Loading summary
Transcript235 lines
- [00:00]
A
Hey, guys. This is Molly Sims, host of Lipstick on the Rim. So I have a little bit of a pet peeve that I think you're going to relate to this. I'll be having a great day, feeling good, and someone will say to me, you look tired. And I'm like, I promise you I'm not really tired. But here's what I've learned. My eyelids, they do sit a little low. And once my doctor explained that to me, it actually kind of made a lot of sense. She prescribed me upneek, the first and only FDA approved prescription eye drop for adults with low lying eyelids. One drop per eye. In the morning, and I notice my eyes look more open, awake within minutes. It's like just one simple step. That's it. And the results, Guess what? They last up to eight hours. Learn more about upneek.com that's u p n e e q.com or talk to your doctor. Just a little quick safety note about Upneek. Oxymetazoline hydrochloride ophthalmic solution, 0.1%. Tell your doctor your symptoms and medical history, including blood pressure, blood flow issues, and heart, brain or eye disease. Drooping eyelids can be caused by other more serious conditions, such as a stroke. Do not touch the tip of the Upne vial to your eye or any other surface. This is not a complete list of risks.
- [01:12]
B
Good sleep is everything. That's why Ollie's science bag support is made with a blend of melatonin and L theanine for both kiddos and grownups. So when your mind won't switch off, you've got something that can help your racing thoughts and restless nights won't stand a chance. Find Ollie Sleep solutions for the whole family@ollie.com that's o l l y dot com. But if you are going to bring in Elton John.
- [01:40]
C
Have you seen that?
- [01:42]
B
Yeah, I'm not going to, you know, take a commission on him, but I am going to take a commission on that little piano getting in because that's a lot of time and effort and, you know, not easy.
- [01:55]
C
This is Financial Tea. What's up, sippers? Welcome back to Financial Tea, the podcast where I teach you how to build wealth with a side of market drama, money, scandals, and of course, financial pop culture. Today, you are in for a treat. I have Steph Cove here. She is an elite wedding planner to the uber rich. She's a dear friend of mine and we are so lucky to have her on the Financial Tea podcast right as we are starting wedding season to give us the tea on wedding finances of the super rich and also just of normal people. So, Steph, welcome to the financial tea.
- [02:35]
B
Thank you. I'm so happy to be here.
- [02:36]
C
We're gonna have the best time. But first, let's get into the MDJ market report. Okay. What's up, sippers? Welcome back to the MDJ market report. This is a Taylor Swift wedding themed edition. I've got three spicy hot stories just for you. The first is about prediction markets because $2 million has been wagered so far just on Taylor Swift's wedding on cowsheet. People are putting so much money trying to predict what is going to happen this weekend. My prediction is that they are going to do a smaller ceremony, like a really intimate ceremony, maybe the night before, and then they're gonna have a huge party with so many people, and that's gonna be like, a full concert and crazy. There's also all these predictions about, like, who's gonna be her bridesmaids. There's like 92% on the redhead named Abigail being her bridesmaid, which is like, duh, that's the easiest wager I've ever made. And then there's all these bets about if Blake Lively will be there. Like, 75% of people think that she won't be there. I think she definitely will be there because I don't think that Taylor would have written a song, like, with the lyrics being, like, good things. I like my friends canceled if she was very serious about actually never being friends with Blake Lively again. But as you can see from, like, me just having fun talking about this, like, it is really fun to predict things. And now that we have these prediction markets, you can actually put money behind the bets, which is very dangerous and obviously not something, as a financial expert that I condone, like, do not use prediction markets. But I will say, like, I understand why the Taylor Swift wedding prediction market is popping off so much, though, because she has basically trained us to be predictors as swifties for her whole career. Like, her whole career is based off of Easter eggs and what color is her nail polish? And did she change that lyric on purpose? And she's had us read into her career moves and her life this entire time. And so it's just crazy now that you can, like, actually put money behind it. But also, you guys are too smart for that. And I will just say, like, all of the data shows that you will lose money if you do the prediction apps. They're definitely evil and not something that you want to be using. But also, it is Fun to make predictions about the wedding, and I hope the mind come true. Okay, our next story is about Taylor Swift's prenup, which is obviously ironclad. From what I've read, nothing official has been released. Her dad orchestrated the whole thing. And the terms and conditions are basically like, she keeps everything, everything is really separate. All of the assets are separate, her name, her business, everything she's built. What I like the most about this is that it sounds like Travis just signed it without really, like, no questions asked. And I just love the idea that, like a prenup is normalized and also that we have so many women getting married right now who are richer than the man. We've got Taylor Swift walking down the aisle. We've got Du Lipa. Like, these are rich, self made women. And I love that they are in these amazing relationships, but also are smart enough financially to know that you have to protect yourself and you have to protect what you built. And that goes for even people who don't have $2 billion. You should also get a prenup. And the reason that I say this is, yes, you want to protect your 401k and anything that you're going in with, but also because it is a moment for you to be super transparent about your finances before you walk down the aisle, which you guys, you would be shocked at how few people do. So, yeah, I just think with prenups, it's like what you've built is worth protecting at every level. Which brings me to my third and most important story today. And it has a little bit of advice for Taylor, but also for you and for me, which is do not change your last name if you get married. And this really applies to, like, every woman listening to this podcast right now. This is very serious. There is a spill in Washington right now called the SAVE act. And on paper, it sounds really simple. Like it just requires proof of citizenship to register to vote. But the fine print around it is a bureaucratic nightmare that is basically designed to squeeze women because under this act, a standard driver's license or real ID will not cut it. In most states, if you want to vote, you would have to prove your citizenship in person using a passport or a birth certificate. An estimated 69 million American women have a birth certificate that doesn't match their current legal name because they took their husband's name. So, like, if your birth certificate says one name and your ID says another, a driver's license isn't going to cut it. You're going to have to track down your marriage Licenses, you're gonna have to pay legal fees. You're gonna have to jump through all of these bureaucratic hoops just to keep your ability to vote, which is so scary. So this is a huge tax on getting married, and it is being paid almost entirely by women. And it is a really good reason to not change your last name. I feel like I'm in Handmaid's Tale as I talk about this, but I just, like, want you to know because it's scary. What's also crazy is that Trump just canceled a signing cere for this bipartisan housing Affordability act, which, like, would have been amazing because obviously, as Gen Z millennials, we can't afford houses. This would have helped with that, but he's holding that bill hostage until Senate passes the SAVE Act. We're basically getting hit twice. Like, this housing bill that would have made it way cheaper for us to own single family homes is staying blocked until the voter bill passes to unlock it. So our rights have never felt more perilous. And I know that having money won't fix this, like, very broken political system, but I will say that financial power does give you autonomy when the rules try to squeeze you out. So please, protect your name, protect your assets. These are your ultimate leverage. Don't ever give them up. Love is amazing. It's so great to make a family with someone and build a life, but we also have to be smart about that and protect ourselves. Let's get into our amazing conversation with Steph Cove, the richest wedding planner of all time. Like, this woman really is operating on another planet. She is so talented. She does the most incredible weddings and she gave us a lot of tea on the industry and how to just rock it this wedding season. So let's jump in. I like to always start the show with some rapid fire questions. So first of all, what gives you the financial ick? And these can be wedding flavored. So what gives you the wedding financial ick?
- [09:24]
B
When I walk into a wedding that just looks like overspent money. I saw one yesterday on Instagram.
- [09:32]
C
Well, my parents were at it and it was like there was no taste, but there was so much money.
- [09:37]
B
Just stuff everywhere.
- [09:39]
C
Yeah. Like so. And too many flowers, like there. The limit does exist.
- [09:43]
B
Yeah, that gives me the ick.
- [09:45]
C
What do you think are the best and worst purchase that people can make on a wedding?
- [09:49]
B
I think entertainment is one of the best.
- [09:52]
C
Oh, really? Like a great band? Yes.
- [09:54]
B
I think music is so important to a wedding and I think, you know, overdoing it with, like, the activities or too much like cheesy custom stuff.
- [10:06]
C
Yeah.
- [10:07]
B
Is the worst.
- [10:08]
C
Yeah. When I was going to bat mitzvahs, there were so many activities.
- [10:11]
B
We don't need a shirt screaming like, yeah, station. Or hats, you know, being embroidered.
- [10:17]
C
We don't need hats being embroidered. No, we're adults.
- [10:19]
B
Yes.
- [10:20]
C
So just to orient our listeners, can you tell us a little bit about your business? The kind of weddings that you do, like, what's the range of budget for the kind of weddings that you plan?
- [10:30]
B
So we do high end full planning, full design, full production. So we literally do every little thing that our clients need in regards to range. You know, it really depends what they're wanting to do. I haven't seen a wedding under a million dollars in, in a long while, but we're also doing a lot of build outs and making tents in the middle of fields and flooring in, you know, next to the ocean and things like that. So we're not just talking ballrooms.
- [11:05]
C
What's the most that anyone's ever spent on a wedding with you?
- [11:08]
B
I'm not going to answer that, but I will say 10 plus.
- [11:11]
C
And how did you allocate that budget?
- [11:13]
B
You know, it's less about it, feeling over the top. And when, you know, we do those kind of weddings, it's not that anyone would even notice that. It's more about the experience and making sure there's what those guests need. If, you know, if you're not in a structure, you need bathrooms, you need floorings, you need power, you need, you know, restrooms everywhere. So weddings can add up in different ways. I think, you know, what matters to me is less how much money they're spending, but more that what we're spending is on things like the experience and like making it tasteful and understated and not feeling like a production. Even though obviously to do these things, it is a production.
- [11:55]
C
I've seen you on action. Like you have a little headset, like you've got like boots on the ground, like you know what's happening. But it's like you make it feel
- [12:03]
B
very effortless, which is exactly what I want.
- [12:06]
C
Yeah, so your whole thing is like tasteful, elegant. So you're planning all these weddings, they're a big budget. How much of that budget do you profit?
- [12:16]
B
So we charge a fee. It's 20% of the overall budget, which is pretty standard, I think, these days at this level.
- [12:24]
C
And like, is it increasing every year?
- [12:26]
B
It is not increasing every year because we only take on so much.
- [12:30]
C
How many weddings do you do per Year.
- [12:32]
B
It depends on where they are because each wedding comes with about three trips to wherever we're going.
- [12:39]
C
Wow. Do you get to put them on your credit card so you get the points?
- [12:42]
B
We do. You know, it depends on the clients. Sometimes they have a credit card for us. A lot of times we do it. It's just not as messy for them and saves them time.
- [12:52]
C
Do you get to fly first class?
- [12:54]
B
You know, in my contract I do, but that's it currently.
- [13:00]
C
So what are like the most popular destinations to get married?
- [13:04]
B
I always think Italy is popular. France is popular. We sometimes have a lot of Caribbean.
- [13:12]
C
Ooh, I love the Caribbean.
- [13:13]
B
Yeah, like Bahamas and Mexico. We've done a lot in, you know, hopefully we'll expand to some other countries. But we, we do work in Europe quite a bit.
- [13:26]
C
I love that. And so when you have a budget, like, you know, $2 million, what's the breakdown? Like, what are the different costs we're looking at? You're talking about all these build outs and things. So like, can you break down the pie? Like, what are the biggest costs?
- [13:41]
B
So let's say you're having a 200 person wedding.
- [13:44]
C
Is that normal?
- [13:46]
B
Yeah, I mean, our sweet spot. And like, I love when we get to do like a 50 person wedding, but most of the time we're doing like 200 to 350. So let's say we have a 200 person wedding, five star hotel. You're gonna spend at least 200k on food and beverage site rental fees. Okay, that's before doing anything.
- [14:11]
C
Yeah.
- [14:11]
B
Then you know, you're probably gonna spend about 100k on florals. If you're gonna do like the ceremony, the cocktails, the dinner for 200 people and all the other miscellaneous things. And flowers are expensive right now, and they have been since COVID Then you're going to spend at least 50,000 unlighting power generators. Even if you're at a venue, you sometimes have to add power. You're going to spend probably at least 40k on sound, at least 50k on your dinner van, 10k on, you know, strings and cocktail music.
- [14:49]
C
Strings.
- [14:49]
B
That'll get you the cello players, Max, Ira, paper items. This sounds crazy, but let's say you do save the dates, invitations, the day of paper, like the welcome notes, the maps, the escort card, you know, printed for all the people you're inviting, which is more than 200 guests. I mean, that might be $50,000.
- [15:12]
C
Yeah.
- [15:12]
B
Then you have photo, which great photographers can be anywhere between 35,000 and a hundred thousand.
- [15:19]
C
Whoa. Video. And no one ever watches their wedding video, by the way.
- [15:24]
B
Yeah, probably, like themselves, maybe once every few years. And there's some really great videos out there with, like, real film and stuff. But it's expensive, so I'd say anywhere from 25 to 50,000, let's say to be reasonable. Then you have rentals, because nobody wants the hotel. Plates, glassware, flatware, et cetera. So let's just say $75,000 for rentals. Then let's say welcome gifts, because everyone wants to give welcome gifts. Even if you don't go crazy and you do something super simple, it's still $10,000. Then you have fabrication. So you don't have to have crazy fabrication if you're doing it at a venue. But I'm pretty sure you're going to want, like, you know, a stage facade, some bars that are kind of special. So let's say 60,000 there, and then you're going to have a dance floor. 6,000 to 9,000, depending. I know that's free.
- [16:30]
C
Giving it away.
- [16:31]
B
And then add all that up, you're probably close to a million dollars. Then you have your planner.
- [16:36]
C
That's you.
- [16:37]
B
Then you have labor, which, for this, you know, if this was a local wedding at a venue, maybe 40,000. But some of these destinations are way more, but that's. That makes the whole difference. And then you have to have some money aside for gratuities.
- [16:53]
C
Yeah. How much are you supposed to tip?
- [16:55]
B
I usually do it based on the wedding and, like, what, you know, the client's most comfortable with. But let's say on this $1 million wedding, it's somewhere between 10 and 20 that you give out to people that really deserve it.
- [17:08]
C
Do you help your clients with the tips?
- [17:10]
B
Yeah.
- [17:10]
C
Cause that's a lot of effort. Like on the wedding day.
- [17:12]
B
Yeah. I mean, our clients shouldn't have to do anything but worry about getting dressed and, like, family stuff that I can't
- [17:19]
C
fix, which my sister was the whole thing, which I think you did try
- [17:24]
B
and fix sometimes, you know, sometimes it's fixable. But yeah, that it goes so fast. And, like, that's without even thinking about, okay, we need to put a floor in an uneven ground in a field, a tent. Then we need to make the tent look nice and, like, it's not a tent, because that's what most people ask for. And then all the things that go into that, you have to build a stage, you have to build bars, et cetera. So you can see why these weddings can become super pricey. I mean, Oh, I forgot to even put shuttles. Let's say one night of shuttles. $20,000, you know, if you have to get them to the venue. So it all adds up.
- [18:02]
C
And you are dealing with really rich people and they're taking their guests to destinations. Do you think that they should pay for the rooms?
- [18:08]
B
No, I think that everybody has a budget, no matter who they are. I think it's very generous on those occasions when they do that.
- [18:20]
C
What percent of people do you think do that? That's always a thing where people are like, if I'm going to the destination wedding, do I have to get them a gift? And, like, it's crazy that they're not paying for the rooms. I think it's okay that you're paying for the room.
- [18:30]
B
I do, too. I think that, you know, people put so much cost into these few days and give you a great experience, and no one's really paying for anything, that getting there and paying for the rooms is okay. Yeah, if the rooms were $10,000 a night.
- [18:48]
C
Have you seen that?
- [18:49]
B
No, but I don't.
- [18:50]
C
What's, like, the night, like, the most expensive hotel you've done?
- [18:53]
B
Well, I see a lot of hotel rooms in general, and I mean, it's crazy, right? Like, in Europe, the nice hotels, they're all 3,000 plus a night. Everything's so expensive, even in, you know, in California. But I think there's a certain point that you really have to think about your guests and, like, is this okay to ask or not?
- [19:12]
C
What are, like, the most common financial questions that you get? Because there's a whole decorum to throwing a party, throwing a wedding where you want to come off as generous, but it's all. You're also trying to figure out where the line is.
- [19:25]
B
Yeah. And we talk about this stuff a lot. I'm really big on talking about it in the beginning, which some people don't like because it's an uncomfortable conversation, but one. You know, I'm a. I'm definitely a woman of her word, and I don't want to go into something without giving you an idea of what it's going to cost, because then you're going to get a big bill later, and then we're not going to like each other. And I'm not down with that. Yeah.
- [19:48]
C
Did you know that three out of four US Homes have toxic chemicals in their tap water? Even though contaminated water looks clear, it could put you at risk for devastating health concerns. And surprisingly, standard fridge and pitcher filters do little to remove most contaminants. And bottled water contains microplastics. What's the solution? Well, it's Aquatru, the countertop water purifier. Tested and certified to remove 84 contaminants including chlorine, lead, forever, chemicals and and microplastics. Its patented four stage reverse osmosis system goes way beyond ordinary filters for pure healthy water. You can trust no plumbing, no installation. Aquatrue has been featured in Business Insider, Popular Science and was named best countertop water filter by good housekeeping. Join 98% of customers who say their drinking water is cleaner, safer and healthier. Go to aquatrue.com now for 20% off your purifier using promo code Financial Tea. Aqua True even comes with a 30 day best tasting water guarantee. That's aquatrue.com a q u a t r u.com promo code financial t f I N A N C I A L T E A okay, let's be real. The best summer pieces are the ones that you're ending up wearing on repeat. And that's why I love quints because they have those pieces but they also have really beautiful 14 karat gold jewelry that you can use to add this sort of subtle finishing touch. And the price is so good. Like everything at quints is literally priced 50 to 80% less than similar brands. They work directly with ethical factories and then are able to cut out the middleman. So you're really just paying for exceptional quality instead of brand markup. I just got their Bella stretch barrel jeans. They are so flattering. They look so expensive and they were only $50. So if you want to just like make your summer wardrobe feel eas, you don't want to spend a million dollars. You want really good quality. Go to quint.com financialtea you're going to get free shipping on your order. You're going to get 365 day returns. If you're in Canada, it's available there too. That's Q-U-I n c e.com financial t for free shipping and 365 day returns. Quint.comfinancialtea it's also crazy that like the bride's budget for clothing is not included in this because it's definitely always at least a million dollars. Crazy.
- [22:25]
B
Yeah, I mean I can't have it in my budget because it so much
- [22:29]
C
and like the bridal stylist and the hair and makeup like that I feel like doubles it to begin with because every dress, everything that you get for a wedding is like 3x the price. Like you're gonna buy a flower at the store. It's maybe the same flower they're gonna sell you for a wedding for, like, so much more. And even hair and makeup, it's the same hair and makeup. Because they're doing it on your wedding day. They're gonna make it, they're gonna mark it up. Like, why? What is that about? Like, the wedding industry is so crazy.
- [22:59]
B
It is really crazy. Yeah. And like the amount of clothing and purses and shoes and.
- [23:06]
C
And it's all one time use, which kills me too, where it's like, you are buying and people are so obsessed with like, I gotta keep the dress for, like my, you know, daughter. Da, da, da. And I'm like, is your daughter really. Your daughter's gonna want her own dress. What's the most expensive wedding dress that you've ever, like, had a bride wear?
- [23:23]
B
Well, when you get into, like, custom couture, it's in the hundreds of thousands.
- [23:29]
C
What?
- [23:30]
B
Yeah.
- [23:31]
C
Hundreds of thousands.
- [23:32]
B
Yeah, that's.
- [23:33]
C
Do you really look that much better?
- [23:35]
B
I think it depends how much fashion means to you. You know, it's yes. And like, you have to fly over to Paris a few times. It's not easy.
- [23:46]
C
Nothing good is.
- [23:47]
B
No, it's true. But yeah, the biggest thing with weddings is priorities. You have to get your priorities straight. And if your priority is fashion, like, put your money there.
- [23:57]
C
So something I think about a lot, I had someone write into My Dear Sugar Mama, which is my, like, advice column. And it was a girl who was marrying into a wealthy family, and the mother of the groom was paying for everything and was using money to control the wedding and like, control the venue, control the choices, whatever. And she felt really stuck. And so I'm wondering, have you ever had a family try to use money to control the wedding? That must happen a lot. I'm paying for this. I can decide.
- [24:26]
B
Yeah, I've definitely seen that in my career. And you know, luckily now being a little older, like, I feel like that's something that I would step in on.
- [24:39]
C
Oh, I love that.
- [24:40]
B
And help with. And I. Luckily, you know, my clients are great and I. I don't see that very much, but I. I have.
- [24:47]
C
Give us some examples.
- [24:49]
B
You know, I think that it's hard for someone who's marrying into a family and they're paying for everything to demand things. It's a really hard place to be in. I think what's really nice is if you're able to get everyone to agree to let the couple be kind of like the people talking to Me. And then when there's like decisions and we really love this, we really love that, then they can go to the committee.
- [25:13]
C
Yeah.
- [25:13]
B
To get their answers. But it's all, you know, it represents them, not somebody else. And I feel like that's a really great way that I've worked with couples and their families to represent them.
- [25:24]
C
So you have to do like a lot of financial counseling.
- [25:27]
B
Yeah, I would call it probably therapy.
- [25:29]
C
Yeah, it sounds like it. Like you're in a really complicated place.
- [25:32]
B
Yeah, it is an interesting place because you're constantly kind of trying to keep everyone really happy. This is supposed to be really fun and not stressful. And I really don't believe in stressful wedding planning. So I think just having a relationship with all parties and like getting everyone excited about the same things really helps.
- [25:53]
C
So give us a little bit about your background, like how did you build this business and like how did you build up to this high clientele? Because it makes a lot of sense for you from as a business perspective to just do more expensive weddings because you're getting a piece of something that's a bigger pie.
- [26:10]
B
But I started in, I grew up in Palm Beach, Florida and I worked with Breakers. Fabulous. In high school. I then went to hospitality school, but I minored in psychology, which was probably the most useful in what I do. And then, you know, after college I went into restaurants, I did catering, I did events. I actually helped manage a restaurant at 23 because it just had to happen and I worked my butt off. But I also learned like a lot about respect from everyone was older than me. And then from there I decided I wanted to go back towards events. And I worked at the Little Nell in Aspen, did a lot of events. I eventually moved to la. I worked with another event planner for about eight years. We did a lot of celebrity and bigger weddings. And then eventually I went out on my own and I just sort of developed my own group of clients, many of which, you know, we're on the east coast for whatever reason and from there it's just, you know, kind of everyone's known, knows each other and it's just been great because I feel like all of our clients know each other. They can get references on us from each other, we've met at weddings, we obviously still have clients in la. And then we have miscellaneous clients that call from all over the world.
- [27:49]
C
Who do you think are the hardest clients though? Like self made people, old money people, celebrities, athletes, influencers.
- [27:59]
B
I'll have to say. I mean, I, I feel like you'll find this interesting when I, you know, started my own business, and a lot of the people calling me were Wall street finance. And imagine having to explain to dads,
- [28:17]
C
there's a lot of Wall street fathers in your.
- [28:19]
B
In your world, why me charging 20% was fair and why it just didn't mean I would pick everything most expensive so I would make more money.
- [28:30]
C
Oh, yeah. How do you respond to that?
- [28:32]
B
I used to be so nervous, but the truth is, it's not about, like, that's why we have a budget we're working from. Because I'm not gonna wanna go over it. I wanna, like, maintain the budget. It's for the amount of time and hours we put into this, which, if you divided, would be nothing, you know, with the amount of hours. And, like, that's what I would have to tell them over and over again. Because I'm not gonna pick the more expensive florist. Because then I'm probably not gonna make the budget that I'm trying to keep you on. But if you are gonna bring in Elton John.
- [29:07]
C
Have you seen that?
- [29:09]
B
Yeah. I'm not going to, you know, take a commission on him, but I am gonna take a commission on that little piano getting in, because that's a lot of time and effort and, you know, not easy. So that was a really difficult part just of building this career is I had to explain that over and over to people who were not down with the fee structure. And now I feel really proud that I can explain it without being nervous. But also, I think it is fair. I think it is the most transparent. And, you know, I also don't want to feel bad about the amount of work we're putting in. I want everyone to feel good. And I. I will say that to people now when they question the percentage.
- [29:53]
C
Do you say no to a lot of people?
- [29:56]
B
Sometimes I know when it's the wrong client for me, and I will say that.
- [30:02]
C
Wow. T. Yeah. What makes someone the wrong client?
- [30:05]
B
Well, kind of like we talked about in the beginning, like, if you want to have all that poor dripping or floor, like, you spent a lot of money.
- [30:15]
C
There are wedding planners for that. Yeah.
- [30:17]
B
That's just a different vibe. And that's just not interesting to me to create. Like, I want it to be something they're super proud of, and people are like, wow, this is just beautiful.
- [30:29]
C
You're talking a lot about how involved that you get in people's, like, personal and familial lives doing this work. So how much of this job is being a therapist and, like, what Are some of the common issues that you really see coming coming up?
- [30:41]
B
I would say 70 is wow. And I don't even know that it's just about problems. I mean you're so close for a year or more sometimes with someone who you're really trusting a lot with. So you, you know, you. I'm never going to talk about people's finances. I'm not going to talk about their personal issues. You know, they feel comfortable. You know, I've been asked, I've been asked to help with a prenup. I've been asked to after a wedding, help with a surrogate. Obviously I'm not qualified for that.
- [31:18]
C
That you knew who how to get one.
- [31:21]
B
Yeah.
- [31:21]
C
But I basically look at you as like a life concierge. They're like, what can't she play on the wedding? Let's like she'll do the prenup, she'll do the surrogate. It's really got them into preschool.
- [31:30]
B
It's really funny. And once I had a client, that's
- [31:33]
C
how you expand the business, right?
- [31:34]
B
I know. Once I had a client say your, your job is very interesting. It's like you have to know everything and every answer to every question about things that don't even have to do with your like with a wedding. And I'm like, I know like because people text and be like, where is the best place in, you know, Milan to have dinner tonight? You know, so it's an interesting thing because for a year you really can.
- [32:01]
C
You're the go to.
- [32:02]
B
Yeah.
- [32:04]
C
Starting something new isn't just hard, it is terrifying. Trust me, I know when I started my business I was not sure what I was doing and now I know that it was right to believe in myself despite like all of those fears and hesitations. But I have to say it also helps when you have a partner like Shopify on your side to help so accelerate your efficiency. Whether you are uploading new products or trying to improve, improve existing ones, Shopify is packed with helpful AI tools that write product descriptions, page headlines and even enhance your product photography. So get the word out like you have a marketing team behind you. Easily create email and social media campaigns wherever your customers are scrolling or strolling. And best yet, Shopify is your commerce expert. With world class expertise in everything from managing inventory to international shipping to processing returns and beyond. It's time to turn those what ifs into with Shopify today. Sign up for your $1 per month trial today at shopify.com financialtea. Go to shopify.com financialtea that's shopify.com financialtea this episode is brought to you by Google Chrome. You think you know a browser, but
- [33:20]
B
Gemini and Chrome, that's new. It can help you with practically anything
- [33:24]
C
on the web, like restoring a vintage motorcycle from a 50 page restoration block. Or finally break down that long article you've had open for weeks. Gemini and Chrome is here for it, ready to make anything online make sense. There's no place like Chrome. Check responses set up required compatibility and availability various 18 plus. You're talking a lot about how close you are with these clients. And I told a few of your clients that you're coming here today and you know, it was just a resounding oh my God, I love. I can't believe you get to sit down with her. They're so excited. But it is hard because you are like so close to the couple and then it's done, the wedding's over. So how do you cut off or like less in contact post wedding? Like, I feel like that must be a pretty intense cliff for some people. Like have you had to set boundaries?
- [34:10]
B
I know that's the hardest part is it's like over all of a sudden. And you know, I still have to talk to them about photos, video, some leftover things. But you go from speaking all the time to like, you know, once every couple weeks on text. And for a long time I tried really hard. Every time I went to New York, I had to see every client, you know, drinks with so and so, breakfast with so and so, coffee.
- [34:37]
C
Yeah.
- [34:38]
B
And it's exhausting.
- [34:39]
C
Yeah.
- [34:40]
B
So I'm not as good at it anymore. And obviously there's been more clients. But I still try really hard to see people when I go back. I've never had to make boundaries with a client, but many of them, many of them have said I should start a business about like post wedding depression. With your planner.
- [34:58]
C
Okay, so now let's talk about the wedding industry. Because it is worth $1.3 trillion, it has obviously blown up and I think social media has a lot to do with that. And so how do you think expectations have changed when people are seeing these multimillion dollar weddings sort of normalized online? Like honestly, like the ones that you play on stuff, like you are part of the problem. So you're setting the bar high for the rest of us because we're seeing your gorgeous moments and obviously you're not doing it for social media. But it's like, it is crazy. People go into debt for weddings or going to debt for bachelorettes. It's like all this Keeping up with the Joneses bullshit.
- [35:34]
B
Yeah. I often wonder how people are going on all these bachelorette trips, destination weddings, gifts. It's a lot for young people in their channel. It's huge investment. And I do think it's great when people think about it or try to combine weekends like a shower and a bachelorette. I definitely think social media has changed everything in the wedding business, whether that's for the better or worse because you
- [36:01]
C
started sort of before social media. So, like, what are some of the differences that you can speak to now? Well, do you think the brides want more outfits?
- [36:09]
B
Yeah, for sure.
- [36:10]
C
Yeah.
- [36:11]
B
The brides want more outfits. Just in the beginning of social media, I just remember we were so appalled because all these tables that were being shown, everything was fake. You know, people were setting up things to look like a wedding, but it was really just a table. And the things they were doing weren't possible in reality. But I do, I think it shows people all these things and then they want to have that many dress changes and they want to have. I just remember that wedding in Paris, that over the top camera was like all over the place because they had like a social media person.
- [36:47]
C
Oh, the woman, the girl from Texas.
- [36:49]
B
Yeah.
- [36:50]
C
Who was like, it was a $59 million Paris wedding. And then the groom got a life in jail.
- [36:57]
B
Yeah.
- [36:58]
C
Because he assaulted police officers. That is so crazy. He was given probation, of course. But I mean, 59 million. I don't know what they spent on. Yeah.
- [37:09]
B
I. I never know what to think when people say that there was a 59 million wedding or so and so got married and it was 30 million. I mean, that's a lot of money to spend. It's like, what on. And so I.
- [37:21]
C
They must have paid for all the rooms, maybe all the flights, maybe even private planes.
- [37:26]
B
There would definitely have to be private planes.
- [37:28]
C
You're obviously. It's hard to get on your roster. You need a lot of money to get in you. It's exclusive. You don't take everyone. And I'm sure I have a lot of people listening who are getting married and want to have a special wedding with, you know, Steph Cove like touches. So is there any silver bullet advice that you could give to our brides and grooms who might be getting married? Like best practices day of how to. Are there any good, like budget hacks that you have for weddings?
- [37:55]
B
Use your miles, you know, use it for site visits, for flights, use it for hotels. Like, do that as much as you can. I would. I get so many calls where they're like, I want to be outside, I want to have a tent. That is going to cost you a lot more money. Look at other venues. You're going to have more of what you want if you look at the other venues because then you can do some of the other touches.
- [38:22]
C
Oh, cool. So yeah, like Joe, tent is always expensive. So like take a loss somewhere so that you can win other places. Yeah, you can have everything, but you can have something.
- [38:32]
B
Yes, exactly. Same thing is like, you know, a band is really great, but if you're not a huge band person, hire a really great DJ and use that money somewhere else. If you are a huge entertainment person, hire a really great band.
- [38:46]
C
It don't skip on band.
- [38:47]
B
There's nothing skimp, you know, I think again, sit down with your fiance and do priorities. What matters to you? Like to me it's entertainment, guest experience and flow for my own wedding. And to someone else it might be what everything looks like. And also food and beverage was one of mine. And food and beverage you don't care about. Or paper items you don't care about. If you don't care about paper items, you know, do electronic save the date and invitation and spend more on what you do care about.
- [39:18]
C
I don't understand the paper items. Like I got a wedding invite and immediately in the trash. Yeah, I'm enjoying it for one second. But I'm like, you're saying people are spending 50 grand on these invitations. Like, send me a party full.
- [39:32]
B
Right.
- [39:32]
C
Like it'll go right in my ical. I'll know. I'm going. You can have a cute website. But it's like to me that should be the first to go.
- [39:38]
B
Yeah. And a lot of people choose that. I mean, to me it's being old school. I love the paper, the texture, the process.
- [39:44]
C
Of course that's a thing. But I'm like the actual. I don't. I'm supposed to save every invite.
- [39:50]
B
No, you can't.
- [39:51]
C
What are other budget hacks?
- [39:52]
B
Other budget hacks?
- [39:54]
C
Can we rent our outfits?
- [39:55]
B
Yes.
- [39:56]
C
Okay.
- [39:56]
B
Outfits is a huge one. Rent your outfits. You know, get things at like old vintage stores. People spend so much money on clothes.
- [40:09]
C
It's so stupid.
- [40:10]
B
It's a. It's just so much. And. And then, you know, do something with it afterwards. You probably aren't going to wear it again.
- [40:18]
C
Yeah. Diet and wear it to something else or like sell it or rent it or donate it or donate it to
- [40:24]
B
someone that really needs it.
- [40:25]
C
Yeah, that's cool. I love that. Me Too What I would like hair and makeup and all that, because it gets so expensive.
- [40:30]
B
It does get expensive, I think. You know, I. I have gone to clients that have gotten less expensive, hair and makeup stylists. And I've noticed they really do care about how they're going to look that day. And I've said, I really think this is. Is somewhere you should invest. Whereas there's other people that don't care are super, like, laid back. And that's where I feel like they should save there. I think it depends on the person because that is meltdown territory.
- [41:01]
C
Yeah, I would melt down.
- [41:02]
B
Yeah. If you don't look how you want to look on your wedding day, that is like, a very hard thing to make right at that moment before you walk down the aisle. And the last thing you want is someone crying because they feel like they're not looking how they want to on their way.
- [41:15]
C
Oh, that would be shitty.
- [41:17]
B
So I think it's good to invest there.
- [41:20]
C
Okay. Any other tips?
- [41:23]
B
Let's see, what else?
- [41:24]
C
Like, what areas do you think it's fine for budget for couples to cut back on?
- [41:28]
B
I mean, I definitely think there's some great photographers out there that are not in the crazy range. And, you know, I think sometimes people get stuck on, like, I have to have this or that. Like, check out some young people in this business and like, look for talent. That's something I always do across the board, is look for, for young, new people because it keeps it fresh and like, it exists.
- [41:57]
C
And can you share the craziest, like, story you've had planning a wedding? Does one come to mind?
- [42:04]
B
We, we joke about this because I have to, like, literally go into my brain and pull it out. Because we must, like, store things first of all, like, at Max and Collins the night before, like, the lighting guys, like, fucked up and I was like, screaming at them at like, two in the morning over at the villa and, like, in like, a huge fight with, like, 12 French men. And then, like, one of their girlfriends got involved and I'm like, don't you get involved? It was crazy. But that's, like, normal. I've been told to fix the fucking lightning. That was in my younger years. I cried. I've covered a mountain with hay because the dirt wasn't the right color.
- [42:47]
C
Was it doing it?
- [42:49]
B
Neely has spent her evening under a wedding dress because it was so big, it had to be carried the whole time. So she, like, lived under it.
- [43:01]
C
How short is she?
- [43:03]
B
Not short. It was a big dress.
- [43:05]
C
That's so invasive.
- [43:07]
B
I Know, I mean, we've.
- [43:09]
C
We've. What if she farted? It would be like hot box in.
- [43:13]
B
I mean, it probably.
- [43:13]
C
Don't fart fights. Don't fart. Can you talk to us about Taylor and Travis? Like, what would you do if you were planning their wedding? Where do you think they're getting married? You are your ear to the ground in the wedding industry. Have you heard whispers like, what's going on?
- [43:26]
B
I think that they're probably getting married soon.
- [43:29]
C
They're gonna marry July 4th?
- [43:31]
B
Yeah, that's what I've heard.
- [43:33]
C
And do you think it's at the Met? That's what I heard.
- [43:35]
B
I don't know. I think they probably are working with someone that they really know well and trust.
- [43:41]
C
Do they get a wedding planner or, like, someone that works for them?
- [43:44]
B
I think it could be a mix of both is what I think. And I hope, you know, one of my favorite things working with when I did more celebrity weddings is I wanted to be in the FBI originally, and I got to use some of when we were keeping them in the DL. And I hope that whoever it is is able to, you know, to. To pull it off and that afterwards it can all come out in Vogue or whatever so that they all get their moment of privacy.
- [44:20]
C
How would you go about planning that wedding?
- [44:23]
B
I would not tell anyone. Like, I wouldn't even tell, like, most of my team. And for similar ones in the past, that's how I did it. And you, like.
- [44:36]
C
Do you tell your partner?
- [44:37]
B
Probably. Yes. That's probably the only person. But, like, you don't tell your friends? You don't tell your parents?
- [44:42]
C
No. For the rest of the team, you would just say, we're planning this a list wedding.
- [44:47]
B
I'd kind of use different names and different details and not make a big deal out of it.
- [44:52]
C
Yeah. You can't be like, we're planning this wedding.
- [44:54]
B
Treat it as much as, like, any other wedding until you have to get into, like, all the security parts.
- [45:00]
C
And is that really what makes it different?
- [45:02]
B
Yeah, I mean, I think this one. There's just been such a ruckus about it. Like, I just. I worry it's going to be just such a mess. A mess. Just like, people are waiting, like, on July 4th.
- [45:15]
C
You know, I don't know how it could not be.
- [45:16]
B
Yeah.
- [45:17]
C
And they also need a huge venue that is closed, so it makes sense that it would be the Met or something. It's just weird to me that they would do it in New York. I feel like it's. Maybe they're like, yeah. Trying to make us think that they're doing it in New York, but really they're going to do it. If I were them, I would do it on an island. Like, I would do it somewhere where I fly everyone in, and then it's, like, completely closed off. Insecurity. And I control everything.
- [45:40]
B
I have a feeling there's a lot of really brilliant people behind it, and it will probably shock us all, and hopefully we'll just miss it until the next day, and then everyone will know.
- [45:52]
C
Okay, Steph Cove, thank you for being here. Queen of the wedding industry, giving us the best tea. Thank you for everything.
- [45:59]
B
Me, I can't wait till you have a wedding one day.
- [46:03]
C
I know it's going to be scary.
- [46:05]
B
Back. Back with your fam.
- [46:07]
C
Oh, my God. You had to do a lot of therapy for us.
- [46:09]
B
I will say one thing about weddings is they sometimes do bring out different parts of people. Soon as the wedding's over, they come back. Okay, good.
- [46:19]
C
So if you are dealing with a monster, you're getting married, just know your person's gonna be back soon.
- [46:24]
B
Yeah. It's just a lot. A lot of emotions.
- [46:26]
C
It is. It is. Okay, well, stay rich, queen.
- [46:36]
B
You want to get your backyard summer
- [46:37]
C
ready, but you don't want to break the bank. Wayfair gets it.
- [46:40]
B
Planning on dining al fresco or relaxing poolside? Wayfair has everything you need to prep your space.
- [46:46]
C
Shop now and save up to 70%
- [46:48]
B
off during Wayfair's 4th of July clearance. Score huge deals on outdoor furniture, area rugs, and more.
- [46:53]
C
We're talking thousands of products for every style and budget. Plus surprise flash deals.
- [46:58]
B
July 6th.
- [46:59]
C
Don't wait. Shop. Wayfair's 4th of July clearance now through
- [47:02]
B
July 6th at wayfair. Com. Wayfair.
- [47:04]
C
Every style, every home.