Fire Escape Cast #115

Summary

Fire Escape Cast #115 – September 8, 2025

Hosts: Dan Ryckert, Mary Kish, Mike Mahardy

Podcast Description: The crew can’t shut down bars while talking videogames like they used to, so Fire Escape Cast keeps the conversation alive from across the country.

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Episode Overview

In their 115th episode, the Fire Escape crew reunites for an irreverent, lively discussion bouncing from gross-out hypotheticals and medical mishaps, to heartfelt takes on the indie-versus-AAA games debate, deep dives into new releases and gaming events like PAX, restaurant recommendations, and philosophical dilemmas about surviving if transported back to medieval times. They also answer listener emails, get nostalgic about Xbox 360, and debate the utility of their modern skills in a distant past. The episode is a blend of raunchy comedy, deep gaming analysis, and off-the-wall banter.

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Major Discussion Points & Timestamps

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1. Opening Banter: Mascot Mayhem & Too Much Anal (00:10–07:30)

• Mike invents a new show mascot, “Billy Crapanen,” who is valiantly failing at cat-fostering and Warhammer 40K mini-painting due to space constraints (00:44).
• The crew launches into an unexpectedly in-depth and graphic discussion of hemorrhoids, treatments, and suppositories, including personal anecdotes and speculation about Marilyn Monroe’s cause of death:

  “She died, Mike.” – Dan (06:08)
  “She did not butt chug her pills.” – Mary (07:31)

• Mary attempts to steer away from the “butt” talk by announcing her PAX West trip.

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2. PAX West Recap & Indie Game Chat (07:47–17:50)

• Mary recounts meeting Fire Escape fans at PAX, including someone called “Wizard of Video Games” who knew all their catchphrases (07:51).
• They riff on inside-joke catchphrases, potential T-shirt ideas, and why PAX’s emphasis on pins hits that festival “theme” just right (08:25).
• Mary reveals she skipped the Silk Song demo, anticipating the full game launch soon (09:07).
• Banter erupts over who is more “indie” versus “AAA,” with insults and hilarious hyperboles:

  “You triple A fucking Kojima jerking shit stain.” – Mary (10:16) “No, you deserve no listeners, no friends, no loved ones, just wet, wet mud.” – Mary (10:29)

• Dan and Mary debate their true indie credentials, referencing games like Monster Train 2, Expedition 33, Pipistrello and the Cursed Yo-Yo, and Wheel World.

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3. The Indie–AAA Divide: Serious, Ridiculous, & Self-Deprecating (09:43–14:31)

• The gang escalates into a silly, swear-riddled “indie versus AAA” faceoff.
• Mary defends her indie cred ahead of Silk Song’s launch; Dan and Mike playfully attack each other’s gaming bona fides. Mike makes on-the-record predictions:

  “I'm going to go out on a limb and say it's going to be fine.” – Mike (15:35)

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4. PAX “Peak” Party, Cute Game Lore, & The Case of the Cake Spoiler (16:37–21:17)

• Mary describes attending a party for the indie game “Peak,” where fans earned pins for party tasks—a clever callback to the game’s mechanics.
• She unintentionally spoils a special “Bing Bong cake” reveal by blurting out the secret to the whole party:

  “Oh my God, is the cake Bing Bong? And the girlfriend looks at me and gives me the shush. And I realized that I had just spoiled her cake and I felt really bad.” – Mary (19:09)

• Dan and Mary spar over who truly “respects” indie developers.

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5. Food & Drink Adventures: State Fair Style, NYC Small Plates, and Home Infusions (24:07–27:18, 41:13–43:00)

• Dan details eating his way through the Minnesota State Fair (fried food, “all you can drink” milk, and the “soft serve beer.”) (24:25)
• Mike recommends "Lei" in Chinatown, NYC for drinks and Chinese small plates (26:07).
• Discussion turns to complex cocktail infusions (turmeric, coconut milk, etc.), including trial-and-error with homemade Soba Cha old-fashioneds and replicating restaurant drinks at home (41:13–43:00).

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6. Indie & Major Game Impressions

Tower Dominion: Roguelike Tower Defense (43:00–58:05)

• Mary and Mike break down the brutal difficulty, evolving strategies, systemic depth, and UI quirks (buttons/mapping on Steam Deck), and why it’s the “hardest and most interesting tower defense” they’ve ever played (45:18–46:09).
• Key quote:

  “I have played tower defenses most of my life, and I think most of them are made for little babies...this game is meant to kill you, and you are going to die a lot.” – Mary (45:53)

Sword of the Sea: Style vs Substance (60:01–68:59)

• Mary and Dan praise the game's art and atmosphere, but question its gameplay variety and “replay”/solitary feel compared to Journey.
• Standout moment:

  “Journey didn't need that [visual splendor] because...it allowed you to have these incredible experiences with other people...In none of these other games, as far as I’m aware, correct me if I’m wrong, but they just haven’t really added these elements of finding other people in the world. There’s none of that at all.” – Mary (65:25)

• Consensus: Beautiful but shallow compared to its spiritual predecessor.

Rogue Prince of Persia: The Underrated Roguelite Gem (69:16–75:44)

• Mary raves about Ubisoft’s new roguelite, describing top-tier movement, environmental combat, build variety, strategic badge and weapon choices, and the joy of “making badges work together,” comparing its design to Dead Cells.
• Dan wonders if Early Access hurts a game's launch/reception (76:03).
• Mike, Dan, and Mary discuss early access pros/cons, referencing successes like Hades and Baldur’s Gate 3 (76:58–81:56).

Shinobi: Modern Action Classic (82:39–88:49)

• Dan is blown away by the new Shinobi, praising its art, fluid controls, satisfying combos, boss battles, and rewarding execution system.
• Mary asks about customization; Dan explains skill and amulet systems.
• High praise:

  “You feel like Neo in the Matrix… I went in just being like, I’ll try this, you know…but…this is my pick. This will be pretty high up on my game of the year, I think.” – Dan (84:16–87:05)

Hell is Us: A Nonlinear, No-Handholding Standout (90:00–93:10)

• Dan (and Bonk) are intrigued by its lack of quest markers, cryptic maps, and oppressive, annihilation-inspired atmosphere.
• Key mechanic: All information is found or inferred by the player—there’s no handholding by design.

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7. Movies: Nostalgia & Comedy (29:36–39:59, 104:01–108:09)

• Mary reviews seeing “Naked Gun” in a luxury dinner theater—praises its relentless joke pace and physical comedy (31:40).
• Other “so stupid they’re genius” comedies discussed: Wet Hot American Summer, Walk Hard, Face/Off, Popstar, Starship Troopers, Hot Shots, Tropic Thunder.

  “Wet Hot is probably mine.” – Mike (105:49) “[Face/Off] is a movie that is not sold as a comedy...but it is stupid as hell and I love it.” – Dan (107:58)

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8. Food & Time Travel—Philosophical Hypotheticals (110:09–124:45)

• The trio imagines being dropped naked, Terminator-style, into medieval “castle times,” debating what knowledge or skills they could use to impress or survive.
• Hilarious brainstorms include: teaching them how to make simple cocktails (Mike), inventing new makeup/fashion (Mary), singing Beatles/Taylor Swift songs, boasting about modern vocabulary “(I could tell them ‘Riz’)”—and joking existential crises about their utter lack of useful skills:

  “I have no skills. Three other times. Or some could argue this time.” – Dan (128:35)

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9. Listener Emails: Game Design Mistakes, Brute Force, and Metal Gear Ladders (129:46–137:16)

• Accidentally beating games the hard way: Mary confesses to defeating a Tunic boss using only a stick, not realizing she missed the sword pick-up; Mike and Dan reminisce about self-imposed “permadeath” runs and unconventional strategies.
• Metal Gear Solid 3’s ladder scene: A tongue-in-cheek email questions why Snake Eater's theme plays on a long ladder climb.

  “It's just a song playing during a scene in a video game. It's not a diegetic thing....Everyone loves the ladder.” – Dan (135:33)

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10. Console Nostalgia: Xbox 360, Gears Co-op, & Gaming UI (97:17–102:32)

• Dan and Mary discuss how well Gears of War holds up, the brilliance of the 360 era’s interface (the “blades”), the role of Xbox Live Arcade in indie history, and hopes for future in-person Game of the Year gatherings.

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11. Closing, Merch Updates, & Call to Action (146:01–end)

• Merch updates: New Fire Escape water bottles are back in stock, with new “fall 2025” designs on the way (147:10).
• Next Game of the Year schedule will be announced soon—likely December (149:42).
• Final thought: Listeners are encouraged to write in with practical skills or survival advice for medieval times based on actual podcast host skill sets.

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Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• Mary on indie credentials (10:16):
  “You triple A fucking Kojima jerking shit stain.”
• Dan on Tower Dominion’s learning curve (51:03):
  “If it's teaching me stuff like the tutorial...overloading me...when you're overloading me...I'm not gonna remember all this.”
• Mike on losing “release hype” in Early Access (76:03):
  “I feel like you lose something by kind of spreading the attention of the launch, you know...”
• Mary on survival in ‘castle times’ (116:24):
  “Whenever I have this fantasy...I never think to, like, bring back medicine and save people's lives. I'm always like, man, I'd bring back whiskey and Skittles.”
• Dan on skills most useless for medieval survival (143:28):
  “Yeah, I just shake it off. You gotta shake it off, right fellas, don't stab me with your swords.”

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Conclusion

Fire Escape Cast #115 delivers everything regular listeners expect and more: gross-out laughs, biting industry commentary, passionate gaming recommendations, nostalgia, and existential self-roasting. The episode is a showcase of the crew’s chemistry, as they seamlessly shift from the intimate and absurd (medical misadventures) to the thoughtful (indie game appreciation, AAA skepticism, time-travel hypotheticals). For fans of gaming culture who enjoy humor as much as analysis, it’s a must-listen—though maybe not over lunch.

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Listener Call to Action

Write in to firescapecastmail.com:
How would YOU survive—or help Dan, Mary, or Mike survive—if dropped in “castle times” with only your modern skills or knowledge?

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[Note: All timestamps in MM:SS]

Transcript

[A]

Foreign.

[B]

What's Gucci? Stanley Tucci. We're back with episode 115, this firescape cast. I'm Mike, your host. As always here with Dan, who seems upset.

[A]

I don't like that. You gotta workshop that. No, don't even workshop it. Just scrap it and come up with something better.

[B]

Last time and what did you do? Anything. I tried rhyming a bunch of actors names with other greetings and it doesn't work.

[A]

Real quick. Do one right now. Don't think about it. Go.

[B]

What's happening? Billy Krapping in.

[A]

I like that better.

[B]

Who is he?

[A]

That's our mascot.

[B]

Is he in the Devil Wears Prada? Does he have a travel show now?

[A]

Billy Crapanen is our new mascot. Introduce Mary.

[B]

That's Mary Kish, whose name rhymes with Billy Crappen, whose name requires no introduction.

[C]

That's bad.

[B]

I know.

[A]

What's Billy Crapton's personality? Like who.

[B]

Who is Billy Krappinen?

[A]

He.

[B]

He has tried several times to get into Warhammer 40K painting minifigs. But he doesn't have the space because he lives in a studio apartment and he works at a foster care center for cats. But a lot of people bring in dogs and lizards and that's his main problem. He's trying to get people to. He's trying to remind people in his neighborhood that it's only a foster center for cats. But coincidentally the neighborhood dogs and lizards have all taken to have developed a taste for cat food because so many of them are spending time at this foster care. So that's one of his problems. He also has stage sick. No, I'm not going to get grim about it.

[A]

My goodness. We're going to start a GoFundMe for Billy crap. Yeah.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

His medical bills. Yeah.

[B]

Direct the money to the appropriate source. Don't you worry.

[A]

The Crap and family will launch the.

[B]

GoFundMe Game of the Year 2025. Fire Escape will be dedicated to the Krapen family. It'll be Billy Crap fundraiser for his he has unselfishly asked thing.

[A]

He has a rectal problem.

[B]

He's got. He's got internal hemorrhoids. He does ask that all the proceeds go to the cat center though. Those lizards and dogs needs homes.

[A]

Do you think internal hemorrhoids are worse? I've had external and they're the worst thing ever. Do you think internal would be worse?

[B]

I think internal hemorrhoids are just tumors.

[A]

I feel like it would be the same thing. But it's like the thing when it's on the outside, it can rub against, you know, like. Like, cloth and like that. And, like, if it's inside, it's all just, like, wet butt stuff. Like, I would think that would be, like, easier, right?

[C]

Don't you think it's rubbing against your organs?

[A]

Yeah, but that's, like, wet body stuff instead of, like, your underpants or, like, toilet paper, you know?

[B]

I don't know. I imagine it would still mess with your physiology somehow.

[A]

I mean, the external ones are absolutely terrible. They are. They were way worse than I expected when I got my first one.

[B]

Just poke and drain, baby.

[A]

No. That's what my doctor said. So I got back from New Orleans. New Orleans, where I got my hemorrhoid. And I came back and I was like, my butt hurts, Doc.

[B]

Wait, why do you. What do you. What about you? You know, specifically where you got it?

[A]

Yeah. Because I remember thinking, like. Because I was. It was my dad's 50th, and we went to New Orleans, and I remember, like, near the end of the trip thinking like, oh, this is just one of those things where I've been traveling, and, like, that's why my butt hurts. And it's like, when I wipe, it hurts. And so, you know, you travel sometimes and your butt gets weird. So I was describing it to my father as you do, and he has also had hemorrhoids. And he was like, no, it sounds like you're describing a hemorrhoid. And I was like, I don't know. I don't know. He's like, yeah, you got to see a doctor when you get back. So I remember waiting, like, I can't wait to get back to Minnesota so I can check on my butt at a doctor. And he did tell me, doctor, I.

[B]

Think you have talked about this. And he's like, you can either, like, lancet or just the way he put.

[A]

It, I'll never forget. He's like, oh, you can wait it out. Within a week, it'll be gone. Or I can take a scalpel. You're going to bite on, like, a belt thing, and I'm going to go.

[B]

Oh, yeah, with a scalpel.

[A]

Yeah. I think he said, it involves me taking a scalpel to your asshole. And I remember just being like, oh, I'll fucking wait.

[B]

And I did the first time, Doc.

[C]

I'm gonna have to pull my pants down again.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

The fourth time this week in front of a strange but attractive man.

[A]

I mean, look, as a man who had ball surgery when he was 18, I kind of don't have Any. Any. I'm fine with that. Assholes, dicks, whatever. I gotta show to a doctor. It's just some, you know.

[B]

Yeah, sometimes you do it and they don't even want to see it.

[A]

Yeah, sometimes I just go in for my physical and it's just like, yeah, you have a. You have a sinus infection.

[C]

What about my butthole?

[B]

I don't need to see your asshole to know that.

[C]

What happens to my butthole when I sneeze? Is it normal? Is it normal?

[A]

I just shit every time I sneeze?

[C]

Get in there, doc.

[B]

You're asking me what's my temperature?

[A]

I got no problem with that. It's just.

[C]

What are the latest suppositories?

[A]

Oh, yeah, what do you got?

[B]

You're taking the suppository?

[A]

I have done the suppository stuff during the hemorrhoid times, yes.

[B]

Oh, really? Wait, that's easy. They prescribe suppositories for hemorrhoids.

[A]

It's like when. It's like a cream thing.

[B]

Oh, no, no, no, no, no, no. I'm talking about the big butt pills.

[C]

We're like, not even 10 minutes in. There's just so much anal.

[A]

I'm like. You know, a suppository can be like. It's like a little candle you put in your butthole.

[C]

Like a nice little candle.

[A]

It is, because it, like. It's like a cream that, like, you just put in there and it just like. Instead of like just rubbing cream all over your asshole, you just put the little candle up there and it melt from your butt warmth and then just makes it all, you know, smoother or whatever.

[B]

Oh, that's news to me. I thought it was a big pill that you just.

[A]

I think you can. I think there are. I've never done pill. Pill butt stuff. Marilyn Monroe used to put all of her drugs in her.

[B]

Well, that's a. That's hot. B. I'm not saying. You can't.

[A]

She died, Mike.

[B]

You can't. That's not how she died.

[C]

She did not.

[A]

It might have been.

[B]

I thought she killed herself with pills.

[C]

She did, but she's saying that she specifically killed herself butt chugging pills.

[B]

Or did she overdose on something?

[A]

I think it was an overdose. It was not a suicide. But were they intentional?

[B]

But were they suicidal?

[C]

We don't know.

[B]

It could have been suicide. But leaving that aside, I don't know that it was the. But only.

[C]

Dan, the biggest I'm looking at but doctor and awareness person we know is did Marilyn Monroe kill herself via butt Injected pills.

[A]

It was a barbiturate overdose on August 4, 1962.

[B]

Barb Uates. She like control f butt f anus, huh?

[A]

Yeah. It's not really talking about her butt at all.

[C]

I don't think that her. She's an accused communist. Say that and accused everybody's communist.

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

I don't think her obituary is going to cover whether or not she consumed the pills orally or bodily.

[A]

I guess.

[B]

Yeah. Funny. New York Times a bit.

[A]

I guess it doesn't say that now. It doesn't mention anything about the butt.

[C]

You're just making up history. And I hope her estate sues you.

[A]

For that would be a story of Marilyn Monroe versus Reichert Mary.

[B]

How's your ass?

[C]

She did not butt chug her pills. I'm great. My ass is great. What do you guys want to know? I have seen one doctor recently. They didn't see my asshole. What else is going on? Oh, I went to pax.

[B]

Oh, yeah.

[A]

Oh.

[C]

Desperately trying to change subject.

[A]

Sure. Yeah. Yeah. Good work.

[C]

Yeah, I went. Don't worry. PAX always does. I went to PAX West. I had a. A good time. We did a switch meetup. I met a fire escape fan there. I believe their name was wizard of Video Games. And they knew all of our catchphrases. They told me not to kiss it. They knew.

[A]

What are our catchphrases?

[C]

All secrets.

[B]

Less talky, more Dewey.

[A]

Oh, sure, sure.

[C]

Dance and microphone.

[B]

Control f anus.

[A]

That's the shirt we got coming out.

[B]

Yeah. Oh, what was it? There is. Let me look it up. You keep talking.

[A]

I'm with Control f anus. With an arrow.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Ask me about my control f anus. Yeah.

[C]

Ask me about my an us.

[A]

We're gonna have a whole line. Flip flops.

[C]

There's like a tiny fire escape logo on.

[B]

I didn't care for Hamilton. And there's a moon in Wheel World. Suck my dick.

[A]

A moon in Wheel World.

[C]

Yeah. That was my spoiler. Yeah.

[A]

Oh, you be on. You're on the moon. You go to the moon.

[C]

Yeah, yeah, I go to the moon. And you guys were like, that's a spoiler. And then I yelled at you.

[A]

That's right. That's right.

[B]

Yeah. It was fun to be on the receiving end.

[C]

Anyway, Met some fire escape fans and gamers alike at the meetup. And then I went to PAX for one day and saw the show floor. Observed the Resident Evil and new demo and there was Silk Song on the floor, but I did not play it because it's just a demo. And the game comes out for all of our listeners. The game comes out in less than 12 hours. So there's just no reason for me to play play it at packs and wait in that long line when I'm literally gonna play it in like a couple days.

[A]

Okay, so you are. You're gonna do it without playing the first game? I mean, I guess you don't need the story first game.

[B]

I have to say, this is weird to say this. It is really flattering when you recommend something hard to your friend and they actually take you up on it. Like, I'm glad you're gonna try it when I.

[A]

When I tried it.

[B]

Or no, we, we.

[A]

She hasn't played Silksong to me.

[B]

No, we recommended I'm gonna play Silk Song to Marry and because we love. We're such big fans and I'm glad.

[C]

She's probably been fucking sucking yourselves off all week waiting for this opportunity to talk to me like, I don't fucking know this game like the back of my asshole.

[A]

Do you love Indie Metroidvanias?

[C]

You triple A fucking Kojima jerking shit stain. Do not get to talk to me about fucking Hollow Knight. You don't deserve to. You did this art style. You fucking talk shit about this art style all the time. You deserve no listeners, no friends, no loved ones. Just wet, wet mud. Right?

[A]

Everyone we know and love should die.

[B]

Brings out the best insults I've ever heard from Mary. You Kojima jerking shit stain.

[A]

That is good.

[B]

AAA Kojima jerking shit stain.

[A]

I My games this year. I am not. The truth. This is just an inaccurate thing you're throwing at me.

[C]

Completely reasonable. And it's even more.

[B]

He owns Giant Bob. Now they have to talk to me with the AAA games you've sold out.

[A]

That's right. We're all Call of Duty now. Me up. Yep.

[C]

Wheelhouse.

[A]

Let me see my current top. Top 10 of 2025 here. Let's see, we got.

[B]

Don't spoil it.

[A]

Not in order or anything. Actually, a lot of the. Okay. Monster Train 2 is very good. Expedition 33, Shinobi, Bionic Bay, Pip Estello and the Curse. Yo Yo. I, I, I know and love indies.

[C]

I bet you didn't finish Pipistrello and the Cursed. Yo yo. You little.

[A]

You're right.

[C]

I know you didn't.

[A]

You're right. It was good.

[C]

I know how hard it is because I've put like 35 hours into it. And I bet you're the kind of person that plays an indie game and goes, that was a great eight hours and Now I will just look at Kojima's picture and touch myself. And I know that you did not even finish Wheel World until I told you, because you thought you did and you didn't finish it.

[A]

I didn't. You're right. You're right about that. I finish indie games all the time. I beat Shinobi. We'll get to it. But I beat Shinobi.

[C]

Did you finish Time Flies?

[A]

That's not. I guess Shinobi's not really.

[C]

I guess it's made by sega, you stupid.

[A]

It was published by sega. No Time Flies. I didn't beat Time Flies.

[C]

Look, I know.

[A]

Listen. Some games. Look, I've been in this game a while, all right? I can look at again. Andy McNamara, Editor in Chief of Game Informer, used to look over our shoulders when we were playing a game and he's like, I've done this for so long, I'm gonna do my five minute review. He'd watch it for five minutes and be like, that's gonna get 7.5. And he was usually right.

[B]

I have noticed us men of a certain age in the video game industry. Love. Okay, I'm not. I'm not lumping you in, but Dan.

[A]

I mean, I am, though.

[B]

No, no, no, no. There is a certain. There is a certain tier. Not tier. What is the word I'm looking for? Yeah. Demographic of men in the industry who love to brag about that. Being able to see a pitch for a game and then saying the score it's going to get.

[A]

Well, it is just true that at a certain point you do. You've seen a lot of. And you've seen a lot of things that look like certain things, and you can get a good sense of what a game's offering.

[B]

Score.

[A]

Silksong. Silksong, yeah.

[C]

Did you know right away that Silksong was going to be an iconic classic that hundreds, by the way, would like?

[A]

Mary, I thought.

[C]

What did you think about Hollow Knight when you first played it?

[A]

Yeah, I didn't like it, but I came around because Mike recommended it to me.

[C]

Maybe Andy McNamara actually knows good games when he sees them. Maybe you're just not cut out for this.

[A]

Breath of Wild when it came out. So I, you know, anybody can. Can be wrong about stuff. Maybe there's a code.

[C]

You should find that.

[A]

Yeah, I hate something I was gonna say, but Mary was berating me.

[C]

Who Loves Mario is so interested in supporting indies. Your favorite games in all of our top 10 game requests are AAA games.

[A]

Mario, Zelda, Metal Gear. Yes, those are. Those are among the best games of all time. I think that's kind of a wild thing to say.

[C]

You're in the wrong area.

[A]

Stardew's up there.

[C]

Get out of outer. Wild is up there. Get out of my space. We have to convince you to play these.

[A]

Not really, no. Stardew. Stardew. No, No. I was playing Stardew before you. Probably.

[C]

I did. I don't think so. I tweeted about it because you want everybody to talk to you about how fucking important you are. But I definitely played that game first.

[A]

Why are you playing. Why aren't you playing Silksong yet? I thought Kickstarter backers got to play it early. I thought you were such a big fan.

[C]

They all get to play it at.

[A]

The same time, which is that they got it early. I thought the whole point was that they get it early.

[C]

No, you would know that if you were a fan.

[A]

You didn't. You didn't contribute at that tier.

[C]

I guess I don't need to. I am the biggest contributor in the world. In with my heart. I love that game. I will be awake tomorrow. I'm taking the day off to play it.

[A]

Yeah. Who's the mark now? You haven't even played this game and you're seeing its praises.

[C]

I like to consider myself the Andy McNamara of indie games. And I can tell you very soon that that game is going to be a fucking 10 each. Shit.

[A]

You know what? It will get tens. You're right. It will get tens. And I do believe that you will give it a 10 if you fuse it sounds like.

[B]

Sounds like you're. You're kind of being a Dan Reichert mark here. Like they could do anything they want. Silksong and you give it a 10.

[C]

No, no. I don't know.

[A]

I'd like to pictures now of a little bug guy.

[C]

I think that it could turn anyway. But I believe in my heart of hearts that this is going to be a banger. But this is all going to be like bad air by the time this airs because the game will already be out.

[A]

Right.

[C]

But you're.

[A]

That's. What a safe bet. What a safe bet that it's going to be the sequel to this beloved.

[B]

Game is going to be 10 out of 10. It's 9:50 Eastern. The night before Anybody's playing this game.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

I'm going to go out a limb and say it's going to be fine. And I'll probably be wrong when this episode goes up. But if I'm right, everybody's gonna say, look, At. Mike was right. He's the Andy McNamara of indie games.

[C]

Yeah, they will.

[A]

So I. I wanna make clear. You're playing with Andy McNair all the.

[C]

Time and Dan's just a loser. But, Mike, if I can just address you for a second, I feel like this is a really good bet that you might be right and I might be right, and Dan was just in the room, probably farting.

[A]

I. Well, yeah, I think it's gonna be an 8.75. That's. I think I would give the first one an 8.75. And I think this is going to be about the same.

[B]

Same score as Resident Evil 6. I. Now I'm throwing everybody under the bus.

[A]

Now you're sitting on Tim Terry, Bring up more gaming former personalities from 2011. Yeah, I know.

[B]

We're through half the staff.

[A]

I'm good.

[B]

I can't talk shit about my boss. No, just kidding. Just in case. Berts, if you're listening, I have nothing. Birds knows everything.

[C]

I respect you as a man.

[B]

He knows a lot about bourbon.

[C]

Anyway, I was at PAX and I got invited to the Peak party, which is that game I like, and I was really excited.

[B]

It's an indie game.

[C]

Dan, you invited to this? Dan? You haven't heard about it?

[A]

I streamed it before fucking anyone. You check the timestamps? I got the email about Peak and I immediately went to Discord and I said, we gotta stream this. This sounds great. We streamed it before anyone. We played it before you, Mary. Sorry.

[C]

This is like some bad art. Yeah, it was like, oh, it looks great.

[A]

I love the art.

[C]

Smelly Wind. So I was playing, I went to the Peak party, and it was really smart. When you walk in, they gave everybody sashes. And then there was different ways to get pins by doing things at the party, like stealing their merch or getting a drink at the bar. And then the bartender would give you a pin that had drink on it to add to your sash, just like they do in the game, which is really cute. And I think pins are like a.

[B]

Big PAX pastime, too, right?

[C]

They are. I mean, I think these were, like, kind of rudimentary pins. They weren't like those really nice coveted PAX pins. But nevertheless, it was like, a cute idea.

[B]

Oh, no. Yeah, that's what I'm saying. It seems it's on theme in several ways.

[C]

It's on theme, and they just kind of made an active effort to make it a silly, cheeky thing to experience. There were eight pins, and one of them was to find what's that stupid thing in oh Bing bong to find Bing bong in the game. Now for people who actually played the game and aren't just like trying to pretend that they play the game, Bing bong is this like green little fish frog that you can pick up in the very beginning of the game and you can actually carry him with you. Fun lore for people who actually know indie games is that the devs used to actually talk to players through bing bong and, and like listen to them only if it was a public game. They weren't like listening to your children but like if you were live streaming peak and you were like, hi Bing Bong. Bing bong as a dev would come back and be like hi and like actually talk to them, which is very funny and cheeky. Anyway, the last button was find Bing Bing Bong. And I couldn't find this little thing anywhere. I looked all over the party, like went to all the different corners of the space. I couldn't find it. And then I've been at this party for like an hour, having a couple drinks, getting a little, getting a little sauce. And the dev comes on the mic to say to everybody, thank you so much for coming to this party. You know, this is a humble team. I think this team is literally a baker's dozen. It's a very small group and they, they make multiple games. So only a portion of the team made peak. This is a small group of people who made this like monumental awesome game. He's like being super thankful and he's like, I have a treat for you guys. My girlfriend handmade the cake and she's gonna bring it out right now. And everyone's like, oh my gosh, that's so cute. And me with my like drunk gamer brain, I'm like, where's this fucking last thing so I can get my final eighth pin. And as they walk out with this cake, it's in these like, it looks like sheet cake boxes, right? Like really nice rectangular boxes of cake. There's like four of them. So it's a big ass cake. And as they walk out, they're all kind of like being careful about opening it. And I just say at the top of my lungs, oh my God, is the cake Bing bong? And the girlfriend looks at me and gives me the shush. And I realized that I had just spoiled her cake and I felt really bad.

[A]

You just yelled it nice.

[C]

I yelled it like I would have screamed the karaoke song that I wanted to play next. I was out of my gourd and.

[A]

Someone doesn't respect indie developers.

[C]

She handled it. She's not dev. She's a girlfriend. And she was very, very nice about it. But I felt super guilty. This isn't even about women.

[B]

I mean, a woman made the cake.

[C]

She's just a nice girlfriend who made this cake and I ruined her moment. And so I felt kind of bad about that. The cake was bing bong.

[B]

Bing Bong Gate 2025.

[C]

I know. And then I left.

[A]

That sounds like someone that doesn't respect indie devs. Meanwhile, I have receipts over here on my birthday. Instead of out celebrating stuff, I'm working June 16th. I get an email at 12pm from Pop Agenda saying, hey, we're announcing and launching here's peak. Here's some codes. And I said sold, immediately streaming this going live at the top of the hour. And the publisher says, hope you enjoy. And I don't know if anyone's told you all this, but dang, you work fast. That's how fast I am. To respect indie developers.

[B]

Oh, nothing to do with the fact that you'd be one of the first people streaming and guaranteed to pull viewers.

[A]

It looked like a. No, no. Nobody knew about this yet. I was. I was a taste maker.

[B]

Right.

[C]

You don't make money off of your streams.

[A]

I mean, not directly. Really not. Not exactly.

[C]

Not direct, but.

[B]

Mary. But you were for the company that allows him to. To stream.

[A]

Oh, weird. It seems like more and more I'm.

[B]

The only innocent person here who. Really?

[C]

Yeah, we've all agreed that Mike is the only innocent on this entire show.

[B]

I've been replaying a game called red dead redemption two.

[A]

Oh, Mr. Indy, yo.

[B]

I'm an outlaw. Low honor.

[A]

Give me your yelling about video games too early. Mary, what do you do?

[B]

She mentioned pax and there's nothing else.

[A]

Oh yeah, it's a very good.

[C]

I did pax. I did the. I could defuse this the nice party.

[B]

I did 1997 Barbaresco from Odeiro last weekend.

[A]

Mary. No, no, go back to talking about. Yell at me about games.

[C]

Okay, let's look at Dan's Twitch history because it's so important to him to support indies. Donkey Kong Bonanza, classic indie game, the Legend of Zelda, Breath of the Wild. Just chatting. That's just you looking at your own stupid face for like two weeks. Gears Judgment with Kayla.

[A]

You hang on, I'm looking recently streamed. Is this seat taken? You skipped over that one. Weird, huh? I love that. Rage bound wrestling empire Sunder folk. Time flies. Jammer Lammy. I'm all over the place was Thunderfolk. It wasn't really for me.

[C]

Okay, that's the second portion of the show. We're not there yet.

[B]

I didn't start. This.

[A]

Looks good.

[B]

Oh, yeah, no, this. I was gonna say.

[A]

Why.

[B]

Yeah, why did you play Thunderfolk?

[A]

It was a stream. Giant bomb.

[B]

Oh, okay. Gotcha. That's my kind of game.

[A]

Yeah, I quit after like five minutes. I figured I, like, actively, like, bailed on the stream.

[C]

I do think we talked about this. We. Well, I guess this is the second area. But yeah, I did do some recommendations that. Mike.

[B]

No, save these.

[C]

Commended. Which is cool.

[B]

Really? Save this? Yeah.

[C]

I never do your recommendations and I did.

[B]

I don't ever recommend stuff to you because you are already, like, you're. You're already playing cool stuff. Like, you know where the diamonds in the rough are? Dan. I have to, like, kind of like, help him sift through.

[A]

Oh, my God. Insulted. I'm the veteran here.

[C]

You are the oldest.

[A]

That's right.

[B]

I've been. What have I done? Yeah, I saw. We talked about weapons. What else is new?

[A]

Fair, when you were here, Mike, I.

[B]

Grew up in the town where the New York State Fair is held. And that's like, one of the best.

[A]

Minnesota's the biggest.

[B]

Biggest, but not the best. There's a difference. See, you wouldn't understand. Indie games don't have to be that big to be the best.

[A]

Mm.

[B]

Sorry. I was. The state fair.

[A]

That was very good. Hot honey. Pizza balls were very.

[C]

You ate a lot of shit, didn't you? I saw your Instagram updates and it was just like fried food on a stick, Fried food on a plate, fried food in my hands, fried food in my face.

[A]

I mean, that was like. I maybe took pictures, like three of the, you know, 10 things I ate in.

[C]

My favorite thing that you took a photo of was all, you can drink milk for $3.

[A]

That's a fucked up thing. That's always there. I've never once done it. It's just seems insane to me because, like, most of the state fair is like in August, so that's just crazy in August to be drinking any milk, much less all you can drink. But no, I've never fucking touched that.

[B]

What is the weird. Yeah, what's the weird thing? Minnesota State fairs.

[A]

Soft serve beer. Soft serve raspberry beer. I have delicious. It's just actual beer and it's in the form of ice cream and it's. It's got a cone and everything and raspberry flavor. It was fantastic. It was great.

[C]

That sounds Great. How do you know it was beer? How come not like grain alcohol, you know.

[A]

No, I mean it's. It's a brewery that makes it it and they like. It's not even like there's no dairy or anything. It's just straight up just. I don't know how they do the science or anything, but it's. It is just beer in cone form that you lick.

[B]

There's a, there's a bar in Stockholm that does a sour with like soft serve into it or like a slushy into it. It was one of the most delicious things I've ever had. Nice. It was something witch's hat in. In Swedish. Forget what the actual name was because I don't speak Swedish, but it was delicious. But yeah, I had a little lot of good wine recently. I went to a place. If you're ever in New York and looking for a place. I might have mentioned this when someone was looking for recommendations. There's a place called Lei L A I in Chinatown. One of the most unique places in New York. It's on Doyer street, which is pedestrian only. A lot of cool murals everywhere. And there's like two rad cocktail bars. Speakeasy vibes, but not like overwrought speakeasy trendy, but just actual old school New York bars. But go to lay it's tiny. Tiny or two table two, four tops in the middle and then like six, two tops around the edges. Really good wine program. But the food's amazing. It's Chinese style, small plates.

[A]

One of the most type thing.

[B]

Yeah, but like more Chinese. Like they have a. They're doing like a beef carpaccio kind of thing but with like umami sesame oil and like fresh basil on top. It's what we got like three extra plates after we did the first one. They got amazing short ribs. Their desserts are all incredible. The early like pickled dishes to start are phenomenal as well. Just a really cool place. If people are in New York and want to look for their reservations can be tough. But if you put your name in, there's a cocktail bar called Apotech right next door and then there's another one called the river right up the street. So there's plenty of places to wait if you get like an hour wait or whatever. Nice. That was my weekend last weekend.

[A]

Yeah, we were kind of talking before we recorded about Game of the Year this year and you know, currently looking at possibly doing it here in Minnesota again. And we'll do our fancy Friday dinner. We'd love to do Dario again. But then Saturday morning, hungover after the show, if you guys fly out late enough, I'm finding more awesome burger places around here. There's this place called bull's horn I want to take you to. It's incredible burger. Yes, I think fancy Friday night. Then we'll do all our game of the year stuff, and then I'll take you out to some greasy shit. Be great.

[C]

I loved the greasy shit last time when we had the burger with the cheese on, the molten lava on the inside.

[A]

The Juicy Lucy. And then we had lion's tap, too, before we recorded yes.

[C]

Yeah, that place was good.

[A]

I'm becoming, like, a connoisseur of, like, the. The dive burger places around here. Like, you know, the Juicy Lucy is the famous one. But, like, I just keep finding new places that have amazing burgers around.

[C]

I think mom and pop diners are important. They're a staple of America. And when people, like, actually come visit me and they're like, I want to see some just, like, classic Americana culture, I'm like, I'm taking you to Tom's, the diner where half of it is a place where you can get a cheeseburger or breakfast all day long, and the other half is where you can bet on horses. And that's just the type of place this is. I like that, like, slice of life space. And I think that's, like, I don't know. The things that break my heart the most is chain restaurants that have no heart or soul at all.

[A]

They have their place, too, you know, like, I think. But I'm mainly thinking of, like, you know, fast food places, like, just garbage, you know, McDonald's and Taco Bell and stuff. But ultimately, the things I feel fondest of are these little, like, mom and pop, you know, like a lion's tap or a bull's horn. These. These little places that you like when your friends are in town, your family's in town. Like, I got to show you this.

[C]

If you're in town, you know, but that's important, right? Like, I agree, like, Wendy's has its place, but it's like on a road trip, because I need something when people come and visit me, I take them to the diner that I always go to that has, like, the greasiest hash browns you've ever seen.

[A]

Yeah, yeah, I think. I think that's right. I will want the fast food bullshit more than most people, but I would never say that, like, oh, a McDonald's Quarter Pounder is better than these other places. I like going to, you know, but sometimes you just want the obvious and convenient and, you know, delivers and all that stuff. And yeah, there's a place for that.

[B]

I still have yet to see the Naked Gun and I still have yet to see 28 years later.

[C]

Yeah, I saw Naked Gun in one of those cool theaters where they like serve you dinner. And like, the seats are basically like really nice reclining leather chairs. I've never done that before.

[B]

Alamo Draft House or like.

[C]

Yeah, it's kind. It was even like more insane. It was like a small theater that only had, I'm going to say 16 seats. And each seat was different. So some were like reclining leather chairs, some were straight up couches, but they were all very comfy and cozy and they all had a little table. And the expectation, it was not just like a we have dinner. The expectation is that if you will get a movie there, you are supposed to order dinner.

[A]

That sounds like, you know, two drinks minimum at comedy clubs and stuff. Like that's. That's not crazy. Yeah.

[C]

And I thought it was the perfect environment for the Naked Gun because like I got a big ass bucket of popcorn and I got one of their like appetizer platters. So, like it had like chicken tendies, fried shrimp, it had jalapeno poppers, it had fries, it even had like a small plate of nachos in a sampler. Hello. And so I'm just like snacking on eight different types of cuisine whilst Liam Nielsen is doing the best zingers I have ever seen. I even texted a few to you because I was like, these are such good jokes. So many good ones.

[A]

And the one you texted me, like, that movie has so many that the one you texted me, I was like, oh, fuck, I forgot about that one. That one's incredible. And so overall you're high on it.

[C]

I think it's great. I think it's very smart for what it's doing. And I also think around the time where I was like, I feel like they've done these jokes enough, the movie was over.

[A]

Yeah. It doesn't overstay its welcome.

[C]

It's a perfect length. It should not have been any longer. I think it would have started irking me but it knew to end and then it was great. So I think it's actually fantastic because it.

[A]

I think you'd get exhausted. Just the sheer like machine gun pace of the jokes.

[C]

Jokes per minute is insane.

[A]

Yes, yes. There's not like 20 or 30 seconds to go by without something. So like, I think to go any Past that, like, hour 30, I think you'd be risking that. And. And they knew how to be economical with it.

[C]

I'm also a huge fan of physical comedy that's in the background. It's not ever addressed. It's not written. There's just a sign in the background that's funny, or there's a guy that's, like, slipping. There's. There's so much visual gag that you might not even realize, like you were saying on your first watch through that you'll probably have to watch again. A lot of coffee humor that I.

[A]

Just thought was very funny throughout the coffee bits. Really, really good.

[C]

Yeah, very funny. Like a lot of, you know, cop tropes is where the jokes that they were going.

[A]

The. The body cam stuff was incredible. When they're, like, watching him throughout the day. Fast forward a little more like fast forward.

[C]

Constantly getting diarrhea and we're back to the butt.

[A]

Mike, Mike, you will like this movie a lot, I promise.

[B]

I was sending Dan clips where someone edited fart noises into the Michael Keaton Batman the other day.

[A]

That's good.

[B]

Yeah, my wife walked it, like, first thing in the morning. I was watching the kitchen while I made coffee. My. My wife walked in and she's like, what are you watching? I was like, nothing. You wouldn't like it. She's like, show me. And then it's just Michael Keaton, like, they turn their heads. Like him and Nicole Kidman.

[A]

No, she was in forever. It was Kim Basinger. Was. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. It was a good part editing.

[B]

But I am curious, have either of you seen Hard Ticket to Hawaii?

[A]

Like, three or four times. You have?

[B]

Okay.

[A]

Most recently, like, six months ago. Yeah.

[B]

Okay, gotcha. It's low budget action movie, but, like cult B movie. So bad. It's good. But you might have seen comedy from.

[C]

It.

[B]

Slightly, but, like, mainly unintentional, not intentional.

[C]

Okay. Yeah. Okay.

[A]

It's like a bunch of playmates doing, like, an action movie in. In Hawaii. Clearly, like, pervy producer guy put this together.

[B]

I think it's. I think it's, like, nice when. After we've come back from our fancy dinner, before giving the year material potential, watch with Jake and us.

[A]

Incredible theme song. Incredible practical effects on the snake.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Yes. Very, very good movie.

[B]

You might have seen a clip on Instagram or something, Mary, involving a guy on a skateboard with a sex doll and a bazooka as a reaction to that.

[C]

Yeah, everybody knows that scene.

[A]

Pop up. Yeah, it's very good. What. What drew you to this?

[C]

Yeah. Why are we talking about this?

[B]

I watched it on a. I had seen clips of it and I was trying to. Sir. I had a red eye back from la and I'm like, I gotta watch something that's, like, just gonna breathe new life into me. So my friends, like, what, as a joke, apparently told me to watch Hard Ticket to Hawaii.

[A]

And I was on, like, the Delta.

[B]

Selection I downloaded on my phone.

[A]

Okay.

[B]

And then watched it, like, on the way back, and then went to sleep on the red eye and then woke up and Hard Ticket to Wife somehow felt like I had dreamt it because it's so weird in some spots and surreal, but it's worth watching.

[A]

It's on a streamer that you can download. Like, I feel like that was just, like, something you'd find on YouTube or something.

[B]

No, it was like. It was. I got it through other avenues, but okay.

[A]

It was. Yeah, the whole movie is just on YouTube.

[B]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. That might have actually been it. But it's worth. Maybe we should watch it. A Game of the Year.

[A]

It's just.

[B]

I found it. I found it amusing.

[C]

I do like when we watch movies as a group that someone, like, recommends and feels really strongly about. Similarly to, like, video game recommendations where it's like, listen, even if I don't feel the same as you, it's something awesome that we get to talk about and share together. But a movie is just, like, so low stakes. If you show me a movie and you're like, I loved this and I think it's a piece of shit. That's not a problem. That is, like, not a big sacrifice for me to spend two hours and be like, let's see this thing that you feel so strongly about.

[A]

But when we're all together, I remember last time. It's like our time is so packed when we do Game of the Year that we were like, jake hasn't seen Face Off. We got to put Face off on.

[C]

He fell asleep.

[A]

Yes.

[B]

During the night.

[C]

Let the record be known, he fell asleep. Dan picked your nose for, like, a minute.

[A]

Oh, right. That was the nose picking. Yeah. Yeah. But Mike had seen it. Jake hadn't seen it. How do you fall asleep during a movie that starts with the sniper assassination of a child On a merry go.

[B]

Round, you fly from San Francisco and then drink four bottles of wine with your friend?

[A]

Actually, I guess. Yeah. Yeah.

[B]

That probably you get by your friend who is a dweeb. Main.

[A]

Sorry, Dweeb Main. It's like, I knew that for, like, a sleeper agent like Tweed Main. What does that mean. Oh, right.

[B]

Just woke you up. Yeah.

[A]

The.

[B]

We discovered that you could. This is a very, very esoteric part of the conversation. We discovered that you can. You can get into the human cannon in the circus stage and shoot yourself at the other person. And I killed Dan like that with dweeb. Flying monkey or.

[A]

Right, yeah, Monkey and a tuxedo.

[B]

It's the best game ever made it shut a one game of the year every time we've done. Almost did. Speaking of, do you want to talk about video games?

[A]

Sure.

[C]

Yeah. Are you nodding again? Yes. I watched Slither, which is, like, one of my favorite horror movies all time, and. Oh, okay, wait. So sorry. Let's keep going. This is, like, one of my favorite movies of all time when it comes to horror comedy, which is a genre I feel very strongly about.

[A]

James Gunn.

[C]

Okay. So I was, like, telling all my friends, you guys have to see Slither. Just, like, right along this conversation tone. And they were like, fine, let's watch it tonight together. And I was like, ooh, I hope they like it. And as it played, they were like, who made this anyway? And I was like, some unknown. I don't think he made anything else. I, like, didn't even think about it. And so at the very end of the movie when everyone was like, that was great. And James Gunn name shows up, they all look at me and they go, an unknown. And I went. I forgot. I forgot that he fucking made this.

[A]

He wasn't, like, a huge thing back then, you know? Like, that was probably the first thing I saw.

[C]

I think it's like, his launch. And Mike, it is very good. But anyway, there's this scene in it. It has a lot of actors, like, before they really pop off, and one of them is the girl from the.

[A]

Office who plays Jenna Fisher.

[C]

Yeah, Jenna Fisher. And she also plays a secretary in this one.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

And so they're calling her on the phone and asking her to call, like, the CDC or, like, you know, the government or, like, somebody to get help because they're getting overrun. And she nods, and he goes, are you nodding? And she goes, yeah, I'll get right on it. And that's like, what I just did on this podcast was you guys said, do you want to talk about video games? And I went, we got a video version. I forgot to say yes. Anyway, you should watch Slither, Mike.

[A]

Slither is fantastic.

[C]

It is great.

[A]

Yes.

[B]

Cool.

[A]

Nathan Pavilion, Elizabeth Banks, Michael Rooker.

[C]

The guy who's the blue guy in.

[A]

That's Michael Roker, right? Yeah, yeah, he's up in that movie.

[C]

He's. They. He. They do him dirty in that movie. He is, like, so gross. And they just keep making him gross.

[A]

Incredible practical effects. And even, like, there is some CG on, like, the slug things, but those look pretty cool. It's just a good movie.

[C]

It's a good movie and it's funny.

[A]

Yes, yes.

[B]

I try to think, have I liked anything James Gunn has done?

[C]

You like this?

[A]

Because he's, like, the one guy who does comic book stuff that I actually like. Like, I like his Suicide Squad. Like, he. And like, I don't know, he's dc, right? I know he doesn't do, like. Did he do Marvel? No, no, no, no.

[B]

He did Guardians of the Galaxy suicide.

[A]

Oh, yeah. I saw that first Guardians of the Galaxy, and I remember thinking that was actually pretty decent. So, like, I do like his stuff, I think.

[B]

Yeah, yeah. Guardians of the Galaxy. The first one was fine. I just haven't seen it first.

[C]

I liked the first one too. I think the second one's okay as well. But, like, I don't know, I just.

[B]

I just forget I'm the superhero person in the group.

[C]

No, I. Oh, my God. Go to break.

[B]

You want to talk about vegan?

[A]

Argue about who's the most pro indie.

[B]

And anti superhero, non misogynist. I'm an ally. Not superhero stuff. Yeah, let's top off games. Let's talk about games.

[C]

Elizabeth Banks not your type.

[A]

We have to expose him when we come back on the podcast.

[B]

You mean wasn't saying she's unattractive.

[A]

Yeah, now, hey, folks.

[B]

Ally, he doesn't. Every woman is beautiful.

[C]

All allies think that Elizabeth Banks is a smoke show.

[A]

I mean, I think you'd have to be pretty wild to say she's not. And that is what Mike was saying during the break is that she's not.

[B]

Banks was not attractive. I said. I said, to be clear, I don't think she's unattractive. Said she just reminds me of three of my cousins. And then Mary made fun of me.

[C]

He called her a prawn.

[A]

Jason, come in.

[B]

When it all started so you can see the con. Everybody can see the context to see.

[C]

What frauds you are disrespectful.

[B]

Oh, speaking of. Actually not speaking of. That's just what I say when I don't have a segue. I think I mentioned there's a cocktail bar in Paris called Little Red Door.

[C]

Yes.

[B]

And their household fashion is. Has become quite a cult classic. It uses sibacha. I've been making my own. It's just Buckwheat tea. Basically. It's delicious. I haven't exactly figured out the perfect proportions because the old fashioned. Usually 2 ounces of whiskey, but I've been doing ounce and a half whiskey. Ounce and a half of sibacha. Really, really good. If you want to try it out, you have to. You probably have to make your own sibacha, though. Requires roasting. Buckwheat groats.

[A]

I'm doing that usually for dinner, so.

[B]

Yeah, you might have to just set some aside.

[A]

I do have to. I gotta figure out how to infuse turmeric for a cocktail in about a week. Coconut milk. I gotta infuse coconut milk with turmeric.

[B]

Coconut milk. Fat washing something. What are you washing something with the coconut milk. Like the liquor?

[A]

I don't know. I'm just looking at a cocktail I gotta make. And part of the thing is infusing it with infusion's easy.

[B]

You literally just put in the required measurements and let it sit overnight or two nights.

[A]

Wait, I didn't know that was part. I thought I just put it in a pan and do a thing.

[B]

I'm sure there are others, but, like, if you're infusing a lot of stuff, you just let it.

[A]

I've just never had fire play a role in my cocktails before, so I just.

[B]

Yeah, I mean, if you make simple syrup, that's just.

[A]

No, I just buy it.

[B]

You get simple once you get comfortable.

[C]

The easiest one to make.

[A]

I like simple. Yeah.

[C]

Sugar water.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

What cocktail you're making with?

[A]

It was a cocktail that we had in New Orleans once, and it's called the antioxidant or the anti inflammatory. And it was at this place called Saffron in New Orleans. And Bonk loved it, loved it, loved it. But we were like. We were. We had to, like, slam it real quick to go to our dinner reservations next door. And she's been thinking about it since then, so I'm going to try to make it for her for a birthday next week. So, yeah.

[B]

Nice. I enjoy the cocktails that, like, take a lot of prep, like a few days, because then by the time you're done with it, it feels like you, you know, work towards something.

[A]

Yeah, yeah.

[B]

Anyway, speaking of.

[A]

Oh, he's gonna rant about how ugly he thinks Elizabeth Banks is again.

[B]

What? I said.

[A]

There he goes.

[B]

Mary Talk. You played Tower Dominion?

[C]

Yeah, you recommended it, so I downloaded it.

[B]

What do you think?

[C]

I played it on a stream and I played that for, like three hours, and I was like, on the fence about it during the stream. Their boobs are large and round. But I just think, visually, it was hard for me to understand. Because it's hard. I think that's, like, the number one takeaway I had from my first three hours, which is like, what is. Why is this game so freaking hard? They would start me at a base with six entry points for aliens and give me, like, 20 bucks for a gun and be like, good luck. And I died most of the time before my sixth round, and so I just kept dying. But towards the end of my live stream, I did end up. Once I was able to get through that hurdle of those first six rounds and kind of come up with a strategy. And I think there's luck, too. I just think there's straight up some.

[B]

Luck with it, especially on later difficulties when you have four entrances. No, sorry. Four doors into your base.

[C]

Yes. And because. Because that doesn't even include all the different entrances, because sometimes the door will have three entrances. So now one is three on the map.

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

So brutal on the map. But I found that I was able to win once on my live stream, and I was like, that's nice. Maybe I'll play it again. Maybe I won't. And that night, I went to a bar and I brought my steam deck. I didn't feel like talking to anybody, and I sat in a bar, I got myself a little drink, and I opened this game up, and I fucking played this game for, like, six hours in a bar. Well, I got, like, really toasted.

[B]

That sounds very fun.

[A]

That sounds great.

[C]

Super into it. I died a lot. But I did win two more rounds, and each time I won, it was like, by the hair of my chinny chin chin. I was, like, holding my breath on round 30. I think it's 30 rounds. Maybe 31 is, like, when they send the final difficult.

[B]

Did you. Were you playing difficulty one?

[C]

Well, there's three different people, and every time I play it, like, I think the people are very different, the way they like the three different areas. So there's like, the jungle seemed harder to me than the frozen tundra.

[B]

Oh, three different factions with different generals in each one.

[C]

Yes. Yeah, I played a lot of different generals, all with big round boobs. And I died so often. When I was able to finally get through 30 rounds, I was sweating. I was breathing heavy. I was like, this is. This is gaming. I was like, boys, this is gaming. I felt truly. And I mean this. I have played tower defenses most of my life, and I think most of them are made for little babies. I think they're like spoon feeding the gameplay to use. You cannot lose unless you're like a complete moron and this game is meant to and you are going to die a lot is the hardest and most interesting tower defense game I've ever played.

[B]

It's got the Balatro thing where you think you've won the game and then that. That one blind is like, what the fuck? Like in Tower Dominion on later difficulties, when you have four doors in your base, the. The terrain building becomes the most important thing. So ideally you try to take each of the four doors of the base and try to connect some of the pathways, try to close them off, but all sent one way. But if you can't, and I try not to reset, even if I get a shitty beginning, few tiles that can screw me over because you'll think, okay, I've got everything defended. And then they'll send like a bunch of the shielded huge dinosaur dudes through the pathway. You don't have defended like, well, that was the. The mean blind from Balatro. But there's also like HQ upgrades I didn't even realize were a thing until my eighth time through. Like, those are arguably some of the most important. The way some of the upgrades work synergistically. When you're using the mini, the sturdy bunkers, the little concrete bunkers, it's like, oh, you can either upgrade the rate of fire and the reload speed, but if you have two next to each other, you can give both of them an upgrade.

[C]

That it's like 50% more damage.

[B]

And then if you surround it with four of them, that one in the middle is then pumping out a ton of damage. If you put it on a platform and it's got height three, it has way more coverage. The yellow squares, when you are planting.

[C]

Them, they don't give you enough money. Why am I so poor? I feel like every time I play this, they're like, good job, you made the wave. You've also made $50 and every gun is $200. It is brutal with how little money I have to survive in this game. Like just scraping by each wave and hoping that I can live.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

The more generals you beat the game with and there's like, similar to Balatro or Vampire Survivors, there's a lot of smaller milestones where it's like, oh, just reroll your tile with Intel 25 times. You'll unlock this blueprint that bolsters your production between waves by 150.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

So then there's other generals where it's like the general makes twice the production but cannot gain intel. Or there's another general where the more you don't want to connect the pathways because the more battle fronts you have, which is just the unique paths toward the base, the more damage all your towers do. So you're literally trying to keep them separate. That's when you kind of fan them outward and then go up, but you still don't connect them because you lose the 10% per battlefront. It's like I. It's got that hallmark of a good Rolex to me, where a card in Balatro or a card in Inscription or a weapon in Hades or an upgrade in Hades. Like you're playing the first few hours, like, I don't see how that would ever be useful. Why would I ever use that? But then like, by hour 30, you're like, oh, holy shit. I can kind of break the game if I use that correctly. And I have a general now I love. You get three of these flames, which are basically these like, inspirational statues. And there's those blueprints where it's like, oh, you get two platforms every time. And for. Just to explain what platforms are, it's like elevation in the game is a huge deal. You can go from zero to three platforms, raise it, and then that increases the range of the tower. And range is a huge thing too, because then you can cover three pathways with one tower. For instance, by combining those inspirational statues which give fire rate, reload speed, and damage to each tower adjacent to it, you can then make this central thing with the three statues all high elevation. And those six can carry you for most of the game, provided you also. But then of course, you have to worry about doing damage to enemy shields. Then you have to worry about anti air, you have to worry about stealth enemies. Like, there's a lot of layers to where I think I'm 40 hours in now and I'm still. And I'm playing on difficulty four now, so I have four doorways at my base and that gets tricky. And I am restarting now, like, they are billions. I try not to, but there's times like I. I know by wave 15, you know, like Balatro, you can tell if you've. You have a bad run and you'll just wipe. It's against the point where I'm doing that. But when I get a good setup at the beginning and I get good a few first rounds of cards, it's. It gets pretty thrilling for a tower defense game.

[A]

I. I started it and I think I. It helped me Realize a pet peeve of mine where it's like. And I don't know if this is just a me thing because I don't retain information over long periods of time, but if it's teaching me stuff like the tutorial, like I jump in and here, text box. Hey. Okay, this is how these things work. And this is how you place this. Okay, cool. Got it. And then I'm like ready to play. And then it's like, okay, well now here's this and this and this. Okay. And then I go, oh, here's this and this and this. And it's just like when you're overloading me and you're not giving me time to kind of like learn one thing before moving on to the other, I am just kind of like, oh man, this is just too much at once. I'm not gonna remember all this. You need to like space this out more. So I'm looking at my steam right now and I played four minutes of this.

[B]

So I was say, yeah, if like, if this reassure not. I'm not saying if you don't like, you don't have to go back, but I would.

[A]

No, no. It seemed like everything you said and are saying here, like this sounds interesting to me. It sounds like my kind of game.

[B]

I guess. If it helps, I didn't like. I'm surprised to hear that. I don't remember that. Like that's how much.

[A]

Just a dumb thing where I like wasn't in the mood to learn something. You know, probably were like, you probably.

[C]

Like saw the arts style and the indiness of it and you were like.

[A]

The art style does look like the art style you would see on the window of a laser tag place at the mall.

[C]

Yeah, the art is hard to get over. These boobies are round and just even.

[A]

Boobies aside, it's just bags of sand. The whole deal is not. Not good looking.

[B]

No, not at all. But yeah, I mean, Mary, I don't know, you might feel differently. I definitely think like it's very much a learn by playing kind of game after that intro.

[C]

I agree. I don't think there's any like real advice you could. There's no like YouTube that's going to solve it. I think you have to get in there and die. Like that is.

[B]

Insofar as the game I don't think is overbearing with the tutorials past a certain point.

[C]

No, I just think you have to be comfortable with losing. And I think like this game is. It's mean. But I think we culturally have Started gravitating towards games that punch you a little bit and call you names and kick you while you're down. Like, I find that we've been looking for games more like that in our. In our time that remind us of our childhood when it's extremely difficult to beat them. This is the hardest tower defense I have ever played.

[A]

I think you're onto something there. I think it did swing in a certain way maybe in like the 360 era where it's like once Call of Duty kind of popularized the like, hey, just kind of like sit behind a thing for a little and you'll get all your health back. Or even Halo did some of that with the shields and then we moved away from that. Once we started going back like doom 2016 and get got past that, it's like, okay, now we're picking up health again. We want things to be harder. And the rise of souls likes and stuff like that. It is like there was a period where things were all like, oh, it's getting easier and more user friendly. And then it's like, okay, maybe punishing is fun for some people, you know?

[C]

Yeah, I think people like it. And I think honestly, like I play so many tower defenses that I just think they. They're handing it to you, they're spoon feeding it to you. Make sure that you probably won't fail. And this one is not like that. You have to just. I realized that one you were saying when you like want these bunkers next to each other. It took me like six lives to like figure that out. I also, like, it took me a long time because you waste money in this game, you're gonna fudgeing die like you can't afford it. Like the money is too scarce for you to waste. So the first time I like realized a certain gun upgrade was the wrong one. Well, oh yeah, Sucks to suck. Like I'm done.

[B]

I will say there are some annoyances I have with it. Like, and they're still up to date. A patches hit two days ago that now Mary, I don't know if you played after this, but now it's actually kind of a cool. They have a graphic along the. A vertical graphic along the right side of the screen showing the towers you've built that did the most damage over the round. And it's live updates. So like throughout a round you could see them like shifting and it becomes pretty helpful because you see if you click on the panel it'll jump the camera right to that tower. So if you really want to get really analytical. And you don't have to because again, you design your map well enough. Like, there's a few rounds later on by round 25, where you can kind of sit back and just enjoy how much damage it's doing. But it'll bring you to that tower and say, oh, this, this Warwolf, which is basically just like the artillery, they lob stuff. And you can really buff them to do area damage. Like that did a lot of damage. What am I doing here? Or I guess that shows me the enemies are coming this way. So you could start upgrading the towers in that area to really bolster the defenses there. But there's other stuff where if the round has not. If you haven't manually started the wave and you place a tower, you can press. You can click on it and press cancel and it'll refund you in full because the wave is not started. However, to your point, if you accidentally select the wrong upgrade to the tower, there's three upgrades for those who haven't played it that can fuck you over because yeah, you're. You're spending every dollar pretty preciously in like the mid game. So if I select one that's like, oh, if this tower has no adjacent buildings, it does an extra 10 damage. But if you accidentally click that and it does have an adjacent building, you can't undo it. So like, I would love for them to undo that cancel because sometimes I'm just going. Especially on Steam Deck. The Steam Deck is you're basically using your right thumb to move towers around. I use the haptic pad as opposed to the analog stick. You can accidentally misplace stuff there. And it's nice that you can recall them in between rounds. But the fact that you can't recall upgrades is really frustrating because especially, I don't know, it's just the heat of the moment stuff kicks in when you're later into some of those rounds. And it's.

[C]

It's nice that you can buy stuff in the middle of the round because like I have on accident also hit start the round when I didn't mean to, but I could quickly place things during the round, which I appreciate. I will just say that their Steam Deck controls not great. No A is start the round. Are you kidding me? That's just like not a good button to use for start. Enemies coming at my face. Like they. They really should have thought that schematic through and I accidentally started round so often.

[A]

So are you like placing things and prepping and stuff with other buttons and then A is to Start.

[C]

No matter the context, you want to use right triggers to place things and rotate. A is to start the round.

[A]

Like start should be start, or just anything but A. Basically.

[C]

I could not agree more. I've accidentally pressed it and I also pressed it because I was like, there's no way that starts around. And it fucking did.

[A]

Huh?

[B]

Yeah. I stick to the triggers to rotate stuff and then the haptic. And then I move the cursor. Literally. I literally move the cursor to start wave on the screen to avoid that.

[A]

I've never tried the haptic thing on the Steam Deck. I have not really used that as a mouse before.

[B]

It's nice.

[A]

Pretty good.

[B]

Yeah. It's so much more responsive than, like. It gives you so much more room for error because you can swipe really quickly across the screen, but it's really responsive when you correct as well. So it does, for me at least, feel pretty natural. As opposed to the analog stick, which is. Can be. Feel pretty hefty in that kind of game with a cursor.

[A]

And if it is like kind of a mouse and keyboard type thing, is it like, are you pressing down on it to click or are you doing like R2 or something?

[B]

R2 is a place, and then L2 rotates the towers.

[A]

Okay. Okay.

[B]

L1, R1. Do something in that game. What do they do? I forget. So, yeah, no, I just stick to the triggers to Mary's point to avoid the accidental face button presses, which are tied to pretty important functions in that game, huh? I hope they'll update it with touch controls. Doesn't have them right now or. No, it does.

[C]

It.

[B]

I've not actually. I don't remember trying.

[A]

I would think a game like that would be conducive to iPad or something, right?

[B]

I hope they do.

[C]

They make a wonderful iPhone game. And it looks like it, but. No, it does.

[A]

Yeah, it does.

[B]

I don't think. Yeah. I will say also, even on Steam Deck, in later rounds, I have a release Steam Deck model. It was chugging a bit later on when you have 80 artillery cannons and 60 bunkers and a bunch of machine gun platforms, it starts to sputter.

[A]

I forget, on the. On the original Steam Deck, can you adjust that TDP meter or is that just an OLED feature? I can't remember.

[B]

I don't know.

[A]

The one where it's like you're basically saying how much power you want it to use at the expensive battery so you can like crank it all the way up if it's a demanding game, but you're Going to lose battery power or if it's like a little, you know, indie game with not, you know, much going on graphically, you can crank it down and have a. Have eight hours of battery.

[B]

Yeah, I'm about 75. Sure. It's just OLED.

[A]

Okay. That is a very handy feature.

[B]

Yeah, it sounds great. I gotta get one eventually. I gotta get that and a switch too. But yeah, no, I'm glad you tried. Tower Dominion. Yeah, definitely not a perfect game. But like it has consumed a lot of my time because like it's just doing really cool things roguelite wise and terrain building wise. Like it's made really good use of the Roguelite structure. A lot of people games just kind of append the Roguelite systems and all of a sudden you're playing three different games at once. This all feels like a piece and I like it quite a bit, but yeah. Dan. Dan, if. If you get bored. When I want to need something to try, I will say I do not recall the tutorial whatsoever. I've learned all I've totally playing.

[A]

This is just. It was just probably the wrong time for me to start that game and I just wasn't in the mood to learn something or I was tired or something like. Like it sounds like a game I would enjoy a lot. So. Yeah, good thing there aren't 18 games I want to play coming out in the next like three weeks.

[B]

But yeah, you should try this Silk songs tomorrow.

[A]

Oh yeah, I am gonna play that. Yeah.

[B]

I don't want to bother Mary. Mary, you played Sword of the Sea as well. That game looks really good. Kind of like Wheel World meets Journey meets Tony Hawk.

[C]

Yeah, I.

[B]

You don't know Randy Pitchford pitch for that game.

[A]

Toppy grade brother.

[C]

This is super off base.

[B]

Right? That's what it looked like. You're skating around a sword getting up, you're skating.

[C]

You're skating on a sword on sand. It's from Giant Squid. And so if you'd stop interrupting, I'll tell you that it is from the people who made the artists behind Journey and then they also made Abzu and they also made the Pathless. Pathless, which is all where you skate on sand. So these are kind of like similar.

[A]

They have a thing.

[C]

They have a thing and they know it. I will say, like I think this game is beautiful. Just to start. I will. I will say it is stunning to look at and they, they really cracked it. Whoever was their graphics lead, like the people who were doing art tech knocked it out of the park. This is a game where, like, as you solve puzzles, the sea comes out of the sand, and massive animals, whales, sharks, stingrays, they just start floating in the sky of this desert landscape. I mean, it is so cool how they make water and sand work together visually, and I find that shockingly well done. This is all set to a beautiful, cinematic soundtrack, as you would expect, just like those other games that you'd experience. And you're kind of floating around, skating on your sword with all these animals. And, yes, you can ride basically every animal. You see a giant whale shark. You can jump on their back and hang out and take a little spin with them, which I think is so cute in the journey fashion. There's not really any dialogue, and they don't explain the puzzles. You'll just see a visual puzzle, maybe, like, a fountain, and there's no water coming out of it, and so you're, like, hanging out. You'll get prompted to light a bunch of lights.

[A]

You just touch a bunch of lanterns around it.

[C]

You touch lanterns and they light up, and then that will open up an area, and then you stab your sword in the area, and all of a sudden, the fountain now has water coming out of it, and you have solved one fourth of the puzzle, and you need to do that three times. There's also time trial areas. If you go to certain areas, it literally has a time symbol. It's a area where it wants you to do something within a certain amount of time to get, like, a little bonus. It's very visual. There's, like, no. There's, like, no audio or video at all. There's no dialogue. It's all. It's all Dewey.

[A]

Yeah, I mean, it's really good with that, like, no HUD stuff and, like, just communicating to you. Like, since everything is sandy at the start and, oh, I did some, and now there's water, and it's so easy to just, like, look at the land and be like, all right, that's a bunch of sand over there. I bet I got to do some to make that water. Like, it's pretty elegant with the way it does that. I do feel that, like, I probably played, like, an hour or two of it and, you know, gorgeous. You know, all the skating stuff feels really great and everything, but it is pretty simple with the stuff you're doing in terms of, like, I'm gonna skid around and look at stuff and, oh, I should probably do that over there. Like, this isn't really a knock on it. It's just after, like, an hour or two of playing, it I think I kind of saw. Well, like, I'm sure there's some beautiful vistas and things like that and some cool animal moments and stuff like that. But, like, as far as what the gameplay was, I didn't really see that progressing. Like, you would give your shards to that merchant type guy or whatever. It's like, now you can do these.

[C]

Tricks, flip with your sword.

[A]

But yeah, okay, sure, that's cool. It just seemed. I don't mean this to sound as harsh as it might sound, but like a little style over substance, you know?

[C]

Yeah, I think that's fair. I would say, like, this game is a stunning feast for the eyes and the ears. Like, this is visually and audibly gorgeous in terms of like the actual gameplay. I've kind of felt like I've played this before.

[A]

Yes. From the studio.

[C]

I have skated down these dunes. I have. I have solved these very similar puzzles before. This is a short gameplay experience. I did roll credits on this. It did not take super long. I do think I missed some stuff. I didn't do all the time trial stuff. I think I skirted past some puzzles. But this is a short visual experience that while stunning and again, just so, so, so pretty. I have to say, like, the original Journey, while it wasn't always like the most stunning game. And Journey is pretty, but it's not like, as pretty as this. I think this game is prettier. But what I'm saying is Journey didn't need that because what it was doing was so filled with heart and it allowed you to have these incredible experiences with other people in a world that was the crux of the gameplay. And. And in none of these other games, as far as I'm aware, correct me if I'm wrong, but, like, they just haven't really added these elements of finding other people in the world. There's none of that at all.

[A]

This is solitary. Yeah.

[C]

Solitary experience. And I think it feels like it's missing a little bit in the sense that I would have loved to share that with another individual like I did with Journey. So I don't know. It's like you're telling me this comes from the makers of Journey. It feels a lot like Journey. It looks a lot like Journey. But Journey did something that this game didn't. And it's like journey's like 15 years old.

[A]

Yeah. And I would actually argue that Journey, I do remember thinking it was beautiful. You know, back when it came out on PS3.

[C]

It was beautiful. Yeah.

[A]

But that didn't lead with that is the Thing is, like, yes, it was beautiful, but that was a nice bonus for Journey. Like you were saying, Mary. I do think the thing that made Journey one of the best games of all time is just that incredible way that it utilizes the online connection with other people and the way that it limits your communication. And it's just like, man, me and this person, this random other actual person playing right now, we're just going up this freezing mountain together. And like, we're just in this together and we just met and everything.

[C]

And they might die. But I'm worried about them and I don't even know who they are. Like, this game does not evoke that type of feeling in me. Was I really worried about anybody?

[A]

Yeah, I mean, the post Journey games made by, you know, Giant squid kind of. They're beautiful screensavers, I would say, you know, whereas Journey was something unbelievably special.

[C]

I hope that this company continues to make stunning games. I think there is. It is important in our industry to make space for companies like Giant Squid that are making stunning visual spectacles because they are artists. This game is art.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

In terms of gameplay, I would like them to challenge themselves a little bit more to invoke an actual emotional response to this game. Beyond God. Is this pretty.

[A]

Yep. Totally agreed.

[B]

It's a bummer. I was looking at gameplay. I thought it might be like Wheel World in the sense that you're actually getting rewarded for exploring more.

[A]

Not as much as Wheel World is World Wario. It feels more open. Like, you know, these are like open areas, like open zone or whatever, where you can go whatever direction you want. But there's just not a lot to do. At least Wheel World, it was like, okay, I can kind of pick up this race here, or I can go find this thing here. There's collectibles and merchants and stuff.

[C]

There's hidden people and NPCs everywhere. This game doesn't have any people at all except for the merchant. And the animals are cool to look at, but you can't play with them.

[A]

Yeah, you're just kind of skating around until you see something you can probably skate near. And then something happens. You know, it's not deeper than that.

[C]

And even riding the animals, like I was saying earlier, the first time I, like, stood on top of a whale, I was like, this is the coolest thing ever. But then I realized that the pathway of the whale doesn't change. He doesn't do any animation. He doesn't play with me. You know, he just stays on his little path and I. I jump on him when I jump and I jump off him when I jump off. Now there is an area of the game that I don't know if you got to yet, Dan. I'm just gonna say Sharks. No, no, that's pretty cool. And I think that that is where they took some risks as a team. And so I will say that there is change ups in the gameplay that I think are smart and I applaud them for doing those. I just think. I wish there was more of that, but they. They do mix it up a little bit.

[A]

Okay. Yeah.

[C]

This game is not long, so I think you can. You should be able to complete it in like another sitting. Like you'd get through it if you wanted to.

[A]

I. Yeah, I respect it. It is beautiful. It's just like it was not grabbing me from the video game part of it at all.

[C]

Yeah, I understand. I think that's a really valid criticism. Yeah, it's a. It's a tough one for me. I really like this. I really like this company and I.

[A]

Root for them again, it's beautiful stuff. It is art.

[C]

Yeah. Certainly playable art.

[B]

Mary, you're playing the rogue prince of Persia or is that Dan?

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

No, you were.

[C]

No, that's me too. This is the new one from Ubisoft. We loved Prince of Persia when it came out. You guys remember Giant bomb?

[A]

Yes.

[C]

Metroidvania, the rogue prince of Persia. I was not sure about it in my first hour with it. I was like, I don't know, like there's wall. There's some wall running, but it's really limited and you get like slowed pretty early. It took me about three hours for me to be like, oh, I love this game. I do actually really like this concept. This is one of those rogue lights where you start every path with a main weapon and a side weapon. You, as you kill, you gain currency, money to upgrade your weapons or swap them out. Why don't you.

[A]

Dead cell style.

[C]

Yeah, it's fucking dead cells. And they. They really did learn good lessons here of like what to do with. Is fun to run through all these enemies or not. Because if you're about to die, I just head to the final door because then I get a full heal. But you're. You're not getting all the upgrades for your weapons which you're going to need around Area 2 or 3 because it gets so progressively hard. There's boss fights that are very tricky and you have to learn their attacks to be able to progress. So I was doing. I was like having killer Runs where I was like, I'm unstoppable. But if I was coming across a boss I'd never come across before. I'm probably gonna die. Because you gotta learn their movesets and then come back to them. But starting runs over again, not a problem. There's also, as expected, a permanent currency that you are getting. Every time you do a run, you can lose it if you do not send it home. There's only certain shrines we get to send this. I think it's like a. I'm just going to call it purple currency because it's purple. And you have to get to these purple shrines in order to send your currency home. And if you don't, you lose it, which sucks. But every time I was doing a run, I was probably sending at least 40 purples home. And over time I was using that to get more flasks. Right? So like that I could heal twice per run. Oh my God. Amazing. Or increase my damage or have more health, which is, I think, the most important thing. When you start this game, you're so squishy, you die almost instantly all the time. If you just keep playing, you upgrade your character, you get better health. By the end of my times there, I was like Getting like easily 400 health points per run, which was letting me go really far in the game. It's got an easy to navigate map system so that you can very easily jump to different areas of the map once you're trying to get to different areas. And Mike, you have a face. What's up? That face.

[B]

The art style or like the animations when he's diving, it looks almost like there's a comical aspect to it. Like a lightheartedness to it. Like he's. Some of the stills. He's like this full on, I think. Is that reminding me of it?

[C]

Looks comic book to me. Oh, lots of traversal dance. Traversal Dan that you will love. This game is all about wall running. Jumping on like poles, sticks. Oh, environmental damage out the ass. This game's constantly like, here's a big ass enemy, but there's spikes behind him and there's a rock in front of you. Kick a rock at him, stun him, and then kick that guy right into the spikes. He's dead. So it really is pushing you to use the environment to your advantage.

[A]

Okay. Did this have like a early access thing or something?

[C]

I don't know. I don't play. I never play early access games.

[A]

Same. I don't either. And so I'm trying to think, like, because I know, Bonk was playing this recently, and I remember thinking it was like, oh, didn't that come out? Like, there was like, no hype or anything. And then, like, kind of came out and no one really talked about it. And then all of a sudden, Bonk was talking about it, like in the last week. Mary, you're bringing it up and now I'm looking on Steam. It said Release date was August 20th, so my assumption is I probably ignored it because it was early access, a sleeper hit.

[C]

But, like, I. I really think that this game is a banger and people should be paying more attention to it. I'll give you, like, some other examples. Like, the weapon sets are really fun. Oh, there's also badges that you can get that can also amplify the weapons that you're choosing. I'll give you an example. I ran across a shrine. It was the kind where you had to, like, take some of your health in order to get a badge. So I cut myself. It literally has an animation for you slit your wrist, which is so sick. And I got this badge that said that if I attacked a certain amount of enemies in a row, they would all get stun locked at the same time. And I was like, oh, that's a sweet badge. So I apply this badge and then I get a weapon that's like, does poison damage. And then I got another badge that if they get stunlocked, they get poisoned. And so now I'm like double poisoning stun, locking them. I'm slashing them, stunning them, repoisoning them. I was the poison Queen. Everybody was puking. I was killing it. I felt really strong when I got a good build in this game. And when I was unlucky and died, I wasn't angry because I was like, these runs are pretty easy. I can just try again. This has that roguelite mentality to it where you can just. You just do it again and you're gonna be absolutely fine. But it adds a lot more maneuverability of. Of, like, maneuvering around all of these spikes and chains and saws that are coming at you from all directions. If you can get through those elements, they usually give you extra badges or extra money or extra coins to reward you. Finally. There's also story elements. You can run into somebody and they'll be like, I'll help you, but I need this book. Hopefully you come across it on that run, but if you die, then hopefully on a future run, you'll come across this book. And then if you go back and give it to that guy, then he'll be at your home base. And now you can start cooking up new weapons and new badges and new stuff. I saved a lady, and now I can change all the colors of my cool outfit. So you're constantly, like, saving people and then they come back to home base and you can use them for upgrades.

[A]

It's cool. I'm super interested in trying this now. And I just downloaded it, but, like, I recommend it speaks to, like, I've never been a fan of the early access stuff, and I'm not a business person. Well, I guess I am. I guess I own a company, but I guess I can't say that.

[C]

Co owner Dan Reichert. I'm not a business person, all right?

[A]

I own a business, but I'm not in the games making business. I feel like you lose something when it's like, okay, you're going to get a little bit of a wave of people talking about something when it comes out in Early Access. And then by the time it actually comes out, like, I did not hear that this game. I did not know if this game came out in earlier this year or was Early Access earlier this year. And if it had not been for Bonk playing it in the last week and you bring it up here, I would not have thought to look this up and be like, oh, shit, I guess that game is done now. Like, I just feel like you lose something by, like, kind of spreading the attention of the launch, you know, I'm.

[C]

Curious what Mike thinks about this, but I feel like most of the time, Early Access is a way for a game company to genuinely gauge and fix their game. They need to, like, buy a little bit more time. And this is a way to be like, it's on Early Access. You can, like buy it now, but we still need another six months to cook it. So that's what I think they use it for.

[B]

Yeah, I mean, for every game that you don't realize release, you also have Baldur's Gate 3 or Hades games that use early access.

[A]

Well, one of those was good.

[B]

Baldur's Gate 3 is the biggest early access success story that's ever existed. I know you're being a heel, but. Yeah, no, I mean, there's value to. Not everybody uses it the same way. There's definitely studios that are working really closely with their dedicated players. And I think something like Baldur's Gate 3 worked because you can replay that first act so many times that even the people who are really dedicated to it or the people who had dipped into it and then dipped out were like, well, now I could just play with a new character or make different choices. Hades, same thing. Was a roguelite where it's like, now they were able to like fine tune so many small things out each weapon because what people were telling them. And in a way, you're getting QA testers to pay you to play the game and not the other way around. So. Yeah, but I'm sure there are, like.

[A]

Sure there are dozens of reasons that it does make a lot of sense, business wise and dev wise, but I'm just saying in terms of like release hype, you know, like, or just knowledge of it coming out or being done or whatever, I think it does kind of hurt there. But maybe the other stuff outweighs it. I don't know.

[B]

It depends on the kind of game. I mean, there are plenty of games that are fucking blowing up now that technically have never left Early Access. Like, it was. Deep Rock Galactic had more players during early access than it did after quote unquote, 1.0 and 1.0 secondary.

[A]

PUBG was a phenomenon before it came out.

[B]

Yeah, it depends on the kind of game. Like, I think Hades 2 is a unique case for me where same with Darkest Dungeon 2. It's like, I know what the final game will sort of be like structurally, and I want to just wait and see what it's going to be like. Whereas something like Deep Rock Galactic, for instance, was like, all right, well, this is a small loop played out over however many times I want to play it as a live service game. So I'm going to play a lot now and then I'll come back to see what they tweak later. It's not like Hades, where you're playing the entire loop with only certain tools unlocked, which feels incomplete, more incomplete to me than if I was just repeating the same loop. And then I don't know if that makes sense.

[A]

Yeah, no, no, it does, because that's how I was with like Rogue Legacy 2. Like, I have played Rogue Legacy, the original one, on like the three different consoles to completion. Because I love that game so much. I was so excited about two and then like, it launched in Early Access and I was like, man, I'm such a fan. I got. I got to play to the early access and like, I got in, I was excited. I played that first area a couple times and you see like a text thing being like, but we can't wait to keep making this game. I'm like, oh, okay. And then by the time it's like actually out, I'M like, yeah, I kind of played that. I don't know. I'm done. You know, like, it's.

[B]

I.

[A]

That's why I'm not touching Hades 2. Like, I loaded up for like very short amount of time and I was like, I'm not going to do this. I waited. Hades was an early Access success story, like a big one. And like I waited until 1.0. Yeah. And I'm glad I did because I fucking loved Hades. And it wasn't like, oh, I kind of played it a bunch of times before it actually came out, you know.

[B]

Yeah, yeah, it's. It's a per game thing, like Darkest Dungeon 2. I tried and I just straight up did not like it. Even though the first game is one of my favorites in the last decade, 15 years, and they've changed it fairly drastically. They've released a DLC that's more like the first game. And I have not tried it yet. But yeah, there's like Risk of Rain two, I remember, was a. Was another outlet outlier where I played a lot of it in early Access and I played straight through 1.0 without even realizing that it was 1.0. It's just, I guess that 1.0 release day, it can be so nebulous whether it's going to be important for that particular dev or that game. Whereas Hades, like, I feel like they're gonna build up to it really well with two just because one was one of those games where it's like a lot of people were playing it and saying it was good, but then all of a sudden it blew up on Switch. And like now I feel like two is in that unique position where people are. I think that release day will be.

[A]

Huge because I mean, that's an anomaly that Hades is so big that like, you know, during Game of the Year last year, I heard people at Giant Bomb talking about a bunch of stuff it does that was already implemented and it was like, that sounds awesome. And by the time it comes out and that's all implemented, Hades is big enough to where it will absolutely get. Did it win the game award that year for. Or is that it takes 2020? Might have been. It takes two years.

[B]

No, no, no, no. It takes two years. I think was returnal year. So it was the year before 2020.

[A]

I can't remember if it won, but it. Anyway, it was. It's. Hades is undeniably a huge fucking game to where it's like, look, when that comes out, that's going to be a big hit no matter What? But other ones, I think you kind of mute the release by doing it this way.

[B]

Oh, wait, 2020 was the last of us part two. Was that the same year?

[A]

Yeah, yeah.

[B]

I don't. I might be mixing up some game back at 2020.

[A]

That sounds right. That sounds right.

[B]

Yeah. But yeah, no, I, I, it just depends on the game for sure. Because it does. Yeah. I don't want to touch Hades 2 and I don't want to go back to Darkest Dungeon 2 until they potentially fix some of my gripes. But what's the game I'm playing that's Early Access? I don't know. Tower Dominion, they're still working on a lot of it, but I'm still playing that because the loops feel so solid to me now. Oh, they are. Billions was technically like Early Access Forever. And I played that so much because I didn't give a shit about the single player campaign. I just wanted to keep doing the Endless Survival Rival mode. But yeah, glad to hear. I, I want to try Rogue Prince of Persia as well because it sounds.

[A]

I just made a note for myself like that. That sounds cool.

[B]

Speaking of maybe a similar game, Shinobi Dan, how's that going?

[A]

Oh, I, I beat it a couple days ago. I have never played a Shinobi game before this, so keep mind anything I say about it has no basis in nostalgia at all. Somehow, despite being kind of a genesis kid, I never came across this game. None of my friends ever had it. I just never played this game. Holy shit. I. Every single thing you would want a game like this to do. Like, you know, 2D stylish ninja game. Like it is nearly awesome. It's fucking. The art style incredible. Like the first area you're running through is just so beautiful and it's just one after another of that. And the combat is. We're talking about Prince Persia. It reminds me of Lost Crown where it's like, boy, it's kind of just nailing everything. Although Prince Persia didn't quite nail the art style or the story. It was doing all these combat and platforming and boss fight stuff, so. Well, this is very much that way. Like immediately, you know, you start with the double jump and you've got the kind of roll on the ground, that's the dash in the air. And it's not, not, it's not like fully Metroidvania in that. Like when I think of a traditional Metroidvania, it's like you're probably playing for four or five hours before you get that double jump or the Air dash or something like that. This one it's just like not. You got all that right away. Go ahead. And you are collecting stuff as you go. You're getting all this like ninpo magic abilities and things like that. And really cool traversal stuff like the ninja hook which is this grappling hook that feels great or these claws that like certain walls you can climb up and it resets your. Your air dash and double jump and all that stuff.

[C]

Animations are so crisp. Wisp.

[A]

Oh my God. It looks incredible. It feels incredible. The boss fights are so. It's my favorite type of boss fight where the first time you fight every one of them they just whoop your ass. And then you kind of like okay, I get this, I get this. Oh, here's how I dodge this. Okay. And by the time you're three, four, five times in, you're like, yeah, I can do this. I. I know the pattern. And. And you do. And the way even the style when you kill a boss fight and it does this like just a bunch of symbols show up on the screen. It goes, you know, kind of monochromatic and everything. And it's just like, like I was like cheering like some boss fights I would get that last kill and yeah, like it's a little symbol pops up over enemies heads when you can do an execution move which is you hold LB and you hit RB and so like you can do that with standard enemies too. So let's say there's like three ninjas on the screen. You can kind of get them all down low enough to where they've got the execution thing. And if three of them have it and you hit the thing, you just kill all of them. Blood gold coming out of them. It just feels so fucking cool every time game it is. You unlock a lot of different combat abilities and it never feels overwhelming and that like oh, I forget how to do this or whatever. Like you feel in control. So I feel like I'm gonna dash into here, I'm gonna knock this guy up in the air, jump up, boom, boom, boom. Do a little air combo and then I'm gonna do a dive kick down onto these guys on the ground. And then if I hold y after the dive kick, I do this spinning thing that chops them all up and then I'll do my ninpo. It's just it. You feel like Neo like in the Matrix. Like just like I am just nailing everything. I'm kicking everyone's ass. It is so great. There's a shield. So I Know, I'm going to do the thing where I jump and I bring my sword down on him, that, that breaks shields. And then I'll equip this ninpo and do the air thing. Like it's. It is tremendous and it is heavy on combat. It being like this kind of like really kind of ninja melee focused game. So like every time you get to like, it's not really an arena, but like there are these like elite combat challenges where it's waves of enemies. I love that. And then once you're done with opens up a lot of these areas into Metroidvania. So it's like, like it's not a full big, sprawling Metroidvania map. A lot of these stages are just like it starts, which is like a big path where it's kind of linear combat challenges and then a larger area that is a Metroidvania. But it's very easy to kind of warp between all these different checkpoints and everything warp between the different stages. Lots of fun collectibles and to get lots of, you know, things you can buy at the stores for like new abilities. And it is. Oh my God. I. I went in just being like, I guess I'll try this. You know, assuming that Ninja Gaiden Rage Bound, which came out like, like a few weeks prior, that that would be more my thing because that's also very good. And I've also played like every Ninja Gaiden game and I love Ninja Gaiden Rage Round is very, very good. Shinobi, I think definitely the better game, but it's so cool. These two kind of throwback ninja games came out very close proximity and they both kick ass. But like this, this is my pick. This will be pretty high up on my game of the year, I think.

[C]

How do you upgrade your skills and do you get like choice? Like, will my character be different than yours or are you basically just upgrading things through time linearly?

[A]

You could make choice on like certain like amulets. Like there's a passive amulet you can equip. And so it's like, okay, so I want this to be okay. Healing is more effective. Or you can turn on this amulet that's like oh, Vampire. Where it's like enemies won't drop health, but as you attack enemies, you will siphon their health. And then there are like a combo amulet where it's like, okay, after 15 hits hits, all of my attacks do more damage. Or after this many hits, this ninpo has this added ability and things like that. So you can equip certain things to. To fit your play style certainly. And then like, you'll unlock like eight different ninpo like magic abilities and you can choose which face button to map it to because it's like hold lb and press a face button to activate the ninpo and you can choose which ones you want. So like, you know, you'll go into a fight with certain shielded enemies. It's like, well, I'll equip these two ninpos that are better for breaking armor. Or this one builds my rage meter faster so I can do my super attack more. So there are different things you can equip to make it more, you know, fitting of your play style for sure, but it's not. It's not full on. Just like I'm creating a character and you're a stealth build and I'm a whatever build. It's not quite to that level, but there is customization there. It's. It's tremendous. I. I went in just to be like, I'll try it so I can talk about it on.

[C]

How far are you in? Do you know?

[A]

I beat it. Yeah.

[C]

How long was the experience?

[A]

I got to probably like 95. Completion in about 12 hours and. But keep in mind, I was trying to like kind of get everything. I was gonna 100 it, but there were like certain, like, there were these like different Rift challenges in every level that are like, really hard platforming challenges.

[C]

Hard platforming challenges. Is this for me?

[A]

Mary, you gotta try this. And it is a trophy. Tremendous.

[C]

Can we swipe swap? Why don't you play Rogue Prince of Persia and I'll play Shinobi.

[A]

I already want to play Rogue Prince of Persia. That sounds good. Okay.

[C]

Because this.

[B]

Both.

[A]

Oh, you try both. And Mary, you gotta try Silk Song and then. Yeah, we'll talk next time.

[B]

I. I really like indie games. Prince of Persian isn't really an indie game, so I'm kind of leaning toward Dan's, which is actually. Or no, neither are you.

[A]

I mean, that's published, but it's a Bella bio.

[C]

I'm gonna get into Warhammer and then teach Mike how to play.

[A]

I'll try Mario.

[B]

So you recommended a certain. You recommend a Ubisoft game? I. I don't know. I guess I'll stick to Tower Dominion because that's indie.

[A]

Yeah. All the indies. Yeah. I would love to hear what you think. Yeah. Because this. This type of like super heavy action reflex type game is not really like Bonk's forte, but she's been trying it out because I'VE just been raving about it and like Bonks, like, okay, like, she's really liking it too.

[C]

What did, did you say Bonk was playing Rogue Prince of Persia? What did they think about that?

[A]

I think she's. I, I think she kind of got sidetracked. I don't want to speak for her, but like she was talking about that for a bit and then she started Shinobi and then she got pretty into.

[C]

That and then Shinobi. Yeah.

[A]

Well, and then actually that goes into. The next thing that I want to talk about is I've been watching her play Hell is Us because that is. So I went to that preview event in Montreal where I played like three hours of it and I left. Left very intrigued with what it was doing. And it's the type of game. I don't know if it's necessarily my type of game in terms of like enjoying it, but I've been watching Bonk play it and it's. I have a lot of respect for this. Like, do you guys know anything about like the, the approach this game has?

[B]

Yeah, you talked about it. The preview on the.

[A]

Oh, after the preview event. Yeah. Where it's just like no objective markers, no anything like that. It's just like there's no quest log. Yeah. And so it's like, again, my brain sucks. And so like I would. Unless I was taking like elaborate notes on everything, I probably would not be able to do it. But Bonk has a great brain and so I've just been watching her play and it's just so cool because you'll run into all these things where it's like, why is this woman in a cave? I hear a woman's voice crying. She's obviously like in a terrible spot. Like in this cave. I need to find this woman. And like you can't figure out how to get to her. And so like you have to keep that in the back of your head. Like, okay, if I can find a way to get to this woman in the cave, I got to go back and save this woman. Woman. And then you're meeting these groups and villages and stuff and trying to find out where your dad is. And people are giving you hand drawn maps and stuff because there's no map you can go to. So it's just like you have to pull up from your inventory, like, here's a scrap of a map of this village with arrows drawn and like Sharpie, basically. And it, it really goes out of its way to not explain these things or hold your hand in any Way like a lot of games say that where it's like, oh, we don't want to hold your hand and all this stuff. Stuff none of them have committed to it in the way that this has. And it. You can see the inspirations of Annihilation, the movie that I think we all love. It's tonally. It is so dark, so creepy. So the music is incredible. The. The look of the enemy is just like super otherworldly faceless husks with these like geometry coming out of their chest that you have to attack and everything. It's just. It's got this oppressive tone that is really cool. But also I don't think it's a gimmick what they're doing with the like, no hand holding stuff. I think it is like a core part of what makes this game special. And it has just been so cool watching her play this. So. Yeah, it's hard to describe. It's not like you could look at it and be like, oh, this looks like a Souls like type thing. But it's like the developers have said, like, no, we're not. Not really what we're looking for with the combat here. It's not really a Souls like type thing. It's like. Like it is the no hand holding. You find your own way through it, which is the. The big hook here.

[B]

It looks rad.

[A]

I want to.

[B]

The preview event sounded kind of up my alley.

[A]

I could see you liking it. Yeah, definitely.

[B]

I don't. I like games that are like that. Like, unfortunately these days I don't have as much time for those kind of games. But I. Whenever they're doing. To your point, Dan, it's like I respect the hell out of it and kind of want to try them out.

[A]

Yeah, it's unfunny. It's like the most, like, oppressively dark game. And I've been sitting on the couch next to Bonk month with my Switch 2 playing Chibi Robo, like checking and be like, hey, are these. Are these sound effects of this cutesy Robot game for GameCube? Is this hurting? The atmosphere of Hell is us doesn't bother.

[B]

How is Chibi Robo?

[A]

I'll just say this and I said it on the bombcast, but you know, we. We sometimes hear these things of like, oh, what's a game that you like everything it's doing, but just like one little thing makes it that you can't enjoy it.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

This is maybe the most stark example I've ever seen where it's the text speed of anybody Talking to you is glacial. Would be too generous. It is just like. And you. You can jam on every fucking button you want. It is not going to go any fucking faster. And you can accidentally start conversations and you got to fucking sit through this whole thing. And you walk into a room and you're just looking forward to exploring and being a cute little robot, cleaning up some fucking things with your toothbrush and finding collectibles and stuff. Like, all that shit's great. I love everything this game is doing, except for the amount of times I just go into an area and it's like, please, I can read faster than this. This is not adding anything to the game. It's just making me hate.

[C]

And you can't skip it. You can't.

[A]

You cannot skip it. Like, I said this on the bombcast and people were like, well, there's like a 60 frames a second mod you can do on dolphin if you play and emulate it. I want to play this on my switch. I. Look, I. I like emulating. I do dolphin stuff. I want to just sit and play. I. I was excited about this being on the switch online. It's. It's like unforgivable. How insane. Like, and there's this one spot I got to where I just, like, put it down finally, where it's like, there's this duck crab thing in a basement and it's like a fortune teller. And it's like, it's basically just like a little mini game where it's like, you can gamble your moolah to see. Oh, is my eye going to open or not? And it's like, all right, I gamble 100 moolah. If you're. It's a 5050 gamble. I swear to God, it felt like 10 minutes. It's probably not 10 minutes. It's probably like three or four. But just for text to go through a gambling mini game of like, look into my eye. Oh, is my eye going to open? Will your money be? And so just fucking let me do the thing. It's. It's insane. It's completely insane. It's a wonderful game in every other way. It seems unplayable to me because of this text thing. I'm.

[C]

What's the core mechanics?

[A]

It's awesome. It's like, it's your tiny guy, big world. It's one of my favorite type of tropes. You're a little cute robot. You're going around and it's this, like, weird family, and the wife hates the husband. And so you're like, standing on the table, talking to her while she's making her coffee about how she hates her husband. Then you're talking to the lazy husband about stuff and he's like, oh, man, you got to clean up this place.

[C]

It takes two.

[A]

No, no, it's much better.

[C]

No, you're just hanging out with a divorced couple.

[B]

You and yos go back together.

[A]

Divorced. I think they're about to get divorced. But, like, yeah, I'm going to go around. I got. I found a toothbrush and now I can go clean up all the little dog paw prints on the floor. That every day there's like a day night cycle. And then like the dog tracks mud in the house. I'm going to clean it up and it makes a cute little jingle. And you get happy points when you clean up stuff. And then you go back to your cheapy house and you cash in your happy points. What's that?

[B]

Happy points are separate from moolah.

[A]

Yeah, moolah is money. Happy points. And then you got the recycler stuff where you recycle.

[C]

Come on.

[B]

Oh, I just wanted to clarify.

[A]

It's. I love everything this is doing. If this.

[B]

Just let me hit the moolahs that.

[C]

You can buy the happy points. Now the happy points are more like.

[A]

You get the Chibi blaster. You get the Chibi copter.

[B]

The secret to the game is once you've been. Once you've just evolved into living in a shack near the beach with no moolah, your happy points soar.

[A]

Oh, wow. It's like the end of magic.

[C]

The truth is that you don't need moolah to have happy.

[B]

Just finished that show yesterday again.

[A]

It's. I love everything about this game except for the one stupid thing that makes this unplayable. You just patch it in to let me hit a. To speed through something. I'm gonna love that game.

[C]

That's unfortunate.

[A]

It sucks. Yeah, the game doesn't suck, but that element is just, like, unforgivable to me.

[B]

Does the text scroll real slowly in gears on PS5?

[A]

No. Well.

[B]

But do they still slow you down when you're on your.

[A]

Yeah, it does. That's associated with Gears for sure. It's not that bad in the first one, really.

[B]

The first game's still fun.

[A]

Yeah. I'm just playing through it with Kayla again. I know. I've talked about it. Me and Kayla went through all of the numbered ones a year or two ago. Doing it again. It's on PlayStation. You know, it's basically just the novelty of, like, wow, I'M I'm holding the PlayStation controller and playing Gears of War. That's crazy, isn't it? Because that's about as much of a Xbox brand of thing is like a Halo. You know, I do think that, again, after playing through so much Gears in the last couple of years, I think it's kind of the series from that era that has aged the best. You know, it was good. It was very good when it came out. But you play it now and, like, this is the first Gears, and it's not like. It's like. It's not really any different outside of, like, oh, it's like, you know, the frames per second or whatever from the last remake they did a couple of years ago, or maybe longer than that now. But again, it's not like they rebuilt this from the ground up. It's pretty much the same game it was in 2006, and it's still fucking fun. Like, here, Mary, I know it has a special place in your heart. It holds up. Like, you know, I don't even have, like, I wasn't a huge Gears guy when they came out. I respected them, I reviewed them highly and stuff like that. But, like, I wasn't, like, talking about it a lot, but, like, I think I appreciate Gears more now that I've played through them all again recently where. Shit, this holds up. This is just a good game. Like, Like, I'd rather play through the Gears series now than Halo, and Halo's also a great series, but I don't know. Gears holds up.

[C]

Gears was funny. It was, like, pretty cheeky. And I think it had, like, really decided characters, right? Like, it had really thoughtful characters that were interacting with each other. I thought it was like watching a movie. I just thought it was so fun and interesting. I. Gears, obviously, like, I am biased. Gears was, like, my introduction to games. So, like, I'll always be obsessed with Gears.

[A]

And it might be like the George Washington head on the Mount Rushmore of co op games, too. You know, it's just like it was a game that was made for co op. Obviously, it's a good game if you play it solo, but, like, it is meant to play with a friend or later on several friends, you know?

[C]

That makes sense. Well, I'm jealous. I want to play through it with somebody. With somebody. Maybe on this podcast, maybe. Whose name rhymes with Dart?

[A]

Fahardi, Mike Fart, Dart, Mike, Mike and Dart.

[B]

How does Fahardi?

[C]

I think if you think about it, those rhyme.

[A]

No. Shit, no.

[B]

Are we playing Gears for Knievel?

[C]

I would like to.

[B]

I'll play Gears for Knievel.

[C]

I just forgot how to rhyme.

[B]

Yeah, me too.

[A]

Not even close. They're not even close.

[B]

I got my boy Billy Krappinen will help you out next time. He's good with.

[A]

Oh, we love Billy crabbing in here. Yeah.

[C]

Is your name not Mart?

[A]

No, I think I've been saying Mart this whole time.

[B]

Is that why you've been calling me.

[A]

Mart since you met man, I thought that was your intern name.

[B]

Oh, that's Martin Mahardi. That'd be sick.

[C]

Classic Mart.

[B]

I was supposed to be a Donna. Did I ever told you this?

[A]

Yeah, yeah.

[B]

I haven't told you that because I just made it up so I know.

[A]

I was just playing live. I was. Yes. Handing you.

[B]

When's the last time you play? I don't. I don't have time for improv. What? When's the last time you played replayed Halo? Any of them?

[A]

Me and Bonk played through Halo 1 and 2 in 2017 and they were. It was very fun. Again, it's. It's a great co op game. We're sitting on the couch next to each other. It was great. I'm curious, like I do want to do that with Kayla once we're done with this because like Kayla never had Xboxes or anything. So like this has been her first time through Gears.

[C]

So fresh. Yeah. It's really nice seeing these for the first time.

[A]

Yeah. So I'm curious like, you know, Halo very iconic as well. I. And I wonder like if they ever do like Master Chief Collection on PlayStation or something. That'd be the great way to get her in because like she hated having to sign up for Game Pass and you know, turn on an Xbox to play Gears. So we'll see if I can get her to do Halo.

[B]

I miss that older that. That era of Xbox was awesome. Halo360 era, all the one off games that were fun as hell. Like what do you. What have you done, Phil?

[A]

They. No, no, you can kind of before Don for a lot of the.

[B]

Blame a lot of people. Yeah.

[A]

Stuff that had impacts for a long time to come.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

But yeah, the 360 is like. I don't know if I'm naming top game consoles of all time. I'd put 360 maybe right behind PS2.

[B]

By its games or.

[A]

Yeah. I mean but also like, I don't know, like fuck. It did a lot back then of like XBLA was industry changing where it's like all of a sudden you're downloading these little Games. This is before, like, I'm sure there were maybe examples on Steam of, like, indie games and stuff like that, but I feel like people like the geometry wars of the world and those type of things that. That people were getting big on.

[B]

Braid.

[A]

Braid, yeah. That summer of arcade type stuff. Achievements. Like, there was just a lot of, like, Xbox Live, you know? Like, I know the original Xbox kind of introduced it, but, like, 360 is where it really blew up. Like, 360 is my first experience, really, getting into online games.

[B]

I also fucking love that. The ui, it was just like the tab manila. Manila folders that you flipped through. I unironically loved that.

[A]

Yeah, the blades were fucking amazing. Yeah.

[B]

They were styled after manila folders. You realize that, right? Like, they didn't invent that.

[A]

I didn't think about the manila folder thing, but that makes sense.

[B]

Yeah, it's folder tabs that they invented in, like, the 20s.

[A]

Yeah, yeah, yeah, that makes sense.

[B]

That's why. Yeah, it was cool. Like, you know what all these features had in common? They were centered around the games. And I feel like Xbox kind of lost sight of games for a while.

[A]

Like, oh, it was the one input for all of your HDMI devices. Yeah.

[B]

Yeah, I missed those days. But yeah, I play Gears again, Mary. I like. I like those games quite a bit. Gears 2 has a special place my heart would Horde mode over the holidays. My brothers.

[C]

Yeah, I think we'd have a lot of fun. I think we should. I think we should consider it deeply. And that would be really fun.

[A]

I mean, fuck. Kayla and I just beat judgment together. And like, even that's. I know people on it. It's good.

[B]

That game's amazing. I love that game. That was rad, that. And that was the Bullet Storm, folks. Right?

[A]

People can fly.

[C]

Yeah. Bullet Storm.

[B]

I love that game.

[C]

All right, let's do it. Mart, do you want to.

[B]

You want to talk about emails?

[A]

Donna, It's Donna.

[B]

You want to talk about emails? Crary. Okay. As usual, you can write into firescapecastmail.com with questions, comments, concerns. We will read all the good questions on each episode. Get that inbox filled up. That's firescapecastmail.com Mered. You want to read this first one from Wes, who has written in many times.

[C]

Hey, all, what is a movie that you love despite it being objectively stupid? Other than MacGruber, I'm partial to the other guys. Thanks, Wes from Baltimore.

[A]

I mean, so I logged into my letterbox here when I saw that, and I'm like, okay, do I Sort by five stars or one star here or something. And then I realized that's, like a lot of my taste in movies.

[B]

Search. Five stars. I'm telling you.

[A]

The thing is, even, like, even Rocky 4 is a objectively stupid movie. But I also unironically love it.

[B]

You know, four is objectively stupid.

[A]

I mean, it's.

[B]

Have I. I always have been a way bigger Rocky fan than you. So I guess this just shows that.

[A]

Yeah, there we go. Yeah. Yeah. No, it's. It's stupid. I think that's fine to say it's stupid.

[B]

It's stupid.

[A]

It's stupid.

[C]

McGruber is like a special stupid where it's like. It's. It's so dumb. It's trying to know how. It's trying to be stupid. Yeah, I think stupid.

[B]

Go for it. We're doing too much cocaine and steroids. We gotta get it. We need an outlet for it. Objectively stupid. For me, my number one movie is probably Wet Hot American Summer. They're. They're.

[A]

That's in the McGruber camp. Yeah. Yeah.

[B]

For sure. The humor is like. They're trying to be dumb. Like, some of the jokes are dumb because they come out of nowhere and make absolutely no sense. Paul Rudd will say, like, you. And then be like, my butt itches when he's talking to his girlfriend out of nowhere. And then fart my way into the girl, I love you. I'm gonna fart my way into that Snatches. Oh, my God. His entrance in the prequel series, the sequel series when he's riding the bike down through the woods and then he arrives and he doesn't stop it. He just leaps off the back while it's still careening toward lake. And then just instead of apologizing for being late he just announces, I'm late. The Wet Hot is probably mine.

[C]

I think we have to pay homage to Walk Hard. The Dewey Cox. Like, Mike quotes that all the time.

[A]

Though. Like, it is. It is nailing what it's going for where it's like, there is a different camp where it's like, Mike brought up Hard Ticket to Hawaii. That is dumb as. But it's like. I mean, it. Not that I thought it was making high art or anything but it wasn't this brilliant stupidity that, like, you know, a McGruber or a walk Harder, you know? Or. Like we mentioned Face. Face off earlier. Face Off's stupid. We're cutting our faces off and switching them. But it's played super straight face and everything. And I super love it.

[B]

It, like I don't know enough about the backstory. Does John Wu know his movies are? No.

[A]

John. John Wu. From everything I've heard about the making that movie was pretty straight faced about it. And like, like even just dumb things about like them having each other's voices being like, oh, yeah, we'll say it's a microchip. They, they switch microchips and they have each other. It's like, oh, okay, brilliant. Yeah. Yeah. So like, I think there's an earnestness to Face off which makes it so great to me.

[B]

What was the other movie that just came up?

[C]

Stupid ones that are like Starship Troopers.

[B]

The original one was like pretty stupid, but that's actually like, that's like, that's, no, that's almost the reverse where like.

[A]

It'S, people think it's stupid, but it's actually pretty smart. Yeah.

[B]

Like robocop.

[A]

Yes, it is subversive satire.

[B]

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

[C]

Symbolism.

[B]

Symbolism.

[A]

Oh, the film.

[C]

Students coming out Tropic Thunder is like very funny and stupid. Probably dangerous by today's standards. But I, I, it was surgical.

[B]

It wasn't actual black pop star.

[A]

Pop Star is great. I mean, Naked Gun. Naked Gun is gleefully dumb as hell.

[C]

I mean, there's no question. I mean, you might as well say Airplane. Right? Like, those are like stupid movies that are so good at what they're trying to, to do.

[A]

And that's things like, I think a lot of comedies fall into that, but I think there, there's a certain breed of like, like I go back to Face Off. Like I think that is a movie that is not sold as a comedy or sold as a stupid thing. It's maybe it's not trying to be sane.

[C]

Yeah, yeah.

[A]

But it is stupid as it is stupid. Yeah.

[B]

Because if you had asked me recently or a couple years ago, I would have said the warriors. But re watching it, I'm actually just convinced that movie's cool as movie.

[A]

Like just be cool.

[B]

Yeah, yeah. There's parts of it that are stupid, but it's just rad. But yeah, I'd say Wet Hot is probably mine.

[C]

Hot Shots, Face Off, Hot Shots part do.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

I love game movies that are like playing off of like an entire.

[A]

I know one.

[B]

I know. Here's a, here's a move. Here's a show rather, that's not at all trying to be stupid, but it's pretty fucking stupid is Drops of God on Apple tv. It's about wine. This, this dude who's like, this dude who is like a tastemaker in the Wine industry, like global tastemaker Dies, has this, like, one of the most incredible wine cellars in the world. And also, like, the rights to this book almanac kind of thing or that he's trying encyclopedia that he's, like, potentially leaving to his daughter. But he also had a protege, this Japanese protege. And it's based on a manga, which is really good, but they adapted it into a bunch of, like, white people. And it's a very different story where the father dies, and he puts the. His daughter and his protege up to this test to see whether they can, like, blind taste this series of wines. And it's fun if you're a wine geek, but it's also so fucking stupid that, like, that is how he's deciding who gets his fortune. If you watch the whole show, there's. There is some backstory to why he's doing it, but it's. It's still stupid, but I still love it. That's probably a better answer than the other ones. My other ones?

[A]

The whole Fast and Furious series. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, right. Like, they're so stupid, but, like, they play the whole thing, like, very straight face.

[B]

They're not stupid. They're about family.

[A]

That is about family. Sorry.

[B]

Yeah, it's about loyalty.

[A]

Oh, you're right.

[B]

I guess I'm just gonna quit Fire Escape cast tomorrow, and that'll be stupid.

[A]

No. Okay, I apologize. I'm sorry.

[B]

Oh, I guess you're just gonna stop being friends of me, and that'll be stupid.

[A]

We can talk about it off the air. It's fine.

[B]

Maybe we will.

[C]

I have. I have one more based on the sincere shows that I think are trying to be sincere that I think are so stupid that I have to bring a new one up that just. I think this just launched on Netflix and this might be too weird for you, too. I'm still going to try and sell you on it. It is called Samurai Gourmet.

[B]

Wait, how do. You already watched it?

[C]

No way.

[B]

No, I didn't.

[C]

You got me. Okay. It is a. It is a show about a professional chef from the year 2025 who gets sucked back into time to, like, a very earlier era when they have, like, shoguns and shit like that, and they're, like, torturing people and killing people, and they capture her, and she keeps impressing people with her awesome cooking. And every time she makes something, they're like. They're like minds explode. And they're like, how did you do this? And she's like, oh, it's msg. Because it hasn't been invented yet. And so people are freaking out over her food. And it keeps saving her life because, like, she's in all these horrible situations where she probably should be, like, tortured or killed or worse for women back then. And there's all these, like, really fucked up scenes where they're like, cut off their arms and so these people are, like, freaking out and then they're. They'll almost kill her. And she'll be like, let me cook one dish for you. And then she'll win over the guy and he'll be like, you can live. And it keeps happening every episode. The show should not be good. And by many standards difference. It's not good. But I can't stop watching it because every time she cooks, she'll be like, they don't know this cooking method for meat, but I do. And she'll like, she has like, like gochujang in her pocket and she's putting it out and she's making them bibim bobs. She's in vet. She's. She's serving them dishes that they've never heard of.

[A]

You know, you. I thought about that with time travel stuff a lot where it's like, oh, if you went back with a assault rifle or you went back with an iPhone or something, they would be like, this is crazy. This is awesome. But like, food wise, like, I don't know if I brought back a thing of like, super chunk peanut butter.

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

They'd be like, this is fucking crazy.

[C]

It's insane. He's not. How does he. How did he make this? Yes. And she, like, keeps doing it. She, like, she keeps using French cooking methods, which obviously they're not familiar with. They don't even know what that is. And they're like, their minds keep getting blown by the things that she's inventing. But it's also, like, poorly done in the sense that, like, this is almost silly. They're trying to put a bromance in there. It is a joke. The first episode is hard to get through. And I know people who, like, watch this will be like, how did Mary watch this? And I'm telling you, I actually skipped some of the first episode and got to the part where she actually starts cooking. And that is so good. People freak out when they taste her cooking.

[A]

What? This is an interesting concept because, like, what do you think if you went back? Because, like, yeah, I don't know what it is.

[C]

A dream of a child.

[A]

Yeah. Medieval times. They're probably just like, I don't know, eating a Leg of a cow. And I don't know if they had fire or whatever, how they heated it up or whatever, but like, imagine if you brought a. No, they had fire. I know. The cooking situation. I don't know. But like, let's say with all the chemicals. Yeah, we have like insane like, chemicals and. And like our palates are so, you know, whatever.

[C]

Now I'd bring that beer.

[A]

Beer or like in like a quesadilla from Taco Bell.

[B]

What year are we talking about?

[A]

Let's say 1500s. What are the Castle Times?

[B]

Beer was invented in like 2000 BC, I hate to tell you.

[A]

Okay, okay, let's just go to Castle Times and we bring them a quesadilla from Taco Bell.

[B]

Okay.

[A]

Surprise from McDonald's. Do their heads explode?

[B]

Yeah, I think so. That's Nick Schwartzen's joke. He's like, we've gotten so jaded with movies. We see the first Transformers. We're like, that sucked. He's like, can you imagine if you showed transformers in a 1950s theater? People be like, oh, start stabbing each other. Or the first people who saw a movie with the trains coming at them. Chris Fleming has that joke. He's like. He's like, there's a reason Timothy Chalamet has to play Willy Wonka now because Gene Wilder in 4K would be like the first train coming at people in that movie theater. That's a separate thing. There's a movie from the Show from the 90s, late 90s, early 2000s, that was short lived, I believe, called Do Over. It was basically about a kid, or, sorry, a suburban dad who gets sucked back into his high school years with. But like, with the mind of his future self. So he's got a talent show coming up that apparently he biffed when he was young. So he decides to play Good riddance time of your life by Green Day. And everybody's like, oh, this is the best thing ever. And then it comes time for the actual show and he does the moral thing and does the song that he wrote and he loses it, but that he did the right thing. Like, there's that. That video game coming out where it's like, what if like six dudes had assault rifles at Helm's Deep or something?

[A]

Oh, oh, yeah. The one where you have the car and you're running over all the, like.

[B]

Nights, like, could you win the battle of Hastings with like a sniper rifle?

[A]

I. Stuff like that.

[B]

No, no, I'm not asking you. I'm just saying, like, yeah, you could scare them, but I Would I feel as if it's got to be some, like, advanced cooking technique that would really blow people's mind. Like a quesadilla. I don't think people in the middle. The people in the middle ages would not know what, like a flat top grill is.

[A]

No, I'm just saying if they just bit into it, like, we're just. The flavor of it just be so insane with the chemicals and everything. Is this. Would it even be good?

[B]

Literally not been invented yet.

[C]

Yeah, candy. Candy would be so cool as well. And this is like the kind of thing where you're. You're skirting the rules a little bit. Where I could, like, take back a giant bag of gumballs and I would, like, hide them so that no one would know where I got them. But I would sell people these gumballs and they'd be like, how the fuck did you make this? And I'd be like, I'm not telling you, but you can have these gumballs for $10. And I would just, like, rob these people because they would have no idea. It's so funny too. Whenever I have this fantasy, which I have a lot of, like, you know, gumballs or wine, I never think to, like, bring back medicine and save people's lives. I'm always like, man, I bring back whiskey and Skittles.

[B]

Gumb.

[A]

Dude, if you lived in castle times and someone gave you whiskey and skittles, they would be your new God.

[B]

You would be queen of the manor.

[C]

I could have brought back.

[B]

It would give you all the donkeys.

[C]

Pure smallpox. But anyway, here's how you make beer. Skittles.

[A]

Oh, get some Wild Berry Skittles and some Jack Daniels. Hell yeah.

[B]

Mary could go back to the very dock where the first rats with bubonic plague stepped ashore, and she could know and see them scurrying into the city. And instead of telling them, kill those rats, she'd say, I have gumballs 10 bucks.

[C]

Wood Castle people like gumballs, 10 bucks a piece.

[B]

I don't know, like, would they want to be chewing?

[A]

Are we skipping too many, like, evolutions of food? Or would somebody bite into like a Doritos in the castle times? And would they just be like, what the.

[B]

Like, not, like, infected to the point where it wouldn't even make sense as food.

[A]

Yeah, it's just like, this doesn't. Yeah, they're all just eating, like, celery and cows or whatever, you know, I.

[C]

Have to make an important correction. I got the name of the Netflix show wrong.

[A]

What is it?

[C]

It's called Bon Appetit, your majesty.

[A]

Oh, because I looked up. That's much better.

[B]

I looked up Samurai Gourmet. I was like, this looks different.

[C]

Listen, I googled lady goes back in time Samurai food. And I did the first response and it was Samurai Gourmet. It is not right. It is Bon appetit. Your magic.

[A]

How did you find this in the first place?

[C]

I don't.

[A]

Alien Earth Autoplay after an episode I.

[C]

Thought it was Alien Earth episode five.

[B]

Yeah, Samurai Gourmet actually sounds kind of serious and good.

[C]

I don't think that that is what I recommended at all. I'm recommending Bon appetit, your majesty. A very stupid show about a girl who gets sucked back into time. But because she is like a world renowned chef, she keeps pleasing all of these evil tyrants with her cooking to save her life.

[A]

Now that does make me think, like, if tonight I. I got a little too drunk and I woke up in castle times, what would my play be? Because, like, I'm not. I'm not a gourmet chef. So like, what is the thing I.

[C]

And they're not going to be none of my videos. Your ability to like, platform.

[A]

Yeah, they don't give a. About my thoughts on shinobi. Oh, let me tell you the law.

[B]

Of Metal Gear Solid.

[A]

Yeah, you'd be. Can I do to keep people from killing me?

[C]

They would put your head on a spike within four minutes.

[A]

There's gotta be something I could show them. I gotta skip a rock across a lake or something.

[B]

Oh, that. Oh, that's a good one.

[A]

They figured that out or no?

[C]

Oh, have they figured that out?

[B]

I can sometimes do it.

[A]

Yeah, they didn't have that tech yet. I'll get Mike is. I don't know if the zoom is picking up. Mike is blowing into his face.

[C]

Brushing your teeth. They probably didn't know how to do that very well.

[A]

I can't bl. Let's say I show up terminating style and I'm just naked. All right. And I can't just like, I don't have toothpaste with me. So like, what can I show them? With my knowledge from 2025, if I just show up naked?

[C]

They have no concept of mental health. You could be a psychiatrist.

[A]

I teach them how to meditate. No, I think meditation goes back like you have.

[C]

You're the first person to meditate.

[A]

I don't think so. I think meditation predates castle times. Here's what you could do.

[B]

Pop them a few of your. Your Wellbutrin. And then in three weeks, they're gonna feel amazing. And they're.

[A]

No, no.

[B]

Pop up a few of your viants once a day, and then in three weeks they're gonna be.

[A]

No. It's Terminator style. I'm ass naked.

[C]

I got nothing with me naked.

[A]

What. What do I have to offer to castle people? What can I possibly teach them?

[C]

You don't have your volumes, Dan. I don't know why you keep asking us to solve your existential crisis that you.

[A]

Can I teach them something about eclipses? Can I teach them something about a phenomenon they don't understand that I can, like, be like, oh, we know this.

[B]

About eclipses right now.

[A]

That every once in a while, based on the axis and the rotation of the earth around the sun, that sometimes things get dark because the moon's in between the sun and the earth.

[C]

You're going to be burned like a witch. You're going to believe me, spell really good, and they're going to hang you outside the wall.

[A]

I need provable. I can't just explain an eclipse with my layperson's knowledge. Like, what can I bring to them?

[B]

Eclipses were first documented in 3340 BC in Ireland.

[A]

When did people start meditating also? That's kind of a hard thing.

[B]

Sure.

[A]

If you go back, it's a long time ago.

[C]

Oh, I got one. I got one.

[A]

What?

[C]

You know all modern music. You could just sing all of our modern tunes and people will be like, oh, my God, he's such a good, good bard.

[B]

Wait, what would Dan be like?

[A]

I'm just gonna sing Beatles songs to him.

[B]

Down to the paradise city.

[C]

Yeah, everyone will love it.

[B]

Like a monk version of every song he knows.

[C]

Everyone gather around. Do you remember?

[A]

He will be our new king.

[C]

Yeah. And they're like, this is amazing. This guy just keeps coming out with banger home tonight.

[A]

I don't want to let you go to. I mean, that may be the best option we have so far.

[C]

I'm trying to save your ass and this is all I ask.

[A]

There fucking has to be something better. I can't bring back penicillin.

[B]

Flip your eyelids inside out and then look at them and blink.

[A]

They'd kill me. They think I'm a demon.

[B]

Yeah, that's true. They think you're a demon for singing any of the songs we just mentioned, too.

[C]

Again, it has to be knowledge that you already have. So, like, this lady, she has, like, a really good modern view of cooking, which is really helpful.

[B]

Oh, make them a Mai Tai. But they wouldn't have. They wouldn't have Any, they wouldn't have orgeat. Learn to make it. They might have almonds.

[A]

Yeah. Or, yeah, I'm gonna make orgeat. I don't know how that works, Dan.

[B]

I could make or job.

[C]

He doesn't know how to infuse. Mike, this is my survival dance.

[A]

I know. It's almond adjacent. That's not gonna happen. Help.

[C]

He cut his first tomato, like, two weeks ago.

[A]

He's got really in. In living in 2025. I have nothing I could prove to people in the 1500s that would impress them.

[B]

Even just sleep with a gun. So if this happens, you have a gun.

[A]

No. It's Terminator rules.

[C]

I'm making up your ass.

[A]

It disappears out your ass. If you time travel, it's just Terminator.

[B]

Rules around popping pills up people's ass. They'll feel better about.

[C]

Terminator didn't have anything up his ass.

[A]

Beer bongs.

[B]

You can't now. Oh, you can start boof and drink. Show them how much quicker that is.

[A]

I'll be like, hey, you don't know Marilyn Monroe, but let me tell you a thing.

[C]

Let me.

[B]

Let's boof some mead.

[C]

You could invent suppositories.

[B]

I swear.

[A]

I'm actually trying to think of something right now. I don't think I have anything. You two. Do you guys have anything you could like.

[B]

You could. No, because they know how to start fire.

[A]

Yeah. What can we impress them with?

[B]

They're probably better starting fire than you are.

[C]

Maybe like modern fashion. I feel like their fashion is all outdated, and I'd be.

[A]

I don't think they would care. Right. They'd just be like, you're weird.

[B]

I think if we saw a future fashion from 800 years in the future, it's ugly.

[A]

Is there anything that. Like an injury or something that we would know? Like, oh, here's how you fix that up real quick.

[B]

Maneuver.

[C]

Peeing on someone who gets stung by a jellyfish.

[A]

Oh, yeah.

[B]

If you're coastal.

[A]

So specific. So I'm saying they are circling around you. You just time traveled into their field. They got their pitchforks out, and they're like, we're gonna kill this guy. You're like, wait, watch this. You can't just, like, summon a jellyfish and pee.

[B]

Let me see, let me see, let me see. When was Heimlich maneuver invented?

[C]

Well, she doesn't get to do that either. They. She has to be like, put me in a kitchen.

[B]

What were people doing before the seventies?

[A]

Dying.

[B]

Do that. You. Someone's chewing on some. Some cow cud. And you jam their.

[A]

That's such a specific thing. Like, you can't just manufacture that moment.

[C]

Makeup. I would be like, take me to your leader, and I'm gonna do the sickest cat eye on that.

[B]

Yeah, these are.

[C]

These are Speak on their.

[B]

These are good men and women from the middle Ages, Mary, we're talking about.

[C]

I'm just saying I think I could win them over with modern makeup techniques. I bet you they don't know anything about baking.

[B]

You could puke on command.

[A]

I think people back then could do it like, hey, guys.

[B]

Yeah, he's gonna. You could.

[A]

God. What the.

[C]

Wow them with how much cheese you can eat. I literally just gave three for me.

[B]

They were definitely. They were jacking off back then, for sure.

[A]

Oh, yeah.

[B]

Like, in. In every which way.

[C]

Could you imagine going back in time being like, did you guys not know that you could do this and just whip it out and start?

[A]

I bet everyone came to that naturally.

[B]

These guys stumble on this guy.

[C]

Figured out nobody knew how to do it.

[B]

They know how to do it this way.

[C]

You invent the Kama Sutra, or you're just like. But they don't know how to do it backwards. And.

[B]

Oh, you could show them some sex positions.

[A]

Yeah, I bet they were doing crazy.

[B]

Probably they had nothing better to do. It was dark all the time.

[A]

I don't think we have anything to offer.

[C]

It was dark.

[B]

I don't really. Yeah, really. I don't think you do.

[C]

Stop saying we. You don't have anything.

[A]

But, Mary, yours is all like, you got to be near a jellyfish and have to pee or something. Like, it's not. That's not something you could just do in the moment.

[C]

That's the argument. The bon appetit, your majesty. She's a cook, so she has to get herself in a kitchen. And once she's in the kitchen, she uses all their old timey materials, and she uses her modern mind to invent new techniques that they haven't heard of.

[A]

And yours is, like, makeup stuff.

[C]

She doesn't, like, land, actually, she does land with, like, a little pocket of gochujang. But, like, for the rest of the episodes, she's thinking of stuff she can make that they don't know. You could do it yet. But she has to use their kitchen. So I'd be like, you don't know how to do this milk?

[B]

Oh, I don't know. Figure it out if you're the one.

[A]

Do they have vinegar and baking soda? Can you make a vinegar and baking soda mountain?

[B]

Do they have mentos and Diet Coke.

[A]

They don't have Mentos or Diet Coke.

[B]

I don't think that's my favorite. Whoa, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait. Dan, we have not talked about the best Instagram Mike.

[A]

I do. Mike, you and I have the dumbest back and forth and Instagram dms.

[B]

Oh, I should have brought I for what's his name. I don't know how to.

[A]

The gulf between what you post on Instagram, Mike, and what you send me is just. It's just nothing but, like, wine stuff that you post.

[B]

Clearly.

[A]

And then you send me the dumbest. Dumbest.

[B]

But the stuff I sent to you, I'll find it. Where's the last time I talked to Dan?

[A]

You can't. I cannot believe. I can't think of. I legitimately can't think of something good I could teach them to make them think I was like, a prophet.

[B]

Oh, here he is. What's his name?

[C]

What is.

[B]

On Instagram.

[C]

You never DM me anything.

[B]

Oh, sorry. I'll send it to you right now.

[C]

Mike sends me dog memes a lot.

[B]

I do.

[A]

Yeah, I get some. This is my favorite.

[B]

No, no, me underscore n. He just. He sings like it's impossible.

[A]

You just need to watch it. It's impossible.

[B]

Like Korean pop songs. While he does, like, dumb with Mentos and Diet Coke and watermelons and.

[A]

All right. For the video listeners, Mike is holding up his phone. Here is a man that is.

[B]

Yeah, it's really good. No, no, man, that's.

[A]

You can tell it's great.

[B]

There's always this. He's really good. I don't know, like, if you don't have your phone or anything, I don't know what. Show them.

[C]

You guys are obviously going to die.

[B]

Thank you. Fine. I'd make them some sick medieval cocktails or something.

[C]

Thank you so much, Wes from Baltimore.

[B]

Oh, yeah. Thank you, Wes.

[A]

I have no skills. Three other times.

[C]

We know already.

[A]

Or some could argue this time.

[B]

Yeah. Hey, gang. The first time I played Ori in the Blind Forest, I thought the spirit shrines were bonus challenges, so I never bothered with them. Meaning I never had more than three shard slots. It took some doing, but I beat the whole game with just those three slots. When have you brute force your way through a game, playing it quote unquote wrong From Hillary in Virginia. P.S. i also never ate a tadpole in Baldur's Gate 3. I did that last one. I never ate a tadpole. I similar. We were talking about in like, they are billions tower dominion. I really dis and Civilization six and seven. I do not. I try my best not to restart, even if I know the tiles are not going to lead to a win. The early. The starting positions, that is kind of my way of brute forcing, but that's also kind of my way of like, just enjoying the game for what it is and not knowing that the run's not going to be ideal. Same with Balatro. I rarely wiped. I just wanted to see the run through until I died, see what happened. Even though I could tell pretty early on that it wasn't going to be a good one.

[A]

I think mine is probably just, you know, despite how much I love Metal Gear and everything, like, I just suck at stealth and like, I will very quickly abandon it. And just like through Delta, I was just like, shotgunning my way through a lot of it. You know, I did the wrong way.

[B]

I did the complete never alert any person in dishonored2run, which is one of the hardest things I've done in a game. I love stealth games. Like, I play. When possible, I play stealth. But like Dishonor two, no alerts was very tough. A lot of restarts, to be clear. But I also. Rob Hamler and I at Gamespot did the we call it Grave Hoppers Permadeath show, which was fun. I. And I forget. I went away on some vacation or work trip and then someone subbed for me and ruined my Resident Evil 4 playthrough. Forget I forgot who it was, but.

[C]

Could have been anyone.

[B]

For those who don't know, I still think that the idea is really good. I just wish we had done it more. But some. Somebody at Gamespot thought it was a bad idea above us, but Peter, was it Peter?

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Peter Brown's like, nix this right now.

[C]

Notorious Hater.

[A]

Yeah. Oh, man.

[B]

Oh, yeah. We applied Permadeath to every single game we're playing. So we started with. I forget what we started with the last of us. And then as soon on hardest difficulty and as soon as you die, you switch to the next game because it's Permadeath. So you could go through six games in one episode, or you could be playing one game like Resident Evil 4 for eight episodes until someone subs in for you and gets killed by the first chainsaw person.

[A]

Peter Brown. Yeah.

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

This was a very stressful experience for me personally, to jump into somebody else's game midway right when a chainsaw guy appears and they are just like, don't let Mike's character die. And I'm sorry that I couldn't figure it out, but I Got used to it.

[B]

The video is funny because you're like, oh, my God, he's gonna be pissed. I go see him. I forgot why you. What game you even jumped to. But, yeah, I'd say that's the most common one. I like inserting perma death into games where it technically doesn't exist. I do that. Jake and I did that in Breakpoint for a bit on the harder difficulty. That was fun.

[A]

Never died like a Mario or something. That'd be fun.

[C]

Make it harder. I accidentally made tunic very difficult. That game, you start with nothing. And I think eventually you get a stick so that you can hit certain enemies with. And you're just supposed to go to an area where you find a sword. And for whatever reason, I did not find this sword. And I thought that the game was challenging me to get through the first area with a stick. And you're not supposed to. There's an area where there's grass that you can't. I think there's bushes, and you can't get through them because you cannot slash a bush with a stick. You need the sword to get through these bushes. But what I learned was if enemies, if I get them to charge me and they slash, they could slash through the bushes. And so I got the enemies to slash the bushes, which got me into an area I should not have gotten to with just a stick. Sick. And I did an entire cave section with a boss with a stick. It took forever. It was so hard to kill this boss with a stick because it probably did, like, 0.1 damage. And I died all the time. And I had to keep coming back and be like, why do they make this game so hard? And then after I beat the boss and got back around to it, it. I saw the sword at the very entry level. So I did early game, like, you know, maybe a tenth of that game with the wrong weapon.

[A]

And that combat is not forgiving anyway, you know, even if you have the right weapon.

[C]

It was a bad start to that game for Mary, but it was my fault, I think. Yeah.

[B]

A common one. I think Tim Turi's done this. He was the one who first told me that, like, that was a fad or people doing it was the plasma cutter only dead space runs.

[A]

Oh, sure.

[C]

Because that game.

[B]

That game is one of the most, like, enjoyable, iconic weapons to use. So it wasn't, like, such a cool. Yeah.

[C]

Cut off their limbs.

[B]

Like our OG pistol in Residential four. Knife. Run. Knife. That's crazy.

[A]

I've watched him do that.

[B]

Yeah, that's because you have to do the bosses. Like, I could see doing that against the normal enemies, but the.

[A]

The boss Snake and all that. Yeah, yeah, that's cool.

[C]

It's different. What we're talking about is two different things, though, I think. There's one where you're like, whoops, played the game on hard difficulty, and there's another where you're challenging yourself. I think we could have a whole nother conversation about making the game more difficult because you want it to be. This one is like, oh, I made this way too hard on accident because I was not paying attention.

[B]

Yeah, for sure. All right, well, thank you, Hillary from Virginia. Dan, you want to read this last one from Matt from Indiana.

[A]

Yes. Dear Fire Escape cast, with the release of Snake Eater Delta, I was wondering if you'd explain to me why the song Snake Eater starts up when Snake is climbing the giant ladder. Why did Kojima decide they should sing a song about Snake's character? Nobody would break out in song while climbing a ladder in real life. Why doesn't Snake just say how he's feeling instead? It really takes me out of the game. Thanks, Mac Mania. Yeah, this is low tier trolling attempt here. This is. It doesn't even make sense, really. Snake. Matt is positing that Snake is singing Snake Eater as he's climbing the ladder. That's not the case. No. Just a song is playing during a scene in a video game. It's not a diegetic thing where it. If Big Boss had started singing that while he's climbing the ladder, I would have hated that. But it's just a song playing as the man. That's just. That's. That's cinema right there. Like that's. This is. Is. If you're gonna troll, do it better, Matt.

[B]

Yeah, but why did they play the song though?

[A]

Because it was cool. That happens all the time in movies. Movies all the time. Just play a song when it's cool because it just. It fits the scene or something like that. Or you can even do it diegetically where it's like, let's say, Wayne's World. They're all singing Bohemian Rhapsody in the car. That's great because in that scene it makes sense. They're all in the car, they're into the song, and they're singing along to the song.

[C]

They're not singing how they feel. They're singing lyrics to a song. It's that.

[A]

Yeah, drunk dudes. It's drunk dudes in a car singing along to a song they like. Yes, that makes perfect sense. Just the sheer act of a song playing or character singing does not make it stupid. It's characters just singing. What normal people would say is where it gets stupid. So, Matt, just try harder next time.

[B]

Leaving the troll aside, why do you. What impact does that song and the Long Ladder have? And why did they implement it right after the fire?

[A]

It's the end. The fight against the end as you go up to the.

[B]

After the end. Yeah, yeah, this. I'm sincerely not trolling him.

[A]

It's just some Kojima quirkiness right there. That's all it is.

[B]

If he's such a genius, though, this is a separate thing. I'm asking, if he's such a genius, why did he make the ladder so long?

[A]

Because it's funny that it's bigger than normal ladder.

[B]

Yeah, that's your best answer for that.

[A]

I like how big the ladder is. Everyone loves the ladder. What, are you gonna besmirch the ladder?

[B]

No, I like it a lot. I have a separate point on it, but.

[A]

Okay. No, no, no. It's a fantastic scene.

[B]

I'm actually asking you to dig deeper for once.

[A]

That's not really my forte.

[B]

Yeah, but you say it's the best story ever told in any medium, so I'm curious what you think.

[A]

I don't say. The latter is the linchpin of the story.

[B]

Yeah, but it's part of one of the best stories ever told.

[A]

It's a fun little moment.

[B]

Yeah, it's not little. It's long.

[C]

What if your skill is that when you go back in time, you can regale them with the entire Snake Eater story from.

[A]

They don't know Lyndon B. Johnson. That's pretty important.

[C]

They don't know you can just replace it with a different shogun or something.

[A]

King Edward or whoever was the guy back then.

[C]

Yes, but this is like feudal Japan, so it's Edward.

[A]

I don't think they like. I don't think they like or care about Metal Gear Stories. No. I think they would just think I was stupid and kill me.

[C]

You should just die. I'm trying to throw you a bone here. I'm. What I'm saying is, is like, we have modern stories, we have modern music. We probably know some modern art. Like, I'm sure there's something you can do with that that would save you.

[A]

I can't paint, so I can't just like, oh, here's Starry Night. You know what?

[C]

If you could, like, you'd be like, listen, I'm gonna tell you guys. And you just. You just literally, like, explain MacGruber from beginning to end.

[A]

That's absolutely not. That would mean nothing. That relies so heavily on knowledge of what it's satirizing and all that stuff. There's no. They would kill me 10 seconds into that explanation.

[B]

I really agree with Dan. Dan, I don't think you have any actual skills.

[A]

I mean, I have skills that can apply in 2025.

[B]

Like what?

[A]

But you go even 30 years back, let's say 50, let's say the 70s.

[B]

If the world.

[A]

I'm just useless.

[B]

If. If the post apocalypse started, you would be.

[A]

If video games in just that type of pop culture, I'd be selling gumballs.

[C]

For a dollar and you guys would.

[B]

Be dead fell and you had to survive.

[A]

Oh, so that's the. The other way around. Instead of going back further, it's just like, oh, post apocalypse. Yeah, I got nothing. I have absolutely nothing. No knowledge, no uses at all.

[B]

No, I think it'd be fine for like a few weeks.

[A]

I think that's where, you know, when Mary brought up the like, meditation stuff, the mental health stuff, I think I could have some insight there because, you know, we'd all be going through a rough time. I think I could maybe help some people with that, but I'm not a. Not a doctor. I think there'd be enough doctors that could do better. Help. Help.

[C]

But back then like a lot of the doctors were like, use leeches. Like, I'm sure you have like more modern knowledge that would help you.

[A]

I mean like, I can explain meditation and stuff like that, but like, yeah.

[C]

Fake it till you make it.

[A]

I'd be a good snake oil guy. If we go back to like Red Dead times, I'd be a great snake oil guy. What would you sell snake oil.

[B]

That'd be sick. Be the OG Snake oil salesman.

[A]

Yeah. Yeah. Hey, you heard about the snake oil. Check it out. Cure what ails you.

[B]

Go back in time. Show Kojima this real tall ladder. Be like, you have no idea.

[C]

This is cinema.

[B]

I don't know. Yeah, I think I would. I could cook. I could. Not as well as this woman, it sounds like from the show, but I could. Could make a. Make some sort of medieval cocktail from mead and, and whip up some simple.

[A]

You two are in better shape than me. Is there some exercise things? Some like, like, oh, here's a better way to do a push up or a deadlift or something. You could maybe teach them and, and they'd be impressed by.

[C]

I don't know if push ups are gonna save you because they'd be like.

[A]

Oh, she's onto something here.

[C]

They're very fit back then. Like, they weren't worried about. I don't think so.

[B]

I think they're. I think they were. When are we talking? Where are we talking? We're talking Middle Ages in Europe or.

[A]

Like, whenever the castles were.

[B]

Yeah, so they were. They would have been, I think, 1500.

[A]

I don't know.

[B]

They wouldn't have been, like, shredded. They would have been, like, farmer fit.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

So in shape. But because they. They can't. They can't binge on food.

[C]

What I'm saying is, is, like, they don't need help with, like, exercise regimens. They're. They're. They're.

[B]

Yeah. They're exercising just to survive.

[C]

Correct.

[B]

Well, the castle people maybe might have been fat. Like, they might have been.

[A]

When I say castle people, I mean people that lived in castle times. So, like, that includes the farm workers and stuff.

[C]

Huh?

[B]

I don't know.

[A]

Not like the nobility, you know.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

There's kind of some good lift you could teach him or something.

[B]

I got shown how to go from flaccid to erect and back in, like, three seconds. Did.

[A]

Did they have obs? I could teach them some things there.

[B]

What would you teach them about?

[A]

Obs, filters, and, you know, studio mode.

[C]

Born to die.

[B]

Oh, my God. I thought. I thought you were saying IBS in my head.

[A]

No, that's irritable bells.

[B]

I was like, there are filters for irritable bowel syndrome.

[A]

Oh, I don't know that yet.

[C]

I can't think of anything, Dan. Like, you're so toast.

[B]

You might be dead, but you, too.

[A]

You don't have anything good for you. You had the makeup thing.

[C]

I have hair and makeup techniques. I would. I would regale them with tales of all of the songs that I know.

[B]

I've got one. I've got one. I think I've got one. They were really into court jesters. They appreciated comedy. You start rattling off a few, like, jokes from some renowned comics from our time, like George Carlin.

[A]

So much of that.

[B]

No, you go back to Middle Ages in Russia, and you're rattling off the jokes Norm was telling with all these. These Dostoevskis and Fedoroviches.

[A]

Sensibilities would be so different.

[B]

I think Norm's sensibilities are pretty old school when you really dig into them.

[A]

Old school in, like, 1500. But I think you'd be.

[C]

He would get killed if he, like, said things against religion. Like, that's all they had back then.

[A]

God, are we just using.

[C]

But if You. If you sung Shake it Off, would that not appeal to them?

[A]

But without all the instrumentation and the better singers and stuff like that, like me singing Shake it Off is not gonna do it right.

[B]

No, with.

[A]

No.

[C]

Do it now.

[A]

Yeah, I just shake it off. You gotta shake it off, right, fellas, don't stab me with your swords.

[B]

Shake off that. You see this naked Terminator man with a beard?

[C]

I think it's a stretch to call any of us Terminator man. That's just a nudie skinny boy.

[A]

I would tell them where all the hidden one ups are in Mario.

[B]

I would just kill them all first.

[A]

Oh, that's okay. I. I can't believe that we don't have good answers for this.

[C]

I know.

[B]

There probably is.

[C]

I can. I can make a mean discord.

[B]

Yeah. People write in, tell us how we would survive. Impress them with our neighbor.

[C]

I would invent cheese, I think.

[B]

No, they're eating cheese.

[A]

Would you be able to produce it? You could show them, like, walk them to a cow, and then like, you know, a couple hours later have cheese.

[C]

I could figure it out. I think now that I know it's possible. I could figure it out. Not like cheddar, though. I would figure it out.

[A]

Tell them how many amiibos I have.

[B]

Call up your friends at Udapils. Tell them you have a partnership with them.

[A]

That's right. Yeah. Come to Minnesota, Castle people.

[B]

Tell them about all the benefits of Dell Alienware's summer gaming events.

[C]

30 off factor now.

[A]

God.

[B]

Give them a giant bomb free subscription for a month.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Watch us play games. This is my friend Mike.

[A]

But now he's playing Saturn games now. Yeah. There's just nothing.

[B]

We'll figure it out. People write into us.

[A]

All of us.

[B]

I think I'll. I'll figure something out. I. I'm sure they'd be into wine stuff. I could regale them there.

[C]

I mean, I would invent a new candy, but you don't know how to make candy.

[A]

If I put a gun to your head right now and I said, make me some candy, how would you do in 2025?

[C]

Sugar water, boil that, add color.

[B]

That's just simple syrup with color.

[A]

That's what candy is.

[C]

Caramel.

[A]

Huh?

[B]

I think they had stuff like that. Well, thank you, Matt from Indiana. That's our show again. You can rent a firescapecastgmail.com, please. If you have any ways for Dan to survive in castle times. Write in for any of us, I guess. Write in how each of us would survive in this situation if we just appear Naked in a castle in the middle Ages and we don't have any of our trusty gadgets or.

[A]

The key thing is too it has to be based on our actual personal knowledge. It can't just be knowledge from 2025. It has to be like.

[B]

That's what I'm saying.

[A]

Something Mike would know now. Something I would know now.

[B]

Our interests tell us how each of us would survive or the stuff each of us are capable of maybe researching a bit farther to be prepared for when such an event happens. I think. I think. I think we'll get there. Well, thank you, Matt.

[A]

Teach me how to do a cannonball into a lake or something.

[C]

You gotta hope there's a lake nearby. And also I'm pretty sure that they know how to like put themselves into little body balls and jump.

[A]

Have you seen a painting of a castle person doing a cannonball? I just outside of actual cannonballs.

[C]

They've all been painted.

[B]

Brigal the Elder did a lot of cannonball paintings. Couple of housekeeping things. We have restock on our stainless steel water bottle on fourth wall.com that ran out. So if you're interested in getting that for. I don't know if you want to just like make sure you're hydrated at work. Maybe going for some runs.

[A]

Questions. If I said E equals MC squared and I said energy equals mass times content to the square.

[B]

You don't know.

[A]

I don't know what the C is. Okay, but if I gave. If I just said E equals MC squared, would that like cause all the wizards to have an aha moment, be like he's a genius?

[B]

No.

[C]

No.

[B]

Because they say we don't even know what it means.

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

Energy equals mass C squared.

[B]

I think you that that's your best bet.

[C]

Try that run with that.

[B]

Our stainless steel water bottle, the white one, the 17 ounce is back in stock on fourth wall dot com. We also Dan and Mary. I hope you don't mind me. I don't think this is premature to say. We do have some new merch on the way. We will announce it maybe by next episode. Next couple episodes. We got a new fire escape kind of let's say fall 2025 design coming out. We will update people when that is on fourth wall and live for people to purchase.

[A]

So C is the speed of light. Where's the C playing there. There's no C. Is that real?

[B]

Sorry, what?

[A]

The C in E equals MC squared is the speed of light. I googled it.

[B]

I thought the whole equation was the speed of light.

[A]

No, C is the speed of light. There's no C in that. Equals energy, equals mass.

[B]

Speed of light two squared times itself. Yeah, I don't know.

[C]

You're just not meant to be a philosopher.

[B]

Theory of relativity.

[A]

Okay, Sorry, go ahead.

[C]

An object in motion stays in motion.

[B]

Unless acted on by an outside motion.

[C]

Oh, yeah, you get that thing with the balls that bounce.

[A]

I'd have to make it.

[B]

Get a bunch of their helmets. The knights. I'm assuming they're knights.

[A]

This is tough.

[B]

Like I said, merch at Firescape. Merch. Firescape. Cast firescapemerch.com@fourth wall. Or just go to our Patreon, look for the links there. We will put a post up when the new stuff is up, but our stainless steel water bottle is good to go if you're interested. Also, do I have anything else? Is that it? We'll start. We'll start letting people know about Game of the Year timing. We're getting sort of to that point where we're going to start giving hard dates in the next few episodes so people can know.

[A]

We did need to be booked. Yes, we did.

[B]

Mid November last year. We. It was fun. We got ahead of everybody and that was also a convenient time for us. But we're aiming for later, aiming for the December timing. But we'll see.

[A]

I mean, I would prefer December or even January if we had to. But like, we are looking at December stuff. But obviously I gotta, you know, figure out we're doing Giant Bomb and stuff. So to be determined with some of this stuff. But we will be doing this in person near the end of the year.

[B]

Yes. Looking forward to it. Dan, what do you have going on in the meantime?

[A]

Giantbomb.com we're killing it over there. Mike Minati is playing the new season of Blake Club. He is playing virtual Hydlide for the Saturn. It looks like hot horseshit to me. He actually likes it. But yeah, check out johnbomb.com, bombcast voice won't dump truck all the stuff we're doing over there.

[B]

Mary, what about you?

[C]

Streaming on Mondays. Come check me out on my Twitch channel. I play a lot of the games that we talk about here first.

[A]

Cool.

[B]

We will be back in a couple weeks with episode 116. Thank you so much for joining us. Until then, have a good time. We'll see you then. Write in. Help us Survive Castle times. We'd appreciate it. Each. Each of us, we need. We need help.

[C]

Until then, to live.

[B]

Bye, everyone.

[A]

Bye. Bye.

[C]

I think you could, like, show them new words.

[A]

What would I have.

[C]

They just.

[A]

I have a good vocabulary.

[C]

They don't know what Riz is. You know what I mean? Like, I don't want to.

[A]

Not slang. No, no, not slang stuff. I'm sure there's more applicable, like, modern words, but, like, I don't know. They would just say I'm just gibberish.

[B]

Yeah, I think just the way we are talking right now would be gibberish to them that we're not using thy and ye old Winst.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Yield.

[C]

I feel like you could add Riz into winst, Mary.

[B]

They're not gonna like you from the get go.

[A]

Yes, true. I don't say Riz now.

[B]

I mean, I'm an ally now.

[A]

Wow. Oh, Mr. Elizabeth Banks is ugly.

[C]

Yeah. Shut the up, Mart.

[B]

Are we recording still?

[A]

I think we're done now. All right, we gotta go.

[B]

See you next episode.

[A]

Sa.