The Dumbest Guest In Financial Audit History

Summary

Podcast Summary: Financial Audit – "The Dumbest Guest In Financial Audit History"

Host: Caleb Hammer
Guest: Maya (29, Riverside, California, Insurance Agent)
Release Date: February 11, 2026

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Main Theme

This raucous and combative episode of Financial Audit sees host Caleb Hammer audit Maya, an insurance saleswoman from Riverside, CA, who claims to be "doing fine" financially but exposes layers of denial, poor money habits, enormous debt, and unusual coping mechanisms — including witchcraft rituals. The episode takes listeners on a rollercoaster as Hammer attempts to confront Maya’s contradictions, get a straight answer about her finances, and dispense tough love in his trademark blunt style.

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Key Discussion Points

1. Maya’s Employment & Income

• Work: Insurance agent, relying on commission, monthly and annual bonuses.
• Income Explained: Attempts to dodge specifics, but eventually pegs monthly income at ~$6,200 before annual bonus, which averages $6,000/year. 2025 earnings decreased from previous years.
  • "(In 2025) I probably made $92,000 (before taxes)." — Maya [08:01]
• Location: Riverside, CA — moderately high cost of living.

2. Budgeting & Money Management

• Budgeting Method: Budgets twice a month, per paycheck, with no real grasp of fixed vs. variable costs.
• Hammer’s Critique: Points out budgeting needs a baseline — “Your rent does not change based on how much you get paid. How does that work?” — Caleb [05:07]
• Financial Tracking: Maya cannot consistently track her spending, income, or debt.

3. Debt Denial & Rationalization

• Debt Amounts: Claims she’d like to always keep ~$2,000 in "rotating" credit card debt, but actual debt is $62,000+ besides a large mortgage (over $420k).
  • “How much debt do you have today?” Maya: “Um, I don't know, I would say like 30.” / Caleb: “Your debt right now outside of your mortgage is $62,203.72.” [16:46]
• Justifications: Insists not possible to be debt-free, and maintains running balances help "keep her credit alive."
• Snowball Method: Claims to be using it but consistently adds to debt, spends far more than pays down, and misapplies snowball principles.

4. Spending Habits

• Travel: Takes expensive international trips 3-4 times/year, including upcoming $9,000 Europe tour for her 30th birthday.
• Shopping: $2,437+ on one credit card for Christmas, thousands on TikTok Shop, mobile games, and witchcraft supplies.
• Family Gifts: Buys elaborate gifts, says "it felt more important" than paying down debt.
• Burger King, Uber Eats, TikTok Shop, online games, body oils for rituals, and more populate her statements.
• Coping Mechanisms: Distracted by retail therapy after grandfather’s death.

5. Home Ownership & Real Estate Choices

• Mortgage: $4,220/mo — about 70% of average income, requiring financial help from two tenants ($1,700/mo when they pay).
• Housing Issues: Lacks sufficient down payment, pays for expensive mortgage insurance, has additional home-related debts (appliances, solar panels, water filtration).
• Tenant Policies: Will not rent to women, claims "men are easier," and does little to no background checks. Finds tenants via Facebook Marketplace and travel nurse sites.
• Host's Take: “You couldn’t afford this mortgage.” — Caleb [19:02]

6. Witchcraft & Magical Thinking

• Magical Rituals: Practices money spells/rituals; brought one to the episode to "clear her debt."
  • “Any time I use a money ritual, I always ask for just my bills to be paid.” — Maya [27:25]
  • Hammer ridicules this reliance, says she needs to change behavior, “be an adult.”
• Family Tradition: Witchcraft "runs in the family"; describes haunted house stories and living with ghosts.
• Host: Refuses to allow witchcraft ritual in the studio.

7. Health, Insurance, & Self-Perception

• No Health Insurance: Claims inability to afford even minimum coverage ($211/mo quote disproves her $400+ claim).
• Fat Acceptance: Refuses to acknowledge medical obesity; Hammer pushes back against “fat acceptance” and stresses health risks.
• Life Insurance: Four policies, including one (sold by mother) used for down payment on home — poor investment, high fees, minimal benefit, much less than if money had been invested in the stock market.

8. Major Financial Red Flags

• Car Purchase: New Kia on 84-month term, purchased same day as home.
• Zero Retirement Savings.
• Missed/Late Payments, Huge Fees, Hundreds in annual interest charges.
• Savings Account Almost Empty.
• Habitual Overspending & Self-Sabotage: Justifies big spending due to "special occasions" or emotional hardship.

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Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

On Not Knowing Her Own Finances

• Caleb [02:05]: "Usually, lady, we can't have a conversation on Financial Audit if I do not have a number. Come on, you know that."
• Caleb [07:42]: "How can you even say that overall though?... You literally can't even tell me what you think you made this year. What the [bleep] is wrong with you?"

On Debt Denial

• Maya [13:06]: "Look, I don't believe that you, you can possibly be debt free."
• Caleb [14:28]: "I was going to vibe with you a little bit... but then when you say it literally might not be possible, I think you're kind of literally broken."

On Magical Thinking

• Maya [26:45]: "Yeah, so actually I brought a spell... to assist me with clearing up this debt."
• Caleb [28:09]: "Proud of you for not actually doing anything."
• Caleb [29:24]: "If you are going to make money to off your debt, you are going to earn money. You are going to budget your way through it. You're going to change your behavior. You're going to be an adult."

On Home and Tenant Choices

• Caleb [19:02]: "If you bring in $6,200 a month on average, that's 70% of your income, dummy. That's not affordable, dummy."
• Caleb [31:11]: "You won't rent to women?"
• Maya [31:16]: "Men are easier to deal with than women."
• Caleb: "This sounds very sexist and very generalizing of half the human population."

On Gifts & Overspending

• Caleb [42:39]: "Why is that more important than your entire future and the goals you're trying to do for yourself?... What the [bleep] are you buying for?"
• Maya [45:24]: "Because I wanted to."

On Health & Denial

• Caleb [36:17]: Explaining health risks and pushing back against denial of obesity and health danger.
• Maya [36:45]: "Yeah, that's why I don't have health insurance. Cuz I can't afford it."
• Caleb [37:10]: "Girl, you make $90,000 a year. You can afford health insurance."

On Financial Reality

• Caleb [62:51]: "Not traveling. Snowballing. Shut up. People can't live debt free. Shut up. Not fat. Shut up. You don't know what you're talking about. You don't live in reality. Shut up."
• Maya [62:58]: "I don't live in your reality."
• Caleb [63:00]: "I'm just in reality. What am I saying that is not real?"

On Life Insurance

• Caleb [80:46]: "Yeah, but it's shit savings because you would have more than double by the end... if you were just investing in the overall market."

On Car Financing

• Caleb [84:56]: "The day that you signed up that thing that is 70% of your income, you went and got a car payment. I don't even know what to do."
• Maya [86:04]: "I needed a car."
• Caleb: "Shut the [bleep] up. Could have got a $10,000. I don't even want to hear it."

On the Title and Final Assessment

• Caleb [68:50]: "It's the most guess. Can that be the title? Yeah, financial audit's most guess. We might get canceled for it, but I think that is the actual title."
• Final Hammer Score:
  • Spending/Budget: 0/10
  • Debt: 2/10
  • Emergency Fund: 1/10
  • Retirement: 0/10
  • Real Estate: 5/10
  • Overall: 2/10 [Approx. 91:45]

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Key Timestamps

• [01:04] Maya’s Job & Flimsy Income Details
• [07:56] Cannot State Her Own Yearly Earnings
• [13:06] Debt Denial – “Can’t be debt free”
• [16:46] Actual Debt Revealed: $62,000+
• [18:04-19:02] Mortgage Payments Exceeding All Financial Guidelines
• [26:45-28:29] Witchcraft Ritual for Debt Relief
• [42:39] $2,400+ Christmas Credit Card Binge
• [58:13] $9k 35-Day Europe Trip for 30th Birthday
• [70:01] “It was the cheaper option” – Paying payment plan fees/interest
• [76:46] Whole Life Policy Sold at Age 16
• [86:04] Buying New Car & House Simultaneously
• [91:45] Final Financial Hammer Score

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Flow & Tone

The tone is brutally mocking, confrontational, and peppered with dark humor and expletives. Caleb Hammer is unrelenting: he’s exasperated by Maya’s evasions, incredulous at her denial, and openly ridicules her reliance on spells, poor investment decisions, and lack of accountability. The guest is largely defensive, sometimes laughing, sometimes defiant, exhibiting the same avoidance and magical thinking that landed her in trouble.

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Summary for Listeners

• Maya’s story is a marathon of financial missteps: high income squandered by lifestyle inflation, staggering credit card debt, travel addiction, magical thinking, and little to no investment in her own future.
• Every “solution” adds to the problem: Witchcraft, gifts, spending justifications, and enabling by parents all keep her in a harmful loop.
• Hammer’s takeaway: You can’t spell your way out of math — only real behavioral change, budgeting, and discipline can dig you out of a hole. The solutions are simple, not easy — but nothing will help if you refuse to accept reality.

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This episode delivers a cautionary tale wrapped in savage comedy, underscoring the dangers of denial and magical thinking in personal finance.

Transcript

[A]

To watch episodes of Financial Audit a week earlier, Check us out on YouTube. While I'm being told you need an additional 2,500 hours in spending money to go across.

[B]

That is the goal, yes.

[A]

And how are you doing that?

[B]

My dad's giving me 500 spoiled enabled.

[A]

Disgusting.

[B]

Very much so.

[A]

You'll never get anywhere in life.

[B]

Called being blessed.

[A]

No, it's called getting enabled.

[B]

You look like a giant man, baby.

[A]

But I mean, like, you won't rent to women.

[B]

Men are easier to deal with than women. I would love to do the spell so we can go ahead and assist me with clearing up the step.

[A]

Thought about killing my. Something big is coming. Something that's going to change personal finance forever. And the first 500 members get to lead the charge. Go to Dollarwise.com to change the future.

[B]

Hi, I'm Maya. I'm 29 and I'm from Riverside, California. And this is Financial Audit.

[A]

Thanks for coming over to the place where everyone from California is coming.

[B]

Yeah, House.

[A]

At least we get to send you back. What do you do there in Riverside, California?

[B]

I'm an insurance agent.

[A]

Okay.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Selling.

[B]

Selling.

[A]

Are you a good saleswoman?

[B]

Well, that depends on the economy because people right now are not buying cars.

[A]

Are not buying what?

[B]

They're not buying cars. People aren't buying.

[A]

Is that true?

[B]

People are not buying cars right now.

[A]

Actively. True.

[B]

Well, it feels true because I'm not getting sales.

[A]

Well, okay, which would then lead me to my next question. What do you make?

[B]

I would say I'm not getting quotes, actually, because I am getting sales, but I'm not getting as much quotes as I'm used to getting.

[A]

Okay.

[B]

So that's why I say that people aren't buying cars.

[A]

What do you make in your job?

[B]

It varies because, you know, I know it varies.

[A]

It's commission, blah, blah, blah. We all know this. But what do people usually say when it varies? Like when I was a commission salesperson, I averaged it out.

[B]

It's because.

[A]

Sorry, starting heated. Just. What's average? What's average?

[B]

Well, it depends because there is. There's. It's not just commission. You know, I have monthly bonuses and then I have an annual bonus, so it's.

[A]

Okay, take a. What's the annual bonus?

[B]

It also varies.

[A]

Oh, for sake. Usually, lady, we can't have a conversation on financial audit if I do not have a number. Come on, you know that. You know that. Are you really going to come on in the first two minutes? Sorry again. Started heated. First episode back. I didn't sleep very well last Night from the new year. But how in the world do you think you can have a conversation on financial audit in the first couple minutes? If you can't give me a number.

[B]

I can give you a number. But I'm telling you that it will change. It will vary. I mean like, average it out.

[A]

Please, please take away the annual bonus. Average out what a normal month looks like or a normal quarter. An average normal quarter.

[B]

A average month. Taking away the bonuses would be the.

[A]

Annual bonus because the bonus.

[B]

Well, the monthly bonus is also something I would need to take out because that also varies. That can.

[A]

No shit average. Are you stupid? Do you not know what averaging it out might?

[B]

I understand what you're saying.

[A]

Does it really go from $5 a month to 500,000 hours a month? Is it that big of a gap?

[B]

For the monthly bonus it can be.

[A]

From $5 a month to 500,000. You've made 5 and 500.

[B]

I've made 25 and I've made a thousand.

[A]

Uh huh.

[B]

And bonuses and monthly bonus.

[A]

Huh? And that thousand, is that more common than the 25?

[B]

No, but the 25 is also not common.

[A]

Name something a woman might drive a man to do.

[B]

Kill himself.

[A]

Okay, what's common?

[B]

200. $200? Yeah. $200. So I would say. No, the. For the monthly bonus. Yeah, but average monthly. I guess we can put it at. I guess we can put it 6200 with the monthly bonus.

[A]

Okay. In this annual bonus, what did you get this year?

[B]

I'm not sure yet. The numbers aren't closed yet.

[A]

Last year.

[B]

Last year was 6,000.

[A]

The year before that?

[B]

Year before that was 10,000.

[A]

The year before that.

[B]

The year before that was. 6000 again, the year before that, 4000.

[A]

Okay. Looks like it's about 6000 a year is what we can get. Okay, right? Does that sound about right?

[B]

If that's the average number you want.

[A]

To use, it sounds like you're shooting right around there.

[B]

Okay then fine. Yeah, sure. That's the number then.

[A]

Well, this isn't my decision. That's just like. Okay, is that. Okay, so 6200amonth, right? Is that what you said?

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Is that. I think we can average her out there. We don't even know. My goodness. Five minutes in, you're gonna be one of those people where you can't give me a number. Oi, oi. How do you budget then? If you can't. If you can't even establish what you think an average is to average it out on a monthly basis for how much you need and whatnot. How the do you budget, if anything?

[B]

I budget twice a month. Every time I get paid. I base it on you budget per paycheck.

[A]

So you get a paycheck and then you budget? No, no, no. A budget is where you're. You have a baseline budget of minimum requirements that doesn't change based on how much you get paid.

[B]

That's how I do it. You ask me how I do it, but that does. That's how I do it.

[A]

Okay, but how does that make sense then? Because your rent does not change based on how much you get paid.

[B]

No.

[A]

So what the are you talking about? How does that work?

[B]

So for my paycheck that I get on the first of the month, I budget out the bills that I have to pay from the 1st to the 15th, and I budget out from that check to what I have to pay. And then on the 16th when I get paid again, I budget out the bills that are due from the 16th to the 31st and I budget based off that.

[A]

Okay, so the year isn't fully closed out, but 2025 sales are estimated to be slightly higher at a 2% year over year gain in auto sales. Q. You might just be better job. And the year before that was 2023 to 2024 was an increase. Yeah, positive. Year over year growth from. Went from 15.1 million units to 16. Gotcha. So I think that is your job and your skills at it.

[B]

Well, the problem that is going on right now is that rates went up. So it's harder to sell when rates go up.

[A]

Yeah, but everyone's required to get car insurance and people are getting the cars. It's not an option. But rates go up. What do you mean like rates go up? They still have to get insurance. This isn't health insurance.

[B]

They'll just go buy a cheaper insurance company that barely covers them and anything like that.

[A]

Go work for that insurance company if you're in a failing market.

[B]

I would not go work for a crappy insurance company.

[A]

But if you're in a failing market that the, that the people are. That the market is not choosing, why would you stay there if you're going to fail?

[B]

Because I'm not failing.

[A]

What you were just kind of explaining it to be okay, did you make more money this year than last year or less?

[B]

Less. It's the first year that I've ever made less. It's the first year I've ever made less.

[A]

Okay, sounds like a bad direction to go in.

[B]

Well, for the last 10 years, it's been Increasing. So great.

[A]

Sounds like you hit your peak. But you're already explaining that your company is selling a product that the market is not demanding as much as the other product at another organization of which you could work at. If you're actually skilled at sales, why would you not go? Why? The business isn't entitled to have you. I'm confused why you feel like you have to stay there.

[B]

I don't feel like I have to stay there. I choose to stay there.

[A]

But why if you're making less?

[B]

Because it's. I love my boss. It's a great boss.

[A]

Who cares?

[B]

I care.

[A]

So what'd you make this year? Not including the bonus, that'll probably be about six. Maybe a little less.

[B]

I don't know.

[A]

How do you not know if you are able to tell me you made less this year than last year?

[B]

I know that I made less than this year.

[A]

How? But you don't know the number. What's wrong with you?

[B]

Because my commissions were less this year.

[A]

How can you even say that Overall though?

[B]

Because I based it off the checks that I get this.

[A]

You literally can't even tell me what you think you made this year. What the is wrong with you? How can I have a conversation with you, dude?

[B]

You want to give? Okay, I probably made 92,000.

[A]

Before taxes or after?

[B]

Before.

[A]

Okay. Oh, you don't want to leave cuz your mommy works there?

[B]

No, my mom's retiring. She's leaving there.

[A]

Nothing with her. Or don't. I mean if it's 90, that's decent. Where is Riverside? Is that LA?

[B]

It's in between LA and San Diego.

[A]

Okay, so it ain't cheap. No, it's a beach town. No, no, it's in the desert, it's.

[B]

Hills, it's in the valley.

[A]

Is it expensive?

[B]

Yes.

[A]

Yeah, but everyone thinks where they live is expensive. Is it actually?

[B]

Yes, it is expensive. I mean California.

[A]

So in comparison. Yes. Yeah, but is it California expensive? Cuz 90. 90 could pull. Potentially. All right. Okay. So how you doing in Riverside? You look like you're probably a mother of like seven with multiple dads, right?

[B]

That's horrible. No, I don't have any children.

[A]

You look and smell like it.

[B]

What does that even mean? How does one look like? And how does one smell? Like a mother.

[A]

Whatever you're wearing smells like it's trying to cover up last night's alcohol and this morning's cigarette.

[B]

Don't smoke cigarettes. And I also wearing in perfume.

[A]

Yes you are. You're wearing something. Maybe it's your deodorant.

[B]

Then maybe it's my hair cream for my curls.

[A]

Yeah, it might be the cream you put in your hair. Yes.

[B]

Yeah, that's it.

[A]

I don't wear perfume, so it smells like baby mama. Like career baby mama. Okay, but you're not.

[B]

No, I don't have children.

[A]

I was asking.

[B]

Was that a question?

[A]

Yes.

[B]

I don't think that was a question.

[A]

It was a question based on, like, an assumption. Well, yeah, I mean, I was asking if my assumption was correct because everyone I know that resembles this.

[B]

What do you mean?

[A]

This you that looks like you and smells like you usually results in that. So approximately $88,575 a year is the midpoint where half households earn more, half earn less. In Riverside, California households, though, that's not individual pay. So you're doing well for Riverside. You're above. You're in the top half of households alone without even a child. Surprise, surprise. Are we sure about that?

[B]

I'm 100% positive.

[A]

Okay. Okay. So how you doing then? If we know you're making pretty okay for Riverside, no children, allegedly. How are you doing in Riverside, lady?

[B]

I think I'm doing fine, but I just need to pay off some debt so I can be better, that's all.

[A]

So you're doing fine. Why are you in debt?

[B]

Because life happens.

[A]

Okay? That's not an answer. Why are you in debt? Let's try this again. Remember you're on a podcast. I'm going to remind you about that.

[B]

I made decisions. I've spent some money, and that's why I'm in debt.

[A]

I oo vague poster. Okay. Is this what you like online? You just vague post. You give absolutely no context for anything that's happening. You spend some money. We all do. What the is going on in your life? What are we talking about?

[B]

Look, my way of spending.

[A]

What is your way of spending? Let's try that.

[B]

I like to spend money on things that fill my.

[A]

You are just. Can you give me anything, dude? Anything more? Not vague. Endlessly. I spend my money on things. Things that bring me joy. What do you spend your money on, dude? And this is what got you into debt?

[B]

I spend my money on traveling. I spend my money on.

[A]

Where are you going? How much are you traveling? What are you doing?

[B]

I've been to the Maldives. I've been to Thailand. I've been to different parts of Mexico, traveling.

[A]

These are expensive trips, not Mexico. I mean, that's relatively close to you, but still can be expensive for sure. But Philippines and all that. Or Thailand, whatever. Which one One of those. Thailand, Asia. Yeah.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Okay.

[B]

I spend money. On which.

[A]

How much are you traveling? This is. These are expensive as trips.

[B]

Like how many times a year?

[A]

Oh, goodness. How often? How often? This is. Oh, this is going to be a teeth pulling conversation. Yes, sure, if that's how you want to answer it. How many times a year are we traveling?

[B]

Three to four times a year.

[A]

What the is wrong with you? How, how can you. Well, actually again, you make halfway decent income, but if you're going into death war, what's even the point? What are we trying to do? Are you single? Yeah. What are you trying to do?

[B]

Just live my life.

[A]

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[B]

Trying to enjoy life.

[A]

Do you care about debt?

[B]

Well, I don't really believe that you can be debt free.

[A]

Like, well, how is that, what do you even mean by that? Because obviously people are debt free. So what do you mean people? You don't. How. What does that even mean? What does that even mean?

[B]

Look, I don't believe that you, you can possibly be debt free. Like, I don't have that.

[A]

I've already heard you say that. So what does that mean?

[B]

It means that if you stop using your credit, you're going to ruin your credit. You have to constantly be using it. So in an ideal, that doesn't mean you can't be. I didn't say that you can't.

[A]

You just said. I believe people can't be debt free.

[B]

I just don't believe it's necessarily true because there's going to be a mortgage, there's going to be a car loan, there's going to be a.

[A]

Doesn't have to be. Doesn't have to be. Doesn't have to be.

[B]

So, hey, you're just never going to do anything.

[A]

There are people, I don't even advocate for full debt free. But like people that follow Dave Ramsey's program. Yeah, there's tens and tens and tens of thousands of people that have gone through those programs that are completely debt free, including Their house? Yes.

[B]

I don't think it's necessarily true.

[A]

You don't think it's true? Like, how do I even talk with that? What do you. You don't think it's true because somebody.

[B]

Would consider being debt free, like just having like a thousand dollars on a credit.

[A]

No, that's not debt free. That is debt. Are you. I'm confused. That is a balance on a credit card that would equal debt. What do you be. You think people that go through it as debt, you think, okay, well, those people are stupid. We don't need to think about those people. But you think the people that go through Dave Ramsey's program have a thousand dol. On a credit card and they don't consider that debt?

[B]

I don't know what. I just don't think it's a real thing. I don't think it's possible. I don't think it's possible for you to be debt free. And that's just. I don't think it's a thing.

[A]

I was going to vibe with you a little bit when you said, well, maybe it's not smart to be completely debt free because, you know, we should use credit cards. And credit scores are important and can be good for apartments. It can be good for, you know, future car loans, potentially like 0% deals, 1% deals. It can be good for finessing, you know, maybe 0% furniture for like three years. It could be good for a variety of things, especially a mortgage. We could vibe with that. But then when you say a literally might not be like, literally might not be possible. I think you're kind of literally broken.

[B]

No, I just think like, in my ideal world.

[A]

Your ideal world? That's not what's possible. Your ideal world and what's possible are very different things.

[B]

In my ideal world it is. I would have at least $2,000 of credit card debt, always.

[A]

Well, that's. With what limit? Like what the. Does that even mean?

[B]

Just counting around the 2000 on my credit cards just to keep my credit.

[A]

And what would the limits be on all your credit accounts? Yes, your credit cards, let's say, well.

[B]

That the max limit on them is like, what, 20,000, 12,000, 11,000, 10,000.

[A]

What did you have now? So you're talking about the ones you already have now?

[B]

Yeah, I'm talking about the ones I already have now.

[A]

Okay, so you have those big limits and your ideal world would always be have 2000. That is accruing. Interesting.

[B]

No, just bouncing around on my credit card.

[A]

Bouncing around. What does that mean to You.

[B]

Because I have so many credit cards, I would be bouncing the debt from, like transferring.

[A]

Transferring?

[B]

No, not transferring.

[A]

What is bouncy?

[B]

Well, I'm trying to explain that to you, but you keep cutting me off. Maybe if you listen.

[A]

No, it's because I'm trying to listen, but the words you're saying aren't just like, they're not real financial terms. So I'm trying to understand what you even qualify, what you're trying to say. So they're bouncing around.

[B]

So I would have $2,000 on one credit card. I'd pay that off and then it'd go. I'd charge another 2,000 on a different credit card.

[A]

I'd pay that off every single month.

[B]

Yes. Just rotating the credit cards to always have at least 2,000 on there.

[A]

I don't know why the 2,000 number specifically? Because you can keep them open and alive by spending like a buck on each card a month.

[B]

The 2000 is basically two vacations.

[A]

Okay, so it's to fund what you want.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Okay. And how much debt do you have today? Um, not including the mortgage. I know you have a mortgage. Chunky ass mortgage, by the way. But not including the mortgage.

[B]

Um, I don't know, I would say like 30.

[A]

You literally just said you want to cycle 2000 and you're just guessing on your debt. Let's see how close you are. 30. Okay, so I mean, it's more than double. So how can you even tell me your plan, your desire, what you want to be is 3,000 or 2,000 hours bouncing between cards. If you're literal debt right now outside of Your mortgage is $62,203.72. So what are you talking about? That doesn't make any sense. You're not in that world. You're only going up in debt. I would assume usually you wouldn't be allowed on this show. Unless that's the case. So what the are you talking about? That's your plan? What are you doing there to get that to be that? That doesn't align with anything you're doing.

[B]

Well, that's the lifestyle that I've always had. What?

[A]

What, what is the.

[B]

Having just the $2,000 in credit card. But what happened was the mortgage and I had to readjust to having a mortgage.

[A]

But that doesn't make any sense. So you got a mortgage you couldn't afford. Why'd you get the mortgage? What's nothing wrong with you? You don't even have children. Then you wouldn't be readjusting. There's no. Readjusting. What do you mean, readjust?

[B]

It's readjusting my additional spendings.

[A]

What are you talking about, though? If you could afford the mortgage, what would you be readjusting?

[B]

Like, my spending on, like, eating out and like, my.

[A]

Why does that change if it's something you could afford?

[B]

Because I can't afford to eat out as much because of the mortgage.

[A]

That doesn't mean you can afford it. Then what was your rent percentage? Your needs should still only be about 50%. Sure, it's California may be a little higher, but you have a strong income even on a slow year. So still, it should be about 50%. You should still have 30% for fun. What the. Are you cutting back on eating out? What you should, by the way, anyway, because the only thing you're probably adjusting is the waistline.

[B]

Actually, it doesn't change.

[A]

Well, that's not good either. So instead of just adjusting for your mortgage, you should be adjusting your fast food down regardless. Most likely for health reasons. But besides that, this doesn't sound like something you can afford if you have to cut back from that percentage of fun anyway.

[B]

It's just an adjustment that I'm not used to. I'm used to being able to spend money whenever I want, however I want.

[A]

This doesn't sound like something you can afford then.

[B]

Bet it is. I can afford it fine.

[A]

What's your mortgage?

[B]

$4,220.

[A]

Well, what the are you talking about? If you bring in $6,200 a month on average, that's 70% of your income, dummy. That's not affordable, dummy. Your entire living expenses should be 50%, maybe 60% because of the state you live in. But again, you make good money in a low. In a. You make a good income even in a low year.

[B]

I also have tenants.

[A]

Well, think. Because I don't know. That's 70% of your life. 70 of everything. That is not a mortgage you can afford. And even with tenants that will supplement you a little bit here and there. But what about expenses when they pop up, like something needs to be repaired? What about when one of them moves out? What's their. What's their lease terms?

[B]

It's month to month.

[A]

Okay, see, there you go with one of them. Just. Well, how many tenants do you have?

[B]

Two.

[A]

Okay, so it's so easy for them to just leave if it's month to month. Hmm. They're just out. Then why? You can't afford that. 70%. Good. The fuck. Especially when you include all your extra debt payments on Top of that. That has to be, like, 100%. How do you afford utilities? How do you afford gas, car insurance, food?

[B]

It's all covered.

[A]

No, your debt has only gone up, which is, I think, the real answer. What do you mean it's all covered? Your debt has gone to. What was it, 62,000 from revolving? 2,000 hours a month. What are you talking about? And what happens when a tenant fails to pay?

[B]

Well, that has happened. And, I mean, it was tight.

[A]

Well, we know your debt's only gone up, so I don't think it's just tight. I think you're.

[B]

Well, when he did move out, yeah, it did get a little hard, and I had to use my credit card from time to time.

[A]

Oh, yeah. So what do you bring in from the tenants on a monthly basis?

[B]

1700.

[A]

And what was your mortgage again?

[B]

4200.

[A]

1700. When they pay, that's still 40%. That is still on the chunky top edge. And that's if they pay.

[B]

But that's because of the mortgage insurance that's on there.

[A]

Well, maybe it sounds like you couldn't have gotten the house because you didn't put enough down. Had to refinance.

[B]

I have to refinance to get rid of the mortgage insurance.

[A]

That's. Or you just get a 20% equity. Or you just pay off your mortgage insurance.

[B]

Yeah, that's a lot.

[A]

Refinancing's a lot. That costs money. You might get baked into the loan, but then you're extra. You already can't afford this. If rates have gone down enough from where you're at to even make refinancing make sense. Not minimum 2%.

[B]

Not right now.

[A]

Then what the. Are you talking about refinance?

[B]

I said I need to.

[A]

Have you gained that much equity in your house? We're refinancing. We get you at a 20 equity position.

[B]

No, I don't think there's enough equity.

[A]

PMI. Are you getting rid of.

[B]

That's what I was told by my realtor advisor that he was, like, the only way.

[A]

Realtor advisor? What is a realtor advisor? An advisor to your realtor.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

What? Actually, yeah, you had an advisor to your realtor who talked to you about refinancing your house, but you just don't understand when and where and how.

[B]

So there's my realtor. Oh, right.

[A]

Yes, you have a realtor. Very good.

[B]

And he has an advisor.

[A]

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[B]

Type in code Caleb, don't ask me that's his.

[A]

I am asking you because that's how.

[B]

He runs his business. That's not my business, that's his business.

[A]

Well, it's impacting your business that is your entire life because that's the person who advised you to be with your house. But go ahead, continue.

[B]

No, he just told me in regards to when I was closing the loan and everything that that was going to be on there unless I refinanced or of course that I had finance refinance.

[A]

When you have an equity position it's to you having equity gained and there.

[B]

Has been some equity gain and I'm just waiting for it to keep going up. It's just waiting for it to keep going up.

[A]

Let's find the out.

[B]

But it's something I need to do. It's not something I'm doing right now. It's not something I'm working on because it's not possible right now. But it is something that I need.

[A]

Mortgage insurance is not going to be what makes or breaks your 70%.

[B]

It's another income dollars. Huh? It's another thousand dollars a month.

[A]

Yes, your PMI is a thousand a month.

[B]

The mortgage insurance is a thousand a month.

[A]

You didn't send us your mortgage statement. What the is wrong with you? Yes, I did type in your address. Lady gonna jump around the are you talking about? If it's a thousand hours a month it should be damn paid off almost immediately. You're incorrect. I've heard 7% rate. Okay. Total not do. Let's see how's that broken down? It's 200 bucks a month. What is wrong with you? You have no idea what you're talking about. Did the advisor tell you this?

[B]

No.

[A]

So what the are you talking about? You sent a statement. You're able to look at a statement? Why are you so broken?

[B]

Honestly, I didn't read that.

[A]

Then how the can you confidently tell me a number on based on the.

[B]

Numbers that I was given when I closed the loan.

[A]

What numbers were you given when it closed the loan to make you think it was 1,000 hours a month? So no.

[B]

That gave me the the breakdown of the full payment.

[A]

I have a full payment right here, you tit. So I don't think refinancing is honestly really going to save you much money, if anything at all. You have. You have an 8.5% equity position in your home. 8.5%. You're not getting to a point where it'd be 20%.

[B]

I told you it wasn't I.

[A]

So what are you talking about then?

[B]

It's just something that needs to be done in the future to help.

[A]

Why Your PMI will probably be paid off by then.

[B]

I don't know. I'd have to look at it when the time comes.

[A]

What? You don't look at anything. You didn't even know what you were saying.

[B]

So I don't look at my mortgage statement every month.

[A]

Yeah, but you told me how you would save money.

[B]

It was based on what? The numbers I saw when I closed the loan. The breakdown that they gave me on my mortgage payment and how much goes to mortgage insurance and how much is my rate and all that stuff. And that's what I base it off of. That was the number that stuck in my Head.

[A]

And then you also said something weird before I cut you off because I just needed to get information. You said you spend money on like witchcraft or some of something stupid.

[B]

Yeah. So actually I brought a spell. So I would love to do the spell so we can go ahead and assist me with clearing up this debt.

[A]

Yes, sir. Thought about killing myself. I don't think that's what's going to actually do it. So you.

[B]

What do you mean? I mean I brought everything.

[A]

Like, hey, has that helped you yet?

[B]

Well, to be fair, yes, because this is a money ritual spell that I brought. And so with this money ritual, usually when I do a money ritual, I always ask.

[A]

It has never worked. Your money has gotten worse.

[B]

Anytime. Let me finish.

[A]

Uh huh.

[B]

Anytime I use a money ritual, I always ask for just my bills to be paid. I never asked for additional stuff. I always just ask for the bills to be paid. This is a specific money ritual where I'm going to be asking for a specific amount of money, which is to clear up my debt.

[A]

Why don't you just, you know, do work?

[B]

I do work.

[A]

That's all that's required. Doesn't smell like anything.

[B]

It's chamomile. Smells like chamomile.

[A]

Okay, very good. Proud of you for not actually doing anything.

[B]

It does. Do something.

[A]

Because again, why don't you actually just go do shit?

[B]

I do do shit. This is another way to help. It's an additional support. Like I said, I've never asked for a specific amount. I've only ever asked for my bills to be covered.

[A]

Why don't you go earn a specific amount?

[B]

I do earn a specific amount.

[A]

Girl, I'm not gonna. We're not doing rich witchcraft in my studio.

[B]

Why not?

[A]

This is what I think of your witchcraft. Oh, you.

[B]

You're a disrespectful.

[A]

Absolutely. We're doing that shit here. I'm not allowing that bit. What do you mean?

[B]

I mean thankful. Thank you for sprinkling me in chamomile. There's nothing wrong with that.

[A]

Yeah. You look great.

[B]

I know. It's amazing. I'm a fairy.

[A]

I'm not allowing it. I know you wanted to do a little bit. You. Why not? I'm not having you do a witchcraft in my studio. It's not happening.

[B]

There's nothing.

[A]

I'm not having the studio tainted with things I don't even understand.

[B]

It's not tainted.

[A]

I'm doing that. If you are going to make money to off your debt, you are going to earn money. You are going to budget your way through it. You are going to change your behavior. You're going to be an adult. Instead of trying to find some shortcut through witchcraft, you stop being a D. Shortcut.

[B]

It is support. And who threw it at me?

[A]

You're damn right. So because I'm not having that shit, I'll take some childish for that. But you're going to be an adult going forward and you're going to get your shit together like a real.

[B]

My shit is together. All right. And witchcraft.

[A]

Up. You lose tenants left and right. Sometimes they don't even.

[B]

I do not lose tenants when left and right. It was one don't even pay.

[A]

How long have you owned your house?

[B]

Two years.

[A]

Sometimes they don't pay rent.

[B]

It's only one tenant.

[A]

Yeah. That's still big. And you can't afford that. And your debt only goes up. You spend your money on traveling four times a year. What the are we talking about? Obviously none of this makes sense. You are not act.

[B]

Doesn't make sense to you cuz you.

[A]

Haven'T looked at anything. You're acting like an adult in your life.

[B]

What is an adult? You. What is. What is the definition of being an adult?

[A]

1. You couldn't afford this mortgage. You got on a mortgage that was 70% of your income. That's.

[B]

I pay it.

[A]

Well, you pay it with PMI. Meaning you didn't even put enough down honestly.

[B]

And 3.5 is what it was required?

[A]

Yes. That doesn't mean it's good for you. What do you mean? If someone offers you meth on the side of the road doesn't mean it is good for you. Just because it is there for you to take.

[B]

I mean you could take it and then resell it and then it is good for you because then you make some money. No.

[A]

Then shut the up.

[B]

You're the one who brought up math. I'm just going with your example that you gave.

[A]

Yeah, but you're taking it in a stupid direction. I'm just saying because something is available doesn't mean it is good unless you.

[B]

Use it for good.

[A]

My goodness. How is this logic so broken to you? I don't understand. This mortgage is likely something that is. How's your relationship with the tenants?

[B]

Good.

[A]

Okay. And how long has the shortest tenant been there?

[B]

He's been there six months.

[A]

Okay, we'll see. Month to month. People are usually in and out. Well, kind of. See, and you got to find someone instantly. And Even still, it's 40% of your income. Again, I don't believe that. You don't have children, but I'm glad you're at least taking care of them.

[B]

I don't have children.

[A]

Exist. I'm being told you don't even always do background checks on them?

[B]

No.

[A]

You won't rent to women?

[B]

No.

[A]

Why? Are you trying to get a little bonus here or there?

[B]

No, they're just. Men are easier to deal with than women. I have experience with tenants being women, and it's horrible. Experience.

[A]

This sounds very sexist and very generalizing of half the human population.

[B]

It's been my experience. So that's.

[A]

Yeah. With how many?

[B]

Five different women that have rented from you?

[A]

You said you've only had one. That was a failure, so. What the are you talking about?

[B]

So I lived with my mom, and my mom rented rooms, and I assisted her with those tenants.

[A]

Okay. Were you guys doing background checks? You don't even do background checks now. I think that would be the failure of you as the landlord.

[B]

That wasn't the landlord. My mom was the landlord. Those are the female tenants.

[A]

And were you doing background checks?

[B]

Was I. No.

[A]

Oh, my gosh. Okay, so you're going to blame it on them being women?

[B]

They were only the women that we were having issues with.

[A]

I love to be sexist for fun as much as everyone else, but you're being right now. What do you mean?

[B]

It's just the truth. It's what I've experienced, and I went based off of my experience.

[A]

Okay, so how do you get your tenants now?

[B]

I have the website set up through. What is it? Travel for Travel? Nurses.

[A]

So it's people that really are going to be in and out.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Oh, for sake.

[B]

I have that website set up, and then I have the Facebook marketplace.

[A]

Ever gotten weird with any dude?

[B]

Nope. I have security cameras and guns.

[A]

Yeah, but you also seem like, again, someone with, like, 50, 50, like, men that have birthed children inside of you.

[B]

That's so weird for you to say that.

[A]

I guess. And then that's fine.

[B]

You look like a giant man baby. But I mean, like, man baby.

[A]

What would that even mean?

[B]

You look like a child, but you look huge. So you look like a man baby.

[A]

Look like a child how?

[B]

You look like a child. You look like a giant land baby. You look like somebody stuck a face of a. Of a baby and put it on a child. Like a man baby.

[A]

Baby face.

[B]

No, Baby face and man baby are two different things.

[A]

Huh?

[B]

Baby face and man baby are two different things.

[A]

Explain man baby to me because I explained how you look like a horror earlier. So explain to me how I look.

[B]

Like you really didn't explain that.

[A]

Explained it with the smell. Everyone knows the smell. The smell.

[B]

I still don't know what you mean by the smell. It's not an experiment.

[A]

Smell your hair and you'll get it again. It is the smell that whores wear when they're covering up from the cigarette in the morning. And the alcohol from the previous day doesn't smell like shampoo. No, no, no, no, no, no.

[B]

It does smell like shampoo and curling cream. That's what it smells like.

[A]

So what are we doing then? If you don't care about your future, then why? Why? What are we doing? Because there's no point of sacrificing.

[B]

We're just living life.

[A]

No, but there's no point.

[B]

And I just want to enjoy living life.

[A]

Ok, that's a different show.

[B]

But I just want to enjoy it the way I want to enjoy it.

[A]

How do you want to enjoy it.

[B]

With only having $2,000 of debt?

[A]

But there is no point of sacrificing the sacrifice that is going to be required if you're not going to live a long life to enjoy it.

[B]

But I'm already enjoying it.

[A]

Yeah, but you're not. If you want to get to the $2,000 a month and pay off this. What was it? I forgot how much debt it was. But like tens of thousands of dollars of debt, you're not going to be enjoying life for a good long while in order. So what is the point of this large sacrifice that is going to be required, that we've all gone through those that have been in bad debt like I was and I got out of there before. Oh my gosh. Okay, great.

[B]

This will be my third time, unfortunately.

[A]

Well, that's even worse then, actually. But what's the point of going through all the sacrifice? You probably just took shortcuts like last time, like you just tried to do with your magic spell. But what is the point of this hard sacrifice, long sacrifice that will be required for this better life if you will not be long around to see it and have the energy to be able to participate in it?

[B]

How do you know what kind of energy and how long I'm gonna live?

[A]

Because you're fat. So that means you're gonna die earlier and your energy levels are gonna be less.

[B]

I don't know.

[A]

Yes.

[B]

Don't think so.

[A]

Science does.

[B]

Grandparents died at 99.

[A]

Okay, how fat were they?

[B]

Don't know. I don't. I don't partake. I don't. I'm not checking people's BMI like you do. I'm not over here doing that for every person that I meet.

[A]

Yeah, but that is very dependent on the, the statistical likelihood of long life. Your grandparents, it doesn' related to them if their lifestyles were good.

[B]

No, their lifestyles are horrible.

[A]

How do you know? You just said you weren't checking.

[B]

Just. I wasn't checking their weight.

[A]

You couldn't tell if they were fat when you looked at them.

[B]

I told you I'm not fat. So that already gives you the description of what I think that is.

[A]

You know you're fat though, right? No, no, I need to be very clear. Like it's not joking roasting anymore. Like I need to be very clear. For the sake of health and sake of everyone out there, you cannot think that this is considered normal.

[B]

I'm not fat. I'm not skinny. I'm not fat.

[A]

You are. You. You are fat. This is not an insult. I want to be very clear.

[B]

I understand what you're doing.

[A]

We cannot do fat acceptance. It is not okay.

[B]

I wouldn't consider you fat either, girl.

[A]

I'm obese.

[B]

Wouldn't consider you fat.

[A]

How do you know what's good for me? That's my opinion. It doesn't matter what you do. Science does. It is not healthy. We are not going to live long lives. My energy levels are not as good as other people. My resting heart rate is not as good as everyone else. I am more susceptible to high blood pressure and diabetes. So are you. These are not good things. And I can. This is not the point of this conversation. But the fact that we got down it. I need to be very clear and it is important for those watching. Accepting this as not fat is just not the real world. That's not the real world. And that is not okay. It's not acceptable and it is not healthy or normal.

[B]

What do you want me to tell you? I'm not fat.

[A]

I was hoping maybe you'd kind of come around and be willing to try to live. Just whether or not you live a healthier lifestyle is up to you. But to just accept, accept this as healthy is kind of unacceptable.

[B]

I never once said healthy. I just said I'm not fat and I'm not skinny.

[A]

Now that we're just on the topic, I just, I really can't allow people out there to. The fat acceptance movement has led to deaths and horrible health insurance premiums for all of us.

[B]

Yeah, that's why I don't have health insurance. Cuz I can't afford it.

[A]

Oh my goodness. Oh, that Means you also could not afford your mortgage. If you can't also afford your health insurance while having tenants with the mortgage, you cannot afford this house.

[B]

I couldn't afford health insurance when I didn't have a mortgage.

[A]

Then you definitely could not afford getting a house if you couldn't afford health insurance.

[B]

Health insurance is really expensive for me.

[A]

Girl, you make $90,000 a year. You can afford health insurance.

[B]

No.

[A]

Yes. A few hundred dollars a month for like the minimum basic care, catastrophic coverage. Yes, you could.

[B]

I can just go to tj.

[A]

What?

[B]

Tj?

[A]

Max?

[B]

Tj? No. Mexico. Tijuana. It's an hour and a half away.

[A]

I have an affinity for Mexicans. They're like my favorite people. I love Mexico and I just get.

[B]

My medical gun there.

[A]

Not. What is. They're not flying you to Tijuana when you have a heart attack because you're a fat, lying.

[B]

You drive.

[A]

You're not driving an hour and a half when you have a fat heart attack in a decade. Ok. No, I'm saying in an emergency you get in a car crash. In an emergency, you have a stroke. In an emergency, you have a heart attack. A heart attack. I'm talking about catastrophic things.

[B]

Yes.

[A]

Yeah. You are not going to Tijuana.

[B]

If I have to.

[A]

Yeah. No, no. Oh. Oh, you're broken. Oh, you need health insurances to go see a mental health person. You. You. Can you not comprehend what I'm saying right now? You will be rushed to an emergency room and you will be well.

[B]

If I'm rushed to your emergency room and I'm. I'll just go to Mexico afterwards.

[A]

You. I don't know what to do with you. What is this brain? What is this brain? What? I just want to clarify. You don't believe it is. So you say it's impossible for people to be debt free when I have $2,000 of debt at all time. You're not fat and you don't need health insurance. So these are the four pillars of truth that you are basing your entire life on right now?

[B]

Yep.

[A]

So, Lindsey, this is Riverside, California. This is. This is what they teach out there. I mean, the desert between.

[B]

No one really. No one teaches you finances out there.

[A]

Well, no one teaches finances anywhere. To be very clear.

[B]

Okay. So glad you asked what they teach out there.

[A]

Okay. All right. And I know from the notes you've also like, just. Just like you buy crazy and like, at one point you literally just spent 800 bucks just in one. Go on. It's like. And you're telling me you can't afford health insurance. You. How much do you spend in one month? I have the actual answer, so don't lie right now.

[B]

Yeah, 200.

[A]

You're telling me you can't get catastrophic health insurance coverage?

[B]

No.

[A]

You smoke too much. You have gone.

[B]

I do not smoke too much. I have dropped down a lot on how much we smoked.

[A]

If you're able to watch this back and comprehend what is happening right now, I need you to do you realize you smoke too much? You have lost it?

[B]

I do not smoke too much.

[A]

Okay, keep saying that and we'll see if that makes it true. Let's search your state. How much would catastrophic health insurance at the lowest price possible in California cost for a 29 year old overweight woman who makes $90,000 a year before taxes? Let's shop some rates, shall we? I just. I'll never understand fat acceptance. There's minimum plans by county covered California publishes them.

[B]

Covered California screws up your taxes.

[A]

It publishes minimum plan premiums by county though. I'm not saying you sign up for and do all that. Lowest minimum shows $211. That's through Kaiser HMO coin. I'm just talking so you don't get in an emergency. That's $211 I. E $11 more than you spend on a monthly basis. And you're telling me you can't get health insurance? You, you're being a responsible child.

[B]

I quoted through Kaiser and I came out just 400 this.

[A]

You dumb tit.

[B]

I did a personal quote with Kaiser and it came out to four.

[A]

Yeah, I'm talking about catastrophic coverage. Dude, you sell insurance for a living.

[B]

You have no idea.

[A]

You're talking about.

[B]

I don't sell medical insurance.

[A]

You just don't know what the you're talking about. You know you can get, you can go through different, oh my gosh, third party platforms and whatnot. And California is very helpful when it comes to health insurance. Okay, what do you think your financial score is? 0 to 10. 0 being absolutely horrible. 10 being absolutely incredible.

[B]

I think I'm like a good 6, 6, 7.

[A]

I hate you.

[B]

Thank you.

[A]

If you want your financial score, get [e-mail] see where you stand in the world of money. It is free. Only takes a few minutes. You see where you're doing well, where you're doing poorly. What you need to do to improve will help you. So take it for [e-mail] and if you don't want to be like a guest who ends up on the show, obviously you're going to need a lot more than this for this type of guests. But make sure you download the dollar wise budgeting app. New features being added every single month. It is literally incredible with tens of thousands of monthly active uses for a reason who are changing the life enjoying them. Sign up for the free trial. See if you like it. Most people take the annual version because it saves about 50 and when you do only through March. I will personally sign my budget friendly cookbook mail directly to your door. After March, it's gone forever. Gone forever. Aaron Hernandez. Can't be purchased. Can't be anything. So make sure you sign up dollarwise Apple. All right, let's jump into these finances, shall we? Freedom Card. What's going on?

[B]

Ah, the Freedom Card. That is the card that I would use for all my daily expenses.

[A]

Wood?

[B]

Yes, wood.

[A]

I. You didn't just purchase $2,437.62 on it, did I?

[B]

Oh, well, yeah. I went Christmas shopping for my family.

[A]

Why is that more important than your entire future and the goals you're trying to do for yourself? You don't have children, so you don't have to take care of them. You don't have to give them a Christmas. What the are you buying for? Not required. Not in any way whatsoever. What are you doing? What Christmas are you buying for? Who are you buying for? You.

[B]

I bought for my mom, my dad, brother, my sister in law.

[A]

That's all stupid. That's all stupid. They don't matter. Nisa. Allah may be a gift.

[B]

Don't be disrespectful now.

[A]

Being disrespectful? Absolutely. I don't care. You. Who are you? I'll be disrespectful. You know what your savings account at a traditional bank is doing for you? Absolutely nothing. It's basically a storage unit with worse rent. That is why I partner with Chime, who is offering up to a 350 bonus. Right now their high yield savings account earns up to 3.5 APY, which is over eight times the national average. Let me make this real $10,000 in your old regular savings account. Maybe just bucks in interest a year. With Chime, you're looking at around $350. That is a weekend trip or like six tanks of gas. And there's no monthly fees, no minimum balance fees. And you can access your money whenever. Which is great because I'm using mine to build an emergency fund and I'd rather not have to solve a riddle to touch it. It just takes a few minutes to sign up. And with automatic savings tools like roundups and direct deposit splits, it's like a set it and forget it money move. Oh, and Chime lets you get your paycheck up to two days early. So your bank's dragging its feet. But Chime has already moved on. But the best part right now you can get up to $350 with a new Chime account. When you sign [e-mail] Caleb the New Year is right around the corner. So get it done before then. You can scan the QR code on screen or go to the link below or chime.com caleb let's get to the show. Wanna know a dirty little secret? And no, I'm not starting an Only you're not broke because you suck with money. You just can't see where it's going. If your bank account is empty at the end of every month month, that is not bad luck. That is bad tracking. And it's exactly why I use dollar wise. It shows you exactly where your money's going every single month. Spending subscriptions and savings all in one simple dashboard. Everything you need and nothing you don't. And when you download Dollar Wise today, you'll get to try it for free. Plus three months for just 9.99 so you can finally take control and see what your money's been doing behind your back. Click below to get started. Started my show. Okay and I'm being disrespectful. The fact is you do not need to buy your mother and father and cousin and sister and all these dumbass mother gifts.

[B]

I know I don't need to.

[A]

Why'd you do it?

[B]

Because I wanted to.

[A]

So that's more important?

[B]

It felt more important.

[A]

Felt more important. Well if it is, then it's more important and the conversation is done. And that's fine. Listen, I will ask any I know the holiday. It happens every year. It's not a surprise that pops up.

[B]

It's not something that happens every single month.

[A]

But something happens every single month. And the fact is the credit you with where you are in your debt with the month before this, with the month now. Your debt's staying about the same. There's always a replacement. Next month will be a vacation. Like. Like that's what's always going to happen. Christmas is not a surprise. This isn't something that oh, it's Christmas. Like you intentionally did this and it happens every year. It's going to happen all the years for the next couple decades that you stay alive because you're fat and no longer than that. It will always be there.

[B]

I don't think it will always be there.

[A]

Christmas will not always be there.

[B]

It's cuz I don't do Christmas.

[A]

What? Come on.

[B]

I don't do Christmas like everybody, okay? I don't buy gifts once a year. I buy gifts every two years and this was the year of gifts.

[A]

What are you even talking about? That is a you thing. You do not have to be a complete moron.

[B]

I know it's a me thing. I never said it wasn't.

[A]

But you don't have to.

[B]

I know I don't have to.

[A]

Then why excuse that?

[B]

Because that's what I want to do for the people that I love.

[A]

Them.

[B]

No, they. They care for me and they help me.

[A]

So yeah, you can help them in so many different ways. And what do you. You can give. Oh my gosh. Listen, you can do thoughtful things that don't require thousands of dollars spent. They get you away from your goal when you're barely even able to cover your own mortgage. And your deb getting worse and worse and worse and worse.

[B]

And sometimes you should have done.

[A]

How much did you spend on Christmas? You.

[B]

Probably those thousand something Christmas? Yeah.

[A]

No, but, but no, no. On this card alone you spend $2,437.62.

[B]

Yeah, there's other charges on there then other than Christmas gifts.

[A]

If you only make your minimum payments.

[B]

And you which I don't.

[A]

And you do not purchase, which you're incapable of. How long would this take to pay off this card?

[B]

If I just do the minimum payment.

[A]

And no purchasing of which you're incapable of. $110.

[B]

110.

[A]

Doesn't matter that you put a little more towards it. You put 400 cuz you spent 2,500. So shut the up. If you only make your minimum and you do not purchase of which again you are incapable of, what then? And how long would it take to pay off?

[B]

Well, I don't know. What's 110 divided by 4,000? Because that's how long it would take me to pay it off.

[A]

How long do you think?

[B]

I'm not doing math in my head, girl.

[A]

My goodness. I'm just trying to see your assessment of your financial situation. I don't know, maybe of where your brain's at.

[B]

Maybe a year.

[A]

Okay. It takes 14 years. The rest of your lifespan.

[B]

How would it take 14 years? I don't ever pay minimum payments, so that's.

[A]

That doesn't matter when you purchase. Literally. What was it Five times what you put towards it. You purchased five times what you put towards. I don't care if you put more than your minimum payment. If you put five times what you paid towards, it doesn't matter.

[B]

I don't always put that much. It just happened to be that much because of Christmas.

[A]

Goodness. You said you only spent a thousand on Christmas. So? So then you would have spent an extra,437 outside of Christmas anyway when you only put 458 towards it. So shut up. You still. Three times. No, no, no, no, no, NO. Yeah, yeah, three times what you put towards it on bullshit. That was outside of Christmas, so. What are you talking about?

[B]

It wasn't bullshit. It was things that I needed.

[A]

Your balance is over the credit limit. You. Huh? Is it that important?

[B]

It was to me.

[A]

That is because we've already established you are a broken individual who needs to seek mental health care immediately. It's all bullshit. It's literal. All bullshit. You. You are. You are insane. Tik Tock shop. Which casket? What are we doing? What are we doing?

[B]

Google Micro.

[A]

Shut the up. What is Microfun?

[B]

It's a game doing. It's called Gossip Harbor. It's a little game on my phone. You just make.

[A]

What do you do?

[B]

You just make what they ask of like the cus. There's like people. They ask of things. You have to make them and create things to unlock things.

[A]

You pay for this?

[B]

I paid as a distraction.

[A]

What were you distracting yourself from?

[B]

My grandfather passed away.

[A]

Well, that is sad.

[B]

So I use the game as a mental block.

[A]

Normally I can only not have a therapist. Do you not have friends? Do you not have a support system? Because you need more healthy coping mechanisms than destroying your entire life because something truly sad happened.

[B]

I do have a therapist.

[A]

Okay, then what the are you doing? Because destroying your entire life? Because something, again, I will say is very sad and I'm sorry that happened. But you do not destroy your life because of it. Because then you have double bad.

[B]

It was.

[A]

It makes it extra hard.

[B]

It was definitely a difficult moment for me and I fell into the. Just wanting to block out my brain. So that's what happened. Because normally when I play the game, I am.

[A]

What's that?

[B]

What is what I'm saying?

[A]

Shia Exeris Hel SIA Halixir IRS S I A H E L I X.

[B]

I R S Ah, it's body oils. Anointing. Body oils for what? Witchcraft.

[A]

Are you actually all into that?

[B]

Yes, I am a witch.

[A]

It's not just for fun.

[B]

No, it runs in my family.

[A]

What?

[B]

Yes, it runs in my family. I have ants that, you know, do cleansings and see dead people.

[A]

And they see dead people.

[B]

Yeah. We lived in a haunted house. My mom saw them. My brothers played with them. I carry ghosts with me. Yeah, I'm very into this. This is. Yeah, it's in my blood. It runs in my family.

[A]

Bro, I'm gonna have to level with you. This don't look right.

[B]

I'm gonna let you process that.

[A]

Okay. And peacock.

[B]

I canceled my peacocks.

[A]

You better have, because it's pointless. It's stupid. Uber Eats. More TikTok Shop. Uber Eats. Micro Fun again. There's the mobile app game. TikTok shop. Micro fun. Disney plus microfun. TikTok shop. TikTok Shop. TikTok Shop. TikTok Shop.

[B]

TikTok Shop Was Christmas shopping.

[A]

I don't around with our witchcraft stuff. That shit scares me. Why?

[B]

It's not scary.

[A]

Oh. Cause you could do something bad to me.

[B]

Why would I do something bad to you? That's not.

[A]

I hope you don't.

[B]

That's not. There's different ways of practicing.

[A]

Oh, yeah. Jack and crack. Witch week. Let's do this.

[B]

Okay. There's people that do that, and they want to work with that. That's their deal. They want to do that. I don't touch that stuff. I work in light. I work in light.

[A]

Do something bad to Brandon.

[B]

No, I don't do that stuff.

[A]

No, do something bad to him. He's nasty.

[B]

Whatever you put out to the universe comes back to you, even if you assist with it. So I don't touch that kind of stuff. I only do wood. Helping, protecting and cleansing. That's all I deal with.

[A]

Four more TikTok shops. Microfun again. Spotify. Microphone, Microphone. Microphone, microphone. Uber eats. Uber Eats. $94.95 there. Michael F. Take that shot. Stop. Penalty fee this year so far. And hundreds in interest. Hundreds in interest.

[B]

Yeah. That's my bad card.

[A]

It's your bad card. Why? Why would you even allow there to be a bad card? Okay. Use the FIZ card. Debit card. That builds credit. A lot of people out there use it who are not credit card people. Helps benefit their credit because you care about your credit. I would just do that instead of this closest. You can't have access to it. You're broken. I mean, you already have a good career. I'll get you a course. Career certification. As well as an extra tool. A lot of people out there use it as well. But you already have a good Career. There is the sales one in there. Could help you turn it around because you're starting to fail. Instead of 27.49 interest rate. Listen, $964 on Tik Tok shop is actually insane. What the is wrong with you? Pull up your TikTok shop.

[B]

It was Christmas.

[A]

Pull up your tick tock shop.

[B]

It was Christmas.

[A]

Shop now. Christmas. You're a witness witch?

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

And do they celebrate Christ?

[B]

Does my family? We don't. Yeah. What are you talking about?

[A]

I think witchcraft is very against the Bible.

[B]

No, it's in the Bible.

[A]

Is the bible in favor or anti witchcraft?

[B]

No, the Bible is witchcraft.

[A]

What?

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

You shall not permit a sorcerer to live. Exodus 22:18. Let no one be found among you who practices divination or sorcery. Anyone who does these things is destable to the Lord. Deuteronomy 18:something. I will be swift to testify against sorcerers. There's actually quite a lot.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

The acts of the flesh are obvious. Adultery and witchcraft. The cowardly and unbelieving. Those who practice magic arts will be co assigned to the lake of fire. That doesn't sound very good. I don't like the lake of Fire. Wherever that is not a place I want to visit.

[B]

That's not my fault. They wrote their book against the things that they do. Well, I'm just saying they do rituals. They do blood rituals of humans. No, the drinking the body and the blood of Christ is a blood ritual.

[A]

Oh, like it is. I don't know if they qualify that as that.

[B]

But the witchcraft goes against their little book.

[A]

I just thought you said you were in that. If you're not, it's okay. I don't care.

[B]

The Bible is different. Different from Christ. I believe religion and God are two separate things.

[A]

Oh, listen, I mean, I don't care what you believe either way. I was the. The hilarious confliction of witchcraft. And that is very interesting. Okay, I don't even know what the this is. Okay, you got like a cord cover. Very important.

[B]

Oh, that was for the oven.

[A]

These little soft fluffy things. Oh. Start screen recording, please. Oh, well, chat can know what the you're purchasing.

[B]

You want just the meteor or the mic?

[A]

Oh, just media, I guess. Almost a thousand dollars. It's crazy. It's crazy. It's crazy. 8% of the cost. 8% of the cost for what you just did here. You could have signed up for our master your money program with all of our classes. Premium version of the budget nap. And you could have actually changed your life. Like literally tens of thousands of people. But yet you just do. Tick tock shop. This is crazy.

[B]

It was crazy.

[A]

The value of things out there that can actually benefit you versus just around. Okay, in some Eminem jewelry. Gingerbread on a plate. Jewelry. Stupid. Some cloths chick quality boost. Hair. Nasty ass shit. More hair Shit. Some towels. A fake rose. Another cord hider. A drinky sippy cup that is glass and is a teddy bear. A jewelry holder. I think maybe a bag. Another bag. A fan. Electric handheld fan. Foot cream. I don't even know what this is. You're just getting the most random that I've just. You need to live a simple life. Dude. This is so overcomplicating. Everything. Pens. Okay, that's not the end of the world. But you go crazy. What? Like what even are these?

[B]

I don't know what you're looking at.

[A]

Vac bird. What are they? Oh, let's travel. Vacuum bag set.

[B]

Okay, Yeah, I needed that for my trip.

[A]

No you don't. Shut the fuck up. Another bag of some kind. Some chips, I think a Nirvana shirt. A sweatshirt, A book. Oh my gosh. An app. A your sister shirt. What the fuck are we doing?

[B]

Christmas shopping?

[A]

Cleaning planner. Because everyone has ADHD. TikTok. TikTok brain.

[B]

Oh, I don't have ADHD.

[A]

Gloves, Grace. Great. Another little book thing. Some shoes, a cleaning. Some sunglasses. Oh my gosh. This is all. What is that? Is that a belly button piercing?

[B]

I don't know, girl.

[A]

What is it? Just lose weight. We don't need to focus on that. No one should be seeing that anyway. Unless you lose weight. Okay, that's a mess. I barely even went through your tik tok shop and that was a mess. The balance on this is horrendous. Sapphire prefer. What the are you doing?

[B]

So the sapphire has my Europe trip on it.

[A]

Oh my goodness. When, When, When?

[B]

When do I go to Europe?

[A]

You haven't yet.

[B]

No, I go in April.

[A]

What did this cost? You animal. You beast of a creature. You can't even pay your mortgage.

[B]

It paid 9,000.

[A]

9,000? For what?

[B]

For 35 days around Europe.

[A]

Where are you going?

[B]

Barcelona, Amsterdam, London, Germany, Rome, Athens.

[A]

How can you even take that much time off of work?

[B]

Because I can.

[A]

Should you? It's all commission based.

[B]

I did hourly too.

[A]

Yeah, but you know, that's tiny.

[B]

I mean, yeah, but I'll still have it.

[A]

Yeah, but you don't. You already can't pay your mortgage and then you're spending 8,000 hours on an interesting car card to Europe. Which means, by the way, you already had an extra 6,000 on here. 7,000 on here. That's crazy. And then you're gonna throw away your income for a whole month in a week. Why?

[B]

It's my 30th birthday.

[A]

Get to my 30th birthday. I already turned 30. No one gives a. No one cares. No one cares. The only people that care about birthdays are in your community. The quinceanera. What is that? No one gives a. About 30. Nothing happens. You don't need to blow $8,000 that you definitely cannot afford. And also take away from your income that you cannot afford. No one gives a.

[B]

To be fair, I paid for Europe. Well, I purchased the trip two years ago. I booked my trips two years in advance.

[A]

So pause you number two. You've had this balance on here for two years?

[B]

No.

[A]

So what the are you talking about? Shut the up.

[B]

I just didn't have to charge it until.

[A]

So it's not purchasing it. You.

[B]

It is purchased. Everything is set to go. The only thing is you just have to make the initial payment and then after you just have to pay.

[A]

What was the initial payment?

[B]

700 bucks.

[A]

No, you put a down payment down. You're a little 24 years. This is. That's. That's like a third of a life.

[B]

I don't ever about a half a.

[A]

Life for the lifestyle you live.

[B]

Yeah, well, I don't ever pay the. Just the minimum balance. So I've never actually had debt that.

[A]

Long up with that. And also yes, you only pay the minimum balance.

[B]

Oh, on that one. Yeah.

[A]

What are we doing? Shut the up.

[B]

It's because I'm doing the snowball right now. So that one only gets snowball.

[A]

Yeah. Snowball. Yeah, you snowball. What snowball are you snowballing? You look like a brown snowball. Snowball rolling down a hill.

[B]

Literally are dressed like a snowball.

[A]

Talking about snowball. No snowball method in any world whatsoever has you spent $2,500 just because. Oh, Christmas and TikTok shop. Happen. Happen. Snowball. Your snowball. You've never heard of snowball. You don't know what a snowball is. So you've never seen a snowball. You. You live in the desert. Shut the up. Snowball.

[B]

I've done it twice.

[A]

Snowball method. You obviously ineffectively because you're here today. None of it matters if where you are today is K. Okay, K. I don't give a. Huh? Piece of. What are you talking about? Snowball. No snowball method. Which. There's only one snowball method. It's called the snowball method method suggests spending $2,500 on an interest recurring credit card when you only put $400 towards it. Snowball. What are you talking about? You. What? You're not snowballing. Never say that again in your life.

[B]

That is what I'm doing.

[A]

No. Objectively. No. That is not the snowball method. You.

[B]

Look, just because I spent money on Christmas doesn't mean that's not what I was doing prior to that. All right? Just because I spent that much for Christmas doesn't mean that's what I was doing prior to that.

[A]

Doesn't matter. That's not the snowball method. Method.

[B]

But that is what I'm doing.

[A]

So if you cancel your trip, will it.

[B]

I'm not canceling my trip.

[A]

If you cancel your trip, would it. Would you get your money back? How would it work?

[B]

I don't know. Because I'm not doing it.

[A]

Why?

[B]

So I never looked into it.

[A]

Who cares? Do it when you can afford it. No, I'm single forever anyway, so it doesn't matter.

[B]

I want to.

[A]

You can do it whenever you want to do it. I don't give a about what you want. There's needs. You can barely take care of your needs. You need an income.

[B]

My needs are met.

[A]

Your needs are barely not met. The one person leaves in the traveling nursing brigade and you're not really.

[B]

Yeah, it's happened already. So you got.

[A]

You went and did 10. What are you talking about? Shut the up. Snowball.

[B]

Yeah. I'm not canceling Europe. I'm going to Europe. It's my 30th birthday. It's my birthday.

[A]

Why are you here if you're not willing to make any sacrifices whatsoever? Why am I wasting my time with you?

[B]

I am willing to make sacrifices. I'm just not canceling.

[A]

That seems like the pretty basic sacrifice.

[B]

No, I mean like, yeah, no. Like, I'm not gonna do any more traveling after for a while.

[A]

Says every person that's addicted to endlessly doing the thing that they do four times a year. Shut the up. Not traveling. Snowballing. Shut up. People can't live debt free. Shut up. Not fat. Shut up. You don't know what you're talking about. You don't live in reality. Shut up.

[B]

I don't live in your reality.

[A]

What? I'm just in reality. What am I saying? That is not real.

[B]

All of it. So.

[A]

Good one. Got me.

[B]

I mean, I am doing the snowballing. I am going to stop traveling. I don't consider myself that. So. I mean, all of it. Like, what did you.

[A]

The entire medical community considers you overweight, almost obese, soon to be. And that's if you even told me you're correct. Weight which women.

[B]

Oh, okay.

[A]

So. So how can we just say that that is not the case? Again, medical definition, our BMI is perfect. No, but you. Come on, it's not like you got muscle. Okay, okay.

[B]

But, yeah, I'm not canceling that trip.

[A]

Well, I'm being told you need an additional 2, 500 hours in spending money to go across.

[B]

That is the goal, yes.

[A]

And how are you doing that?

[B]

My dad's giving me 500 for now. Yeah, I am spoiled. I'm aware of it.

[A]

Enabled. Disgusting.

[B]

Very much so.

[A]

You'll never get anywhere in life being blessed. No, it's called getting enabled.

[B]

It's called being blessed.

[A]

Nope. So keep going. Where's the other coming from again? Can't pay your bills.

[B]

Waiting for my travel bonus. Seeing what that is.

[A]

Travel bonus? What travel bonus?

[B]

The bonus that I get that helps pay for my travels.

[A]

What, they're giving you a bonus for your vacation or. What travels are you talking about?

[B]

So I get paid based on the sales for the year. I get a paid a travel bonus.

[A]

Do you travel for your job?

[B]

No, it's just like, what? It's what my boss gives us.

[A]

This is the annual bonus?

[B]

No.

[A]

Know.

[B]

What happened?

[A]

Well, my first attempt at building a budgeting app, it. It didn't go over very well. So I'll rewind. After hundreds of financial auto guests, one pattern stood out. People weren't failing because they try. They were being handed crappy tools that weren't built for real life. So I tried to see if I could fix it. In January last year, 2025, I launched an app driven by the belief that budgeting shouldn't feel complicated or intimidating. I had good intentions, but the first app was a complete dumpster fire. I was trusting the wrong developer. And that partner cost us thousands. And left my customers with the buggy app that only kind of worked. And that failure forced me to ask a question that I couldn't avoid. Do I walk away or do I try again? Ultimately, I chose to double down and commit to building a new app the right way. Myself and an incredible team. Every dollar that I made from YouTube went straight back into the product. No investors, no shortcuts. Just the belief that I could change lives with a better approach. So we rebuilt the app again and again. 38 different versions in total. I obsessed over everything. Single detail that most people wouldn't ever notice. And that's because if this app was going to go live, it had to work for real people with real lives. So everyone who stuck with me and my team shared their feedback and believed in what we're doing. Thank you. You helped shape what this has become. This is my vision for the future of budgeting. And I'm just getting started. $6.0 is finally launching on 4 February 17th. Rewrite your money story. Learn [e-mail] we're so back. It's a win win. You get money and I get money. These are called affiliates and you get that sweet, sweet cash for signing up for some amazing products. The first one is Chime. This is a checking account that I personally use and you get up to a 350 bonus with a new Chime checking account and earn up to 3.5% APY on your savings savings. And second, my investing app of choice these days is Webull and get a 2% match on all of your money that you transfer over. And finally sign up for automated investing with acorns. Typically the sign up bonus is only five bucks. Both my link, you get $20, ladies and gents. You get money, I get money. Enjoy. Links are in the description below. What are you talking about, dude? How much was it last year? Your travel bonus?

[B]

Last year's. We did. We did 3,500. I. Yeah, I was trying to think of what level we hit. So it's 3500.

[A]

Okay. It sounds like it's just an extra bonus for hitting some kind of company goals. Dude, literally all they hit your account last month was 2,646. What the.

[B]

What is that the freedom one or which are you looking at?

[A]

No, that was all that hit your checking accounts. That was your entire income source.

[B]

Oh, it doesn't have the other check. That's why.

[A]

Why would it not have the other check? That's why.

[B]

Why? Because it doesn't show up on that statement. Because of when I get paid.

[A]

Why? That's an entire month worth. You should have it within there even previous.

[B]

No, because when I sent in the documents, I got paid the next day.

[A]

Did I? Why would it not have the previous month's pay then?

[B]

I don't know. That's the statement.

[A]

Okay, what hit the next day?

[B]

The next day was 2,350.

[A]

So you made a total of 5,000?

[B]

Yes.

[A]

How much did you spend within that same period? What was the outflow?

[B]

I don't know, honestly.

[A]

Okay, how about you guess just based on the lifestyle that you lived? Do you not Know how this works. I know you've seen the show. Oh, my goodness. I know I'm being cranky, but she's seen the show.

[B]

Isn't 2, 40, 16 too much weed? Too much weed. Like 600?

[A]

Okay. Huh?

[B]

Maybe like 600.

[A]

Lindsay, I think. I think you have found Financial Audit.

[B]

This episode is brought to you by indeed.

[A]

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[B]

Instead, you use Indeed sponsored Jobs to find the right people with the right skills fast. It's a simple way to make sure your listing is the first candidate. C. According to Indeed data, Sponsored Jobs have four times more applicants than non sponsored jobs. So go build your dream team today with Indeed. Get a $75 sponsored job credit@ Indeed.com podcast. Terms and conditions apply.

[A]

It's the most guess. Can that be the title? Yeah, financial audit's most guess. We might get canceled for it, but I think that is the actual title. Put it in the notes. That is the title. It's official Financial audits. Most guess. I mean, it's just like you're broken. Like it was $8,000.

[B]

Oh, no, it wasn't, was it really?

[A]

Just stay in Europe. You belong with them. Interest accruing like crazy. Plan fee for a ticket at world thing you did. Oh, my goodness. 574 of fees this year. I don't know if they're purchase fees, late fees, whatever, but it's insane with almost a thousand an entry interest. What the are we doing? You've had fees up the dick. Why are you missing payments? Most likely. What are you doing?

[B]

Not missing payments.

[A]

You probably are.

[B]

No, I'm not. I'm missed.

[A]

Not one. That's way too much. That is not just the annual fee.

[B]

It's the annual fee plus the fees for the payment.

[A]

Two bucks a month. How many payment plans have you had?

[B]

I think on that card, there was a total of six.

[A]

Oh, my goodness. Why? Why do you want to live that life where you just lose money?

[B]

Money.

[A]

You make money. You could purchase things and just debit instead of paying. Why pay an extra 30 on everything? I just don't understand.

[B]

It was the cheaper option instead of.

[A]

Letting that it's 30 extra, but it.

[B]

Was cheaper when the payment plan because the interest was less fees.

[A]

Okay, why pay an extra 15 on something you're buying? Why go to McDonald's if they're like, buy something and choose an option where it costs 15 more? Because that's what you are doing when you.

[B]

I get points back.

[A]

Oh, my goodness. Okay, great. It's 13 more then. Why still do that? What's your logic? Yeah, okay, the two points are like 2 to 4%, but you're still losing 15.

[B]

But I've used the points multiple times. So pay off the credit cards.

[A]

Okay, I'm about to give up. Let's keep going because I'm gonna. Oh. Oh, the balance is so big. Bank of America. What is going on? Ladies, lady, tell me.

[B]

Bank of America is a water filtration system and some homeownership.

[A]

Every single person that gets on the show that can't afford a home immediately gets water filtration. 27 years to pay this off. By the way, with 109amonth, you're ruined. Good luck. Water filtration. What's wrong with your desert water?

[B]

A lot is wrong with the desert.

[A]

Water by the house, then. Couldn't afford it. Stupid.

[B]

I can afford it.

[A]

Yeah, sure. Incredible argument. With fees of $438 is a year so far. Promotional APR, it's going to be 25.74%, but that ends in August. Wow. You actually know something. That's kind of crazy. Why'd you know that?

[B]

Because I know when the zero interest runs out on all my cards.

[A]

Well, it's the one thing you track. No, that's horrible. But I'm glad you at least track that. But. Oh, you got solar pan panels, too. Why. Why are you doing all the.

[B]

I have to have. No, I have to have solar panels there.

[A]

It's.

[B]

It's 100 electrical community.

[A]

What? Yeah, every community is an electrical community.

[B]

We don't have any gas lines. It's 100 electrical.

[A]

Great. Pay for electricity, dumbass.

[B]

No, the contract requires you to get the solar panels.

[A]

Why would you purchase that then? That is a horrendous contract.

[B]

It was my house. That was my house.

[A]

That's stupid. There is, by the way, like, there's like five different.

[B]

I don't have an electricity bill. And the electric. When I did have an electricity bill.

[A]

Because you have a solar bill.

[B]

Yeah. Which is cheaper than what the electricity bill was.

[A]

Yeah, but this is a debt. You don't have a debt on your electricity.

[B]

It's the same thing.

[A]

No, it is not. Yes, because you can move. You can do all this stuff and cancel your energy plan and move into an apartment or whatever it might be. Who knows? But you. I can cancel it as well.

[B]

It's illegal.

[A]

You lease your solar. Yeah. Lease brings you out through an end of your term. Usually. You can't just cancel it in the middle of it.

[B]

No, I mean, but if I.

[A]

Well, there you go. You're not leasing your electricity. You're locked into a contract. Solar is not necessarily always bad. But all I'm saying is you signed up for a mortgage that is 70% of your income, immediately got a water filtration system on a card that you cannot pay off that is about to start accruing a ton of interest in just a few months and immediately got solar in a leased program. What are you talking about? You immediately made all the choices that cost more money.

[B]

The solars came with the house. I had to get up with the house. It was a part of the contract for the house. There was no out of it. There was no getting out of. Was either lease or buy the them. So at least them.

[A]

No. The other option is don't buy a house like this. That was my house financial on its most guest. It's my girl. There's literally like 15 different variations in houses across this entire country. You would find another one just like it somewhere else. Yes you would. I don't want to hear it. As someone who's very much into real estate, okay, let's be honest. Find a hundred different variations.

[B]

Okay. Yes.

[A]

Across this entire country that is 10.

[B]

Minutes away from my work.

[A]

Maybe potentially. You bought a KB home. Yes. Yes.

[B]

10 minutes away from my house. No.

[A]

Oh, shut the up. Best buy. What you do. What you buy for your little house. You special little house girl.

[B]

Washer, dryer, refrigerator.

[A]

Yeah, you did. Oh. The pre built the designer KB house didn't even come with any utilities.

[B]

You could have paid for them but they were more expensive and I don't want to include them.

[A]

This is stupid. You could not afford this to save your life. You financed everything. Probably financed your 2.5% down. Down.

[B]

No.

[A]

Oh, thank you. Ow. $920 on the 17 years to pay off with the $30 minimum monthly payment. Let's see when this is zero percent interest. You've got a late fee this year. Yes.

[B]

No, I don't.

[A]

Yes. Yes. Literally yes.

[B]

No.

[A]

Yes. Literally yes. I.

[B]

That's impossible.

[A]

Nope. It literally happened. That's. That's.

[B]

Where does it say that that right there.

[A]

That's how much a late fee costs.

[B]

No, it's not a late fee. It can't be late.

[A]

Fey got it. Okay. Well done. That means I guess you didn't get it cuz you believe hard enough.

[B]

No, cuz I pay that card twice a month.

[A]

Yeah, but you missed it once. Maybe you didn't have maybe when you pick put pushed pay you didn't have enough money in your checking account. And it bounced. There's lots of ways for it to be late. But you've had a late fee. And now I don't believe you on the previous card when you said you've never had a late fee fee. Cuz anytime any guest in the history of the show says they've never had a late fee, they always have a late fee.

[B]

I've never had a go.

[A]

I don't want to hear it. Just close your mouth. Something every human has probably said to you in your entire life. Okay, why do I have your state farm life insurance policy? Please pay this 385amonth?

[B]

Yeah, that's the monthly.

[A]

Who's getting your life insurance? You have no one.

[B]

My niece.

[A]

Why?

[B]

Because I love her.

[A]

Why not just invest and make more money and have that go to her?

[B]

I mean I plan on doing that as well, but that was just do that instead.

[A]

Make more.

[B]

I mean the policy that's going to be paid off in five years. So.

[A]

Paid off. What? Oh, it's a loan.

[B]

No, it's a 10 year.

[A]

No, I have a loan.

[B]

I mean there's a loan on it. But your policy, it's a 15 pay life insurance. So it you pay it off in 15.

[A]

Yeah, it has to be whole life.

[B]

It is whole life.

[A]

Whole life is so stupid for someone in your income situation because it is not going to make that as the.

[B]

The actual difference pay whole life. You pay it off in 15 years, you don't have to make any payments towards it. I just don't understand how much more.

[A]

Money with outside of it though. Usually the only there's like 1% of the population that can actually make more money off of a whole life policy. And it is those who are beyond wealthy because it makes more sense to borrow against your whole life policy than pay your taxes by exiting equity positions. In no way. If you were just investing in the s and P500, I guarantee you would have done better.

[B]

Yeah, but I mean it was something that I got sold on. It was something 16.

[A]

They sold you a life insurance policy at 16?

[B]

My mom opened it for me.

[A]

Oh, your mom's a piece of.

[B]

Why it's the best time to get life insurance policy when you're younger life. You It's a 15 pay. It's not a whole life. It's a 15 pay.

[A]

You told me it was.

[B]

It's a 15 pay whole life. You only pay it for 15 years. You don't pay it whole life like a normal whole life policy.

[A]

Okay, let me read this. And what would she get if you.

[B]

Died, 100,000 plus the accrued cash value.

[A]

But you took a loan out against it.

[B]

Yeah, I don't have to pay back. So I took out some cash value that was in there.

[A]

Well hold on, hold on because I don't even trust how you're talking about things cuz I just can't take your word on it. And I don't obviously have the full contract in front of me. So like what the am I to do with this?

[B]

Would you like for me to explain to you the way insurance.

[A]

No, because hearing you, you don't think you're fat. I don't trust you in anything. You're literally, you know nothing about anything. So shut the up. I don't want to hear anything from you. I mean you might explain it for her what you think happens.

[B]

No, I can explain to her.

[A]

Shut the up. No, well, yeah, okay, so after you pay a total of $462,703 towards the that she gets 100,000. Is this minimum payment that this is. It's been 385amonth. Forever. Is that after you took out your loan?

[B]

No, forever girl.

[A]

385 12. Sorry. 46,200. There's something. There's something. What am I not getting here? Okay, okay, let me get this. Cash value is only 10,400 in there.

[B]

Right now because I took out.

[A]

You still get 9,000 in interest of 5.8%.

[B]

But I don't have to pay it back so.

[A]

Well, yeah, you're not going to get access to it. Your annualized premium is $1,332. And this was a loan for your down payment of your house. So you did borrow for the down payment of your house.

[B]

I don't have to pay back? No, I took out from my cash value. Not really alone. I took out from my cash value.

[A]

Any loan interest not paid within 35 days of the due date will be applied to the loan balance. Loan payments received during this time will be applied to the loan interest first. Yeah, you're just borrowing from yourself at a higher interest though.

[B]

But I also don't pay that. It gets accrued to the load loan. So if something was to happen up.

[A]

I don't want to hear it. I don't trust you for anything.

[B]

I mean, look, if something happens to me, then what will happen is they will take out of the cash value first to cover whatever loan balance I have and then from there I don't.

[A]

Trust you for anything.

[B]

But I know that policy back to back.

[A]

No I don't trust you for a single dick of information in this entire world. World. I will never. 15 year. I haven't around with 15 years, so I'm learning a little bit, but. Okay, okay. And listen, going into this 15 year thing, essentially it's just forcing you to pay it quicker again. Usually the benefit is allowing the money to grow a little tax free, but being able to borrow it from yourself when you're wealthy instead of having to sell equity positions for you. It is forced savings. It's working as a forced savings. However, however, even still, this money that you put towards it over 15 years would be worth maybe $250,000 if it was put in the market. Because you're essentially getting a low interest savings on this. It's just a bad investment. It's a bad savings vehicle. It's for savings, likely because you have absolutely no discipline whatsoever.

[B]

It is for savings.

[A]

Yeah, but it's shit savings because you would have more than double by the end of that 15 year term if you were just investing in the overall market.

[B]

Yeah, but at the time when I got that policy, it was 15 years ago ago or 10 years ago, sorry, when I got it.

[A]

Yeah, but I would just try to get out of it and just start building up market investment.

[B]

I do plan on doing that, but I'm not getting out of that.

[A]

Why?

[B]

Because it's almost done being paid off and it will continue to accrued. It will continue to accrue cash value. Yeah, yeah, but it will continue to accrue cash value.

[A]

Dividend is insanely low, it seems. I mean, your dividends have only gone. You're almost done, and it's only gone $1,133 of the $100,000. So you're getting a, like a 1%.

[B]

Because I took out. Because I took out the nine.

[A]

Okay, so over the last 12 years though, you got less than 1% a year.

[B]

I guess so, yeah.

[A]

That's horrendous.

[B]

It's just a savings and additional savings.

[A]

No, it's. You just gave them free money for them to go invest and make a lot of money while you got nothing is actually what just happened.

[B]

I mean, I do plan on investing. It's just not something I can do right now, so.

[A]

Well, because of this, because this is forcing you to 385amonth. So since 16, what are you, 29. Okay, so 13 years. So it's done and it's done in two years. This is what it could have been. Instead, by the way, the market's done. In much better than 12% over that time. But I'll just. Let's just do 12% to be conservative either way for the 12 years. No, it's been 13 years. And in addition of. Of 385.86amonth. Yeah. $150,000 instead of 100. You lost 50,000 hours doing this. Okay, okay, okay.

[B]

I mean, but there's accruing cash value on that policy always and forever. So I mean, maybe at some point it will be more than 150 if I don't touch the cash value again because that accrues cash value for life.

[A]

And it's kind of shitty because that entire time, like, yeah, it'll pay out. Even when you're 90. It'll like pay out, but it'll pay out at 100 plus the dividend, which is going to be almost nothing where instead that hundred thousand would have been growing in the market. This is a policy, dude. Again, you're not able to take advantage of the actual borrowing against yourself like most people do. And you borrowed against yourself. Defer your down payment. So again, you're never, you never actually put any cash on the table.

[B]

I did, but what was it? Only 7,000 because they used the initial 10. Because the 10 was a deposit to hold the lot that we were going to go towards my down and then I had to put an additional seven.

[A]

So you haven't paid anything towards the loan. Obviously interest will keep compounding on it, which means the death benefit is endlessly shrinking if you're really caring about the impact of your needs.

[B]

So there's three other life insurance policies.

[A]

Sure. But it's just endlessly compounding because you're never touching that loan. Which means whatever she might get is going to be absolutely practically nothing on this one.

[B]

Yeah, maybe on the other three she's.

[A]

So what's the point of you even having it then? You essentially threw 2, 350 away every single month for you to get 10,000. What the are we doing? It's just beyond stupid. It's horrible. Horrible. It's stupid. Oh my goodness. She has four life insurance policies I'm not even gonna look at. This is so stupid. Okay. Kia Finance. So you got a kia, huh? An 84 month term. You do everything wrong. Low savings, high payment plans for car. What's the Kia?

[B]

It's a forte year 2024.

[A]

Oh, you got it the same day as the house.

[B]

Yeah, girl.

[A]

Your. Your financial audits most. Yeah. Guess.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

The day that I got the audits most guest.

[B]

I Didn't have a car at the time.

[A]

So it's happened. Financial audit's most guest, ladies and gentlemen, this back it's 2026 and you are the definition. What's the interest rate again?

[B]

The car?

[A]

Yes. Oh, I don't know. You don't know the interest rate?

[B]

No, I don't remember the number. I remember what it was when I did it, but I don't remember what it is now.

[A]

I doubt it's a great interest rate. And it's going to be all the way through. 31. 20, 31. Which is crazy. Oh my gosh. We're getting the value of the car, but looking at your house, we already went over it. You have like a $50,000 equity position, which is about 8.5%. Okay. And the house itself, you owe $476,967.73 interest rate basically 7%. And it is $4,227 and 53 cents a month. That's insanity in crazy. Sandy, what is wrong with you? What is wrong with you? Dude, it's so crazy the way you live your life. And the moment you signed up that thing that is 70% of your income, you went and got a car payment. I don't even know what to do.

[B]

I needed a car.

[A]

Shut the up. Could have got a $10,000. I don't even want to hear it. Shut up. 200 in our checking account. Who would have thought? Starter Bros. Donut Star, Chick Fil A Tobacco, Veneers Distributors. Let me see them.

[B]

I don't have Veneers.

[A]

Vin Tenors Distributors.

[B]

I don't know.

[A]

It's marked as food. 17.24 savings went up from $32 to 62.

[B]

That's the account that I pay my mortgage payment on there.

[A]

Where's your retirement?

[B]

I don't have one.

[A]

Die. Well, thank goodness you have a life insurance policy that's doing absolutely dog nothing. I have four that are doing absolutely dog nothing. Knowing you.

[B]

The other ones are fine.

[A]

Doubt. What do you think your car is worth that you owe 21. 423 on?

[B]

I don't know. I'm probably 16.

[A]

Yes. I guess if you endlessly guess, you'll eventually get one right. You got that one right. Financial audits get most guests maybe no longer, but. Or that was just a rain man game you just pulled on me. All right, let's try to budget this thing. $6,200 a month. Month annual bonus. You just gotta flex that out on a monthly basis or just throw it towards that. Whatever you can do that. Minimum monthly payments outside of your mortgage 662.63 with your mortgage being $4,227.53. Water, gas, electric, utilities, all that combined.

[B]

How much water bill is $98, I guess. Yeah, yeah. Water's $98. Solar panels is 187. Internet, that's 45 bucks. Security system is 54.

[A]

Oh my goodness. You financed that? No, no.

[B]

It's just a monthly service.

[A]

You didn't finance your security system. How'd you pay for it?

[B]

I just paid for it.

[A]

How much? Thousands.

[B]

It was I think a total of 3,000.

[A]

You just paid four for it?

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Okay. $384. This is not, you know. What's your phone bill?

[B]

I don't have a phone bill.

[A]

Parents?

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Child do helium when you can. If t mobile is good in your area and it should be gas ver from Drive. Drive. How much a month?

[B]

100. Car insurance, 180.

[A]

Food? 300amonth. Use the budget plan in our budgeting, the meal plan in our budgeting class and the cookbook there TP fund anything else you need to survive. About a hundred bucks. Tampons, all that good stuff. Medical, healthcare. Okay, I'm putting in 300 bucks. 300 bucks, dude. You have any gym?

[B]

Yeah, but it's a yearly membership.

[A]

How much a year?

[B]

64 bucks.

[A]

Not bad. Okay, we'll put it at six bucks. You have any pets?

[B]

No.

[A]

Good. Subscriptions. I'll try 40. And then what do you get from your tenants?

[B]

Thousand seven hundred. Cool.

[A]

So we'll put your income at 7900 then. Anything else that needs to be in your budget that I have not put in.

[B]

You don't want to put weed in there.

[A]

I put health insurance, which is better. Whatever you want to put fund money towards, you can. But I don't think you have have fun money. Okay, so you need $6356 to survive on a monthly basis. So if you do not have their rent, you're done. The rent is the only reason you're able to survive right now. Low months like you just had, you're be. You're definitely underwater. But 1,000 here, I'll give you $94 for fun. $9,484. Okay. Yippee. So you get $1,500 left on a monthly basis. Okay.

[B]

Okay.

[A]

Obviously your mortgage are not like trying to freak out and pay off early by any means. 62,000 your debt sake. Outside of the house. Okay, 41 months. That's manageable. You're already where you are where you want to be in life in terms of house and car. So listen, three and a half years to pay off your debt ain't bad. And that's actual snowball. Smallest to large. There's no spending on any of them. Close your car cards. Yeah, three and that's not that bad. Call four and a half years to get into the full fun emergency fund as well. That's not that bad. Go through the master your money program. Use the dollar wise budgeting app. Use the cookbook. Use the meal plan. Use it all. Use our tools. Okay. Okay guys. The post show is about to be crazy. Apparently she's been funding a felon who just ghosted her and we're. Yeah, you're insane. Financial on its most guest. We're gonna go into the text messages is insane. It's absolutely insane. Join Hammer Leaf. The best membership and number one on YouTube for a reason. Three shows, premium shows, incredible shows. Posted every single day, six days a week including an extra 20 minutes of this episode. Financial auto posture. I'll see you guys there. Click that join button. Oh, and also Hammer Financial score. I'm back spending on a budget. Well, you overspent. 0 out of 10 debt. No collections. But definitely not great debt. Those are chunky numbers. Do a 2 out of 10 emergency fund. There was nothing below. It's below a thousand. Absolutely zero out of ten retirement. I mean that's horrendous. I'm gonna give you a 1 out of 10 for that real estate. At least you got that. You do have an equity position. Interest rate 7%. Not thrilling. Oh, position is only because it's gone up and you're forced to get a solar panel. It's just. It's not the best. I'll give it a five out of ten. Hammer financial score. Get yours at Caleb. Hammer.com rounded up to two out of ten. See you all in the post show.

[B]

He is in prison.

[A]

I told you. You look like someone who's taking it with felons and pushing out kids. That's what she looks like.

[B]

She was spending $2 dollars per month.

[A]

On phone calls with him. How are you funding a felon if you can't even pay your own bills? Hammer Elite is the best YouTube membership on the platform and I just upgraded it. New dedicated premium shows every single day, Monday through Friday. Join with the link in the pinned comment or description below. This is the best membership you'll ever join and that's a promise.