saw in these notes somewhere that you had collections.
B
Though those were previous to us.
A
So what do you think the word never means?
B
Okay, since we've been together.
A
Okay, this guy's a. I don't even believe that. Honestly. You're not a reliable narrator at all. Not even close.
B
She had a narrator voice. That'd be pretty cool.
A
Okay, what's the interest rate on this car guy?
B
The interest rate on it? I believe it's somewhere within the 8 or 9%.
A
Okay. It's not good. You're not beating the market with this. Especially with the taking the account, the depreciation on the asset.
B
Well, hope my intentions were hopefully being able to fully, you know, refine. To refinance it under just my name. With the lower good.
A
What? You have 90,000 hours of bad debt. Your debt to income's insane. What refinancing are you doing? It's not like rates are good right now regardless, so. What the fuck are you talking about?
B
My credit score has gone a little higher.
A
Yeah, what's your credit score, Guy?
B
635, which is fair. I'm not Saying it's good or great.
A
You'Re not going to get a better interest rate.
B
Credit karma says otherwise.
A
Is it a guarantee rate or they'll pay you? Is it one of those? Or they're just selling you to apply.
B
To a credit so.
A
Exactly.
C
So for that car Toyota was supposed to get. Was supposed to get that payment from Honda, but they didn't. So he had to make like a double payment.
A
Oh, for sake.
C
So I had to lend him that 500.
A
You had to lend him money?
C
Yes.
B
That was only once, though. It's not like it was.
A
Come on. Is that not embarrassing?
C
It was that 520 like you just spent on that TV.
A
You call yourself a man?
B
I mean, that was just your child.
A
You're a boy.
B
I don't think so.
A
On what evidence do you have to provide otherwise?
B
You're able to get a house mortgage together.
A
Ha. What you provided, 50% of it was a couple thousand dollars. When it comes to getting into a house, that is pretty damn insignificant.
B
A couple thousand dollars within, you know, a month and a half, I think.
A
A couple thousand dollars of which in order to replicate the spending you still want to do, you just put on credit instead. So again, you really didn't do anything to get there. You just deferred where that money was spent and put. Shut the up. I have your spending. You spent double last month. And he made.
B
You know.
A
What do you think about that? I forgot about that part.
C
Yeah. That's spent eight.
A
Brought in four six. Four eight.
B
I thought it'd be a lot lower than that.
A
Oh, I'm sure you did. The guy that never looks at his accounts and is unwilling to communicate with his future wife about what is happening in the accounts. Yeah, I bet you would think that. Great. The day after you moved into your house, you got scammed for what?
B
That was the water softener, I believe. So we were pretty much moving.
A
He'll just get sold on anything. He'll just buy anything. What it. What. What did you do? What did you spend. What happened?
B
So the day of the move in, we're moving, right? We're helping the movers. It's hot. Was earlier this summer and just some guy in a freaking. What do you call those. Segway little thing. He was just like, hey, you know.
A
Like, usually when people show up with one of those, I shoot them. You let them sell you.
B
So he was just like, hey, man, you know, the. The water here in San Antonio or in Texas in general, it's hard, you know, it's. It's. It's hard water. So, you know, if you're interested in a water softener, I can throw in a garage opener. I can throw in blinds for the house, which, I don't know if you're aware, they do not come with new builds nowadays. So I was like, you know what? We can knock all three of those out, you know, in the day we move in. You know, what are you gonna do.
A
When a solar salesman shows up? Because they always shut.
C
No, they came.
A
Well, okay. And they turn them down.
C
No. So I'm watching him from my room on the ring camera, and homeboy is out there. Homeboy is out there. And they're like, we'll pay off your water softener. We'll do this, we'll do that. And I'm like, no texting him. Nope, don't do it, don't do it.
A
And did he pull up in a lime scooter?
C
I think they had, like, a little droid thingy, actually.
B
He had one of those hoverboards. Just throwing that, you know, just throwing that out there. It was a hoverboard, not a segue this time.
A
So you are a child.
C
Homeboy's like, yeah, we have an appointment with your neighbors. We can come back after since your. Since your girlfriend's not here or whatever. He's lying, saying, I'm not there. I come out and I'm like, no, we're good. Thank you. And he's like, but we can pay off this. Doesn't that sound good to you? No, the guy. The salesman, he's like, wait, doesn't that sound good to you? We'll pay everything off, and it's gonna lower your energy bill. And I'm like, no, we're good. He's still standing there like, ah. And I'm like, no, we're good.
B
And I was like, you know what? Maybe. Maybe that does sound good. You know, hey, we can pay off the. The water softener. If they're going to go ahead and.
C
Pay it off physically had to the house.
A
I'm not even kidding. He needs to go to his own separate therapy about consumer consumerism. He is so deep in the consumerism. It'll help the energy. Solar can be good, but it still takes, like 20 years for it to break even. Something like that. Often times you're in a sunnier place. Absolutely. But still. Still, it's brutal, man.
B
Well, at least I didn't get sold on that. But I did get.
A
Yeah, because she was there. What did you spend on the water softener?
B
I want to say it was like 52,5400.
A
What is wrong with you? I've lived in quite a few houses in Austin, Texas, and I've never had water softener. I don't give a f. That shit rolls off me. I don't care.
B
It was worth it. Our water tastes pretty good, actually.
A
Now take water softener. Isn't that just for the comfort of showering?
C
It's not for. They added a spigot to the sink, so that. Yeah.
B
And the fridge.
C
Well, that was ready.
A
And the fridge. They added water to the fridge. Yeah, that's that. That's. That already happens. Guy, you don't even know what you got.
C
I think he just loves getting scammed.
A
Yeah, no, he just. No, no, he. I. I'm totally serious. He legit needs to go to therapy. That focuses in the world of addiction. That focuses on his consumerism. I'm not even kidding. I'm not even kidding. This is in a similar vein with his actions in the world of. Or gambling. That's where he is in the world of consumerism. Getting sold on something or seen something anywhere. Seeing an ad, seeing someone he knows that has something he needs to get it, I think.
B
Well, speaking of gambling, I was addicted to price picks a couple months ago.
A
That is the least surprising thing I've heard all day.
C
He.
B
I was winning more than I was losing. Just putting it out there.
A
Well, you're gambling behind her back, right? Isn't that what you said? Or did you tell me that? I forgot. Even at this point in the conversation, someone told me something.
B
Yeah, I was. I was gambling behind her back.
A
And you found out?
C
Yeah.
A
How'd you find out?
C
Because he would brag about it afterwards, saying that he won more than he actually spent. And that time they give us.
B
What if they give us those referral codes? I would refer all my co workers and then I would get, you know, 50 to be able to gamble per co worker.
A
I just got another note. How the can you even get scammed at Buffalo Wild Wings?
C
That was also with his buddies with you.
A
What kind of scam even happens there?
B
So after a long day at work, me and, you know, my work buddies were like, hey, let's go to Buffalo Wild Wings drinks the worst wings.
A
Yeah, okay.
B
Yeah. So they get there before me. I was stuck in some traffic, whatever. I get there and there's a guy out there and he's just like, hey, you know, we're doing this thing for. For the kiddos.
A
Guaranteed. He was a head homeless guy.
B
He may have looked like it but so it was just more of like, hey, you know, we're doing this thing for the kids, buying backpacks, whatever.
A
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B
And it was like, hey, you can sign up for just 30 bucks. It was a donation. I was like, you know what, cool, maybe I can write that off in my taxes that I did pay this year. Here, buddy.
A
In no way are you doing your own deductions on your taxes. You are 100% taking a standardized deduction. What the are you talking about? If you even pay your taxes. But go on.
B
So I do pay my taxes now. But so anyway, so that I was like, cool, you know, here's 30 bucks, whatever. I go inside, do my thing there, and then come to find out they actually enrolled me in a subscription, a monthly subscription where $30 is taken away.
A
Just die. He will do anything and he laughs about it. He doesn't even. He doesn't give a. He thinks it's funny. Your joke's not funny. Cuz it's affecting our. It was just you. Yeah. You guys don't have kids, right?
B
No, no, no. Just two dogs.
A
Is it planning? Are we planning on the babies?
B
Not anytime soon. Until.
A
Okay, thank the. Because my goodness, you're a joke. Okay. What is this? Time investment. Never. I've never heard of this.
C
That is the water softener.
A
Oh. And it's called time investment. He laughs about it.
B
I mean it's the time invested in cleaning your wall.
A
You realize he thinks this is a joke.
C
I don't think he realizes like how much everything is.
A
No, I disagree. Actually. He said approximately how much bad debt he has. He doesn't give a. Because he was actually able to stay pretty darn close to the number. He doesn't care.
B
I do care. And I know that's what everybody says.
A
But you're laughing at it. You're giggling. You say you wouldn't take back the tv. What the are you telling me you care about? Show me you care. What can you say that indicates you care, guy? See it.
B
I want to make a difference in our relationship.
A
I'm glad you want to. Why have you done no actions that would suggest you do?
B
I think it just goes back to my behavioral right. My be. You know, just my behavior in general. That's what I need to change first to be able to.
A
Good general statement. Now let me ask again. Why haven't you then all talk, no action.
B
I just love the thrill of spending. That's why.
A
Exactly. And that's where he needs to go. To some kind of counselor that focuses in the world of addiction. Because he is chasing that dopamine release. You really are. And I'm not saying that. I mean it is objectively bad. Absolutely. But it is so much more prevalent today than ever. We are a more consumer driven culture than ever before. And it is okay. If you have a problem, you need to seek the help build on habits. Stop it for a couple months. If you do something for a couple months. A habit is A habit is built just budget for a couple months. And don't spend your money on bull. And you'd be already be in a better place. So you have $3506 50.59 on this with $53.68 of minimum is your minimum monthly payment. What's the interest on this?
B
10. 10%, I believe. I mean it Was worth it for the blinds and the garage door opener and clean water.
A
Your garage did not have a garage door opener. What the new build are you guys getting? I get the blinds. Yeah. Why would it come with blinds? You want to get the blinds that fit the style, the decoration that you're going to do. Yeah, that makes sense. Garage door opener. What the are you guys getting?
B
It's a Lenar home. So.
A
Huh.
B
It's a Lenar home. So most of those new buildings I've heard quite.
A
Isn't that the cheapest of the. Isn't that the carnival cruise of the home building industry?
B
I think it is but you know that was just my excuse. You know we're like hey we're moving in. Let's just take care of all this stuff.
A
Right.
B
Right then and there. You know instead of having to save up and invest.
A
Yeah. We get the garage door opener and you get some curtains that are a bit cheap for a while until you can afford it.
C
It.
A
Oh for say credit one this is an indicator of being someone with the worst finances possible. It's basically as bad as you can get. And I'll get, I'll get you set up with the FIZ cards, a debit card that builds credit certainly a lot better. And I also get you a course career certification so that we can get and hopefully a better paying job like you. You make pretty good money now but maybe we can get into one, a more moral field first of all. And two, something that where maybe your guys incomes are a bit more tied just because that helps the household. So I'll gift you both of those but credit one is going on with this card guy.
B
So that first credit card or credit one card was you know I was trying to take that first step into being able to build my credit back up again.
A
Go on.
B
So this all happened when I was living with one of my, one of my brothers. He's just like hey, you know, know as long as you're you know working saving money which I was not saving money. He's like you're, you're allowed to stay here. So I was like you know what, let me apply for some credit cards. Try to rebuild my credit. After this Dallas forward situation that happened with my ex girlfriend. So we had to get evicted from an apartment complex.
A
You've been evicted before?
B
Yeah.
A
We could not surprise.
B
It was a eighteen hundred dollar apartment.
A
Was your mortgage payment?
B
No, it was a.
A
What's your mortgage payment?
C
1416.
A
Not surprised you've been evicted. Look at how you live life. So you get onto a mortgage with someone who's been evicted in the past. Interesting strategy. Not a play I would have made personally.
B
I mean, it wasn't my fault at the time. Right. I believe I. I've had, you know, or money has played a big part in my relationships, including the past. But every relationship, it does.
A
Yes. That is a basic of relationships.
B
Who would have thought? Yeah, but in that relationship, I was the one that was trying to keep the boat afloat.
A
So there was no way that boat would stay afloat then.
B
Yes, there was no way at all. So we ended up just, you know, boot barn. Yeah.
A
$87.82 on credit one. I'm for boot barn. Is this one of those things you see on your friends? You got a pair of boots?
B
So not. Not that I do get work shirts from there. They have to be fire resistan. Lot of welding and torch in there.
C
The shirt that he's wearing from boot barn, that is not fire resistant.
A
Is that what this was?
B
No, that one was too.
A
What is wrong with you? First of all, because I know for a fact you had work shirts. There's no way you did not have work shirts. Yeah, that is a cope. Cope argument if I've ever heard one cope excuse. Credit one is bad for credit building regardless. Like, not for the credit building part, but because you have to pay fees every month anyway. You've paid 44.32 in fees on this card alone this year. Then total interest, $97.96 this year. And you're getting boot bar not paying it off. Borderline. Almost maxed out. Made a minimum payment 49. But then, guess what, the balance is now higher because of interest and fees and purchases. You're just. You're gonna be in debt forever, buddy. This takes four years to pay off, and it's less than a thousand dollars. Takes four years to pay off off. That is what you're dragging her through. So you're not getting married for at least four years. Great. Oh, my. This is the second card at one. What's going on with this card?
B
So on that one they had. It was on credit karma, where it was like, hey, you know, if you apply for this card and if you don't.
A
Listening to credit karma so much.
B
I don't know. I mean.
A
Why do you listen to literally everyone about everything except for her?
C
No, literally, that's what she said. I could tell somebody or I could tell him, hey, this guy's blue. And he's like, no, it's not. And then he comes back and he's like so and so from work said, this guy is blue today.
A
And I'm like, why are you with him? Because I wouldn't be for more than a half a day.
B
She loves me.
A
Why?
B
I think underneath all of the shitty finance decisions that I've had, there's a great guy in there.
C
I would like to say the good outweighs the bad. But like, like this financial thing, like he thought. I think he thinks that I was kidding about him getting his together, but I was not. So that's why I signed him up for the show.
A
I know. That's why we pulled our little exercise on him. Listen, and the fact that she in has already called out before this conversation, that you listen to everyone except for her, and then all of a sudden I see it and called it out independently, that is not a good sign. That should be a wake up call.
B
That's where I'm hoping that we end up heading towards, to be honest.
C
But if he stays in the mindset of I'm a man, then this probably he's a little.
B
She can't even grill, actually, whenever I did grill. Those hot dogs are amazing on a.
A
Flat on a black rock. You cooked it on a pan, guy. A large pan.
B
And it wasn't even the actual Blackstone brand.
A
Also, hot dogs come pre cooked. You are an infant. So on this credit one at least no purchases, but of course. $8.25 of fees, $10.44 of interest. Oh, it's borderline maxed out. $30 minimum payment. You owe $436.29, $40 of interest this year so far and fees of $33 at a 28.24 interest rate. And you sign up for every membership in the world. You got life360, so you can track each other's whereabouts. You. You got two gym memberships and you don't even go to the gym. They say car wash memberships that you never even use. What the fuck? Oh, and then you have another car wash membership. Dude, you'll get everything. There's not a thing in this world you will not get.
C
But he lies about those as well. He told me he canceled his gym memberships like three months ago. His car wash membership like three months ago. And he's like, oh, I need to do it. I need to do it. And I'm like, I thought you already did it.
A
Why do you even lie about that? What is the point?
B
There's no point.
C
Because he thinks I'm gonna get mad. And of course I'm Gonna get mad.
A
But I'm mad that you're lying.
C
I have an iPhone. He just switched recently because one of his friends had a galaxy whatever the.
A
So he said your friend have you wouldn't have to pay for life360 would have find my. Oh, I don't even know. Dude. What is this? Ally. Ally credit card.
B
Yes, that's another credit card.
A
Usually you see car loans with them, but. Okay. Ally credit card. Oh, it's maxed out good. 923.65. Oh good. $381 of purchases. You. That's funny.
B
That's not funny.
A
$14.88 of interest accruing this month so far. $27 minimum monthly payment. More boot bar and $107. Get it going in against the B.S. ross store. Senior burrow and more poop bar. You. It's for work. That is an excuse beyond excuses to just go to boot barn.
B
I like my pearl snaps, man. They look pretty cool. So.
A
Huh.
B
They're called pearl snaps. I mean this one's kind of wrinkly.
C
But they're called pearlies because they have pearls for buttons.
B
They're pretty pricey. So as you can see, you look.
A
Like a gay cowboy. No.
C
That's literally what I told him this morning.
B
Oh man. Definitely not the vibe I'm trying to go for. But if you say so.
A
This takes six years to pay off. So six years till marriage plus the.
C
Four on the other credit card.
B
That's 10. Hopefully I'll save by then.
C
I'm glad you can count.
B
No, but yeah, that's. That's really bad.
A
Bought a different TV on this credit card. A different TV on this credit card.
B
Before the current TV purchase.
A
How many TVs do we need? Dude, what is wrong with you? It is not funny. It is not funny.
B
That one was for my office. So.
A
Office? What office? Do you. What? What the are you doing in your.
B
Office, you little office slash game room?
A
So yeah, there it is. That's the real word. Your little goon cave. You jack off to Brokeback Mountain. I see you going to Bottom Barn for your shirts every day. 30 interest. Well done. Okay. Capital one. This looks like it is paid off every month. But it was only because it was like a $59 of purchases. But it still is money that could be going towards other debt instead of this. And it's going in and getting some bull from the gas station. Going to the Takiera La Tappy tea.
B
So from Michigan. So with that one, the plan was to just strictly use for gas purchase.
A
Well, the plan failed, you dumb.
B
And now I just have a bunch of. I'm addicted to zinning. I don't know if you know.
A
Well, no, yeah, that would be an addiction.
B
So I purchased. I don't know if you can see right there, $60 worth of zins a week.
A
The Takiara was Zins.
B
No, no, that's $60 a week.
A
So that 3100. You. Dude, you're spending. You're spending almost a full, full month's worth of paychecks on zins a year. Yeah. You're spending about three works, three weeks of pay on zins a year. Three weeks that you're doing of work is only to fuel your zins to pay for your sins.
B
Can I say I'm.
A
No, you're. You're an endless addict. You're an endless addict. There is nothing you don't get addicted to. If you. If you try it. You need to. I have an addictive personality. So I know to keep myself away from things. I don't drink because I know I would fall down that rabbit hole. I don't do a fun little drug because I know I would fall down that rabbit hole. I don't pop us in, even though I'd be locked the in because I know I would go down the rabbit hole. Okay.
B
That's literally the only thing.
A
And I know I have to personally, not that like it's necessarily bad or something like that. I know I have to tell myself not to goon off to something because I know that my personality could fall down that rabbit hole if I did. I have to keep myself away from stuff. I don't gamble because I can fall down that rabbit hole. You should know this. It is clear as day with your past gambling, now this and everything you're doing. You will fall down more if you accidentally stumble upon something and you have to keep yourself away. You have to be self reflective and more self mature to be able to live a healthier life and keep you away from stuff. And it isn't just impacting you anymore. It impacts her too. $60 of zins a week. Thoughts on that?
C
Lady, I think it's a waste. And he started because one of his friends at work did it.
B
I mean, to be fair, it does help you lock in. Just saying.
A
Yeah, until your threshold's met. Then you only have to go up. No, no. Keep it in your pocket. You addicted. Disgusting. Yeah. I want you to feel the withdrawal. You disgust me.
C
So that restaurant La Tapatiya is down the street. From his work. So I could pack him lunch and he will still go and spend it on here.
A
Why?
B
You know, sometimes I'm not craving the leftovers, so.
A
Sometimes, as in every time. Is there always leftovers?
B
There's always leftovers.
A
No. Is the lunch that is packed always leftovers? No.
B
No.
A
And you're going to what?
C
So he'll go to La Tapatia.
A
I've never even heard of La Tapatillas. Is that a chain?
B
It's a chain in San Antonio.
C
There's another Mexican restaurant he goes to, and it's kind of like a Mexican. Mexican hooters on his lunch break.
A
Mexican Hooters?
C
Yeah. And he'll go on his lunch break.
A
They serve in low riders.
B
They don't serve in low riders. They're just in, like, I guess, mini skirts or something like that.
C
Scandalous.
A
Okay. They. They do that at regular Hooters, too. What makes it a Mexican Hooters?
C
It's like a Mexican restaurant.
B
So it's a Mexican restaurant?
A
Yeah.
C
He gets. It's his.
A
It's like a white castle, but instead of the castle part, there's just a big wall at the top.
B
No, there's not. They're just in, I guess, I don't know, hoochie suits or whatever. I don't know.
A
With browner skin. I don't understand. How's it a Mexican hooter? Okay. Okay. Sure. I don't get it. I don't know what makes up Mexican hooters.
B
The fajitas are.
A
Do the fajitas instead of wings. Okay. That would make sense. Okay. Okay. So they hope that you see tits on your way to having diarrhea in the bathroom. Yes. Understood. Good. Gotcha. 30% interest on here. Oh, you were lying about the amount of Zen you were taking from her, they're saying. Or at least the amount that you're spending on it. Is that right? You didn't know it was that much a week?
B
Yeah.
A
He was misleading to a different number.
C
Yeah, I thought he was.
A
Why even just say that? Be open about your struggles. If you have a struggle, like a.
C
Puck or two, like a week, and he's doing like a puck or two a day or something like that the wrong with you? Yeah. And it's very like, I can quit when I want. I can. I can quit.
A
So why don't you want to, though?
B
It just helps me looking at work, you know?
A
Yeah, but. Yeah, it does. But, buddy, your threshold's here. You could have that not as sufficient, but with, like, coffee or, like a zero Calorie energy drink or something.
C
He's also addicted to coffee.
B
Yeah.
A
Okay, well that's a. So that's. That's okay. Most of us are. I have a coffee right here. If I don't have it, I have a headache and I'm tired. Yeah, that. Okay. I mean, how many milligrams of caffeine are you drinking a day? Is it more than 400? The Daily recommended cap.
B
It used to. I've come back. I've come.
A
But you replace it with zins.
B
Yeah. Which isn't. You know, which isn't healthy.
A
Okay, Indigo, what's going on with this?
B
So that was actually. It's a credit card on that one. The same thing. Just miscellaneous purchases on that one.
A
Okay. Forty dollar minimum depayment balance of. Looks like this is. No, it's not. Paid up every month. No interest is charging fees to. Charging. It's a monthly fee. Credit protection fee for. It's so ridiculous. You're a.5 months to pay this off. That's how low the balance is, yet you still won't. 171.44 tit. Dude, what is wrong with you? 35 interest for some of it, 24 for the rest. Ridiculous. 126 of fees this year so far on this car alone. Meaning you likely had a missed payment because that doesn't add up to 122. If this is your monthly fee of $5 times the seven months we had, that's 35 you5 had $126 of fees this year so far. You've had late payments. There's no way you haven't.
B
I believe I. I have.
A
Remember when you said. He literally said I've never been laid.
C
On a payment before.
A
Are you talking about. You lying piece of. You lying piece of shit. No.
B
I. I guess I did have. I mean obviously, right? The. The facts are showing that I've had two. Two late payments.
A
But the facts are showing that just two. Oh, maybe. May the be I don't know. But you're a liar and I can't trust anything. You're insane. Milestone. What's up with this? It looks like the same card. Honestly.
B
Yeah, they are. They're. They're. I guess backed by the same bank.
A
Great. Well, this one is 353.90. Minimum payment of 40 purchases of zero. But monthly fees, monthly interest, $10. That fee. Oh, yep. About like about two to three late payments on this one this year so far as well. And she doesn't even know. What a joke. You should Be disgusted. Good luck on the way home, buddy. Because I'm borderline giving up at this point. Good. Affirm. Let's have an affirm. Tool over. Get at it. What is wrong with you, man? $137. For what? Cove Smart. What is Cove Smart?
B
That's the security system we got for the house.
A
Yes, because I'm sure people are just breaking into Yalls homes left and right. Is wrong with you? Let's say it's like a 25 minimum monthly probably. Stupid. Here's a mortgage. Now you guys are on this and you split it, right?
C
Yes.
A
Rate 4.4.65. When did you guys get this? Two months ago we moved in. Good rate for that. How'd you guys get such a good rate?
C
I have good credit.
A
Yeah, but for good credit, this is still lower than you'd normally get.
C
First time home buyers. I am bonded by myself. Also.
A
$188,199.44. Oh, he's not on it. He's not on the mortgage. Oh yeah.
B
I was not able to.
A
That's okay. I feel much more safe about this then. Good, because you. $1,416.51. So I am okay with this. This. You didn't correct me when I said you guys were on the mortgage together before my minimum monthly payment of a thousand. $416.51. And he provides what, 40 or something right now?
C
So right now he gives 50 because we make about the same.
A
Oh, you make a little more. Well, actually. Well, I mean, I have before taxes. I have your after tax. Yeah, so maybe not. He would have probably brought you right up.
C
We actually couldn't get it with him.
B
Yeah, it was 10. 10 or 15 points.
A
Now you have 430 that you just spent on Home Depot and that's your new balance.
C
So that one's also in my name. And we're gonna do that in half too. He applied and got denied.
A
29 minimum month. What the. Dude, this keeps going. This keeps going. And what are we buying at Home Depot? So much. And why'd you even need a credit card? Why didn't you have cash if you had to open one? Why?
C
I didn't want him to have to owe me because I could have paid it out without. Right. Cash.
A
Because you don't trust him to pay you back.
C
I do.
A
Then why didn't you want him to have to owe you? Because he still does. To pay for half the credit card?
C
Yeah.
A
So it's the same thing. That doesn't make sense.
B
I think for that one. Well, we just. We ended up getting, I believe just lawn care tools. It was a lawnmower, weed eater. And we also.
A
Oh, 33, 882 to student loans.
B
Yes.
A
For your what degree?
B
No degree.
A
Right.
B
I believe I have like 122 credit hours and no degree.
A
How long were you in school?
B
I started in 2013 when I graduated. So I was in school up until 2018. So it was like six, seven years and no degree on that.
A
The F. Are you with. Why are you accepting this? You want him to be the father of your children? I don't know. I don't get it. Listen, you're on an income based repayment which honestly you, you don't even deserve. You make good money. You should be forced to pay at least $350 to what your minimum monthly payment should be on a 10 year standard plan. Okay, like you. You do not deserve this. You are not someone that needs an income driven plan. It you. All the money that should be going to this that we have lent you as the public you are spending on and we're allowing you to do that. And it's unacceptable and disgusting. This is so stupid. You had a late payment on your student loans?
B
Yeah, honestly, that one. I, I did. I didn't even know about it. I think it might have been before the, the plan that I had set up.
A
Oh, man, I don't know. Ah, this is. I, this is. I, I don't. This isn't a budget problem. This is just his behavior. This isn't a budget problem. This is a. He's degenerate and he, he embraces it and he thinks it's funny. Thousand hours in this checking account that's halfway decent moving money some back and forth. Okay. Yeah, nothing crazy was happening there. Okay. And then his spending account. $358. So it's an apple bill. Cash app. Cash app. So sending money to her.
B
Yeah, that's sending money to her for the bills.
A
Sometimes guys have a checking account join. You don't just transfer in.
C
He was having trouble linking the, the. The PNC to.
A
Dude, I'm so done with you. Went in, got some sins. Cash app. Cash app. Brevity. Teriyaki Liquor. Bueno Flux Lore. Oh, it's just all spending. It's all spending. It's all, it's all moronic Lids. Locker room ous lids. Max.com. oh, cash app. Cash app. Bully Make Amazon City based Cinema. Amazon Spotify, BJ's Restaurant, Brevity 6 Boot Arm, Boot Barn Bottom, Barm Chick Fil A Dutch Bros Taquiera Lata PIZ Me House Cash App Apple Bill Subway Cash App Overnight Toast Overnight Toast Overnight Soap what the is wrong with you buddy? They're pretty good fabletics. Dutch Bros I'm sorry. I'm sorry. This is. I'm not making a budget for you because this isn't a budget problem. And I know some get upset when I don't make a budget, but this isn't a budget problem. It's as simple as that. You could budget this. I know for a fact with your income and your minimum payments, you could budget it. It's a little tight, but I'm guessing you have about a thousand hours left over. Maybe $500. This isn't a budget problem. Plus you guys are confined so it's weird and confusing anyway. This is you having an addictive personality, not willing to address it and not willing to hold yourself back. You to need therapy and you need to work on your cope spending and your inability to say no. You need to grow the up, stop being a little boy and you need to respect your partner and actually focus on not hiding and cheating behind her back. And stand up like aing man for the first time in your life. What a joke. Hammer Financial Score Join us in the post show. I know there's always more especially with a couple sick. It's so dumb. Just subscribe to Hammer only link below. Join us for an extra 20 minutes. Now I'm done. Pull out your phone right now. Open it. She doesn't even trust you to give you that. How long has he been lying to you?
C
I'm gonna assume the whole time we've been together.
B
That's insane.
A
Who the would marry someone that endlessly goes behind her back and cheats?
C
I hate him so much.
A
Elusive Members Content Click the link in the description or pinned comment below and watch thousands of hours of extra and uncensored content.
Host: Caleb Hammer
Date: August 15, 2025
Guests: Scott (29, railroad carman) and Kelly (his girlfriend, curbside manager at HEB)
Location: San Antonio, Texas
This episode is a raw, revealing deep-dive into the tangled financial—and emotional—relationship between Scott and Kelly, an unmarried couple recently co-purchased a home. At the center: Scott’s secretive spending (including a recently hidden TV purchase), his “addictive” consumer habits, mounting personal debt, and the shocking lack of transparency that’s threatening their future together. In a dramatic podcast twist, host Caleb Hammer brings in Kelly mid-episode for a candid confrontation and real talk about what’s really going on, how it’s eroding trust, and whether marriage is possible in their current state.
With equal parts tough love, humor, and serious financial scrutiny, Caleb exposes not just the numbers, but the dysfunctions and addictive patterns that sabotage both their finances and relationship.
Host’s Reaction:
“So you’re just aware that a calendar exists?” (04:19)
Memorable moment:
Scott: “I mean, it’s my money. I mean, it’s our money. Sorry.” (11:19)
Scott’s Debt: About $90,000 in non-mortgage debt. Includes:
Debt Management: Payments frequently late, “minimums only” on cards, accruing substantial interest and fees (84:13, 84:22).
Overspending: Last month Scott spent about $8,000 despite bringing in less than $5,000 (16:40, 59:21).
Purchasing Habits:
Host’s Blunt Assessment:
"You are an endless addict. You need therapy for your consumerism and addiction to spending…” (80:07)
Notable exchange:
Caleb: “Do you feel like she has to treat you like a child?”
Scott: “No. I mean I don’t think I’m a child.”
Kelly: “Is he… he’s over 18 so that makes him an adult.” (39:04–39:47)
Host’s Take:
“You guys have overcomplicated this before moving to the next step. Absolutely.” (40:01)
"I bought [the TV] right next to her without telling her."
– Scott, 19:06
"Why the f*** are you guys getting a house together when you can't even communicate finances? That makes no sense."
– Caleb, 10:27
"One of the leading causes for divorce in this country—it’s not great to have that flaw before even getting to the married part."
– Caleb, 11:05
"I just love the thrill of spending. That’s why."
– Scott, 68:25
"If you have a problem, you need to seek the help, build habits, stop it for a couple months... You could budget this—this isn't a budget problem. This is you having an addictive personality not willing to address it.”
– Caleb, 90:34–91:30
"[He’s] consumer cultured... you just have to... get individual therapy on potential addictive tendencies and cope spending around that consumer culture."
– Caleb, 48:21
"I just don’t know what to believe anymore. I don’t... This is why we went to counseling."
– Kelly, 26:31
The episode is a blend of direct, sometimes brutal honesty (from Caleb), gallows humor, and sincere attempts at intervention. Scott’s consistent downplaying, laughter, and rationalizations stand in stark contrast to Kelly’s seriousness and the host’s exasperation. By the end, the primary takeaway is clear:
This is not a household cash-flow issue—it’s a behavioral problem rooted in addiction, denial, and a lack of respect for both money and partnership. Therapy, not budgeting, is the only path forward.
If you haven’t listened, this is a cautionary tale about the intersection of unchecked consumerism, financial secrecy, and relationship strain—and how buying a TV can reveal everything that’s broken under the surface.