Founder’s Story – Episode 290

When the Siren Stops: What Really Happens After the Call Ends (And Why No One Talks About It) with John P. Yirku
Date: December 11, 2025
Host: IBH Media Podcast Host
Guest: John P. Yirku, First Responder, Author

Episode Overview

This episode dives deep into the emotional and psychological world of first responders through the lived experience of John P. Yirku, a career police officer, firefighter, EMT, and the author of When the Siren Stops. The conversation addresses the invisible burdens these everyday heroes carry after the emergencies end, focusing on mental health, stigma, and the importance of communication and support systems—both for responders and for the people who love them.

Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. What the Public Sees vs. What Really Happens

• First Responder Stereotypes: The public perceives first responders as brave heroes operating in the face of danger, but rarely considers what happens emotionally after the crisis is over.

• The Hidden Trauma: John outlines how the cumulative impact of repeated trauma often goes unseen and unspoken.

  "They see us as going into the fire or helping people in a crisis as a police officer, but they don't see what happens afterwards."
  — John Yerku (03:17)

2. Bottling Up and Stacking the Stress

• Emotional Suppression: First responders often bottle up their emotions, fearing they will burden others.

• Stacking Responses: With each call, stress accumulates, leading to lasting mental health struggles if left unchecked.

  "A lot of the mental health struggles is actually bottling stuff up and stacking and stacking the responses that they see in here, but not releasing it."
  — John Yerku (03:30)

3. Personal Wake-Up Call — Recognizing the Effects on Family

• John’s Turning Point: John recounts a pivotal moment playing with his grandson when a traumatic memory overtook him, making clear the impact these unresolved stresses have—not only on himself but also on his loved ones.

  "All of a sudden, I wasn’t there... I snapped back and my grandson was looking at me like, what’s wrong? That’s when I realized that, hey, it doesn’t only affect us, it affects our families."
  — John Yerku (04:13)

4. How Can First Responders Open Up?

• Family as a Support System: Recognizing that family desires to help, but often lacks the tools or invitations.

• The ‘Code Yellow’: John’s suggestion for a ‘code yellow’—a simple check-in text—lowers the barrier to starting deeper conversations.

  "There's a, what we call as, I call as a code yellow is where you just text somebody and say, hey, I'm not okay, but hey, that's okay. We can connect and we can discuss it."
  — John Yerku (05:10)

5. John’s Four-Pillar System

John shares a framework to help first responders (and anyone struggling with unseen burdens):

• Recognize: Be honest about your own warning signs ("Do I have sleepless nights? Am I irritable?").

• Reach Out: Confide in family, friends, peers, or professionals.

• Communicate: Openly share struggles, break through the stigma.

• Respond: Let people in, build connections, and be present for others.

  "First thing you have to recognize... When you recognize that, then you have to reach out... then you have to respond by letting people in, letting your emotions show you're not alone."
  — John Yerku (06:23)

6. The Power of Presence

• John highlights how sometimes, just being physically present with a struggling colleague can help, even when words fail.

  "He didn't communicate. He didn't say anything. I was just there. Just the presence of me being there just to reach out to know that somebody, you're not alone. That's the main thing."
  — John Yerku (07:16)

7. Partnership and Communication in Marriage

• Dual-Responder Marriage: Both John and his wife are EMTs and firefighters, and their partnership is rooted in open communication and mutual understanding of trauma.

  "She has her views, I have my views. But yet we can talk about that. We can bounce that off of each other... Our love has gone deeper, we understand each other and we can give each other space."
  — John Yerku (08:31, 11:58)

8. Memorable Moments and the Meaning of Legacy

• Saving a Fellow Responder: John recalls saving a coworker’s life and the powerful feeling of gratitude and shared understanding.

  "To have him come back and just say thank you... Not only to help save a co worker, but just to save a life—awesome moment."
  — John Yerku (13:01)

9. Writing the Book: Motivation & Mission

• Breaking the Stigma: Sharing his story in When the Siren Stops was about providing support and guidance, and normalizing the act of seeking help.

  "We need the support and the guidance from others. Family, professionals and a program. Something that tells us we're not alone... We need to get the message out there that, hey, it's okay to say I'm not okay."
  — John Yerku (14:53; 15:36)

10. Resources & How to Connect

• The book When the Siren Stops is available on Amazon, Audible, and John’s website whenthesirenstops.com.

  "It's available on Amazon... I do have an audiobook on Audible... I do have my Website whenthesirenstops.com they can reach me there and look for my book there as well."
  — John Yerku (16:36)

Notable Quotes & Moments with Timestamps

• Mental Stacking:
  "They keep bottling up and they don't want to talk about it. That's one of the main goals in my book, is you have to recognize it and then you need to reach out." — John Yerku (03:30)

• Personal Wake-up Call:
  "That's when I realized that, hey, it doesn't only affect us, it affects our families... everybody needs to reach out and look for that connection." — John Yerku (04:13)

• The 'Code Yellow' Concept:
  "Just text somebody and say, hey, I'm not okay, but hey, that's okay." — John Yerku (05:10)

• On the Four Pillars:
  "Recognize... reach out... respond... You respond by letting people in, letting your emotions show you're not alone." — John Yerku (06:23)

• On Partnership:
  "Our love has gone deeper, we understand each other and we can give each other space." — John Yerku (11:58)

• Breaking the Stigma:
  "No, you're not weak. You're human. And that's what we need, to get that message out there." — John Yerku (15:36)

Important Timestamps

• What it's like to be a first responder: 02:56
• Mental health struggles & bottling up: 03:30
• John’s personal turning point: 04:13
• How to encourage openness: 05:10
• John’s four-pillar system: 06:23
• Presence and supporting colleagues: 07:16
• Marriage, trauma, and healing: 08:31, 11:58
• A life-saving moment and gratitude: 13:01
• Motivation for writing the book: 14:53
• Where to find the book: 16:36

Episode Tone

The tone is empathetic, honest, and hopeful, encouraging openness about mental health struggles while remaining grounded in the realities of first responder life. John’s approach is both practical and heartfelt, focusing on dismantling stigma, fostering real connection, and reminding listeners—whether responders or not—that everyone needs help sometimes.

Conclusion

This Founder’s Story episode with John P. Yirku is a powerful reminder of the silent struggles endured by first responders, and the critical role vulnerability and communication play in healing—not just for individuals, but for families and communities as a whole.
Whether you’re a first responder, part of their support network, or simply seeking inspiration, John’s journey and tools offer valuable lessons for coping, connecting, and overcoming.