Loading summary
Transcript122 lines
- [00:02]
Dr. Laurie Santos
Sometimes life can seem hard and tough to navigate, but what may seem like the smallest tasks, such as getting out of bed or even brushing your teeth, should be celebrated as a win. And State Farm is here to help you celebrate all your wins. The State Farm Personal Price Plan helps you create an affordable price just for you. Talk to a State Farm agent today to learn how you can bundle and save with the Personal price Plan. Like a good neighbor, State Farm is there. Prices are based on rating plans that vary by state. Coverage options are selected by the customer. Availability, amount of discounts and savings and eligibility vary by state. It's better over here. After investing billions to light up our network, T Mobile is America's largest 5G network. Plus right now you can switch keep your phone and we'll pay it off up to $800. See how you can save on every plan versus Verizon and at and t@tmobile.com KeepAndSwitch up to four lines via virtual prepaid card. Allow 15 days qualifying unlocked device cred service ported 90 plus days with device and eligible carrier and timely redemption.
- [01:04]
Jen
Required card has no cash access and.
- [01:05]
Dr. Laurie Santos
Expires in six months.
- [01:07]
Jill
Hi everyone, it's Savannah Guthrie and Hoda Cotton from the Today Show.
- [01:11]
Jen
Nobody does the holidays like today. From festive performances and great gift ideas.
- [01:15]
Jill
To tips for the perfect holiday feast, join us every morning on NBC and make TODAY your home for the holidays.
- [01:22]
Jen
Where'd you get those shoes? Easy. They're from dsw. Because DSW has the exact right shoes for whatever you're into right now. You know, like the sneakers that make office hours feel like happy hour, the boots that turn grocery aisles into runways, and all the styles that show off the many sides of you, from daydreamer to multitasker and everything in between. Because you do it all in really great shoes. Find a shoe for every you at your DSW store or dsw.com this is.
- [01:53]
Dr. Laurie Santos
Dr. Laurie Santos from the Happiness Lab. Many people have questions about how to improve levels of happiness. Living a healthy lifestyle is one sure way of increasing happiness, and a good place to start is with your oral health. Just a few small changes to your oral care routine, such as changing your toothpaste to Colgate Total, can lead to beneficial changes in your oral health. Colgate Total helps stop oral health problems like gingivitis and cavities before they start, because preventing oral health problems is a lot easier than treating them. Be dentist ready and get colgate total@shop.colgate.com.
- [02:25]
Jen
Total Episode 4665 reasons you impulse Shop and How to Resist.
- [02:39]
Dr. Laurie Santos
Welcome to the.
- [02:39]
Jill
Frugal Friends Podcast, where you'll learn to.
- [02:42]
Jen
Save money, embrace simplicity, and live a richer life.
- [02:48]
Jill
Here are your hosts, Jen and Jill.
- [02:55]
Jen
Welcome to the Frugal Friends Podcast. My name is Jen.
- [02:57]
Jill
My name is Jill and today we.
- [02:59]
Jen
Are talking about the root causes of impulse buying, which is very timely for the season that we are in.
- [03:09]
Jill
It's not an exhaustive list, but it is the top five reasons it's the most common of the list. And so we imagine that you'll probably find yourself somewhere within these five, maybe a couple of them. But we've realized that if you can identify what your kind of spending kryptonite is, then you can be better equipped to respond to it and kind of nip it in the bud, so to speak. Not that we will never ever again impulse buy, but if we can understand ourselves better, the way that we tick, the ways in which we impulse shop, then we're not just throwing spaghetti at a wall and seeing what sticks. We can be really pointed with our efforts of finding new patterns and just choosing more beneficial ways with our money.
- [03:57]
Jen
Yeah, and I love that we're doing it right now. This is a great this is the time when every single one of these will be at play and you'll get to learn a lot about yourself in a short period of time. The root causes of why you impulse spend and we hope you'll look at it in a non judgmental light and this episode will just help you learn more about yourself, plan for these things, and do better, you know, in the near future or in January.
- [04:31]
Jill
But first, this episode is brought to you by things you can't resist. You don't want to like hot chocolate on a cold day, the urge to sneeze, the desire to google every medical symptom you ever have, picking up tongs and clicking them together the 2nd through 10th and beyond. Chip There are things in life that are simply irresistible. So you might as well just give in. Kind of like pre ordering our book. Buy what you love without going broke. If you're not going to stifle the sneeze or keep the tong silent, don't even bother waiting on this book either. It's a game changer and it will help you manage money better. Spend better for the rest of your literal life. Buy what you love book.com actually, we also talk about these reasons for impulse spending in the book.
- [05:22]
Jen
This episode is content straight from our book. If you've never listened to the show before, we google topics and Then we'll take results on the first page and we'll go through them and tell you what's fluff, what's playing the algorithm, and what is actually real life. But this particular episode, we are taking what we have learned about impulse spending, what we put in our book, and we're going to give you a primer on it as you await your copy of buy what you love to come in the mail. And if impulse shopping is something that you have found you really need to get a handle on, again, we're not against all impulse shopping. You won't be able to plan every single purchase you make every day. Right. That's what impulse buying is. It's unplanned spending. But if you feel like yours has gotten out of control, then we have a lot of episodes for you to queue up after this one. Like episode 434 ways online stores get you to impulse buy. So we talk about marketing in that 1 and episode 378, Psychological Reasons why We impulse buy. So we go a little bit more deeper into the psychology and kind of brain stuff. If you're like a science geek, I love that one. So let's get into the first reason. And I think this might be my top one. It's why I put it first. Maybe it's not yours, but for me, habit spending. So this is just mindless spending. The spending that maybe at once did have a purpose, but time has gone on to where it's just become habit, and now you're spending unplanned over and over without fulfilling the original reason that that spending may have done it. And the reason I say that specifically is we talk about our friend Paige. You might know her overcoming overspending on TikTok and Instagram. She's a good friend, and we interviewed her for the book. And her story is that she had a job right out of college, and she started buying stuff for her new corporate job. A new wardrobe, shoes, you know, all the things. And she got into the job and realized she didn't love it. And so then she started continuing on with this habit of buying to escape the job. And so she went on this journey to not just get at the root cause, because the root cause was her job, but she couldn't fix that overnight. But there were things that she could do to fix the problem overnight in the meantime. And so we go. We want to talk about root causes, but we also want to talk about in the. In the gap between identifying and actually solving the root cause. There's a lot you can do.
- [08:25]
Jill
So if this one is you, it's important to be able to identify ways to interrupt that habit. We talk about cue, craving, reward. This obviously is not our idea. It is the habit loop. Plenty of books around it, right.
- [08:41]
Jen
Atomic habits, the power of habit. It's all there.
- [08:45]
Jill
Yeah. And so what we ultimately want to identify is what is the cue. Sometimes that can be location related, time of day, certain experiences become the cue, which then incite the craving, which then causes the action and the reward that we get from the thing. And if we can catch habits at the cue and shift whatever that is, find new habits, ways of relating, then we don't find ourselves in the coffee line or making these kind of mindless purchases. So if it is so let's say scrolling on your phone at night and you are one click buying, you're shopping there, then changing up whatever that cue is. So maybe it's shifting just being on your phone at night, or maybe it's changing the immediate apps that you go to on your phone, putting different blockers in place to be able to go play a game instead of scrolling Amazon or even Instagram. If that's the thing that's causing you to want to buy whatever influencers are peddling that evening.
- [09:56]
Jen
Yeah. One of my big things that I talk about in the book is ending up in the Starbucks drive through. For me that's always been a struggle. Like when I was in college and I was heading to like my bartending job that I didn't love, or after I had my babies and I was just trying to get out of the house, I always like revert to ending up in the drive through line of some coffee shop. And at first these were legitimate things. Like a month after I had a baby going, escaping just to get a coffee was a true treat. Privilege, loved it. But as my children grew up, it became less of an escape and more of a habit. So I had to look through my 90 day transaction inventory and identify that that actually had become a habit versus an escape and a and a treat. So what I figured out is that it was, it was a combination of cues, right? So if it was, it could have been like preceding events. So like my husband gets home from work and I'm like out the door. The preceding event of him getting home or time of day, like when I was heading to work in college. So those are the things you kind of have to look for. And the 90 day transaction inventory will really help you kind of pinpoint those cues because you can copy and paste all your transactions into a spreadsheet. You can sort it by day that you made it. So you can see different times, you can sort it by retailer. So if you're seeing like you know, 10 Starbucks transactions in a row, once you've sorted it by retailer, and then you can also maybe see a connection in the time of day that those transactions were made. So it just, it can tell you a lot. So when I figured that out, I was then able to put into place different things to treat myself that didn't cost money. So I invested in, at first I invested in a pour over coffee thing and that just didn't work for me. So it's fine, I can sell it. And then I got my single serve, you know, my ninja coffee bar, that worked better for me and now I get the really nice flavored coffee. So I had to also figure out what worked for me that would incentivize me to choose the low cost option over Starbucks.
- [12:36]
Jill
And helpful caveat here, you did kind of explain it a little bit. But for those of you who the 90 day transaction inventory is a new phrase to you, it is something that we talk about in the book. We actually, as a free resource along with the book, when you purchase it, we do have a 90 day transaction inventory walkthrough. So another reason to preorder that book, buy what you love book. Com. But we talk about compiling all of your purchases over the last 90 days into one spreadsheet. Because 90 days, three months will give you a pretty good sense of what you're spending money on a snapshot. Because month to month things change. But that's a really good clump of time that you can then look at where am I spending money? And it will usually rise to the surface what type of impulse spender you primarily are. So that's a reason to kind of do this ahead of time or to be able to find out even what kind of impulse spender am I. So the second one here that I will point out is stress. Stress can be a big reason that we impulse buy and we will always and forever face stress. This will not go away. So understanding kind of our stress response and whether or not it is linked to buying things that we weren't intending to buy will be really helpful for the rest of our lives. I will also add, well, first of all, there's stress isn't entirely bad either. There's a spectrum of stress. Technically we are stressed when we're excited, levels elevate. But we can also experience all sorts of other emotions that could cause us to impulse by like happiness, celebration or sadness. Exactly. There's a lot of just emotions that could lead us to want to spend.
- [14:40]
Jen
Anticipation, like looking forward to something.
- [14:43]
Jill
Yeah. Oh man. Ahead of a vacation, we spend so many of us spend so much more thinking that we need to buy the things for that trip. So this would just involve looking at, when you're looking at that 90 day transaction inventory, if you can remember and you won't remember for every single line item. But what was the emotions surrounding this? What maybe had happened that day that led to this spending? And you may find a pattern that, yeah, when I have a really rough day at work, I tend to spend more or some really exciting things happened or I was hanging out with my friends a lot and I was having a ton of fun. And so that led to me spending maybe more than I had intended to. And so with any of these, it's not about just cutting it out. Right. If we could just stop, then this podcast episode would have been done before it started, but replacing it, finding alternatives. So one of the things that I love to recommend with this is to create a list of things to do when you're feeling various emotions. Because a lot of times we'll just reach for the closest thing or the thing that worked for us last time. And it might be like fitting a square peg into a round hole where that's not the thing that works for us anymore. Because last time we did that and it did meet a relational need. But this time it's an emotional or a mental need. And so I need something different. So some of this then requires us to even list out mental, physical, emotional, relational. What are some common needs that come up for you or common emotions that you might feel and what might be something that could meet those needs. And this is almost like a dopamine hit list that when we are looking for that thing, because usually that's what it is. When we're feeling various types of emotions, we're looking for that high that even the anticipation of spending can bring to us. And so that's important to recognize. We don't have to avoid dopamine. We can just find other ways to get it in ways that are actually going to meet our needs. So if we are able to identify, you know what, what I'm feeling right now is actually loneliness. So maybe I call up a friend or I write a card to a loved one. I plan an opportunity to get together and do a potluck with people. These could be the actions to go along with a relational need. Maybe I'm feeling really sad, but instead of spending, what else could I do? What kind of lifts my spirits for me? I know that some fun throwback music can really help me when I'm feeling down or trying a new recipe. Cooking something that I enjoy can be an alternative to me and give me some of that dopamine that I might be looking for instead of buying something where inevitably it doesn't actually meet the need.
- [17:50]
Jen
Yeah, I think the biggest thing with stress is that we want to hit the cortisol at the root, right? And so we studied kind of what in the, you know, what actions can we do to really dissipate that cortisol that is heightened by stress. And so the two best things that we found, and this is based on studies that we read, are exercise and meditation. So creating some kind of room for consistent exercise, whatever that looks like for you, and then also consistent meditation. This does not have to be every day. We don't want to add things to your already full list of things to do. Right. We almost want to take a subtractive approach versus an additive. But I think incorporating these two things in whatever way feels right. Like what I said when I, like, was looking for a way to get coffee that was more appealing than Starbucks. I didn't get it right the first time I did all this research, and I was like, this is the way I'm going to go. And it just didn't work for me. But I got it right the second time. So you're going to have to play around with these things. But know that meditation and exercise are effective in solving the cortisol problem that is, you know, leading to stress shopping. And another thing that I got an email from a listener once when we were talking about stress shopping, and I had mentioned, control is a big reason why we stress shop. And she felt so seen by this, and she gave this great example. So a lot of the reasons why we stress shop is because things are happening outside of our control that are stressing us out, right? So we want to hit the cortisol, but we also want to recognize that we can't control that instead of grasping onto something else that we can control, like shopping. And so what she said is when she felt stressed, she just got this thing in her head that, oh, my gosh, winter's three months away, my kids need coats. And she immediately went out and bought coats without consulting sales, without looking secondhand with, without doing all the due diligence just because she was stressed. Things were out of her control, and she latched onto one thing she could have control over, and that's not bad, but we just want to recognize our need for control and choose something that's healthier we can control. Kind of like controlling our exercise and our meditative activities.
- [20:34]
Jill
Monarch is the modern way to manage your money and can be super helpful when trying to stick to a budget. We especially like it for the ways it can help you collaborate and get on the same page with your partner.
- [20:44]
Jen
Monarch is the top rated all in one personal finance app because Monarch helps you make smart money moves. And right now, listeners of this show can get 30% off your first year by going to monarchmoney.com Frugal Monarch is.
- [20:57]
Jill
Easy to use and allows you to see all your finances in minutes and track your spending patterns at a glance. You can also share your account with your partner or even a financial advisor so you can have the clarity and peace of mind your money deserves.
- [21:09]
Jen
After trying out Monarch for myself, I get why it's the top rated personal finance app and right now listeners of this show will get 30% off your first year when you go to monarchmoney.com frugal that's M O N A R C H M o n e y.com froogle to get 30% off your first.
- [21:27]
Dr. Laurie Santos
Year even if you think it's a bit overhyped. AI is suddenly everywhere from self driving cars to molecular medicine to business efficiency. If it's not in your industry yet, it is coming fast. But AI needs a lot of speed and computing power, so how do you compete without costs spiraling out of control? Time to upgrade to the next generation of the cloud Oracle Cloud Infrastructure, or oci. OCI is a blazing, fast and secure platform for your infrastructure, database and application development, plus all your AI and machine learning workloads. OCI costs 50% less for compute and 80% less for networking, so you're saving a pile of money. Thousands of businesses have already upgraded to oci, including MGM Resorts, Specialized Bikes and Fireworks AI. Right now, Oracle is offering to cut your current cloud bill in half if you move to oci for new US customers with minimum financial commitment. Offer ends December 31, 2024. See if your company qualifies for this special offer@oracle.com strategic that's oracle.com strategic Proving Trust is more important than ever, especially when it comes to your security program. Vanta helps centralize program requirements and automate evidence collection for frameworks like SoC2, ISO 27001, HIPAA and more. So you save time and money and build customer trust. And with Vanta, you get continuous visibility into the state of your controls. Join more than 8,000 global companies like Atlassian Flow Health and Quora, who trust Vanta to manage risk and prove security in real time. Now that's a new way to GRC. Get $1,000 off Vanta when you go to vanta.comspecial. that's vanta.comspecial for $1,000 off. Introducing signals, the next generation of platforms for investors designed to elevate your trading strategy by giving access to insights used by Wall street pros to dominate the market. Signals uses its proprietary proprietary data of $70 billion in consumer spend across North America to spot market trends before they make the headlines. We bring you the alternative data that drives decisions at top hedge funds, allowing you to carve your own edge in the stock market. Join the insider circle who are already transforming their investment strategies. Visit joinsignals.com to start your free 14 day trial. No hidden fees, no gimmicks, just pure actionable insights. End your reliance on outdated information with signals. Invest like a pro. Make informed decisions swiftly and stay ahead of the curve. Uncover tomorrow's market moves with today's real time data. Visit jointsignals.com today.
- [24:27]
Jill
Hi everyone. It's Savannah Guthrie and Hoda Kotb from the Today Show. We love this time of year. There's so much to celebrate. That's right, nobody does the holidays quite like today all season long. Join us for special performances with the brightest stars, plus festive recipes to whip up the perfect holiday feast. And great deals on the hottest toys and gifts for everyone on your list. So join us every morning on NBC to make TODAY your home for the holidays.
- [24:57]
Jen
So third is shopping as an activity. And so when Jill was talking about sometimes the root cause of, you know, some of our problems, loneliness. And so how can we meet that? And we sometimes will invite friends to shop with us and this is how we kind of meet that need. But there are all kinds of like shopping as an activity things. I think when I was growing up, we didn't have hobbies or sports really. We had shopping. We went shopping every weekend, whether it was a big box store or an outlet mall or even a farm. So in adulthood that led into like farmers markets and all kinds of things like other things for me. So figuring out what can I do as an activity that does not cause me to spend money and also what am I trying to get really with that shopping as an activity. For Paige, her spending was both habit and activity. And I really think it merged from Necessity merged into activity and then went into habit. So how can we figure that out for Paige? She just replaced the activity she didn't deny herself because she still wanted to escape that job that she didn't like while she was looking for a new job. So instead, she would take her lunch to the park and she would sit under a tree in nice weather and just enjoy the outdoors. And so it was still doing an activity, but just that activity wasn't shopping.
- [26:44]
Jill
Yeah, this is something I talked about in the book as well, that before Eric and I moved into our rv, we were living in very normal sized apartments. And I really loved to go to yard sales and thrift stores. I mean, I still do, but you'll. You'll see why it had to shift in a second. So this was something that we just did on the weekends. We didn't have a ton of money, but we could afford things at yard sales and thrift stores. And so it was something just fun to do. It was what we did on the weekends and collect these things for less than $5. But then when we moved into our RV, I quickly learned that this can't sustain itself. I had to already do a big purge of things to downsize into living in a vehicle. And initially I did still go to the yard sales and the thrift stores, but it didn't feel as fun to me because I couldn't actually bring anything home. And when I did, I'm like, well, where am I going to put this? What am I going to do with this? I don't have this amount of space for things. And so I was forced in many ways to then look for something different. So I did begin it a little bit more begrudgingly, a little less on purpose. But I think it helped me to realize, oh, that wasn't actually really fulfilling me in the ways in which I thought it was. It was fun. I did enjoy it. But when I couldn't actually purchase anything, then I realized that the things I purchased were just junk that I ended up needing to sell or give away. Then what am I left with? And finding alternatives to do on the weekends, which literally did lead us to hosting more. Even though we lived in an rv, it was still very fun to have people over for bonfires or we went on more hikes. We also had a lot less to clean, so it freed up a whole lot more time to connect with people, which is really the main thing that we love doing. And that has stuck now because I was forced into finding alternatives. And I then was able to realize I actually don't love that thing as much as I thought that I did. I do love these other things of hanging out with friends and finding free activities to do together. So I'm grateful for that kind of shove that I got. So maybe not quite as easy to implement this if you're not downsizing to a vehicle, but the encouragement here is that when you do try out different things, you might find something even better. And in that way, it's not deprivation, it's just learning more about yourself and finding new things you love.
- [29:41]
Jen
Yeah. So the solution to this. I really love what Jill was saying. She took her activity and replaced it with a different activity. But not every shopping as an, well, say activity. Okay. Large activity, out of the home activity. Right. Going thrifting and garage sailing. Replaced it with an activity of equal size. Going hiking, bonfire. But not every shopping as an activity is that big. If I'm scrolling Amazon in bed and buying stuff impulsively, getting out and going for a run is not an equal activity to replace with. Right. Even though exercise is good, it's just not the same. So we break down small, medium, and large activities of shopping and corresponding things you could try to replace them with of small, medium, and large size. So we don't have time to go into all of them. But that is a really important distinction that I want to make when solving the shopping as an activity problem.
- [30:48]
Jill
Yeah, yeah, yeah. It has. It has to meet. It has to be congruent. The next thing on here is the thrill of the hunt. And this one is also me. Hi. Hi. I do enjoy shopping as an activity, and boy, do I love the thrill of the hunt. Those red tags, yellow tags, really any color tag, that mean that the price is lower than the original price. I am here for it. And if I had to dig, if I had to elbow my way through mounds of clothing to find the gem, I feel so great. That is a dopamine rush for me. I feel smart. I feel like a huntress. I feel on top of worlds. And boy, do I also love to brag to my friends about the deals that I got. I started to get these reels from people, like on Instagram of the people going through their home and talking about how I got this for free and I got that for $2.99. And like, they're like, this is you, Jill. I'm like, oh, boy, I do have a problem.
- [31:51]
Jen
We were at a speaking event and somebody came up to me and was like, I got the shirt for. For 2 99. And I was like a. Personally, I'm not there. This isn't mine. And I'm like, I don't care.
- [32:05]
Jill
I mean, I'm not here for cheap stuff, and I'm not here to, like, take advantage of labor by any means. But when I get things secondhand and I know what they might have cost, full price, brand new, it's very thrilling. And you know what? I'm just going to say it. I don't think you're ever going to take the thrill of a deal away from me. If I know it's a true deal, I'm loving it. But nothing is a deal if you don't actually need it. And just getting things for lower prices can leave us with a house full of stuff that now we just have to dust. And so one of the things kind of along with my downsizing, because that was part of it for me, it was both shopping as an activity and the thrill of the hunt. Because thrift stores, you gotta dig at, yard sales, you're digging there, too. It's all a hunt. And so I also then had to find other things to replace this. I think that there is something really primal, if I can say it in that way, in a lot of us, it probably is related to being hunters and gatherers, that we want to look for things, we want to find them. We want to pull the gem up out of the soil and claim it as ours and be so proud of ourselves. But that can't be every single time. And it can't be mindlessly when it comes to our money. But we can hunt for other things. There are other ways that we can kind of create this search and challenge for ourselves and a feeling of accomplishment. And that can take on the form of goals, setting new goals for ourselves that we can challenge ourselves with, whether it's setting a new reading goal or picking up a new hobby, or reengaging with an old hobby or trying new recipes. I know I mentioned that one already because it is something that I really enjoy, creating these challenges so that we can then accomplish them and experience the high that comes with that. You, Jen, also mentioned something on another podcast that I love, hunting at the library, which I really do. I haven't tried this one, but I do think it would work for me. Going somewhere like a library where the things there are free, but you get to hunt around for the thing that you're looking for. So I'll take cooking again as an example. Let's say you want to look for a new recipe, head to the cooking section and hunt not just look. Hunt for a book that looks really interesting to you and maybe shows a skill set that you haven't tried before. Rent that puppy out. You can also ask the library for what other types of things they rent out. The library. You all know this. They do not only rent books. It's not just about books at the library. They rent resources of all sorts.
- [35:12]
Jen
Museum tickets.
- [35:12]
Jill
They rent out museum tickets, local stuff that's happening in your area. So treat the library like your own. Little. Your little hunt crap for a discount. Yeah, there's so much happening.
- [35:24]
Jen
It's fantastic. And I would say my charge also is to. It's kind of like an anti solution, anti alternative is to stop getting the deals. Deals are tools, not trophies. So being proud of a deal is. It's a marketing tactic that businesses use. They would not do sales if it was not proven to get you to impulse buy more. And we, we talk about an exact story of J.C. penney and this, this crazy story about how people stop when J.C. penney stopped doing sales and just lowered their prices. People stopped shopping there. And when they raised the prices and brought back the deals, they started again. And it is insane. So I would also challenge you to just shop apart from deals and maybe detox yourself off of that.
- [36:30]
Jill
Yes, yes.
- [36:32]
Jen
And deals are tools.
- [36:34]
Jill
Yes, yes. I love that perspective. And that's so, so helpful. I also will say that I think something that comes along with knowing ourselves, identifying our impulse spending, it doesn't mean that we have to totally abandon an enjoyment of making our money go further. So yes, I love deals, but I'm not impulse shopping them anymore. It has more so led to patience, knowing what I want, keeping a list, and then I am able to take advantage of the deal. So I still love them. I can still recognize that many are marketing ploys. But for instance, just this week we've been in need of a new door. That's hurricane glass, an exterior door. Eric found one on clearance, an original $6,500 door. And we got it for 1,000. So like. And that's not a marketing ploy, right? That's Home Depot, who had a return sitting on their shelf for three months that nobody else wanted to buy. And we, we've been checking back on this store weekly for months now. I am glad that this is over because this has taken up too much of our time. Eric's been like obsessed with this store. But because we were able to kind of hold it with an open hand, keep an eye on it, keep talking to the manager, we got it. For what kind of discount is that? 80% less than like its actual sticker price. So things like that do exist, but you're not going to just get that on a whim. Those types of things happen when you know what it is that you need. You are setting some money aside, you're implementing some patience on it. You are looking and sometimes, sometimes it goes your way. Yeah, so that's my, that's my other side.
- [38:26]
Jen
No, I'm with you 100%. I'm with you on doing it that way.
- [38:31]
Jill
For we are the same. We are becoming the same.
- [38:34]
Jen
We're becoming the same person at. That's becoming a problem. All right, so the last one we will talk about is social influence. So this is something that not necessarily social influence in being traditionally influenced by user generated content. So we have really seen this trend towards aesthetic and perfectionism like in social media, having these aspirate, having this aspirational content and or even non aspirational content, just generalized content in a really aesthetic vibe. And that has led to people trying to recreate it or feeling inadequate and not bringing people into their home because they believe all they're seeing is these really aesthetic homes on social media and they believe their home is inadequate. And we have found that is leading to a lot more impulse spending than somebody doing an unboxing video or a paid ad that is clearly, you know, they're just hawking product for money. Right. So this is something that's much deeper for me. During our home renovation, we lived in a live in flip for two years and I followed a lot of interior designers because I'm not an interior designer by nature. I don't know what looks good. And the problem was is that these people have these funds to do this because it's their job, right? And then they know what to do. I was looking. I did not have the funds that they have because it is not my job or my gift. And if I'm trying to recreate this in a way that is affordable for me, just not identical to them, how do I know when it's done? How do I know when it's enough? And I could just keep buying and buying and buying, trying to recreate all these different influencers, you know, tips. But at the end of the day I had to decide when my house was decorated and done and also be patient and know that it's done for now. And if I see this one thing, then I could add that. But like that's finite. It's not like for the rest of my life I'll just see things and be like, oh, that looks good. I'll add that. I have to know what it is.
- [41:18]
Jill
Yeah. Oh, that's interesting. I feel like it kind of ties in with a bit of the habit. Spending loosely in.
- [41:25]
Jen
That could be. Yeah.
- [41:26]
Jill
We may start following an account for a certain season to help us in that season, and then we keep following them, but now it's no longer serving us. It's just making us more envious or thinking that what we have isn't enough. And we. And we also have to keep redecorating, re Renovating, redoing. Rather than calling it this. This is a good representation of me. I'm done. I no longer need to be buying these things anymore. I know we experienced that in the midst of our renovation, too. We were so used to just dropping all this cash that we had set aside for the renovation every weekend, going to Lowe's and Home Depot, and then suddenly, when no we are done, the big parts of the renovation are over. We really had to identify when that hard stop was when. No, now this is no longer a need for the renovation anymore. We can be patient for the finishing touches that now need to happen. The same thing. I think social influence can play into that.
- [42:27]
Jen
Same thing happened with Close for me after I had my second child and I was dressing this new postpartum body and I wanted to feel good about myself. That was a good thing for that season. But then I had to. Once I had bought a few new pieces, I had to stop and say, like, okay, the rest of this, I'm gonna wait until I find something secondhand or some, you know, poshmark, whatever, thrift store. So, yeah, setting that. It is such a balance. Right. That's why we say, for me, impulse spending is never going to go away because I have this list in the back of my mind of things that I'm willing to buy unplanned if I see it available secondhand or as a deal. But if it's not on the list, it's not getting bought.
- [43:21]
Jill
Yeah. Yeah. And I think that's a good call for curating who you follow. It's a good reason to take inventory regularly, maybe every few months. Is this still helping me? Or is this maybe making me feel discontent, like what I have isn't enough, maybe prompting me to spend more than I want? But also, this happens in our own communities as well. We see what our neighbors have, we see what our friends have. And maybe they're not living in this beautifully curated aesthetic, but we could see the things that they have that are maybe making their lives a little bit more efficient. And we want that thing too. And that comes down to really understanding our own values and our own goals with money. So that we can say better yeses, easier no's to these things. That the purchasing opportunities that we are presented with every single day, that social influence will always be all around us, but we will feel more confident in what we say yes to when we know what we want to be doing with our money.
- [44:26]
Jen
You know, one thing I want to.
- [44:28]
Jill
Be doing with my time.
- [44:31]
Jen
Yeah. That I do every week and I do it intentionally.
- [44:35]
Jill
The bill of the week.
- [44:40]
Dr. Laurie Santos
This is the bill of the week. This is the bill of the week. That's right. It's time for the best minute of your entire week. Maybe a baby was born and his name is William. Maybe you paid off your mortgage, maybe.
- [44:58]
Jill
Your car died and you're happy to.
- [44:59]
Dr. Laurie Santos
Not have to pay that bill anymore. Duck bills, Buffalo Bills, Bill Clinton. This is the bill of the week.
- [45:08]
Jen
Hi, Jen and Jill. This is Holly from St. George, Utah. And I just wanted to share my really exciting bill of the week. So we got the notice that our car insurance was going to be auto renewing in a week or so and it was really expensive. And so I started just shopping around for different insurances. And by just spending a couple of hours looking around, I was able to switch car insurances and save my husband and I over 600. So that is my bill of the week. Thank you. Yes. Holly, this is your reminder out there. If you have not shopped your car insurance this year, it's time, it's time to do it. Do it this month and see what else is out there. They will prorate and yeah, just do it.
- [46:05]
Jill
Yeah, you don't have to wait until your insurance renews. This is something you can do any time of the year and compare and like you said, you know, even get some money back even if you've paid in advance. One of the resources that, that we have that we would recommend for being able to do this Even faster is Policygenius. So frugalfriendspodcast.com Policygenius will help you to be able to compare different insurance prices. So thank you so much, Holly. What a great reminder. If you all are listening to this bill and you have a bill about shopping around, negotiating, lowering your bills or a bill you don't mind paying or your, your bill who pays his bills, your bill who doesn't pay his bills. You just bill living your bill life.
- [46:53]
Jen
Or maybe you want more bills to be able to make an impulse buy. Go get less expensive auto insurance and use the money you saved to buy yourself something nice.
- [47:06]
Jill
Wow. Frugalfriendspodcast.com bill leave us your bill Introducing.
- [47:12]
Dr. Laurie Santos
Signals, the next generation of platforms for investors designed to elevate your trading strategy by giving access to insights used by Wall street pros to dominate the market. Signals uses its proprietary data of $70 billion in consumer spend across North America to spot market trends before they make the headlines. We bring you the alternative data that drives decisions at top hedge funds, allowing you to carve your own edge in the stock market. Join the insider circle who are already transforming their investment strategies. Visit joinsignals.com to start your free 14 day trial. No hidden fees, no gimmicks, just pure actionable insights. End your reliance on outdated information with Signals. Invest like a pro, make informed decisions swiftly and stay ahead of the curve. Uncover tomorrow's market moves with today's real time data. Visit joinsignals.com today.
- [48:12]
Jill
Hi everyone. It's Savannah Guthrie and Hoda Kotb from the Today Show. We love this time of year. There's so much to celebrate. That's right.
- [48:20]
Jen
Nobody, nobody does the holidays quite like.
- [48:22]
Jill
Today all season long. Join us for special performances with the brightest stars, plus festive recipes to whip up the perfect holiday feast and great deals on the hottest toys and gifts for everyone on your list. So join us every morning on NBC to make TODAY your home for the holidays.
- [48:41]
Dr. Laurie Santos
This is Dr. Laurie Santos from the Happiness Lab. Many people have questions about how to improve levels of happiness, and there are a lot of different ways. Happiness is unique to each individual, but living a healthy lifestyle is one sure way of increasing happiness. And a good place to start is with your oral health. Just a few small changes to your oral care routine, such as changing your toothpaste to Colgate Total, can lead to beneficial changes in your oral health. Colgate Total helps stop oral health problems like gingivitis and cavities before they start. Before they start is an important part because preventing oral health problems is a lot easier than treating them. So for a happier, healthier you use Colgate Total and actively help prevent oral health problems like gingivitis and cavities. You'll be happy you did. Be dentist ready and get colgate total@shop.colgate.com Total gifting is hard, but here's a Give the gift of connection from US Cellular. Not sure what that means? Here's a slightly more specific hint. You can choose four free phones and get four lines for $90 a month from US Cellular. Your family wants new phones.
- [49:50]
Jen
How do we know?
- [49:51]
Dr. Laurie Santos
They told us.
- [49:52]
Jill
The good news is that compared to.
- [49:53]
Dr. Laurie Santos
Wrapping presents, you're great at getting hints. So take the hint and get them four free phones and four lines for $90 a month US cellular built for us. Joel, as you know, my father served in the military. He was in satellite communications. Satcom. I'm not sure if that's what they still call it these days.
- [50:11]
Jen
Sounds cool.
- [50:12]
Dr. Laurie Santos
But when I think about him truly and the other veterans I know, I'm reminded of their quiet strength, their resilience. Those are some of the qualities they carry with them long after their service ends. Well, at Navy Federal Credit Union, every day is Veterans Day, and they are proud to have served the military community for over 90 years.
- [50:30]
Jen
Veterans Day only highlights Navy Federal's everyday commitment because Navy Federal serves more than 2 million veterans by providing the support.
- [50:38]
Dr. Laurie Santos
They need to succeed financially.
- [50:39]
Jen
They offer members exclusive rates, discounts and perks.
- [50:43]
Dr. Laurie Santos
And 45% of their employees are directly tied to the military.
- [50:47]
Jen
So Navy Federal understands the needs of.
- [50:49]
Dr. Laurie Santos
The veterans they serve. That's right. Navy Federal donates to not for profits focused on veterans like the mission continues and rebuilding together. It's good to see an organization prioritize those who have served our country and remember that active duty veterans and their families can join Navy Federal Credit Union. Learn more@navy federal.org veterans Navy Federal is insured by NCUA.
- [51:13]
Jill
And now it's time for the lightning round.
- [51:19]
Jen
All right, when do you allow yourself to make impulse purchases? This is our vulnerability round. I think I. So we've been quite transparent in the fact that we make impulse purchases. There is no room for planning 100% of your purchases, which is why we don't love traditional budgets. We definitely have our own way of budgeting or as we say, making a spending plan, which we talk about in the book. So I would say again, the list and I know you're going to do it. Okay, yeah, say it. I have the things in the back of my head that I know I will spend money on if the opportunity arises. The list is short. It's very short. And I keep it short so that I can change. Like I can reconsider if something should even be on the list. I will keep wish lists on Amazon for things for a very long time and wait for them to go on sale. But very often sales on Amazon are not real. It's usually a price increase to show a decrease. So, yeah, it has. And that's one of the. There's been such a rise in deceptive sales marketing that. And I read about it so much that now sales infuriate me. And that's one of the reasons that I just don't like sales. But I do wait. If. If I can get a deal, I know I can get a deal. I will wait. So. Yeah, I just. It's my list.
- [53:09]
Jill
Yeah. For me, there's a couple of things that. That converge with my impulse spending. And the first is similarly my list. I do have to write it down. My brain just doesn't. It doesn't work the way I want it to. And I just pulled it up right now to see, okay, what do I have on the list? A TV console table. This has been on the list for years. I don't think I'm finding it. I should probably. And the reason I'm not erasing it is because I actually have the measurements. So that's something else I'll do. Like, if there's a piece of furniture that I want, I will put the measurements in the note for, like, what could fit there. So if I am out at a thrift store or yard sale or, you know, me and I find something. We also keep a tape measurer in our vehicle that I can make sure that that thing would. Would fit for what I'm looking for. Haven't found one. We've lived without it for years, so I don't know if we're doing that.
- [54:03]
Jen
I got Travis a tape measure keychain for that very reason.
- [54:08]
Jill
Yep. You always need one. Black boots. And these have been on my list for also over a year, in part because I really like the black boots I already have. But the heel. The, like, coating on the heel is all, like, flaking off. And so there is a part of me, like, I've been on the hunt. I cannot find anything that I even like, much less in a price range that I'm willing to pay. But I love the ones I currently have that I'm starting to wonder if I just need to take them to a shoe repair place and see if they could do something to the heel of them. I think they bet they could. But then the heel is just some sort of, like, rubber that was stuck onto it and is now peeling off. And so it's yellow underneath. Like, it's not like, oh, it peels off, but it's still, you know, the black color. It's not the case. So. Yeah, and lip balm and greeting cards. So we'll see. They do have greeting cards at Walmart which is normally where I get my groceries, but I don't like them. So that's.
- [55:16]
Jen
They will often have greeting cards at the thrift store.
- [55:19]
Jill
Exactly. I will check the thrift store as well. Something else I will also do is just give myself loose parameters. And so like that's something that specifically I'll do with my grocery list is write down some sort of category of something, but then allow myself the opportunity to see what strikes my fancy once I'm there. So I feel like that kind of also scratches the itch of wanting to just be at my whimsy, just fly by the seat of my pants. It'll be like, okay, I want some sort of frozen food option. I don't exactly know what it's going to be. I'm going to let myself decide when I'm there. I want two snacks of some sort. Gonna let myself decide what those snacks are when I'm there. So that even helps to feed a little bit of that desire to just like, don't let, don't confine me, don't pin me down. Let me have some choices. But it's still within the spirit.
- [56:18]
Jen
But it also keeps you from coming home with like six snacks because you didn't give yourself a limit. So thank you so much for listening. We hope that this helped you identify some of the impulses, spending triggers that you have and can help you make one or two changes heading into the new year. And if this really helped you, I highly, highly encourage you to preorder our book. It comes out so soon. Buy what you love without going broke. Buy what you love book dot com. And also if you already have pre ordered the book, leave us a rating and review on Apple or Spotify. We love to read them. Kind of like this one from Raspberry H. They say obsessed happens to be five stars. I'm so obsessed with this podcast. I listen to every episode, even if it doesn't sound like something that would interest me because Jen and Jill are just so fun to listen to. It's like chatting with some friends. I learned so much about saving money and being more conscious of my spending. It's amazing that they've done so many episodes and still haven't run out of things to talk about.
- [57:26]
Jill
Yeah, so true. Raspberry H. Thank you so much for your kind words and I'm so glad that you're listening to to us every single time. Even if it doesn't interest you, I'm glad you're here. Hopefully there's still little nuggets for You. And no, we're not running out of stuff to talk about because we're not running out of stuff to spend on.
- [57:45]
Jen
Yeah, we'll be here.
- [57:47]
Jill
As long as we keep spending money and wondering how can we get food for less expensive, we'll continue to be here.
- [57:55]
Jen
Absolutely. So until then, see you next time.
- [57:58]
Jill
Leave us a rating and review and buy what you love. Booked dot com. Bye.
- [58:03]
Jen
Frugal Friends is produced by Eric Sirianni.
- [58:17]
Jill
What is the last thing you've you impulse bought?
- [58:21]
Jen
Ooh. At the grocery store? I. I grocery shop online. It limits impulse spending. But I have been seeing this protein bar circulating, the built puff. So I ordered that because I wanted to try it.
- [58:43]
Jill
Yeah. How is it?
- [58:46]
Jen
I haven't tried it. Oh, I just picked up my groceries yesterday.
- [58:50]
Jill
Okay.
- [58:50]
Jen
So I haven't tried it yet, but it was. It sat in my cart for a little bit for a week. Like I add. I add things into the cart and then, you know, throughout the week and then review it before I check out. And I still wanted them after a week, so I bought them. So.
- [59:10]
Jill
Nice.
- [59:11]
Jen
Yeah. There we go. What about you.
- [59:16]
Jill
Potentially, Would this count? This morning, Eric and I were on our way home from an appointment and we just decided to stop in at the local donut shop and pick up some sausage rolls, which are really hot dog hot dogs wrapped in croissants.
- [59:35]
Jen
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
- [59:36]
Jill
And a donut.
- [59:37]
Jen
It's a. Yeah.
- [59:38]
Dr. Laurie Santos
Mm.
- [59:39]
Jen
It's like a big pig in a blanket.
- [59:41]
Jill
And I knew you were gonna be here today, so I asked if you wanted something.
- [59:45]
Jen
Cause, you know, I love them.
- [59:46]
Jill
You also want the jalapeno sausage roll. The thing about. Yeah, I mean, this is why it's so kind of loosey goosey to me a little bit is we do have an eating out portion of our spending plan. So it does fall into that. But it wasn't something that we had planned to go stop at the donut shop. So I don't know. I think there's so much flexibility with it too, that we can even just make room for our impulse spending knowing rather than working against ourselves entirely knowing it's going to happen and allowing yourselves the freedom to do it then when you want to. Within reason.
- [60:29]
Jen
Yeah. Do it in a more controlled environment that involves a little sacrifice from maybe the way you were living before, but ultimately makes you feel better and is not the deprivation that comes with the other extreme.
- [60:47]
Jill
Well, I gotta go eat my sausage roll now.
- [60:50]
Jen
Go for it. I already ate mine.
- [60:51]
Jill
Yum.
- [60:52]
Dr. Laurie Santos
This message is sponsored by Greenlight we all know that old saying about teaching Amanda Fish, and as parents, we want our kids to learn the things that will set them up for success. So this holiday season, give kids money skills that will last well beyond 2024 with Greenlight. Greenlight is a debit card and money app made for families where kids learn how to save, invest and spend wisely.
- [61:13]
Jill
With parental controls built in.
- [61:15]
Dr. Laurie Santos
Sign up today@greenlight.com iheart greenlight.com iheart.
- [61:22]
Jen
Hey, it's Angela Yee searching for the perfect gift this holiday season. Celebrate with Born in Roma perfumes by Valentino Beauty. Discover the Born in Roma scent collection at Sephora Born in Roma by Valentino Beauty for her, for him, for them.
- [61:38]
Dr. Laurie Santos
For many of us, the holiday season means more travel, more shopping, more time online and more of your personal information in more places you can't control. It only takes one innocent mistake, even if it's not your mistake, to expose you to identity theft. Not to worry. Lifelock monitors hundreds of millions of data points every second and alerts you to threats you could miss by yourself. Even if you keep an eye on your bank and credit card statements, if your identity is stolen, your own US based restoration specialist will fix it, guaranteed. The last thing you want to do this holiday season is face drained accounts, fraudulent loans or other financial losses from identity theft all alone. Gift yourself the peace of mind that comes with Lifelock and spend more time doing more of the holiday things you love. Visit lifelock.com iheart and save up to 40% your first year. That's 40% off@lifelock.com iheart LifeLock for the threats you can't control. The holidays are here and Sonos is your go to for elevating the season. Whether you're hosting a festive gathering or searching for the perfect gift, Sonos has you covered. Fill your home with high quality sound fine tuned by award winning artists, producers and sound engineers. Enjoy your favorite holiday music and movies with a cinematic sound experience right from your couch. Plus, Sonos products work together seamlessly, allowing you to create a beautiful sound system. Visit sonos.comstan to complete your holiday shopping at Amika Insurance. We know it's more than just a car or a house. It's the four wheels that get you where you're going and the four walls that welcome you home. When you combine auto and home insurance with Amica, we'll help protect it all. And the more you cover, the more you can save Amica. Empathy is our best policy.