She Spent HOW MUCH on Gifts!?!? | Spending Intervention

Summary

Frugal Friends Podcast: Detailed Summary of "She Spent HOW MUCH on Gifts!?!? | Spending Intervention"

Release Date: July 18, 2025

Introduction

In this engaging episode of the Frugal Friends Podcast, hosts Jen Smith and Jill Sirianni delve into a real-life financial intervention with a guest who grapples with managing her spending, particularly on gifts. The episode, titled "She Spent HOW MUCH on Gifts!?!? | Spending Intervention," provides listeners with insightful strategies to gain control over their finances without sacrificing the joy of giving and socializing.

Guest Background [02:30]

The guest, a 30-year-old homeowner from St. Petersburg, Florida, shares her lifestyle details to set the context for her spending habits. Having owned her home for four years and currently living with a roommate, she is navigating the financial responsibilities of homeownership while maintaining an active social life.

Positive Spending Habits [03:22]

Jen and Sam commend the guest for several commendable financial practices:

• Using a Credit Union [03:46]: "Using a credit union for your checking account... is the best place to keep it." This choice not only supports community investment but also often offers better rates and lower fees compared to traditional banks.

• Low Utility Bills [04:10]: Jen highlights the guest’s efficient use of utilities, noting, "Your utilities from car insurance, electric, water are below average for the City of St. Pete." This reflects prudent management of regular expenses.

• Frequent Returns [04:42]: Sam points out the guest’s habit of returning unused purchases, which promotes a clutter-free and financially sensible household.

• Thoughtful Gift Giving [05:15]: The guest’s pre-ordering of a book demonstrates intentional spending on items she values, aligning with Jen’s praise: "Buy what you love without going broke."

Areas for Improvement [08:43]

Despite these strengths, the guest acknowledges several areas where her spending could be optimized:

• Frequent Grocery Trips [09:19]: Visiting the grocery store 29 times in 90 days amounts to approximately $420 monthly. The guest attributes this to her busy social schedule and the need to cook for others frequently.

• Food and Drink Expenditures [10:17]: With 38 transactions in this category over 90 days, totaling $1,259, the guest spends about $756 monthly on consumables, which includes both shared meals and personal outings.

• Credit Card Fees [31:16]: Annual fees from multiple credit cards, including a $95 Marriott fee, contribute unnecessarily to monthly expenses, especially when not fully utilized for travel benefits.

• Home Warranty Costs [38:54]: Paying nearly $1,000 annually for a home warranty that has only occasionally been beneficial raises concerns about its cost-effectiveness.

Dealing with Financial Anxiety [14:56]

The guest opens up about her anxiety surrounding finances, rooted in her upbringing. "I grew up in a household that was very strict about money," she shares, explaining how her parents' frugality has influenced her own financial behaviors. This anxiety manifests in her reluctance to track expenses meticulously, preferring instead to stay within an estimated budget to avoid stress.

Recommendations and Strategies [50:00]

Jen and Sam offer practical solutions to help the guest manage her finances more effectively:

1. Establishing an Emergency Fund [19:35]: Building a safety net to cover unexpected home repairs would alleviate much of the guest’s financial stress related to homeownership.

2. Implementing a Spending Plan [19:46]: Contrary to the guest’s fears, a structured spending plan can provide freedom by clearly allocating funds for necessities, savings, and discretionary spending.

3. Meal Planning and Reducing Grocery Trips [62:12]: Enhancing meal planning routines to minimize unnecessary grocery store visits can significantly cut costs. Jen suggests, "Find a different meal planning method or execute for a set period to bolster your emergency fund."

4. Reassessing Credit Card Usage [31:07]: Evaluating the necessity of each credit card, especially those with annual fees, and considering cancellation if they do not provide adequate benefits.

5. Creative Fulfillment of Ideas [57:08]: Encouraging the guest to use existing resources before making new purchases can help curb impulsive spending. For example, instead of buying a new griddle for smash burgers, they could utilize a cast-iron pan already available.

6. Home Warranty Evaluation [39:12]: The hosts discuss the pros and cons of maintaining a home warranty versus self-insuring for major repairs, emphasizing the importance of understanding coverage limitations and actual savings.

Notable Quotes

• Sam [03:45]: "There's no shame or guilting in this. If we bring something up, it's not to make you feel bad or like you want to quit spending on it."

• Jen [05:15]: "Buy what you love without going broke."

• Guest [15:06]: "I don't ever want to feel like I'm restricted and not having fun."

• Sam [19:46]: "A spending plan gives us the freedom to spend, and it frees us from anxiety because we know that we can afford the things that we value."

• Jen [28:40]: "If it's not a great idea for you, finding that permission to break the rules and discover."

Conclusion

The episode concludes with Jen and Sam expressing appreciation for the guest’s vulnerability and openness in discussing her financial challenges. They reinforce the importance of setting personal financial goals, such as an emergency fund and a tailored spending plan, to empower listeners to manage their money effectively without sacrificing the joys of life.

Final Thoughts from the Guest [68:54]

The guest reflects on the insights gained, acknowledging that while she values her social interactions and gift-giving, there are tangible strategies she can implement to achieve a healthier financial balance. "I feel like there are some things I didn't think about... it's tough processing what needs to change while maintaining what I truly want."

Takeaways

Listeners can learn valuable lessons from this episode, including:

• The significance of an emergency fund in reducing financial anxiety.
• The benefits of a structured spending plan in achieving financial goals.
• The importance of reassessing financial commitments like credit card fees and home warranties.
• Creative strategies to fulfill personal desires without impulsive spending.
• Balancing generosity and social life with prudent financial management.

This episode serves as a relatable and informative guide for anyone striving to control their spending, embrace minimalism, pay off debt, or reach financial independence—all while maintaining a fulfilling and joyful life.

Transcript

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[Sam]

So how much do you think, how much did you think you were like maybe spending per month on going out than just you?

[Guest]

I have to be honest, I have no idea.

[Jen]

Welcome to the Frugal Friends podcast where you'll learn to save money, embrace simplicity.

[Guest]

And live a richer life.

[Jen]

Here are your hosts, Jen and Jill.

[Sam]

Hey Sam.

[Guest]

Hello.

[Sam]

Thank you so much for agreeing to to come on and we're excited to look at your spending.

[Guest]

Yeah, thanks for being here.

[Jen]

Can you just share a little bit about yourself like an overview of some of the some of the stats?

[Guest]

Sure. I am 30 years old. I am living here in St. Petersburg, Florida. Been here for like 10ish years. I'm a homeowner. I bought a home 4 years ago almost which is crazy. And I am not currently married but I am dating and hopefully heading in that direction. Yeah so I live with a roommate currently and we've. I've had a roommate almost the entire time that I've been a homeowner, so that's super helpful. Awesome. Yeah, awesome.

[Jen]

We had a great time going over your 90 day spending inventory, so thanks for sending that over. Some really cool things stood out to us.

[Sam]

Yeah. And so I want to first just like lay on the table. Like, there's no shame or guilting in this. If we bring something up, it's not to make you, like feel bad or like want to quit spending on it. We just want to give you, like, ideas, strategies, new ways of thinking to improve your spending.

[Guest]

Yeah.

[Sam]

So I wanted to start with some good things that we saw on the inventory. And the first one is using a credit union for your checking account.

[Guest]

Yeah.

[Sam]

That is an amazing place to keep your money that credit unions invest in their communities. And if you're gonna keep your money anywhere, I really think a credit union is the best place to keep it.

[Jen]

It was also really cool to see all of your, like, utilities from car insurance. Electric water is below average for the.

[Sam]

City of St. Pete.

[Jen]

And so you seem to be doing really well.

[Guest]

So that's good news that you don't know. Yeah. Right.

[Jen]

I was looking at your water bill.

[Guest]

I'm like, oh, dang it, what do.

[Sam]

We got to do to lower ours?

[Jen]

That is good.

[Sam]

And that's your entire water bill. Not like any contribution from your roommate. So, like for two people using electric and utilities. Great.

[Guest]

Cool.

[Sam]

Yeah. And so I also saw lots of returns and we'll get into like why that is. But a lot of people will buy things and then not like it and wait past the 30 days or just not have the initiative return. And like, it really looks like if you're not going to use something or something doesn't work, you return it, you get it out of your house. And that's not always a common thing. So that is a really good thing we saw.

[Guest]

Yeah.

[Jen]

And my absolute favorite thing that we saw in your spending inventory was buy what you love without going broke. You pre ordered our book.

[Guest]

Oh, yeah.

[Jen]

So fun. Even on the line item. You wrote it in August.

[Guest]

Cats book, pre order.

[Jen]

So well done on that spending.

[Guest]

No problem.

[Jen]

I will also say I noticed just a lot of giving, a lot of thoughtfulness towards other people. Certainly part of the 90 day transaction inventory includes Christmas. So there is just a lot of gift giving, I think, for all of us. But even aside from gifts for Christmas, there was a lot of buying coffees for other people or sending dinners to loved ones or treating somebody to this, buying something for somebody else so much was gift giving. And so I think that just shows, like, your social nature, your generous spirit, and that was really.

[Guest]

Thank you. Yeah, that is something I love to do. So.

[Jen]

But curious for you, what stood out as you went through it? Were there any surprises or any. Or confirmations?

[Guest]

I think it wasn't necessarily what I was spending on that was surprising. But, like, the number of times I bought groceries in the past three months was like, why am I at the.

[Jen]

Grocery store so much?

[Guest]

That was, like, one thing, which I do know that I guess I know that, like, I'm not. I've been trying to be a lot better about meal planning and, like, buying what I need at one time, but that fluctuates, like, depending on how busy I am. Because I am a very social person, so I tend to not be home a lot. Like, so I'll be out more and buy things, like when I'm passing by the grocery store, like, just stop in or whatever, because I didn't have time to plan something or, you know, whatever it is. So I. I definitely, like, looked at that was like, I buy a lot of groceries. Again, not. Not crazy, because I do cook a lot, and I do, like, I. I love to cook for other people, and I think acts of service is definitely, like, one of my love languages. So I tend to make things for people a lot, whether that's baking or cooking or whatever. So again, not like, crazy to spend money on that. But it was frequent, so that was interesting to see. I think that was probably the one that was, like, the most. The most out there, so to speak, for me. But other than that, I wasn't terribly surprised. Yeah, I don't feel like I have a lot of unknown things, which was. Actually, I was pretty sure about that. But when you're going in and you're looking at it, it can be a little bit like, oh, I don't know what I'm gonna find. And then I didn't really have that many things that I was like, I have no idea what that is. There were a couple things, but I don't think there were anything. It was nothing, like, large. It was maybe like, $20 here or there that I was like, maybe three or four times over the past three months that I was just like. I don't know what that was. Yeah. But it was nothing that I was, like, going on shopping sprees or anything, because I don't. I don't really shop. Like, I don't really go to, like, the mall or, like, anything like that where I would spend an exorbitant amount of money or, like, buy random things I don't really buy, like, impulsively, like, at, you know, wherever I'm going, I tend to go in and come back out. So that's like. That's, like, pretty good. And I go to Target a lot, but not for, like, Target things. Like, I feel like Target is one.

[Sam]

Of those things that, like, we categorized it in groceries.

[Guest]

Yeah, it's always. Yeah. Just because it's the closest to my house. And other than that, like, Publix is there. But Publix is so expensive, so I rarely go to Publix. But Target by me, has, like, a pretty good, like, produce section and stuff like that. So I tend to grocery shop there a lot. And the great thing about Target is if you're part of their program, they track all of your spending, like, on their app, so you can go back and look at exactly what you bought without having the receipt, which is nice. So, yeah, that's what I did for a lot of those. I was like, oh, yeah. Like, I just bought groceries, like, 95% of the time.

[Sam]

Groceries are the thing that we. One of the things that we noticed was most frequent. So we took some data.

[Guest]

Yeah.

[Sam]

And we'll share it with you. Okay, so groceries. In the last 90 days of your transaction inventory, you went to the grocery store 29 times.

[Guest]

Yeah.

[Sam]

So that's over twice a week going. And you spent a total of $1,259 on groceries. So that's about $420 per month on groceries. Is that just for you?

[Guest]

No, typically it's not. Almost always I'm cooking for someone else, whether that be for my boyfriend and I, or sometimes my roommate and this girlfriend will be there and I'll offer them food or my neighbors. A lot of times we'll share meals with them. Or if I'm going to our house, church, I always bring something. So a lot of times it's for, like, multiple people and not just myself.

[Sam]

Yeah.

[Guest]

So, yeah. And then I'm not personally eating $400 a month.

[Sam]

Yeah. Just wanted to, like, set that, like, get a good perspective. Food and drink was the other category that we saw most of. And so that was 38 transactions over 90 days. So that's about three times per week of going out. So something I was interested in. You have a boyfriend, so you're probably not, you know, doing. You're probably going out more than three times a week but not paying for all of it. How how do you think it stacks up between, like, how many times, like, he pays versus you? Is it kind of 50, 50, or is he a little bit more or less?

[Guest]

Definitely not 50, 50. He pays a lot more when we go out for, like, larger meals, like, I would say. So anything where we're going out to, like, a big meal, like a nicer restaurant or something like that, he's definitely paying for that. And then I try to pick up some of the smaller expenses, like lunch or, like, coffee or drink, like, cocktails or something out. Then I'll. I'll usually pay for, like, very small transactions in that. So like, maybe, like, the $30 and less range is typically me. And then he'll pay for, like, the larger meals.

[Sam]

Okay, so how much do you think. How much did you think you were, like, maybe spending per month on going out legit? Just you?

[Guest]

I have to be honest. I have no idea. I really don't. I hate expenses. Like, I hate reviewing my expenses. I hate finances in general. Like, to be completely honest, I, like, just tend to stay away from it as much as I can and just have, like, a. Okay. I don't think I'm gonna. Like, if. As long as I can pay my credit card bill, I'm good. Like, I don't know. Like, I just know approximately how much I make and approximately how much is going out every month. Like, I'll peek at my, like, total statements every once in a while, and, like, that's pretty much where I stand. Like, I don't tend to follow, like, strict budgets or, like, check in on it probably as much as I should, but I just. Yeah, I don't know. It gives me anxiety, and I just try to, like, if I could not look at finances, I would. I would be very happy with that.

[Jen]

Well, you're not alone in that. I think that is a lot of people's experience of, I don't want to look at this, and if I can just keep it within range, then it's totally fine. And so far, that seems to be working for you to a degree. Like, we've seen some really great things within your inventory, and thanks for being here, especially if it is one of those things that kind of stuff stir some anxiety. But I think, you know, as you've even said, once you do look at it, it's actually not as daunting as you had thought, and you're realizing, oh, I actually do have a decent handle on these things. However, in looking at it, there's still more you could learn about yourself and potentially See some shifts that could benefit you. But speaking of that, I'm curious from your perspective after reviewing the spending inventory, what, what you want to see going forward. Like, are there any areas that kind of rose to the surface where you are realizing, I think I might want to shift this, or here's what I want to see in my spending.

[Guest]

I don't know that there's specific goals. I think it has worked in terms of me being able to pay my bills month to month. I think with being a homeowner, there's a lot of things that pop up unexpectedly that if you're not a homeowner that you don't think about and that you like really are never prepared for, especially being a first time homeowner. So, like, I just had to replace my roof after our hurricanes and I've had some other like, random household things going on and having to deal, deal with that alone can be like, really, really stressful. Um, so I think more than anything, just like being able to be more prepared for those things would be nice. So it's like, although I am making it work, it's like stressful when it comes to times of like huge unexpected expenses, I think. But I don't know that there's necessarily specific things that I noticed or thought about cutting out or spending more on or like shifting necessarily, other than maybe being more prepared in the grocery category and making lists. So one, I don't consume all my time at the grocery store because who needs to be at the grocery store though? And two, like, yeah, just making sure I'm buying like best deals and like, you know, not over buying.

[Sam]

Have you, have you thought about like the source of your anxiety around money? Do you have an idea of like, maybe where that stems from?

[Guest]

I don't know. I grew up in a household that was like, very strict about money. Like, my dad was always very fine tuned in the finance category. Like, he's very good with money. He saves a lot of money. Like he was able to retire at 61, I believe. And he and my mom go on all kinds of vacations and stuff and they're like pretty much debt free other than like mortgages on several, you know, investment properties. So like, they have always been like very, very good with money, but also very, very strict with money. So I think part of it is like, I don't ever want to be strict with myself in a way. Like, I don't want to feel like I'm like, restricted and like not having fun and not like being able to just kind of like, live my life. Like, because it was. Although they were good with money, it was restrictive in a lot of ways. Like, it was almost just like, too much. Yeah, in a lot of ways.

[Sam]

Like, there definitely is a balance. Do your. Have you ever talked to your parents about that? Like, did they feel like it was restrictive?

[Guest]

I don't think. No. My dad definitely doesn't. I don't. I don't think that. I think that's worked for him and it. It. You know.

[Sam]

What about your mom, though?

[Guest]

Yeah, my mom's always one.

[Sam]

One feels that way and then the.

[Jen]

Others might have a different experience.

[Guest]

My mom is a very frugal person. She loves going to, like, thrift stores and things like that and has always boug secondhand and lived in a kind of a lower. Like, just like, never, like, spend extravagantly and go out or, like, do like, crazy extravagant things and spend a lot of money. Like, she's always also been in that realm of, like, not overspending on, like, nice dinners or, you know, like, going to the mall. Like, she can't fathom buying, like, a dress for more than, like, $20. $20. I was like, way too much. So I think she has a similar mindset about it.

[Sam]

There is a B. Because you just said now they get to go on all these cool vacations and your dad retired early.

[Guest]

Yeah.

[Sam]

So, like, yes, those are things. Like, now they're not restricted now that that short term restriction has led to more freedom. But there is always a balance because it can go too far. The pendulum can swing.

[Guest]

Yeah.

[Sam]

Too far both ways. And I see so often that generations will kind of like, skip too. So when our parents are very strict with money, we feel like, oh, we were restricted our whole lives, so now I'm going to treat myself to what I want. And then the opposite, when our parents are, like, very irresponsible with money, then we have this fear of lack and then we are, like, super savers. So.

[Guest]

Yeah.

[Jen]

See that happen a lot for you, Sam. Do you feel restricted in your own management of money? Like, do you still have that sense in you?

[Guest]

Yeah, I. I definitely. I feel like I'm very responsible with money. Like, I don't ever want to, like, just go. I don't ever. I'm never. I'm not like, pendulum swinging in the opposite direction by any means. Like, I'm not going and spending, like, thousands of dollars on a credit card.

[Jen]

Yeah.

[Guest]

Lavish vacations or something like that. Like, I'm definitely not, like, rebelling against that mindset in any way. But you Know, like, I. I do feel like I have. I never want to get to that point where I feel like I'm not like, living my life because I have all of these, like, strict rules and stuff like that, which I know is something that you guys are really, like, you know, like, passionate about. And I think it's just that I. I don't. Sometimes I don't know if I have the money to spend things, like, on something that I really, really want. Like, one of the. The purchases I know that is in this spending evaluation is that I bought a pair of shoes that I really wanted that were like, $160, I think, and I sat on that decision for a really long time, which isn't necessarily a bad thing, but part of it was because I didn't know if I had the money to spend on it. And it would. Would have been nice, like, kind of know, like, okay, I have this much extra money to spend this month on things that I really want or really need or whatever that are outside of my normal spending habits, you know, so those types of things, like, I feel like I'm very restrictive with myself about, like, just like, spending more than normal on something. For me, I struggle with that sometimes.

[Sam]

And. And something that can be a solution for anxiety about money, and that specific, like, struggle is a little counterintuitive. It's having a spending plan.

[Guest]

Yeah.

[Sam]

And having, you know, we call it a spending plan, also referred to as a monthly budget and then, you know, like, what you have. And so often we think of budgets as like, I'm shopping on a budget, meaning I'm shopping like, I'm buying as little as possible because I have a tight budget. In reality, for a lot of people, and I would say most frugal friends listeners, it is the opposite. A spending plan gives us the freedom to. To spend, and it frees us from anxiety because we know that we can afford the things that we value.

[Jen]

I'll also add, I think it's important what you've said about where you're seeing some of your anxiety about money coming from and, like, the restrictive nature and how you see that that's how it felt. As you observed, your parents engage with money. And so to have any degree of restriction can kind of feel that exact way. But I think, you know, a big key in that is just being able to identify that this is kind of where some of my money ide come from, but then being able to make it your own, because I would imagine that as a child, not knowing the reasons that your Parents are saying no, no, no to these different things. It just feels like it's untethered. What is this even for? But for you to be able to maybe create some of these parameters around your spending, but in your own story, your own way for specific reasons, like what you've said of I want to be able to buy the things that light me up, be able to give to my friends, feed multitudes of people, but also have the money to be able to pay for my housing expenses when something inevitably goes wrong as a homeowner. And so for you to be able to hold that tension and it not just be restriction for the sake of restriction, but maybe some really mindful choices tethered to wanting to be able to know I've got the money for these boots and I've got some money set aside for something breaking on my house. And I wonder if that could potentially create some freedom for you and like less anxiety around it.

[Sam]

Yeah.

[Jen]

So further thoughts, did you want to.

[Guest]

Share more data points?

[Sam]

Well, we'll just, I'll, I'll just wrap up with the groceries and food and drink and this is something that can help with the spending plan as well. You spent just over a thousand dollars on your part of food and drink, like going out expenses, which if that is less than half of what your overall spending, then that's between the two of you, over $2,000 a month for just the two of you. And so you can really reach some of the, you know, these anxiety releasing goals a little faster by getting creative with the groceries and the food and the drink. And we'll talk about some of those things later. But it averages to $756 per month on just consumables. So. And then yeah, I think we can move on to opportunities for.

[Jen]

Oh wait, I'm curious, how does that number sound to you?

[Guest]

It's interesting. Like it's not all that shocking because we do spend a lot of time out and I think we do spend a lot of time socially like with friends or whatever, like at breweries or coffee shops or you know, like going out to dinner with people. And like, I think part of that, I mean obviously it like you guys say, like there's always, every month is different and there's always like a birthday or a wedding or like events to celebrate. I think part of that is like we, we were traveling for half of Dec. Um, and like out at Christmas and like, you know, there, there's some pretty big holiday events in there that probably contribute somewhat to that. Not that that doesn't happen other times of the year. Um, so that doesn't, like, necessarily shock me for, like, the time of year, I guess. Um, but it is more than I would think my half would be for sure. For, like, knowing that he's spending just as much, if not more. Yeah, probably more, honestly, if we're being honest. Like. Yeah, I just, like, he won't let me pay for, like, really nice dinners, which we go to. Like, there's a local restaurant, Wild Child, which I think probably both of you are familiar with, which we don't actually get dinner there very often. But, like, we'll do, like, appetizers and drinks, which add up to, like, you know, over a hundred dollars very quickly. And we'll probably go there at least, like, once a month. And there's, like, other places that we go to. So I would.

[Sam]

A couple of your, like, purchases out.

[Guest]

Yeah.

[Sam]

Just for yourself were over a hundred dollars.

[Guest]

Yeah. I think there were a couple in there that were, like, dinner with friends for, like, their birthdays and stuff, which, again, happen all the time. So, like, that's not saying that that's not unusual. But I think when it's. When it's like, my friends, I'll. I'll pay. But, like, when it's for us, like, the two of us, he'll pay. So. Yeah, I mean, I think maybe that could definitely contribute to the overall.

[Sam]

And you love hosting people in your home.

[Guest]

Yeah.

[Sam]

So, like, obviously there are some things like birthdays, weddings, stuff like that. You can't change that narrative. You're going to be spending money on going out. But outside of that, hosting people in your home is, like, a great way to still get what you're craving with the community, but for less cost and letting people contribute to it. It also makes hosting less stressful when you don't have to cover everything. And I say that because that's something that you've expressed that you like to do and you're already doing it. So it is something that maybe you can shift to see. Okay, maybe next month. I'm just. I'm. I'm bringing it down to X. Hundred dollars.

[Guest]

Yeah.

[Sam]

In each category.

[Jen]

Another category that stood out as far as, like, potentially disproportionate degrees of spending to, like, your life stage was gifts. But again, you are very generous. But let's look at the data for a second.

[Sam]

You spent on Christmas.

[Jen]

It was Christmas.

[Guest]

Yeah. Yeah.

[Sam]

Right. Yeah. But. But everybody buys gifts for Christmas.

[Guest]

Yeah.

[Sam]

This is cool to everyone. What's your.

[Guest]

I would think, like, a grand. Okay. Yeah.

[Jen]

Okay.

[Guest]

Yeah. Honestly.

[Sam]

And why, and, and did you plan for a grand or like, the grand just happened? Did you're like, okay, I feel comfortable spending a thousand dollars on gifts.

[Guest]

I think, like, partially that was a number I had in my head. I don't think that was. Yeah, I think, like, I had, I have general numbers for each person. Typically, not like, like, if I see something that's like, right for them and like, a little bit more than I will spend that. But, like, typically I'm like, okay, like, I'm spending this much on my parents and this much on my niece and nephew and this much on my siblings and like, this much on my boyfriend and that type of thing. So I think I, I, that was like, about what I expected. Yeah. Yeah. Well, then you came, you came in under.

[Jen]

You saved money.

[Guest]

Yes.

[Jen]

So after returns, you spent $758 on gifts.

[Sam]

And how many people do you think you bought gifts for?

[Guest]

Oh, probably at least 10 to 12, because I have three siblings, a niece and a nephew. A nephew that I didn't purchase for. And then my boyfriend, my parents, and then two friends. So what about co workers? Oh, and my co workers.

[Jen]

Yeah.

[Guest]

So closer to 20. Yeah. But yeah, yeah, so like 20. Okay.

[Sam]

And that feels good. Like, how does that feel?

[Guest]

Oh, I love giving people. It's funny, I never characterize, like, gift giving as a love language for me, but it is something I enjoy doing. Like, I like people to feel special and, like, love for them to, like, feel important and just feel that, like, even if it's not even like a holiday or something like that. Like, I like to just give people little things to like, brighten their day.

[Jen]

Or, like, and we do see that throughout here, which is really great. And I think part of this conversation has to do with what do you want to see different here and for us to maybe highlight some of the areas where there could be some shifts, things to think about for next year. But there could also be areas where you're like, I love that. Nope, I am going to spend a thousand dollars on Christmas and we're going to figure out other ways to make sure that that is possible for me.

[Sam]

Where I can, like, save for my, my home and I can also give these gifts and I can cut other places that are less important.

[Guest]

Yeah, I would say that's something that, like, that I'm perfectly comfortable with. Like, I wasn't like, whoa, like, I didn't mean to do that, or like, I feel really stressed that I did that. Like, I would much rather. Awesome cut from Other places to like, to give to other people. And like my co workers, like, I don't, I actually work remote so I don't see them very often. But like we interact as a team really well and like I've become friends with a lot of them and one of them, I mean, even going to their wedding in October. So like we're, we're very close as a team. So although it's a little more complicated because we have to shift gifts to each other, we actually a lot of people.

[Sam]

Shipping was something that we saw. I was like, why are there so Many? There are nine shipping transactions over $64. But I will say this is something else that was a good thing that I saw. Like some of this gift giving was diy, Some of it was thrifted. Like, I love that you're sourcing gifts, like finding things you enjoy and not just like buying crap off of.

[Guest]

Yeah.

[Sam]

Because it feels like an obligation.

[Guest]

Yeah.

[Sam]

You want to like look a certain way by giving so many gifts.

[Guest]

Yeah.

[Sam]

Like it's thoughtful and sustainable and the shipping is just kind of one of those costs of doing that. You're still saving money relative to like so many people. They're like memes. They're like, you know, cart, $200 shipping, six, you know, like, delete, delete. Like. Yeah, I won't. Yeah, I won't be. Yeah. So this overall, I would say there was a lot of shipping costs.

[Guest]

Yeah.

[Sam]

But I'll pay. I would gladly see those payments because of what was being shipped.

[Guest]

Yeah, those, the shipping costs I think that were on here were probably mostly my, my co workers because they all live literally around the country. So that is the only way to send them. Yeah. And I did make them. So it was difficult to like, I couldn't just like order something.

[Sam]

Right.

[Guest]

So.

[Jen]

Right.

[Sam]

Okay. So let's talk about some of the ways that we might be able to improve cut costs so that we have more space for goals on the values based spending.

[Jen]

Yeah. So the first thought that kind of comes to mind for me in this is the credit card fee.

[Sam]

So I am also. This is one I want to talk about as well.

[Guest]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Jen]

So I'll, I'll queue it up. So there was a $95, I believe it was a Marriott credit card annual fee. But we also see throughout all of these transactions a couple of different credit cards being used. You've got a Southwest card, a Marriott card. Is there another card you would know?

[Guest]

Wells Fargo. Yeah.

[Jen]

Okay.

[Guest]

Yeah, yeah.

[Sam]

Oh, there's a discount in addition to your Debit card from your credit union?

[Guest]

I also.

[Sam]

Yes, four.

[Guest]

Because I have a Discover card too.

[Sam]

Yeah.

[Jen]

Okay. And you did do some travel over these last couple of months. However, we don't see any of that travel being through Southwest or staying at any Marriott places. So that is just something to be aware of and maybe have some curiosity around. Is this credit card actually serving me? Is this annual fee worth it?

[Guest]

Yeah. So I will actually say some of that's not in here because a lot of it is paid through my boyfriend. My boyfriend will pay for it and then I'll use like my rewards from Marriott or something like that. So like he's paying for it and then I'm.

[Sam]

Did you stay at any Marriott's even if it's not in here? Stay at any Marriott's or fly Southwest at all in the same.

[Guest]

Yeah. Okay, we did. Well, I don't know about the last 90 days, I can't remember but we might have flown Southwest at Christmas.

[Sam]

The reason we ask is that we love travel hacking. We love our work. I have a South, I have Southwest credit cards and I do Hyatt credit cards and I gladly pay the Hyatt annual fee.

[Guest]

Yeah.

[Sam]

The thing is, is that we want to see, this is 90 days. So there's you know, four quarters in a year. We want to see at least one stay and one flight from the card every quarter in order to justify an annual fee. And if we don't, the annual fee is not worth it because the real benefit of travel hacking and getting these cards is the welcome bonus. So we pay the annual fee for the first year we get this welcome bonus and then if we are not using the hotel or flight, then it's not really worth keeping that card. We want to do, we want to use another card to get the welcome bonus for, for those And Marriott Bonvoy program has historically has the worst point redemption value of all hotels. The one like, like shining spot of it is because there are so many Marriotts and Marriott like varieties. So if you're traveling to certain places, sometimes all you have is a Marriott. So but that's really something to look out for that you can save yourself a hundred potentially because I don't know if the Discover or the and the Wells Fargo have annual fees.

[Guest]

They don't.

[Sam]

Okay, so that's, but it's 200 a year because I know Southwest does have a fee.

[Guest]

So those actually I will say those were like exclusively what I used up until very recently because Southwest has become wildly more expensive like flying home. I originally From Maryland. So flying home to Baltimore, flying into Baltimore was almost exclusively, like, cheaper to fly Southwest almost every single time. You can get like round trip lights for 200 bucks, bags included, et cetera. So, like this past Christmas trip, I think we actually used breeze on the way up, and then I think we used something else on the way back. I can't remember if it was Southwest or not, but the flights were just like, astronomical. But historically, every single time I fly home, it's been Southwest.

[Sam]

But here's the thing with Southwest, you should never be paying for a flight because their credit card rewards are so good. And we have an episode coming up on how to travel hack with Southwest. Using buying Southwest flights in order to get rewards is not the correct use of travel hacking with Southwest cards because they are one of the best ones. Yeah, I could see you doing that with Delta or American or United. But yeah, there is a hack to getting southwest, like paying $11 for every Southwest flight through their credit card.

[Guest]

Yeah.

[Sam]

But if you're not getting that, it's time to cancel the Southwest card. Wait a year or two, I can't remember how many, and then get that welcome bonus again. So you can get that.

[Guest]

Yeah.

[Sam]

And you're not just you flying free for 11 for $11, but also a guest also flying.

[Guest]

Yeah.

[Sam]

With their companion pass.

[Guest]

The other part of that, though, is that, like, I've always been taught that having credit cards for long periods of time is like the way to build your credit. And like, I, those are like, I got both of those cards at the same time because I used to travel a lot for work. And so I used to have like an astronomical amount of points in both Marriott and Southwest. Like, I was a list for every single year for like four years. And then I was for Marriott, the like titanium, not like the super high, like where you have to spend like a bunch of money, but like, I would, I think it was like titanium with Marriott for like a really long time. So, yeah, those were like, cards that I, I've had probably for eight years now, nine years, something like that. So, like, they were two of the first credit cards I got like, on my own. So that's why I was like, I, I, I guess I've always been hesitant to like, cancel them because they are. What is your oldest credit card? My Discover card, because that's, and that's no annual fee I've ever gotten.

[Sam]

Okay.

[Guest]

When I was in college.

[Sam]

When do you plan on getting a new vehicle?

[Guest]

I just got one. So after a long time.

[Sam]

Right?

[Guest]

Yeah.

[Sam]

So you don't need a high credit score.

[Guest]

Yeah.

[Sam]

You're not planning to buy a house.

[Guest]

Yeah.

[Sam]

You're not planning to get an auto loan or HELOC home equity line of credit, any of those things.

[Guest]

So don't think so.

[Sam]

So you don't need a high credit score. So you don't need to be afraid of lowering credit. It's never worth paying money to keep a good credit score, especially if you don't need it. So it's worth kind of observing if you're no longer traveling a lot for work, if there are opportunities for better travel, hacking cards, then canceling those, not being afraid because your monthly mortgage payment keeps your updated credit payments on time. Credit payments. That is your main source of good credit right there.

[Jen]

Also, you do have quite a lengthy credit history at this point that like canceling one of these cards or two of these cards is not going to that significantly impact your credit score and the ability to build it back up. There are other ways that you can also maintain, you know, good credit between like how much of the credit you use versus your credit limit. So there are some different things that you could explore that I don't think that I'd be that concerned about it just tanking you.

[Sam]

Absolutely not. And you're keeping your longest, your oldest card, which is Discover. You're keeping both your no annual fee cards.

[Guest]

Yeah.

[Sam]

So. And you've got your home, you've got your car. So you will, you'll take a little dip. You'll bounce right back up though.

[Guest]

Good to know.

[Sam]

So next, and this is, this is the only like big thing, other big thing that we saw is your home warranty. So and the reason it's something that we want to talk about is because you're paying almost a thousand dollars a year for it. And you actually struggle with this one a lot.

[Guest]

Yeah.

[Sam]

You actually called somebody out through the home warranty company, paid more money and they weren't able to do anything for you.

[Guest]

Yeah.

[Sam]

So tell us about like how you feel about the home warranty and why you're keeping it. Like.

[Guest]

Yeah, I have struggled with this a lot because when I first moved into my home, my realtor, my parents, other people suggested that I get this home warranty because my home is, was built in the 50s, so it's older and there's older units. Like my, my hot water heater is older. My, what do you call it, air conditioning unit is pretty old and is likely to be need to be replaced soon. And just some other, you know, like appliances and things like that are definitely older in the home, which when I first moved in I had an issue, I've had two issues with my air conditioning unit where I had to call them and it was technically more cost effective to like, like for that month, like me paying, I think it's $80 a month plus like the hundred dollar fee to call them out was like way more effective because I think it would have been like $500 to fix whatever that was at that time. Which like over the year obviously, like I would have paid less to just pay 500 outright. I think what I worry about is like the big expense of like needing to replace my AC unit and I don't have 10 grand to replace my AC unit. So like if they, if that does go out, I call them to fix it and it's, you know, like the course of a year it's a thousand dollars versus like $10,000 to replace my AC unit. So I think that's what I'm most worried about. But then there's also the issue of like their limitations. Right. Like they will only fix certain things and they a lot of times won't replace things. They'll just like keep fixing it and that type of thing. So I go back and forth between like, is this worth it or is it not? And then it's also a contract based thing. So like I can't cancel it every time. I like, I'll like think about it and I'm like, oh, I should cancel that. And I'm like, oh, I can't cancel it until July or whatever. So then I like maybe forget about it. And then like something comes up and I'm like, oh, well, I just used, used that like a month ago, so maybe I should keep it.

[Jen]

Has it ever been proven beneficial to you?

[Guest]

Yeah, just in those first two. I think the first two years I had over.

[Sam]

So you've had your home for four years.

[Guest]

Yeah.

[Sam]

So you have paid them almost $4,000 at least 3, 500. Have they saved you $3,500?

[Guest]

No. No. Yeah. So yeah. But I, I struggle because I'm like, I literally don't have 10 grand to pay for.

[Sam]

But you could have $3,500.

[Guest]

Yeah.

[Sam]

And you got beyond your granny. It's not. How old are your AC and your water heater?

[Guest]

My AC unit is 13 years old and someone just basically came for a tune up and told me it was like imminently going to need to be replaced, which is. I get it tuned every year and they have not told me that before. Like the same company comes and this year they did tell me that. Which I like. Yeah, take it with a grain of salt. Like obviously they're gonna be like pitching you to sell something, but I do know that it is old and it has had several issues. So have you been able to confirm.

[Jen]

In the fine print that the home warranty would cover something like that? And I say this because a lot of times home warranties will not cover things where the damage can be pointed back predating the beginning of coverage.

[Guest]

They do. Yeah. Like, I think they don't have anything. Like you can't if it's predating coverage. Like I have checked that and they will give you. The thing with the AC unit is they'll give you like up to a certain amount. So I think it's up to like nine grand. They'll give you towards the AC unit itself. So.

[Sam]

And here's the thing, your AC unit will probably last you another five years. So you'll have paid them nine grand to replace your unit for nine grand. So you can save for it. It's just where are you saving? And yes, you don't have 10 grand. That is scary. But a 13 year old unit usually will have like two to five years left. Our AC last in, in our old house that was also built in the 50s, lasted 30 years.

[Guest]

Yeah.

[Sam]

So did our water heater. And that's an anomaly. I don't think they always last that long. But that's a range.

[Guest]

No, I'm not disagreeing. Like, I definitely have gone back and forth myself with like, should I keep it? Should I not? Like, I've gone back and forth a lot of times. I think it's the anxiety of like, like I've had a lot of roof issues recently and I've spent like, like 12 grand to replace my roof. And like I have two of my credit cards are zero percent interest credit cards. So I put my roof on there and I'm like slowly paying those off over the course of 15 months. So like the thought of what am I gonna do if that happens tomorrow? You know, is really daunting for me as a single individual in terms of like financial, you know, like state. The burden of that is huge. Like, I just don't know. Like, I would. Yeah. Like, like if tomorrow I woke up and my AC was not, not working, which in Florida is an emergency. Yeah, like I would, I don't know. Yeah, I would be calling Jill.

[Jen]

Yeah, I'll pick up that phone call. Yeah. And. And it could be for you that, you know, you're able to keep that home warranty for a time until you feel that you've got some comfort and stability to be able to let go of it. You know, like, we're not saying just slice and dice. We're talking gradual shifts where these shifts can be made. But from what we are seeing as an outsider's perspective is you do have the ability to set some of this money aside. Like if you do have the ability to give them $1,000 a year, you at least have the ability to save $1,000 a year if you weren't paying for that. But then also some of these other areas of the food, potentially some of the credit card fees, potentially some of the impulse spending, that that'll be kind of the next thing that we talk about. And over time, you know, maybe you can define what that number would be of. All right. If I can get this amount as a buffer for me, I might feel a little bit comfortable not giving my money away to this home warra that may or may not cover that picks and chooses the technicians that they send out. Those technicians may or may not be well equipped or trained to do the thing that I need them to do. And so it could just give you a little bit more autonomy.

[Guest]

Yeah.

[Sam]

Because yeah, you're not guaranteed that they will replace it.

[Guest]

Right.

[Sam]

They will always try to repair. And we have heard stories that sometimes you don't always get the same company coming out and sometimes you get a good company, but some years you might not get a good company and might break things when they're doing a repair. And then the warranty, the manufacturer warranty is then null.

[Guest]

Yeah.

[Sam]

So you can't even get anything from the manufacturer.

[Guest]

Yeah.

[Sam]

So you are always safer, self insuring in that area. But yeah, you have like four months to kind of sit with that and suss it out.

[Guest]

Yeah. I think. What is this? Sorry, this is like a longer conversation we need to probably have about a home warranty. But like part of it is also like, this sounds silly, but like two things. One, it's. There are so many opinions, like about how you should manage your home, how you should save, how you should prepare for the worst of like, especially in Florida with hurricanes and things like that, like what you should spend money on, what you shouldn't spend money on, like all of these things. And it's like you look to like your parents and my parents have a home warranty. So it's like I should do what they do. Like that type of thing is also difficult to parse out. Like if I'm not doing this. Am I then straying from like my parents advice and is that a bad thing? Like should I not do what they have proven works for them? Like that is also like challenging to parse out. And then the second part of that is, which I know is something you can kind of write about in your book, talk about in your book is like the like all or nothing. Like I feel like, okay, I'm only gonna spend or I'm only gonna save a thousand dollars a year. Like that's not enough for a whole AC unit. So it's like, why should I even try to do that when I can have the home warranty company who will replace it if it happens in a year? You know, like that's also like difficult of like I'm not gonna save $10,000 by tomorrow, so I should just keep paying over the course of time.

[Jen]

And I think that's where this conversation is so helpful because I don't think that there is necessarily a right or a wrong for you or overarching. Like I'm not going to sit here and say home warranties are a bad idea for all people. For some it's a great idea. For others, there might be other ways of going about it. From what I understand about home warranties is you primarily want them if you don't believe you can save up up your own money to make these repairs because over the span of time it's probably going to be a wash. And so I think that that question and even kind of across the board like doing research on what, what about home warranties? This is kind of what you're going to find the reason for having a home warranty to be. And so you have to do what's comfortable with you. But I think that concept that we do talk about in the book of Shuha Ri of follow the rules, break the rules, transcend the rules. And I can understand that discomfort that can come from this is what everybody else told me to do. But what if it doesn't feel like it's making sense for me? Because even before we brought it up, you said, yeah, I've questioned this constantly back and forth in my head. And it is a scary thing to kind of go against not only what your parents do, but what you've done for so many years and what has so far seemingly made sense. And it can be scary to pull some of these quote unquote wise decisions into question.

[Guest]

Yeah.

[Jen]

And I'm not going to say exactly what the right move is for you, but that it is worth questioning. It is worth doing the math. It may have been a great idea for your parents, but if it's not a great idea for you, finding that permission to break the rules and discover. It's also okay to fail in this process. It's also okay to make mistakes and need to potentially at times we, we might choose to take on debt again in the future because emergencies require it. Like we've got a much more flexible view of finances. But I think in that flexibility, being able to find your own autonomy.

[Guest]

Yeah.

[Jen]

Where you can feel really confident and it's not always just, I just have to do what I was told that.

[Guest]

Yeah. Yeah.

[Sam]

Okay. So let's talk about your next step, financial goals and then two ways that we can go about taking action to get closer to these. So from what I'm hearing, I think having an emergency fund is probably going to solve. Is going to be the one thing that might solve the most anxiety for you. And then also trying a spending plan, maybe you don't do a spending plan long term. Maybe you do it for three to six months so you can get a grasp on what's happening.

[Guest]

Yeah.

[Sam]

And then you kind of can naturally execute that. It doesn't have to be forever.

[Guest]

Right.

[Sam]

And I think that's kind of this all or nothing. Like once I live on a budget, I have to live on a budget forever. So am I hearing like emergency fund, anything else?

[Guest]

Are you.

[Sam]

How much non mortgage debt do you have? And any revolving debt.

[Guest]

My car. My car. And then if you. Yeah, like the money that I have on my zero interest credit cards, which is technically I guess not debt yet. Like I'm not paying interest on it.

[Sam]

But do you plan to have it paid off by the time interest starts?

[Guest]

Yeah.

[Sam]

Okay, great. And then car.

[Guest]

What's that interest rate at 6%.

[Sam]

Okay, so a smidge high, but like nothing worrisome. So I think the emergency fund might be a good first goal.

[Guest]

Yeah.

[Sam]

All right. So I think my, my first step might be. And this might make you feel a little confident. Maybe call around, pick three H Vac companies and three companies that install water heaters and get quote and figure out what the real cost to have those systems replaced will be. And that might be what we start with for an emergency fund. So it might be less than $10,000 for an H vac, might be more. We don't know. Did somebody just tell you it was going to be 10,000?

[Guest]

I mean, I think I know like anecdotally other people getting H Vac units and Then like the company that came out, they absolutely quoted me like, whatever, like top of the line thing that was like, they actually quoted me one for like $12,000. And I was like, yeah, I'm not doing that, but thank you.

[Sam]

But yeah, get some actual real life quotes so we know what we're working in, not just like generalizations. And then maybe that is the goal we start with for an emergency fund. Maybe we keep the home warranty and we. And that emergency fund is for other things. Or maybe we decide to forego the home warranty and we know the emergency fund is for those things. Regardless, an emergency fund will greatly ease your discomfort when you think about money.

[Jen]

Do I have the money for the shoes? Yeah, because that's really what works, right? I want to get the.

[Sam]

Because I can't, I can't buy the.

[Guest]

Do you see them?

[Sam]

Yeah, I can't buy the shoes because I don't have enough money because what if my AC breaks or something like that? We always have that. But when you have a spending plan and a sinking fund or an emergency fund in this case, we know that we have the money or don't have the money right now for the shoes.

[Jen]

And as far as where you find this emergency fund money, yeah.

[Guest]

I'm like, this is great, but where.

[Jen]

Does it come from? I'll let you talk about the food. But one other thing I wanted to point out.

[Sam]

You had a really good insight.

[Jen]

I think honestly is really adorable and I see it in myself. Well, it's adorable because I see it in myself. That's not. Well, here we are. Here's where I find myself.

[Guest]

So you are cute. You're adorable.

[Jen]

Yes. Okay. There are a few, a handful of times where I saw what I'm going to call for lack of a better word, like ideas first. Spending. Yeah, you just have this like spark of something you want to do. And whether or not you have it immediately available to you, you're. You're going to buy the things to make that possible. So one example that I noticed in your spending inventory, because you described it for us. So thank you for your little journal.

[Guest]

In the book. You give like a list of questions. It's like a page long of like when you're doing your spending, spending inventory, ask yourself this is. Yeah, but don't ask it for every single one. But then I'm like, if I remember it for that one.

[Sam]

And it was so helpful.

[Guest]

Yeah. Yeah.

[Jen]

So at one point you and your boyfriend, I guess, had it in your hearts that you wanted smash burgers. But apparently you didn't have a griddle or smasher to make the burgers, so you bought it.

[Guest]

Yeah.

[Jen]

This is how you could have Smashburgers.

[Guest]

We did make them that night.

[Jen]

Oh, yeah. I believe that you implemented on it. But I think, you know, the adorable and interesting part of that is the idea came first, like, this is what I want and even if I don't have those things, then I'm going to immediately go out and buy those things. I think another example of this was the relay race shirts and headbands. And I do see that a lot of people do reimburse.

[Guest]

Okay, okay, okay.

[Sam]

The headband and the shirt.

[Jen]

The relay race of we all need Matt matching shirts. And then I'm going to now implement upon this. I'm sure it was well received and it did sound like people paid you back. But for an example, I think we also saw it with the gift giving as well. We've talked about the beauty of your gift giving and kind of the ideas behind giving homemade gifts and the shipping costs. But I think, maybe, you know, the idea first of I want it to be embroidery. And now it doesn't even matter how much it's going to cost to ship it. I'm going to do this thing. So a lot of those. In looking back, I'm hearing you say, like, I loved this and I'm going to change nothing about that. And that's beautiful. But I do think there could be something just to be aware of in that of when you have an idea to then wonder, okay, but do I have it already within my resources now to implement upon this? If not, is there a way that I could without purchasing more or do I. Is there another idea that I could come up with that would keep me from needing to like, make this extra trip? I do also wonder if your trips to the grocery store are connected to that. Like the idea of, well, I already said I'm going to make Mac and cheese, so now I need to go to the store to get these things rather than this is what I already have on hand. So this is what I'm going to bring to the potluck. That kind of a thing. I would be curious how often it's the idea first and then the spending for just whatever that idea was versus let me start with what I already have, what's already within my resources, and try and solve whatever problem that is.

[Sam]

The most common thing we see with spending. I have an idea. The idea is good, like a DIY gift and then immediately we go to buy the things to do the idea. And what we have been using lately is this four question filter to filter through these ideas. So we have the idea. We first ask, okay, how can I execute this idea for free? So what can I borrow from friends? What can I maybe, like, trade? What can I get for free on Facebook Marketplace or from a buy nothing group? Stuff like that? What can I repurpose or reuse in my home? You can use a large cup to smash ground.

[Guest]

I'm not even gonna take. I'm not gonna take. I am not gonna take the blame for the smash burgers. Okay, you don't, Quinlan, let me tell you.

[Jen]

You don't.

[Guest]

No, no, no. Let me tell you. We have a cast iron pan at home. And I was like, oh, we can just use the cast iron pan to smash the burgers. Or like, yeah, you are resourceful.

[Sam]

Well, make sure Quinlan watches this part of the video. I think.

[Guest]

Okay, that part I would like to just. I'm not getting on record. So the smash burger thing, I did try to use what we already had. And he's like, no.

[Sam]

So the first question is, how can I, like, use what I already have so I can execute my idea for free? Because the idea is not what is bad. We want to be able to execute our ideas. Right. The second is, how can I do low cost? So, like, how can I maybe find a griddle on Facebook Marketplace or a smasher? Also, specialized tools in the kitchen are not bad if we're going to do it a lot. I have a waffle maker and a salad spinner. Those are very often things. I see people all the time say, you don't need in a kitchen. I use them frequently. So really, how can I get it secondhand? Is that second. Second strategy? Next is how can I get a deal on it? So I'm looking at coupons, I'm looking at rebates. The traditional frugal, you know, method is actually our third filter. And then the fourth is, okay, if I'm going to buy this new, how can I buy it guilt free? So local, sustainable, keeping money in the community, stuff like that. And if I can't do any of those, is it worth it? Is the idea actually good enough to execute if I can't fulfill it with any of these four filters? So, like the DIY stuff.

[Guest]

Stuff. Great.

[Sam]

Did you know that there is a secondhand craft store in. Is it Seminole? It's all secondhand craft stuff that's brand new. Yeah, it's. There's one in Brandon and Largo. All secondhand, like Almost brand new craft stuff. So.

[Jen]

And they exist all over the place.

[Sam]

And then they exist all over the place. So, like, it's just kind of getting the idea and before we automatically fulfill it with new stuff, which I know you already. I mean, you, you thrift. You're like, you are frugal, but it's also like always taking that time to try to get creative with how we execute the idea.

[Jen]

And I think then this is paired with being able to take inventory at the end of at least every month of what did all my good decision making lead to margin here? And how can I pull that aside, put it into a high yield savings account and start beefing up that emergency fund. I'll also throw myself under the bus because I got a pet bird because I saw a good deal on a birdcage at a yard sale. I just liked it. I just thought it was cute.

[Sam]

Haven't we all impulsed.

[Jen]

Thought it was a cute.

[Guest]

Yes.

[Jen]

Thought it was a cute bird cage, then said, let me go get a bird to put in the birdcage.

[Guest]

So.

[Jen]

So we've all done it and I think, like, think it's worth pulling that specifically to the service because I think many of our viewers will commiserate and. Yeah, you're very seen by the. Yeah, it's the idea I want to implement on my idea immediately.

[Guest]

Yeah. It is interesting that you say that about groceries. I think that can be the case sometimes. Like, I'm like, oh, I really want to make this thing and then like, go get other things. But the other thing is I don't have a lot of food waste. Like, I don't like, that's great. I don't like, like buying all these groceries and then they're like, yeah, going back because I'm not making what I thought I was gonna make or like, whatever. So it's also like, I don't know that that's the problem, you know, Like, I don't know, like, because I'll do that sometimes. But then if I, if I go out and I get these things to make one thing, then I'm like, how can I use these ingredients to make something else so that, that doesn't go bad type thing? So that is also confusing to me.

[Sam]

Because I'm like, how am I supposed.

[Guest]

To put back on groceries if we're eating this food, you know? Yeah, that's also like a struggle.

[Sam]

So maybe then the sol. How do we maybe cut back on how many times a week we're going out and then we look at groceries second yeah. So maybe finding a way to meal plan that works for you.

[Guest]

Yeah.

[Sam]

What do you typically do for meal planning?

[Guest]

Usually when I'm doing it. Well, that is. Is I'll, like, sit down at the beginning of the week, like, Sunday night typically, or, you know, the weekend sometime, and I'll, like, write out, like, the days of the week and then what I plan to kind of eat and, like, when I'll plan to eat leftovers and that type of thing. And then I'll try to, like, factor in, like, Tuesday nights. We go to Trivia. So, like, will I bring something to Trivia?

[Jen]

She will. I can attest.

[Guest]

I will. Like, I'll make something that I can sometimes easily bring with me because it's.

[Sam]

A bar that doesn't necessarily sell food, Right?

[Guest]

Correct.

[Sam]

So that's not a faux pas.

[Guest]

Yeah. So depends on who you ask. But yeah. Yeah.

[Sam]

So if they sell it, maybe don't bring it. But if they don't sell it, I don't think it's a faux pot to bring in.

[Guest]

So, yeah, sometimes I'll. And then I'll factor in, like, okay, like, we're gonna be, I don't know, like, downtown already. So, like, it doesn't make sense to cook that night. So, like, we'll eat out that night. So, yeah, I'll typically plan it out in, like, a week format and then make a list based on the meals that, like, I put on that calendar for the week.

[Jen]

What do you think then is leading to the multiple trips to the grocery store?

[Guest]

I like, that's what I'm trying to think about. It's like, okay, well, I would say that I'm not always on with that. For one. For two, my boyfriend. I don't live together, but we like to eat together. A lot of the times, because I like to cook. He does not. So a lot of times I will cook for us, depending on where we're at. And we don't live in the same location. So sometimes I'll buy things and then I'll end up up not bringing them with me, like, to my house or to. To his house, rather. So then I have to. We have to go to the grocery store and buy things that we can make at his house, and then I'll go back and make that thing that I didn't make at my house for some other time, you know? So I think that's part of it is that, like, being in two separate places and not always having the groceries that I bought with me definitely contributes to it. The other thing is like just not, not planning ahead. Like a lot of times, especially recently with the holidays and everything, like we were doing really well at it. Like we planned, like there were a couple months in a row that we feel like we did really well. We were just like going to the grocery store on Sunday, eating all the food for the week and going to the grocery store on Sunday. Like it was very regimented, which feels really good. Routines feel good, but just, just life gives them away and then fall off of that. So I think, yeah, that's the other part of it is just not being consistent with that.

[Jen]

And I think that's where the benefit of having reviews like this periodically can help with that because we will often with anything, get into a good routine of exercise, sleep, eating, you name it, we can find ourselves in a nice rhythm. Something happens then casts come in town, we go on vacation and sickness, natural disaster, you name it, and everything goes up in the air, holidays. But then oftentimes we don't find our equilibrium again. And so that's where I think some of the overarching ebb and flow rhythm can happen of it might not be for forever, but what if you and your boyfriend found yourself in another place where you're saying, for this next month, let's kind of rein it in and see if we can find a good rhythm. Maybe we're even trying a different meal planning, meal prepping method. Maybe for this month, let's try getting things, you know, making a big batch of something on the weekends so that, you know, we're utilizing all of the food throughout the week. We're not having as many trips to the grocery store you may find that.

[Guest]

Didn'T work for you.

[Jen]

Fine, throw it out the window. Try a different thing for the next week. Yeah, but it could be that you do this for a set amount of time for the purpose of I want to beef up this emergency fund and this isn't going to be always and forever. We know we're going to find ourselves in another rhythm where we are, we're buying more convenience and we're going out because we just want to and we're tired. But allowing yourselves that ebb and flow of for right now, we're buckling down for this purpose. Not restricting for the sake of restricting, but because I want to feel better about an emergency fee for my house.

[Sam]

And something, something you could try is you're, you're going, you're allowing yourself to go to the grocery store once a week, but if there's a, a second time or something that you might need to go challenge yourself to get creative with what you make, just what you have. It's not like a full pantry challenge where you're just using up everything, but, like, you're going to the grocery store every week and you're just challenging yourself to not go back a second or third time. And the same with eating out. Decide how many times a week you want to go out and then don't go out. More than that. Yeah, it's just like kind of giving yourself some parameters to work out. Not being perfect, but creating a routine, a system, a pattern that feels good and that can save you money so that you can feel even better having your home emergencies covered.

[Guest]

Yep.

[Sam]

Well, that is all we have.

[Jen]

We really did it. We went through the whole thing. Sam, we know that this is vulnerable. We really appreciate it.

[Sam]

How do you feel?

[Guest]

I feel good. I feel like there, like, are some things I didn't, you know, think about. Like, I wouldn't necessarily think of impulse spending in the way that you're describing it. Of, like, having an idea and then going to try to fulfill that. Like, I don't know that in my mind categorized that as impulse spending necessarily. I think it's tough also. Like, I think some of my, like, shared moments of, like, going out, being social, like, those things are important to me, and like, the idea of sacrificing those things, like, in that way, you know, like, I. I struggle with that for sure. Like, just I think sometimes being like, in like, my space isn't always, like, peaceful, you know? So, like, going out to a coffee shop can feel really peaceful sometimes. So, like, those types of things, like, it's not necessarily a trade in for me, like, to do coffee at home with a friend versus coffee, like, out in nature, like, in, like, you know, like, I don't know, like, like a. A fun coffee shop feels. Feels different in some ways. So that was.

[Sam]

That was one of the biggest barriers for me to want to pay off debt.

[Guest]

Yeah.

[Sam]

Because Travis and I paid off 78, 000 of debt. But initially I didn't want to because I didn't want to live under a rock for five years. I didn't want to sa going out with my friends, especially because we were young, we didn't have kids. Like, there was just so much freedom I did not want to miss out on.

[Guest]

Yeah.

[Sam]

And what really changed it and what changed the experience for me is knowing that it's not the actual, like, coffee that I want from the coffee shop. It is that change of environment. I don't want to be stuck at home for five years, so then getting creative. Okay. How can I. I get really good coffee at home, so I'm not buying the cheapest coffee. And I am taking it somewhere just as peaceful. Finding places, getting creative, whether that's outside or at the library or whatever. And then also finding friends who want to engage with me, not restaurants. So, yes, sometimes they're coming to my house, but they also want me to come to their house. House. Because, again, I don't want to spend five years of my life stuck in my house. And it ended up being two years, like, thankfully. But, yeah, it's. It's not. We're not sacrificing what we truly want, which is to be social, but finding different ways to get what we truly want. We want to get out of the house, and we want to build community.

[Guest]

Yeah.

[Sam]

And whatever else we truly want. It's keeping those things and getting creative with how we. We meet them and not paying a premium for them when we don't have to.

[Guest]

Yeah.

[Jen]

I love the lack of guilt that I'm hearing in some of this spending. Like, this got me what I wanted, and I don't feel bad about it, But I think also realizing that there could be areas where you do set some parameters and it not need to feel restrictive because you are getting at the thing that actually meets the need in some of these other areas, but then it can be reined in in some other spots too, maybe when it comes to food and maybe just, like, ancillary purchases.

[Guest]

Yeah. Yeah. Cool.

[Jen]

All right, Sam, thank you so much.

[Guest]

Super vulnerable, and we really appreciate you so much. Thanks for having me.

[Sam]

Frugal Friends is produced by Eric Sirianni.