13 Things You're Probably Wasting Money on (That No One Talks About)

Summary

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Frugal Friends Podcast

Episode Summary: "13 Things You’re Probably Wasting Money on (That No One Talks About)"

Hosts: Jen Smith & Jill Sirianni
Release Date: May 19, 2026

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Episode Overview

In this insightful and entertaining episode, Jen and Jill dive into 13 often-overlooked ways people waste money—covering not only physical purchases but also mindsets and habits that keep us from reaching our financial goals. The duo keeps it real, sharing their own slip-ups, commiserating with listeners, and offering practical, sometimes tough-love strategies for taking control of your spending. If you feel like your budget leaks money in mysterious ways, this episode will help you identify and address those hidden drains—with a good dose of humor and relatability along the way.

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Backup Versions of Yourself (03:44)

• Premise: Spending money to support a life you don’t actually live (or no longer live) through clothing, gear, or objects.
• Example: “Clothes for a life you don’t live that maybe you wish you did or used to live and you now no longer live that way…” – Jen (03:55)
• Advice: Try the hobby BEFORE you buy all the gear; borrow what you can; resist funding an “aspirational” or “past” self.

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2. Over-Customizing Everything (06:36)

• Premise: The urge to upgrade, personalize, and choose premium options in every purchase.
• Example: Car upgrades and personalization fees; “Nobody wants the base model of a car... Right. Like, I’m not basic, but I’m not luxury. I am premium.” – Jen (07:13)
• Food Example: Extra toppings or customizations, especially at restaurants or coffee shops.
• Insight: “It’s $1,000 either way.” – Jen, on glossing over car upgrades (08:24)
• Advice: Don’t let upgrades nickel-and-dime you, and don’t underestimate what “just one extra” costs.

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3. Convenience Inflation (09:33)

• Premise: Paying ever-increasing amounts for extra convenience—especially with delivery apps, subscriptions, and “one-click” shopping.
• Example: Hidden costs of grocery delivery and Amazon Prime.
• Quote: “By the time it gets to you, you have a $50 burrito bowl.” – Jen (10:56)
• Advice: Be strategic—use convenience intentionally and sparingly (e.g., after a baby, illness); beware of forming expensive habits.

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4. Research Rabbit Holes & Diderot Effect (13:01)

• Premise: Over-researching leads to unnecessarily expensive purchases and more add-ons.
• Example: Start looking for a $20 item, end up convinced you need the $65 “best” version (13:13)
• Diderot Effect: Buying one thing triggers more related purchases.
• Advice: “I am not basic, but my things can be basic.” – Jen (14:37)
  Most people do fine with the “base” option.

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5. Event Creep (16:08)

• Premise: Social media and societal pressure cause you to overspend for holidays, birthdays, and events.
• Example: “It is those final weeks before a birthday party or a holiday or a trip where we lose it.” – Jen (16:53)
• Personal Story: Jill overspending as a maid of honor, justifying “doing the most” (17:17)
• Advice: Be mindful—keep receipts, tags, and be prepared to return excess.

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6. Replacing Instead of Maintaining (19:18)

• Premise: Replacing gadgets, clothes, or furniture at the first inconvenience.
• Quote: “Avoiding small inconveniences. Not everything needs to be perfect. We can live with some janky things in our life.” – Jen (19:33)
• Advice: Learn to repair and maintain; “live with your small inconveniences.”

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7. Digital Clutter & Subscriptions (22:17)

• Premise: Forgotten subscriptions, free trials, niche apps—silent budget killers.
• Example: “You forgot to cancel, you paid for it and now it’s just going and then you forget again and you get charged for another year. Oh, cancel it today.” – Jen (22:59)
• Advice: Regularly review and cancel unused subscriptions; declutter digital as well as physical.

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8. Buying Time You Don’t Use Well (25:00)

• Premise: Paying for speed or convenience (cleaners, faster shipping, daycare, etc.) but squandering the saved time.
• Quote: “Are you truly resting or are you doing something that’s a poor substitute for rest?” – Jen (26:08)
• Advice: Be purposeful with the time you “buy back.” If you’re not using it wisely, reconsider the expense.

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9. Aesthetic Food Spending (27:04)

• Premise: Overspending on trendy, Instagrammable coffee shops, desserts, and home-cooked meals with specialty ingredients.
• Personal Confession: Jen’s streak of weekly $20+ coffee runs (29:16)
• Advice: Limit trips; unfollow social accounts that feed temptation; create the “aesthetic” at home when possible.

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10. The “Might As Well” Tax (30:17)

• Premise: Small add-ons or going over budget “because you’re already there.”
• Personal Story: Jen’s $75 dinner after intending to buy only a side salad (31:40)
• Quote: “You can’t have side salad energy when you are a two-time espresso martini girly.” – Jill (32:46)
• Advice: Recognize the triggers; pre-plan; avoid environments where self-control breaks down.

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11. Under-Using What You’ve Paid For (34:26)

• Premise: Paying for unlimited memberships, data plans, or big purchases (like ATVs) but not getting the value.
• Example: Family making payments on a $10k ATV but not using it, still spending on other entertainment (35:56)
• Advice: Audit usage; downgrade if possible; prioritize and get full value or cut the expense.

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12. Emotional Reset Purchases (36:36)

• Premise: Retail therapy to cope with bad (or celebrate good) days—small hits of “cheap dopamine.”
• Quote: “We cannot use shopping as the cheap dopamine hit…Let’s choose real good dopamine hits, like the ones you can find on the hierarchy of needs.” – Jen (37:09)
• Advice: Find healthier, more fulfilling self-care or rewards.

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13. Upgrading Before Necessary (39:05)

• Premise: Replacing cars, clothes, appliances, etc., because of minor issues or boredom, not breakdown.
• Personal Anecdote: Jill wanting a new air fryer just because cleaning is annoying (39:37)
• Advice: Only upgrade when truly needed; be mindful of disposal—thrift store donations are often just landfill detours.

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Memorable Quotes & Moments

• On Convenience: “By the time it gets to you, you have a $50 burrito bowl.” – Jen (10:56)
• On Upgrades: “I am not basic, but my things can be basic.” – Jen (14:37)
• On Emotional Spending: “Scrolling too much, overconsumption, are fake, cheap dopamine substitutes.” – Jill (38:36)
• On Justification: “You can’t have side salad energy when you are a two-time espresso martini girly.” – Jill (32:46)
• On Clothes Donations: “Most of the stuff that goes into the thrift store ends up in the landfill…Everything you buy will end up in the trash.” – Jen (41:00)

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Noteworthy Listener Submission

Bill of the Week—Listener Lisa from Ontario, Canada (43:02)

• Lisa used gift cards and loyalty points to get $40 in groceries and $50 in drinks for just $2.50, exemplifying savvy spending and gratitude for the podcast's advice.

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Lightning Round: Personal Admissions (47:43)

• Jill’s Wasted Money: Dining out, sometimes justified but often slipping into convenience or unnecessary luxury.
• Jen’s Wasted Money: Overpaying for a premium phone plan, planning to switch to Mint Mobile.

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Key Takeaways & Strategies

• Analyze your purchases: Are you buying for your current self, or who you wish (or used) to be?
• Resist unnecessary upgrades and personalization.
• Pay for convenience intentionally, not by default.
• Don’t trade one impulsive habit (buying) for another (convenience fees).
• Audit your digital subscriptions as you would your closet or pantry.
• Find healthier ways to cope with stress or reward yourself—shop less, live more.

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Listener Action Steps

1. Identify Your “Leaky Bucket”: Which of the 13 applies to you?
2. Audit Subscriptions & Usage: Cancel what you don’t use.
3. Pause Before Upgrading: Evaluate if repair or simple maintenance will suffice.
4. Reflect on Event & Aesthetic Triggers: Limit exposure to FOMO-inducing social media.
5. Be Honest About Emotional Spending: Swap short-term fixes for deeper fulfillment.

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Final Thoughts

Jen and Jill wrap up with real talk about their own financial slip-ups, encouraging listeners that it’s never too late to “course correct”—and that frugality is about intention, not deprivation. There’s room for fun and premium choices, but most of the time, “your things can be basic.” The episode is packed with solidarity, practical hacks, and some seriously memorable one-liners.

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For full conversation on controlling your spending and embracing frugality—catch the full episode, and don’t forget to subscribe for more laughs and money wisdom from the Frugal Friends.

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Transcript

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[Jen]

13 things you're probably wasting money on that no one talks about.

[Jill]

Welcome to the Frugal Friends podcast where

[Jen]

you'll learn to save money, embrace simplicity, and live a richer life.

[Jill]

Here are your hosts, Jen and Jill.

[Jen]

Welcome Frugal Friends. I'm Jen.

[Jill]

I'm Jill.

[Jen]

And there are probably a lot of things you think you're wasting money on. We've done plenty of episodes on things people waste money on, things we may waste money on. But we identified a couple that nobody else is talking about. It's a little abstract, but stick with us because I think you're going to identify with at least one.

[Jill]

At least. least. Yeah, we're going to go through 13. So that's the challenge. Which one are you? Let us know in the comments or multiple because you wouldn't be alone. But first, we are still doing our mug giveaway. Remember our super cool Frugal AF mug that we have too many of and we want to give them away because we don't sell them. We don't sell merch.

[Jen]

Yeah, so sorry. Not sorry. We've never sold more. Merch have always been for giveaways and we just seem to be bad at promoting them.

[Jill]

So if you want to get a free mug for yourself, all you've got to do is subscribe to the YouTube channel and then let us know that you did that@frugalfriends podcast.com mug and you'll be in the drawing. We've been giving away what, five a month?

[Jen]

This is the final month, May 22nd. Last drawing that's it.

[Jill]

If you've registered already, you're in the running for all of the three months. But if you haven't registered yet, there's still time. Let's do this thing. Subscribe to the channel. If you're not sure what your YouTube username is, leave a comment on this video, on any video, on all the videos. Thank you. And that'll show you what your username is so we can confirm that you

[Jen]

fun little hack for you. Definitely not beneficial for us in any way.

[Jill]

No.

[Jen]

Okay. All right, so let's get into this list. It is a little piercing internally. They are things that I have noticed in other people and myself and so I'm really super interested if you've noticed any of them in yourself. So please let us know in the comments if you have the first one that you're probably wasting money on that

[Jill]

just kicking you right in the gut

[Jen]

off the bat with number one backup versions of yourself. And so what I mean by that is clothes for a life. You don't live that maybe you wish

[Jill]

you did or used to live and you now no longer live that way

[Jen]

and are probably not going to live that way again. Hobby gear for your aspirational self. Maybe you wanted to be the person that hikes, you wanted to be the person that camps and so you bought the stuff and you wanted just sits

[Jill]

in the garage and it might be

[Jen]

dry rotted or this I think will get most people hoarding things from a past life just in case you become that person again. So you've got the aspirational life that we buy things for and then the past life that we long for. And you are truly funding an identity that is not reality, unfortunately. And we've all done it. And here's the thing, this is not something you get over. It's something that you're going to deal with the rest of your life. This right here because it's sometimes things I still spend on.

[Jill]

Yeah it's like, oh well I'm not going to camp anymore but now I'm going to be a baker. Now I'm going to be a cake decorator. Now I'm going to whatever the thing is. If we find ourselves more so buying the stuff versus actually doing the thing, this might be us simple hack on this one is to start doing it now with what you already have. And if that's not possible, if you're like I want to start camping now and I have nothing. Borrow it. Borrow. Surely you have a friend that you can borrow from. Yeah, surely you can Go on to a buy nothing group.

[Jen]

Yeah. I don't think it's wrong to have aspirations to be better, to do better, to be more well rounded. That's not the issue. The issue is the procrastina spending where we're spending all this money on the person we want to be or the person we used to be that we want to be again and not actually becoming that person first or taking any steps to become that person. And so I think the borrowing is a big thing because that's uncomfortable. It's uncomfortable to ask somebody to borrow something. Right. And so there is these barriers. It's just much easier to spend the money and buy it yourself.

[Jill]

You know what people love most? People really do love to lend things. When someone asks me to borrow something, I feel so honored. Like you think that I have something worthwhile that you also would like to use. Not to mention it gives you an opportunity to maybe learn more about that thing that than if you had just bought it yourself. You get to learn how does it work? What are other tips I need to be aware of? It starts to build a connection too. That wouldn't happen if we just one click. Bought on Amazon.

[Jen]

Yeah.

[Jill]

Okay. Number two is over customizing everything. So thinking every single thing that we buy needs to be tailored to us individually. This can include adding all of the add ons, the upgrade grades, the personalization fees, the, the make it premium. I want the unlimited edition. I want the. If there's a top tier, give it to me because I'm special and you are special. But you don't need to spend on your special self with every single upgrade and add on.

[Jen]

Yeah. You know where I see this most cars, nobody wants the base model of car. We all want like the middle version. Right. Like I'm not basic, but I'm not luxury. I am premium. And girl, yes, you are premium. I agree with you. You are premium and you deserve it. But does your income and do your financial goals support that type of premium? Right. Like you are premium. But these car upgrades specifically, great example. Just add hundreds of like hundreds and thousands of dollars.

[Jill]

Yeah.

[Jen]

Every single year. Because we're not just looking at the, at the base cost. It's so easy to spend an extra thousand dollars on a car and not notice it because we're using that anchoring bias. Right. Like all cars are 25 grand or more. So what's another thousand versus if it was an extra thousand doll at the coffee shop, you would be like this is insane.

[Jill]

Yeah. No, I'm not going to spend an extra thousand dollars.

[Jen]

It's $1,000 either way.

[Jill]

But also the three to five.

[Jen]

She's getting it done.

[Jill]

Sorry guys. I'm so popular. But also. Yeah, because we're not going to edit that out. Why would we? The three to $5amounts in every other part of life too. Like I'm thinking primarily food is where I see it. So often you want to add extra meat, extra veg, additional sauce, a floater, an extra alcoholic floater. Right. Everywhere there's an opportunity. An extra pump of syrup, an extra topping of whipped cream. And sometimes you're just like, yeah, throw that on there. Heck yeah, I want more meat. Heck yeah. I want, I want extra french fries.

[Jen]

That's not my personal struggle.

[Jill]

I mean, I'm not doing it that

[Jen]

certain they are out there.

[Jill]

I'm seeing the, it's the upsell. Every and every business is like classic. This is business 101. Give them the upsell. And sometimes they're very good at convincing us to do the upsell. And sometimes it's just because our, our fingers are just like, I don't know, I didn't even mean to do that. It's just like the board.

[Jen]

Oh, you have decision fatigue. And then you just, you were like, okay, okay, yeah, fine. Okay, fine. Yes. All right, Number three is convenience inflation. So we've got yes, grocery and takeout delivery. But we don't talk as much about the tips on top of it. We talk about the fees. Right. So they're up charging you even to buy it on doordash. And then there's the delivery fees. And then you do have to tip. That is a thing you have have to do. So you're increasing at a certain percentage by the time, by the time it gets to, you have a $50 burrito bowl. Right. And so we' talking about grocery Delivery. I paid $50 for Walmart plus for a year because I wanted to try it out also in a very busy like season of my life. It was worth it to me. So I paid $50 for that unlimited, you know, like grocery delivery, the two day shipping, all of that stuff. And then every time I also paid a tip to my driver for delivering my stuff. You know, so it wasn't just the initial 50. It was everything on top of that where I could have saved all that money by just picking up my groceries and not to mention by shopping through an app. You're also teaching that app what you will and will not pay for things. So Walmart has more data on you to raise prices and we'll talk about that in an upcoming episode. It's something that's fresh on my mind that I am just like, I hate it here. So you've got that. But, yeah, so, like, you've got some of this convenience stuff is fantastic. Like, I was able to get groceries delivered to my hotel when I was on vacation. Didn't have to pay a fee for that and tip. Great. Awesome. But also some of it makes it easier for us to impulse spend just how I like. And another convenience fee is Amazon prime, like, literally paying Jeff Bezos $140 a year to make it easier for you to impulse spend.

[Jill]

Yeah.

[Jen]

So you've just got this, like, balance between I love the convenience that is available to us, but what is enough and what minor inconveniences can I deal with to be able to fund my other financial goals fully?

[Jill]

Yeah. Being really mindful about when we pay for convenience. What's our rule? Uh, you can get groceries delivered after you've had a baby. After you've had, like, medical, like, takeout delivered.

[Jen]

I think you can get groceries delivered more regularly. Okay, I'm gonna. Okay, I'm gonna ease up on that one. You want to do.

[Jill]

Something has happened.

[Jen]

I feel something has happened to me, and it's called children. I will still, still die on the hill. Like door dash stuff. Okay. Takeout.

[Jill]

Okay. Okay. Yeah, I could see that after you've

[Jen]

had a baby, if you're deathly ill or if you're in a hotel with children and no car.

[Jill]

Yep.

[Jen]

Yep.

[Jill]

Those are the three reasons. Give us a fourth and fifth if you think they exist, but I'm not sure they do.

[Jen]

Fight you on it in the comments.

[Jill]

Okay. Number four area where we can be spending where we just don't need to is our research rabbit Hol. That can lead to unnecessary upgrades.

[Jen]

Guilty of this, huh?

[Jill]

So you're starting to look for a $20 item that seems reasonable. As you start to understand more and more about that, you're reading Reddit threads, you're watching Instagram reels about it. You end up buying the $65 best option because it's better. It sounds like it's going to be better. So you've spent nearly over triple the amount of money that you were originally going to be spending. And also this one pairs with the Diderot effect, which is buying additional things because you bought one thing. A simple example of that is you get a new phone. Then you think, let me get a new phone case, and all of the different gadgets that go along with it. So it wasn't just the phone case purchase. It was all of the other things that have to go along with it. But we didn't totally factor that. So similar concept here where as we spend far too much time and there's such a push pull with this because we want to make good, wise decisions, we want to research, we want to be patient with our buying decisions. But sometimes we can wait so so long or learn way too much about the product that we think. I'll never be happy with the less expensive one I've got to get. Whatever it is is the best option or at least the premium option.

[Jen]

This feels so real because it's like the. So just like Starbucks with their cups, small, medium and large, and I will refer to them as small, medium and large come at me. They base all of their, like, earnings and spending and stuff, unlike purchases of mediums. Because it's like most people buy the medium, most people buy the middle package, right? And so like, I would love for you to internalize this new phrase that I just came up with. I am not basic, but my things can be basic. And so do I need the medium? Do I need the mid tier? Or is the basic truly enough for me? I just learned this at the gym. I don't need the premium or the mid tier. All I need is the basic tier. And I am fine. And I'm fine with. And I go to the gym three times a week. Like, that's all I need. So I am not basic, but my things can be basic.

[Jill]

Buy what you're going to use. Not everything. Single thing needs to be the best

[Jen]

option and not everything be basic. Sometimes it can be higher tier. But I would say across the board, most of her things can be basic. I think the premium can be like, special.

[Jill]

My blender is not basic. My blender is top tier. And I love that. I've been using it every single day for five, five years.

[Jen]

If you have not heard her talk about her Vitamix, where have you been? Listening.

[Jill]

Yeah, but other things, who cares? Who even cares?

[Jen]

All right, number five is event creep. Oh, okay. Think of the holidays, right? Like November. We're like, this is overkill. These people on social media are crazy. You watched our episode like you're with us. But by the time December rolls around and we have been inundated with that content since October, then we're like, maybe I should. Maybe it's not bad to like add a little bit, like to add a little more to the party, to add a little more under the tree. It is those final weeks before a birthday party or a holiday or a trip where we lose it.

[Jill]

We lose it.

[Jen]

We lose all of the strength we have built to budget.

[Jill]

Mm.

[Jen]

And we go off the rails.

[Jill]

This. This is me. I am pretty. I'm pretty good at not spending, but when it comes to birthdays, holidays, trips, and I'm good. I'm good. Until about two weeks before you nailed it. I talked about this.

[Jen]

So real.

[Jill]

So real. I talked with about this on an episode, but I know not all of you watch every single episode. That's fine.

[Jen]

Shout out to the real ones who do.

[Jill]

Yeah. So you're gonna recognize this story, but I was in a wedding this past January, and I was the maid of honor, so lots of responsibility, lots of honor. And I, in the final two weeks, spent money. I ended up returning so many things.

[Jen]

You did the most. You were the. You were the best maid of honor I have ever seen anybody's wedding, including mine, because I didn't have a maid of honor. But across the board, top tier, 10 out of 10.

[Jill]

Thank you.

[Jen]

Never. No one's ever done it better.

[Jill]

Oh, my goodness.

[Jen]

But you did spend a lot of money in that last two weeks.

[Jill]

I did. And again, I returned a lot of it. I was smart in that regard. Like, I didn't open all of the things that I had purchased, but I just got nuts. I thought, what if we need this? What if we need that? I don't want to come up lacking, you know, like I want. Because this, Sam, is the most beautiful gem of a human being, and she deserves all of the good things. And I wanted her experience that, and I didn't want anything to rob her of all of that specialness on her special day. And it just caused me to just. Everything I know out the door.

[Jen]

Yeah, because you're doing it for another person, too, who truly deserves it.

[Jill]

Right?

[Jen]

So, yeah, I get it.

[Jill]

I see you.

[Jen]

You got rein it in.

[Jill]

What can I say other than know this about yourself and keep the receipts and leave the price tags on, because after it all happens and you look around, you look under the tree, you look at, you're just like, I didn't need to do all this. There is a moment of this. Can this. Can this. This went too far. And can I reverse it? And if you kept your receipts, you kept tags on stuff. Yeah, you can reverse it. Not saying that's like the best long term plan, but it's the best I have for you today because I see you.

[Jen]

All right, number six is replacing instead of maintaining so not repairing clothes, furniture, tech, buying clothes, furniture and tech that cannot be repaired. And I'll say it again, avoiding small inconveniences. Not everything needs to be perfect. We can live with some janky things in our life. Like it doesn't have to be like when we were kids and you had like actual appliances that just never functioned. I'm thinking our dishwasher specifically just never functioned. Ever. That was not it was a minor inconvenience for me because honestly, my dad was obsessed with doing dishes but after he passed, like that was something that needed to be fixed and just wasn't. And so that's a big one. Know your big inconveniences and live with your small inconveniences. So use YouTube, learn to maintain specifically and repair if possible. And live your life with a focus on those things versus just replacing. It is so easy to replace.

[Jill]

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[Jill]

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[Jen]

you forgot to cancel, you paid for it and now it's just going and then you forget again and you get charged for another year. Oh, cancel it today.

[Jill]

Cancel it.

[Jen]

Yeah. You don't even make calls anymore. Just cancel it today.

[Jill]

Yeah. The niche tools that you use like once a month like the digital tools, you know, the the things that you you thought this is going to be so integral to my side hustle the small business. I have just the type of life that I want to lead. But you're not actually using it constantly paying for all the extra storage. I do pay for some some storage.

[Jen]

So do I. I'll be honest. And, and honestly it's this is one of those the the things planned obsolescence like shrink not shrink skinflation. But external hard drives will only last a max of five years. So you will have to keep buying external hard drives. Otherwise you can use a cloud storage subscription for things and that will continue on. So it's like one of those things where I wish I could buy it once and you know, do that. But this is one of those instances where a subscription is is a better alternative.

[Jill]

But I do think people will spend more than what they need. Yes, they might be paying for all this storage but it's to be able to maintain apps that they're not using or keep duplicate videos and photos. And like there is an we can be Cleaning up too, as we go and not just pay to make our problems go away. Yeah, because it is real clutter. I know it's not. It doesn't feel the same as physical clutter, but digital clutter can still have quite an impact on our psyche, our mental health, when things just feel super chaotic and we don't even know how to find the things on our phone that we're looking for.

[Jen]

Seriously, go into apps and then subscriptions, and all your subscriptions are listed out and just start canceling. Just go. Next is buying time you don't use. Well, I'm sorry if this one is. This one is gonna tickle some toes.

[Jill]

Ooh, that's negative. People might not mind that.

[Jen]

Okay, there's a different. Think of something negative. Okay, so paying for speed or convenience and then using that extra time to scroll social media, getting faster shipping and quicker services just to have more opportunities to impulse spend. So getting the cleaner, the daycare, the Amazon prime is spending for those conveniences that are not necessarily inherently bad. I'll argue about prime, but, you know, to each their own. And then what are you doing with your time with it? You know what, what are you doing? Are you truly. Are you doing it in order to have more rest? Are you truly resting or are you doing something that's a poor substitute for rest? Be very conscious about that. Because if you are not fully doing what you were planning to do because of paying, you know, that you could do for paying for these services, then it's a waste of money. Yeah, the service is a waste of money.

[Jill]

I do love paying for convenience with the recognition that time is money and our time is valuable. So sometimes it is worth paying somebody else to do a basic job if it frees you up to do something that's very valuable or of priority to you. But if that's not what's happening, then we really do need to reevaluate that and shift some things. And maybe we do the basic thing, even though you're a premium woman. Okay, number nine is aesthetic food spending.

[Jen]

Oh, guilty. Done it. Still do it.

[Jill]

All of it.

[Jen]

Not often. Yeah, but I will be tempted.

[Jill]

It gets all of us. And for that reason, we need to talk about it. Okay, we've got 13. So we've got 13 of these friends, and none of them are easy to hear. Okay. We're talking to ourselves as much as we're talking to you. This is the cute coffee shops. We got one near us called Concrete

[Jen]

Coffee Coffee Concrete because it's so edgy. They. They do It Yoda style, right?

[Jill]

Yeah, it's just got some 80s Miami vibes that people are really so aesthetic.

[Jen]

And the coffee is actually very good. And it's, it's probably like $20.

[Jill]

Like it's so expensive.

[Jen]

So expensive.

[Jill]

Trendy desserts, the kind that just look so stinking beautiful. The Instagram meals, this one will definitely get me. I will be inspired to cook something which that's great if, if we can get inspiration from social media to cook more at home. Excellent. But the trap is we are making things with ingredients that we don't keep on hand and we may not use again. And so we're spending more even to eat at home than what we necessarily need to do. All because we're chasing aesthetic. And listen, we don't need to spend on that. We can make things look good, we can have cozy experiences. We don't have to buy something just because it looks good, because it's going to get consumed.

[Jen]

Honestly. Quit following, like get off social media for 30 days and see how much aesthetics, food spending you do. Because I know when I am on, I like, I like to follow local accounts to see what's going on because I don't get out much. And when I see more of that, I want to spend on more of that. And that's not bad. I love supporting a local coffee shop, a local restaurant. I cannot afford to patronize them. Patronize?

[Jill]

Yeah.

[Jen]

Right, yeah, them weekly. I just, I can't, not with the goals and the other expenses that I have prioritized more highly. So getting off of social media has lessened that desire for me to buy these things. So yeah, I, I, I went through a season where I was going to Coffee Concrete like weekly for like five or six weeks. Then I was like, nah, I can't.

[Jill]

Wow, you didn't tell me about that. You didn't tell me about how often you were going you were keeping this a little secret.

[Jen]

I did keep it a secret.

[Jill]

Well, I put it secret in the dark corner.

[Jen]

It was on my personal card.

[Jill]

Uh huh.

[Jen]

Mostly.

[Jill]

Okay. I do love aesthetic things. I'm not gonna lie about it. But I can make that for myself. Many of you know who have listened to this podcast for a while. I like to plate my food every day. Like that's something I can do that doesn't cost me money and makes it look really cool. Like there are things that if you like that, you do it for yourself.

[Jen]

Yeah. And if you don't know how to do that or are not good at it, then just budget for the Aesthetic food in the amount that you can afford it while reaching your other goals and prioritizing your other expenses. Mm. All right. 10 is the might as well tax. Oh. Oh. I have a story.

[Jill]

I learned from stories.

[Jen]

Okay, so it's like I'm already here. Might as well just adding a couple extra items at checkout. It's why we show. We show up at the bar not planning to buy anything because you know you will. And so I went out to dinner with some other moms at this really expensive restaurant. I was like, I actually hate this restaurant. It's so overpriced.

[Jill]

I know the one you're talking about.

[Jen]

It is like, like average quality food for an exorbitant amount. And you know what?

[Jill]

It's aesthetic, though.

[Jen]

The place is aesthetic. The place is gorgeous. And the. The servers wear little aprons like they're back there making the food when they are not. And they serve the checks in, like actual books. It's like that place. And I was like, you know, I'm going to just get a side salad. That's going to be. That's going to be fine for me.

[Jill]

You know me, just a side salad girly.

[Jen]

You know, a side salad girl. You know what happened? I ordered two espresso martinis and a big entree salad and I walked out of there after tip. I think I spent like $75 on myself. And I was like, I hate it here. I hate myself and I hate doing things.

[Jill]

But how were the espresso martinis? You do love them.

[Jen]

Oh, it was great. It was great. Well, that's why I ordered a second.

[Jill]

Might as well. I'm already here.

[Jen]

I've already went over, like, I haven't even ordered the salad yet. And I've already ordered. I've already broken my commitment to myself. Might as well. This is it. And this is where boundaries come into play. Because I know I am not a strong girl, not a strong person. I know when I go out somewhere, I'm going to spend money. And that's why I try not to do it often. I try not to go out often because I got daycare.

[Jill]

You can't afford. You can't have side salad energy when you are a two time espresso martini girly.

[Jen]

You just.

[Jill]

You can't do that.

[Jen]

I am so conflicted. It's also with snacks, like Tangent. Like, if there are snacks, I can't be like, oh, I'm not going to have snacks because I'm going to eat dinner later. No, I eat all the snacks. Yeah. If they're in front of me, I eat all of them. And I have no concern for the amount of snacks other people get if they are also not as passionate about snacks as I am. Yeah.

[Jill]

Just be aware if you've got the might as well phrase in your lexicon because. Yeah, it's gonna be one of the most expensive phrases that we utilize.

[Jen]

Yeah.

[Jill]

Is the mind as well. This for me is where pre planning my while spending. But I think this happens for me most often at the grocery store. And some of it intersects with like forgetting whether or not I have something or if I need more of something. So having made my list off of what I already have, really does cut out some of that. Oh, wait, should I. Oh, I might as well. Who knows when I'm going to be back again? No, I'm going to be back again next week.

[Jen]

Yeah. And that's why I try to do things with people that are not like at restaurants or bars. So we're going to a free event, they're coming to my house, we're going to their house. Like things that I can engage with people, but I do not put myself in that situation to make those decisions.

[Jill]

Frequently, number 11 is under using what you've already paid for. So this is things like the gym, Any courses that you might have bought. Annual passes, unlimited, Literally anything unlimited, but particularly data on cell phones. I think a lot of have been trained in the way of thinking we need unlimited usage. Check your usage though, because you might not actually be using anywhere near what unlimited means. And it could actually be less expensive for you to buy just a little bit more than what you typically use month to month. So there's areas where we could just be saving. But that's the thing, is it's not about the purchase itself itself. It's about us not using the thing or not using it to its fullest potential. So I think this is where we can do a bit of an audit on are we using this to its full potential? Awesome. We don't even need to question it then. Are we not. Are we using it minimally though? Is there a way that we could get a discount then? Could we go to the gym? Could we go to our carrier and say, you know what, I actually only want to pay for premium. I don't need the luxury anymore. Or basic is fine for me and reduce those costs. And if you're just not using it at all, cancel it, Stop it, Don't do it.

[Jen]

Yeah. This isn't just subscriptions. If you watched our budget makeover episode the family spent $10,000 on an ATV, which is like a four wheeler all terrain vehicle. And they were making monthly payments on this $10,000 ATV and they were constantly overspending in entertainment in their budget. And we were point you don't have enough money to pay for this monthly payment, which is like a subscription to this ATV, over $200 a month, and then also be spending over $200 a month on other forms of entertainment. You have around $200 to spend on entertainment and you need to decide whether it's going to be the atv, which is fine. If you ATV a lot and you're using it, you're getting a lot of use out of it, then keep it. But if you want to do other things, then you cannot prioritize both. One has to go. So you have to look at these things like, like boats and golf carts and all these other things you might be making payments on. And if that's something you truly want to keep, then that's your entertainment and you need to be using it every weekend and not spending money on other forms of entertainment if your income cannot support it right now. So true. Yeah. 12 is emotional reset purchases. And, and come on back to me. My maxinistas come to me because this is everything I see on social media having a bad day. End of the week Friday, we're going to TJ Maxx, we're going to Ross, we're going to HomeGoods, we're going to Target, and we're just gonna walk around and like, let the cheap dopamine do what, you know, what it does best and then we spend something, right? Or even a good week. Like I'm having a good week. I'm gonna go celebrate. I'm gonna treat myself to something at TJ Maxx or Target. This isn't it. Like these emotional reset purchases are not it. We need to reward ourselves for good weeks and we need to, you know, treat ourselves when we have bad weeks. But we cannot use shopping as the cheap dopamine hit to do it. Let's choose real good dopamine hits, like the ones you can find on the hierarchy of needs. You know, looking at all of these upper tiers of the hierarchy. Relationships, esteem, self actualization. Let's look there for like really good quality dopamine.

[Jill]

Scrolling too much over consumption are fake, cheap dopamine substitutes. They're not the real thing and they're not going to hit the way that actually identifying our needs and caring for ourselves, our whole personhood, well, is going to do for Us, it's family.

[Jen]

A.

[Jill]

A fake substitute. Let's find the real thing and engage in it. Number 13.

[Jen]

Last one.

[Jill]

Here we go, baby. Upgrading before something is actually bad. Oh, my car needs a repair. Seems like it's going to be a big one. Might as well just buy a new car.

[Jen]

Even if it's a $2,000 repair. We go in and we spend way more than that for a car that is self subpar because they keep making cars worse and worse every year. So you know you're upgrading, but your car is not that much better than the car you're currently driving.

[Jill]

Or. My clothes are still fine. I'm just tired of them. They're too familiar to me. Let's get new ones. We can look in any category of our lives and see that there are times when we would rather just replace the thing even if it's not. We're not even talking about repairing. Right. This is just. I'm tired of it. I am not gonna lie. I have not done this, but I see it in myself. My air fryer. I've got an air fryer that I've had for probably like four years, and I've had to clean it so many times. And cleaning it is so annoying. And I've never gotten it clean. Back to looking like it's new, it just. It just doesn't look that way anymore. And I'm so tired of cleaning it that I have had the thought I could just throw it away and get a new one. So if you've had those. Those intrusive thoughts too, you're not alone. Guess what, though? We're just. We're gonna clean it. That's all we're gonna do. We're gonna not worry about how the. How it's not looking pristine. And I'm with you. I see you. I feel you. But if. If even a small appliance isn't actually broken, unless it's not fixable, we can. We can keep it. Yeah, don't throw it out just because it's going to be inconvenient.

[Jen]

And on the clothes topic, if you would not throw those clothes in the trash, then don't take them to the thrift store. I mean, I. And I. I speak to you because we are only speaking to maybe like 20,000 of you and not like the billion other people that are donating to thrift stores. But if I can save 20,000 people, because most of the stuff that goes into the thrift store ends up in the landfill. So we are not better people for taking Our stuff to a thrift store versus just throwing it away, Honestly, in this day and age, because over consumption is so rampant, that has just changed, right? So imagine I still want you to take it to the thrift store. I don't want you to throw it away. But you have to imagine like, you have to be okay with the fact, like everything I take to the thrift, thrift store could end up in the garbage. Am I okay with that? And I think it'll really make you think twice about consuming because everything you buy will end up in the trash. And is it worth it to me to buy something that my grandkids are going to have to deal with after I'm gone and is going to keep me from the financial goals and the financial commitments that I have made today?

[Jill]

Do you know what's never going to end up in the trash and is something that our grandkids will get to enjoy and their grandchildren and their grandchildren and their grandchildren, they'll all be listening to this because the Bill of the week.

[Jen]

That's right. It's time for the best minute of your entire week. Maybe a baby was born and his name is William. Maybe you paid off your mortgage. Maybe your car died and you're happy to not have to pay that bill anymore.

[Jill]

Duck Bills, Buffalo Bills, Bill Clinton.

[Jen]

This is the Bill of the Week. Hello, ladies. My name is Lisa. I'm calling from Ontario, Canada, or recording, I guess from Ontario, Canada. And I just wanted to pass along how excited I was yesterday over the Christmas break. I had gotten a few gift cards. So one of them is for the lcbo, which is our liquor store here in Ontario. And then another one, I went to pick up a grocery order and it wasn't ready on time, so I had to wait. And they gave me a 25 gift card. Plus I had $10 worth of points to use. So all in all, I bought almost $40 worth of groceries and almost $50 worth of drinks for the winter. Don't get the wrong idea. And it only cost me $2.50, so I was super excited. Thank you so much for all the great content. Keep it coming, Lisa. I imagine our listeners in Ontario literally stocking up on liquor for the winter like hibernating bears. And it makes me so joyful, and it shouldn't, but it does. And so congratulations, Lisa.

[Jill]

Getting snowed in, knowing that you've got some adult bevies stacked in the cupboard. There's nothing better. We support you. Hope you made it through the winter

[Jen]

because you know I support you.

[Jill]

We are just getting caught up now.

[Jen]

I'm going to be toasting an espresso martini in your honor for you, Lisa.

[Jill]

Oh, gift cards can be so great. They're not my preferred gift to give necessarily. I've always kind of thought they're kind of funny just to spend money on one thing, just to give them money.

[Jen]

Okay. For those of us who are gift givers, yeah, they can be a lifeline.

[Jill]

But receiving them can be really great because it's, it's designated money for this thing that you probably will buy. So yeah, I, I love to have them. I'm not gonna lie. It is some, some guilt free spending and it sounds like that's what you experienced here too. You used your gift cards wisely. If anyone listening has a bill that you there if it has to do with preparing for the winter, preparing for the summer using gift cards being Bill from WellFriendsPodcast.com Bill we can't wait to hear it. One way I reduce decision fatigue is by simplifying my getting dressed routine. This means having closet staples with versatility. So my outfits just work for this quint has been my go to. Everything feels effortless but still put together, which is exactly the vibe I want when I'm running errands or recording same.

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[Jill]

I live in their linen pants and dresses. They're lightweight, breathable and actually flattering, which is not always the case with linen. I also grabbed one of their washable silk dresses and had to double check the price because it felt way more expensive than it was. I genuinely wear these pieces on repeat.

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[Jill]

Now available in Canada too.

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That's Q-U-I-N C E.comfrugal for free Shipping and 365 day returns quince.comfrugal does anyone else get the urge to reset everything when the seasons change? Like I start cleaning out closets, reorganizing my space and then I'm like oh my finances could use this same energy.

[Jen]

Energy.

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[Jill]

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[Jill]

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[Jen]

All right. Something you're still wasting money on.

[Jill]

Jill going out to eat. Here's the thing. I've always got a justification.

[Jen]

She does.

[Jill]

But. But if I have a justification, then I guess it's not wasting money. However, when it comes to eating, I do not.

[Jen]

That is not a rule. I do not want you to listen to that. You can't reach humans. Your finger. Don't take that advice. Not frugal friends. Approved. But go on, because.

[Jill]

Well, let me. Let me try and, like, weasel my way out of this. There can be things that most people might scoff at and say, why would you spend so much on that? But if you're trimming in other areas and this is something that you really enjoy, then it's. Then it's fine. And you can afford it. Right? Then it's fine.

[Jen]

Yeah. Then why do you still. Why do you believe you're wasting money on it?

[Jill]

Because I think that there are times that I go overboard. So that's where I think most of. Most of my eating out. I've chosen it. I've budgeted for it. But then sometimes it's.

[Jen]

Since I'm here, I'm already here.

[Jill]

Yeah. I'm a premium girly. Okay.

[Jen]

I'm a premium girl. But my things can be basic.

[Jill]

Yeah. It's out of convenience. Or I choose something that is maybe luxury, and I could have gone premium or I could have gone basic. It's that kind of thing.

[Jen]

Yeah.

[Jill]

How about you?

[Jen]

I would say, Gosh, I. I will go with the answer. With the second answer you put down that you didn't talk about because we have the same phone plan.

[Jill]

Yeah, I know. I just didn't know if I wanted to be so honest that we haven't yet switched to mint.

[Jen]

We have to be transparent. I know of doing it.

[Jill]

I'm mad that it hasn't happened yet.

[Jen]

Right. I'm mad that it hasn't happened yet either. We are waiting out our contract to move to Mint Mobile. Frugalfriendspodcast.com Mint. I don't know if that's the.

[Jill]

I'll check it out. You keep going. Good work.

[Jen]

But yeah, I am done overpaying for premium service. When I am honestly, I am a basic girl. When we want to be, we want to be completely honest. I'm a basic girl and I want a basic service. I want basic, basic services. And one day I want a premium.

[Jill]

It better at least be the basics though. Right? Don't even. Don't skimp out on me on that.

[Jen]

Right.

[Jill]

I at least deserve the basics.

[Jen]

I do deserve the basics. And I want to have those at a lower price. It is. I am willing to endure some minor inconveniences which at this point, I don't even think there are really minor inconveniences with men. Just from everything that we've heard from our listeners over the past eight years. So I know it's embarrassing, but I want you to know that it is never too late to course. Correct.

[Jill]

Yeah.

[Jen]

Never too late.

[Jill]

You know, the thing that truly sold me is looking up how many gigabytes we actually use.

[Jen]

Yeah. You did open our eyes. Yeah.

[Jill]

I think before I was just like, oh, well, you know, the business is paying for it and blah, blah, blah. I mean. Yeah. Again, like you're saying, we are waiting out the contract. It would cost us a lot of

[Jen]

money to get deduction.

[Jill]

Right.

[Jen]

The government pays for it.

[Jill]

But then when I actually dug in, none of us. There are seven people on our plan and none of us use more than 20 gigabytes a month.

[Jen]

Is that including Jared? Who including. He's doing. Jared knows what on his job. We're all data usage here and he's up here. Yeah.

[Jill]

Yeah. Because he doesn't connect to the WI fi at his work. I don't know why.

[Jen]

I don't know why. I don't know why. But that's neither here nor there. Thank you so much for listening to this show and come up with charity.

[Jill]

He's a great guy.

[Jen]

I don't think he's doing bad things like me and blind.

[Jill]

But let's keep going. Let's keep going,

[Jen]

you know, thanks for being here. Thanks for being here. Please subscribe to the channel. It is the best way to help us get this message of things that are things that you're wasting money on and you don't even realize nobody's talking about. To spread this message further and wider, we also talk about the stuff in our book, Buy what yout Love Without Going Broke, available at your nearest library or buywhatyouloovebook.com and there are a lot of kind reviews about the book. If you're on the fence with reading it, take this review from Stacy as validation. I listened to the Frugal Friends podcast pretty religiously, but I was excited for this book to come out. Sometimes I find financial advice to be either super personal or super impersonal, and I love that this book is a perfect balance of both. The advice is applicable and relevant and attainable. Thanks for this book.

[Jill]

Hey, Stacy, I'm so glad you loved it. If you've read the book and you've loved it, please review it. Amazon's a great place place to review it so people go to learn whether or not they want to read the book. And if you are loving us being on YouTube, subscribe. We'd love to.

[Jen]

If you've made it. Have you around, please.

[Jill]

Oh, yeah. You belong here.

[Jen]

Yeah.

[Jill]

You've made it this far.

[Jen]

Yeah. And let Jill know in the comments that her. Her advice for justification. You don't appreciate it. Or maybe you do appreciate it. You know what? Let us see the comments.

[Jill]

I'll take all of. I'll take all of it. Comments are great.

[Jen]

See you next time.

[Jill]

Bye.

[Jen]

Frugal Friends is produced by Eric Sirianni.

[Jill]

No, I think I told you this already, but the person who's texting me was Erin.

[Jen]

Yeah.

[Jill]

In the other room.

[Jen]

And Jared uses. Oh, sorry, we're still recording this. The after show. It's not for bad things.

[Jill]

Yeah, right.

[Jen]

I don't have you figured out why

[Jill]

he doesn't connect to WI Fi?

[Jen]

Well, yeah, because he's in a school and all the sites that he wants to visit are blocked by the school WI fi.

[Jill]

Right. I don't think that that's making the case better.

[Jen]

No. Like, they block everything that's not educational. So unless he wants to learn high school school stuff, gotta use his own data.

[Jill]

Yeah, yeah. And even then with him just not teaching whatsoever and just scrolling on his phone all day, he only uses 20 gigabytes of data.

[Jen]

Google runspotcast.com Mend the man teaches AP classes. Okay.

[Jill]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. He's a great guy.

[Jen]

He's not doing anything.

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