Financial Audit: "Pathetic Brat Thinks She’s Hot Sh*t"

Host: Caleb Hammer
Guest: Micaela, 23, Starbucks Supervisor, Seattle
Date: March 14, 2025

Episode Overview

This episode of Financial Audit features Micaela, a 23-year-old Starbucks shift supervisor from Seattle. Caleb Hammer dives deep into Micaela’s finances, personal spending habits, and underlying emotional/psychological patterns driving her financial decisions. The main theme revolves around overspending, living beyond one’s means, and the disconnect between wanting financial improvement and actually making the necessary behavioral changes.

The conversation is lively, direct, and at times confrontational, with Caleb holding nothing back as he pushes Micaela to confront the realities of her situation—her mounting debt, self-admitted entitlement, and how her choices undermine her relationship, goals, and future.

Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Background and Income Realities

• Work & Earnings: Micaela is a shift supervisor at Starbucks in Seattle, making about $23.64/hour, averaging ~30 hours a week, with tips bringing her monthly average to ~$2,400–2,700 (04:01).
• Work Scheduling: She desires full-time but cites lack of transportation and store preferences as limiting her hours (01:28).
• Public Transport/Lifestyle: Cites Seattle public transportation as “a little unsafe,” uses Uber/Instacart for convenience (01:33, 42:16).

2. Spending Habits & Overspending

• Chronic Overspending: She admits to routinely spending more than she earns, with last month’s spending topping $3,526 against $2,700 income (04:31).
• "Treat Yourself" Mentality: Micaela identifies as unable and unwilling to stop spending on indulgences, treating herself, and “having fun”—even when it’s at the expense of her financial goals or relationship (04:25, 05:13).
  • “I can’t stop spending. Treating myself, having fun.” — Micaela (04:25)
• Denial and Minimization: Downplays how much she’s actually spending and often guesses much less than the real number, appearing shocked at the actual totals.

3. Debt & Financial Products

• Credit Card Reliance: Multiple store and generic credit cards, often over the credit limit (Ulta, Mercury, Mission Lane, Credit One, Plus One).
• Buy Now, Pay Later: Frequent heavy use of Klarna, with $1,054 balance, used for both groceries and non-essentials like coach purses (36:00, 47:57).
• Personal Loans: An Upstart loan was taken to escape a difficult living situation (69:03).

4. Rationalizing and Emotional Triggers

• Justification for Spending: She repeatedly justifies purchases as “worth it” for her happiness, self-image, and “hobbies” (25:41).
  • “It’s worth it to me. Like, not as much as I love my boyfriend, but it makes me happy.” — Micaela (25:41)
• Points & Rewards Delusion: Clings to Ulta’s points as justification, not realizing the actual math is heavily negative due to high interest (31:56).
• Addictive Patterns: Describes shopping (especially at Ulta) as “addicting,” owning up to habitual, emotion-driven consumption (26:39).

5. Relationship Tensions and Goals

• Marriage Ultimatum: Her boyfriend refuses to propose until she gets her finances in order (05:13).
• Living Together: Despite poor financial habits, cohabiting and sharing expenses; two-year lease recently signed (05:30).
• Misaligned Priorities: Caleb forcefully points out that her spending is repeatedly chosen over her relationship goals.
  • “You are choosing Ulta over him.” — Caleb (17:05)
  • “You are choosing your desire for sweet treats over your engagement.” — Caleb (54:03)

6. Historical Context & Excuses

• Past Trauma: Recalls a controlling/exploitative ex-boyfriend who stole from her and had drug issues. She links some of her financial disorder to this period, but Caleb challenges her to stop using old pain as an excuse for current choices (10:03, 13:54).
• Repeated Justifications: Attempts to evade responsibility by referencing past victimization, but Caleb pushes for ownership of current actions.

7. Reality Testing and Wake-Up Calls

• Math of Debt: Caleb walks Micaela through the actual costs due to interest, showing how purchases end up being several times their price.
  • E.g., $40 makeup item ultimately costs her $283 with minimum payments and accrued interest (22:15).
• Minimum Payments Trap: She repeatedly claims she’s staying on top of payments, but the reality is she’s continually maxed out and paying mostly interest (40:13).
• Budget App Intervention: Caleb demands she use his budgeting app and classes to start confronting reality (21:06, 48:56, 73:45).

8. Structural Obstacles

• Transportation: Not driving (by choice/anxiety), relies heavily on Uber/Instacart—greatly increasing regular expenses and financial inflexibility (01:31, 42:16).
• Housing Instability: Past moves, odd living arrangements, and a strong desire for autonomy complicate her cost structure and budgeting.

9. Mindset, Entitlement, and Resistance

• Self-Described Entitlement: When confronted, she blurts out:
  • “Well, I’m, I deserve it. I’m worth it.” — Micaela (00:25, 40:48)
• Deflection and Blame: Attempts to blame enabling by her boyfriend, then admits it’s ultimately her choice (44:47).
• Refusal to Change: At several points, openly states she doesn’t intend to stop, even with increased knowledge.
  • “If you saw you were over the budgeted limit for Ulta on a monthly basis… would that stop you?”
    “No, it wouldn’t stop me.” — Micaela (29:11)

10. Future Prospects and Planning

• Career Goals: Wants to become a wedding planner, but Caleb notes her financial instability makes this currently impossible (59:29).
• Action Plans: Caleb offers certification and budgeting support if she’s willing to follow through. He insists actual behavioral change—not just education—is needed (81:02).
• Bleak Projections: At minimum payments, some credit cards would take 6–9 years to pay off, with no discernable savings or investment path (62:43).
  • “Nine years until you can get engaged. How does that feel?” — Caleb (62:43)

Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• "I can't stop spending. Treating myself. I just... I deserve it. I'm worth it."
  — Micaela (00:16, 00:25, repeated throughout)
• "You spent $800 more than you brought in last month… so obviously, you give more of a shit about sweet treats than the marriage."
  — Caleb (05:38)
• "You are choosing Ulta over him. You're choosing your beauty over your guys being together."
  — Caleb (17:05)
• "No, you're over the credit limit, you dumb tits. That's what I am saying."
  — Caleb (18:04)
• "Are you willing to spend $208 on it? ...No. Well that's what you're doing because after the interest accrues... mathematically, that's what you're paying."
  — Caleb (21:50)
• "The damage isn't done. You're doing the damage every day. The damage is endless, man."
  — Caleb (24:01)
• "Why even be with him? ...That is why, put him through that?"
  — Caleb (40:50)
• "You're making it worse. ...You are going to be, at 25:30, battering down the hatches because of the hurricane you have created right now being a spoiled brat."
  — Caleb (45:46)
• "You are not worth it to your life."
  — Caleb (41:55)
• "You're a child. I'm borderline done with this conversation... It's so stupid."
  — Caleb (66:40)
• "I'm just young and having fun."
  — Micaela (57:52)
• "No, you're not. You're 25. Almost."
  — Caleb (57:53)
• "If you're happy with this life, you're never going to change. But you should not be satisfied because your life is not good."
  — Caleb (45:42)
• "You can't afford a dog. It's irresponsible for you to have a dog."
  — Caleb (77:06)

Timestamps for Key Segments

• Income & Job Overview: 00:46–03:44
• Overspending Admission: 03:54–05:13
• Boyfriend/Marriage Ultimatum: 05:13–06:18
• Excuses & Backstory: 07:04–13:54
• Ulta & Debt Math Game: 17:05–24:36
• Buy Now, Pay Later & Klarna: 36:00–40:04
• Financial Therapy and Entitlement: 40:48–45:42
• Shopping Addiction Discussion: 25:41, 26:39
• Budget App Intervention: 21:06, 48:56, 73:45
• Living Situation and Transportation: 01:28, 42:16, 43:09, 79:48
• Drug Use & Spending: 78:09–79:38
• Bleak Financial Projections: 62:43
• Wrap-up & Reflection: 73:07–End

Overall Tone & Reflections

This episode is a stark, unvarnished portrait of financial self-sabotage, enabled by a powerful mix of consumer culture, emotional insecurity, and entitlement. The host’s tough love approach, peppered with mockery, exasperation, and humor, attempts to strip away excuses, force accountability, and ignite some form of wake-up call in Micaela.

The key takeaway for listeners: Changing your financial life requires more than desire or knowledge; it demands brutally honest self-reflection, the willingness to break addictive patterns, and concrete, consistent discipline.