Financial Audit

Episode: "These Illegal Immigrants Are F*cked"

Host: Caleb Hammer
Guests: Natasha (35, "mentally 29" – stay-at-home mom), Oscar (32, carpenter)
Date: October 26, 2025

Episode Overview

This episode of Financial Audit dives into the chaotic finances—and personal dynamics—of Natasha and Oscar, an undocumented couple from Phoenix, Arizona. With three kids, over $130,000 in consumer debt (not including their mortgage), a tumultuous employment history, and cultural/relationship challenges, Caleb attempts to untangle their money mess—and their communication breakdown. The discussion is raw, confrontational, and laced with Caleb’s signature blunt (sometimes abrasive) humor.

Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Background & Dynamic

• Immigration Status: Both Natasha and Oscar are Dreamers—they came from Mexico City as children under DACA.
  • Natasha arrived at age 9; Oscar at age 5 ([74:11]).
• Family Setup:
  • Not married, but living as domestic partners.
  • Three children: 17, 12 (Natasha’s from previous marriage), and a 3-month-old baby together ([05:01]).
  • Natasha is a stay-at-home mom, recently fired while 8 months pregnant ([14:10]).
  • Oscar works 50–60 hours/week as a union carpenter ([08:36]).

2. Income & Tax Issues

• Oscar earns $31/hr, but pay varies with extra hours and union deductions ([08:29]).
• Household is essentially single-income since Natasha lost her job, increasing financial strain.
• They operate mostly tax-exempt currently, which may result in a tax bill ([10:12]).
  • Anticipate owing ~$3,000 in federal taxes despite deductions ([18:10]).

3. Budgeting Conflict

• Philosophical Clash: Natasha prefers "weekly" emotional budgeting, believing it’s a “girl” thing, and claims her friends do it too ([21:24], [21:39]). Oscar, and Caleb, argue for monthly, categorical, "math brain" budgeting.
  • Natasha: "When I was living by myself ... I was able to pay all my bills ..."
  • Caleb: "You had no debt ... Clearly it didn’t work if you had debt." ([20:05])
• Communication Breakdown: Oscar manages finances but finds Natasha disconnected and unwilling to use his budgeting app or track categories ([15:27]).
  • Oscar: “I feel like it’s maybe one of the things that’s holding me back from marriage … we don’t necessarily agree on finances.” ([16:02])
• Natasha admits she “just wants to know what needs to go out each week,” finding categorizing “tedious” ([17:05]).
• Caleb challenges the “girl brain vs boy brain” logic, lambasting both their approaches and lack of financial discipline ([25:21], [27:09]).

4. Spending & Debt Patterns

• Household brings in $5,800–6,200/month but recently spent $8,000 in one month (“tight budget”: [14:18]).
• Massive consumer debt: Over $130,000 not counting their mortgage.
  • 10+ credit cards, several in late fees or collections ([37:57], [38:11]).
  • Multiple balance transfers done, but never actually reducing principal ([75:00]).
  • Home equity loan used to consolidate debt, but immediately reaccumulated more ([93:09]).
  • Example purchases: $4,500 on Shakira concert tickets (Natasha lied to Oscar about the price – told him $2,000; actual was over $4,500 for three tickets) ([61:37]); $7,700 Discover bill, $800 Deadpool/Wolverine costumes, and trips to Miami to see Lionel Messi—all on credit ([53:29], [80:54], [81:16]).
• Pattern of impulsive, non-essential spending and lack of an emergency fund—leads to further debt and balance transfers when actual emergencies hit ([51:59]).
• Both make purchases behind each other’s backs; Natasha took a secret loan ([98:45]), Oscar bought a TV without telling her—complete lack of trust and communication ([71:14]).

5. Relationship & Marriage

• Not married: Oscar cites lack of trust on finances as major reason ([09:14], [16:02]).
• Natasha wants to get married (“just go to court, sign papers”), but Oscar is reluctant, allegedly fearing she’ll want a big wedding (she says that's untrue) ([40:42]).
• Caleb: "If you're not willing to take literally the most basic sacrifice...there's nothing here. And you guys are done." ([97:01])
• Family finances run separately, only some debts and the mortgage are joint.

6. Work & Life Hardships

• Natasha repeatedly fired: 3 jobs in the last few years, including while pregnant; at least one possible FMLA violation but unsure if legally actionable ([14:10], [42:13]).
• Personal tragedies: Loss of mother and sister—tied to job performance issues ([42:13]).
• Both stress that they're “hard workers” but have clearly struggled to adapt and communicate, both professionally and as partners.

7. Debt Details & Assets

• Mortgage: $260,631; payment $1,850/month ([92:11]).
• Home equity loan: $52,281 ([93:52]), used and then racked up new credit card debt afterward.
• Solar panel loan: $33,000, 1.99% ([94:55]); company is entering bankruptcy, but they'll still owe the debt ([94:41]).
• Toyota 4Runner loan: $37,087, 7%, $674/mo ([95:03]). Caleb tells them to sell it immediately, buy a $10,000 “beater,” or he's "ending this episode" ([97:01]).
• Jetta (older car): paid off, worth $1,700 ([95:55]).
• Several credit cards in collections/late—Natasha can't even access her PayPal credit account anymore ([58:31]).

8. Cultural & Gender Commentary

• Recurrent riffing about “girl brain” vs “boy brain” budgeting, with Natasha claiming the weekly style is common among her girlfriends ([21:39]).
• Caleb often pivots to satire, denouncing “girl math” and defending his “math brain” logic ([27:09], [29:34]).
• Strong references to cultural norms (Mexican traditions, Quinceañera: $5–6K for the party ([89:26]); use of "padrinos" (sponsors) to help pay for weddings) ([41:09]).

Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• On Natasha's Age:

  • "Can we just pretend that I'm 29?" – Natasha ([03:17])
  • "No, because your compound growth in the overall marketplace... is all dependent on age." – Caleb ([04:02])

• On Budgeting:

  • "Her way of budgeting just doesn't make sense ... at the end of the week, she thinks it's 'free to spend.'" – Oscar ([16:27])
  • "Girl brain math. Erase this and do it for me." – Caleb ([29:36])
  • "Shut the up then. What are you talking about? Clearly it didn’t work if you had debt." – Caleb ([20:17])
  • "You guys are a mess. You're the collection of everything bad with consumerism." – Caleb ([95:26])

• On Overspending:

  • "I like to give gifts. So when… Christmas time, birthday..." – Oscar, explaining $7,700 Discover bill ([53:29])
  • "But it was to see Messi!" – Oscar, about Miami trip on credit ([54:06])
  • "Your parents prefer Messi over you." – Caleb (to their future baby) ([56:07])

• On Relationship Issues:

  • "He wants me to be financially responsible, but I’m not his wife so I don’t have to really listen." – Natasha ([40:14])
  • “If you’re not willing to take literally the most basic sacrifice in the one thing you have, there’s nothing here. And you guys are done.” – Caleb (re: selling the 4Runner) ([97:01])

• On Debt & Denial:

  • [After Natasha admits to lying about Shakira ticket price]:
    • "You seem like a fun person to go to the bar with, but not someone I’d want to live the rest of my life with because you’re a liar and can’t communicate in any way whatsoever." – Caleb ([62:18])
    • "What the f*ck? That’s insane." – Oscar (finding out total ticket price) ([61:42])
  • Caleb: “You never pay off debt—you just consolidate, transfer…You can’t do another one of these tools, including bankruptcy, until you change your behavior.” ([93:17])

• On Family Enabling:

  • "Why are you helping [your sister with bankruptcy]? ...This wasn’t helping. I think this was enabling." – Caleb ([86:45])
  • "She has no responsibility in finances whatsoever. If I’m bad, she’s like, ten times worse." – Natasha ([86:52])

• On Immigration and Work Ethic:

  • "You’re the dude. Because we have a declining birth rate...If people are going to come here, I want you. This dude’s working 40, 50, 60 hours a week.” – Caleb ([75:16])
  • Both maintain DACA status and must avoid legal/tax violations to renew work permits ([76:11]).

• On Consequences and Final Warnings:

  • “I’m sad to see that. That is sad. If they’re not willing to take a single basic step, I’m done.” – Caleb ([97:01])

Important Timestamps

• 03:17 – Natasha admits to not being open about her real age.
• 05:44 – Natasha explains her current status as recently-fired, stay-at-home mom.
• 14:10 – Story of being fired while pregnant, possibly for break/FMLA issues.
• 16:02 – Oscar admits budgeting disagreements hold him back from marriage.
• 21:24–21:39 – Natasha and friends' "weekly/girl budgeting" philosophy.
• 37:57 / 38:11 – Debt revealed: $130,000+ consumer, not counting house.
• 53:29 – Oscar details $7,787 credit card balance origins.
• 61:37–62:03 – The Shakira concert blowup: Natasha's hidden $4,500 spend.
• 74:11 – Immigration status history.
• 93:09 – Home equity consolidation and rebounding debt.
• 95:26–97:01 – Caleb's ultimatum: sell the 4Runner or the episode ends.
• 98:45–98:53 – Natasha’s secret loan behind Oscar’s back.

Tone & Delivery

• Caleb is candid, brash, and sarcastic—often ribbing both guests for their rationalizations, math, and lack of discipline.
  • Provides technical explanations, but frequently diverts into satirical or exaggerated cultural commentary.
• The guests (Natasha & Oscar) vacillate between defensiveness, humor, exasperation, and moments of real vulnerability (especially about employment struggles and family loss).
• The overall dynamic is confrontational but oddly light, despite serious financial distress.

Summary Table: Financial Situation (approx.)

| Debt Type | Who | Amount | Notes | |------------------------------|-----|--------------|----------------------------| | Consumer Credit Cards | Both| $130,000+ | Revolving, frequent lates | | Mortgage | Joint| $260,631 | $1,850/mo | | Home Equity Loan | Joint| $52,281 | Used, then re-racked debt | | Solar Panels | Joint| $33,000 | 2% int, company bankrupt | | Toyota 4Runner Car Loan | Joint| $37,087 | 7%, $674/mo, equity pos | | Jetta (beater car) | Joint| Paid off | Worth ~$1,700 |

Conclusion: Caleb's Financial Audit Verdict

• The biggest issues: lack of aligned budgeting, impulse spending, hidden debts/purchases, and refusal to make basic sacrifices.
• The relationship is marred by denial, secrecy, and emotional decision-making about money; no hope of financial progress unless both face reality, communicate, and make drastic changes.
• Caleb gives the harsh assessment: Without basic discipline and willingness to sacrifice (e.g., selling the expensive 4Runner for a “beater”), this couple has “no path—nothing here.”
• The episode ends with Caleb’s ultimatum and a call for both the guests and audience to seriously reconsider their financial habits and partnership dynamics.

For listeners:

If you or your household see any of your own habits in Natasha and Oscar, consider this a warning: only brutal honesty, strong communication, and a willingness to track (and cut!) your spending will save you from a financial disaster like this.

Notable Quotes Recap (with Timestamps):

• "Can we just pretend that I'm 29?" – Natasha ([03:17])
• "You never pay off debt—you just consolidate, transfer…You can’t do another one of these tools, including bankruptcy, until you change your behavior." – Caleb ([93:17])
• "If you’re not willing to take literally the most basic sacrifice in the one thing you have, there’s nothing here. And you guys are done." – Caleb ([97:01])
• "You seem like a fun person to go to the bar with, but not a fun person to live the rest of life with because you’re a liar and can’t communicate in any way whatsoever." – Caleb ([62:18])
• "What the fck? That’s insane.*" – Oscar (on Shakira tickets) ([61:42])

[End of Summary]