The Most Hated Woman In Financial Audit History

Summary

Podcast Summary: Financial Audit with Caleb Hammer

Episode: The Most Hated Woman In Financial Audit History
Date: August 4, 2025
Host: Caleb Hammer
Guest: Sandy, 40, Cocoa Beach, Florida

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Episode Overview

This episode features Sandy, a financially struggling single mother of three from Cocoa Beach, Florida. Billed as "the most hated woman in Financial Audit history," Sandy walks through her complex and often impulsive financial life, marked by significant inheritances, high spending, and ongoing conflict over child support with her ex-husband. Host Caleb Hammer pulls no punches as he analyzes her budget failures, challenges her justifications, and offers brutally honest advice. The conversation is candid, combative, and darkly funny—the rawest look yet at mismanaged privilege, divorce finances, and generational wealth.

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Key Discussion Points and Insights

1. Income and Household Background

• Sandy’s Career:
  • Ocular recovery technician, working per diem—makes ~$3,000/month net.
  • Also receives $2,150/month in child support (05:16, 24:22).
  • “So average PayCheck is like 1,500 every two weeks, net…” (01:38)
• Family:
  • Single mother to three children (one age 12, two age 10).
  • No other income source; ex-husband does not have shared custody.

2. Wealth, Inheritances, and Privilege

• Inheritance and Divorce Settlement:
  • Inherited a home from her parents (sold for $405k; initial purchase price $126k) (05:47).
  • Inherited additional brokerage/retirement accounts.
  • Received half of her ex-husband’s retirement plan in divorce (04:15).
  • Sandy insists her family was “very middle class,” which Caleb strongly disputes:
    • “You don't know what middle class is… Since the person who got inherited homes... What are you talking about middle class?” (05:30)

3. Financial Mismanagement and Poor Choices

• Habitual Overspending:
  • Routinely outspends her combined monthly net income; recent month: spent $10,000+ while bringing in $5,150 (20:05, 21:13).
  • Large, impulsive purchases:
    • $15,300 on an art restoration painting (25:30),
    • $6,000 on a facial peel (57:05, 57:43),
    • $4,000 on a vintage Rolex as “revenge” post-divorce (44:39).
• Credit Card Debt:
  • Significant balances:
    • Capital One: $17,936, with $341/month in interest (28:09, 28:54).
    • Amex: Routinely forgets payments, accrues fees and interest (50:40, 51:39).
    • Minimum payments already beyond what she can afford: “Your irresponsibilities leading these minimum payments. You can’t even come close to affording...” (52:41)
  • Justifies using credit cards for points and cash back rewards, yet forgets to pay off balances (29:00).
• Unbudgeted Living:
  • Over $1,000/month on dining out and DoorDash (09:01, 58:47).
  • Purchases random items on Amazon, aquarium hobby, DoorDash, “stuff I don’t even know what I spent on this month” (61:00+).
  • Refuses to track spending, frequently claims “I forgot” (51:00+).

4. Child Support Conflict and Gender Dynamics

• Child Support Modification Battle:
  • Sandy attempted to modify her child support agreement to adjust for inflation (03:03, 08:14).
  • “We negotiated that amount in 2020. Inflation is 10% over the past four years.” — Sandy (08:20)
  • Caleb’s diagnosis: “You negotiated this. This was you.” (11:28)
  • Caleb points out her extravagant spending would undermine her argument for greater support.
  • Drops the modification request because she doesn’t want her ex to see her finances:
    • “I’d rather go broke than have a man tell me how I spend my money.” (19:41)

5. Divorce, Co-Parenting, and the Messy Aftermath

• Relationship Dynamics:
  • Divorce initiated by Sandy following loss of her parents.
  • Ongoing sexual relationship with her ex even while fighting over money and custody:
    • “He still sleeps with me though.” — Sandy (45:06)
    • “Why are you doing it? Why are you not moving on? This is not healthy.” — Caleb (47:24)
• Emotional Rationales:
  • Sandy fixates on family history of early death, using it to defend “enjoying life now” through spending (07:02–07:39).
  • Expresses fear of “dying in Walmart,” i.e., working into old age due to draining retirement.

6. Retirement Accounts and Broader Net Worth

• Current Holdings:
  • Inherited/Divorce: Multiple IRA, Roth IRA, brokerage, and cash accounts totaling nearly $1 million, but balances are noticeably shrinking (82:06+).
  • “It’s gone in nine years at your current spending level.” — Caleb (37:14)
  • No real emergency fund (83:51).
• School Loan and New Debt:
  • Over $60,000 in new Sallie Mae debt to cover nursing school and supplement living expenses (74:01, 75:14).
  • Justifies borrowing for living so as not to “pull from retirement,” a math error corrected by Caleb (72:27).

7. Caleb’s Unfiltered Critique and Advice

• On Sandy’s Spending:
  • “Who the f*** are you to then come back? Well, look at these choices I made...” (14:46)
  • “You forget everything other than to go suck your ex’s dick three times a week. That’s the only thing you remember.” (51:07)
• On Her Parent’s Legacy:
  • “We’re throwing away everything. All the work our parents did…” (83:31)
• On Solutions:
  • “Pay off the high interest cards, cut them up. Strict budget. You can pull 40k/yr from your portfolio. That’s it.” (89:13)
  • Pushes her to confront budget reality, sell or refinance the house, cut lifestyle, and prioritize basic tracking/organization.
  • Emphasizes that her children’s future would benefit more from saved principal than flashy experiences and objects.

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Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• Inheritance & Privilege Reality Check
  • Caleb: “You don’t know what middle class is. You’ve never witnessed middle class.” (05:15)
• On Rationalizing Not Providing Finances for Child Support Adjustment
  • Sandy: “I’d rather go broke than have a man tell me how I spend my money.” (19:41)
• On Impulsive, Charitable Spending
  • Caleb: “Dude, you’re literally begging for charity, and you’re giving char[ity] for $15,300.” (25:44)
  • Sandy (defensive): “It wasn’t his child support. It was my money. My money went to a painting.” (26:45)
• On Fiscal Forgetfulness and Its Consequences
  • Caleb: “Lady. What the f*** is wrong with you? How do you not know? You swiped it.” (29:38)
  • Sandy: "I forgot. I forgot to pay the bill." (51:05)
• On Using Debt Instead of Savings
  • Caleb: “But that's literally incorrect. It's 13% interest. Your market's getting 10.” (72:27)
• On Relationship Dynamics
  • Sandy: “He still sleeps with me though.” (45:06)
  • Caleb: “Please, man, stop sleeping with this woman.” (52:06)

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Key Timestamps for Important Segments

• 06:00–09:00 — Discussion of inheritance, housing, and transition post-divorce
• 11:00–14:45 — Heated debate on child support, inflation, and renegotiation
• 20:00–30:00 — Deep dive into Sandy’s budget (or lack thereof), debt, and spending habits
• 25:30, 44:39, 57:05 — Iconic impulsive spending moments: painting, Rolex, face peel
• 37:10–38:12 — Retirement math and realization her nest egg will run out
• 50:40–52:00 — Recurring “I forgot” excuses, credit card payments chaos
• 62:00–65:00 — Amazon, aquarium, and hobby spending breakdown
• 72:27–75:41 — Student loan strategy debunked (“living off Sally Mae”)
• 83:31–84:25 — Caleb eviscerates her for squandering her parents' savings
• 86:53–88:06 — Realistic budget breakdown and what it would take for Sandy to break even financially

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Summary Table: Sandy’s Financial Snapshot

| Category | Detail/Amount | |---------------------------|------------------------------| | Take-home Income | $3,000/month (per diem job) | | Child Support | $2,150/month | | Recent Spending | $10,500/month | | Credit Card Debt | >$18,000 ($341/mo interest) | | Student Loan Debt | ~$64,000 (Sallie Mae, recent)| | Mortgage | $2,040.24/mo (house near beach, $415k home) | | Shortfall | $5,000+ monthly (net) | | Major Purchases | $15k art, $6k face peel, $4k Rolex | | Retirement Savings | Nearly $1 million (rapidly depleting) | | Emergency Fund | None (invested in stocks) |

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Tone and Takeaways

This episode is a no-holds-barred, sometimes excruciatingly honest look at self-inflicted financial wounds, privilege denial, and the struggle to break cycles of mismanagement. Caleb spares no feelings in his critique, and Sandy’s persistent justifications only fuel the host’s skepticism and frustration. Listeners are left with a clear (if ruthless) blueprint for what not to do: track your spending, don’t confuse luck or inheritance with middle-class status or accomplishment, and don’t let emotional justifications undermine financial reality.

For anyone facing hard post-divorce personal finance decisions—especially those wrestling with privilege, budgeting, and the realities of single parenthood—this episode is a must-listen.

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Hammer Financial Score (89:34):
3.5 out of 10 (0 for Emergency Fund, 10 for Retirement, 7 for Real Estate—no budget and egregious mismanagement nullify positive assets)

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Not sure if you’re a financial “Sandy”? Listen and learn, but maybe keep the credit cards locked up while you do.

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“I’m living off Sally Mae. Not living off May. That cut [off]. Sally ass whore.”
— Caleb Hammer (76:19)

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For more tough-love audits and financial education, visit CalebHammer.com or Dollarwise.com.

Transcript

[A]

To watch episodes of Financial Audit a week earlier. Check us out on YouTube.

[B]

Men are just like this.

[A]

Oh, shut the up.

[B]

I swear, but shut the up. I just filed for a child support modification.

[A]

Why? Because you're responsible with your own money. You.

[B]

He gets cost of living adjustments with his salaries.

[A]

That's his job.

[B]

So why don't I. I raise his.

[A]

Children and then you come a begging.

[B]

A begging. You are such a man.

[A]

Who brought it up, huh? Who brought up getting a divorce?

[B]

Me.

[A]

You negotiated that account?

[B]

Yes.

[A]

Oh. Hammer Elite is the best YouTube membership on the Plan platform, and I just upgraded it. Three exclusive dedicated shows every single day, Monday through Friday. And for this final week, I'm paying for you to sign up. Sign up for Hammer Elite in the description or pin comment below and submit proof of purchase@hammer elite.com after that, I'll send you a $10 digital gift card that can be spent basically anywhere and in most countries. This is the best membership you'll ever join. That's a promise.

[B]

This is Sandy. I'm 40 years old. I'm from Cocoa Beach, Florida, and this is Financial Audit.

[A]

Thanks for coming over from Florida. I appreciate it. What do you do there for a living?

[B]

So I am an ocular recovery tech.

[A]

Wow. I have no idea what the that is. Please, please, just. What do you make?

[B]

So what do I make? I am per diem. So I'm on call and I make money per case, depending on where I go.

[A]

So average case amount?

[B]

Average case amount is about 170, 50. It really varies. I can tell you.

[A]

What's your per case? $?

[B]

I. I can tell you. Paychecks is basically what I can tell you.

[A]

Average paychecks. Give me average paychecks.

[B]

So average PayCheck is like 1500 every.

[A]

Two weeks, net, as in that's what hits the account, net?

[B]

Yep.

[A]

3,000 hours a month.

[B]

Yes. So I used to be an andrologist.

[A]

Which is super near Florida. So this is near Orlando. So this isn't the cheapest in the world?

[B]

No, no. And I live on the beach.

[A]

You live on the beach?

[B]

I live on the beach in Orlando. I live like. Well, no, I'm outside of Orlando, so I'm over by Cocoa beach, so I'm about, like, an hour and a half away.

[A]

Oh, okay. She told me it was near Orlando before we started filming. Okay, so $3,000 net. Closest. It's in the middle of Florida. Okay. Okay, awesome. So how were you surv. Is there. Is there another side of this household in terms of income?

[B]

No. No. So I'm a mom with three kids.

[A]

Three what? Ages?

[B]

Possibly. I have a 12 year old and two 10 year olds. So preteens.

[A]

How the are you possibly surviving? There's no way.

[B]

Yeah, that's why I need your help. Like I'm not.

[A]

Well, there's not much I can do about making 3,000 hours a month on the beach of in Florida with three kids, other than go make more money. Change your career. I don't know what, what, what, what is there?

[B]

I've been.

[A]

Okay, tell me how things are going.

[B]

Retirement.

[A]

Pulling from retirement?

[B]

Yes. And I've pulled so much from retirement that I'll probably end up dying in Walmart.

[A]

So that's what I say.

[B]

Okay, I know. That's the point. Yeah, it's not sustainable.

[A]

How long have you been pulling for retirement?

[B]

Five years now.

[A]

From your own retirement that you saved up personally?

[B]

No, just retirement. Yeah, well, I have like brokerage. I have retirements and stuff.

[A]

But you didn't save up personally, you're saying?

[B]

Yeah. No. So I got an inheritance.

[A]

Oh, okay. Well, inheritances is okay. You're pulling from the inheritance.

[B]

And then I had a divorce.

[A]

Hold on, how much money did you actually have saved up? Because if we're using the word retirement in my brain, it's like, okay, this is what I worked for.

[B]

Okay, so what? I. Well, and I didn't even work for it either because my husband, my ex husband.

[A]

So $0. Okay. You never saved up anything in your life and you haven't earned anything. Okay, wonderful.

[B]

I started with 6,000. My dad made me put open a Roth when I was 16 and I put my babysitting money in it and I didn't.

[A]

Roth? Yeah, you can assume ira, but yes. All righty.

[B]

And then I didn't contribute again until I got married.

[A]

And then you get in the divorce?

[B]

I got half his retirement.

[A]

And do you get child support?

[B]

I do.

[A]

Well, that would be included in the income. Lady, what do you get?

[B]

I get 2150.

[A]

Well, we're talking about surviving. How would you.

[B]

Okay, I get 2150amonth.

[A]

Yeah, well, that substantially brings us to survival. Okay, so what the is the issue then? Why are we pulling from retirement? In this case, then that extra, that extra amount helps. That extra should help. Live on the beach.

[B]

It helps. Well, the beach is another like inheritance sort of situation. So I sold my childhood home and then took that.

[A]

Hold on, you sold your childhood home? The childhood home was given to you?

[B]

I inherited it.

[A]

Okay. Were you the only kid?

[B]

No, my sister inherited some other properties.

[A]

All right. Rich parents okay. Wow.

[B]

They actually weren't rich. We grew up very middle class.

[A]

Oh, shut the up.

[B]

Swear the. They were extremely financially responsible.

[A]

No, that's. No, no, no. They were wealthy. Maybe not rich. Private plan rich. No, but they were wealthy. Shut the up. Middle class. You don't know what middle class is. You've never heard of middle class. You've never witnessed middle class.

[B]

I am totally a middle class kid. I have my dad's paycheck.

[A]

Since the person who got inherited homes have sold them, got a big lump sum, half retirement from her ex husband and now a big inheritance from her parents. What the are you talking about middle class?

[B]

My parents bought my childhood home for 126 and I sold it.

[A]

Yeah, when?

[B]

For 405.

[A]

When 100 in 95.

[B]

But that's. We lived in it for 20 years. As they made more money, they.

[A]

Now it's a $400,000 house. I don't want to hear that. $450,000 house. They owned a house in Hawaii, so I don't want to hear it. Okay. Rich. Not rich. Wealthy. Fine.

[B]

So they did fine.

[A]

So what'd you do with that? To move on the beach, apparently. What did you do?

[B]

So I used to work in a very small field. Only job available in Florida after I got divorced was out in Melbourne, which is right next to the beach. It's not on the beach. But it's next to the beach.

[A]

Yeah. You're on the beach.

[B]

Well. And I said I wouldn't move from my really good area to over there.

[A]

Said I wish I could support my kids.

[B]

Yeah, well, at the time I could because I just moved houses like there was already equity in it. And then I just put the equity right back into a new house.

[A]

The issue. Well, what is your struggle?

[B]

I can't afford so.

[A]

No, you couldn't afford it then. What the f are you talking about?

[B]

Well lit. I need to enjoy right now because.

[A]

You need to enjoy right now. You have three children.

[B]

Yeah, but I'm probably gonna retire. I wanna retire around 50 and I'm probably gonna die at 52, so. So.

[A]

Yeah. What do you have?

[B]

Nothing. But my parents died.

[A]

What are you talking about?

[B]

My parents died at 53 and 52.

[A]

What they die with?

[B]

One was a heart attack and one was a stroke.

[A]

Okay. Take control of your diet and lifestyle.

[B]

Good. And it runs in my family. It's genetic. It's genetic.

[A]

Genetic. But you're probably not gonna actually die at 52.

[B]

Well, who knows?

[A]

You can't. Who else has died at 52?

[B]

My mom's grandmother died of a stroke at 42, so strokes run in my family.

[A]

Okay, that was also probably old, but long time ago.

[B]

Her parents were 90, so it's either 50s or 90s. And so I need to be able.

[A]

50S or 90s.

[B]

Exactly.

[A]

Talking about.

[B]

So I want to live nice if I die at 50, but then be safe so that if I make it to 90, I won't die in Walmart. So that's what I need help with.

[A]

Retire by 50. In what world? Possibly you said you're pulling from retirement. If you're polling from retirement your mint. There is no retiring at 50. That doesn't make any sense. The are you talking about?

[B]

Well, so so far my net worth has stayed stagnant.

[A]

Doubt we'll check.

[B]

I just filed for a child support modification and I realized why.

[A]

Because you're responsible with your own money. You.

[B]

So that's exactly what he says. And that's bull. Inflation. We negotiated that amount in 2020. Inflation is 10% over the past four years.

[A]

No, it was 8% one year. And then it basically has gone down to 3 every year.

[B]

But either way it's an increase. We negotiated that amount. My child support amount in 2020. He's getting in his.

[A]

Did you negotiate that amount?

[B]

We did negotiate. It is not.

[A]

You agreed to that amount.

[B]

We agreed to that amount.

[A]

So I.

[B]

So since he's getting well, I'm feeling a tremor. I knew this. Men are just like this.

[A]

No, no, no. I'm feeling. I'm feeling a tremor. You negotiated that account, that amount you negotiated and you agreed to it?

[B]

Yes.

[A]

Oh, my tremors. My tremors coming. Oh. Oh, that's weird. Okay, so would be the response.

[B]

He gets inflation, he gets cost of living adjustments with his salary. So why don't I.

[A]

That's his job.

[B]

So why don't I. This is my job. I raise his children. He sees them every other weekend.

[A]

You agreed to it. I'm not saying he shouldn't provide more, but you agreed to it.

[B]

Okay?

[A]

This was something you agreed to in the court of law.

[B]

And then circumstances change over four years.

[A]

Inflation literally always happens. Except for a couple deflationary.

[B]

That's why you're allowed modifications. You sound exactly like filing for.

[A]

But you did agree to this. You agreed. Yeah.

[B]

That's a perfectly fine amount in 2020.

[A]

Why not agree to with inflation adjusted?

[B]

Because now he knows that I over. He sees that I overspend and he thinks that I'm asking for my money for myself. And I'm not. I'm asking for more Money for his children.

[A]

Okay. Went out to eat a thousand dollars in this last month. Probably not gonna help your case. I'll be honest. I have three preteens, which requires going out to eat and not cooking for them.

[B]

I also cook. They eat me out of a house.

[A]

Okay. I saw $370 in groceries total.

[B]

That's like every week.

[A]

It's not what I got. We'll see. With the unknown shopping. We'll see. Some of those are a little hard to qualify.

[B]

All right.

[A]

There were large purchases. 4313. When Noah comes in. That's basically almost all your money.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Mm. And we'll determine what that is. Why the regardless would you get into a house you can't afford? That's you. That's your choice. And then you come a begging to renegotiate something you've already agreed to.

[B]

Have you. Okay. A begging. You are such a man.

[A]

But you're talking to you agreed.

[B]

Listen, four years ago when the entire world financial situation was different.

[A]

Oh, shut the up. There's one year of inflation. Calm down.

[B]

That's not one year. It's been. It's okay. You said steady three years since the 8% increase. That's still an increase.

[A]

There's inflation since the history of ever.

[B]

Yes.

[A]

So you think, especially once we got off the gold standard, you think that.

[B]

If I negotiate a price in 2020.

[A]

That it should be exactly negotiated Cost of living increase in that.

[B]

And we didn't, so.

[A]

Well, that was on you.

[B]

I'm filing. No, but that's on you.

[A]

No, listen, I'm okay with him giving more. I think he should step up and volunteer it. Personally, I think he should do that. If it's his kids and he's not splitting custody or anything like that. Yeah, absolutely. He should step up. You negotiated this.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

This was you.

[B]

And now I'm asking him to step up.

[A]

Yeah. That's you coming back to the table after the table's been set.

[B]

He gets a raise. He gets a raise for inflation. Why don't I. This is my job.

[A]

We did this.

[B]

This is my job. He agreed to a salary.

[A]

He agreed to a salary. And he is able to say, but I'll walk. What can you do?

[B]

I can walk.

[A]

You can walk and he can just give you zero. Yeah. I'm sure he would love that.

[B]

Yeah. And he could take the kids and see what it actually costs. Because I can tell you it's way more than $2,100 a month.

[A]

Would he agree to that?

[B]

Cuz your boss doesn't loves the kids.

[A]

Well, your boss doesn't have to agree to you walking. So I don't know what the you're talking about. It's a horrible analogy and it would hurt my heart.

[B]

It would hurt my heart. And he couldn't anyways with his job because he travels. But point is.

[A]

What the are you talking about? You're broken.

[B]

This is so difficult that you don't think being a mother is a job.

[A]

Who is saying this?

[B]

I put my career on hold. I was a stay at home mom for years and years and years. I've never suggested this while he upped his career.

[A]

Are you incapable of listening? Is that what happens once you birth a child? Listen?

[B]

Probably actually because here's the thing, you turn your ears off.

[A]

I specifically said I think he should step up and give more because of inflation.

[B]

But if you want.

[A]

Do you understand what I am saying? I am saying this is what you literally in the court of law agreed to. Yeah, who the are you to then go back and be like well, well, I agreed to something. Oh no.

[B]

The state of Florida allows. Allows a modification every three years.

[A]

Modification? Does that mean it is necessarily going to happen?

[B]

No.

[A]

Exactly. So yeah, go ahead and put in the petition.

[B]

I did.

[A]

Good. I'm not, I'm not disagreeing with putting in the petition, but you to sit there and complain that it has not followed inflation when you did not. Even though inflation has always the happened. You did not put in there. It doesn't matter that there is one year of higher inflation. There's one year of higher inflation consistently every couple decades. That is what happens. That is not necessarily a natural cycle, but that monetary policy is wild.

[B]

I didn't have to put it in. Or are you saying every three years I'm allowed to go back to the.

[A]

Economy hit your three years and now.

[B]

I'm going back to bond.

[A]

But you're complaining about it.

[B]

He controlled all the finances in the first place. So now that's why I can't live on the amount he gives me.

[A]

Girl, earning a budget takes like five minutes. That's just you being an irresponsible mother.

[B]

No sympathy on my tried before but it's always negative.

[A]

Well, that's because you don't make enough in your job. And you decided to live on the beach by the way. Have we forgotten this whole thing of her complaining about the guy not giving her which yeah, step up dude. They're your kids. You don't have custody. But either way, okay, chose to live on the beach. You got a massive inheritance. You Got half his retirement. You got to sell a home. You chose to live on the beach. You're choosing to spend a thousand dollars going out to eat a month. At what point does the sympathy go to zero? Because it's pretty damn close. Listen, if you were struggling, living in a sad, small apartment where they don't have room to live and you weren't spending money going and having fun, you didn't get a big inheritance. Yeah, I'd be like, let's make this dude that's making a lot of money, I'm assuming. I don't know, let's make him pay a lot more. Sure. But you have made life choices. Who the are you to then come back? Well, look at these choices I made.

[B]

Oh.

[A]

Oh, no.

[B]

Oh, no. Are you saying you've never renegotiated a contract ever?

[A]

Renegotiating a contract.

[B]

That's what this is. I'm renegotiating the contract.

[A]

I'm thinking. Because I actually don't think I have renegotiate. I am very, very, very, very specific and intentional about what legal contracts I get into. Again, I'm not, I'm not upset at the idea of going back for the three year thing that's in there for that reason. It is your whole, wah, I've made these life choices. I can't afford them, so someone else needs to save me. It's not about that.

[B]

And that is what he thinks. And that is not the truth.

[A]

But that is what your behavior did. You chose to live on the beach. You chose to spend a thousand dollars.

[B]

I keep saying living on the beach, but all I did was transfer my house to. I didn't actually spend more money on the house.

[A]

The house is the exact same cost.

[B]

Yes.

[A]

You got a $450,000 house on the beach of Florida.

[B]

I sold 403 and I purchased for 420. Absolutely.

[A]

Okay, then what's your issue?

[B]

So then insurance. I don't know if you know about the insurance market. So my insurance chose to live on.

[A]

The beach at 23 Hurricanes. Welcome to choosing to live on the beach in Florida.

[B]

And my taxes, my property taxes went up.

[A]

Welcome to owning a literal home. You chose to own a home instead of investing that money renting instead.

[B]

It would have happened whether they were on the beach or not.

[A]

Yeah, but you could have invested the money in the market.

[B]

I did.

[A]

Well, you bought a house with a.

[B]

And I did a lot of renovations. Listen, when I was married.

[A]

Sympathy meter.

[B]

Okay, okay, okay, okay. Let me tell you how I got there, though. When I was Married.

[A]

How you got there?

[B]

You drove that too. Okay, fair enough. I was driving an hour every day for work. I was putting 100 miles a day on my car. My kids were going to daycare at 6 o' clock in the morning and I wasn't coming home until 6 o' clock at night. Welcome to choosing to closer to my job.

[A]

You chose to bring children in the world. You get a master and I'm doing the best. You get three child tax credits on a yearly basis.

[B]

I actually don't because we negotiated. He gets half of it.

[A]

Oh, fair enough. You got half his retirement. You negotiated. You agreed to it. Why am I having sympathy is something you agreed to.

[B]

State owned a raid children. I deserved it. I know I'm not.

[A]

You agreed.

[B]

Well, I'm not reading.

[A]

I would also suggest that hey, guess what? She takes care of the kids, she should get all the child tax credits. I agree. She agreed to that not being the case. Your fault.

[B]

I know, I've thought about that.

[A]

So like what am I supposed to do? Cry with you?

[B]

So listen, hear me out. This is how I got to where I was.

[A]

So guys, it's just what a typical man saying that you should stick to a contract you agreed to.

[B]

When I complain about married. He took care of everything. So I never even knew how much money was in retirement, how much money I could get, how much money the kids cost. I. I never knew how much.

[A]

Why'd you guys get divorced?

[B]

Anything costs. We don't get along.

[A]

Okay, who brought it up, huh? Who brought up getting a divorce?

[B]

Me again. The parents dying screwed me over. I was like, I can't live my whole life being unhappy if I'm only gonna get to 52.

[A]

Sympathy meter going down.

[B]

I didn't wanna live unhappy. And I knew that I would be okay and the kids would be okay if I left.

[A]

Fast forward.

[B]

All right, so it didn't work out.

[A]

Okay.

[B]

But I think it can. I think if you.

[A]

I think it can if I go back and go get more money.

[B]

Okay, ignore that part.

[A]

It's not even that. But again, I again think he should. And that three year thing is there for you to take advantage of that. That's fine. That's fine. You have made life choices. You live on the beach. You chose there where insurance is higher, property taxes always go up. You chose to own property. That happens. You chose to spend the money you do on a monthly basis. We know what comes in. What did you spend last month?

[B]

No, I have no idea. 5,000.

[A]

What's the struggle? Why would you not know.

[B]

6,000.

[A]

Why would you not know?

[B]

Usually I would, but I carried a couple balances on my credit cards for the first time in a long time, so.

[A]

Why?

[B]

Because I didn't have the money to pay them off this time.

[A]

Except you spent a thousand dollars going out to eat.

[B]

Because my kids needed to eat.

[A]

Oh. We've lost access to stoves and ovens and sinks and refrigerators and knives and forks.

[B]

Well, now we need a food budget because I'm going to end up with that amount of child support forever anyways.

[A]

Why? Are you losing?

[B]

Nope. I dropped the modification.

[A]

What? Why?

[B]

So we can.

[A]

Why? It's there for you to take advantage of. I'm not even saying don't do it. It's why it's your complaint. I would.

[B]

We agreed to drop it because he gave me all his financial information and then asked for mine, and I don't want to give him my financial information.

[A]

What?

[B]

Because I'd rather go broke than have a man tell me how I spend my money.

[A]

Who asked for it?

[B]

My husband. My ex husband.

[A]

Did you have to provide it to request modification?

[B]

Yes.

[A]

Oh. Oh. Feeling a quiver. Feeling a quiver.

[B]

Well, I don't want to get. No. He's gonna say exactly what you say. If he goes through my finances, he's gonna say exactly what you say he's.

[A]

Gonna say because you blow all your money.

[B]

I'm not giving you more money to go blow it.

[A]

I agree. Because you bring in 5,150amonth and $10,000 went out. Go yourself.

[B]

$10,000?

[A]

$10,000?

[B]

On what?

[A]

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[B]

I know everyone says that. On what? I mean, I honestly, I don't even know what I spent on this month.

[A]

Whoopsie. Almost like I don't track my money because why would I take any responsibility? Instead just go ask for more money from other people.

[B]

I've never had to. I've never had to.

[A]

Oh, except. When did you guys get divorced?

[B]

Five years ago.

[A]

Oh, so you've had you for the last five years. Shut the up.

[B]

You sound exactly like him.

[A]

Well, maybe he's right. I mean, hold the on. Like what? Oh, don't make this a man versus a woman thing. It's not. We can have financial literacy. Whether you're trans, whether you're taking dick in the ass, whether you got tits. I don't give a solute.

[B]

But you don't understand child support.

[A]

The show doesn't discriminate on that. Money doesn't discriminate. You got a budget. Single mom, single woman, doesn't matter.

[B]

I want to. I want to.

[A]

30, 50.

[B]

How do you budget when you're always negative, though?

[A]

I have no idea how to budget you. Look, you add up where money's going. See what you can adjust. Sell the house.

[B]

I'm. It's not a good time. I'll lose money if I sell it.

[A]

Welcome to homeownership. You chose to do that. You may have over purchased you thought because you had cash.

[B]

So what most people don't understand, and I think this is important that people should know, is that when you first get your mortgage statement, when you're buying a home, they calculate your estimated tax and estimated insurance.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Based on the home's price as assessed that year. So it was assessed at 123 because the previous owner had Homestead. Well, when I purchased it, it was automatically. Yes, but it was automatically reassessed at the purchase price at 403.

[A]

Yes.

[B]

So suddenly my taxes went from like 2,000.

[A]

Did you have a realtor?

[B]

I did.

[A]

Did you have realtor?

[B]

Well, yeah. They didn't explain that to me.

[A]

Okay, you got a bad realtor, ladies and gentlemen. Get a good realtor before you do anything like this.

[B]

I was a realtor.

[A]

Okay, listen. Oh, for sake. Okay, I. I don't. I don't. I. I don't even know. This is just insane. And you're trying to make this like a. Oh, a man would say that thing. Who gives a. This isn't man versus A woman who money is money is money is money. It does not discriminate. This doesn't matter. Neither do contracts. Come on. What you agree to is what you agree to. And the three year thing is there is Florida law. So he doesn't really have a choice in that. And you don't really have a choice if you want to apply for that to then share your finances. This is it. This is not man versus woman. This isn't. It's not they versus them, but most.

[B]

I'm not giving her child support because she'll spend it on herself. I'm not spending it on myself.

[A]

Well, if you were, that would make me feel a little worse about giving child support as well.

[B]

I'm going to roll over my kids head. I'm giving them food.

[A]

Right. But again, that's not even the conversation we have because I don't even know if that's what's happening but because I don't understand, I go in blind with the audience. But you did spend double what you.

[B]

Make and I had no idea.

[A]

If you want to debate men versus woman apparently go to calepham.com apply. I'd be happy to have you on the show. What do you think your financial score is? 0 to 10. 0 being the worst, 10 being the best. 7 probably because of the retirement and home ownership.

[B]

Yeah. Okay, maybe six because I have collections.

[A]

Yeah. Okay. So if you want your hammer financial score, you get it for free. Get your financial score. It's free, it's Fun. Go to calebhammer.com or dollarwise.com Also remember, make sure if you don't want to be like a guest on this show, download our budgeting app. Take that free trial. Sign up for the annual version if you want to save money. And get our budget friendly cookbook signed by me directly mailed directly to you. And sign up for Dollar wise Central if you want all of our educational material and our budgeting premium app bundled together for 80% off Dollarwise.com check it out. You get it all for free. That is at least you get that. Okay, so a man's giving you something in this world. Okay.

[B]

Thank you. Oh, man gave me something. He gave me three kids.

[A]

You sure did.

[B]

That you chose to have that I love very much.

[A]

Great. Yep. And you chose to have them and you know, consequences and expenses. It comes with it. Is this. No. Why do I have. When we go. I don't. What the. What is this? 15,300 hours Painting from YouTuber when talking about this card. What does that even mean? I'VE never even seen a note like.

[B]

That to talk about this one. I had a little impulse purchase in January. A YouTuber that I love, that I followed for a very long time.

[A]

Who?

[B]

Baumgartner's Restoration. He does art restoration in Chicago. I've been watching him for, like, 10 years. He restored a painting. He sold it on ebay, and all money goes to Doctors Without Borders, so I. Oh, my.

[A]

Dude, you're literally begging for charity, and you're giving char for $15,300.

[B]

Yes.

[A]

So.

[B]

And the painting's worth about six to 800,000. But I can. I can claim a deduction on my taxes for the.

[A]

And not do a standard deduction.

[B]

No, no, I haven't done a standard deduction in probably nine years.

[A]

Yeah, makes sense with your wealth situation.

[B]

We got a lot of stuff going on. Had a lot of stuff going on. I'm pretty young.

[A]

Okay, so that was seven months of child support on one painting. And we are shocked, and we blame it on. Oh, he has a penis. How dare he have an opinion on money.

[B]

It came from a different account, though. Like, it didn't.

[A]

Okay. Seven months of his child support, went to a painting for charity.

[B]

It wasn't his child support. It was my money. My money went to a painting.

[A]

It was your money that you spent. Spent. But your money is the money that he also gives you. It's all intermingled. Doesn't matter where it necessarily came from. It's one big pile. You spent seven months worth of his child support, and we are surprised that he's a little.

[B]

He doesn't know about the painting.

[A]

Well, he sure does now.

[B]

I haven't told him I was coming on, so.

[A]

Does he know the show?

[B]

Nope.

[A]

Oh, well, you might be okay, then, I'm hoping. Hmm. Okay. Well, this card's insane. Capital one Quicksilver. Does this aesthetic even matter at this point? This. That is insane. Just this balance alone, it got her a little ridiculous this year, which is title this Nepo. I hope Nepo gets eaten by a Shark.

[B]

I really was middle class. My parents just saved really Well, I.

[A]

Hope a hurricane kills this Nepo. Cunning. Is that the title? It's probably not the title.

[B]

I think there's a tropical storm coming this weekend when I'll be on vacation, so I'll be on the other coast.

[A]

We were so close. $17,936.67. It was a. How I say, an insane balance. What the.

[B]

I have no idea. I honestly don't know what I spent my money on this month because what.

[A]

Is wrong with you? Why?

[B]

Well, because I've been carrying that balance, that fifteen thousand dollar balance from the painting. So I just kept thinking when I.

[A]

Saw what from January from six months.

[B]

Ago, I meant to put up.

[A]

What the are you doing?

[B]

I know you're out there.

[A]

You got a nest egg you're pulling from retirement. For what? For what? What are you talking about? Getting. It's only going up. It's only going up. So you're spending on it because minimum depayments without any purchases. That would go down. It would go down. It would go down.

[B]

And the reason I bought it on the capital one was to save 1.5%. And now I've been paying interest on it.

[A]

The cash back.

[B]

Yeah. And I've been paying interest on it. And that was my bed.

[A]

$341 in interest on a monthly basis. What the are you talking about?

[B]

I forgot to pay it off. I was like trying, but then it hurts my heart to take for my retirement. So I've been trying to kind of put it off and put it off. And then I've been watching your shows.

[A]

And I was like, oh, what did you take away from that?

[B]

That I need to pay off my credit cards so I don't pay interest.

[A]

Huh. Interesting. Our solution to do that is spend $5037 this last month. Not really what I have. Yes, lady. Not really what I advised in a previous episode. As far as I know.

[B]

I honestly, I honestly don't know. I really thought that was just the painting and then just like groceries. I have no idea.

[A]

Lady. What the is wrong with you? How do you not know? You swiped it. You swiped it. I understand. Maybe don't know the dollar amount. Maybe know the exact purchase. But how the do you not even know that this happened with this card? That the swiping wasn't even happening?

[B]

Because I thought I stopped using that one because the balance was so high. So I switched to my mx, which I got up.

[A]

Nope. I mean, nope.

[B]

I just don't know.

[A]

Certainly didn't stop spending on this, lady. Listen, how long does this take to pay off? The number one YouTube membership just got upgraded. And for this final week you can join for free. Three exclusive shows every day, Monday through Friday. Financial audit post shows exclusive and uncensored financial audit episodes. Our call in show Hammer it out. Well then take the train you and brand new shows fat and fatter. This I would go off brand behind the audit. This was wild. Shop smart. And now upgrading from one livestream a week to two. No other Channel offers what Hammer Elite provides. Join with the link in the pinned comment or description below. Submit proof of [e-mail] and we'll reimburse you for the first month with a $10 digital gift card that can be spent anywhere in most countries. Sorry, North Korea, this one isn't for you. Yeah, this is how we have to do a free trial on here because the platform doesn't currently offer free trials. It's okay. It's worth it. Yeah, it is. This is the final week to join Hammer Elite, the best membership on YouTube, for free. How long does it take to pay off seven years minimum payments without making any purchases? Seven years?

[B]

14.

[A]

Okay, 31. Listen, I don't know the Florida's laws necessarily, but the fact is, if you want to pass any of the assets onto your kids, they oftentimes have to settle your debts. Some of your debts, at least.

[B]

Yeah, but there's hacks to that. There's hacks to that.

[A]

There are hacks. There's hacks to everything with moving wealth. But the fact is it's not a perfect. Not a perfect thing. Death ain't a perfect thing.

[B]

No. And they don't technically have to pay it off because, well, unless they come for.

[A]

Well, there is the reality. In order for you to make your minimum payments, in order to continue having these, you are pulling from retirement. That is certainly not going to them.

[B]

Yeah, absolutely. Well, my retirement won't go to them anyways, like, well, unless I die at 52. But I plan on. I don't believe in generational wealth, so I. This was given to you on accident. My parents planned to use it all and never got there. That's the problem is I live in this world where I watch them just say, like, I'll wait. I'll wait. I won't go on vacation. I won't do this. When I retire. When I retire. When I retire. And then they didn't retire.

[A]

Yeah, but you Normally split between 90 and 50, so.

[B]

Listen, I know, I know.

[A]

Okay, what are you gonna do when the nest egg's gone then? If you plan to spend it before 52.

[B]

That is what I'm terrified of.

[A]

Okay, don't spend it before 52. Problem solved. Go back to Florida. What do you mean? Why aren't you adjusting? That's a very basic premise.

[B]

Yeah. Especially with all the tariffs and everything going on. I have no idea what's going to happen with stocks.

[A]

What the. Is tariffs impacting your. Oh, it. Stocks.

[B]

Everything is in stocks. My emergency fund is my brokerage it's.

[A]

Not an emergency fund. You don't know what the emergency fund is.

[B]

Why? It's the money that in case of an emergency I would pull it out.

[A]

But it's invested in stocks. Volatile stocks.

[B]

Yeah, well they're not volatile. Mostly do ETFs.

[A]

But yes it is. What ETF.

[B]

It's like spy and VO and spy alone.

[A]

When the tariffs initially were announced and went and went down like what a.

[B]

Massive percentage is why I finally sat down and was like I have to fix this because I am terrified.

[A]

Emergency fund is in the stock market. Emergency fund is in a high yield savings you title.

[B]

But I don't need a savings account. It's losing. It'll lose money. It'll lose. I even use.

[A]

Not necessarily high yield savings accounts are above inflation right now.

[B]

I had, I had one. I have some money in sort of one. It's not my money. It's complicated.

[A]

But what is it?

[B]

So it's a. It's the cash of my self directed IRA is currently in a high yield savings account earning 5%.

[A]

How much?

[B]

150,000. I think it's at 166 now.

[A]

What the fuck is your problem? Why. Why lose all this money? Why lose all this money on interest? I have no clue why this money on interest.

[B]

Can I touch that one? I don't know if I can touch. No, I can't touch that one. That's in the self directed ira. And then the IRS will come after me if I touch that.

[A]

Well, yes.

[B]

So I can't touch that.

[A]

I'm not even saying that. But I'm assuming there's so much more. Why are we accruing interest on a credit card in general?

[B]

I forgot.

[A]

Well, it's not that you can't touch it, but yes, you will face penalties.

[B]

Yes, I actually won't face penalties. I'll just have to pay income tax. Yeah, that's not a penalty. I mean I don't get after actually have to pay the penalties because my parents.

[A]

You mean the early withdrawal penalty? Okay, well the penalty being taxed. Yes, yes, but you still pay off interest. Your, your income tax rate is less than 30, which is what I assume this interest rate is.

[B]

Told you I meant to pay it off. I forgot. What I told you I meant to pay it off.

[A]

I forgot. I think your husband got very lucky ex husband.

[B]

And yes, his net wealth has doubled. I found out from the modification.

[A]

Yes, the classic net wealth. So you know. No, I think it's cause you're kind of a lying dick. Meant to Pay this off. Shut the up. You've paid this much interest every month this year so far. Meant to pay off. You've never almost paid it off once this year so far. That is a lie. It has accumulated $1,500 in interest this year so far. That is a lie. I don't want to hear it. What a joke.

[B]

The point.

[A]

What a joke. The points were like, hear that ever again.

[B]

Like 600. I've made 600 on that card. So I paid a hundred. I paid a thousand in 500. 1500.

[A]

What interest this year so far.

[B]

Okay. And I've made 600. So if I had paid it off like I was supposed to, then I would have been ahead. I just forgot.

[A]

But you did. You forgot for seven months. I just forgot for seven months. So I don't know. This doesn't make any sense. What are we doing? Oh, we got Google one.

[B]

I switched the American Express so that I wouldn't keep putting money on it. I thought I did. I don't know. I'll have to look at the statement. I'll look at the statement because I honestly, I don't know what I put on it.

[A]

How don't you care about what happens to your kids financial situation after you're gone?

[B]

They're fine. They have, they have an education fund and that's, that's all they need.

[A]

And how much is in it? Each.

[B]

Yeah, each one has 35,000.

[A]

Okay. Yeah. I mean, there's certainly definitely community college. And I mean, Most people borrow $40,000 in student loans. That's the median.

[B]

Their dad takes care of it. So it'll be good and safe.

[A]

Okay, so but you could set them up to open their businesses, fast track things. Maybe they get a quick step towards retirement.

[B]

Absolutely. I mean, if I make it past 50.

[A]

Yeah, but your money won't, according to you.

[B]

I'm, I'm. That's why I'm here. That's why I'm here is because I want to make sure it lasts and I want to be able to help my kids because my parents, even before they passed, before I received all this, they helped me. And I want to be able to help my kids when they need it.

[A]

Okay. You think you're gonna die in 12 years?

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

We did the math on your retirement, which is almost a million dollars. So what you got? Yeah, it's your current spending. It's gone in 10, it's gone in nine, it's gone in nine years. So that's before you even die at your likely unlikely death. So.

[B]

I used to have a higher income and I'm hoping for a higher income.

[A]

Hope or work for. What do you mean hoping for what is hoping for a higher income? I'm confused. Your spending is draining your entire nearly million dollars across the board in nine years.

[B]

I've been unemployed for a year and a half because I've been in nursing school.

[A]

No, you're still making money. 3. 3,000.

[B]

So I got a job over the summer.

[A]

So it's only for the summer. After the summer's done. You're.

[B]

Yeah, because I went to nursing school, so I was previously an andrologist. Okay. And do it again. Huh?

[A]

Do it again. Maybe. I don't know.

[B]

So I can't in nursing school. Wages are stagnant. I'm making the same exact amount that I made 12 years ago. So.

[A]

Girl, you think you're gonna die in 12 years? What is this, like, return? What is this return you're hoping to achieve? So what are you trying to do?

[B]

The most I ever made.

[A]

Oh, you seem like a nurse, too. Oh, my mother's a nurse, but she's nice.

[B]

I am very caring, very nurturing. Actually, I lied. I want to work in the OR because I don't like people, so at least I'll be knocked. But I still care for them.

[A]

So it's gone in nine years.

[B]

I still care for them.

[A]

It's gone in nine years. What are you doing in nine years? Because. Good. The.

[B]

I'm increasing my income.

[A]

Maybe.

[B]

Definitely.

[A]

I hope so.

[B]

Definitely.

[A]

Okay. How much nursing school is left?

[B]

One semester, one class, so I'm done in December. But all of the nursing school.

[A]

You're going to double your income because remember, you're doubling your spending from your income.

[B]

Not quite, but yeah, I'd be going from 60. Three was the most I ever made. And I would be if I work nights, which I already work nights. If I work nights, I can make up to like 104 starting.

[A]

And what about the kids?

[B]

Childcare. But he pays 70% of that, so kind of cuts my childcare costs.

[A]

Okay, so you'll just never see them?

[B]

No, I see them.

[A]

If you're working nights every day.

[B]

Yeah, but I don't go in until like seven.

[A]

Okay, so you'll see them for two hours?

[B]

Well, they get home at like four or five commutes. I just. The other job, it was like I was just doing semen all day and I was like, over it, so.

[A]

What? Nut?

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

What's wrong with nut?

[B]

Well, nothing, except it stinks. But it's a bit stinky.

[A]

Smells like pancake batter. It's true.

[B]

Pancake batter. Yes, that's nice. Rotten pennies. You know that smell on green pennies when you have green pennies in your hands?

[A]

Does not smell like metal.

[B]

Swear to God. Put it in a cup, close the lid, open it up in an hour.

[A]

No, thank you.

[B]

Well, that's what it smells like.

[A]

Okay.

[B]

Yeah, so I got tired of it. So I'll be in nursing school. It helps my income.

[A]

Well, even at your night school, net pay still doesn't get you to your spending allocation for how much you're spending.

[B]

107 won't do.

[A]

No, not after taxes.

[B]

With the.

[A]

The 21, you're spending $10,500 in a month.

[B]

But with the 2150, that brings me up to like 120.

[A]

After tax credits, of course. But I don't.

[B]

I get one, right?

[A]

That's right. Well, okay. Well, that's again, it's not gonna do much for net. Of course it is helpful. But for net. Okay, so after taxes, I'm gonna say you're.

[B]

And that's if I get a night job.

[A]

Yeah, that's if you do night. No, you're still dramatically under by a couple thousand bucks for your current spending. So this doesn't fix all your issues. This doesn't fix all your issues. Just not spending. I mean, listen, you're going in here getting Google one Canva. What you even need Canva? Joanne stores Domino's.

[B]

Oh, school. And it's right off school Domino's. No Canva.

[A]

Scrambled egg cafe. Got premium Texas roadhouse. Ebay.

[B]

They really like Texas roadhouse campus.

[A]

I don't give a. I like paying bills.

[B]

Is that my watch?

[A]

I don't know. I don't know how the would I know. I don't give a f. Amount.

[B]

I don't know.

[A]

Paying for ring a lot. Double ring. Double ring payments.

[B]

No, that's just that month. So it's a year.

[A]

Two. Twice.

[B]

If the year was twice.

[A]

Camp Linguar.

[B]

That's my kids camp. So that's a sweep up. A sleep away camp.

[A]

Well, great. That doesn't.

[B]

Their dad pays 70%.

[A]

So he paid you. He gave you money?

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

He gave you 70%?

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Okay, so then why the did you not put that towards your card? Because you certainly didn't. Now you're paying interest on it. Well, 28.24.

[B]

I don't want my irresponsibility to affect them. So I will continue to take on debt in order to.

[A]

What the are you talking about? No, no, that doesn't make any sense. If he gave you 70, why wouldn't you at least put that 70 towards this?

[B]

I haven't gotten it yet. He takes the sweet time.

[A]

This was.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

A month and a half ago.

[B]

Yeah, he takes the sweet time. I'm trying to get childcare costs from May and so it takes time. I'll get to it.

[A]

You'll get.

[B]

He'll get to it. He'll get to it.

[A]

Will he?

[B]

Yeah, eventually he does. He's. Like I said, he's really good with money. He pays everything.

[A]

Except for you.

[B]

That's true.

[A]

Why?

[B]

That's true. Well, he does. It just takes time. Why not pay him proof he wants me and then I have to sit down, I gotta find receipts. Fair enough.

[A]

You are an irresponsible creature. That is true. That is true. That's fair. That is fair enough. He's valid in that.

[B]

I think it's crap. I don't ask him for money.

[A]

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[B]

I've never asked him for anything.

[A]

Talking about child, not asking for money. Yep. But paying for the camp and everything. And you're asking for more money. Were but you're not willing to provide your finances.

[B]

Because he'd yell at me.

[A]

He'd yell at you. It doesn't matter. Would. Okay, here, let me ask you this. If you filed for that, you know, three year thing adjustment and you provided your statements. Doesn't matter what's in your statements. For it to be approved.

[B]

No, because I didn't just do it. But then he'll look, who cares? He Was already pissed off. I think. I think this whole thing stemmed because. No, no.

[A]

Does it matter? He'll get pissed off soon.

[B]

I got myself a Rolex for Christmas and he was there. And I loved the look on his face. But now what are you?

[A]

A revenge? Like, I'm so confused.

[B]

Yeah. He never bought me a single piece of jewelry except for my engagement ring. And so when I got myself the Rolex, which I had been looking for, clearly. Good.

[A]

Because his investment didn't pay off.

[B]

He is doing better without me, I will admit that.

[A]

Okay, well, I was just joking. Yes, but good for him. Good for guy.

[B]

He still sleeps with me though. So. Still sleeps with me though.

[A]

You. How frequently?

[B]

Three times a week. Two times a week. He lives in.

[A]

So that means nothing to me. I don't know when.

[B]

Okay, so he lives like two and a half hours away. So when I go drop off the.

[A]

Kids three times a week.

[B]

Well, well. And then I drive. I drive a lot for my job.

[A]

He doesn't have a girlfriend?

[B]

Not that I know of.

[A]

I thought you said he was living better off.

[B]

I think if I stopped sleeping with him, he would get a girlfriend.

[A]

Fair enough. He's probably just kind of enjoying that. Like, single for the first time in a long time, but he's still getting. He's still.

[B]

It's like the only time that we get along, so.

[A]

Oh yeah, it sucks. That's what sex is. It's like, yeah, you know, stick it in the butt. Let's go. So.

[B]

But the look on his face at Christmas was nice. I have it. You want to see?

[A]

Oh, kill me now. It's not even cute.

[B]

It's from the 1980s.

[A]

Wonderful.

[B]

It's so cute. It's got diamonds.

[A]

It means nothing to me. But I also don't care about watches. I have an Apple watch. Okay, so 1980s.

[B]

Woo.

[A]

Another inflationary high time. You gonna bring that up?

[B]

My dad bought one for my mom. It got lost after she died, so I wanted the exact same one.

[A]

Yeah, they were married. You're not. I don't care.

[B]

It was a deal I got on ebay.

[A]

Deal from who?

[B]

It usually runs like 5,200. And I got it on eBay for 4,000.

[A]

You don't have no money.

[B]

I saved $1,000. That's a lot.

[A]

Is this healthy what you guys are doing?

[B]

Is that like 20%? I saved 20%.

[A]

Isn't it. Is it not preventing you guys moving on it?

[B]

Absolutely. 100% is.

[A]

Okay, stop.

[B]

Why?

[A]

Go find. Go find some cobble beach.

[B]

So. I told you I Don't like people. I don't, I don't, I don't want to date. I'm not interested in dating.

[A]

You don't have to, dude. You're on the easy side.

[B]

That's what he says.

[A]

No, it's true. If you want to, you could just go.

[B]

But I don't wanna.

[A]

Oh, okay. Well, there you go. I was just gonna say, but I'm suggesting you guys just move on. Why aren't you moving on?

[B]

I, I don't have an answer for that. I mean, it's just easy, I guess. We've been together for like 22 years.

[A]

Why are you going on and off? Why are you diddling every time you personally?

[B]

Me personally? Yeah.

[A]

Why are you doing it? Why are you not moving on? This is not healthy.

[B]

I know I've asked chat like what I should do. I love chat. GPT.

[A]

Oh, I thought you meant chat. Okay.

[B]

No, no. I don't know. I, I, I honestly I can't answer that. I, it's just, it's easy. It gives me the comfort that I need without having to expose my children to anything. Let people know where at.

[A]

Martha listens to her favorite band all the time. In the car, gym, even sleeping. So when they finally went on tour, Martha bundled her flight and hotel on Expedia to see them live. She saved so much she got her seat close enough to actually see and hear them. Sort of. You were made to scream from the front row. We were made to quietly save you more Expedia made to travel. Savings vary and subject to availability. Flight inclusive packages are atoll protected.

[B]

Does the job?

[A]

Does the job okay? I don't know.

[B]

So it keeps us friendly when we're not. Because like I said, we've been on and off. So if we get in a fight after the Rolex, he didn't sleep.

[A]

What are you guys fighting about? You wanting more money but you blowing all your money on a four thousand dollar Rolex for no stupid reason.

[B]

So he slept with me and then at noon I got served with papers.

[A]

I like this guy.

[B]

So thanks, thanks. I was pretty pissed. I was pretty pissed.

[A]

That was a good day for him. One, two, punch.

[B]

Like if you, if you look at our text, I said, hey, are you down for a booty call? He's like, sure.

[A]

Oh my gosh, you guys are like 14.

[B]

I know. We always have been. It's been fun. We just don't get along, unfortunately. But then my next text was like, you face because, yeah, I got those papers.

[A]

So dude's on a mission. Dude has McDonald's pulling up via doordash when you're walking out the door. The watch was a gift for yourself. Yourself for quitting smoking. Congratulations. You're not trying to die as early. I don't give up.

[B]

And that is something I want to do. So I mentioned to your people, you need to do, like, a sponsorship with, like, a smoking cessation program or something, because every single person I see on here vapes or smokes or something, and it's $300 a month. Over $300 a month for me. I could. That's my car payment. I could pay my car payment.

[A]

You're doing that.

[B]

I know. And I want to quit.

[A]

So quit.

[B]

It's hard.

[A]

It is hard. No one's saying it's easy. I don't see you doing anything.

[B]

No. No.

[A]

Okay, so I want to quit. Yeah. I do nothing like. What the. And how would us having a sponsor even help that?

[B]

Well, you. Cause you give away, like, classes and stuff like that. It saves money.

[A]

Classes for quitting smoking?

[B]

No, but you do, like, the course things and the budgeting app and all of that.

[A]

All the good stuff.

[B]

And so if you had some kind of, like, smoking cessation program, that would save me $300 a month.

[A]

How about just don't get lung cancer and die early for the sake of. And grow the up.

[B]

I'm dying at 52 anyways.

[A]

Not necessarily, but certainly on your track. What do you think? Heart disease and stroke. Huh?

[B]

And I have high blood pressure.

[A]

Oh. Why don't you continue smoking those packs?

[B]

But I have nice teeth.

[A]

Huh?

[B]

But I have nice teeth. And actually, TSA took my toothpaste today. I'm pissed. I have to go get new toothpaste.

[A]

I don't give a.

[B]

Just saying.

[A]

Okay, Blue Cash. Tell me what's up.

[B]

No idea. What's Blue Cash? Oh, the Amex.

[A]

Yes.

[B]

So that's the one I switched to. So amex. I get 6% on groceries and 3% on gas.

[A]

It doesn't matter. You're getting $40 in fees and $30 and 25 cents of interest.

[B]

I forgot.

[A]

Why do you care about points? You forgot again. Again?

[B]

Yeah. No. That is the problem. Okay, so wait, you didn't even.

[A]

Hey. Is there a life here?

[B]

In here. Yes. That's the 40. What is wrong with you?

[A]

You're a mother.

[B]

I forgot. I forgot to pay the bill.

[A]

You forget everything other than to go suck your ex's dick three times a week. That's the only thing you remember?

[B]

That's spur of the moment. I don't have to rem. But I had like all I do, I just call them up and I'm like, yo. Like, I. I forgot. It's my first stupid.

[A]

What is wrong with.

[B]

They take off.

[A]

Yeah, but this is two cards in a row where you're just like. I forgot. They take it off the late fee shirt. But in terms of the balance and everything, this is your second card in a row. We're like, yeah, I just forgot. It's not cute. What is that? What the is that? Forgot? What do you mean?

[B]

And then I forgot about my other credit card payment.

[A]

So I backed your financially irresponsible and no one should give you money. I want to take child support away from.

[B]

You know, he would do better if he handled it.

[A]

Huh?

[B]

He would do better if he handled it, my ex. If he took the 2150 and like actually like allocated it properly.

[A]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Cuz you're a joke, man. If you're out there, I understand. It probably feels nice for a solid two minutes. Please stop sleeping with this woman.

[B]

Why? I'm.

[A]

Please. She just needs go.

[B]

He doesn't pay.

[A]

She just needs to go. Leave. Get her out of your life. Other than just.

[B]

It's been 22 years he's been trying. Literally. We've broken up and gotten back together so many times.

[A]

Get her out. Only see her on the exchange of children.

[B]

I'm addictive.

[A]

No, what are you talking about?

[B]

He loves me.

[A]

No, you him.

[B]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. I got nothing else.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

I've never stopped, so I don't know if he'd leave me if I stopped.

[A]

He would. I will speak for him. I will speak for him. May even get the minimum payment on the first card. 520. How the your irresponsibilities leading these minimum payments. You can't even come close to affording. And then on the blue cash it is $157.41. And what world are you paying these minimum monthly payments? Good luck.

[B]

I have no idea. Well, I'm okay. So I'm scaling back. I'm scaling back. I'm scaling back.

[A]

You're not. I have your stuff. You spend double what you make. Shut the up.

[B]

Well, I was gonna buy a Louboutin purse and chose not to. Oh, but now I'm getting the ads.

[A]

Okay. If two people mate and. And kids are born and they get separated, the primary caretaker should get the child support. The other person, the primary caretaker should get the child tax credits. If that person goes blows all their money on Louis Vuitton painting in A Rolex. That money should be taken away. That money should be taken away and the kids should be given to the other person.

[B]

First of all, they can't be. I'm an awesome mother. They can't be because he travels all the time. That's how he makes all his damn money.

[A]

Yeah, it'd be. Just take them. Them going with him would be a better life.

[B]

Listen, I use my money. I do not use child support.

[A]

No, do not understand that. It all goes into a pile. Doesn't matter if you calculate. Yes, I use this. No, if you use this $1 from pulling from retirement. If you're putting. You're putting this on a credit card. This credit card gets paid in the checking account. Where your retirement pull gets from and where your child support goes as well.

[B]

And I do want to fix that, but. But like I want to get to a point where it's just my income and child support are completely.

[A]

Yeah, you've done nothing to do it. So I don't give a. You've done nothing to do it. It takes 13 years to pay off getting Wendy's breeze through mini mart. Getting some bullshit Breeze.

[B]

There's a cigarette. Huh? Breeze through the cigarettes.

[A]

Yeah, let's. Let's smell like for the rest of our lives. You're right.

[B]

It does. It stinks. Yeah, I want to.

[A]

I'm surprised someone even is sleeping with you. Panera Bread. Dunkin Donuts.

[B]

Shower before.

[A]

No, Trust me, that does not fix everything.

[B]

I know he won't kiss me.

[A]

Yeah. You're disgusting. Dunkin donut. Siffer products. McDonald's Breeze through mini mart again. More cigarettes. Every second of our life.

[B]

Cigarettes.

[A]

Cigarettes. Cigarettes. I want to quit. Does nothing to do it. Shut the up. Double hoagies. Cigarettes. Cigarettes. Wendy's cigarettes. Dunkin Donuts. Cigarettes. Cigarettes. Peacock. How many? What?

[B]

How many packs, food and cigarettes.

[A]

What do you got? How many cigs?

[B]

For 15 years I was a pack and a half a day. Or. No, no. A pack and a half every two days. Now I'm at a pack a day.

[A]

What is wrong with you?

[B]

I know you're a father. Nursing school cigarettes.

[A]

Shut the up. Swear. Other people go through nursing school without killing themselves. Shut up.

[B]

That's true. A lot of nurses smoke, though.

[A]

A lot of people kill themselves. Yes, a lot of people do a lot of bad things. A lot of people make horrible life choices. That does not mean you do.

[B]

You're right.

[A]

Cigarettes. Cigarettes. Cigarettes. Man. Denny's vending cigarettes. Cigarettes. McDonald's cigarettes. Wendy's cigarettes. McDonald's cigarettes. Late payment. There it is. Interest accruing like crazy. Two late payments this year so far. So she forgets. She endlessly forgets.

[B]

Are the trips on this card.

[A]

It's gonna suck when you forget to take your kid out of the car and you go inside somewhere one day. Okay. All you do is forget.

[B]

I do. I think the trips are on this card, so.

[A]

What card?

[B]

No, the camps on the. Didn't you just go through the mx? Yeah, I use the mx.

[A]

I can see it in the color of your skin.

[B]

What?

[A]

Your smoke. No, I absolutely can.

[B]

I've had people tell me it doesn't look good.

[A]

It does not look healthy. I can see it. You're killing yourself. Well, absolutely.

[B]

I spent 6,000 on a face peel, so hopefully that'll go away.

[A]

6,000?

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

And appeal.

[B]

It's like a CO2 peel, so it like, literally takes off the entire top layer of your skin. So I don't need Botox or anything. Every three months. It lasts for like 10 years.

[A]

Okay. Lindsay's given a question. Questionable. On it. And I trust her. For skincare.

[B]

CO2 laser.

[A]

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. We know what it is. But you also look like you're kind of dying a little, so. I mean, the cigarettes are not just doing very well. For your face.

[B]

Absolutely. They're not. Yeah.

[A]

For your lungs.

[B]

Nope.

[A]

You're gonna age like that.

[B]

I know.

[A]

And you're a facial person. And peel. When. When you're doing a pack a day. What the are you.

[B]

And sun damage.

[A]

Yeah, it's not gonna do anything. You're killing yourself.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Three, six thousand hour. When. When was that $6,000 peel?

[B]

In May. Like I'm surprised it's not on here. I paid for it.

[A]

I don't have your May purchases, you tit. Oh, we're in June or July.

[B]

Oh, my bad.

[A]

You titan about May. I don't know.

[B]

Well, it was in May, but I had to cancel it, so now I have to reschedule it, so.

[A]

But you still paid for it.

[B]

I still paid for it.

[A]

So you're just draining your retirement to get peels and watches and paintings and traveling. This is so stupid. What is wrong with you? You are a mother. Barely.

[B]

The traveling's for the kids.

[A]

Shut the up.

[B]

It is. It is.

[A]

So you could give them such a better life.

[B]

What's better than going to international trips every single year?

[A]

Every single year, setting them up for success.

[B]

I have. They have an education fund.

[A]

Education fund? That isn't honestly fully funding a four year institution. That is for sure.

[B]

It's 30,000 at 10 years old and it's invested.

[A]

You're right. That will, that will probably get there for what it's worth. But you could help them open a business. You could help them put the down payment on their first house. You could help them in so many ways that no many other people do not get to do. But you're just like, you know it. I'm gonna have fun. That's where you're at. Amazon card. The is going on with this Amazon.

[B]

Amazon is just my Amazon purchases and doordash.

[A]

Doordash? Why? Why on an Amazon card?

[B]

Oh, because I lost my cards.

[A]

Yeah, well, this one's paid off every.

[B]

Month in Japan and so.

[A]

But you did spend $941, which is insane for your income. That is a fifth of your income. And it's all on Amazon. Amazon Prime Video, Doordashing gold and something. Amazon doordashing, Wendy's. I don't give a f. Your kids would probably love a down payment if once they get a house. Doordashian, Firehouse Doordashian, Wendy's, Amazon, Amazon Shop the up door dashing number one Amazon. DoorDash and Wendy's. Doordash and Wendy's. Amazon. Amazon, Amazon, Amazon, Amazon, Amazon. Huh.

[B]

I got a fish like just like you have one.

[A]

Let me guess, you're just using an investing app that doesn't invest in you. It is time to change that. Right now Webull is offering up to a 3.5% match when you open an IRA with them. That is real money going into your retirement, not just points or coupons. And that's just the start. Deposit $100 and you get 30 days of Webull Premium anywhere from 2000 to $10,000 sitting around in your account. Move it to Webull and get $200 in cash. And if you worked your way up to $5 million, that's $30,000 in your account just for moving it over. It is not just about the perks though. Webull provides the tools that serious investors want as well. Trading view integration, real time data, zero commission trades. It actually works on all your devices. And now through September 30th, you can stack even more. Get a $100 cash bonus for every $2,000 deposit, plus a 2% cash back on all deposits and a 30 day premium voucher and a 4% APY booster on any uninvested cash. It doesn't get better than this. So stop overpaying for a platform that gives you nothing back and make the switch to Webull. Go to webull.com kaleb or hit the QR code or the link below. Let's get back to the show. Oh, you don't deserve anything. Pull out your phone. Pull out your phone. I don't want to. Pull up Amazon. Pull up Amazon.

[B]

I don't even know what I bought.

[A]

Shut up.

[B]

I still have stuff.

[A]

Just pull up Amazon.

[B]

I need to.

[A]

You don't have to fill the air with words.

[B]

Why not cut.

[A]

Shut the up Deal.

[B]

Yeah. God, I don't even know.

[A]

Can't even afford a nice phone when you're spending this all on.

[B]

That's a very nice phone. I like and I. I keep my phones for a long time. It's a Samsung Note.

[A]

Means Nothing to me.

[B]

IPhone is garbage. If you want to keep.

[A]

Sure, maybe. But about all Androids. This looks like a piece of.

[B]

I really like that phone.

[A]

No, it's performing okay for on the scroll test. Okay. Yeah. Some bull for.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

So I sort of do groceries, toothbrush, batteries. Endless batteries. Okay. We do not need to get an aquarium. That is an expensive hobby because a lot you've cut. She spent a lot on that. Pumps and food.

[B]

And I watched a tetra gasping for air and I immediately had to go and get.

[A]

Yeah, maybe you shouldn't have it. How long did you have it? Did you put it in the day you made your tank?

[B]

Two weeks? No, my beta was in there. Yeah, my beta was in there for like three months and then I put a couple tetras in there for her to play with and.

[A]

Well, it probably wasn't adjusted then. It probably didn't have the adequate plants and.

[B]

Yeah, no, it totally does. I almost took a picture for you because I saw yours.

[A]

It's gasping for air. I don't know.

[B]

I think it just air pump so the other ones are fine.

[A]

Yeah, I know Now Indian almond leaves for betta fish. What the is wrong with you? Leggings. Cute pants. Yes. You just can't afford it and you're begging for more money. Shrimp cave.

[B]

Oh, I got shrimp. But she killed them right away. So she used this to cover the scents when I'm working.

[A]

Shut up.

[B]

What?

[A]

H2CO2 aquarium background thing.

[B]

Told you.

[A]

Told me what? That you got a fish tank. I believed you. Yeah, I wasn't questioning whether or not you got a fish tank. Beta fish. Bull. Dumb dumb bull. Landscape fabric. Dumb bullsh. Zip ties. This is a lot of spending that you definitely don't need. And it's actually. This is less than a month the plotty's board off. I haven't opened a flat Survival stuff. I love the hobby. But you do not need it. Your money is gonna run out before you even think you're gonna die. This is a joke. And that's even with your income boost. Honestly, because you're spending well, more than you make. KSLO's cards paid off every month. But you.

[B]

I forgot.

[A]

You're a moron.

[B]

I rarely use it. I rarely.

[A]

You're a moron.

[B]

I know that one. I take full.

[A]

What's wrong with.

[B]

So that one is now on autopay. Because I heard your voice in my head. It's disgusting. So I put it on autopay.

[A]

Fucking superfans.

[B]

Listen, I like your show.

[A]

This makes no sense. You made the smallest purchases in the world. And the minimum monthly payment would have taken care of it, but then you had a late fee. Cause you can't deal with anything. You have no ability to be responsible. Hmm. What a joke. What a joke on something so little. It's so stupid. All right. What is this?

[B]

There's a lot going on.

[A]

What?

[B]

Oh, my God. I go to nursing school. I have a job. I have three kids.

[A]

Okay. In nursing school right now. It's summer. You swap both. They are not at the same time, so do not name them at the same time. Shut the up. You have kids. You chose to bring them into the world. That's what happens. Every parent has kids. I don't know if you know this. Okay, Congratulations. So you have kids, Kids. You're working. Yep. No other parents do that. What else is going on other than your yearly world travels and sucking three times a week?

[B]

I don't suck. It's for poor.

[A]

No wonder you guys got divorced. Oh.

[B]

Fair.

[A]

For poor people.

[B]

You've never heard that? It's a Paris Hilton quote.

[A]

No, I'm not. It's kind of a dick thing. Is it?

[B]

What a quote? Yeah. Paris Hilton said she doesn't suck dick. Only that's for poor people. When her sex tape came out.

[A]

You're on your way. Oh, no. We have to go on a yearly vacation. Oh, what else?

[B]

Takes a lot of planning.

[A]

Shut the up. What else?

[B]

Especially with childcare.

[A]

Shut up. What else?

[B]

I don't know. So that was it.

[A]

Well, you said a lot is going.

[B]

On and Work, work.

[A]

No, not at the same time. Not at the same time. Incorrect lies. Shut up. Up and correct. Am I nicer yet because I'm in a relationship? Shut the up.

[B]

No, you're not.

[A]

Damn right. So that was a excuse. Great. Okay. Yeah. You just want to enable yourself endlessly to make just. You just Want to essentially excuse all your misbehavior. It's ridiculous. What's your car? 2022 Ford Escape tape.

[B]

It's a phev though.

[A]

What does that mean?

[B]

So it's a plug in hybrid. So I saved money on.

[A]

Yes. Yeah. And what's the interest rate on this car?

[B]

I don't know. I thought it was 12, but I think it's a lot.

[A]

But you save money on gas. 12 interest you, dude, I don't think it's 12.

[B]

I don't think it's 12.

[A]

I don't know. You'd be the one that does. You'd be the one that does. You're lucky you have equity in this car.

[B]

I have a lot of equity.

[A]

Probably thanks to the guy I have.

[B]

The guy? What guy?

[A]

The ex?

[B]

No, I paid for that with my own money. I paid half down 50%.

[A]

Your parents money. Okay, $14,415. Yeah. You've no, you've earned nothing in your life.

[B]

You're right.

[A]

You own $4,000.

[B]

4,000. 4,000.

[A]

4000. Great. $14,415.18 is what the car is owing on a 12% interest rate. Maybe 23,000 is its value. But a $483 minimum payment. It's not even about the car having equity. It's about the fact that you have a minimum that you cannot afford. Because you can't afford. If you cannot afford your minimum payments, why are we having all these high balances on cards and not even thinking about them? Wipe them. Wipe them because your market return is not the 30% that you were paying in interest. Wipe them. And probably pay off the car as well if it's 12%.

[B]

So I did the math and it is 30% in the last year and a half I have made.

[A]

No, that is one year. That is not a rolling average. That is not a rolling average. You actual creature. That is not a rolling average. You're getting 10% on average probably.

[B]

I can't tell what my rolling average is because I keep taking my said.

[A]

It's in the SP S&P 500 ETF. It's a 8 to 10% rolling average.

[B]

It's not just spy. I'm in Google. I was in Tesla.

[A]

Okay, maybe 12%. That is your rolling average up your down years combined. Tesla's flat over the past few years. So what the are you talking about? All I know is it is not beating our credit card on average. Because the credit card will stay the same. Those stocks will not. Next year might be a down year. You don't know. You don't know.

[B]

You're right.

[A]

This episode is brought to you by Lifelock. When you visit the doctor, you probably hand over your insurance, your ID and contact details. It's just one of the many places that has your personal info and if any of them accidentally expose it, you could be at risk for identity theft. LifeLock monitors millions of data points a second. If you become a victim, they'll fix it, guaranteed or your money back. Save up to 40% your first [e-mail] podcast terms apply.

[B]

It's gambling. Sort of.

[A]

Gam. What? No, it's this interest occurring that's not gambling. What are you talking about?

[B]

I mean in the stock market, it's sort of gambling. I don't know, I could lose it tomorrow. I can lose every single dime tomorrow and all of my money.

[A]

All I'm saying is you know for a fact this is occurring 30% in interest and the car is 12% which is over the historic market returns on the up years, down years combined basis. Just pay them off and then budget. You can't afford minimum payments. You need to go no minimum payments and then live on an incredibly strict budget because you're a mother.

[B]

I need to figure out how to pay them. I don't know what to pay them from.

[A]

Pull and you pay. How have you been pulling so far?

[B]

So I've been pulling from my inherited account because I don't have to pay the penalties, but I also have a brokerage that I can pull from, but then I pay capital gains.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

So I'm not sure which ones to.

[A]

Pull it from long term though. Probably.

[B]

What? Oh, yeah, yeah, long term. Yeah. I haven't made any trades in a long time, so I don't know which one is better, like I don't know tax wise, like which one I should pull from and then, but either way.

[A]

Honestly, with most, you're probably going to get a return on investment either way with this. Maybe not with the car. Honestly, maybe not with the car, but with the credit cards. Yeah.

[B]

Say that again.

[A]

Either account you pull from with the 30% interest rate on the card, you will probably get a return on the investment from either account you pull from the car. Not 100% sure.

[B]

I was.

[A]

Especially if we don't really know the interest rate. You said it's probably 12, but now you think it's lower. I don't know.

[B]

I think I, I mean, I think I gave you, I think I gave you the.

[A]

I'm have it.

[B]

I think I know. I, I, I Might have forgot.

[A]

Yeah. These lucky kids.

[B]

I am actually a really good mom.

[A]

Yeah, but you forget everything.

[B]

Not perfect. But I'm.

[A]

No one is. No one would suggest that you should be because it's impossible. But you forget everything.

[B]

I do, I do.

[A]

And then you think it's cute, like shut the up.

[B]

I don't think it's cute.

[A]

Well, yeah, I forgot. This is like your thing. It's your catchphrase.

[B]

I'm working on it. I'm working on it. So I've got notes set and stuff so that this doesn't happen.

[A]

Did you get the largest chunk of the portfolio?

[B]

What do you mean?

[A]

Retirement? The portfolio. From your parents. I know we split some houses. Why'd you get the most?

[B]

Oh, from my sister. No, we split it evenly. Oh, so all of the accounts went half and half. And then her parents were wealthy. No. And then the property. The property we divided based on equity. And then she bought me out of one of the properties, which is that money went into my kids education fund that funded that. She's a doctor. My sister's a doctor.

[A]

I don't give a fuck.

[B]

She doesn't have to worry about all that. That's just fine.

[A]

It doesn't matter. You could be a high earner and be even more financially irresponsible. That means nothing. Me, Sally May.

[B]

So I knew we were going to get there and I want to explain my. I want to explain something before you yell at me.

[A]

Okay.

[B]

The way I thought about this was that I'm making more in the market than I would if I pulled the money out of the market to pay cash for my school.

[A]

But that's literally incorrect. It's 13% interest. This. Your market's getting 10.

[B]

I started school in January of 2024 and I have made $30,000.

[A]

You have made. But that mathematical equation is incorrect. Cuz on average, again, this 13% is not changing. On average, you're getting 10%. You t. You got lucky with the market. You were not able to strategically plan that you got lucky with the market. It could have completely done the opposite as well. Yes, but no. On average. Especially with how long this loan's gonna last. No, you will. In the most likely circumstance. In the most likely timeline, you will lose more having this than in the market on a historic basis. 13 or 10, what's higher?

[B]

I know, and that's why I needed help. Because I think I have great ideas. I need help.

[A]

What the fuck are you talking about? Well.

[B]

Cause I think I have great ideas.

[A]

That's why it'd be convoluted and wild. Just follow basic. Okay. Okay.

[B]

It wasn't basically at the time I saw my account.

[A]

You get as the guest on the show you get access to $Y Central which has all of our educational programs. From debt from budgeting from investing to recession preparing to careers to the basics to everything. You get all of it. Take all of our educational programs and use the premium version of our budget app. You get it for free. You guys all get it for 80% off [e-mail] but you get it for free. So take advantage of it. And that at least helps understand this. Okay. In fact we're doing like a a basics class right now for people that are just getting started and it explains this literal exact thing when it comes to what's good, bad, bad debt. This is bad debt.

[B]

I thought it was good debt.

[A]

Well, it's not even close to good debt. Okay, so Sally me you when did you borrow this? Cuz it's.

[B]

I started taking out in January of 2024.

[A]

Oh me. Okay. Yeah, it hasn't moved. $19,851.50. When's the last time you took a a draw a borrow you passed due you. I forgot.

[B]

I did. I really did. I really did actually. And this one, that's a whole nother thing but I really did because I'm doing interest only payments right now. So I really did auto pay exists. But if I auto pay then I over risk, then I overdraw because I forget to move money.

[A]

Then we don't go on vacation, then we don't go out to eat if we're out.

[B]

It's not that I can't afford it, it's that I forget some money. No money.

[A]

Can't afford it. You're pulling from retirement. That's not affording it. You can blow through the nest egg if you want, but it's not going to take you to the end of life. Most likely continue a pack a day.

[B]

Maybe, but that's fair. It's not a joke. I didn't know it would run out in nine years. I hadn't done the math so that makes me sad.

[A]

Okay, there's how much exists there, give it a 10% return and divide how much you pull from it on a yearly basis. And it's very easy. That would have taken you about 30 seconds for nine years of pain. Your lack of being able to do anything and endlessly forgetting is astonishing. Almost impressive.

[B]

Thank you.

[A]

Yeah. If I didn't hate your guys cuts. I don't Hate you but it's ridiculous. Your minimum monthly payment is 20455. Of course you're behind so this is ridiculous. 204.55.

[B]

I really don't want you to turn the page now.

[A]

What then?

[B]

I don't even know what to say. I've got nothing to say.

[A]

You did all this within a year?

[B]

Year and a half.

[A]

That's she has another $43,997.34 in Sallie Mae debt.

[B]

And I think that one's late too.

[A]

No, but it probably is at this point.

[B]

Oh, then that one's on autopay. I knew I had one of them on autopay.

[A]

Oh my. You're absolutely ridiculous. 43,000. What school are you going to? What are you borrowing from?

[B]

So it's an accelerated program. I'm getting my bachelor's in 16 months.

[A]

This is still insane though. Your bachelor most people median borrows 40,000. You're well above that and two loans combined.

[B]

40,000, which is the federal is for school and this Federal?

[A]

I haven't even gone to federal yet.

[B]

Yeah, I told you not to turn the page that the Sallie Mae is to live off of so I don't have to pull it from my retirement.

[A]

I'm living off of Sally May. Not living off of May. That cut that Sally ass whore.

[B]

My cash makes more money.

[A]

Shut the up. That is not true on our and.

[B]

I've learned that now. Shut up.

[A]

Oh, you're a tit. You're a tit. You're a tit. You're a tit. You're a tit. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm crashing out. I got it.

[B]

I got it back.

[A]

I got four hours of sleep last night. I'm very tired so I'm kind of crashing out.

[B]

I'm not one of those ones that's like, oh well it'll go away. Like I plan on paying all the back.

[A]

No, but you're equally with what you've done. Sorry.

[B]

You throw worse fits than my kids.

[A]

Because they don't know how moronic their mother is.

[B]

Oh yeah, they do like me.

[A]

Yeah, their fit. If they knew this is they would swim into the ocean and never come back.

[B]

I hope they don't have to take student loans.

[A]

If they do what you do, they will.

[B]

Well if there's. If their money's making more in the market.

[A]

Quiet now.

[B]

Kidding. That was a joke.

[A]

Quiet. Hush now then hush. This is never gonna get paid off with its minimum payment of 2. What the fuck are Those.

[B]

It's interest only.

[A]

Go smoke a cigarette and die in 12 years. Shh.

[B]

Then my kids will get money.

[A]

Not the retirement, not your portfolio. $238.31. So how's a beach house? Four hundred and fifteen thousand hours. That doesn't make sense. Is it a condo? It's a house on the beach.

[B]

Four bedrooms.

[A]

Literally on the beach.

[B]

No, no, no. I live like two or three blocks. Three blocks from the beach.

[A]

Okay, on the beach.

[B]

Shut the barrier island. I have to cross the bridge. It's on beach side. We're beachside.

[A]

We're not on the main. The beach. Shut up. Shut up. On the beach. You don't know what the. Yeah, yeah. Cuz you're not on the beach. You're not on the beach. Off beach. You're not on the beach. Don't give yourself that privileged. Beach. Off beach. You're not on a beach. You're not a beach.

[B]

Fine, I'll sell it and I'll go get one on the beach.

[A]

Shut the. If you can't afford a single dick. Shut up. That makes no sense. Okay, here's a mortgage. And here it is. And is this at a great.

[B]

It's at a very good rate. I thought you bought a house. Stuck in the house forever.

[A]

No, no, no, no. I thought you said you brought in a fucking cash.

[B]

No, I bought. I put 40% down.

[A]

Okay, well at least. Is that a good break? I moved $225,612.

[B]

Yeah, for a house near the beach.

[A]

Near. Thank you for correcting. Okay, don't give yourself that privilege.

[B]

I have sand in my front yard.

[A]

Buy it now. $2,040.24. Yeah, it's not a. It's not a bad house. Listen, but you said. So Jude. Lose. But you mean by. Lose money from your purchase price. But you wouldn't be underwater. You wouldn't have to come up.

[B]

No, my house isn't underwater. But like this.

[A]

Quiet.

[B]

Now I won't be able to afford a house.

[A]

You be quiet.

[B]

How are you gonna get that quiet now?

[A]

Okay, Collections. What is wrong with you?

[B]

Having collections, that is.

[A]

I forgot. I forgot, I forgot.

[B]

No, no, that is principal people. I'm leaving that on a trip.

[A]

This Thursday.

[B]

Yeah, I've got Wiki Watchy coming up. That was my sister's idea.

[A]

Did you just call me?

[B]

It's a town called Wiki Watchy. It has mermaids. Yeah, so what world am I living in?

[A]

What world am I living in?

[B]

My. It was my sister's idea. I said I'd pay for half. So we're going scalloping. It's on the other coast. It's still in Florida.

[A]

I give up. I give up. Let's switch to communism or fascism. I don't care anymore. Let's go to one of the extremes. We're done. I'm canceling this country. We have failed. We have failed. I don't care which way we go. Take all my money or give me all the money. I don't give a. We're done. We've lost it. People like this, our mothers. Oh, we're done. Oh, for which you watching Mermaid Wickshaw? Why can watch you. Shut the up. I don't care.

[B]

It's their summertime. It's my kids summer.

[A]

It's everyone's summertime. Shut the up. That doesn't mean we have to kill ourselves. You heard.

[B]

I'm not taking a plane. Like it's just in Florida.

[A]

Shut up. What is this? More collections for?

[B]

I told you, it's on principle. I hate the medical field.

[A]

Medical bill in your credit. Actually, Yes. A court struck down the rules. Yes, because the fec. I don't remember. No, no, no, no, no. The Protection Bureau, if I'm not mistaken, they put in a rule that limited what could be reported on your credit when it comes to medical collections and what would be due. The court said. No, no, no, you can't do that. Congress must do that.

[B]

Are you talking about the cfpb?

[A]

Yes. Oh, yes, thank you.

[B]

Yeah, I heard about that.

[A]

However, I still think it's above $500 if I'm not mistaken. And these aren't. However, it's still. It's throwing up on your experience. Well, maybe it's cuz it was before that rule was enact, not enacted. But not cast either.

[B]

Whatever. Yeah, yeah. I don't know.

[A]

Okay, what is this? Stiffle, stiffle, stifle.

[B]

So I don't know which one you're looking at. I have multiple accounts.

[A]

$6,000. That's not going to last us more than a half a month. 161,000. That will.

[B]

This is my retirement. This is my money. This is non ex husband, non parents.

[A]

Oh, he is so lucky he gets to say the word X man.

[B]

I think I am.

[A]

I want to shake his hand. 161,000 in this. This is your. That Roth. Blah, blah, blah, blah, blah.

[B]

But what. 161,000 in the Roth. What? What is. Does it say they.

[A]

Does it say what?

[B]

Oh, they blocked it off.

[A]

Yes. We're protecting your privacy.

[B]

I know. I have Well, I have two there. One is a managed fund, which I do, actually.

[A]

Here's an inherited IRA. This is the 158th. So the other one must be your.

[B]

So the other one is a self directed ira. Okay, well, so that was invested in.

[A]

This has gone down from a hundred, basically 200,000 hours to $158,000.

[B]

Was that Schwab?

[A]

Yep.

[B]

Yeah. I, I, I don't know. I want to say I transferred it somewhere or whatever, but I don't think so. I think I spent it.

[A]

I just don't know why you do. Why, why, why, why? 179 in this inheritance, two inherited IRAs.

[B]

I have one Roth, one traditional.

[A]

Oh, okay.

[B]

And then I have an inherited one that's managed.

[A]

Here's the traditional. It went down from 238,000 to 179.

[B]

That's.

[A]

We're throwing away everything. All the work our parents did with.

[B]

Throwing away. Oh, so one of them is actually my father. Actually, no. It's only. The only thing in that account is Apple. That's it. He bought apple at $7 a shift. Congratulations. In 2000. One down, and I've left it there.

[A]

All right. Another Schwab one down from 108,000 to 80,000. Ladies and gentlemen, we're winning the game.

[B]

That's my emergency fund.

[A]

When everything goes the buy high, sell.

[B]

Low, they say that's my emergency fund.

[A]

Shut up. That's not an emergency fund. Okay. $330,000 in this. This is great. Wow. It was 354,000. That's fantastic.

[B]

What's that?

[A]

Jeez.

[B]

I don't know what that one is.

[A]

Roth. All right.

[B]

I don't know what that one is.

[A]

Freedom's funning account. You have, you have freedom and you blew it.

[B]

That's my bills.

[A]

I don't give a. I don't give a.

[B]

No, no.

[A]

All right. Income that comes in for now. And yes, I really. You need to grind on the nurse life once you get it. But okay. Your debt payments, not mortgage. Let's find out. Debt, minimum payments without your mortgage comes out to $1,593.55. Okay. She's surprised. I don't know how. Her mortgage is $2,040.24. Utilities, Internet, all that stuff combined.

[B]

Water is 115, utilities are 165. Or electricity is 165. Internet and phones, they're together. Is 206.

[A]

Hey, it's aggressive, okay?

[B]

I have my kids. Lions on there.

[A]

$486. If T Mobile is getting in your area, I would do helium. It's cheap if you own your phones. Right out. Okay. Gas. Vroom, vroom. Drive, drive.

[B]

$40 a month.

[A]

What? Yeah. Okay. Car insurance.

[B]

600 every six months.

[A]

Oh, okay. 100 bucks. Great. No. Yeah. Complicated math. Okay, you get them five days a week.

[B]

Who? My kids.

[A]

What's the.

[B]

He gets them every other weekend.

[A]

Okay. Okay, so I'm gonna say you could. Thousand bucks. Thousand bucks for groceries because you're not going out to eat anymore. Congratulations. Welcome, welcome. Not going out to eat. Tv.

[B]

Fun.

[A]

Anything else you need to survive? This also goes to kids. Okay. Your portion of the daycare, blah, blah, blah, childcare, whatever. How much is that on a monthly basis?

[B]

It's.

[A]

Come on.

[B]

Freaking tricky. I don't know. Let me think. Hold on.

[A]

What's the total?

[B]

50. 50. 50, 50. 200 and then 70 or 30% of 200 for right now.

[A]

That's it.

[B]

A week.

[A]

Oh, okay. 200 and then 30 of that times up by 52. Divide that by 12. Okay. 260 for child care, then TP fund. Anything else you need you to survive, including for the kids. Should be able to put you at $400 a month. Now I think we can go down to $300. They could be more expensive come beginning of school time. Obviously, but we budget those in medical, health care, co pays. Anything.

[B]

That's just about to hit. Yes.

[A]

What's just about to hit?

[B]

Copays are gonna be about. I don't know, I'd say 70amonth.

[A]

Okay, 70amonth. Do you have any pets?

[B]

Yes, I have a dog and a fish.

[A]

K fish. No. And the dog, age and health.

[B]

She's one and a half. Good. She's not neutered. I just got a quote for it.

[A]

Okay, we're gonna do $40 a month in pet insurance, dog food, fish food, combined. How much?

[B]

God, I don't even.

[A]

Come on.

[B]

$10 a month. She gets like a five pound bag of Purina and then it lasts for months.

[A]

Great. Really taking care of her.

[B]

I. She's. She's amazing.

[A]

That. That has nothing to do with what kind of food you got her. That also has nothing to do with what kind of food you get her. I know. I'm so confused what you're talking about. 4:86 for the Internet or 4:80 Internet and phones. 260 with your utilities. Let's say 40. Sorry. It was combined necessary to survive. $5,933.79. Of course we know that makes us underwater decently.

[B]

Not as much as I thought, well.

[A]

This is because you've never budgeted and you've never cut back. And you live life like you make so much more money because you spend $10,500 a month. Because you're a complete financial joke. Joke. Yes. And you're essentially an EPO baby. And not even just a trust fund baby. And it's a sad excuse of an existence with what you're doing for it.

[B]

I would trade all of it for my parents. I will tell you that. I just wanted to say.

[A]

Yeah, most would. That means congratulations. Oh, sympathy. Sympathy. Sad. Okay. Yes, we all would. Come on. I'd give anything for my parents to survive.

[B]

That is not like a Menendez brother or something.

[A]

Fair enough. Fair enough. Though they're up for parole. I heard that if you budget this, at least break even. At least maintain your nest egg. You can pull, if you got basically a million bucks. What I will allow. Gotta. You can pull 40,000 hours a year, but that's it. That's so that it maintains.

[B]

So what would I do? I would just pay all of my debt off right now.

[A]

Oh, yeah, that's probably.

[B]

And then live off.

[A]

Maybe not all the. No, no. Not the house. Not the high interest. Not the low interest, Salima. But the high interest. Sally May. The blue cash and the capital one. Yes, I'd pay it off. I'd close them. You don't need credit, so it doesn't matter. Yes, do that. And then take 4% a year out of your portfolio indefinitely. Other than that, you earn what you want to spend. That's it.

[B]

Okay.

[A]

That's it, dude. Join us in the post show. There's extra things we're gonna get to talk about. There always are. And I don't know about them, but the producers are coming in. It's gonna get crazy. We're gonna do the financial auto post. Financial score. Hammer Financial Score. And then we'll get into the post show. But spending within a budget. You ever spent 0 out of 10 debt collection, 0 out of 10 emergency fund. There is no emergency fund. 0 out of 10 retirement, 10 out of 10 real estate rate. It's not perfect. It's a little down value, but you do have an equity position. Great rate. I'll say a 7 out of 10. You do not have an emergency fund. It is not properly invested. It's. Nope. That is not an emergency fund. Shut the up. We're putting that towards the retirement because that's what it's invested as. That is a hammer financial score. 3.5 out of 10. Join Hammer Elite right now and submit proof of purchase@hammer elite.com and I will cover the cost by sending you a digital gift card that can be spent anywhere in most countries. Join us for the potion show. I want to call this guy.

[B]

The whole purpose of coming here.

[A]

Get his on the phone right now. This is even better cuz he has no idea who Caleb is. Hi, can you hear me? Is she there? She is. Say hi.

[B]

They think you are smart to leave me.

[A]

Is this being recorded right now?

[B]

You okay with that?

[A]

I'm not doing this. Exclusive Members Content Click the link in the description or pin comment below and watch thousands of hours of extra and uncensored content.