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- [00:00]
Subaru Representative
The holiday season is back, which means it's a time for giving. Subaru and its retailers believe in giving back to those who need it most. For the past 17 years, Subaru has made the act of buying a Subaru during the holiday season an act of love. When you purchase or lease a new Subaru during the Subaru Share the Love event, Subaru and its retailers donate a minimum of $300 to charity. By the end of this year's event, Subaru and its retailers will have donated nearly $320 million to national and hometown charities. To learn more, go to subaru.com share Subaru more than a car company 1.
- [00:38]
Purina Representative
In 3 women and 1 in 4 men experience domestic abuse in their lifetime and nearly half of survivors delay leaving because they can't bring their pets with them. Purina started the Purple Leash Project to help eliminate one of the many barriers domestic abuse survivors face a lack of pet friendly domestic violence shelters. Through the Purple Leash Project, Purina is helping to create more pet friendly domestic violence shelters across the country so so abuse survivors and their pets can escape and heal together. Visit purina.compurple to get involved.
- [01:10]
Radhi Devlukia
This is Radhi Devlukia from a really good Cry when you take a shower, where does your shower take you? If you're like me, your shower is your escape from everything. The Kola Anthem plus Smart Showering system lets you create a personalized refuge by fine tuning water, steam, light and sound all from a single control. You can customize music and lighting, even pre programmed steam therapies. With Anthem plus, you're not just imagining your sanctuary, you are creating it and you can save up to nine of your customized favorites. Personalize your escape with Anthem plus Smart.
- [01:44]
Chase Representative
Showering only from COLA small business owners. This one's for you. Chase for Business and Iheart bring you a podcast series called the Unshakeables. This one of a kind series will shine the spotlight on small business owners like you who faced a do or die moment that ultimately made their business what it is today. Learn more@chase.com business podcast Chase make More of what's Yours Chase Mobile app is available for select mobile devices. Message and data rates may apply. JPMorgan Chase Bank NA Member FDIC Copyright 2024 JP, JP Morgan Chase & Co.
- [02:21]
Field App Representative
The dating app fatigue is real. Mindless swiping, meaningless DMS and an overwhelming amount of likes have made us feel more disconnected than ever. While most dating apps are all about pursuing someone else, there's one that's carved out of space for you to find yourself Download Field F E E L.
- [02:36]
D on Field, an app where curious people come to connect. You have the breathing room to explore your own desires and go on a journey wherein the person you discover is yourself.
- [02:45]
In fact, 62% of field members evolve their sexuality, interests and desires within their first year on the app.
- [02:51]
You have the freedom to explore who you are and what you like in ways you haven't imagined.
- [02:56]
As part of this community, you'll quickly find that people regularly practice honesty and openness. See any Field Bio Download Field F E E L D on the App.
- [03:06]
Store or Google Play PK budget better.
- [03:09]
Jen
Bonus series step 2 make changes now.
- [03:17]
Field App Representative
Welcome to the Frugal Friends Podcast where you'll learn to save money, embrace simplicity.
- [03:24]
Chase Representative
And live a richer life.
- [03:27]
Field App Representative
Here are your hosts, Jen and Jill.
- [03:33]
Jen
Welcome to the Frugal Friends Podcast. My name is Jen.
- [03:35]
Jill
My name is Jill and we are.
- [03:37]
Jen
Back with part two which which is step two of our Budget Better Bonus series. And we are looking at current changes to make once you have looked at your past transactions.
- [03:51]
Jill
So if you tuned in yesterday, if you're following along with us kind of in real time, yesterday we Talked about a 90 day transaction inventory being able to look at the past. Today we're talking about a 30 day no spend challenge. So what things we can do in the present. And tomorrow we're going to talk about making a spending plan. So future, future. So we're doing the whole Ghost of Christmas past, present and future for you in between the holidays, which is fun for us.
- [04:19]
Jen
I wish I had watched the Christmas Story. Yeah, I wish I'd watched to prepare, but I didn't. I'm so sorry.
- [04:26]
Jill
You've never watched any of the. No, I have.
- [04:28]
Jen
Well, the Muppets version is the best, but I'm just like not up on it right now. Okay, so let's talk about changes to make now. The reason we start with the past is that we in our heads might have an idea of what changes we need to make. But more often than not, those ideas are not rooted in reality. They're rooted in fear or misconception or somebody else's ideology. So we look at our past and we look at real numbers. But we also look at emotional weight too. Sometimes numbers may be minimal, but the mental load of that action is really great. So we want to balance by making changes, figuring out what changes we want to make that benefit us most, both financially and mentally. And so the way that we do that in a really efficient way is a 30 day no spend challenge. And the reason we do that is because when you take 30 days, not a year, not two years, we want to learn how to spend, not how not to spend, right? So we do 30 days to take time and pause before we make current spending decisions. And equipped with the knowledge we just got from our transaction inventory, we can better understand our propensity to make some of the decisions we would have made outside of a no spend challenge. But for 30 days, we want to have an automatic no to any discretionary purchase so that we are given time to think about the triggers, think about the root behind it. So whether it's social activity, all those things we talked about yesterday, we have space to think about the root cause and we have space to get creative with how we meet the desire or the need that we're really trying to get at. We say that frugality, it's not about wanting less, training yourself, self disciplining yourself to want less, to desire less, but to just meet your needs differently in a way that doesn't cost you as much money, or maybe it's your other resources, maybe doesn't cause you as much time or mental load or physical space. That's what we wanna do. And we don't do that unless we force ourselves to take space for creativity. And that's what the no spend challenge really allows us to do. It gives us a reprieve from the decision fatigue that comes with making spending decisions and gives space to get creative, innovate, play around, and then go back and learn from those 30 days.
- [07:35]
Jill
This might sound a little bit radical or extreme. And you know us, we don't love extremes, we love the radical middle. But the radical middle is only found by understanding the extremes and picking and choosing from those extremes what is actually beneficial. There's a reason that we're drawn to either end of the spending spectrum. And so to understand, well, what is good about this end of the spectrum and what can I take with me that will lead to some degrees of longevity in spending better? So part of our understanding for this no spend challenge and the benefit of it comes from the research of Dr. Ann Lembke in her book Dopamine Nation, which we do reference in our book Buy what yout Love Without Going Broke. And she does this work with people around addiction, all types of addiction, and has them do essentially a dopamine fast. So like removing themselves from engaging in whatever that activity is, whether it be shopping is, is one example, but kind of all ends of the spectrum with addiction and recognizes that in stopping for 30 days that there's Actually, some really great, even physical neurological benefits where there is rewiring of the neural pathways and a decreasing need for the levels of dopamine that the body and the brain were accustomed to. Now, dopamine's not wrong. There's nothing like, it's a beautiful thing that our body does and releases, and it is good to engage in some of these activities that give us that happy hormone. But sometimes, especially for us, when it comes to money and spending money, we have this release in our brains when we make an impulse purchase, usually just before we make the purchase. And so this is a 30 day no spend challenge as a way to kind of also interrupt not just those habits, but our engagement with the dopamine releases within our bodies and the ways that that's connected with some of our spending decisions and behaviors not to always forever continue to deprive ourselves. Even the research in Dopamine Nation points to reincorporating some of these actions back into place, but in healthier ways with the addition of other coping mechanisms. So we visit this extreme of a no spend challenge to be able to understand ourselves better, reset those dopamine receptors, create new and different neural pathways, and understand what? What else can we be engaging in going forward? What creative ways of solving our problems, meeting our needs, getting at our values can we be doing? And maybe even more accurately to the need? There are times that we might just spend because it's all we know to do. It's what we've been trained and socialized to do. But when we have an opportunity to opt out, like I view a no spend challenge as kind of opting out of consumerism, opting out of consumption, not for forever, but to be able to learn ourselves, learn the world around us, learn what we actually enjoy spending money on. That's what this provides an opportunity to do, an opportunity for learning that then we can more easily find our radical middle from there.
- [11:09]
Purina Representative
Just a few years ago, only 3% of domestic violence shelters accepted pets, meaning many abuse survivors had to choose between staying in a difficult situation for their pet or leaving their pet behind. One in three women and one in four men experience domestic abuse in their lifetime. And nearly half of survivors delay leaving because they can't bring their pets with them. Purina believes in the healing power of pets, particularly for survivors of abuse. They believe pets and people are better together, which is one of the many reasons they started the Purple Leash Project. Through the Purple Leash Project, Purina is helping break down one of the many barriers abuse survivors face. The lack of pet friendly, domestic violence shelters. Purina has helped increase the amount of pet friendly shelters across the country from 3% to nearly 20% through the purple Leash Project. With more pet friendly domestic violence shelters, survivors and their pets can escape and heal together. Visit purina.compurple to get involved.
- [12:12]
Radhi Devlukia
This is Radhi Devlukia from A really good Cry when you take a shower, where does your shower take you? If you're like me, your shower is your escape from pretty much everything. The Kola Anthem plus Smart Showering system lets you make that refuge exactly what you need it to be. It lets you fine tune water, steam, light and sound all from a single control. You can dial in your temperature settings to the degree so it's just how you like it. And you can stream music from your own playlist and program the lighting to create the right mood. And with pre programmed steam therapies with infused aromatherapy oils, it's really getting into spa territory. With Anthem plus, you're not just imagining your sanctuary, you are creating it. And you can save up to nine of your customized favorites. The system even pairs with Cola Connect app so you can start your shower remotely before you're even in the bathroom. Honestly, I'm relaxed just thinking about it. Personalize your escape with Anthem plus Smart Showering only from Cola this episode of.
- [13:11]
Subaru Representative
The Happiness Lab on the Joy of Giving is brought to you by the 2024 Subaru share the Love Event. There are lots of everyday things that bring us happiness, but few compare to enjoying a wholesome meal or seeing a friendly face. Sadly, these are simple pleasures too many of our seniors miss out on.
- [13:28]
Ellie Hollander
Most people don't realize that we have two epidemics going on concurrently in our country senior hunger and social isolation.
- [13:35]
Subaru Representative
This is Ellie Hollander, President and CEO of Meals on Wheels America.
- [13:40]
Ellie Hollander
So we deliver nutrition, but we talk about the power of a knock. There's someone coming in to check on those seniors and they feel safe, more independent, and able to live out their best lives in the comfort of their own homes.
- [13:53]
Subaru Representative
Meals on Wheels calls this nourishment for the body and the soul, and Subaru is a big part of making it all possible. For 17 years, Subaru has made buying a car during the holiday season an act of love with the Subaru Share the Love Event. From now until January 2nd, when you get a new Subaru, Subaru and its retailers will donate a minimum of $300 to charity. This generosity has helped Meals on Wheels make more than 4.6 million deliveries.
- [14:18]
Ellie Hollander
The relationship with Subaru is extraordinary. They're our number one automotive supporter and they care. They always talk about the fact that they are more than just a car company and Meals on Wheels is more than just a meal.
- [14:31]
Subaru Representative
And Subaru's literally been putting the wheels in Meals on wheels by donating 50 delivery cars. But there's still so many more seniors needing help with waiting lists for people who have trouble shopping or cooking for themselves growing.
- [14:43]
Ellie Hollander
And those waiting lists average over 100 days, some as long as two years. So if people can donate, you can help end the wait for seniors who are looking for nourishing meals and friendly visits.
- [14:55]
Subaru Representative
The 2024 Subaru Share the Love event runs through January 2nd. To learn more, go to subaru.com/subaru More.
- [15:03]
Chase Representative
Than a Car Company Small Business Owners this one's for you. Chase for Business and iheart bring you a podcast series called the Unshakables. This one of a kind series will shine the spotlight on small business owners like you who faced a do or die moment that ultimately made their business what it is today. Learn more@chase.com business podcast Chase Make More of what's Yours Chase Mobile app is available for select mobile devices. Message and data rates may apply JPMorgan Chase Bank NA Member FDIC Copyright 2024.
- [15:38]
Jen
JPMorgan Chase & Co. You know when you discover a new binge worthy show or hilarious reel that you have to send to your friends so they can enjoy it with you? That's kind of what it feels like when you discover that Mint Mobile offers Premium Wireless for $15 a month when you pur a three month plan. It's such an awesome deal, there's no way you can keep it to yourself.
- [15:57]
Jill
Friends don't let friends overpay for wireless. So say bye bye to your overpriced wireless plan and switch to Mint Mobile. All plans come with high speed data and unlimited talk and text delivered on the nation's largest 5G network. Plus you can use your own phone and bring your same number over to.
- [16:12]
Jen
Get this new customer offer and your new three month premium wireless plan for just 15 bucks a month. Go to mintmobile.com frugal that's mintmobile.com frugal cut your wireless bill to 15 bucks a month at mintmobile.com $45 upfront payment.
- [16:27]
Jill
Required equivalent to $15 a month new customers on first three month plan only speed slower above 40 gigabytes on unlimited plan. Additional taxes, fees and restrictions apply. See Mint Mobile for details.
- [16:40]
Jen
All right, so let's talk about what to expect on a no spend challenge. I'll say first off when you are going on a path and you decide to change directions, whether you're walking or you're in a car, you will experience friction as you stop and physically change your direction. The further you are changing your direction, the more friction you experience. And that's so that you don't fly off the path. Friction is healthy and friction is what you will be experiencing during a no spend challenge. The entire month is a challenge. That's why we call it a challenge. If it's not challenging for you, you're not learning anything. So mistakes will be made, things will be done out of habit that you didn't want to do. These are not failures. This does not mean you stop and then just try again next month. These are part of the process, part of the challenge, part of the learning. So embrace the friction, lean into it and view it as healthy. View these difficult difficulties as healthy learning experiences. So right off the bat, know that. And in Dr. Lembke's study, she found her patients, the first two weeks of their fasting, they were miserable. The brain's reward pleasure pathways were starting to reprogram, but weren't there yet. So in her patients abstaining specifically from like physical things like cannabis or sugar, their physical withdrawal symptoms peaked in the second week. So you could be experiencing some of that too, if a lot of your overspending is on like food related things. But after four weeks, the pathways she found were almost totally rewired and most patients reported positive experiences. So even during those tough times, know that research shows that good experiences are on the way. Even when we're looking, the brain can do fantastic things in four weeks. Even like the brain's gray matter when it shrinks from alcohol abuse can begin reversing within just two weeks of abstinence. And we say in the book 77% of athletes with mild traumatic brain injuries recover within four weeks. So there is a lot happening in this challenge. So be prepared for, for it to be difficult, but keep going.
- [19:36]
Jill
So in addition to not doing it perfectly and absolutely coming upon barriers, you also can expect that you're going to be able to exercise some of your creativity. So with a no spend challenge, you are deciding what you are and aren't spending on. You've made the list of what we're saying no to. We definitely recommend as many, many discretionary categories as possible. Right. Obviously we're still saying yes to keeping a roof over our heads and being able to buy gas to get to work, but we get to decide all these other categories, whether it's we're not spending on food out. Or we're also pairing it with a pantry challenge and we're only eating the things that we already have in our cupboards and in our freezers. Or we're not spending on activities out. You name it. Or maybe all of it is going to happen for you. If you really want to just like throw it all at the wall and learn about yourself, it will also force you to engage in some unique problem solving and creativity. And we recommend that you don't say no to fun. This is just saying no to a lot of categories of spending for a short period of time. But what we can do is look at where are there free activities happening? In what ways can I be the initiator of some of these fun events? What are the things that I'm finding are really difficult pain points for me? Like I was about to pull out my credit card and I didn't like what I felt. I came across some of that friction. What can I do instead? Because it does need to be replaced with something. This is not just about deprivation. It's about recreating some patterns of behavior, finding alternatives, learning more about what we like, what lights us up. So even in some of the planning process, I would recommend having a list of maybe things you want to try, hobbies you want to re engage in, things that you think you might want to do when you come upon some of this friction and maybe be prepared, Expect to be surprised by yourself that you may find that there are things that are easier in this process than what you thought and possibly parts that are more difficult in areas that you didn't think either way you're going to learn about your so that's a huge expectation that you can have.
- [22:00]
Jen
All right, so how do we prepare for a no spend challenge? There's three steps to a no spend challenge. Preparing, abstaining and learning. So the first is to Prepare and that 90 day transaction inventory is part of that. You set yourself up for failure if you don't know what to expect to be difficult when you start this no spend challenge. But after your 90 day transaction inventory, you have a good idea of what's gonna be difficult in the upcoming and you can prepare for that. So whether that's needing to change a route to where you how you get somewhere to avoid passing a place that you spend at habitually, or it's making your coffee at home before you leave to go somewhere where you're, you know, buying coffee habitually, or you have a habit of doing an activity where you Always end up spending money. Like maybe going to target when it's hot outside. Like figuring out where else I can go that can also get me out of the heat. So this is how we prepare. First we're making that list of the activities and that's one of the resources when you order, when you get buy what you love without going broke. Our resource page also has a list of like 52 activities that you can do instead of spending money to help you with that. But then also there are things obviously that you're going to spend on that you're not. Impulse spending that may, but may lead to impulse spending. Like gas. Nobody's impulse spending on gas. But sometimes being at the gas station leads us to going inside to get something. So can I go to a different gas station or can I just be prepared with that information? Grocery shopping. I always grocery shop on a no spend challenge. Some people don't. But if there are ways that I can stay out of the grocery store, do I just need to check to see if there's anything I need to stock up on before the month starts to make it less likely? I have an unplanned trip to the grocery store.
- [24:02]
Jill
I make so much less impulse food grocery decisions when I order my groceries online. Like you're not, you're not walking the aisle. So that's even a strategy. Even if it's not something you do regularly, it's a strategy you could try during this time.
- [24:18]
Jen
Yeah. Okay. And then next we abstain. So we practice and we are fasting from the dopamine inducing habit, not from dopamine itself. So that's what we're doing when we abstain for one month. And we would recommend also adding in maybe some gratitude journaling or just journaling in general. We don't want you to add more to your plate. We think a subtractive method is most helpful. That's literally what a no spend challenge is. It's a subtractive solution to our problems versus an additive. But gratitude journaling can help with some of this internal motivation to want to keep going when we can sit and be thankful for what's in the present despite not having all the additives that we would have normally. And then last is reflecting or learning. So once we get done with the 30 days, we are then looking back again before we go forward and we are thinking about, okay, what things do I want to take with me from this month and what things do I want to leave behind? And this is where we're going to start making some long term sustainable changes and really finding our radical middle.
- [25:43]
Jill
You know, what is the radical middle for me and I feel like has long term sustainability.
- [25:49]
Jen
The lightning round.
- [25:52]
Jill
I know we're throwing you for a loop here with this one with these little shorter bonus episodes. We don't have a bill of the week, but we do have a lightning round because we can't forget our pew pews. So for today's lightning round, we are asking each other what was the most difficult part of your last no Spend challenge?
- [26:14]
Jen
So for me, I had, I was posting about it last year. I did no Spend January. I posted every day a little tip or a little, you know, whatever I was feeling or learning. And that was for our listeners. Like I, we were all doing it together and I was doing it for them. But I found that people in my life were seeing them and when I wanted to spend money and not tell anyone, they wouldn't let me because they were with me and seeing me with the money and they knew I was on the no Spend challenge. So I would highly recommend talking about it on social media because it's going to help. A lot of our impromptu spending comes from people outside of us. And if they don't know you're doing the no Spend challenge, they don't know to help you. They don't know they can help you or hurt you. And so the most difficult part was not being able to not follow through because I had accountability. So creating accountability on social media is highly valuable.
- [27:29]
Jill
Yeah, for me the most difficult part is when there's invitations to things that are going to cost money. And so yeah, sometimes you can offer an alternative to people like, well, I'm doing this challenge instead of that. Would you want to go to this free event with me? Come over. But sometimes there were just events that they're going to this concert, they just invited me to go with them. And I'm opting out of that just for this very, very short season. But that's one of the more difficult parts of it for me is when there is truly something going on that I could participate in, but I'm choosing not to, kind of for the sake of this other learning that I'm engaging in.
- [28:10]
Jen
We can rationalize that things that come up during the no Spend challenge are, you know, once in a lifetime or never happen, yada yada. And this happens with events and with sales. Like if there's a sale on something, people will want to take advantage of it because they don't know when it'll happen again. And this is another way that the transaction inventory can help you because then you can go back and look, okay, has this person invited me to something that I've spent money on? Yes, several times. So it is totally reasonable for me to ask them to do something that doesn't spend money, it doesn't cost money, or have I done this in the last three months? Yes. Okay, it'll, it will come up again. Maybe it doesn't come up every month, but do I need to do it? Every month is maybe twice a year. Okay. So you can start to ask yourself these questions because you're looking at real data and especially when you're looking back at your shopping and your food purchases and you're like, okay, how many times have I bought something just because it was on sale sale? So yeah, that sale's gonna come up again. It's not a once in a lifetime. You can skip it while you're on the no spend challenge nine times out of 10. But you can also look back and if there truly is something that's once in a lifetime that you've been waiting for or a sale that normally sales can be planned for. So if you know, like, oh, the, the annual sale is coming up this month, but I also want to do a no spend challenge. I'm just going to take this out of it and spend on this this one time because I know I'm planning for this particular sale. But I would say 9.9 times out of 10 that doesn't happen. It's the other way around.
- [29:55]
Jill
Now we know we're giving you a lot of action steps in this budget better bonus series, but don't feel like you have to implement on them all at once. These are episodes that you can come back to to help guide you in this process. Again, the book is a really good for it. The resources page that comes along with the book is a really good guide, but we are still going to recommend that you begin with that 90 day transaction inventory and then plan a point in the future where you're going to do a no spend challenge. We are actually going to be talking about no Spend challenges in the February Friend letter. So that could be a really good time to plan if you're not getting the friend letter already. Frugalfriendspodcast.com Join us in that. We'll be posting more about and kind of walking you through through this no Spend challenge. You can even go back into our Instagram archives a bit to see Jen's journey last year with a no Spend challenge. So you decide when you want to do it, but know that it doesn't have to happen all at once. We're just giving you the tools and resources and we will be back again with our third and final installment of our Budget Better Bonus series, which will be Step three How to Plan for the Future Making a Better Spending Plan. See you then.
- [31:10]
Jen
Frugal Friends is produced by Eric Sirianni.
- [31:24]
Subaru Representative
The holiday season is back, which means it's a time for giving. Subaru and its retailers believe in giving back to those who need it most. For the past 17 years, Subaru has made the act of buying a Subaru during the holiday season an act of love. When you purchase or lease a new Subaru during the Subaru Share the Love event, Subaru and its retailers donate a minimum of $300 to charity. By the end of this year's event, Subaru and its retailers will have donated nearly $320 million to national and hometown charities. To learn more, go to subaru.com share Subaru more than a car company 1.
- [32:02]
Purina Representative
In 3 women and 1 in 4 men experience domestic abuse in their lifetime, and nearly half of survivors delay leaving because they can't bring their pets with them. Purina started the Purple Leash Project to help eliminate one of the many barriers domestic abuse survivors face a lack of pet friendly domestic violence shelters. Through the Purple Leash Project, Purina is helping to create more pet friendly domestic violence shelters across the country so abuse survivors and their pets can escape and heal together. Visit purina.compurple to get involved.
- [32:33]
Radhi Devlukia
This is Radhi Devlukia from a really good Cry when you take a shower, where does your shower take you? If you're like me, your shower is your escape from everything. The Kola Anthem plus Smart Showering system lets you create a personalized refuge by fine tuning water, steam, light and sound all from a single control. You can customize music and lighting, even pre programmed steam therapies. With Anthem, you're not just imagining your sanctuary, you are creating it. And you can save up to nine of your customized favorites. Personalize your escape with Anthem Smart Showering.
- [33:09]
Field App Representative
Only from Cola the dating app fatigue is real, mindless swiping, meaningless DMs and an overwhelming amount of likes have made us feel more disconnected than ever. While most dating apps are all about pursuing someone else, there's one that's carved out of space for you to find yourself. Download Field F E E L D.
- [33:26]
On Field, an app where curious people come to connect. You have the breathing room to explore your own desires and go on a journey wherein the person you discover is yourself.
- [33:35]
In fact, 62% of field members evolve their sexuality, interests, and desires within their first year on the app.
- [33:41]
You have the freedom to explore who you are and what you like in ways you haven't imagined.
- [33:46]
As part of this community, you'll quickly find that people regularly practice honesty and openness. See any Field Bio Download Field F E E L D on the App.
- [33:55]
Store or Google Play pk At Amica.
- [33:59]
Jen
Insurance, we know it's more than just a house.
- [34:03]
Field App Representative
It's your home. The place that's filled with memories. The early days of figuring it out.
- [34:13]
Jen
To the later years of still figuring.
- [34:15]
Chase Representative
It out.
- [34:19]
Jen
For the place you've put down roots.
- [34:21]
Field App Representative
Trust Amica Home Insurance Amica Empathy is our best policy.