Christmas Prep Episode???

Summary

Fly on the Wall with Dana Carvey and David Spade

Episode: "Christmas Prep Episode???"
Date: December 8, 2025

---

Episode Overview

In this Monday episode, Dana Carvey and David Spade jump into a whirlwind of holiday banter, current pop culture, and audience questions, all with their signature rapid-fire wit. They unpack Christmas traditions, dissect Hollywood's approach to holiday films, lampoon movie award bait, and riff on viral internet oddities. The duo moves from absurdist humor to surprisingly thoughtful takes on seasonal nostalgia, mainstream movies, Gen Z fads, social media, and the accelerating weirdness of AI.

---

Key Discussion Points & Insights

Holiday and Christmas Culture

• The Evolving “War on Christmas”
  Dana laments the perceived downgrading of Christmas in public events, sharing a story about a mall tree-lighting that avoided the word ‘Christmas’ entirely ([08:36]):

  • “It said tree lighting ceremony and they were careful not to say the word Christmas during the whole ceremony.” — Spade ([08:52])
  • The hosts discuss how many religious and secular people actually embrace the holiday’s symbols, and riff on America’s Christmas music dominance.
  • Quote: “Everyone loves Santa and the tree.” — Carvey ([09:36])

• Christmas Songs (and Who Wins)

  • The duo goof off singing “Jingle Bells” and debate why Christian holiday music is so much catchier ([10:55]).
  • “Silent Night, Jingle Bells, I mean, come on. It’s not a close call.” — Carvey ([10:58])

Movie Hot Takes & Hollywood Stories

• Strong (and Hilarious) Opinions about “Avatar” and James Cameron

  • Spade questions James Cameron’s dedication:
    • “I don't know if I would give up my life for 22 years to make three movies about the Smurfs.” ([11:47])
  • Carvey recounts an audition for The Smurfs and negotiating himself out of it ([12:04]).
  • They discuss the box office phenomena of Cameron’s movies, his infamous dealmaking (including George Lucas’ “Star Wars” toy rights), and the “string pullers” theme—rich vs. working class in Titanic and colonizers vs. natives in Avatar ([15:32], [17:03]).
    • “It's a psychological theme that people enjoy… rich people are miserable… slobs vs. snobs… native people are good, greedy corporations are bad.” — Carvey ([17:03])

• Movie Preferences & The Allure of Old Hollywood

  • Dana shares his nostalgia for older films and classic actors ([22:51]):
    • “Big movie stars meant something. It’s so cool—Redford, Paul Newman, superstars.” ([23:19])
  • Carvey’s “wisdom alert”: “Everything you get in life, you give up something and everything you give up, you get something.” ([23:57])

• Biopic Juxtaposition (Bob Dylan vs. Bruce Springsteen)

  • David and Dana bounce between the recent Dylan and Springsteen films, weighing authenticity and performance ([31:04]):
    • “Who did it better? The Bob Dylan pic… or Springsteen biopic with Jeremy Allen?” — Spade ([31:18])
    • Both agree Dylan's is “the typical hacky answer” but praise Springsteen for difficulty ([32:14]-[32:25])

Pop Culture Potpourri

• The Horror of “Wicked” and Scary Movies for Kids

  • They riff on the “scary for kids” critique of the new Wicked movie ([25:28]):
    • Spade: “The Wizard of Oz…scared me when I was five, so I never saw it again. I saw it the other day. Scared me again.” ([26:01])
    • Dana tells an old stand-up bit (“The X-Rated Wizard of Oz”): “Oil my ass, oil my ass…” ([29:09])

• Internet & Viral Weirdness

  • 1.7 million Facebook users roleplaying as ants becomes a running gag ([50:27]):
    • “1.7 million people are currently role playing as ants on Facebook. I like this one.” — Spade ([50:29])

• The Kardashians & Reality TV

  • They marvel at the entrepreneurial genius of the Kardashians, particularly their ability to “stir the algorithm” with new product launches, like padded bodysuits ([53:29]):
    • “The thing that I remember when people would say early on, what do they do? What are the Kardashians do? They're brilliant.” — Carvey ([53:29])
  • They joke about the fakeness of appearances (cucumbers/“peckless” outfits for men) and the evolution of TikTok-style fame ([55:00]).

• AI: Comedy, Pranks, and Existential Dread

  • Dana experiments with AI video software, sees it as transformative for film creation ([47:39]).
  • Spade expresses concern over AI-generated content/pranks (using AI to “fake” evidence of wrongdoing) and legal implications ([48:14]–[50:13]):
    • “If you show them robbing something and they say, can you prove it’s not AI? …You officially can’t really believe anything you see.” — Carvey ([50:08])

• News Oddities

  • Kim Kardashian’s “low brain activity” scan becomes a jumping-off point for riffing on stress, MRI experiences, and the explosion of anxiety diagnoses ([38:27]).
  • Latest in tech: contacts that enable night vision and allegedly let users see “creatures” invisible to the naked eye, quickly devolving into UFO and cryptid jokes ([57:04]–[58:12]).

---

Memorable Quotes & Moments (with Timestamps)

• On James Cameron’s endless sequels:
  “My interest has waned over the 22 centuries that they've been making the next five.” — Spade ([22:33])

• Dana’s stand-up roots:
  “My almost one of my very first standup bits…the X-rated Wizard of Oz.” ([28:44])

• On AI’s future impact:
  “You officially can't really believe anything you see.” — Carvey ([50:08])

• On the Kardashians’ business model:
  “The thing that I remember when people would say early on, what do they do?...They're brilliant…they’re business people.” — Carvey ([53:29])

• Biting wisdom:
  “Everything you get in life, you give up something and everything you give up, you get something. Discuss amongst yourselves.” — Carvey ([23:57])

---

Key Segments & Timestamps

• [05:21] – Transition from ad reads to actual episode content
• [08:36 – 10:27] – Discussion on Christmas’ cultural standing and secular/faith approaches
• [11:35 – 17:54] – Movie “hot takes”: Avatar, James Cameron, industry stories, snobs vs. slobs tropes
• [22:51 – 24:25] – Great actors, old movies, and “wisdom alert”
• [25:28 – 29:35] – Wicked, Wizard of Oz, and Dana’s old X-Rated stand-up
• [31:04 – 34:04] – Dylan vs. Springsteen biopic, celebrity performances
• [38:27 – 40:48] – Kim Kardashian’s brain scan and the culture of “anxiety”
• [47:39 – 50:13] – AI advancing in films, pranks, pranking ethics, legal troubles
• [50:29 – 51:45] – The “Facebook ants” phenomenon
• [53:29 – 56:47] – Kardashians, influencer culture, AI-generated celebrities
• [57:04 – 58:12] – Contact lenses, seeing in the dark, cryptid/alien jokes
• [58:27 – 59:43] – Wrap up; next shows and plugs

---

Tone & Style

• Signature Carvey/Spade Banter: Fast, irreverent, riff-heavy. The two improvisationally bounce thoughts, anecdotes, and jokes in both playful and biting tones.
• Pop Culture Skewering: They maintain a light, sometimes biting sarcasm when discussing showbiz, viral phenomena, and trends.
• Nostalgic but Edgy: Both hosts toggle between affectionate nostalgia for old movies/TV and a kind of cheerful resignation about modern fame and technology’s oddities.

---

For the Listener

This episode is a dense, high-speed ride through holiday pop culture, movie hot takes, AI paranoia, and social media oddities—all colored by Dana and David’s ability to render every topic comic, relatable, and just a bit absurd. If you want dry industry insight, sly stand-up callbacks, or want to stay a step ahead of the next meme-able weirdness, consider this required listening.

Highlights:

• Christmas nostalgia and the “war on Christmas” (08:36)
• Avatar/Titanic/James Cameron snobs vs. slobs parallels (13:07, 17:03)
• Wicked, old stand-up bits, and scary kids’ movies (25:28, 28:44)
• The rising unreality of the internet and AI pranks (47:39–50:13)
• Kardashian business genius and influencer commentary (53:29, 56:15)

“Everything you get in life, you give up something and everything you give up, you get something.” — the perfect summation for a show dedicated to finding the comedy in life’s trade-offs.

Transcript

[A]

You know this last year, Dana, after, yeah, my big dinner slipped into the old food company.

[B]

Oh my goodness.

[A]

Basically fused in with the couch. I'm talking stuffing, pie, all the fixes.

Bread, house I tore into.

I don't remember eating it. I said just the roof.

[B]

Oh, one of those. Yeah. I did a lot of pumpkin pie. Yeah.

[A]

Anyway, now what do you do now, Chavez, my holiday reset. I keep a couple servings in my carry on and stash some at home. My friends and family show up. The snacking gets a little too nutty. Chava has a new limited edition chocolate mint flavor. Right. That's basically the holiday in the glass.

[B]

Yeah, yeah.

[A]

Rich chocolate, cool mint, none of the sugar.

[B]

Crash might be my new favorite though. I still rotate in their chai and coconut aside. I blend mine with nut milk and frozen fruit or iced coffee.

[A]

A little extra.

[B]

Yeah, right.

[A]

Coming back, steady energy, easier digestion, muscles that actually recover. Metabolism support and a little help for my mind and immune system. Plus it's delicious. 25 grams of plant based protein. No artificial flavors, no soy, no gluten, none of the junk. Just real. All in one nutrition.

[B]

Yeah, yeah, that's right. Food coma recovery made easy. Go to cachava.com and use Codefly for 15 off your next order. That's good job. Kachava. K A C h a v a.com cofly for 15% off.

[A]

You know, some mornings feel impossible, Dana. Like today. Freezing cold holiday to do's piling up and you just want something from your wardrobe. You just want it to make your life easy and just perform.

[B]

Yeah. You want your.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Something to perform. You want a wardrobe to perform.

[A]

Yeah, you want a wardrobe to bring something to the table. That's why I'm turning to Quince. Their Mongolian cashmere sweaters.

[B]

Dana, Mongolian cashmere sweater. Awesome.

[A]

Insanely soft. 50 bucks for a cashmere sweater and looks way more expensive than they are. Italian wool coats. Structured, polished, perfect fit for these chilly months. Honestly, the down jacket, I got to get that from Quint because that's a go to it. Keeps you warm, looks sharp, holds up through the whole season.

[B]

Yes, Quince really nails the essentials. They got denim and chinos that actually fit. David. Outerwear that lasts. From leather jackets to wool top coats. All made from premium materials by trusted factories. And because they cut out the middleman, you get luxury quality without the crazy price tag.

[A]

You were in a high school band called Denim and Chinos if I recall.

[B]

Yes, and BBQ was the lead singer. Actually, she was good.

[A]

I've been starting Grabbing a few gifts for home, bath and kitchen. I don't stop at home. I go bath, kitchen.

[B]

Nice.

[A]

They make perfect presents that make it feel thoughtful. But don't break the bank. Get your wardrobe sorted and your gift list handled with quints. Don't wait. Go to quince.com fly for free shipping on your order and and a 365 day return. That's all year now. Available in Canada too. What is it, Dana?

[B]

That's Q U I n c e.com fly free shipping and 365 day returns. Quits.com sl fly.

[A]

You know, when it gets colder, I always fall in the same trap. Heavy meals, too much takeout, and suddenly I'm like, why do my jeans hate me?

[B]

I know. Yeah, me too. I mean, I'll open the fridge in December and it's like half a pizza and an orange. 1997. Not a lot of healthy options, David. But here's the thing. Staying on track doesn't have to be impossible. Our new friends@forkful meals.com totally flips that script. Honestly, I didn't think I'd stick with it. But these meals show up fresh every week. Chef prepared real food, not frozen mystery mush. Just heat it, eat it, and boom. You're not calling DoorDash for the fifth time that week.

[A]

Yeah, it's not just about eating better. It's about. It's about time. I'd rather spend 30 minutes working on a bit for my hilarious act than 30 minutes staring into my oven going, is this thing even on?

[B]

Right? This is that one little thing that keeps you sane during the cold months. No stress, no junk, just done. But here's the deal. Do it now. If you. If you wait till the holiday slump hits, you'll be knee deep in stuffing and regret. Had to fork full meals.com and use the code pod50 for 50% off your first order.

[A]

All right, that's forkful meals.com code pod50. That's pod50. Seriously, don't wait. Your future self will thank you.

[B]

Yes, thank you for not feeding me the leftover lasagna for the 12th time.

Someone asked me this question the other day, and I think we should get to it.

[A]

What is. No. I have a big announcement to make later in the show. It's about the movies for the holidays. So just be ready and stick around because.

[B]

Okay.

[A]

There's going to be some unpopular choices.

[B]

Yeah. I'm gonna do a juxtaposition for the audience about two movies that have something in common. Which one did it best?

[A]

Wow. What if it's the same thing I was thinking? I doubt it. Yours is a little more thinky, and mine is a little more stupid.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Yeah, that's probably about right. Look at. I've got this Tom Cruise eye now. My eye is, like, half shot on that side. You know, Tom Cruise has one. It's always like, squinting.

[B]

Is that an allergy or what's going on?

[A]

No, it looks. I think it's normal, but I just looked. I'm like, I don't know if it looks a little squintier.

[B]

I don't think the audience would find this disturbing, but sometimes we. We do get online like this. We're not recording a podcast, and we just analyze how each other looks.

[A]

Believe me, they light us up for this. But the beginning, every podcast, the first eight to 24 minutes should be about how we think we look. It's so riveting.

[B]

Has nothing to do with reality.

[A]

No. It's so dumb. I don't know. But I. I did have something else about, oh, I have this dent in my nose. My doctor goes, do you want to fix that broken nose? I go, when did I break my nose? He goes, I don't know, but it's broken right there. It's standing in. We can kind of. I don't know, wait. I think character.

[B]

Anybody who does a movie with the. With the great Chris Farley.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

I'm gonna get your stunts and things. He's gonna break.

[A]

Looky, Davey.

[B]

So you must have had your nose cracked at least three times.

[A]

He got mad at me because we did motivational speaker, and it was one of the, like, you know, we probably did about six or seven.

[B]

Oh, my God.

[A]

One. He had to pick me up, and then he falls through a table. And he does it, unlike rehearsal. He has to pick me up and go, oh. And we fall, and I fall on him, and I roll off, and I go, oh. Because it kind of rocked me a little bit, whatever happened.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

And then they went to commercially goes.

[B]

You acted hurt, and it ruined it.

[A]

And I go, I. First of all, I was hurt. I've got his blubbering ox whale landing on top of me. And he goes, you landed on me. I go, I know, but I'm a feather.

[B]

You're a demi lion.

He's really stuck in a football player. It just doesn't work.

[A]

I know. I'm. I'm so such a puss.

[B]

My partner was Mike Myers, and we were around the same size, you know, like 137 pounds or something.

[A]

Yeah. We were the number 10. It was me next to him as a circle. That's what they used to say. And then Lauren said, you're David. The stress of the movie is making you lose weight and Chris is gaining it. So it's still the same pound for pound on screen.

[B]

Your weight is moving over to him. As long as it adds up to a certain weight.

[A]

Yeah, that's what he said.

[B]

You're losing exponentially at the same rate. So we have the same mass of a total comedy in the frame.

[A]

I will tell you free time before we get into my movies and my real strong opinions.

[B]

Your picks. Your hot.

[A]

I will say Christmas is taking a little bit of a beating lately. It is December and I saw the other day there was a tree lighting ceremony for the Christmas tree in some dopey mall. I don't know.

[B]

Yeah, sure.

[A]

But it said tree lighting ceremony and they were careful not to say the word Christmas during the whole ceremony.

[B]

No.

[A]

Why? Why can't. So it's just a tree and you go. I would understand if you said they're doing the tree lighting at the Grove or whatever. You go, okay, but to consciously avoid that then what is the tree for a December to remember? Is it a Lexus dealership? Why do we have for the whole month, Isn't it for Christmas?

[B]

Well, I know a lot of different kinds of people.

[A]

Sure.

[B]

We know John Lovitz and others. I've never met someone from another religious faith that was upset about a Christmas tree.

[A]

I'd say stop that.

[B]

Yeah. Because everyone loves Santa and the tree.

[A]

And all the trappings, all things about it.

[B]

Yeah. And then if you're a faith, Chris, it's about Christianity. But I think at this point in America it's just Christmas. It's right. It's a fun holiday. And you. I, I don't like the thought police. I don't like to have words I can't use.

[A]

Right. I don't like that anti Christian feel because Christmas to me wasn't really about that because I am Christian. But you're secular. Yeah, I'm just. You're relaxed, more spiritual, but just as like, is this where we get the hammer? You can't say that by anyone else. You can't just sort of. We're taking a beating down in Africa. It's like, this is not the year to be Christian, I will tell you that. That's for sure.

[B]

Yeah, there's a lot of that going on, a lot of that.

[A]

Tough. So let's go back to the tree. We can call it a Christmas tre. I'm still going to go to these malls. I still don't want to offend people by saying it, but there's so many things with different religions. Or you're not allowed to slam someone else's religion.

[B]

Well, I don't know. I would say I think.

The Christian faith has the best songs.

[A]

There are some toe tappers in there.

[B]

I mean, I saw Fiddle and Roof, Heydays. I know all that good. But Silent Night, Jingle Bells. I mean, come on.

[A]

Not.

[B]

It's not a close call.

[A]

It's not a competition, but there's. There's some.

[B]

Jingle bells, Jingle bells, Jingle all the way. Oh, can you finish it?

[A]

Oh, I know. I. I know. I know that one.

[B]

It would be fun on an open.

[A]

Oh, what horse on it is to.

[B]

Ride in an open horsey sleigh.

[A]

That's a YouTube shutting us down because it's a song.

[B]

Yeah. Our screens just went to black, but.

[A]

Here'S my real strong opinions. Ready?

[B]

I want to hear them. Hot takes.

[A]

Get on the keyboard. Get ready. Avatars coming out.

I don't want to say I don't care at all, but it's close to that. I will say.

James Cameron is a great director. I don't know if I would give up my life for 22 years to make three movies about the Smurfs. I liked it the first time I saw it when I was gone. Smurf.

I mean, it's fine.

[B]

I read for the Smurfs and then I intentionally tried to get out of the part.

[A]

Did you really?

[B]

And I did read for Glizzle. I can't remember. They. Well, they were just like, well, do it as Smurf. Yeah, do this voice. Do that voice. And I was just so confused. And I go, smurfs. And so then I went on Conan the next night and I go, or I don't know what it was. Talk show. And I just said, I'm auditioning. It's ridiculous. And then the director called me up, really nice guy. He goes, you don't want to do this, dude.

[A]

Hey, you.

[B]

Yeah, now there's like nine of them. I would be having this shirt.

[A]

You could have. Yeah, nicer shirts.

[B]

Go. Yeah.

I could have real plants, real glasses, real shoes, cedar wood doors. But, yeah, Smurfs are cool.

[A]

Well, Avatar is about. I don't know what. I mean. I know it's got a message, but it's really so complex to make that. It's always three years too late. They're like, where I need and everyone working. I was like, another year on this, it was coloring in or whatever. Make the sky.

[B]

He's got something, man, we got to talk about. I mean, James Cameron, he does Titanic. No one wanted to make it. We know how the movie ends. Yeah, does 2.2 billion. Now it's crept up more. Then he does Avatar, waits 20 years. That does two. Something like that. Waits 20 years. I go, this is gonna bomb another 2 billion.

[A]

Sinking fox. Back in the days, Titanic was going to sink Fox. Perfect to say sink Fox with Titanic and then on Avatar and then that worked. So I'm not saying they don't work. I'm just saying at a certain. What's that? What's a sink fox? Sink fox means the Titanic was about the water and it was going to sink the Fox network or the Fox studio because they spent so much money making it. Because he kept saying it's not gonna be ready for Christmas. They're like, that's in the old days when you need to make the chunk of your money is like all the holidays combined, boom. Started Thanksgiving and at New Year's. But they waited and waited and everyone's getting fired. And then finally he brings it out and it crushes. The thing with Titanic is it made 25 million, I think the first weekend, which they didn't love. And second weekend, 25. Third weekend, 25. And they're like, oh, it's not going down. Everyone. Oh, no. Keeps going. And I'm like, wow. And then I went to saw it.

[B]

I did.

[A]

I went to saw it.

[B]

You went to saw it? Well, you went to Scottsdale Community Double down.

[A]

I went to saw it and I saw it at the Chinese Asian Theater. And I went.

[B]

You can't say Chinese anymore.

[A]

I said the Asian.

[B]

Okay, but don't even start with the Chinese. That just sounds.

[A]

I went to the Oriental Theater. What is it called back then? So I sit in the audience. I think I went alone because no.

[B]

Dudes wanted to go.

[A]

They're like, not going to tight. So I sit, watch an hour and a half split. A couple days later, come back, watch the other hour and a half. But I liked it.

[B]

Wait a minute. You left the theater and paid again and waited and came in because you couldn't go? Yeah, because your eyes got tighter. Your air conditioning. Okay, here's. Here's fun facts. This isn't funny, but maybe you can make it funny. First of all, when it went over the first Titanic, James Cameron made one of the greatest moves in history. Next to George Lucas negotia for Can I keep the toy sales? And they Said, sure, In the first Star wars from Titanic. No, I'm going back to people who have made great deals.

[A]

Oh, yeah.

[B]

George Lucas said, okay, you can keep that and that. I just want. If we make merchandise, I want to keep the merchandise. They go, this turkey will never make it. Yeah. 20 billion later, James Cameron, they said, we got to shut the movie down. We don't got money. We can't do the boat. We. You can do the Titanic, but we, we can't pay for the boat. He said, you don't have to pay me. So he forfeited his salary at that point, you know, he did Terminator was, you know, many, many millions. And that got the movie made. And then what he made was like, they can't even. Even. I can't.

[A]

With Avatar, he said, I will. I want to own the color blue. And they said, fine.

[B]

So here's. I'll give you a pop quiz. I know you went to Scottsdale Community College.

[A]

Quit saying that.

[B]

But yeah, I went to college of.

[A]

San Francisco, Bill Hader.

[B]

Yeah. So anyway, here's a question. How do you connect.

Titanic and Avatar? How do you connect them?

[A]

Because I will tell you, other than James Cameron. Water.

Am I close?

[B]

There's something more on a human level.

[A]

Oh, Love Story.

[B]

It's kind of one of the greatest selling things in history.

[A]

No. What is the. Is it like the theme of the movie?

[B]

Yeah, but it's an internal theme. It's a psychological theme that people enjoy.

[A]

And I won't understand it. Go ahead.

[B]

I'm probably not even giving you a chance to guess it, basically. Still. Let's start with the Titanic. The rich people are miserable and ends up. They end up being evil. The people down next in the boiler room, Irish people are the happiest people on the planet. They're drinking whiskey and dancing. Then you go up to the billion dollar. Top deck is like, what are you looking at? That's the great Poupon. They're, you know, it's like snobs versus slobs, which is kind of the Bill Murray and whatever. And then in Avatar, you have the native people who are good and kind and beautiful versus the evil, greedy corporations. So these are what I call string pullers.

[A]

These are the common. Yeah, yeah, sure.

[B]

Yeah. So there you go.

[A]

Yeah. They have that in a lot of movies. I agree. Right. What's that?

[B]

This is like comment.

[A]

Oh, okay.

They have that and a lot. I think it was in Superman. They had a lot.

[B]

Yeah, it's. People love it.

[A]

These people are just good folks. And then here Comes the big bad. Sure.

Make your home smell as good as it looks with pure for the smart fragrance diffuser that lets you control your scent from anywhere. Choose from hundreds of premium fragrances, schedule your favorites and set the perfect mood for every moment.

[B]

And right now, get yours free when you subscribe to 2 cents for 12 months. Don't wait. This limited time offer won't last. Try it risk free for 30 days [e-mail] hey, David, when it comes to gifting, you know, I've learned there are two types of presents. Okay. The ones that get returned and the ones that instantly become a favorite. Do you agree?

[A]

Yeah. That's Jenny Bird Jewelry definitely falls in the second category. These designs, as you know, are very modern. They're timeless, always feel special.

[B]

Oh, well, isn't that special?

[A]

That makes it my secret weapon when I want to give a gift that really, you know, lands. That's why Jenny Bird makes it easy. The packaging is beautiful. It's very thoughtful. The pieces are comfy enough to wear every day. Yeah. And they ship fast. That's perfect if you're last minute shopper like me.

[B]

That's right. I mean, I just want to do this when I hear that. Way to go.

[A]

Way to go.

[B]

And because the styles are so versatile, they always make an outfit feel pulled together. David. Without trying too hard. David not talking about you. Some of my wife's go tos are the best selling Florence earrings which always get compliments. And the Remy Bengal. Lightweight, water resistant and just as good stacked as it is on its own. These are the gifts you'll actually want to keep.

[A]

And you can get 20% off your first order with Jenny Bird by visiting jenny-bird.com and using code F OTW at checkout. You know when your day starts moving faster than you planned?

[B]

Yes.

[A]

That's when I reach for something small that delivers big on flavor. Me.

[B]

Me too. Me too. I think it's a great idea. Caffeine. David just got a serious upgrade with our 5 hour energy sh. They come in 17 bold flavors and each tiny 2 ounce bottle brings tasty caffeine with as much caffeine as a 12 ounce premium cup of coffee. Without the sugar or the sugar cracks.

[A]

Yes, they're portable, they're convenient, they pack the flavors of the season. If you're in full holiday hustle mode, this is where it gets fun. Tis the season for tasty caffeine. And five hour Energy is introducing a festive new flavor. Gingerbread snap.

[B]

Are you kidding me? Stop the stop. To stop the bombing. As you'd say, think cookie vibes but in a zero sugar portable shot that fits right into your day. Whether you're powering through the errands or getting into the holiday spirit. Gingerbread snap 5 hour energy shots bring a little extra magic wherever you give.

[A]

Your caffeine a flavor upgrade with 5 hour energy shots. Get yours in store and online at www.5hourenergy.com or Amazon. Today, kickstart the holiday magic with Gingerbread snap five hour energy shots available online at 5hourenergy.com or where Amazon. Yeah, yeah.

[B]

7/2 equals five hour more than you need.

[A]

I got another take. I didn't see Wicked, but I have.

[B]

A lot to say about him.

[A]

I didn't see shit. Listen, first of all, my joke about avatar was 3 hours and 18 minutes. I couldn't get through the poster. So I'm not going to go. 3 hours and 18 guy. Good luck.

[B]

Is it really? Here's the thing I say about Avatar. It became a technical achievement. You know, it was the first 3D that went massive. I think James Cameron is part scientist, part director. And so I think I would only see the Avatar movie at imax at the Grove on a. When it, when it's almost played out. So I'd be empty in a thousand seat theater. The screen is like 800ft tall.

[A]

I want to see it.

[B]

And that is immersive.

[A]

Yes. I want to go to an underwater theater and see it in some special way where I'm just like, it's your whole world. Because he does do a great job with what it is. My interest has waned over the 22 centuries that they've been making the next five. Okay, that's.

[B]

Well, I'm a, I'm a grumpy old man. Lately my wife and I have been going back to the greats. You know, we watched the Verdict the other night with Paul Newman and James Mason.

[A]

Oh, what a killer.

[B]

That never gets a killer movie. You know, we, we've watched recently, we always watch Midnight in Paris because it's a work of art with, oh, our friend Owen Wilson. And then we watched all the President's Men. Is surprisingly brilliant. The soundtrack and everything about it.

[A]

I will say the key to those, aside from that cool look of the old movies that it wasn't a look then when you look back, it's kind of a look. It reminds you the old days. Freaking big movie stars meant something. It's so cool. Redford, Paul Newman, superstars. Like I will watch anything.

[B]

Well, remember we would watch them in movies. You really would go to the movies ever.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Movies.

Yeah. You already see the thing. Yeah. So it. Everything you get. Now this is a wisdom alert.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Everything you get in life, you give up something and everything you give up, you get something. Discuss amongst yourself.

[A]

Yeah, let's look at a clip. Whatever he means. No, I get it. That's kind of. That's like. It's not do unto others.

[B]

No.

[A]

No, you don't understand.

[B]

If you.

[A]

No, I do get it. Give and get. Got it. You should give something to get something and open things up to come to you.

[B]

If you have a health issue and then you get better, you get this wisdom of appreciation in the moment. If you get a lot of money, then you worry about losing the money. You know, everything has its opposite. I've never found an exception.

[A]

Yes.

[B]

If you have a podcast, you. Your. Your co host on the podcast may not be on that day and you just. But you still have a podcast, but then you have to carry the podcast.

[A]

Yeah, that one stung. I guess I finally started to listen. But here's about Wicked, the movie Wicked stars Ariana Grande, our friend.

[B]

I did.

[A]

Oh, your friend.

[B]

I say that every time he was.

[A]

Doing this last time, she was gonna do Wicked for Wicked through the podcast. Then she goes, no, let's do it for the next Wicked. We're like in a year. And then crickets.

[B]

We would love to have her. I had so much fun doing that sketch with her, with Chloe Feynman.

[A]

Did you see Wicked? They're complaining this morning that it can be scary for kids. Now, let me tell you something. Over the weekend.

The wizard of Oz, which I don't even know if it correlates at all to the wizard of Oz. It's supposed to be like a prequel. I don't know what it is.

[B]

It does. It does in a way. Yeah.

[A]

I mean, they have Oz.

[B]

They have the Oz and they have a witches and yeah, they have the.

[A]

Cowardly lion, but he wants to be on Ozempic. It's like they switch it, make it more.

[B]

They have the brave antelope, which is an added character, right?

[A]

Yeah.

So this one, the witch, the green witch, is bad. I guess this is her in high school. I'm giving the wrong. Whatever it is, but I have to say, it's the wizard of Oz. I saw. Scared me when I was five, so I never saw it again. I saw it the other day. Scared me again. It's scary. The flying monkeys are. They're chasing. They tackle Dorothy and they pull her to kill her. They say they're going to kill her dog. I mean, you're a kid and you go, oh, they're gonna kill that dog. And they go, we're gonna kill you and kill your dog, Toto. And it's all weird. And they light they scarecrow on fire. I'm like, holy. So that's why. And it's all dark. The movie's very dark.

[B]

It's terrifying. I would put Margaret, Margaret Hamilton, I think played the Wicked Witch. The makeup, the voice, everything. I'd put it up there with Hannibal Lecter or anybody is the most terrifying villain in history. I think the monkeys were creepy because they had dwarfs dressed up. And by the way, I heard this from a dwarf friend of mine that there was so many dwarfs on the set.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

You know that there were just. And dwarfs are. No, it's like a convention. There was just massive orgies and they'd walk in and they're all having sex. We represent.

[A]

On the yellow brick Road.

[B]

Well, that was just a set. But when they're back on the lot and stuff, apparently it was just constant dwarfs.

[A]

They sneak over to Dorothy's bedroom where on the ranch or whatever. Where they used to shoot over there. Yeah, he's using this set. Yeah, I could see that.

[B]

Maybe Brad Williams, the great comedian or friend of ours.

Someone told me that. But it's an absolutely terrifying movie. I. I wanted. The great thing about Wicked, where I'm happy for them is the second movie did incredible. A lot of times the second one's.

[A]

Like, no, it's still. It's killing it. But they're saying like, kids are yelling, I'm scared, I'm scared. And so people are like, don't bring your kid if it's too scary.

[B]

Well, we didn't have the sound that loud as a kid. I'll go into a movie theater, you know, stadium. I'll get you Dorothy and even a dog too.

[A]

Don't you like how old phrases that you remember are not exactly right? Like right.

[B]

It's a little.

[A]

My dog Toto too. There's some that people say, movies that aren't exactly.

[B]

Could I do something that's a little R rated?

[A]

Yes. Okay.

[B]

Just a warning for the kids who are listening. My almost one of my very first stand up bits. Now in those days, folks, you just grabbed at anything. You didn't know anything about joke structure. You didn't know anything. So I used to do this bit, the X rated wizard of Oz.

[A]

Whoa.

[B]

And so the songs were a little different. So the scarecrow is like.

[A]

I like the setup.

[B]

This is an actual bit I did in comedy clubs when I was in College in the 70s. Yeah, the scarecrow's like, I'd get hard and I'd have more play. I'd even have some more play if I only had a dick.

So that was killed.

[A]

Do you think his balls are made out of hay or is he.

[B]

I don't know. You can go, you should have done this bit.

[A]

And then I would have a question in the audience.

[B]

The Tin man was like, oil my ass. Oil my ass. Because Heather through him in a thousand years. Dana. No, this is, I'm telling you, it was my first stand up bit. I was desperate.

[A]

I don't know.

[B]

All right, I won't do anymore.

[A]

No, it's pretty good. I, I, Here's a comic that's about to steal that joke. Here's what they say in the green room. I actually used to do something like that.

[B]

That's how they nab it.

[A]

That's how they. Nab is a great word. That's how they nab it. Then they go, I used to do a whole bit about like that. Yeah, I don't do that much anymore. And then they go, do it and steal your joke. And they go, remember I told you I used to have something like that?

[B]

I know, it's the greatest move of a comedian. Thief. Oh, I do something like that.

[A]

Yeah, I say that too all the time, though. Anyway, also, last thing I'll say is, did you see the new movie Bulgaria or whatever Bulgaria called Balenciaga? It's with Emma Stone.

[B]

Not yet. I'm not against it. I haven't seen it.

[A]

It's called Bologna. Bologna. It's called.

Galactic.

Beluga, Black.

Petunia. Begonia. Okay.

Took a while. We got Begonia. God. You know what? I'm not saying they directly stole that from Dandelion. My special. Isn't a begonia a flower?

[B]

Them's fighting words.

[A]

It's but a flower name out of the blue.

No, but that's not why I'm saying it. I'm saying I kind of want to see Begonia.

[B]

I have a question for you and Gregor. Heather, Anyone listening? Who did it better? The Bob Dylan pick with Timothy.

[A]

Or.

[B]

The Springsteen biopic with Jeremy Allen? Muscle.

[A]

Yes, chef.

[B]

Yes, chef. Which did it better, Springsteen or Jerry or Bob Dylan?

[A]

Because I love the songs and he's pretty good. And the girl plays Joan Baez. Monica.

[B]

Yeah, she was great.

[A]

Gorgeous in it. But I thought that was better than I thought it would be because I was on a Plane. If it's a plane movie, you're not expecting miracles. But I did like it and I did not see Springsteen. I do like Springsteen to watch, but it got. It came out kind of flatlining. And so when it comes out as a dial tone, I get nervous. Like, what do they know that I don't know? I know. What do you think? What's your vote?

I don't think Heather saw because most.

[B]

People would say the Bob Dylan one, which I really enjoyed.

[A]

I'll just a typical hacky answer.

[B]

Yeah, it's kind of like surfacy, you know, I'll go with the Springsteen because I think it was a harder thing for.

Alan White to pull off. And he did it. Great. Yeah.

And both of them.

[A]

Remember when Robert Wall used to say they should make Born to Run the. The state song for New Jersey. Have you listened to words? This town rips the bones from your back. It's a suicide rap. It's a death trap.

[B]

We gotta get out while we'.

[A]

Young. That's a fun song.

[B]

I know because it has a pop, you know, catchy melody. They don't really see the darkness.

[A]

Yeah. Spirits of the Night is a great one. Does he do it in the movie?

[B]

He did a lot. No, Spring Scene's brilliant. I mean, he is. He's funny too. And I, I just like. I like the way he kind of talks in the interviews and they're like. So when you did the album, how did you come up? Well, just, you know, Rick and I make a song.

Landman, he's from New Jersey, but, you know, he's. I went to his Broadway show and all the super fans are there and my wife's a super fan. And that was when he said. I've said this before, but I loved him for his opinion goes. My whole Persona, I just made it up. I never had a real job my whole life. I was making a little bit of money in high school, doing bands. I never had a job. And the working man thing is all made up. I just saw some guys. I got boots on and some clothes at Salvation army. So it's an all. And the crowd got really quiet.

[A]

Of course, he's like, what the.

[B]

We're saying this was a made up thing.

[A]

You don't carry a crescent wrench on you at all times.

[B]

I love him for it.

[A]

3:16.

[B]

He created the, the, you know, the Bruce Springsteen character, you know.

[A]

All right, I have one question before we get to this big headlines.

[B]

Okay. And also, don't we have a five hour energy thing?

[A]

All right, so Here we go. Let's try it like this. I'll give you the buzzing around segment, right? So I'm gonna give you a made up scenario. But first of all, Buzzing around, as you know, is sponsored by five Hour Energy's new gingerbread snap flavor. Tis the season for tasty caffeine with five Hour Energy shots that bring the festive vibes anywhere. With a portable re sealable 2 ounce shot, it looks kind of like this. Don't look. Head to your local retailer, Amazon or www.fivehourenergy.com to order yours today. Here's your scenario. Last week it was getting pulled over. This week, do something with AI.

Include Garth from that movie and include from Wayne's World and do walking and then a surprise person.

[B]

Alrighty. It's a. It's a high wire act.

[A]

No, it's easy. I tell you. It's easy.

[B]

Hey, hey, Christopher Welkin. I think that AI could probably like, you know, it could make a cake right now.

Oh, I didn't know. Well, but AI could probably make cupcakes, right?

Oh, I didn't know. But AI could probably make caramel popcorn. No, don't think so. AI can launch nukes. Launch nukes with caramel sauce on top.

[A]

Oh, I don't think Garth knows what nukes are. He thinks there's something from Nabisco.

[B]

Hey, hey, Red. Red Necky.

[A]

What do you think about AIs in there?

[B]

I don't give a tinker's cuss about AI. I'm red. Red Necky, the redneck comedian. You ever fart so loud, dog two straight away. Go. What, dad? Come and get some.

Hey, I'm Red. Red the redneck comedian. I asked mama to wash my daddy whitish. She said, sure thing. I say how to go? She said, great. I haven't seen skid marks like that since the Daytona 500. Come on, geese.

[A]

Since since the Dale Earnhardt crash.

[B]

I'm Red, Redneck.

Redneck comedian. I asked my mama what's for dinner? She says, roadkill. I. I said, what kind? She says, I don't know. That critter got smashed up pretty good. I think it's skunk. Come and get some.

[A]

Why would it be skunk?

[B]

I don't know.

[A]

It stinks.

[B]

You're looking for rhyme or reason? Yeah, I want it all. Okay, then I'll take it. With Dennis commenting. Okay. Carvey bringing out the heavy guns with Garth up there didn't know what a nuke was. Walken made a return appearance on his five hour energy sketches. All and Then kind of tagged it with a non sequitur. Or the redneck in the woods that doesn't have a very exciting existence.

[A]

Yeah. Rough childhood.

[B]

Yeah. Thanks for listening, David Spade. I hope you enjoyed the show. And scene. Now it's just me.

[A]

No. Holy shit. That, you know, I did. I don't have to say it, but I should say that that was buzzing around. Sponsored by new gingerbread snap flavor. Fuel your holiday hustle with as much caffeine as a 12 ounce premium cup of coffee and zero sugar. Available in stores Amazon or online www.fivehrenergy.com. that was good because it was a real interesting assortment of people.

[B]

I was trying to keep it, keep people guessing.

[A]

Okay, let's go to stories, because we got.

[B]

Let's go to stories. We got a big show.

[A]

So much today. So much show. Okay, okay. Kim Kardashian learns she has low brain activity after getting a brain scan. Oh, that was after mri. I didn't hear this story. I just heard she was stressed. And so.

That'S her quote. That can't be.

[B]

Well, what does that mean? Are they implying that she's dumb because he has low activity in her frontal lobes? Is that what they, I mean, it sounds like, oh, they say it's stress.

[A]

Her doctor's trying to say she's dumb, but using doctor terms. But they say it could be chronic stress. By the way, you can really get anyone to say they're stressed. Have you ever asked anyone or you ever grab someone's shoulders to give a back rub? Or if anyone grabs mine, I go, oh, my God. They go, you're tight. First thing you say, and then you go, I know, I'm really stressed.

Everyone is.

[B]

Yeah. I don't know. Like, anxiety is such a big word. I know that there was tons of anxiety in the 70s, but, boy, it was never really. You never met a good dude. God, I got a lot of anxiety today. You were just.

[A]

Even a word.

[B]

You were just anxious, but you didn't put a, you didn't put a label on it, you know?

[A]

Do you know how many times I would have beat the out of that word at SNL or any during stand up on the Road? Like, God, anxiety would have been to the top of the charts.

[B]

I mean, Dennis would all. Dennis Miller would hold his stomach and go, curfew. Christ sakes. I got Bilkus here or something like that.

[A]

Bilkus? Yeah, they had different words for it now.

[B]

I think that's some Yiddish phrase or something.

[A]

I, I, when I got an mri, I'll Give you. Here's. Here's a little throwback.

My guy. You know, sometimes the statistician technician takes a look at it first before they give to the doctor, and they go like this.

I go, are you allowed? What's going on there? And he goes.

I should let the doctor tell you the bad news.

[B]

I'm going to have to call the doctor. This looks weird.

[A]

Yeah. They said I have so much goddamn brains crammed in my frontal lobe. I have so much. I don't have room for anything. There's no extra space. Not even an adu. Nothing. Just, like, jam packed with info and smartness.

[B]

Have you ever just been anomalous?

[A]

I don't know for sure what that is.

[B]

So I got. So this tooth kind of fell out or something way back here. Don't worry about it, folks. So eventually they wait for the bone to get in there, and then the guy has a little thing, and he literally taps it into your. You know, you're numbed. Taps into the bone. Then he has a little tiny ratchet wrench, and he grind.

And you feel it getting tighter. It's called a post. So they stick it into your bone and grind it down in there, and it's there now. And he goes, yeah. Usually after three days, it's a nothing burger. So I go back a week later and I go, no, it's really, really sore.

[A]

He goes, something burger.

[B]

90% feel nothing at this point. Huh?

[A]

Wow.

[B]

They always say wow, but it's gotten better. But anyway, it was kind of. It'll be exciting if you ever lose a tooth for no reason.

[A]

I'm doing pretty good on that. My brother just got all his bottom teeth taken out, and it's like, so brutal. Why he has to do that, he's not doing. He got sick and they go, first order business. Let's get rid of those teeth. And it's like, huh?

[B]

What, because of bacteria from the teeth?

[A]

Yeah, it's a whole. It's a whole bummer. And then he has to go in after, and they're gonna put those rivets in there and rebuild.

[B]

Oh, man.

[A]

But I'll tell them about your story where you were sore for an hour.

[B]

No, it was no pity party. It was more like just, oh, most people have nothing at this point. It's just always kind of like, I'm always a little off kilter.

[A]

Off kill. Yeah. Make your home smell as good as it looks with pure for the smart fragrance diffuser that lets you control your scent from anywhere. Choose from hundreds of premium fragrances, schedule Your favorites and set the perfect mood for every moment.

[B]

And right now, get yours free when you subscribe to 2 cents for 12 months. Don't wait. This limited time offer won't last. Try it risk free for 30 days [e-mail]. you know, David, last year I gifted Masterclass to my sister for her birthday and she couldn't stop talking about it. See? See how that works? She integrated it into her mornings as a little personal growth ritual inspired me to do the same.

[A]

Okay.

[B]

Now it's part of my routine too. Just a few minutes a day and I feel sharper, calmer, more creative.

[A]

We needed to get you like honed down into that zone.

[B]

I'm so glad you. You just heard that. Like you've. You heard me. You felt. You felt my.

[A]

I hear what you're saying.

[B]

Yeah, exactly. You listen.

[A]

That's my crime. I'm a listener. You hear, but you don't listen. You look, but you don't see what. One of the favorite classes that I've heard about is Amy Poehler. You know what I mean? Amy Poehler does a improv class. And those are, those are things you can actually use in your everyday life. People have. When you're writing emails and you have presentations, when you're in conversations, it sort of makes you think a little differently. But there's so many with Masterclass. I mean there's how many 200 world class classes with genius people teaching you. And the plan started just $10 a month billed annually, so you can watch or listen anywhere on your phone, laptop.

[B]

Where else, or even online if you're traveling. And David, every membership comes with bonus guides and a 30 day money back guarantee. Thousands of bite sized lessons fit right into your schedule. Make it easy to learn from the best on your own time.

[A]

That's right. Masterclass always has great offers during the holidays. Sometimes up to as much as 50% off. Head over to masterclass.com fly for the current offer. That's up to 50% [e-mail] fly this time of year, cozy feels like the ultimate luxury. And Bombas is making it easy to get there. From socks to slippers to tees, every piece is designed to make you feel instantly at home. I gotta say, there's something almost magical about the fresh Bomba socks. And it doesn't stop there. Their slippers have the perfect sink and cushioning. Their tees feel substantial and comforting. And all of it keeps that cozy feeling going day after day. I got the socks right here, actually.

[B]

Gift giving. David has never been Simpler either. Running socks for the marathon are soft and snug. Baby socks for the tiniest toes. Slippers are teas for literally anyone on your list. Even your mom's new school ski lodge friend, Bombas has something for every foot, every style, every occasion.

[A]

And here's the part I love most. For every item you buy, Bombas donates one to someone facing homelessness. So when you treat yourself or someone else to cozy, you're spreading that warmth far beyond your own home. Head over to bombas.com flywall and use code flywall for 20% off your first purchase. That's B O M bas.com flywall code fly wallet check out.

Okay, next story. That was a good story.

[B]

Yeah, that was fascinating.

[A]

I like that one.

Shriek.

[B]

What in that green earth. I think. I think I might have. Is this the old.

[A]

I thought it was Miley Cyrus, but you're right, it's the Olsen twins. I thought it was Miley in a mirror, honestly, like leaning into the mirror. But this is a new shock ad, I guess. Well, or it's a poster for the new conjuring.

[B]

How old are they? Because they look and do you want to look 75? Like a very well preserved 75 year old. Why would they do that to the sweet Olsen twins?

[A]

Well, the glossy shellac on their face, a little decoupage. Also they're wearing like it looks like rubber suits. I don't know. I know it's to be talked about, so it's doing its job because two idiots like us are talking about it. But it is kind of fun. It does what it's supposed to.

[B]

Yeah, you're going to talk about electricity. Red bread necky would have said. It's all I'm gonna say about that. Those two gals look like they've been rode hard and put the bed wet.

[A]

Come and get some put away dry. Look at that hair. I'm gonna tackle them and put some some three minute miracle in their hair and leave it on for 20.

[B]

Let's try to do our version of that next time.

[A]

You know that looks like our movie poster. We should put a fly on the wall with us with that hair. I bet they do it by the time. This is a clip.

[B]

Hey, by the way, I downloaded Sora Pro 2.

[A]

Oh boy.

[B]

And you can go 15 seconds at a time, but you can stitch them together. So I had this movie that I wrote called Idiots and Monsters. So I've photocopied a piece of it and then fed it to the AI and then I could see the Scene being made. It's really mind blowing where this is going. You can literally make a feature film with your laptop. It's extraordinary.

[A]

You know, here's something that I think was going to be. One of the clips is, oh, you sent me this. Some stupid prankster, you know, these guys on Instagram that I can't stand.

[B]

Did I send it to you?

[A]

He goes into a door and he goes up to someone and says, this is your car. And he has a video of the guy's car and they're smashing the windshield in of the real guy's real car. And the guy stares him like, that is my car. And he's like, yeah, I did that. And the guy's scared shitless because now the guy's coming in to show him he just trashed his car and he's probably gonna kill him. So the guy starts freaking out to run out, and he grabs his wife and it's in. The guy's like, what are you a. And he's like, it's all AI but it's so scary looking that you hate these kind of guys.

[B]

He could be in a department store, he'll take a photo of someone unbeknownst to him or two people sitting on a bench. He'll somehow hack AI and make an instant AI that looks like they're doing something they didn't do. And then he can show them the video.

So it's this new thing and it's pretty, it's intense.

[A]

You know what? Because I hate those kind of guys anyway, because it's like the cheapest form of like, let's ruin someone's day for your own benefit. But he had a guy playing slots, like an older guy, and he goes up to this other dude and he goes, hey, this guy, when you were playing slots, he came back and he was sniffing your hair and trying to lick it. And he shows a video of the guy doing it and he went over the guy to start a fight with him and this dude's laughing and I'm like, he's going to beat the out of some poor guy who's just playing the slots going, huh? Yeah, shows him the video.

[B]

There's a lot of tension. We can't show one now though.

[A]

Well, we had. I, I, I, I, I don't know if you sent it in, but the, he sent it to Greg on, on email. Oh, on email. If you find it, put it up. If not, I will tell you that in the future it's going to be hard to prosecute people because if you show them robbing something and they say, can you prove it's not AI? You might go, I can't totally prove that.

[B]

You officially can't really believe anything you see.

[A]

So what happens then?

[B]

I don't know.

[A]

That's a problem. Yeah, I think we should take 20 minutes and think about. No. Okay, let's go to the next story and we'll go more upbeat. But we're here to give you the real facts, people.

[B]

Yeah, we don't. We're just real.

[A]

We're not like a fun show. Okay, Here's a fun one. 1.7 million people are currently role playing as ants on Facebook. I like this one. I guess it's like farmville. Remember farmville, Heather?

[B]

Oh, yeah, Yeah.

[A]

I guess it's like that. You play, you're an ant, and then you have jobs. Like, let's lift this potato chip up. And then you have duties and stuff. Look at this woman. Is like. Is like, oh, well, what are my aunt duties today? She forgets her own duties of life to go. Well, as an aunt.

[B]

Well, explain it a little better for me there.

[A]

I don't really get it.

[B]

That's just so you get an A picture or anything. It's like a video game in a way. And your aunt is. Because they are very organized, I think.

[A]

Like farmville, where you go. Okay, make a little garden.

[B]

Yeah, yeah, I see. Like a video game.

[A]

Embody an antenna you want. I guess too stupid. This isn't for us.

[B]

Well, when work is obsolete, this would be. People will have something to do.

[A]

Yeah, when the AI takes everyone's.

[B]

It does all the jobs. So then you just looks.

[A]

Is that Lindsay Lohan laying down? I don't think so.

[B]

That's Kathy Griffin.

[A]

Okay, that's Carrot Top with a hair straightener. All right, let's go to the next one.

And then we got. We'll wrap it up soon. Is there any more? We're not out.

Oh, this is. Remember the. From the girl Kim Kardashian that brought you the fake bush underwear? Oh, this is the new way to trick the world. Let's see this girl. This is what they sell. We're like a promotion for skims.

[B]

Butt and hip and hand sink bodysuit.

[A]

There are pads on the butt and on the hips. This is my figure without. This is my. Okay, she looks fine.

[B]

These are my allergy tests.

[A]

Those are allergy pads. Hold separately. Okay.

[B]

Okay.

[A]

I mean, so she has bigger boobs and a bigger butt, right? I mean, how much can we.

[B]

I don't really find it.

[A]

I know I like the first.

I just like the allergy with this bodysuit. 24, 7. Okay, stop. But.

Yeah, this is why I have a cucumber in my pants at all times.

[B]

Well, I have something like that on underneath my lumberjack outfit today, but I.

[A]

Have a peckless outfit I put on so it looks like I just have no muscles.

[B]

Do they have something that men would wear, like a layer? So it looks like they have big biceps and.

[A]

Yeah. Big thighs, quads, big wieners, big shoulders.

[B]

Is that. Does that exist? That's.

[A]

I don't know. But don't look under your Christmas tree because that's what I'm getting you.

[B]

I'm talking to you, the rock.

[A]

Yeah, I mean, I'm mad at Kim because. Don't. You don't have to say, like, you need this. Also, like Heather was saying, for women, you don't need this stupid suit. Let's just keep it an even playing field out there.

[B]

The thing that I remember when people would say early on, what do they do? What are the Kardashians do? They're brilliant. And I don't know who thought of it. It was the mom. Once the Osbornes came in and you would sell yourself, your. Your life would get public and you could become famous. And then they were attractive young women, and so we can monetize that and become billionaires. So first and foremost, they're just in a business. You don't. You don't identify it as a business, but they're business people. And so the only reason they put that thing out, the shapey thing, because I think they could sell a lot. There's nothing wrong with it.

[A]

Or they do it, talk about it, and then go buy something else in there. Like the fake bush I don't think is flying off the shelves. But then they get the company talked about.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

So ridiculous. And then they go, well, they're smart because then morons like you go, oh, they're smart because.

[B]

Well, they're just. They're very good of stirring the algorithm. And they had a hidden camera on the matriarch. Chris. Chris Cardette, was it? Chris. Is that the mom? And she's around the table with everyone. She goes, chloe, I need an ass pick. Like yesterday. Okay. From behind, squat in the sand. You know what I'm talking about. All right. If I have to see.

[A]

Your kids again.

[B]

Yeah. Amy Poehler.

Amy Poehler or Amy Schumer has lost a couple lbs.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

She looks very.

[A]

I saw some photos of Amy Schumer this weekend. She looked great.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Also, I Think reality shows. After the Osbournes and then the Kardashians, it was a new world for kids to go that don't want to really work. They go, hey, I argue in the kitchen. I hate my family too. I could do this. And then they go, I should start my own reality show. Or, tick tock. Let me just show my life. And that is a business for people. And it might have to be. It's the only thing you can't really fake.

[B]

It's very weird. I'm showing all the time.

[A]

Oh, wait, I will show you a story. I don't know if we have it, but it was. You know how they had that AI actress and then all the actors got mad? Of course.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

And they were. She signed with.

[B]

I think she had a following and the whole thing.

[A]

And now they have AI influencers. Like, they have one super. They're always a super babe. Goes to the US Open and hangs out and takes pictures. No one knows it's a fake person. They follow her because she's so pretty. And now they have one that has leukemia, so you don't even know it's AI right away. And then you're like, oh, I feel sorry for this influencer because she's sick. And she's like, this is real.

[B]

Well. Oh. And she's just saying that. And she's a digital copy of a human.

[A]

Yeah. Oh, her story is this. And you're like, yes.

[B]

I can't.

[A]

I don't even know if I should be mad or offended or like, I.

[B]

Can'T keep up with the world.

[A]

Oh, faking out GoFundMes. Yeah. I mean, I don't think she's looking for a Gofundme, but I'm sure people fake out gofundmes. And this girl, of course, she has to be beautiful too, no matter what the AI like, start beautiful. And then we'll make a story after that. But this is slightly offensive too.

[B]

Yeah. The line between reality sad and tragic and. Yeah, yeah.

[A]

Okay, what's next? And then we'll wrap it up.

[B]

I'm stumped. I'm stupid.

[A]

You're stupefied.

[B]

I gotta process that. I'll get back to you on the next.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Fly on the wall.

[A]

Ow. What's this? Gross. What is it?

[B]

What's that? Oh, they've invented contacts that can now see things that the naked eye can't. You can't see as well as see in the dark. Tell me more. Yeah, what's happening is they're putting the car.

[A]

I hate people that talk at the bottom. Go ahead.

[B]

That they can't see with the naked eye which amount. So they don't know if they want to release them yet until they can just only see in the dark. That's awesome. Of these contacts said that they saw.

[A]

Creatures that looked dark. Oh, like ufo.

[B]

Ufo.

[A]

As well as see them, it always.

[B]

Goes back to those guys.

[A]

Long finger. See. You go, oh, what? I don't want to see this super.

[B]

Well in the dark. But what was strange is they could close their eyes and still see through their eyelids, even in the dark.

[A]

Nope, nope. Many of them have.

[B]

I liked a little laugh after every comment and how creeped out they got.

[A]

Yeah. Also said that one of these dark creatures.

See.

[B]

So I hope that guy's making multiple six figures a year just.

[A]

Just playing someone else's reposting.

[B]

And he was affable. And if he sees this, good on you, bro.

[A]

What we're doing is we're going to talk over him.

[B]

Talking over that and then post our thing and some will talk over us and it'll just. You pass it along.

[A]

All right. I feel like that's enough for everybody today.

[B]

I think so.

[A]

Yeah. It's enough for you. We have another one we got to do tonight.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

It's fun, people. Someone in the comments goes, spades always burn out. Because he said they do 10 a day. I'm like 10 a day. If we do two, I'm laying down in a fetal position. I will say, dana, you don't know this, but I'm on the road. I'm going to San Diego in January. I'm going to Utah. I'm going to Caesar's palace with Nikki Glaser. We're. We're doing.

[B]

Wow, you're in the. The Coliseum.

[A]

Coliseum. It's going to be great. Nikki, Nick, you'll be great. And then a full tour. Davidspay.com get them while they're hot and keep watching.

[B]

And I'll be at Whole Foods in Tarzana in about 20 minutes. January 7th. January 13th, I'll be at the YMCA gym in Encino from 10:12.

[A]

January 21st, I'll be at the Shell station on Ventura Boulevard. Stop by, say hi. Okay. Thanks, Dana. And I always appreciate you coming in to do this for me.

[B]

Thank you. Thank you.

[A]

And I'll see you on my show.

[B]

Next week and podcast.

[A]

Hey, guys, if you're loving this podcast, which you are, be sure to click follow on your favorite podcast and app, give us review, five star rating and maybe even share an episode that you've loved. With a friend.

[B]

If you're watching this episode on YouTube, please subscribe. We're on video now.

[A]

Fly on the Wall is presented by Odyssey and executive produced by Danny Carvey and David Spade, Heather Santoro and Greg Holtzman, Maddie Sprung Kaiser and Leah Reese Dennis of Odyssey.

[B]

Our senior producer is Greg Holtzman and the show is produced and edited by.

[A]

By Phil sweettech booking by Cultivated Entertainment.

[B]

Special thanks to Patrick Fogarty, Evan Cox, Maura Curran, Melissa Wester, Hillary Schuff, Eric Donnelly, Colin Gaynor, Sean Cherry, Kirk Courtney and Lauren Vieira.

[A]

Reach out with us. Any questions be asked and answered on the show? You can email us at Fly on the Wall Odyssey that's a U D A C Y I dot com.