Focus on the Family with Jim Daly

Episode Summary: Clearing Out Your Space and Schedule (Part 1 of 2)

Air date: January 7, 2026
Host: Jim Daly and John Fuller
Guest: Courtney Ellis, author of Uncluttered: Free Your Space, Free Your Schedule, Free Your Soul

Episode Overview

This episode explores the struggles and spiritual significance of decluttering our homes, schedules, and digital lives, featuring author and pastor Courtney Ellis. Drawing on her personal journey and Christian principles, Courtney shares practical steps and heartfelt stories about making space for what matters most—especially our relationship with God and our families.

Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Understanding Clutter—Physical, Emotional, and Spiritual

00:31–04:57

• Hosts and listeners share relatable examples of clutter: social media overuse, messy rooms, overflowing car trash, and disorganized kitchens.
• Jim Daly reflects on laundry piles and acknowledges how “clutter” can be a metaphor for deeper issues.
• Courtney Ellis: Clutter accumulates gradually—"one pair of shoes at a time, one book at a time, one toy at a time" (03:43). She emphasizes the biblical call to “store up your treasures in heaven,” explaining how material possessions can distract us from God’s purposes.

Notable Quote

“Our possessions, little by little…can begin to take over. The more stuff we have, the more time we have to devote to caring for that stuff…And that takes away from time we could spend in a hundred other God ordained ways.”
—Courtney Ellis (03:43)

2. Personal Journey: From Overwhelmed to Free

05:20–07:18

• Courtney recounts moving from a big farmhouse to a small California condo, bringing too much stuff and feeling emotionally and physically suffocated.
• Panic attacks prompted her to recognize the need to address both “overstuffed stuff” and her “overstuffed schedule”.
• The first step: Stop acquiring—and “stop putting things on the calendar that weren’t absolutely essential” (06:36).

Notable Quote

“I just feel like it’s too much. And he [my husband] said, ‘What is too much?’ I said, ‘All of it. All of it is too much.’ The schedule, the amount that we’ve crammed into our life.”
—Courtney Ellis (06:27)

3. Practical Steps for Family Decluttering

07:18–10:16

• Decluttering with family, especially kids, can be tough: "You can't really go in and declutter your kids' rooms without their permission or that will be really rough" (07:18).
• Start with your own belongings and model generosity—give away toys to children in need, but have kids choose what to give.
• Decluttering is often more emotional than logical: every possession is tied to memories.
• The “giant table story”—letting go of a childhood table and seeing it bless another family (09:06–10:06).

Notable Quote

“It’s not even that it’s about me letting go of things. It’s about who else might be blessed by these I’ve been clinging to that don’t serve me.”
—Courtney Ellis (10:08)

4. The Spiritual and Emotional Drivers of Clutter

10:16–11:49

• Shopping and busyness can be ways people “medicate”—buying bargains or piling on activities for a sense of worth.
• Acknowledge and respect differences within a marriage: the “saver” and the “tosser” need to cooperate and compromise.

Notable Quote

“People medicate by shopping. But they also medicate by being busy. And those are two sides of the same [coin].”
—Courtney Ellis (10:57)

5. Technology as a Source of Clutter

13:28–17:48

• The rise of “digital clutter”: parents distracted by phones, children competing for attention.
• Courtney’s family solutions: “lockbox” for phones at dinner and bedtime, digital sabbath, and periodic breaks from social media.
• Emphasizes using technology as a tool rather than letting it control us.
• The importance of boredom and quiet for spiritual and creative health: “One of the healthiest things for the human brain is boredom and silence… But now we have waterproof phones. You could bring your phone in the shower!” (17:06-17:24)

Notable Moment

Courtney’s admission:

“There are thousands and thousands of engineers behind this screen that get paid if I click, if I scroll. Like, it’s not a fair fight.” (15:07)

6. The Overloaded Schedule and Sabbath

17:48–19:32

• Many wear “busy” as a badge of honor—a “humble brag.”
• Most overloaded schedules are self-inflicted: “You’re the boss…Why didn’t you say no?” (17:48)
• The gift of Sabbath: Rest is commanded, even with things left undone. Sabbath is for “rest, worship, pray, play.”

7. Learning to Say No—Stories and Scriptural Wisdom

19:37–22:39

• The Parakeet Story—saying “no” to taking a class pet home right before childbirth.
  • Wisdom in declining even good invitations for a higher purpose.
  • Sometimes “no” is for now—not forever.
  • Result: They cared for the parakeet later, then unexpectedly hosted it during the pandemic for 7 months!
• Jesus modeled boundaries—He knew His mission and pulled away to pray, showing busyness isn’t godliness.

Notable Quote

“Busyness helps us feel important…But the truth is that busyness often separates us from our neighbor. It separates us from God. It can separate us from our own spiritual need, our own spiritual hunger...” —Courtney Ellis (23:09)

8. Family Mission and Purpose

24:10–26:21

• Courtney and her husband’s premarital counselors challenged them: “How will you serve God better together than separately?”
• Their family’s mission: “provide opportunities for hospitality and respite and discipleship... Rest for the weary and meal for the hungry.”
• Clarity of mission makes it easier to set boundaries and say no.

Notable Moment

[Premarital counseling story; at 25:08]
“If you do not have an answer to this, we will not marry you… if you’re not going to serve God better together than separately, then God may not be calling you to marriage at this time.”
—Courtney Ellis (quoting her counselors)

Timestamps for Major Segments

| Timestamp | Topic | |-------------|------------------------------------------------------------------------| | 00:31 | Opening thoughts on clutter | | 03:43 | Spiritual implications of possessions | | 05:35 | Panic attacks and the impact of “too much” stuff | | 07:18 | Steps to begin decluttering as a family | | 08:56 | Emotional attachment—letting go of family heirlooms | | 10:16 | How “bargain hunting” and busyness function like medication | | 13:28 | Digital clutter and parenting challenges | | 15:54 | Practical tools for limiting digital distraction | | 17:06 | The loss of downtime—why boredom is spiritually healthy | | 17:48 | Overloaded schedules and the importance of Sabbath | | 19:49 | The parakeet story—learning to say no | | 22:39 | Jesus’ example: busyness ≠ godliness | | 24:56 | Premarital counseling and crafting a family mission |

Notable Quotes & Moments

• Courtney Ellis (03:43):
  “Our possessions, little by little, it’s always incrementally ... the more stuff we have, the more time we have to devote to caring for that stuff ... And that takes away from time we could spend in a hundred other God ordained ways.”
• Jim Daly (06:03):
  “A lot of people might ... discount that I can feel like I’m not breathing, but I don’t necessarily know why. And to connect that to your overstressed schedule, your clutter, all that. How did you make that connection?”
• Courtney Ellis (10:08):
  “It’s not even that it’s about me letting go of things. It’s about who else might be blessed by these I’ve been clinging to that don’t serve me.”
• John Fuller (17:48):
  “I think many of us, if I could say it, we wear it [busyness] as a badge of honor... It’s a humble brag. Aren’t I important?”
• Courtney Ellis (23:09):
  “Busyness helps us feel important...But the truth is that busyness often separates us from our neighbor. It separates us from God. It can separate us from our own spiritual need, our own spiritual hunger.”

Tone & Style

The conversation is lighthearted and relatable, full of gentle humor and personal anecdotes, yet it remains deeply practical and grounded in Christian teaching. Both hosts and Courtney are transparent about their own struggles, laugh at their mistakes, and offer grace-filled encouragement.

Conclusion

Takeaways:
Decluttering—be it your home, schedule, or digital life—isn’t merely a housekeeping activity; it’s an invitation to reorient your heart, invite God into your priorities, and build intentional space for what truly matters. Courtney’s biblical insights, candid stories, and family-tested strategies offer encouragement for anyone feeling overwhelmed by life’s excess.

Look ahead:
Part 2 will continue with practical advice and explore more topics from Courtney’s book, “Uncluttered: Free Your Space, Free Your Schedule, Free Your Soul.”