Forever35 — Mini-Ep 476: From Butt-ne to Back-ne

Hosts: Doree Shafrir & Elise Hu
Date: January 21, 2026

Episode Overview

In this lively mini-episode, Doree and Elise field listener questions and tackle real-life skincare woes like back acne (aka "back-ne") and keratosis pilaris, discuss the tricky process of ending therapy relationships, debate the realities of Gen Z and career aspirations, and share listener-favorite travel pants. The hosts maintain their signature balance of humor, self-awareness, and generous, practical advice, emphasizing community expertise and the importance of prioritizing one’s personal well-being.

Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Breaking Up with Your Therapist (02:32 – 07:19)

• The episode opens with a call-back to ongoing conversations about how to end relationships with therapists, sparked by listener questions. Elise recounts her own journey from traditional CBT therapy ("Bobbi with an ie") to working with a Jungian analyst ("Jonathan"), which she found transformative for her midlife period.
  • Notable quote:
    _"She felt like such a friend. And we had such like a tender relationship with one another that three years later... she showed up in Pasadena for my book launch... But it is. It's complicated. Right. Because she's not really a friend. ... She only knows a lot about mine."
    — Elise (04:50)
• Doree shares an email from a psychologist listener explaining the clinical, ethical, and legal importance of how and why therapy ends, especially with trainee therapists.
  • Notable quote:
    "It's actually very important to understand why, when, and how therapy ends, because all of these things have meaning in the context of your overall therapeutic intervention. ... It's not just about the client. It's about our professional, legal and ethical obligations in practice." (06:00)
  • The psychologist also recommends that issues with a trainee therapist be reported to their supervisor, as "this is egregious enough that it would warrant a fail if they didn't correct it" (06:56).
  • Lightheartedly adds: "The therapists in your life are not okay, I can tell you that much." (07:11)

2. Butt-ne to Back-ne: Body Acne & Exfoliation Tips (07:38 – 10:41)

• Producer Sammy Junio calls in asking for advice about exfoliating "back stuff," revealing a common, practical skincare struggle.
• Doree and Elise reference previous deep dives into "butt-ne" (butt acne) and extend those recommendations to back acne:
  • Salicylic acid body washes or cleansers.
  • Benzoyl peroxide as an alternative, depending on personal skin tolerance.
• Elise brings up keratosis pilaris (KP) — genetic "bumps" commonly on arms — and recommends:
  • AmLactin: a lactic acid lotion effective for KP. Elise notes her early access due to her pharmacist dad. (09:34)
  • Italy towels: Rough-textured mitts from Korean spas, great for exfoliation (but not popular with her daughters due to their appearance!).
  • Notable quote:
    "So from butt-ne to back-ne. ... It sounds like the butt-ne solutions would apply." — Elise (10:41)

3. Listener Letters: Siblings, Snoring, and Gen Z Work (13:36 – 20:52)

Sibling Dynamics & Caretaking (13:36 – 15:59)

• Listener writes in about fears and rewards of having multiple children, especially when one child has disabilities and future caregiving responsibilities are involved.
• Elise connects to their earlier episode with Vanessa Grigoriadis about being an only child dealing with aging parents, and shares that having a sibling has been fortifying as her own father shows signs of dementia.

Snoring Advice Without Sleep Apnea (16:38 – 17:35)

• A listener's snoring persists despite negative sleep apnea tests and various interventions.
• Hosts cite data: 25-50% of adults snore regularly; about half of loud snorers have obstructive sleep apnea.
• Doree shares that the American Medical Association recommends:
  • Mouth taping to keep the mouth closed.
  • Oral appliances (see a dentist).
  • Snoring strips.
  • Limiting alcohol.
  • Consulting an ENT.
• They invite further medical advice from listeners.

Is Content Creation Gen Z’s Only Job? (18:13 – 20:52)

• A listener pushes back on Elise’s previous remark that content creation is the only Gen Z career, highlighting labor shortages in trades like nursing, dental hygiene, mechanics, plumbing, and more.
  • Points out trade school paths provide stable, valued work — a compelling option amid AI’s delayed impact on manual trades.
  • Notable quote:
    "Who's going to rebuild it again? Content creators or people with physical tangible skills?" (19:40)
• Elise agrees the content creator path is difficult and unstable, and reiterates the value of trade careers:
  "It's a treadmill. It's a treadmill." (20:51)

4. Advice Corner: Hair Loss Treatments, In-Flight Pants, and More (22:38 – 29:15)

Spironolactone & Oral Minoxidil for Hair Loss (22:38 – 25:40)

• Listener shares success story with oral minoxidil for hair thinning, in combination with spironolactone.
  • Started on low dose, saw visible new growth after 3-6 months.
  • Spironolactone helps counteract unwanted body/facial hair side effects from minoxidil.
  • Doree confirms she’s seen significant new hair growth on oral minoxidil alone, with few side effects, and that it's affordable with insurance.
  • Notable quote:
    "My hair is so much fuller now. I have chunks of new growth. So if you are thinking about it, you could start on a very low dose and see." — Listener email (23:54)

What Pants to Wear On a Plane? (25:41 – 29:15)

• A listener seeks comfy, breathable, affordable travel pants.
• Elise swears by old Lululemon high-rise joggers: sweat-wicking material, durable, with comfy "scuba" feel.
• Doree prefers Somersault’s cotton joggers ("the softest French Terry jogger," but notes uncertain sizing/availability).
• Other recommendations:
  • Vuori joggers: "Really nice."
  • Varley sweatset joggers: Substantial, high-quality, endorsed by Elise's family.
  • Spanx Air Essentials line: Intriguing, though pricier.
• Both hosts request further listener suggestions for the elusive "perfect travel pants."
  • Notable quote:
    "I feel like this is my, like, perpetual white whale. ... I probably need to, like, replace them. So let us know." — Doree (28:53)

Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• On therapy endings (06:00):
  "It's actually very important to understand why, when, and how therapy ends... It's not just about the client. It's about our professional, legal and ethical obligations in practice."
• On trade work vs. content creation (19:40):
  "Who's going to rebuild it again? Content creators or people with physical tangible skills?"
• On exfoliating tools (09:34):
  "It's called AmLactin... I love it. I think it is very effective. And then the other thing is, I have those Italy towels they use at the Korean spas... and I love them."
• On new hair growth (23:54):
  "My hair is so much fuller now. I have chunks of new growth... start on a very low dose and see."

Important Segment Timestamps

• [02:32] – Breaking up with your therapist: listener & professional feedback
• [07:38] – Exfoliating and treating back acne, "from butt-ne to back-ne"
• [13:36] – Sibling relationships and caring for aging parents
• [16:38] – Non-apnea snoring: listener problem and evidence-based advice
• [18:13] – Gen Z, content creation, and the value of trade careers
• [22:38] – Hair loss: spironolactone, oral minoxidil, and firsthand experiences
• [25:41] – What to wear while flying: jogger recommendations

Tone & Style

The hosts' dynamic remains thoughtful, witty, generously self-disclosing, and grounded in lived experience. They encourage vulnerability, invite expert and listener wisdom, and never miss the chance for a self-aware laugh.

For Further Listening & Engagement

• Reach out at forever35podcastmail.com
• Call/Text: 781-591-0390
• Share your own travel pant favorites or snoring solutions!