Parasocial Listener II - Flightless Bird

Transcript

David Farrier (0:00)

Just quickly, before this week's episode kicks off, Flightless Bird has been nominated for a Webby Award. The Webbies are kind of a big deal for us and we'd love you to vote. If you like our show and you have a moment, this is a really key way you can help us. Here's what you do. Go to webbyawards.com that's W E B B yawards.com, click the go vote button, hit search and type in Flightless Bird. Click on Flightless Bird when it turns up and and go and vote. Also, if you're on our Instagram Lightless Bird pod, there's a link in our bio as well. Thanks for listening to this very self involved monologue onto the show. Hello there, Dave. Hi, my little. Oh God, I haven't thought of one. My little titmouse, how are you doing? You have one job in this phone conversation. I carry you through the entire rest of it. All you have to do is think of a baked good. My little warm loaf of fresh baked bread. My little little cornhole little donut. That's delicious. I love that cornhole. What's a cornhole? Mousetrap. Mousetrap would be a good New Zealand one. Hot pocket. That's very American. My little hot pocket. My little steamy hot pocket. What about lamington? Do you guys have that? Hey, don't flip the premise of this podcast on me. Well, let me tell you about lamingtons, guys. I'm David Farrier, a New Zealander accidentally marooned in America, and I want to figure out what makes this country tick. Do you know what a lamington is?

Nick (1:34)

Nope.

David Farrier (1:35)

If you come to New Zealand one day, you'll find out. Now, at the end of last year, we did an episode called the Parasocial Listener, which was all about Nick, a flightless bird listener who wrote in with a pretty intense story. Nick had been diagnosed with a rare kind of brain tumour. Rare in that you can remove it, but it keeps coming back. Nick has had multiple surgeries, each one seeing part of his brain removed, which has had some pretty interesting side effects. As new parts of his brain take on the extra load, his emotions are way closer to the surface. For one thing, he feels more in a way. And yet, conversely, the parts of him that used to be scared are less prominent. Not in a therapy speak kind of way, but in that his brain doesn't process fear like it used to. He's less scared of things. That was one of my favourite episodes of this podcast. And towards the end, you may Recall that Nick was finally going to take his dream trip to the best place in the world, New Zealand. So of course, we had to catch up with him and see how that trip went. So prepare to pack your bags and go to New Zealand, because this is the parasocial listener, part 2 episode. Fly this flightless,

Rob (2:52)

flightless bird Touchdown in America. I'm a flightless bird Touchdown in America.

Summary

Flightless Bird: Parasocial Listener II (April 7, 2026)
Host: David Farrier | Cohost: Rob
Guest: Nick

Episode Overview

In this episode of Flightless Bird, David Farrier continues the deeply personal story of Nick, a listener with a rare and aggressive brain tumor. The episode revisits Nick’s previous appearance (“Parasocial Listener”) and follows up on a promised trip: Nick’s dream journey to New Zealand. Through Nick’s experiences—ranging from accidentally dangerous to profoundly uplifting—the team explores not only what makes New Zealand unique, but also themes of fear, trust, living in the moment, and the incredible bonds formed between strangers. The story is rich with humor, wisdom, and a remarkable sense of gratitude.

Key Discussion Points & Insights

Revisiting Nick and His Diagnosis

Background (10:00–11:04):
Nick was previously diagnosed with a rare malignant brain tumor, called an “anaplastic pleomorphic xanthoastrocytoma (APXA).”
Nick (10:18): “It took almost three months to get a diagnosis...[this type of tumor], there’s less than one case per year.”
Aggressiveness and Outlook:
The tumor is terminal, grows back, and demands major changes to Nick’s life and outlook.

Nick’s New Zealand Dream

The Friendship Paddle (11:04–11:29):
Nick was supported by his surfing community, raising funds so he could travel to New Zealand—a lifelong dream for surfing, sightseeing, and meat pies.
Nick (11:29): “So I booked a flight. I was like, screw it, I’m going to do it now.”
Inspiration:
Nick attributes some of his motivation to Farrier’s storytelling:
Nick (11:41): “It kind of was like it was a subconscious thing listening to you.”

Visa Mishaps and Struggles to Get to New Zealand

Near-Miss at the Airport (12:45–14:51):
Nick nearly misses his flight due to not knowing about an essential New Zealand visa (NZeTA), accidentally attempts it through a scam website, and is ultimately saved by a calm and helpful New Zealand immigration officer.
Nick (14:33): “Luckily got there super early … I felt stupid. I’ve never had to do that anywhere else I’ve traveled.”
Celebratory Movie:
On the plane, he watches The Fellowship of the Ring to get into a New Zealand state of mind.

Immediate Community and Kiwi Hospitality

Warm Welcome and Paragliding (15:19–21:19):
Immediately after landing, Nick is embraced by Graham (a Flightless Bird listener) and others who take him straight from the airport to paragliding on the coast.
Nick (16:06): “Here’s my friend Joe. He’s a tandem pilot for paragliding. You’re going to strap in with him and jump off a cliff.”
Nick (19:54): “Just like full trust, like, right off the bat... And I fell running, and then we just get shot up into the air. And it was incredible.”
Surfing and Adventure:
Nick experiences real New Zealand surf conditions—more challenging than back home—and even when humbled and tumbled by waves, finds the experience exhilarating.
Nick (21:49): “I got my ass kicked. That was hard. So I’ll be honest. … Tumbled and humbled. That’s what I got.”

Everyday Differences and Observations

Cafe Life and Tipping (12:10):
Nick notes subtle differences in daily life, like no tipping at cafes and trusting systems (paying for gas after pumping).
Camping:
Nick enjoys freedom camping:
Nick (31:23): “The campsites are nice. ... It’s cool.”

The Scary Cave Incident

Unexpected Peril (24:00–31:23):
Nick unwittingly finds himself in a potentially dangerous situation: following new acquaintances (including a man with a machete) to a remote cave.
Nick (voice memo, 24:00–30:30):
- Describes increasing unease as the group leads him deeper into isolation and tries to take his phone/keys.
- Diffuses the situation by drawing attention to his brain surgery and medical bracelet, triggering unexpected empathy from the group.
- Nick (voice memo, 29:57): “He starts looking like he's gonna cry ... [and says] my brother had a brain tumor ... He just looks like he's about to cry. He goes, yeah, let’s take you back, dude.”
Reflection (35:13–38:12):
Nick processes the event philosophically, noting a deep mutual understanding between people simply trying to survive and feel alive.
Nick (voice memo, 35:13): “We both saw somebody who was trying to survive ... Surviving isn’t just staying alive. Surviving is finding new opportunities, new ways to experience exciting things and feeling alive. ... I sure as hell felt alive. And maybe that’s the whole point.”

Travel as Healing and Escape

Relief and Renewal (32:15–33:27):
Nick finds healing in being away from constant reminders of illness; the trip lets him “forget stuff” and “feel normal again.”
Nick (32:15): “...it’s felt like I feel normal again here. Like I’m just a guy traveling on my own ... I don’t have to worry about, like, the health crap and all that. It just feels like I’m a normal person.”
- On appreciating time: “...my time, like, being able to choose how I can spend my time … that's a gift.”

News Just Before Departure

Tumor Growth (33:27–35:13):
Right before leaving for New Zealand, Nick learns his tumor is growing again, but he uses the mantra:
Nick (34:04, via text): “If I’m not out there experiencing a fulfilling life, then what’s the point of trying to extend that life in the first place? ... If not now, then when?”

Listener Responses & Food Truck Corrections

Food Truck Debate (46:30–47:59):
Continuing running joke about Farrier’s claim that NZ has no food trucks—listeners correct him.
- Listener Lucky: “While we definitely don’t have the food truck culture of LA, there is more than just one food truck in Auckland. You could have talked about the White Lady, which is an institution.”
- [47:59] Discussion of different regional food truck cultures in the US (NY, Austin, Houston, Columbus).

Notable & Memorable Quotes

David Farrier (01:35):
“If you come to New Zealand one day, you’ll find out [what a lamington is]. Now, at the end of last year, we did an episode called the Parasocial Listener, which was all about Nick, a flightless bird listener who wrote in with a pretty intense story.”
Nick (14:33):
“I felt stupid. I felt like I should have known that I needed to get a visa and apply for one. I’ve never had to do that anywhere else I’ve traveled.”
Nick (16:06):
“You’re gonna strap in with him and jump off a cliff.”
Nick (voice memo, 24:00):
“Holy shit. Wow. I don’t know what just happened, but I am, I’m alive. That’s a start.”
Nick (32:15):
“It’s felt like I feel normal again here. ... It just feels like I’m a normal person.”
Nick (voice memo, 35:13):
“Surviving isn’t just staying alive. Surviving is finding new opportunities, new ways to experience exciting things and feeling alive. … I sure as hell felt alive. And maybe that’s the whole point.”
David Farrier (30:50):
“Imagine if Nick had gone to New Zealand because of this podcast and been macheted in a cave in some weird kind of twist.”

Timelines & Timestamps of Key Segments

| Timestamp | Segment/Event | |------------|----------------------------------------------------------| | 10:00 | Nick recounts rare tumor diagnosis | | 14:33 | Visa drama at LAX, nearly missing his flight | | 15:19 | Listener Graham greets Nick; paragliding adventure | | 19:54 | Nick describes the paragliding experience | | 21:49 | Surfing with Kiwis, humbled by “real” NZ surf | | 24:00 | “The Cave Incident” – Nick’s harrowing storytelling | | 31:23 | Nick describes how safe and welcomed he feels otherwise | | 32:15 | Nick discusses psychological healing and feeling ‘normal’| | 35:13 | Profound reflection on the cave and shared survival | | 45:25 | Nick’s gifts for Dave (band T-shirt, cassette tape) | | 46:30 | Listener corrections on NZ food trucks |

Tone & Original Language

The episode retains the signature affectionate ribbing, dry Kiwi-American contrast, and deep empathy.
Nick is matter-of-fact and philosophical about his health; David and Rob combine humor with earnestness and deep curiosity.
Notable for Nick’s open-hearted reflections and David’s willingness to be self-deprecating and corrected by listeners.

Takeaways for New Listeners

Nick’s journey is both a literal travelogue and a profound meditation on life while facing mortality.
The friendly, communal power of podcast audiences and Kiwi culture is beautifully evident.
Humor, vulnerability, and philosophical reflection are seamlessly intertwined.

Endnotes

Link to Nick’s paragliding video and Pookie (his math rock band) to be found in show notes.
Listeners can write in with feedback, corrections, and cultural anecdotes, and see David eating his words about NZ food trucks.
The episode ends reflecting on empathy, courage, and the drive to keep seeking aliveness—whether by surfing, paragliding, or simply saying yes.