Forever35 Podcast: Episode 371
Title: The Dark Side of Beauty with Arabelle Sicardi
Hosts: Doree Shafrir & Elise Hu
Guest: Arabelle Sicardi (author, beauty writer)
Date: September 29, 2025
Episode Overview
This episode delves into the complex and often troubling aspects of the beauty industry with writer Arabelle Sicardi, whose new book House of Beauty explores beauty’s intersections with politics, labor, and care. The conversation weaves together history, personal anecdotes, and a candid discussion about the paradoxes of loving beauty amid its problematic realities. Listeners are encouraged to question their own role as consumers while being offered a nuanced, community-driven vision for the future of self care and beauty.
Key Discussion Points & Insights
Self Care, Habits, and Organization (02:01–11:02)
- Doree and Elise catch up on daily life:
- Elise talks about her daughter turning 13, celebrating with family hot pot and a special gift haul curated by celebrity makeup artist Rachel Goodwin (03:02).
- Doree reflects on a school talk about executive function, sharing actionable habits for kids and families, like using a checklist in luggage tags for backpack organization (05:55).
- Quote:
“One little thing that she suggested that I’m definitely gonna do...have a little checklist for what goes in your kid’s backpacks and have it in a luggage tag. I am also going to do this with my tennis bag.” — Doree (05:55)
- Both hosts discuss their own struggles and strategies with staying organized and supporting their kids’ routines (07:11–08:47).
Introducing Arabelle Sicardi (10:05–11:02)
- Background:
- Arabelle is described as a “beauty world builder” with bylines at major publications and founder of creative collectives. They run a scent-focused creative collective and a nonprofit arts foundation.
Interview with Arabelle Sicardi
Self Care Practices (12:28–14:15)
- Arabelle shares that “lifting weights,” Pilates, and swimming are essential for their mental health and sanity.
- Describes the contrasting gym experiences between New York (quirky, octogenarians) and LA (scene-y, influencer-filled).
Marriage and Personal Insights (14:40–17:20)
- Arabelle discusses their recent wedding, which was small, non-traditional, and heavily influenced by finding the perfect vintage Alexander McQueen dress on consignment in 2020.
- Quote:
“Wedding planning is a heterocentric nightmare. I’ve learned a lot about family dynamics and how valuable it is to delegate as much as possible to professionals.” — Arabelle (14:44)
- Emphasizes the value of keeping things personal, authentic, and non-performative.
Nails as Art and Community (17:15–18:36)
- Manicure inspired by their book cover; done by their go-to nail tech, Kisang, who features in the book.
- Manicures described as rituals of care and community.
The House of Beauty: Book Deep-Dive
The Dark Side of the Beauty Industry (20:32–21:35)
- Arabelle’s book investigates how the beauty industry is tangled with global politics, capitalism, and a “crisis of care.”
- Not a light read, but an unflinching look at the ugly aspects across the industry.
Grappling with Paradox (21:35–25:15)
- Quote:
“I can love something that I hate and hate something that I love. Both are true emotions and both are fair to have... It’s like shadow work. You must confront that which feels ugly or unresolved.” — Arabelle (22:19)
- Discusses the challenge of embracing beauty while acknowledging its exploitation and oppression.
- Highlights the lack of proper recognition for artists and laborers in beauty, emphasizing relationship-building and valuing their stories as key to reporting.
Structure and Chapters of House of Beauty (25:15–28:21)
- Book conceived as interconnected “rooms” in a house; themes cover:
- Global production and distribution of beauty products (“choose your own disaster”)
- The problematic legacy of Chanel and fragrance’s ties to fascism
- Nails, war, and Asian American immigration
- Hair and exploitation in the beauty economy
- Biohackers, body modification, and the quest for immortality
The Biohacking & Immortality Chapter (28:21–34:52)
- Explores the “Near Death is the Father of Beauty” chapter, which documents encounters with longevity enthusiasts and transhumanist biohackers pre-mainstream.
- Contrasts privilege-driven interests in longevity with the lack of societal investment in true disability justice and accessibility.
- Quote:
“If we were able to dedicate as much passion, drive, curiosity, and solution-making to everyday access issues for disabled people and chronically ill people, this country would be a lot better off. But we still have wheelchairs being broken in airports by the dozens every single day.” — Arabelle (34:15)
Cosmetology School & Direct Experience (36:20–39:27)
- Arabelle is pursuing cosmetology at Santa Monica College for research, not professional practice, to understand access, education, and the lived experience of beauty workers.
- Learns directly from instructors about the industry’s long-term health impacts, sacrifices made by service providers, and the variety of students’ backgrounds (working moms, career changers, etc.).
Vision for a Better Beauty Industry (39:27–42:31)
- Discusses maintaining hope and a communal vision for change, despite being steeped in industry horrors.
- Cites Mariame Kaba:
“Hope is a discipline” — Arabelle’s guiding mantra during writing
- Imagines a future where the beauty industry centers true care, labor rights, sustainability, and solidarity.
- Quote:
“If we were to say it doesn’t matter because the world is collapsing and we just leave it at that, we would be doing the job of those who oppress us. It’s our job to do the work and hope that it works out... Another world is possible, not guaranteed.” — Arabelle (42:00)
Rapid-Fire Beauty Faves & Indulgences (43:39–45:10)
- Arabelle’s current indulgence: weekly blowouts (even if it means cutting back on therapy).
- Revels in wandering NYC and sampling affordable services like two-hour Chinatown massages.
- Quote:
“My deepest indulgence is, I don’t wash my own hair. I am getting a weekly blowout... This still counts as mental health, but it is therapeutic.” — Arabelle (43:54)
Connection, Follow-up, and Book Tour Info (45:15–46:09)
- Find Arabelle at arabellsicardi.substack.com
- Upcoming book events at Books Are Magic (NYC), Skylight Books (LA); scented bookmarks available with indie pre-orders.
- Active on all major social platforms.
Notable Quotes & Moments (with Timestamps)
- “I can love something that I hate and hate something that I love. Both are true emotions and both are fair to have... It’s like shadow work.” — Arabelle (22:19)
- “Wedding planning is a heterocentric nightmare.” — Arabelle (14:44)
- “Hope is a discipline.” — (quoted from Mariame Kaba, 40:05)
- “If we were able to dedicate as much passion, drive, curiosity, and solution-making to everyday access issues for disabled people and chronically ill people, this country would be a lot better off.” — Arabelle (34:15)
Timestamps for Key Segments
| Timestamp | Segment | |-----------|---------------------------------------| | 02:01 | Opening catch-up, life/parenting talk | | 10:05 | Introduction of Arabelle Sicardi | | 12:28 | Self care practices | | 14:40 | Marriage, wedding stories | | 17:15 | Nails and community | | 20:32 | House of Beauty: what’s it about? | | 25:15 | Book structure & chapter themes | | 28:21 | Biohacking, body modification | | 36:20 | Cosmetology school insights | | 39:27 | Vision for a better industry | | 43:39 | Beauty routines Arabelle enjoys | | 45:15 | Where to find Arabelle |
Closing Reflections
- The episode skillfully balances humor and honesty as it explores the contradictions of craving beauty in a culture and industry rife with exploitation, inequality, and climate peril.
- Arabelle Sicardi challenges listeners to confront beauty’s dark side without surrendering hope or their own enjoyment of self care.
- The call is for a new, community-based approach to beauty—one that's as much about collective well-being and justice as it is about products and glam.
Useful for anyone who hasn’t listened, this summary spotlights the episode’s major themes and arguments, notable anecdotes and insights, and the spirit of hope and self-examination at its core.