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I, like, sort of hate this bag, you guys. So today's episode is all about why I hate my Birkin. Why? I think that it is crazy that everyone thinks that these are investment bags. What to actually invest in instead. And yeah, I'm gonna spill the tea on this luxury asset because, girl, this became a symbol of success and money, and we need to investigate how we got here and if that's even true. Not because it's not beautiful. It's beautiful. And not because. Not because you're not iconic. You are iconic. Okay, girl? But it's because buying this was one of the worst financial decisions I've ever made. Right behind when I invested in a powdered coconut water company during the pand is a story for another time. And by the way, we might be out on Birkins, but we are always in on future rich person. My book, which you should pre order@mrsdowjones.com it is the new rules for building wealth. Even if you are broke, stuck, and that billionaire won't text you back, and I promise it's going to change your life. So make sure that you pre order now. But first, let's get into the MDJ Market report. So we know what's even happening on Wall street these days. It's brewed fresh daily. Okay. Welcome to the first edition of the Mrs. Dow Jones Market Report. This is basically where I take you through the top stories going on in finance, in market news and celebrity money pop culture. Just so you're up to date and we can kiki a little before the main episode. Okay, first up, the 2026 Winter Olympics are underway. They're in Italy. Everyone is Instagramming their plates of pasta. But what they're not talking about is that the gold medals are actually worth double what they were in Paris 20. But here's the catch. They're actually smaller. And that is because gold is trading near all time highs. And just to fill you in, the reason that gold skyrockets in price sometimes is because it is a safe haven asset. And so what that means is that when people are scared about inflation or politics or geopolitics, they run to gold because it makes them feel like it is a safe place to put their money. Like, you can hold it, you can feel it. It's not like money where you know someone's just printing it. This is like a finite asset that you have to dig out of the ground. And people have always gone to gold as like a financial safety net. So I feel like this massive price strike just gives us like a vibe check for how people are feeling right now about the economy, about the world. Not great, a lot of unease, which makes sense. Things are crazy, but it's just interesting to see that sort of manifested in the Olympics. I also want to give a shout out to Utah Leerdom, who is, yes, say with me now, Jake Paul's fiance. That doesn't mean that I stan Jake Paul, but I love Utah. She is a speed skater and she won gold. And Utah, girl, you know, I'm sorry because it's amazing that you won gold, but like that gold medal that you have is actually gold plated. Yeah, they didn't even use as much gold as they did in Paris for these medals. So, like, you know, times are tough, but we're getting through it. Also Valentine's Day this week and it is projected that we are going to spend a record $29.1 billion. But what's crazier is that 35% of people are buying gifts for their pets. And by crazy, I mean I did that. I fully bought my dog a Valentine's Day gift on Saturday. I hope that he gets me something back. But yeah, it's important to show the people and the canines in your life that you love them by buying them junk that they don't need. In classic American tradition. Also shout out Jennifer Gardner, one of the best architectural home tours ever. And also now girl boss because her baby food company, Once Upon a farm just IPO'd for over $700 million. So Jenna Brink would be proud. And I am proud because not only did she survive having an ex husband who has a huge lower back tattoo, she now has a company that is public on Wall Street. Okay, now we just need to talk really quickly about Elon, which like, as though you know other Elons, like, it's obviously Elon Musk. Not a common name, but yeah, the man is officially knocking on the door of becoming the world's first trillionaire. His net worth is now closing in on $800 billion because he merged SpaceX with Xai. So to put that into perspective, he is now worth more than the entire GDP of the Netherlands. And people always ask like, how much is an almost billionaire paying in taxes? And the answer is. Drumroll please. 0. 0. Because Elon doesn't have a salary, guys. He just takes out massive loans against his stock and those loans are untaxable. So yeah, let that sink in. You are actually paying more taxes than the world's almost trillionaire. Okay, now we need to talk about my sworn enemy of state. If they have no haters, I am dead. Buy Now, Pay Later. I'm looking you. Klarna is trying to get you to use Buy Now Pay later for your rent. And obviously I have an issue of Buy Now Pay later because it makes you buy things that you don't need with money that you don't have. Pretty obvious argument if you ask me. But what makes me nervous about them getting into the rental market and where I think that maybe the government should, you know, step in and not let this happen, is that the 2008 financial crisis was built on people taking out massive loans for homes that they couldn't afford. And then it all collapsed. The housing market collapsed and there was a financial crisis, as you know. But if people are renting homes that they cannot afford and using Buy Now Pay later to finance them, they're probably going to default on those loans, don't you think? 41% of people who use Buy Now Pay later last year could it make one of their payments. So to me, it just feels like we're going sort of down a slippery slope here. I am not obsessed with the idea that this is happening. Feels like a Jenga tower, but that's just me. I'll keep you posted. Oh, and then this is sort of cool. Cause I feel like it's really justice for like blue collar jobs. But for the first time in 50 years, college grads are losing their edge. The unemployment rate for workers with a four year degree has officially surpass those with trade school degrees. So we have now reached the point in, like, the AI revolution where the smart move is not going to an Ivy League college, it's actually learning a skill. Community College enrollment is up 4%, whereas, like, private universities are completely spiraling because young people have realized that AI, it's going to take a lot of jobs. But AI cannot fix a burst pipe. AI cannot unclog your toilet. AI cannot fix your H vac machine. AI will never threaten the jobs of people who build the world, but it will threaten the jobs of people who, like, run the spreadsheets that manage the people who build the world. If that makes sense. Okay, that's the market for this week. Now let's get into the main event. The reason you're all here, why I hate my Birkin. For those of you who don't know what a Birkin is, it is a bag from Hermes that was designed at first for Jane Birkin. She actually was on an airplane and just sat next to this man from Hermes and she was using this huge straw tote as like, her carry on bag. And he was like, girl, why are you using that straw tote? And she was like, you know, I've just like never found a bag that really worked for me. And he was like, well, I work for Hermes. And so they spent the whole flight talking about what the perfect bag would be. And then they made this bag for her called the Birkin, after Jane Birkin. And it's since just become like this cultural icon. Why I wanted a Birkin in the first place is that I think that I fell for this myth that, like, if you're a successful woman, like, all roads do lead to Birkin at a certain point. And, like, that is something that is very present in the culture. Like, even Alix Earle just signed that big Netflix deal. And honey, she left Paris Fashion Week with a big old Birkin, her first. So it's like when you, when you are making it in this world as a woman, like, that is the bag that you're supposed to have slung over your arm. And I subscribed. So on my 30th birthday, to mark the occasion, I was like, okay, I can either invest in the stock market or my mom has this friend who, she won't tell me who the friend is, but the friend is selling a Birkin and will sell it to me for $7,000. And do I want it? And I was like, yeah, I definitely want it. Fuck the stock market. I'm going to buy that bag. So I've had her for five years. I probably worn her less than five times. I'm so scared of her, you guys. And, like, this is a patina bag. Like I said, like, she's not in perfect condition at all. But, like, I really do just, like, live with the fear of God in me about her. Like, I'm, like, scared of the rain. I'm scared of natural elements. I'm scared someone's going to see steal it. Like, having something so expensive that's physical like this does sort of give me the willies. I thought that $7,000, that I definitely was going to be able to get it back and that it was actually this bag was going to grow in value. Because all the headlines are like, the Birkin outperforms the S&P 500. It outperforms gold. Like, this bag is an amazing investment. A 2016 study found that Birkins had a 14.2% return over the years of 1984 to 2015. Just to give you context, the stock market usually returns around, like, 10%. So 14.2%. That's amazing. And it's like this bag that makes you look rich, too. So you're getting rich. You're looking rich. I mean, what's not to love? So because of all these things and because I am a girl boss, I did buy one. It is a black 35 Birkin with Pebble leather. And I honestly was really overwhelmed when I got it. Like, I remember unboxing it, and it did just feel like, wow, like I've entered a new part of my life. Like, it felt almost like a graduation ceremony. Like, there's a before and there's an after. Like, I had been crowned part of this special group. You know, like, you want access to that club, and it's very much like an if, you know, you know, because it's a game to get it. Like, even getting it from this woman was a game. And it's a game to get them firsthand, too. So it just shows that you're, like, a little bit about that life. You know what I'm saying? Luxury fashion consultant Robert Burke calls it a rite of passage, whether you are wearing it with Chanel or Lululemon. And I think I definitely subscribe to that. And I think as a financial expert, I also fell for it, because Wall street is constantly telling us that this is an investment too. There's literally hedge funds dedicated to Hermes and Birkin bags. Like, asset managers are looking at these as a way to get rich. And I saw Wall Street Be so into Birkins. I got into them, too. Like, the price tag didn't sell scare me anymore. Like, we have the celebrities telling us that this is a status symbol. We have Wall street telling us that this is an investment. And then we have influencers online showing you how to get them and. And unboxing them and, like, building the culture even more. I also thought I was being really savvy. Like, I was, like, I said, for sure, convinced that I was going to at least see the $7,000, if not get a bigger return. Like, I saw that 14.2% return stat, and, like, the hedge fund that tracks Birkins. And I was like, this bag is gonna be worth, like, 30,000 in five years. Like, honey, this is gonna be priceless. Like, distressed black Birkin is really going to, like, change my financial life. But then I had a rude awakening because I was, like, I said, being so careful about the bag, like, never wearing it, and I was like, okay, like, maybe I shouldn't have this bag. But then, like, last year, so four years into wearing the Birkin, I'm never actually wearing it because I live in so much fear of, like, how valuable it's going to be. I'm like, you know what, girl? Like, maybe this life is not for you. Like, maybe your investments are better in the stock market. You don't have to see them, you don't have to touch them. You don't have to be responsible for them. Maybe, like, having a physical asset like this is too much pressure and you should just sell it. So I was like, okay, let me sell it. So I go online and I start to sort of get quotes from luxury resellers. And what I found was that this whole idea of a 14% return is a complete myth. Unless your Hermes bag is the most rare, valuable, hard to get one that you've taken exquisite care of and has basically been hermetically sealed. And the truth is, too, that there's a ton of them on the market. There's over a million Birkin bags on the market, so the demand for them has also gone down. And we all know that prices are set by supply and demand. When there's a lot of supply, there's a lot less demand. And the data doesn't lie either. Like, there has been a 36% drop in the value of Birkins on the resale market in the last three years. In 2022, you could get 2.2x the price of the bag on the resale market. And in 2025, it dropped to 1.4x. So the big lie is that these are investment handbags like that. It should be completely normalized for us to go to Hermes and spend thousands of dollars on a handbag. Even though for most people who you see on TikTok doing that, I guarantee like their Roth IRAs are not maxed out because it's a status symbol that will also eventually make you rich because it will hold its resale value. And what I'm saying, as someone who's on the other side of that, although I didn't buy my Birkin firsthand, is that the resale value of these bags has been completely conflated. The only Birkins that are really seeing that huge return, that are actually investment pieces are the ones that are super rare and in pristine condition. If yours is like mine and it's like Olsen twin at the airport just like has lived a life, you're just not gonna see that same return. Which makes sense, right? Because if it's an asset, in order for an asset to maintain or grow in value, you have to take exquisite care of it. Which means you basically need to like, hermetically seal it, read it a book every night, oil it, kiss it, make sure that it's comfortable and not cold, and like, never bring it out of your apartment. Okay. Raise your hand if you've been putting off a dental cleaning, an annual checkup, or honestly, any kind of doctor's appointment. My hand is not up, you guys. For me, I'm obsessed with preventative healthcare. Something that I've really learned in my financial journey is how important preventative healthcare really is. And so this year, let's do things differently and let's find doctors that we love and book appointments with them on zocdoc. And zocdoc is this free app and website that helps you find and book high quality in network doctors so you can find someone you love. So you can literally book in network appointments. With more than 150,000 providers across all 50 states, appointments made through Zocdoc happen fast, like typically within just 24 to 72 hours of booking. And you could even score same day appointments, which is amazing. When you wake up just so sick and you just need some help, stop putting those doctor's appointments off and go to Zocdoc.com financialtea to find and instantly book a doctor you love today. That's z o c-o c.com financialtea zocdoc.com financialtea thanks StockDoc, for supporting this message. Okay, we need to talk about Quinn's because this is exactly the kind of brand that makes getting dressed easier, smarter, and cost less. Quints is all about elevated essentials that feel effortless. So, like, the kind of pieces that you can actually build a wardrobe around. And everything is designed for layering and mixing. So you're not just buying trendy one offs that you have no idea how to actually style. Like, you're buying those staples that you can reach for over and over again and actually make getting dressed easy. What they're really good at is nailing the basics, but with quality that's made to last. So like 100% European European linen and organic cotton. And it shows the stitching, the feel, the way the pieces hold up season after season. Like, these are clothes that really can earn a piece in your rotation. So refresh your wardrobe with quints. Go to quince.com financialtea for free shipping on your order and 365 day returns. Now available in Canada too. That's Q U I n c e.com financialteam but these bags are special. Like, Hermes really doesn't mess around. Like, artisans have to train for five to 10 years before they're allowed to even make one of these bags. Five to 10 years? It's like medical school. Each bag takes a minimum of 18 hours to complete. There's saddle stitching. I mean, it's really beautiful. Like, the craftsmanship alone, ooh, I just found a lip gloss. The craftsmanship alone really, like, does deserve the price tag. But I don't know, the exclusivity is just, like, sort of nuts these days. And obviously, I also am obsessed with pop culture. And I do feel like I was brainwashed to think that a Birkin does mean that you've made it. And by the way, when I do wear it, like one of those five times, I did feel like I made it. Like, it does sort of give you that pep in your rich girl step. But, like, you know, the Kardashians, as they've built their empires, they have huge closets just dedicated to Birkins. We talked about Alex Earle. Even men wear them. Like, David Beckham has a huge one that he travels with. Drake has been collecting them for his wife, his future wife. He doesn't even know who she is yet. But, like, she is going to have a lot of back. Oh, and of course, Lauren Sanchez. The moment she got Jeff's credit card, like, she has been at Hermes all the do dad day. Like, wherever she travels, she's in there picking up a new purse. Like, if you are Rich, if you are successful, if you have, like, a profile, you're wearing a Birkin. This is the bag. End of story. They are this ultimate symbol of, like, power and money and just opulence and, like, everyone from Becca Bloom to, like, that random fashion girly that you follow who somehow went to Paris and got the Hermes appointment and ended up with a Birkin. And, like, instead of her feeling so overwhelmed and stressed that she just spent, like, $15,000 on a bag, she's posting about it with pride to show you that, like, she has this status symbol. And I guess, like, has made a good money decision. I don't know. They're really in the culture. It's sort of chic. What's also crazy about the Birkin resale market is that the smaller the bag is, the more valuable it is. Like, this is a 35, which is a big bag, but a 32, which is just a little bit smaller would also not be as valuable. Is if I had the tiny one. The tiny ones go for 30 to 50% more on the resale market than the bigger ones. So, yeah, this black one, it's not trendy, it's not new. I would really be lucky to sell it for what I put into it. So I bought it for 7K. Four or five years later, if I could sell it for 7K, like, that would be a good return. Meanwhile, if I had put that 7k in the market when I turned 30, it would be worth $13,700 today, assuming a 10% annual return. And I could sell it at the click of a button. Because that's the other thing. When you are reselling an asset like this, a physical asset, it's the same as when you sell a house. It's all about the market. Like, you have to figure out who your buyer is. And depending on what's going on in the world, you could either have more leverage or they could have more leverage. And I think that's something else that I really like about investing in the stock market versus buying these physical assets, is that you can sell your stocks at the click of a button. Whereas when you are buying, even if you buy a house which is a physical asset, you have to wait for the right buyer to come along and make you that offer that you can't say no to. Which is why they always talk about the four Ds of deal making. Death, disease, divorce, and disaster. Because those are four moments where people are more likely to, like, be vulnerable and just need to liquidate something. I'm gonna tell you a story about the first time that I bought a Chanel bag, which was firsthand. And you guys, I was like, so stressed the night before. Financially, I could afford it. Like, don't worry. I was like, in a great place with my business. I was in Paris. I had planned for this. I was gonna get the VAT refund. I was so excited. But I go get the bag and I get. I sort of freak out at the store because it feels like this really high stakes decision. Sort of the same as if I was, like, picking a stock or something. Like, I think I would be really overwhelmed. And I ended up buying this bag that's actually so ugly. Like, I should have brought it today. I'll put a picture of it if you're watching the YouTube. It's this, like, Brown Chanel 19. And it just, like, is not the vibe. You know what I mean? Like, it should have been classic. It should have been just like a bag that I could wear all the time. And this one is just like, such a statement. It's a little. It's that weird, like, medium size where it's not a tote bag, but it's not an evening bag. And it's like, it's too Chanel y to really wear every day. Like, I have a lot of issues with it, but even with that bag, I've tried to resell it. And that bag is in perfect condition and I bought it firsthand. And guys, I paid, I think also 7k for that bag, and I could maybe get 4k for it. Like, that bag was a big loss. So, you know, it's a tough game to play. And I think that it's sort of looked at the same way as people look at, like, buying individual stocks where they think that they can just, like, find the next apple. But it's really not like that. If I buy any more Hermes bags, it'll be just because I love the bag and I want to wear it because they are, like I said, beautiful. The craftsmanship is crazy. You do feel like a rich, like, queen when you wear it. I mean, there's something in the water there. You can't deny it. But the resale value just isn't there, you know? And I think you really see this across the board with luxury bags. And it's almost another pink tax on women because we are encouraged and basically expected to have these designer handbags to have always a single statement handbag. It sort of goes back to, like, the ick girl culture of the 2000s. Every girl had the Fendi Spy bag, the Balenciaga. Like, there's just been these tropes in fashion history that have prevailed, but they're really expensive, and you should never purchase them unless your finances are in order and you're buying it from a place of fun instead of a place of investment. You know, like, this whole idea of an investment piece really has to go. I actually think it's as bad as girl math, because it's not an investment piece. It's a piece. It's gorgeous, it's chic, but it's not an investment. Yes, you can recoup some of your losses, but, like, it's not crazy, especially if you use it. And it's even worse with the other brands. Like, the moment that you're buying Saint Laurent or Loewe or like, even Chanel, the resale value is not there. It's really Hermes, Chanel, and Goyard that have the best resale value. And even with those bags, if you use them and if the bag that you originally bought is not super rare, then you're never gonna get your money out of it. And this has harmed me personally. This would not be an episode about why I hate my Birkin and about the luxury resale market if I didn't call my friend Joanne, who I have been to Paris and Japan with on a luxury bag sourcing trips. Like, I don't think you understand how hard I go with all of this stuff. This is sort of my hobby. And she's right there with me. So we're gonna give her a call because she has way more Birkins than I do. Like, the girl has. We're gonna find out her exact number. I think it's like, almost five. And she. She really knows how to work the game. Like, she's in this world. Oh, she's here. Oh, my God. The Birkin queen has joined us. Joanne, tell us, how many Birkins do you have and how did you get them?
