A (0:00)

I can tell you that I have failed more than I've succeeded. And in fact, most people fail a lot before they ever are successful. I failed well over 100 times before ever seeing success. So here I'm going to be talking about four surprising traits are going to help you succeed in whatever you are trying to do in your life, regardless of what's happened before or where you're at right now. So the first one is not having big enough goals. And I understand who this is because I remember one time I was sitting in a class and they asked us to write down our goals. And I remember writing down $2 million, right? That's for the year. And I had never made $2 million before. I had no idea how I was going to do it. And so I wrote down 2 million. I was so excited. And I looked at everybody around me and they had like 250,000 or 100,000 or like 300,000. I remember getting ready to erase my goal because I thought it just seemed like way too big compared to what everybody else was doing. And so I started to erase it and. And then I was like, I'm not gonna erase it. I'm actually gonna just see if I can do it. Like, I wanna have bigger dreams. So I think that one of the biggest mistakes that we make is not having big enough dreams. And we let, like, the negative voice, right, the, the, the amygdala, the bad wolf in our brains, keep us from being the hero that we need to be that can actually have anything and everything that they want. So what I wanna encourage you to do is don't let, like, that voice, that limiting belief that that person inside of you that says, I can't do that. It's too big. You've got to have big dreams. And not only do you need to have big dreams, but you need to, like, be really super specific and pinpoint exactly what it is that you're going towards. Because if you don't know exactly what you want and those dreams aren't super crazy and expiring and fun to you, you're never going to be able to hit the mark. You need to, number one, have big dreams, big goals, and be very super specific about what they are. So let's relate this to you. Like, think about how many times maybe when you've gotten excited about something, you had these big dreams and these big goals, and all of a sudden something or someone, possibly yourself, put a kibosh to it, right? And they were like, they were like, no. You were like, no, it can't happen. It's too big. Stop that. Stop that. You can do anything that you want in life. If somebody else has done it, you can do it too. So, number one, have big goals. All right? The second thing is it's positive self talk. You're like Cristy, you talk about this all the time. You're always talking about, you know, train your brain, stop, snap and switch, thrive. You get what you think. But here's the thing I have to tell you. There's nothing more important than that. Like, your thoughts become things and what you think about becomes energy. Feels where focus flows. So if you're not thinking about like good things and you're self sabotaging, it's never going to work for you. I remember when I wanted to like, apply, like do this challenge that where I was going to be competing with really successful people like Brendan Burchard and Russell Brunson, all these people, Lewis Howes, that had millions of followers and they were like these big important names and I felt really small compared to them. So my dream and my goal was to be able to win this challenge so I can show up and an event with Tony Robbins, my idol and Dean Graziasi and the other people. Now that was a really big goal that I almost didn't do because I let my, my limiting beliefs, my self sabotage get in the way. But I did it and I actually, because I had the big goal, I actually achieved the goal. Now here's the thing. I almost talked myself right out of it by saying things like, this is never going to happen for you. Krista, why do you think you can compete with Russell? They have millions of followers. You're never going to be able to do it. You AKA you aren't good enough. That was not conducive to me succeeding. So I had to stop, snap and switch my way out of that, that thinking. And in fact, it took me like a couple of weeks to actually believe what it was I was trying to tell myself. Right? So sometimes things that seem kind of far out of reach, it just takes a little bit more time for you to believe it. So the idea here is have big dreams and have big goals. Associate your thinking, thinking and your thoughts that align with those big goals and kind of like fake it until you make it. Like just like pretend until it actually happens. That's what I've done. Okay, so let me give you an example. So, like, the kind of people that I really want to help are number one kind of people. Like I was six or seven years Ago, right? Middle aged woman, raised her family, making everybody else successful, working for everybody else, knowing I had so much potential, like maybe some of you do right now, but being afraid to do anything with it. Right? Being afraid to kind of go outside of my comfort zone. So the. The thoughts in my head were, you can't do it. You're already successful. Why would you try? And that just kept me being more miserable and more stuck. How often are you doing that to yourself? Like, how often are you kind of like talking yourself out of things? Because you're. Your thoughts, your self talk is self sabotaging you. Even though you, like, have these big goals and big dreams, but you're letting that self talk keep you from kind of what you want. Like, I understand. I did the same thing. I remember when I wanted to compete in this. This competition where I was going to get to meet Tony Robbins and just, you know, like, the reason I wanted to meet him, it wasn't because I have this, like, idolization from him, but I felt like he was what I needed to be able to help me get through and my eating disorder. In fact, I remember my husband. Oh, I can cry thinking about. But he. He said to me, babe, maybe you're supposed to do this competition because you. Tony's gonna help you. He's gonna help you with your eating disorder. And so that was the reason I wanted to. To win this challenge. I was like, I've tried everything. Nothing's worked. He's gonna be able to help me. So I. I had this big goal of winning, but I was coming up against these thoughts of, you're going up against Russell Brunson and Brendan Burchard and all these, you know, influencers that have all these huge lists. And so I was like, sabotaging. So I had to completely recognize that and completely. Ladies, it was like this tug of war. I was like, you can't. You're so stupid. Why are you doing this? Like, this tug of war for, like, weeks of me thinking, why are you doing this? You're never going to win. Until I just kept fighting with myself, fighting with the thoughts, training my brain. And like, until finally I was like, you're fricking doing this, right? And I just went for it. So how are you doing that? Like, what kind of thoughts you have these big goals? How are the thoughts keeping or. Or not keeping you from getting them? And even if you have to be like me, where you don't believe yourself, you got to keep fighting that wolf and practicing until you actually do you want to Know what? Like, I actually did win. I, in fact, I won number two the first year. In fact, two grown boys had to team up the last eight hours to beat me. Like, suck it, man. Anyways. And then I want to get in the second year. I was number three, right? So I, I just fought that limiting belief. I went through it and it almost seems, like, impossible. It almost seems impossible that I, that I won. I was the complete underdog, but because I had big dreams and then align my thoughts and my actions towards it, it happened. I promise you it can happen for you too. So don't take anything off the table. Anything can happen if you just align yourself. Okay, third thing, what do you think it is? It's. You gotta actually do something. Like, people always say that knowledge is power. Let me just say something, ladies. Knowledge isn't power. You want to know its power? It's like implementation. Like, I, you have to actually do the work. I mean, there's all these things, like visualization. I believe in visualization, you know, thoughts. I believe in the thoughts. But if you sit there on the couch watching Netflix, it's not going to happen. So you actually have to align your actions toward it. So if I can relate this to, to, to two other situations. One, when I wanted to leave my career and I was afraid, I had to just do it. Scared, poopless. You have to think about this. Like, what do you need to do? You, you have these big goals. If you align your thoughts to the goals now you've got to align the actions. Like, what does that action mean? Maybe the first thing is, is like you just visualizing what it looks like. You writing it down. Maybe it starts with that. It starts with you just writing down what you want, right? I'm not saying to go quit your job. I'm not saying to go do like get out a credit card, to go hire a coach. I'm saying maybe the first step is you just writing it down, right? What I find is like, when I write things down, you know, like I visualize things, I write them down. My brain is more primed to like, believe it and start taking action. Your first action might just be writing it down. That's how you can start, right? And then once you start doing that, your brain is gonna say, okay, this sounds pretty good. What else can I do? What actions can I do to align with my goal, with the thoughts around that goal? What actions can I take now to actually move me towards there? And now you've got to take action. So let me show you how this relates to you and how this success filtering question might help you. So the British road team, they wanted to win Olympic gold. They hadn't won Olympic gold for years and years and years. So what they did was they had one success filtering question. The question was, will it make the boat go faster? And every decision that they decided to do was, was, yes, they would do it if it made the boat go faster, or no, they wouldn't if it didn't. Example. I want to eat a box of donuts today. You guys always talk about donuts. I think that shows you when I was eating bad, I ate a lot of donuts. So they always have the donut example. So sorry about that. So will eating donuts make the boat go faster? The answer is no. Will tossing in a salad, eating chicken make the mocha faster? Yes. So they would eat chicken instead of donuts. I don't feel like working out today. I'm. I'm totally tired. Is if I work out, is it going to make the boat go faster? Yes. If I don't, will it make the moat go faster? No. So they would work out. So let's put this in relation to you. Let's just say you've got these crazy goals. You want to start doing something different on Sundays. If you're sitting there watching Netflix, drinking a bottle of wine, eating all the popcorn, is that going to get you closer to your goal? The answer is no. So don't do it. Do something else that aligns you closer to your goal. What. What about maybe you're not feeling as happy today, so you're sitting there feeling miserable, feeling sorry for yourself. You know what I love to do? I love to turn on happy music. I like to blare the music. I like to play the music gets me in a happier state. So you can either sit there in your sorrow, or you can change what you're doing. Is it going to make the boat go faster sitting there being sorrowful, or is it going to make the moat go faster if you go outside and take a walk? If you turn the music on and start dancing, there's your answer. So the fourth thing to do that's to help you have more success in every area of your life is fail forward. Right? You're going to have to make mistakes, and that's okay. I mean, nothing that's great in life happens by you hitting it out of the ballpark every single time. I want you to think about this in relation to your kids, right? When your child. Or maybe you don't have children yet maybe you're, you know, you're in college and that. And that's fine. Do you pass every test? Do you get A's every time? No. I mean, then you retake the test, right? If you've got a child and the child's learning to walk and they. They're going from crawling to walking, as soon as they fall, do you tell them, hey, maybe you're just going to be stuck at crawling. Don't try anymore. No. As a parent, as a mother, you encourage them, you inspire them. They take one or two steps and you're like, yay, good job. They fall. And you don't say, you suck for falling. You say, great job for making one or two steps. Going to fail. That's okay. Fail forward. And this is kind of off topic, but I'm going to say it anyways. I hear this all the time, and I don't really understand it, but people will say, I'm afraid of success. I have fear. I have fear of success. What the is that? Like, why are you afraid of success? You got to be successful first before you can be afraid of success. Right. We'll worry about that when you get there. Don't be afraid of the what ifs. Be afraid of the what ifs if you stay exactly where you're at right now. So let's just read it really quickly. The four steps. Number one is having really big goals. Have big goals. Go out there, like, put it on your dream board. Go for it. Number two, you've got to have your thoughts aligned with those goals. You've got to train your brain, train your thought process, train what you're saying to yourself to align with those big goals and throw away the negative nellies, throw away the bad wolf. Number three is you've got to actually take action. You've got to do the thing. You can't just sit there eating bonbons and sitting there watching TV and expect to be different. You've got to actually, like, take action. Action takers are money makers. Money loves speed. You got to do it now. Do it now. Do it now. Remember we talked previously on the channel about. About W. Clement Stone, a billionaire back in the 1920s. He would say, do it now because, you know, money, wealth, success has a need for speed. You need to take action. And then lastly, you got to know you're going to fail. And that's okay. It's okay to fail. It's not even failing. It's learning. You are learning what doesn't work. Now, as long as you're failing and you're learning from it and you're adjusting, you're adapting, you're modifying. It's going to be okay. So those are the things. And who cares if you mess up? I know we get embarrassed and over worried. I know we want to please everybody. I know it's like who cares? We're going to fail. And it's not a failure. It's just a learning experience of what didn't work. So those four things I promise you, implement those, work on them, practice them can be like a massive game changer in your success. And I want to hear like what are you practicing? Like tell me down below, what are you practicing? What's working? What do you need help with? Ask the community, ask for help. Say what's working for you so you can support other people. And as always, thank you for watching. I appreciate you so much and I'll see you next time. Hey there. If you want to learn how to dominate your market as a real estate agent, how to sell more listings and stand out as the Go to obvious choice, sign up for my virtual event. Just go to kristamayshore.com forward/lesslesslistings. Do me a favor. This is a three day virtual event. I'm going to teach you how to stand out in your marketplace. Go to kristamayshore.com forward/lessless listings and I will see you there.