Jimmy Kimmel & The Celebrities We Love

Summary

Fly on the Wall with Dana Carvey and David Spade

Episode: Jimmy Kimmel & The Celebrities We Love

Date: January 22, 2026
Guests: Jimmy Kimmel
Hosts: Dana Carvey & David Spade

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Episode Overview

In this lively, laugh-packed episode, Dana Carvey and David Spade welcome late-night legend Jimmy Kimmel for a candid conversation spanning comedy, show business, late-night TV production, celebrity encounters, and existential musing. The trio reminisces about stand-up, navigates behind-the-scenes late-night grind, swaps stories about star charisma and fan interactions, and shares personal takes on everything from aliens and ghosts to parenting and showbiz friendships. Along the way: witty banter, light roasting, and moments of genuine reflection.

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

The Grind of Late-Night TV

Timestamps: 05:24, 12:45, 13:05, 18:16, 19:23

• Jimmy Kimmel details the demanding daily schedule of hosting his show, from combing through a massive packet of monologue jokes at 9:15 AM to wrapping at 6:15 PM:
  • “At 9:15, I get an email with like 30 pages of jokes and bit ideas…I whittle it down to about four pages…then rehearsal, then a writing session on the monologue from 3 to 5, then the show from five to six.” (13:05)
• Kimmel, Spade, and Carvey compare the realities of hosting—a parade of meetings, rewrites, and constant creative pressure.
• Kimmel notes the surprising energy demands compared to older late-night formats, and discusses how the schedule shifted over the years to accommodate family and life balance.

Hosting, Interviewing, & The Art Behind the Desk

Timestamps: 22:02, 22:18, 22:41, 23:40

• Interviewing comics is uniquely challenging:
  • Jimmy: “When you’re interviewing a comic, it’s weirdly the easiest and hardest at the same time. My natural inclination would be to say something funny when a story’s going on. But you know, with a comic, they’re getting to something…you don’t want to ruin it.” (22:41)
• Monologue Writing & Delivery:
  • He describes rewriting monologue drafts with help from a small team to ensure the humor lands in his own voice. (14:03)
• Surviving slow nights:
  • Kimmel: “If the audience has too much energy, I will subtract some, and if they don’t have enough, I will add some.” (14:58)

Nostalgia: Old Comedy Haunts, SNL Stories, & Legends

Timestamps: 08:00, 25:15, 28:10, 43:14

• The hosts fondly recall classic Hollywood eateries (Cheesecake Factory, Hamburger Hamlet) and reflect on nights of live comedy.
• They swap stories about the unpredictable magic of Don Rickles, Super Dave, Rodney Dangerfield, and the unique “mayhem” legends would bring when they’d walk out on stage.
  • Dana: “He didn’t have any jokes. He just had these rhythms of put downs.” (25:47)
• Carvey notes how watching old Dick Cavett and Carson shows now feels like witnessing the origins of the podcast format. (21:08)

Celebrity Encounters, Presence, and Fame

Timestamps: 38:28, 43:14, 44:34

• A revealing exchange about celebrity charisma and what separates a movie star from everyone else:
  • Kimmel: “Some people…just have this thing, and the audience just goes wild…Half the women think they might [sleep with] him…that’s something only women have.” (38:43)
• Dana and David share surreal moments from their SNL Mondays, when mega-stars like Robert Mitchum or Sharon Stone would just drop by their office.
• Kimmel’s moving account of working with Oprah:
  • “Oprah…she just was a presence, like a religious experience for everyone…She really understood what she was to everybody.” (40:45)
  • After working all day, Oprah made personal time for the crew and even gave a toast before leaving. (41:24)
• The trio jokes about the awkward dynamic of being recognized (or not) in public, especially in DMV lines or with their children's friends.

Stories About Showbiz Friends, “Posse” Dinners, and Paul Anka

Timestamps: 50:04, 50:26, 51:07

• When asked about Hollywood friendships, Kimmel confirms his inner circle includes Jennifer Aniston, Jason Bateman, and that he had just dined with them, Paul Anka, and Cyndi Lauper the night before. (50:26)
• Dana tells a story about Paul Anka coaching him to win $5,000 in Vegas blackjack: “Within a half hour I was up to five grand. I did it my way.” (51:07)
• The topic turns to Sinatra’s greatest hits, with everyone collectively agreeing on “My Way.” (52:08)

Strange, Absurd, and Existential Exchanges

Timestamps: 33:33, 54:12, 55:45, 58:52

• The group riffs on UFOs, astrology, and the unlikely odds of human existence:
  • Dana: “What are the odds the Earth exists and we’re on it? Right now it’s 2 trillion to 1.” (35:48)
• Carvey describes a ghostly sleep paralysis experience and leaving a hotel in the middle of the night, painting a spooky, comedic scene. (54:12)
• They discuss the hidden “cost” of AI and data centers, marveling at the sci-fi reality we’re entering:
  • Kimmel: “Hopefully the AI will figure out how to provide all the energy that it needs. If it is something we should fear, it’ll probably figure that out for itself.” (57:17)

Parenting, Night Owls, and Late-Night Wind Downs

Timestamps: 59:16, 60:23

• Kimmel shares his family routine after the show — racing home to put his kids to sleep and bonding over Harry Potter books and movies.
• Jimmy and Dana both confess they’re naturally nocturnal.
• Dana impersonates John Travolta, and Kimmel recalls spooning with him as a joke. (61:34, 61:39)

The Tom Cruise Effect & The Last Movie Stars

Timestamps: 62:31, 63:55

• Kimmel marvels at Tom Cruise’s energy, recounting how Tom was supposed to leave at a specified time, but instead greeted every fan in the audience.
  • “Now Tom being Tom Cruise seems to have no idea of this and decides to go into the audience and greet every person in the audience.” (62:31)
• Spade and Carvey reflect on the spectacle and mystique of today’s movie stars: Cruise, Pitt, and the lost era of Hollywood privacy.
  • Dana: “They call him the last movie star, but he rejects the title.” (64:20)

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Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

On Interviewing Comics

“My natural inclination would be to say something funny…but you know, with a comic…you don’t want to ruin it. And I also don’t love knowing the jokes beforehand.”
— Jimmy Kimmel (22:41)

On Oprah’s Presence

“She just was a presence. It was almost a religious experience for everyone there.”
— Jimmy Kimmel (40:51)

On Celebrity and Recognition

“It’s funny what you don’t want. You’re like, ‘Oh, I don’t want to be bothered,’ but then you’re like, ‘You know who I am, right?’”
— Jimmy Kimmel (45:46)

On The Magic of Tom Cruise

“Now Tom being Tom Cruise seems to have no idea of this and decides to go into the audience and greet every single person…It takes a very long time. It turns out whatever that deadline was, wasn’t so hard after all.”
— Jimmy Kimmel (62:31)

On Parenthood & “Bedtime”

“He’s eight years old. He still likes me to lay in bed with him until he falls asleep. Even though we feel he’s too old for that, we love it.”
— Jimmy Kimmel (59:33)

On Existential Odds

“What are the odds the Earth exists and we’re on it? Right now it’s 2 trillion to 1.”
— Dana Carvey (35:48)

On AI and the Future

“Hopefully the AI will figure out how to provide all the energy it needs. If it’s something we should all fear, it’ll probably figure that out for itself.”
— Jimmy Kimmel (57:17)

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Timestamps for Key Segments

• 05:24 – Introduction to Jimmy Kimmel
• 13:05 – Jimmy’s daily show schedule detailed
• 18:16 – Live vs. “Dusk” realities of late-night taping
• 22:41 – Interview dynamics with comics and not reading jokes ahead
• 25:15 – Rickles, Rodney, and comedy legends
• 38:43 – The aura of true celebrities in person
• 40:51 – The Oprah effect and making moments meaningful
• 41:24 – Oprah’s after-hours toast and leaving a real impression
• 50:26 – Kimmel’s Hollywood friend group and Paul Anka story
• 54:12 – Dana’s ghostly hotel experience
• 57:17 – AI, data centers, and the real cost of progress
• 59:33 – Jimmy’s post-show parenting ritual
• 62:31 – Tom Cruise, fan moments, and the “last movie star”

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Final Notes & Tone

Playful, irreverent, and honest, this episode is a fun blend of insider stories, sincere admiration, and classic humor. The hosts and guest blend rapid-fire jokes with revealing confessions and behind-the-scenes glimpses, making it a must-listen for comedy and late-night fans or anyone interested in the people behind the personas.

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For more inside comedy, showbiz legends, and brilliant banter, subscribe to “Fly on the Wall.”

Transcript

[David Spade]

The other day, I had a moment where I was. You know, I like tapping into my adventure side, Danny.

[Dana Carvey]

I've heard this.

[David Spade]

I've heard this.

[Dana Carvey]

Yeah.

[David Spade]

I went out in the snow barefoot.

[Dana Carvey]

Of course, I was a little out.

[David Spade]

Of LA a little bit, but yeah, I just want to feel something real. I want to touch grass, touch snow. It made me think about how disconnected our nutrition has gotten. My cupboard used to look like a graveyard of supplements with ingredient lists. And it would come over and go, are you okay?

[Dana Carvey]

A graveyard of supplements? Ye.

[David Spade]

I'm trying to read labels. It's like the Hunger Games. What brand can I trust? What's filler? What is artificial? Why does every clean product have something different? Feels like I'm being tricked. That's why. Cachava in a breath of fresh air. It simplifies everything. Since adding it into my routine, I felt a real difference. Steady energy, better digestion, a supported metabolism in mind, and even immunity benefits.

[Dana Carvey]

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[David Spade]

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[Dana Carvey]

Remember, if you're hungry for a snack, it's.

[David Spade]

Thy ticket lady Jennifer of Coolidge.

[Dana Carvey]

Well, many thanks, good sir.

[Jimmy Kimmel]

Here is my discover card.

[David Spade]

They accept Discover at Renaissance fairs.

[Dana Carvey]

Yeah, they do here. Discover is accepted at the places I love to shop. Geth with the times.

[Jimmy Kimmel]

With the times.

[David Spade]

You're playing the loot.

[Jimmy Kimmel]

Yeah. And it sounds pretty good, right?

[Dana Carvey]

Discover is accepted at 99% of places.

[David Spade]

That take credit cards nationwide. Based on the February 2025 Nielsen report.

[Jimmy Kimmel]

You looked at whatever the piece of paper and you're like, oh, this is not funny. I'm not gonna do it. She said they were.

[Dana Carvey]

No way.

[Jimmy Kimmel]

They were going wild backstage. Like God, when I was the host. You look around the audience, you realize, oh, half of these women think they might him like they. They're here to potentially be pulled out of this audience to be. I did a show called the man show that was designed specifically to counteract Oprah. And.

[Dana Carvey]

Well, we have James, Jimmy James Phineas Kimmel. No one knows that that's his middle name.

[David Spade]

Jim Kim, also known on Howard Stern As Jimbo Kimball is a friend of the show. And I've been on his show probably 20 times. That's, you know, when I'm promoting, I usually pop by Fallon, pop by Kimmel, and there's no Ellen right now. But I have a lot of fun with this. This guy. And he's always a good audience. I will say he's a good laugher. I go on there, he kind of lets me know he knows kind of what I might talk about. He just says, just go. Just start blabbing. And he'll chime in, like something funny to add to it. So that's a good time on there. And now we get him. We've had him before. He interviewed us on here.

[Dana Carvey]

While he interviewed us, he came around and he's. We got him on this podcast. He had just finished his show.

[David Spade]

Oh, right. He was in person when he interviewed us, right here in this room. And then we got him after the show and he was nice enough to jump on with us and we talk about his show and how hard it is to do it, how long he's going to do it. Yeah. And we basically just laugh a lot.

[Dana Carvey]

Yeah. And we do get some inside baseball about his personal life and what, what his happy place is, what makes not doing the show. Do you have a happy place, David? You know, what's your happy place?

[David Spade]

Not really.

[Dana Carvey]

Besides being on this podcast with me. Think of something else.

[David Spade]

When I'm in line at McDonald's at the drive thru.

[Dana Carvey]

Don Rickles used to say there was no greater thing than when he would kill in Vegas. And he's in the jet. I don't know if it's private or. But. And he's flying away with a big fat check. He did the work and he got the money.

[David Spade]

Yeah, I do. I do say there's stuff in life that's still fun. And it is coming up with a joke that works. When you think about. I thought of one yesterday morning and I wrote it down. I was like, giggling, going, this might be funny. I'll have to try it. I don't know what it is right now, but that stuff is fun. It gives you a little endorphins.

[Dana Carvey]

Yeah. In the end of the day, that's. That's kind of what it is. Like, Jay Leno was obviously the Svengali of stand up, you know.

[David Spade]

Yeah.

[Dana Carvey]

It's very simple, you know, because people are asking, what do I do? He goes, hey, yeah, right, right. Joke, tell joke, get check, write joke, tell joke, get checked. Because people are all into the Drama. And I should be a middle act. And what do I write? Joke. Tell Jo someone stole my act. Write another joke, then just write more jokes.

[David Spade]

Anyway, here's Jimmy Kimmel.

[Dana Carvey]

Here's Jimmy Kimmel. Not Jay Leno.

[Jimmy Kimmel]

Hi there.

[Dana Carvey]

Or there's a rumor that you're gonna do Smartless after this, but no, I mean, how many.

[David Spade]

What?

[Dana Carvey]

When does you do that?

[David Spade]

After your whole show?

[Jimmy Kimmel]

How's it going, guys?

[Dana Carvey]

I get exhausted thinking about your schedule.

[David Spade]

Bad enough.

[Jimmy Kimmel]

It'S not, you know, it's. You get used to anything, right? I mean, whatever the schedule is, you become acclimated to it.

[Dana Carvey]

Yeah.

[David Spade]

If you do a movie and you're doing 14 hours a day and you get a 12 hour day, you're like, yes.

[Jimmy Kimmel]

Yeah, Right.

[David Spade]

If you do any other show and you work an hour, you're like, yeah.

[Dana Carvey]

And when you. And John Oliver and Fallon and, you know, all the. All you guys, Colbert, come into the podcast world. We will welcome you. There's 4 million podcasts.

[Jimmy Kimmel]

Thank you. Yeah, it's there. We need. We do need more, for sure. I think it might be a bad sign for your podcast that this is my second time on and I've never. I was only at Saturday Night Live once. I went to.

[David Spade]

You don't even get it on your tv.

[Dana Carvey]

Do you realize how famous you are? How many years is 23 years? I don't know. How long have you been 23?

[Jimmy Kimmel]

We.

[David Spade]

Almost 23.

[Jimmy Kimmel]

23 in January, though. It's crazy, right?

[David Spade]

That.

[Dana Carvey]

Can you go to a mall without a baseball cap and no one knows?

[David Spade]

Why would you.

[Jimmy Kimmel]

Are there still malls? You know, I do go to the mall every once in a while and. Have you guys been in the mall?

[Dana Carvey]

I love it so much. One is, it's the only time I get in the Christmas spirit is a mall. The music. And then I saw AI woman waving at me. And everywhere I went, she looked and winked at me. And it was like a hologram. So I. I do like them all, you know, that's.

[Jimmy Kimmel]

What mall were you at? Are you sure you sound at the mall and not tripping or something? Because.

[Dana Carvey]

Chico. Chico, California.

[Jimmy Kimmel]

Oh, yeah, that's the. But no, that's a prison, Dana. That's.

[David Spade]

Yeah, you're out of prison. No, Jimmy, all kidding aside, I know Dana likes to joke around.

[Dana Carvey]

I joke around. David, give us a serious question.

[David Spade]

I went to the Grove this weekend and there's all the. The tree and all this stuff. So I see what Dana's talking about. It's very festive and I ate at The Cheese Dick factory, which I still go to, I still like. And you know, there's some good stuff. They have a new item on page 88 of the menu.

[Jimmy Kimmel]

It's longer than the Bible. More chat. There are chapters.

[David Spade]

Our salads. Where's salads? That's chapter seven. I go, oh, okay.

[Dana Carvey]

Can you get everything in the world at Jerry's Deli? With the big lamination gone, there's no Jerry myself. Okay?

[Jimmy Kimmel]

You got to get out of the house.

[Dana Carvey]

Billy's Deli.

[Jimmy Kimmel]

Billy Deli? Yeah.

[Dana Carvey]

How about hamburger? Don't tell me Hamburger Hamlet's not there.

[David Spade]

Like, where can you play a good game of pinball?

[Dana Carvey]

I, you know, I'm nostalgic about Hamburger Hamlet because of.

[David Spade]

I love that place. I used to go there. That one on Doheny and Sunset. All time.

[Jimmy Kimmel]

David, did I tell you, I don't remember if I told you this, but I saw you walking one day.

[Dana Carvey]

I don't know, why was he walking?

[Jimmy Kimmel]

He was just walking on the street. And I almost, I, I had to pull a maneuver because I was like, oh, I gotta text him while he's walking. And I don't know why that. I thought that would be a great thing to do. But it became. It was too dangerous. It was, it was Hollywood. You were walking somewhere and I thought it was interesting. And then the circle was completed this evening when Kevin Nealon was on my show, you guys know Kevin. And he said that of all the guests. Of all the 170 some odd guests on his show, hiking with Kevin, the most difficult one to walk with was none other than David Spade.

[Dana Carvey]

Yeah.

[Jimmy Kimmel]

Who. And correct me if I have. Have any of this wrong or if he had any of this wrong. But he said that you requested that. That there'll be no incline whatsoever, which is not hiking. You have to have an incline if you're going to hike. Otherwise it is just a stroll.

[Dana Carvey]

It's strolling.

[David Spade]

This is getting into semantics. It is. It's really down to a trick way to do an interview. So it's like, hey, we're going to go bowling. Hey, we're going to be in an ice bath. So I said, kevin, I barely like walking, so I don't want to hike. Plus I got a bad neck. So I go, listen, why don't we go to the Cayman parking lot and walk? And it'll be funny because we're. It's easier for you too. And then we won't be like. And then I got a Hotel Transylvania, you know? So I said, I might be a better Interview. And he was like, no, no, we'll. We'll go on a little. It'll be barely. It'll be flat. And then we get up there in the middle of the interview. I go, dude, are we going uphill? I, of course, got incensed.

[Jimmy Kimmel]

Right, sure. You promised.

[Dana Carvey]

Have you been on it, Jimmy, if you've been on hiking.

[Jimmy Kimmel]

I have. Yeah. We went on. And it's funny because. Well, for people who haven't seen the show is Kevin goes on a hike with somebody. But it's funny because it's not like. It's not like he cleared the area. So walking. And Kevin's got his selfie stick, which is just a dangerous way to walk. Anyway. Everyone passing you flips out because you're.

[David Spade]

There with, you know, no attention, please.

[Jimmy Kimmel]

A giant. And then, so like three quarters of the interview is being stopped by people who want to, like, take a picture or something because they don't understand there's a show going on.

[Dana Carvey]

He has a drone controlled.

[David Spade]

He has a drone now, and he's doing that. He's got a siren on his head. And so everyone's like, I thought Jack Black was funny. You know, I. I have seen it. We are buddies with Kevin forever. It is hysterical. But he's really, like, lugging waters. He's got, like a. Emergency cinder block.

[Dana Carvey]

Yeah.

[David Spade]

I'm like, kevin, you don't need all this stuff on you. It's so hard to hike for you.

[Jimmy Kimmel]

He's also my.

[David Spade]

Still complaining.

[Jimmy Kimmel]

He gets real serious about the equipment, too. Like, you see that serious side of Kevin that you didn't know was there, the technical thing.

[David Spade]

Yeah, this is a camera. Nikon TX40 cum sucker 3000. I'm like, oh, so it's just a camera. I got it.

[Jimmy Kimmel]

There's a real dad thing that happens. All of a sudden he's like, you know, it's like, oh, yeah, this is what he's like with his son. Like, you know, making sure the equipment is right and don't.

[David Spade]

Oh, that's like. He spanked me one time.

[Dana Carvey]

Over a rock.

[Jimmy Kimmel]

But you learned your lesson.

[David Spade]

Where did you guys go? To the Iger Sanction. You're so tough.

[Jimmy Kimmel]

We went to, I don't know, somewhere in the valley. It was like a. A hiking area I was unaware of. In. In the valley.

[David Spade]

I mean, he must repeat those because not everyone wants to drive out to Chino Valley.

[Jimmy Kimmel]

He must repeat it. And also, it's weird to get an invitation to do a talk show and you. And he's dropped a pin. That's where. That's how you find him.

[David Spade]

How to find address. Yeah, yeah. Ways. And then an Uber.

[Jimmy Kimmel]

Yeah. We're cutting through, like somebody's yard in a cul de sac to get to the.

[David Spade]

Oh, I got a question for you. First of all, I do. It's about your show, but also about your show. What is the rigorous schedule down to at this point? Is it still rigorous? It's still hard to do a show. Yeah, but what is the first thing in the morning you start getting hit up with joke ideas or pre tapes or.

[Jimmy Kimmel]

Well, you really want to know the schedule you hosted.

[Dana Carvey]

I've hosted it. We kind of know schedule, but mine.

[David Spade]

Was harder when I hosted.

[Jimmy Kimmel]

I'll go through a really, really quickly. Is in the morning at 9:15, I get an email with like 30 pages of jokes and bit ideas.

[David Spade]

Shut up. Is that true?

[Jimmy Kimmel]

Perfect. I mow through that. I whittle it down to about four pages. I send it back. I then get on a zoom with our producers and have a meeting about the guests that night. I take a shower, I drive into work. I have rehearsal as soon as I show up, which is at 11:30. And then I go up to my office and review a bunch of material, go through those jokes again, go through the bits. I'll make edits on bits, and we shoot things if we have to. And then at from 3 to 5, I write the monologue with two other guys here in the office.

[David Spade]

Really?

[Jimmy Kimmel]

And they do a draft of it and I sit and rewrite the whole thing. I mean, I wouldn't know. I don't mean I rewrite the whole thing.

[David Spade]

Right. You just gotta make it in your own voice.

[Jimmy Kimmel]

Yeah, I do. And then I go do the show from five to six.

[Dana Carvey]

How often, like, you're in the wings and you're about to come out and you just go, yeah, I. We don't got it tonight. This is stinker. I. I gotta just riff it.

[Jimmy Kimmel]

I mean, you know. You know, you can always kind of reach in and pull something out.

[David Spade]

Something.

[Jimmy Kimmel]

Tonight I have good crowds.

[Dana Carvey]

What was tonight?

[Jimmy Kimmel]

Backstage tonight there. It was full crickets. It was. I was like, oh, my God, is anybody out there? Mike, did they. People show up and that's where it becomes like. That's when you get a little bit nervous and. But I find that if I just like, add a little. If the audience has too much energy, I will subtract some and if they don't have enough, I will add some.

[David Spade]

Oh, yeah, that's a good idea. Sometimes they're too energetic and they're laughing at setups. You're like, let me just get this out.

[Jimmy Kimmel]

Yeah, yeah, it's funny because I'm never happy. Whatever. It's like they laugh too much or they didn't laugh enough.

[Dana Carvey]

Shut up.

[Jimmy Kimmel]

Very rarely do we hit that exact right amount.

[Dana Carvey]

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[David Spade]

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[Dana Carvey]

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[David Spade]

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[Dana Carvey]

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[Jimmy Kimmel]

Yeah, it's called the Tonight show for God.

[Dana Carvey]

I know. And you guys are all like afternoon Mike Douglas hours, you know, it's not called the Dusk.

[Jimmy Kimmel]

Well, we were live at the beginning, so. And we were on at midnight on the east coast. So we were on from 9:05 to 10:05pm back in the old days. And that felt, that really felt like a late night show. And also there's a crazy energy out on Hollywood Boulevard at that time every night and because there's a lot of crazy people out on Hollywood Boulevard at that time every night. And so then everything, it was weird because if we do pre tapes it suddenly would go from night to daytime. And then I felt like, oh, we should do all our pre tapes at night. But we're, you know, that didn't really work because we're doing the show from 9 to 10 and it became just like a, like an 18 hour a day job and it became crazy. But then over the years people had kids and I had another set of kids and we started like shortening the day and eventually this is as short as it can get though. From 9:15 till, till 6:15. That's, that's the minimum amount of time you can put into it.

[David Spade]

Yeah, I even did that lights out show and it was way harder than I thought because from the second I get up there's just a stack of emails and things and things. And I'm not Jimmy Fallon. Like we both have to say we're not out there doing like tap dancing with JLo. He's got to drive to Staten island and do like a bumper cars or someone and he's got to learn a song and dance with Ariana Grande. It's hard to do all that stuff. It's so much energy.

[Jimmy Kimmel]

Not for him, but I think yes, for us it will be hard. But I have witnessed him in action and it is, it's quite remarkable. It's like, it's weird because you have a lot of professional singers who you know, show up and like he doesn't even wear the earpiece that you need to wear to make sure you're singing well. He just sings well. He has a super. I don't think people realize like how talent Actually, it's a weird thing is you're like, oh, he's talented. Like we're not. I'm not talented. You know, like I can go up and tell some jokes and write some stuff. But he has like real talent in the old fashioned way.

[Dana Carvey]

I was told that if he choreographs of dance number, even with Justin Timberlake, whoever, he just has it.

[David Spade]

He does.

[Jimmy Kimmel]

I've seen that happen. Yeah, he came on our show and he did a Christmas song and he was, he was. There were no mistakes. He just nailed it. And it was unbelievable. It really was.

[Dana Carvey]

Hey, this is crazy. A Christmas song, you know, amazing.

[David Spade]

So that's just my like so kickball chain fan fan back. And you're like, yeah, it was disheartening.

[Jimmy Kimmel]

Is really what it was.

[David Spade]

Yeah, I have a very thin lane of just mumbling jokes. And then some people do a lot more. Dana does a lot more.

[Jimmy Kimmel]

Yeah, Dana's got talent.

[Dana Carvey]

Yeah, Dana's got not, not like found. There's only. But I, I, you know. You know what wears kind of well though later on, at least for me on YouTube at night, is Dick Cabot. I mean, I really enjoy watching old Dick Cavets. He got his ass kicked by Carson or whatever you want to call it. Right. They were kind of like the original podcast. You could hear traffic going by. It was very lo fi, long interviews with Robert Mitchum and stuff. You know what I love?

[Jimmy Kimmel]

I love watching with these old talk shows, especially like with Carson, what I really love seeing because we've all seen, we all seen the hatchet, the highlights and like all these visuals that we're all so familiar with.

[Dana Carvey]

Yeah.

[Jimmy Kimmel]

But to watch like a year three when he's still in New York, Wednesday night show and they have these at like the museum of television or radio and, and some of them are just dreadfully dull. And it makes you feel better. It really does.

[David Spade]

Yeah, true. Like when he was 90 minutes, it.

[Jimmy Kimmel]

Rough 90 minutes was a very long time to do a third guess or fourth guest.

[David Spade]

He's like, now what do you do, sir? You know, interviewing is tough.

[Jimmy Kimmel]

That.

[David Spade]

Interviewing is the toughest part for me.

[Dana Carvey]

I have a. Doing your show, an appreciation for how you do that because it is, it is like trying to catch the wind. You know, you let the guest go. You, you do I jump in now. You know how like over the years as your skill set in your mind increased in terms of letting a moment happen and not interrupt. It's just hard.

[Jimmy Kimmel]

Well, there's a lot of factors, I think, and one of Them is when you're interviewing a comic, which is always. It's weirdly the easiest and the hardest at the same time. Because you do not want. My natural inclination would be to say something funny when a story's been going on for a bit. But, you know, with a comic that they're getting to something. Ideally, at least they're getting to something, and you don't want to jump on. On their setup. You don't want to ruin it. So you have to be cognizant of that. And I also don't love knowing the jokes beforehand.

[David Spade]

I know. I hate it.

[Jimmy Kimmel]

Yeah.

[Dana Carvey]

So I don't want, you know.

[David Spade]

But you know when to jump in. But Jay used to think of jokes back. I didn't know that. Like, he would look at it and he goes, when he gets to this point, I'll say this. And he would. I would be in the middle. He'd say something kind of funny. Oh. But I realized later that was part of the meeting is like, what could I say here? What is here? So he was really coming off better than me.

[Dana Carvey]

You don't want to know the bits. You just get it like a bullet point. You don't want to know the line by line.

[Jimmy Kimmel]

Yeah, yeah, I don't want to know. I. I prefer. Because then it's just like the whole thing feels fake, you know? So at least I'm a member of the audience. I'm sitting there with a comic. Unless they need me to know something, I prefer not to know.

[David Spade]

I try to tell. When I go on Ken, who works me, I say, try to give him as little as possible or maybe just give him an out where he knows it's over.

[Jimmy Kimmel]

Right, right.

[David Spade]

And then you kind of just get to go, all right, I kind of know what Spade's going to. He's going to fuck around here. And I just got to know when to keep things moving.

[Jimmy Kimmel]

I feel like also that, David, you've been on so many times now that I just kind of know where. Where you are in the story, so. And, yeah, we don't really need you.

[David Spade]

Go, this is funny because I do. This is really funny because he did it last time.

[Dana Carvey]

Can I tell you? He did this story three times.

[David Spade]

Okay. I know the story.

[Jimmy Kimmel]

Rickles would do that every day. Rickles had, you know, Super Dave also was another one. Was great because, yeah, he would do same stuff. Once I was watching an old video of Super Dave on Carson. It was shortly after he'd been on my show, and he did exactly all the same material. And I Was like, oh, this is incredible. Like, his. His philosophy was, nobody gives a. Nobody remembers. And it's true. I mean, we were also like, oh, I can't do that joke. You know, Colbert did a joke like that in October of, you know, 2020.

[Dana Carvey]

Nobody's keeping track of all or.

[David Spade]

And who's going to see both shows at the same time. I saw Rickles guys on something two nights ago where he's walking around, like at the Golden Globes, and he's walking the crowd. He goes, julia Roberts is over here. Julia, I live near you in Malibu, two houses down. You don't invite me over for dinner. And she goes, don, anytime. He goes, you have no lines, Julia.

[Dana Carvey]

He.

[David Spade]

She laughs so hard because she's trying to ad lib with him. And no, no, Julia, no one.

[Dana Carvey]

As a kid, I didn't understand as a young person, but it seemed like mayhem when he came out. Give out a cookie, put him in the corner. The show started, you know, all these abstract put downs. He didn't have any jokes. He just had these rhythms of put downs, you know, Frank, that the mob called Vinny, you know, and they're on YouTube and you just go. And same thing with Rodney. I'll see YouTube clips of Rodney and just go, damn. The amount of great jokes. Just appreciate those guys.

[Jimmy Kimmel]

It was funny with Rickles, like, he had some sense that he done like some of these jokes before. So he would truncate them in a way that sometimes cut out the setup to the joke.

[Dana Carvey]

Yeah.

[Jimmy Kimmel]

So, like, he had jokes about his wife, like, version, like, hey, she with the jewelry. She's signaling ships. And it was like, wait, but what led us to that jewelry? It's got big jewelry.

[David Spade]

Yeah. He's like, he's doing jokes about Joan Rivers.

[Dana Carvey]

Johnny, Johnny, it's was all this.

[David Spade]

I like Johnny. It's over. That was funny. Johnny.

[Dana Carvey]

Yeah. Martin Short, who's. We love. Of course, you know, the compliment and then the chairs pulled out, you know. You know. No, I love your show when I need to sleep. You know, it's just all.

[Jimmy Kimmel]

I was at a dinner at Martin Short's house one night with Rickles and his wife Barbara.

[Dana Carvey]

Oh, my God.

[Jimmy Kimmel]

And they're sitting there and this is something I say to my wife a lot now because it made such an impression on me. Rickles is trying to. He's. He's telling a story that his wife Barbara has heard thousands of times, you know, and she would. She would just kind of fill in the blank. Like, he'd be like. And then. And she'd be like, vinny Boomba. And he's like, vinny Boomba, you know, whatever. And he got a thing. And she had had enough of these stories. I mean, she had heard them too many times. And. And he said something. And she looks over him, she goes, talk, talk, talk. And she does a little hand motion. He's talking, talk, talk. He goes, talk, talk, talk, talk, talk, talk. Without talk, talk, talk. You'd be a derelict. I say that to my wife sometimes, but, hey, you'd be a derelict.

[David Spade]

Such a perfect word. Johnny, Johnny, your wife. Alexis, you're gonna pass away one day. And she'll be like, too bad about Johnny. I'll take the red dress. Yeah, she's out spending your money, Johnny. Do you understand?

[Jimmy Kimmel]

We went out too late.

[David Spade]

Explains.

[Jimmy Kimmel]

We went out to dinner one night at Craig's where Don Rickel, you know, like, everybody.

[Dana Carvey]

The hangout place.

[Jimmy Kimmel]

Yeah. And at the end of the night, you know, he was fragile. He was. He was in his 80s at the time. At the end of the night, these two bus boys come over, two Mexican guys, and. To help him up. And they help him up, and he stands up and he. He gives them each $20 and he goes, here, buy your mother a house.

[Dana Carvey]

Regis Philvin used to open for him. And Regis said, honest to God, some nights you don't know if he's gonna make it out there. He gets two high balls in him. He's rubbing his knees. They're playing the trumpet. Sometimes it doesn't happen. Rubbing his knees as he goes out.

[Jimmy Kimmel]

Relate to that.

[Dana Carvey]

Honest to God. That was Regis. That was his phrase. Honest to God. I gotta tell you, that's beautiful.

[Jimmy Kimmel]

He goes.

[David Spade]

He shows. He goes in the crowd. His friends are upstairs in your hotel room stealing all your stuff. And then it's. They cut. It's like Quincy Jones going, my friend, because he's still. There was a lapse there where he was doing those jokes a little too late in the game. And it was like during the Oscars, something. And I'm like, wait a second.

[Dana Carvey]

I don't have the band. All. And with that trumpet and his theme, every time when he came out, you know, was a very cool thing.

[Jimmy Kimmel]

When he come on my show, he'd look around at the band and we have a, you know, a Japanese guitar player and two, you know, Mexican guy, you know. So he'd go right into it. And it was funny because I think the first time he was on the show, it got big laughs. And as the years went on, people became more sensitive. And you Know, nobody in the band cared. They all thought it was funny. But then there's the same jokes every freaking time. But you know, it. After a while, it became like, I just knew that what we're going to have to do, he was going to come out, he was going to do those racist jokes. I was going to edit all of those, that whole top of the segment out, and I would just take a beat, let him do all those jokes, and I'd say, how are you? That's hard tv.

[David Spade]

Yeah. You have to tell me, the other day when you were talking to Kate Beckinsale, is this a joke with the. With the eggs? I didn't get.

[Jimmy Kimmel]

There was not a joke.

[David Spade]

I didn't hear the end of it. And I was like, is something going on I don't know about?

[Jimmy Kimmel]

Well, what happened was Kate Beckinsales.

[David Spade]

Jody, I don't think Dana knows.

[Dana Carvey]

Yeah, I don't know. I'm hearing the story.

[Jimmy Kimmel]

So Kate Beckinsale, the actor from England, very, very beautiful, obviously, also very funny. Like, kind of weird, you know, and, like, funny, like in a way you wouldn't expect. Her daughter's boyfriend laid a couple of eggs, not in the same night, over the course of a few weeks. An egg, which I saw a photograph of, and it looked. It looked like a yellow egg. It was hard to tell.

[David Spade]

This could possibly be a big story if it's true.

[Jimmy Kimmel]

It could be a big story. And I still haven't gotten to the bottom of it, but something that looked like an egg came out of his intestines. And she showed me a picture of it. It was pretty gross. It was hard to tell what the size was because there was no point of reference. It wasn't like somebody's hand was in there, but it looked like an egg. And then it happened again a few weeks later. And they don't know what it was. They don't know why it happened. And they ruled out sexual play as a cause of it. They. They don't know what it was. He didn't swallow a whole egg. It was perplexing to all of them.

[David Spade]

The first thing would be maybe something was up up there. And then ultimately came out.

[Jimmy Kimmel]

My guess is it was some kind of gelatinous mass that accumulated in his body.

[David Spade]

Sickening. This is not the fun ending. Where.

[Dana Carvey]

Where is the world gone? I mean, really, where has gone? So I understand there was a. Johnny would love that in your rectum. You hear about that edge.

[David Spade]

Because the story was like 20 minutes. I'm like, get to the part where you're joking. I'm like, where is this going?

[Jimmy Kimmel]

This was not a joke. It was. You know what? It was really, for me, I wanted to hear the whole. So that after we put it on YouTube, somebody would solve the mystery.

[David Spade]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. What happened?

[Jimmy Kimmel]

No, I forgot about it. I didn't bother to look.

[David Spade]

I'm gonna look. Because I was going. I used to know her a little bit. I'm like, I do know she does jokes and stuff, but that one, it was too. It wasn't really a joke because she was going too long.

[Jimmy Kimmel]

I'm like, well, there was a picture of it, too. So.

[David Spade]

Right. And that's where I started to go. Okay. I jumped out. But I go, I'm gonna just wait.

[Jimmy Kimmel]

And ask Jimmy now if Kate Beckinsale fabricated that photograph, which was disgusting, by the way, I even more credit. Because that's an extreme.

[David Spade]

That she went to extreme Kaufman like, situation.

[Jimmy Kimmel]

Yeah, yeah, that's something. That's something a little extra special. But I do think it's interesting when David, you say things like. Yeah, I used. I knew her a little bit, and it makes me think, oh, what did you do to her? David Spade?

[David Spade]

No, we used to be friends.

[Dana Carvey]

Yeah. What do you mean, know her? I don't really know. A little bit.

[David Spade]

No, I. Same thing as you. I'd see her out and she was always saying, like, very sharp, like, mean, funny comments.

[Dana Carvey]

Right.

[David Spade]

She was like, I have a sense of humor, too, even though I'm really pretty. So. But that was fine. But she would do jokes on my Instagram and stuff like that, you know, like, I see. Make fun of me. That was it. But I have more questions for you. That's not over yet, Jimmy. Okay. Do you have any interest in three one Atlas? In three one Atlas, the big monster spaceship coming to America. That's supposed to be a comet.

[Jimmy Kimmel]

I don't know anything about it.

[David Spade]

You don't, Jimmy, but I'm now interested.

[Jimmy Kimmel]

It's coming specifically to America, or it might hit any part of the. Of the planet.

[David Spade]

I thought you knew about this 3:1 atlas, which. This should be most of your monologue. It is a comet, okay? And a lot of people from NASA, a lot of people are saying that it doesn't look like a comet. They think it's a spaceship. Oh, and it's on its way. And when it goes around the sun, they'll know more about it. They said, okay, that was about a month ago. And they said, it doesn't do anything a comet does. It slows down. It speeds up. It zigzags they're like, this could be the mothership. And so it is sort of a story, but it. Does it look like scientific community? There's a few people that sort of went along with it.

[Dana Carvey]

So what if it's the egg up the butt?

[David Spade]

You're not connected.

[Dana Carvey]

I'm gonna text Kate. That'd be great. Beckinsale, right now. Just because the egg thing and the rocket ship. Let's see what she says.

[Jimmy Kimmel]

Yeah, see what she says about that. I. You know what, David? I. You have my curiosity piqued. I did not know about 31 Atlas.

[David Spade]

I did have lazy writers. They might know.

[Jimmy Kimmel]

I did have a long conversation about UFOs with my guest, Paul Anka, who is very into UFOs.

[Dana Carvey]

Paul Anka, the. The. The singer.

[Jimmy Kimmel]

The singer.

[David Spade]

Watching his thing last night.

[Jimmy Kimmel]

My Way.

[Dana Carvey]

Yeah.

[David Spade]

Yeah.

[Jimmy Kimmel]

Oh, his. Yeah, he watched his documentary last night. Yeah, he. He's really into UFOs. And, you know, we discussed various theories, like, including that they all are under the sea, that that's where they.

[David Spade]

I think a lot of them come from. The ocean. Yeah.

[Jimmy Kimmel]

Now, are you a UFO guy, David?

[David Spade]

Yeah, sort of. I mean, just for something to do to seem interesting.

[Jimmy Kimmel]

Dana, are you.

[Dana Carvey]

I'm more. I. I like astrophysics. Like, I like, you know, what are the odds that the Earth exists and that we're on it? I guess right now it's 2 trillion to 1. So they're looking for seeding, which would be 2001 A Space Odyssey, because the bacteria, how it got here, the oceans came from comets, and how it was all stacked. It's 2 trillion to one that we're here. And that fascinate me.

[David Spade]

Yeah, well, yeah, because I think we are here.

[Dana Carvey]

I just blew his mind, man.

[Jimmy Kimmel]

Yeah, you did. I mean, I really didn't realize.

[David Spade]

These are the same odds as the jets winning the Super Bowl. Hire me. I'll fill out that monologue.

[Dana Carvey]

Boom, boom, let's. Writers.

[David Spade]

Does Molly ever watch you. Molly's Jimmy's wife. Reading your jokes in the morning, and you scratch one out and she goes, well, what's wrong with that one?

[Jimmy Kimmel]

We do have some things like that. But I will tell you, and she'll be horrified that I told you the story. She was very mad at you once because she won't wrote a bit that you liked for the show. And you're a guest on the show.

[Dana Carvey]

Okay.

[Jimmy Kimmel]

And they worked on it for a long time, and you seem to be into it in the. In the dressing room. And you guys, like, kind of worked it out the Whole thing. And then once you got on the air, you looked at whatever the piece of paper like, this is not funny. I'm not gonna do it.

[David Spade]

No way.

[Jimmy Kimmel]

They were going wild backstage. Like, God, when I was the host. Yeah. No, when you're a guest on the show. Yeah, when you're a guest.

[Dana Carvey]

Really?

[Jimmy Kimmel]

Yeah.

[David Spade]

What an. Yeah, they sound like me, but plus I like Molly.

[Jimmy Kimmel]

It sounds so much like you. It sounds.

[David Spade]

Molly helped me when I did the one where. Where I was the talent coordinator and Julie Bone was there and I was the new talent coordinator.

[Jimmy Kimmel]

Yeah.

[David Spade]

I was asking her interviewing her pre interview that I liked. I thought that was funny.

[Jimmy Kimmel]

All right, I'll tell her. I'll let her know.

[David Spade]

And she helped me with that.

[Jimmy Kimmel]

But she's over it. She's over it. But it was.

[David Spade]

You know, I love that story because I don't know what it is. And when you tell me and then I realize it's true and I find out more, I'll be like, oh, yeah, yeah. What a prima donna.

[Jimmy Kimmel]

Well, it's. You know what? It's. When you have that kind of talent, you're. You're entitled to be a prima donna from time to time.

[David Spade]

Well, I, I think the only problem would have been. I think I wasn't good in or something. I was like, I could not. Sometimes stuff gets written for me, even on the old show. And I'd be like, I don't think I can pull this off.

[Dana Carvey]

Like, it's good.

[David Spade]

I'm just not as good in it as I thought I'd be. Something.

[Jimmy Kimmel]

Yeah, we saw that play out in.

[David Spade]

Real time can kill you. You're not supposed to go along with what I say. I'm a super talent.

[Dana Carvey]

It's all. It all sounds very logical. Have you. What are the people who've sat in that chair, man or woman, where the charisma or their beauty or whatever that was just vibrating a little, almost like distracting.

[Jimmy Kimmel]

Oh yeah, that does happen from time to time. It is interesting. Yeah. Some people just like have this thing and the audience just gets wild. Like first of all, when there's a good looking guy, especially a young guy on the show, good looking guy, you look around the audience, you realize, oh, half of these women think they might him like they're here to potentially be pulled out of this audience to be fucked by this guy.

[David Spade]

Yeah.

[Jimmy Kimmel]

And they. And I think that's a. That's something that only women have. Like that thought. Like we never, like we wouldn't show up to see Gal Gadotin think like she's gonna pull me out of the audience.

[David Spade]

They rarely, like, stop at a commercial and go, this is a little unorthodox, but this gorgeous woman in the fourth row, could she come backstage with me right now?

[Dana Carvey]

And you're like, the main tell of this is like, women will chase teen idols. Like, obviously the Beatles chasing them. But you never see men chasing a woman.

[Jimmy Kimmel]

No, because they'd be arrested.

[Dana Carvey]

Exactly.

[Jimmy Kimmel]

You know, they would be arrested. And if they are chasing them, they're probably gay. I mean, let's be honest. You know, let's be honest.

[Dana Carvey]

Let's be honest.

[David Spade]

Let's be honest about everything. I get it. Because sometimes when we were on snl, by the way, this isn't really even an SNL podcast anymore. We do whatever. But when we were on there and you would meet a host, when I saw, like, Sharon Stone, even Alec Baldwin's first time in the meeting, I would think to myself, this person is a movie star. Like, this has star quality. They're great looking, they sound cool. The way they walk in. And there's some I thought were just flatlining. Here's a list. I'm kidding. But there's some where you go. I don't even get this at all.

[Dana Carvey]

I don't know. You remember that, David, where it's. The host has come in on Monday, and they come to your office and they go, robert Mitchum would like to meet you.

[David Spade]

Like, what?

[Dana Carvey]

Charlton Heston is down there. You're just walking, you open the door, and then you're meeting these iconic people. It's just very surreal.

[Jimmy Kimmel]

I would say that the best answer to that question is probably Oprah, who.

[Dana Carvey]

Yeah, I could see that.

[Jimmy Kimmel]

I didn't get the whole Oprah thing for much of my life. In fact, I did a show called the man show that was designed specifically to counteract Oprah. And my ex wife would watch Oprah. And then I'd walk in, I come home from work, and she'd be yelling at me for something she saw on Oprah. And I was like, who is this Oprah? Why is she ruining my life? Like, it was. It became personal with me. And. And. But when she. You know, I think that we did the show for like, 10 years before we had her on the show. And I was like, oh, wow, I get it now. Because she was like. She just was a presence. It was almost a religious experience for everyone there. And she was so. She understood what she was to everybody, and she gave them that thing. And she. Like, we had. I think we shot a bit with Oprah, that was a really, really funny bit. It started at 5 o' clock in the morning and it went till very late at night. It was an all, it was more than an all day thing. It was a whole bunch of setups and we. And the day started with Oprah in my bathtub, in my dressing room. Like that's, that's how the day started. So we spent the whole day together. And then, you know, you'd expect after a 17 hour day that Oprah would hightail it the fuck out of there, but instead, Oprah got a bottle or a couple of bottles of very expensive tequila and she gathered everyone on the crew and everyone together and gathered around and gave this beautiful toast to everyone and then took pictures with everyone. And then, then, and only then when she had like interacted with every single person there, did she get in the car and leave. And I was like, now I understand.

[David Spade]

Some people get that they're a big deal and they, this is the only time people see them and they make it like a nice thing.

[Jimmy Kimmel]

Yeah, yeah. Some people really understand that. And I've had experiences in my life before I was on television where I've, I've met people and who meant a lot to me and then didn't. Then they were always cordial or whatever. But when you don't get that kind of like you don't get warmth back, you don't get anything really back. It's. It's disappointing. And, you know, I always feel like I never want to be that, that person who disappoints.

[Dana Carvey]

There is a force field. There was an actress, I was doing some Tom Hanks. Anyway, long story short, and I was approaching the table, there were other people and I just wanted to say hello. And I just saw the radar come up, like, and I sort of, I just waved, you know, because there are, certain people are so famous that they're. It's exhausting for. I just got to tell you, you know, it's like you meet Paul McCartney. I'm sure you've met him several times. I just got to tell you what you meant to me. Yeah. And it's hard. I mean, I saw Jimmy, I met Jimmy Stewart and at an event, you know, afi Kirk Douglas salute. And I got. I was young, I just had been on SNL for a few months and. And I walked over to Jimmy Stewart and he grabbed my hand and he just said, I know, I know.

[David Spade]

Wow. I mean, so much.

[Dana Carvey]

But that's what I learned about show business. Around the table. People are talking, you know, and they kind of said, yeah, Jimmy Stewart not working much anymore. And I go, then you can't win. Show business.

[Jimmy Kimmel]

Yeah, there's no winning.

[Dana Carvey]

He's 83. I'm not getting a nah.

[David Spade]

Someone goes, is he still in the business? And you go, yeah.

[Dana Carvey]

Oh, my.

[David Spade]

Oh, yeah. It's tough. If you see people come up, they're a little nervous, they got their phone, and you just skip the middle part and you go, you want to take a picture? It sounds so cocky, but it is what they want. But they're just. It takes the eight minutes in the middle out.

[Jimmy Kimmel]

So I had a guy, I had a kid who was, like, looking at me, and he had his phone, and I was like. I was at. I just had like a hockey rink or something, and I just see him doing it, and I was just like, hey, you want to take a picture? He's like, what? I said, do you want to take a picture? He goes, no, you just. You got. You have mustard all over your face.

[Dana Carvey]

I know.

[Jimmy Kimmel]

I was like, oh, okay.

[Dana Carvey]

But I did go back to Jimmy Stewart after the dinner was over, and. And he goes, well, you already already said hello to me. What the do you want from me?

[David Spade]

Jesus.

[Dana Carvey]

I go, God, it's a Wonderful Life knot. I just did that for Jimmy Stewart. Swearing.

[David Spade]

When you go to, like, one of these parties, it's kind of show busy. And then you see someone, you're like. You do partially. Part of you wants them to, like, somewhat or know what you do. And when they don't, it's such a blank stare. It's like, oh, I mean, it's nice to meet them, but you kind of wish they saw something I did on TBS at some point on a rerun and said, yeah, hey, weren't you some guy in some stupid shit?

[Jimmy Kimmel]

It is funny what you don't want. Like, you're like, oh, I don't want to be bothered. I don't want to put it in there. You're like, oh, you know. You know who I am, right?

[Dana Carvey]

Dude?

[David Spade]

It's like everyone in the DMV line talks to you. And then you get up to the lady and she doesn't know you, and she's like, this isn't going to work. And I'm like, don't. Like, you should be the one that's fawning over me to help me, but the one person that matters doesn't give a fat fuck. And they're like, yeah, back of the line. Start over. I'm like, my God, dang it.

[Jimmy Kimmel]

Yeah, I'm Most embarrassed. Most ashamed of myself when I start dropping things in front of my kids friends, you know, like, oh, look at. Look at who texted me. Olivia. Rodrigo.

[David Spade]

That is a good one. You go to someone younger, you're like, oh, I guess we got Sydney Sweeney on the show tonight. Yawn. And they're like, she's coming in. Yeah, yawn. You add that. No, it's I. We all sound like assholes.

[Dana Carvey]

You know, David, people keep asking about my 2026 Resolute resources.

[David Spade]

Yes, they do. I want one of them. You. I know what you're trying to say. The people keep asking about your 2026 resolutions. And I've got the usual ones. Read more or read at all.

[Dana Carvey]

Hit the gym.

[David Spade]

At the gym. Learn how to crochet, get the knitting needles on.

[Dana Carvey]

Really?

[David Spade]

Yeah. But this year, the goal at the very top of my list is simple. Get comfy. I've learned that from Adam. Yeah, and that's exactly where Bombas comes in. They're bringing next level comfort to my everyday essentials. Take the new Bombas sports socks. They're designed with sport specific comfort for everything from running, hiking, golf. That's what I do.

[Dana Carvey]

Skiing.

[David Spade]

And I know you want to get back into running.

[Dana Carvey]

I would really want to get back into running, honestly. For sure. I do a lot of hiking.

[David Spade]

Yeah, they're cushioned right where you need it most. Sweat wicking.

[Dana Carvey]

That's good.

[David Spade]

Is that good?

[Dana Carvey]

Yeah, it keeps the sweat away. Packed with tech that keeps you comfortable and locked in. So comfy socks. It's a great idea. Yep.

[David Spade]

So for every day around the house resolutions, Bombas has the comfiest footwear imaginable. I've been living in their Sherpa Sunday slippers for things like weekend resets when I'm spring cleaning when I'm just doing this and that around the house. Honestly, they look very squishy. And you wouldn't know this, but it's.

[Dana Carvey]

Like walking on clouds underneath it all. Bombas underwear and T shirts. Yeah, David. They're flexible, breathable, and buttery smooth. Plus, for every item you buy, one is donated to someone facing housing insecurity.

[David Spade]

Head over to bamas.com flywall and use code flywall for 20 off your first purchase. That's B O M b-s.com flywall code flywall at checkout.

[Dana Carvey]

Here's a hot tip for 2026. Filing your taxes with TurboTax. That's right. Instead of juggling forms and receipts while you track down a tax appointment, you can hand everything off to your dedicated TurboTax full service expert. They'll take it from there to handle your taxes for you entirely. You simply upload your tax documents and your expert works through your return with one goal. Getting you the best possible tax outcome.

[David Spade]

You're never left wondering what's going on. You can get real time updates from your expert right on your phone, all while you go about your day. You can also get unlimited help at no extra cost, even on nights, weekends, during tax season. It's a totally modern way to get your taxes done, giving you the confidence you deserve every step of the way. Intuit TurboTax. Now this is taxes. Visit TurboTax.com today only. Available with TurboTax full service experts. Real time updates only in the iOS mobile app. Keep going, Danny.

[Dana Carvey]

You had.

[David Spade]

We had. Before we let him go. No, we got you five minutes.

[Dana Carvey]

Are you. Yeah. Like, who's your closest friend in show business?

[David Spade]

Yeah.

[Dana Carvey]

Or one of the closest you seem to be. You're very social.

[Jimmy Kimmel]

Jesus doesn't counts.

[Dana Carvey]

Yeah.

[Jimmy Kimmel]

Who's my closest?

[Dana Carvey]

Is there a kind of a posse with Jennifer Aniston and you and Jason Bateman and there's a group of friends.

[Jimmy Kimmel]

I had dinner with them all last night.

[Dana Carvey]

Seriously?

[David Spade]

Did you see them all at Tower Bar?

[Jimmy Kimmel]

Yes, with Paul Anka. And it's funny what we were just talking about a second ago, because Cyndi Lauper happened to be there and she came up to the table and we were excited to see her. She drove all night and Paul was happy to see her. And Paul said, hey, you know, I covered time after time on one of my albums. And she had no idea. She's like, you did? He said, yeah, I did. And then he said, I'll send it to you. And she goes, I'll look it up.

[Dana Carvey]

I owe that guy five grand. I owe Paul.

[David Spade]

What did you do?

[Dana Carvey]

Kevin Pollock had a birthday party in Vegas. We had a room playing blackjack. I'm terrible. Paul Anka comes in. I have $500 I'm gonna spend. He sits next to me and he starts coaching me in blackjack. You gotta whack it, whack it, split it, whack it, whack it. Within a half hours, up to five grand. Yeah, I did it my way. But I've never publicly thanked Paul Anka.

[Jimmy Kimmel]

Well, I feel like you should. You should get to keep some of that, shouldn't you? Since it was your money that you.

[David Spade]

Took it and walked away.

[Dana Carvey]

But he was kind of brilliant at. I bet he's probably banned from the tables or something.

[David Spade]

I don't know, in that documentary he's in Vegas all the time.

[Jimmy Kimmel]

Yeah, he spent. He lived in Vegas for a very long time.

[David Spade]

It was very cool to hear him talk. I mean, My Way is obviously a huge one. I was thinking, what is Sinatra's most well known hit? Is It My Way New York, New York or other?

[Dana Carvey]

I think it's. I could talk about him all night.

[Jimmy Kimmel]

In the Night and Strangers in the Night. It's got to be My way.

[David Spade]

It.

[Jimmy Kimmel]

It's my Way.

[Dana Carvey]

Okay. Can I just as fan out for a second?

[Jimmy Kimmel]

Yeah.

[Dana Carvey]

You know late night and car stereos are nuts. Right. Got you. Under My Skin is so brilliant. And the way he sings and the lyrics. And also the moon, the summer wind. Summer wind is going through it. You know he died in my arms. You know that story, right?

[Jimmy Kimmel]

Frank Sinatra died in your arms?

[Dana Carvey]

I was in Cedar Sinai getting a stent in those days. And then there was this hubbub. I was just reading a magazine, it was like midnight to go. Frank Sinatra just checked in and he was in the room next to me. They took him down the ICU and he passed away that night. Wow.

[David Spade]

But before that in your arms?

[Dana Carvey]

Well, before that I just snuck out of my room and kind of knocked and go, you know, we had a moment.

[Jimmy Kimmel]

Did you sing that's Life?

[David Spade]

I just want to tell you, you should take a selfie. But it was like too late.

[Jimmy Kimmel]

Would you mind, Mr. Sinatra?

[David Spade]

I just have to tell you just real quick.

[Dana Carvey]

I just gotta tell you. I gotta tell you.

[David Spade]

I gotta. I like to go the facts. Not just checked in like it's a hotel.

[Dana Carvey]

Oh well. It was just sort of surreal.

[David Spade]

Right? Just like how crazy.

[Dana Carvey]

I know. Why was I there that night when he was.

[David Spade]

Everyone's got stories like I had a bunch of nobodies.

[Dana Carvey]

Have you ever had a poltergeist? You ever had a out of body ghost experience? Jimmy?

[Jimmy Kimmel]

Me? It's weird you say that with. When you're talking about hospitals because the reason. No, I haven't and the reason I don't believe in ghosts is because I feel that if there was such a thing, there would be hundreds of thousands of them in every hospital because that's where people die. And it would just be like you wouldn't be able to get into the elevator. There would be so many ghosts. And yet I've never seen or even heard a report of a ghost at a hospital.

[David Spade]

Yeah. Theory.

[Jimmy Kimmel]

Yeah. Have you?

[David Spade]

We just cracked a story about this.

[Dana Carvey]

I. I had a way either a waking dream state, but we. I was the San Ysidro Ranch Hotel with my wife in the 80s. So just go to sleep. And then I feel this pressure pulling me back in the mattress.

[David Spade]

Like, pushing on you in the middle of the night.

[Dana Carvey]

Pushing down on me. What the. So I get up, I use the restroom. I'm adrenalized. Like, what a weird dream. I just assumed intellectually I was in a waking dream state. Yeah, sleep paralysis, they call it. And then when I went back in, I thought I was as awake as I am right now. And then it started again, and it was aggressive and it was pounding and holding me back, and I was, like, really flipped out. So middle of the night, 3am, my wife's asleep. This is why we've been married a long time. I tapped her on the shoulder and I said, we gotta leave. And she said okay. She didn't even ask why.

[Jimmy Kimmel]

No explanation.

[Dana Carvey]

Well, then I explained it to her. And there was a painting of a little girl with curly red hair on a tricycle from like 1880. That flipped me out. Nope. And we left. And then it was. It was a stormy night, and there was either a rat or some kind of animal on the road. And so anyway, that happened to me. And I just talked to someone recently who had the same paralysis, but then when they got up to go to the bathroom, they were standing and the thing was pushing against them. Wow. Wow. It's just sort of. I don't have an explanation for it, but it never left me as far as just like, what the.

[Jimmy Kimmel]

Wow. Yeah. No, I've never had anything. Nothing ever happened.

[Dana Carvey]

Pressure on this podcast. Like, you can't get out. You've already done a 14 hour day. You feel like, David.

[Jimmy Kimmel]

What if I learned that you guys are ghosts? And I just sat here for an hour with two ghosts?

[Dana Carvey]

I just go to, how. How do we get here? Why are we here? What's going on here? So then I sort of opens my mind, like, what the. What are we doing here?

[Jimmy Kimmel]

Here it is. Yeah. I don't know if there's an answer, though. I. I feel like.

[David Spade]

But aliens.

[Jimmy Kimmel]

We're just here. Yeah. Maybe we came on the earlier comet.

[David Spade]

What's under the pyramids? Go.

[Jimmy Kimmel]

Dirt.

[David Spade]

Okay, you got that one right. That was lucky.

[Jimmy Kimmel]

Okay.

[Dana Carvey]

I would say Walt Disney's head is underneath the pyramids.

[David Spade]

No, I have a lot of pyramid talk. I'm gonna save it.

[Dana Carvey]

He's a UFO pyramid guy.

[David Spade]

I' I think the pyramids go down deep. And I think there's things down there, and they. They're kind of like antennas. I don't know.

[Dana Carvey]

It's all weird.

[David Spade]

It's just something to do. It's better than drugs.

[Dana Carvey]

Can I just mention very quickly before we wrap up, which is we're living in a science fiction world and that these giant companies are building these data centers to get super intelligence that will supposedly solve cancer and energy. And so we're in the middle of this thing that is like a science fiction movie movie. And the energy they need and how vast it is and the. I mean, what?

[Jimmy Kimmel]

Yeah, well, yeah, we're in a lot of trouble. There's no question about it. Hopefully the. All the energy that AI needs, hopefully AI will figure out how to provide all the energy that it needs. And if it is something that we should all fear, it probably will figure that out for itself. But in the meantime, time, it's not great for people who like to have their air conditioner on in the summer.

[Dana Carvey]

Right.

[Jimmy Kimmel]

Isn't it weird that I never thought about, like, the idea that it took power to do any of this stuff? Like, I was like, what power is this? I'm writing in, like, give me a synonym for Cheerios. And, you know, coming back with a list of them. This is what I use it as a thesaurus. And then there's some data center somewhere that is. That requires a drained amount of energy to do all this. Who knew?

[Dana Carvey]

Yes, you go on Sora. I. I have Sora Pro. You make up a video, it goes all the way to a data center, and then it gets inside the data center and the GPUs, all the chips, and there's inference, which makes it intelligent. And that's where it's exponentially going to increase trees. Anyway, I find it fascinating. A little scary, but, yeah, they need energy.

[Jimmy Kimmel]

They need so much, so much smarter than I imagined. Especially when lined up right next to David.

[David Spade]

I mean, I'm about the same as what you thought.

[Jimmy Kimmel]

Yeah. You know.

[David Spade]

Yeah.

[Jimmy Kimmel]

A little less. There's a little less. But.

[Dana Carvey]

Well, this is a Christmas theme. I didn't want to bring it up, but he's green and I'm red, and it's sort of our own little joke.

[David Spade]

There's Dana's tree behind him.

[Jimmy Kimmel]

Oh, I like that.

[Dana Carvey]

You have to have a plant when you do your podcast. You got to have a fake plan.

[Jimmy Kimmel]

You do have to have one. And Dana, I know. David, I noticed you have a little rocket ship behind you. Is that representative of your UFO fascination?

[David Spade]

I don't think so. I think we just rotate things around back there, and I see they're just general. There's props so, yeah, there's books.

[Dana Carvey]

He's got a cool set. I. Here's my last question.

[David Spade]

Yeah. Okay.

[Dana Carvey]

What's your next. When we go. Goodbye, Jimmy. What's your next one hour like?

[David Spade]

Yeah. Where do you go? Podcast.

[Jimmy Kimmel]

I will go change out of this suit. I will take it off my suit.

[Dana Carvey]

Yep.

[Jimmy Kimmel]

I will take a bath. I will go home.

[Dana Carvey]

Okay.

[Jimmy Kimmel]

I live about 15 minutes away.

[Dana Carvey]

Nice.

[Jimmy Kimmel]

And I will catch my kids before they go to sleep. And then my son will demand that I lay with him, which he makes me do each night. And I will lay with him in bed until he falls asleep. Usually I fall asleep before he does, and then I have to wake back up and go do my homework, which is kind of miserable. But he's eight years old. He still likes me to lay in bed with him until he falls asleep. And even though we feel he's too old for that, we love it. So we don't want to, you know, we don't really want it to stop.

[Dana Carvey]

I think eight is fine. I think 18. We could talk.

[David Spade]

I did it probably nine.

[Dana Carvey]

Eight is fine. You know, Love them up. Do you read books to them? And we do.

[Jimmy Kimmel]

We are. Well, we read children's books, but also we've been reading. We are. We just finished book four of Harry Potter, which I'd not read before war.

[Dana Carvey]

Right.

[Jimmy Kimmel]

And. And that, That's. That's fun. That's my daughter, my son and I. That's our. Our thing. And then at the end of each book, we will watch the movie.

[Dana Carvey]

And then what? Oh, yeah. I mean, Harry Potter is. Is brilliant for what it is. And it's generational now. So when do you actually go lights out? Like, what. Can you get asleep after all this stimulation? Like by 9:30 or 10? Kind of.

[Jimmy Kimmel]

No, I'll go to better later in that. Usually right around 11:30 or so. Last night, I think I was up till 12:30 because we went out to dinner. But yeah, I'll get to bed. I don't, you know, I. I like to stay up. Left to my own devices, I would be up until 4 o' clock in the morning every night.

[David Spade]

Oh, really?

[Jimmy Kimmel]

And I'd wake up at noon, but it's not realistic for me.

[Dana Carvey]

So you're nocturnal?

[Jimmy Kimmel]

I am, yeah.

[Dana Carvey]

Genetically, yeah.

[Jimmy Kimmel]

I think just like I have a loud Italian family. And it was the only time it was quiet in the house was late at night after everyone had gone to sleep. So that was my, like my time to watch Letterman and just kind of stay up and work on little projects.

[Dana Carvey]

That's John Travolta's thing is the world stops and it's very quiet. And he's nocturnal. I think he's up pretty much all night and then sleeps.

[Jimmy Kimmel]

I'm actually up with John Travolta that time. Together.

[Dana Carvey]

Yeah.

[Jimmy Kimmel]

Talking about flying planes.

[Dana Carvey]

You know, Jimmy Kimmel comes over and, you know, we spoon a little bit, but there's nothing going on. We just like being up late at night together. That's him from 1975.

[Jimmy Kimmel]

Guy. That's. That's my John Travolta right there.

[Dana Carvey]

Yeah. Wow.

[Jimmy Kimmel]

Him and Vinnie Barbarino.

[Dana Carvey]

Yeah. And you know, Pulp Fiction, I. You just love, love that guy. And he's the nicest celebrity I've ever met of a superstar.

[Jimmy Kimmel]

He is very nice. Yeah. Yeah, he's super nice. Yeah. You know, most of them are. You know, most. I mean, I'm sure, like, everybody's got their things, but I have this. I've kind of. Over the years, I just kind of go like, oh, okay. Well, even if he is pretending to be nice, he's pretending to be nice. And that's being nice. That is actually being nice.

[Dana Carvey]

Yeah.

[David Spade]

I agree that it's a good way to look at it.

[Jimmy Kimmel]

Like that maniac Tom Cruise, he come. He was on our show and it was one of these things like, Tom has to be out of here at 6:04. If Tom. If goes one second over 604, you are, you know, he will never be. You know, they were very, very, very. We're like, okay, don't worry, we're gonna be. Now Tom being Tom Cruise seems to have no idea of this and decides to go into the audience and greet every single person in the audience, which they are over the moon about. They are absolutely out of their minds with joy. But it takes, you know, a very long time. And it turns out whatever that deadline line was wasn't so hard after all.

[David Spade]

Wow. They.

[Dana Carvey]

They.

[David Spade]

They're all scared of their job. I've seen that all over the place. And then the actual person goes, I don't even know what you're talking about.

[Jimmy Kimmel]

Yeah, right.

[Dana Carvey]

Yeah. That seems so. Tom Cruise.

[Jimmy Kimmel]

Yeah.

[Dana Carvey]

Meet every person. I mean, the drive of this guy is just my. I mean, I will go to every movie. He's hanging off the plane, he's holding his breath for six minutes. I mean, mean, you just go for the spectacle of what he's putting himself through physically to entertain you.

[Jimmy Kimmel]

Yeah. Now that I think about it, maybe the reason. Yes. Maybe it's all this being nice to everybody all the time. And greeting all these people. Maybe that is why he's trying to kill himself on film.

[David Spade]

Yeah. He's like an old school movie star. You don't really see him. And then when he comes out, he saves all his energy. And then he's super nice to everyone. The in, very energetic. And then he hides again because the old days we were talking, you didn't see Cary Grant on Tick Tock that much. You didn't see all these people. And then they were kind of stars and you saw their movie and then they disappeared and now it's everyone's everywhere.

[Dana Carvey]

They call him the last movie star, but he rejects the title. You know, I think you know, Brad Pitt this summer and Tom Cruise, it's kind of cool. Guys in the early 60s looking great, being action stars and still at the top of their game, you know.

[Jimmy Kimmel]

Yeah. Still hard as a rock in the sack.

[David Spade]

Yeah. I'm sorry.

[Jimmy Kimmel]

Oh, sorry. Did I say that?

[Dana Carvey]

Yeah, yeah. Muscular.

[David Spade]

We were all thinking it.

[Dana Carvey]

If you take a Tom Cruise and you take, you know, Brad Pitt in the musculature of the. And the, the abs and all the delta. Sorry.

[David Spade]

Jimmy, thank you for doing this after.

[Dana Carvey]

Your show and do this next hour and hang out with your son and thank you for coming on.

[Jimmy Kimmel]

If you like, I could just bring the zoom and we could just. I could try. We could. I could drive home with me. You could see what's going on there and maybe have always lots of laughs.

[David Spade]

We always crack up every time on your show. We crack up the whole time. So it's great to see you and thank you, buddy.

[Jimmy Kimmel]

It's great to see you guys.

[Dana Carvey]

Thank you.

[Jimmy Kimmel]

Jimmy are the best. And. And David, if I see you walking, talking. Yeah, I'm gonna pounce. So.

[David Spade]

Yeah, do a bit, dude.

[Jimmy Kimmel]

For sure.

[David Spade]

I'm so embarrassing in the real world. So just do something. It'll be for sure embarrassing to me. All right. Thanks, buddy. Hi, Dana. Nice to meet you.

[Dana Carvey]

Nice to meet you. Thanks for coming on my podcast.

[David Spade]

Hey, guys, if you're loving this podcast, which you are, be sure to click follow on your favorite podcast app, Give us review 5 star rating and maybe even share an episode that you've loved with a friend.

[Dana Carvey]

If you're watching this episode on YouTube, please subscribe. We're on video now.

[David Spade]

Fly on the Wall is presented by Odyssey and executive produced by Danny Carvey and David Spade, Heather Santoro and Greg Holtzman, Maddie Sprung Kaiser and Leah Reese Dennis of Odyssey.

[Dana Carvey]

Our senior producer is Greg Holtzman and the show is produced and edited by.

[David Spade]

Phil Sweet tech booking by Cultivated Entertainment.

[Dana Carvey]

Special thanks to Patrick Fogarty, Evan Cox, Maura Curran, Melissa Wester, Hillary Schuff, Eric Donnelly, Colin Gaynor, Sean Cherry, Kurt Courtney and Lauren Vieira.

[David Spade]

Reach out with us. Any questions be asked and answered on the show? You can email us at [e-mail] that's a U-A C-Y I dot com.